Munchkins v Oompa Loompas:The Sortie of the Shorties

[Max Carnage]

In this corner, hailing from parts unknown, living in fear or feral beasts most of their lives, they were rescued by the benevolent and slightly mad Willie Wonka. Now they use their skills to help produce the worlds most delicious candies...often with chilling effects. Flight-inducing sodapop, gum that turns you into a juice- filled orb, a miniturizing/teleportation machine are just some of the weapons at their disposal. Please welcome...THE OOMPA-LOOMPAS!!!!

And in this corner, from East of the Emerald City in the Land of Oz, living in fear of the Wicked Witch of the East most of their lives, they were rescued from terror when a farm girl dropped a house on their tormentor. A genius, an android, and the king of beasts by their side, they are known for their organizations of the Lullaby League, the Lollipop Guild...and possibly groups more insidious. We wish to welcome you...THE MUNCHKINS!!!!

Who'd win in a battle royal on neutral ground?

Let's get it on!

[Yondan]

You are sick sick sick.

The oompah-loompahs, of course. Those guyz're creepy.

[Max Carnage]

I think that's the highest (if not only) compliment I've been paid on these boards. I got the idea when I went to Star Wars Celebration II. One of the autographers had played a Loompah. The picture made me jump when I saw it.

[Tars Tarkas]

Is that the movie Oompah Loompahs or the pre-movie book Oompah Loompahs, with the pictures banned in 50 countries (not really, but i have to put this rider in so i don't get yelled at)

[Max Carnage]

Well I tried to combine the two. I know the book had them more like pygmies, thus the rescue from the jungle. But you gotta factor in the ultimate creepiness of the orange-skinned Oompahs.
I give the Oompah Loompahs an edge what with their abillity to speak in riddles and have words come flying out and possibly smack a few Munchkins around.

[jjimm]

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory was on TV in Ireland yesterday morning. I watched it again while hungover. Sorry, the Oompah Loompahs win, hands-down. They scare the living bejesus out of me. Why would anyone think these tiny orangemen were suitable for kids??? Think of the children, I beseech you.

[Fenris]

No way.

Geeze. Munchkins are immortal. Per Baum (paraphrased quote, but very close to verbatim) "No Ozzite can die. You could chop them up into hamburger and it would still be alive" and get better.

On the other hand, you have wussy Oompa-Loompas: the banned black ones, the hippie Californian ones or the orange 'n' green movie ones. ANY of them can be killed by "Snozzwangers, hornswogglers or dreadful vermicious Knids." They were starving to death when Wonka found 'em! Sounds like these guys are such wimps that a strong breeze would knock 'em over.

And as a matter of fact, Veruca Salt (an 8 year old girl!) was able to slap a bunch of 'em around without too much trouble.

Munchkins would kick Oompa-ass!

Fenris

[Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor]

What about the Jawas?
How about the Hobbits?

Equal time for all teeny-weenie people!
Especially on the battlefield!

[JThunder]

Let's see. The munchkins failed to pile onto the Wicked Witch of the West, even after Glinda mentioned that she had no power in Munchkinland.

Victory goes to the Oompahs.

[Tars Tarkas]

No, if you add in all the little people, then Wicket will fight the Lepracauhn will fight Willow will fight Professor Flitwick will fight Warwick Davis, causing the universe to collaspe in on itself!


But i wouldn't mind if any person, big or small, beat the crap out of Twiki!

[Yondan]

You didn't get any chocolate for the holidays, did you Fenris?

[Little Nemo]

The Fraggles would kick all their asses.

[BalmainBoy]

Did you see those Lollypop Kids in the Wizard of Oz? They were cute bovver boys in blundstone booties. At least THEY would kick Oompah butt.

[Chronos]

Are we ruling out interference from Glinda and Willy Wonka?

[Fenris]

Originally posted by Chronos
Are we ruling out interference from Glinda and Willy Wonka?

Probably.

But just in case not, either Willy Wonka (book or movie) could kick Movie-Glinda's helium-filled butt, but the cool, urbane, uber-powerful Glinda from the books could whip either/both Wonka's chocolate asses. And let's not even consider the whole Ozma factor.

Fenris

[kingpengvin]

"OOOOO are those the Grunka Lunkas??
Tell them I HATE THEM!"

Proffesser Farnsworth

[kingpengvin]

"OOOOO are those the Grunka Lunkas??
Tell them I HATE THEM!"

Proffesser Farnsworth

[kingpengvin]

He really must hate them form me to post twice

[Max Carnage]

Must have been asking about the secret ingredient and armed guards.

[Tars Tarkas]

"Unka Grunka dumpity Darmed Guards..."

"Shut up!!!" ---Bender

[crazy4chaucer]

A battle between the Oompah-Loompahs and the Munchkins? Interesting thought. One might think that it would end in a victory for the Munchkins--if only because they cannot be killed. However, they can be chopped up into teeny tiny little pieces, in which case the Oompah-Loompahs would have effectively won. It would get to a point where even though they were still alive the Munchkins could cause no further harm to the Oompah-Loompahs.

So I'm going to side with the Oompah-Loompahs. Besides, I like chocolate! :)

[Max Carnage]

Originally posted by Fenris
No way.

Geeze. Munchkins are immortal. Per Baum (paraphrased quote, but very close to verbatim) "No Ozzite can die. You could chop them up into hamburger and it would still be alive" and get better.

Fenris

Then what happened to the Witches of East and West? (Didn't read any books past the original so if they came back from the 'dead' I don't know it)

[Ranchoth]

Wait a second...If the Munchkins are immortal, why did they have a cornoner? I can think of only two reasons...

1. The coroner was some Munchkin politician's (The mayor?) no-good half brother, enjoying a cushy job. Or...

2. They needed him to help cover up, and "legitimize" the deaths from the Munchkin's long-going covert war against the other fantasy-races of fantasyland.

It would be the perfect cover, really...The lollipop guild, the lullabye league...all fronts for the Munchkin Intelligence Agency's brutal military arm.

Of course, as Little Nemo said, the presence of Fraggle mercs could swing the tides of war in the oompa-loompa's favor. I mean, just look at the Fraggle's almost casual destruction of those little caterpillar guys' infrastructure.

Speaking of Fraggles, did anyone else get the impression that Mokey and Red were...um...you know...oh, Nevermind.

Ranchoth

[Koxinga]

Let's throw in the little people of the Sid and Marty Kroft universe. Would the Bugaloos (http://users.myepath.com/morfhis/Bugloony.htm) turn the tide in this battle? How about the Shrinkies from Dr. Shrinker (http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Hills/6009/drshrink.htm)?

[Koxinga]

BTW, if the Munchkins were immortal, then how was it possible for one to commit suicide on the set?

[BalmainBoy]

2nd thoughts, that confirm the first: Oompa-loompas couldn't even handle a shopping trolley rolled towards them. How could they overwhelm falsetto falstaffian dwarfs?

[betenoir]

Originally posted by Fenris
ANY of them can be killed by "Snozzwangers, hornswogglers or dreadful vermicious Knids." They were starving to death when Wonka found 'em!
Fenris

Have you ever battled a vermicious Knid!? They're a fomidable enemy, let me tell you. And the point is, the Oompa's had been dealing with them for generations before Wonka found them, and they were still fighting the good fight. Whereas, those Munchkins collapesed like a house of cards the minute one witch showed up, and didn't do shit for themselves till Dorethy happened to intervene for them.


But the deciding factor has to be the Oompa's insane moral fanatisism, which would certainly drive them to destroy the decadent, lollypop- licking, curly-shoe-wearing Munchkins.

No question.

[Fenris]

Originally posted by betenoir


Have you ever battled a vermicious Knid!? They're a fomidable enemy, let me tell you.

They're giant blobs of silly putty that can spell out words. That's it. In the sequel Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator, we see that the only thing that would be scarier than a vermicious Knid would be, say, EVERYTHING!

And movie Muchkins may have coroners but book Muchkins don't.

I'll stand by my assertion that if an 8 year old girl can beat up a platoon of Oompa-Loompas, even obvious sissies like The Lollipop Guild could whip the Oompa's orange butts.

Fenris

[Aro]

Yoda.

When small as him you are, lose at battle you will not.

[diku]

Just remember, the person that started this thread absolutely hates the Wizard of Oz. So there's a built in bias. And I'd take the munchkins, on a numbers basis.

[Tars Tarkas]

Originally posted by Max Carnage

Then what happened to the Witches of East and West? (Didn't read any books past the original so if they came back from the 'dead' I don't know it)

Well, originally you could die in Oz. then some fairy lady put a spell on the country so no one would age and no one would die. So babies are now babies forever. I don't know if they ever get potty trained. Also, money was used in the first two books, then after that was phased out.

I bet if the Munchkins and Oompah Loompahs got in a fight, the real winners would be the Time Bandits, as they would steal all their stuff while they are fighting.

[auntie em]

All creepiness aside, the Oompah Loompahs were too damn passive. Granted, they have deeper voices than the Munchkins, but the Munchkins had the power to organize, where as the Oompah Loompahs allowed themselves to be ripped from their homeland (by Gene Wilder's freaky ass, no less--would you let him lure you into his van?) and transplanted as slaves/indentured servants in a factory!

The Munchkins at least had elected officials, and various advocacy groups going on, and still have the Home Court Advantage. They're kind to intruders, sure-- but they were the first to tell Dotty and her damn dog where to go, now weren't they?

[shelbo]

The Oompahs, using their superior organizaion and battlefield communications, honed by years of work in the super-competitive battlefield of capitalism, defeat the Munchikins, who were hampered by persistant internal squabbles between the lolipop guild and the lullaby league over which would assume battlefield command.