Least favorite movies

[Kat]

People are listing these on the favorite movie thread anyway:

In the category of It Could Have Been So Much Better With Decent Acting and Writing Because I Liked the Concept:
-Waterworld

In the category of I Expected Kevin Costner + Robin Hood To Be Better:
-Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves

In the category of The Only Movies I Couldn't Watch All The Way Through:
-Cabin Boy
-Summer City

I'm sure I'll come up with more.

What are yours?

[middsy]

Star wars films

[Globe-trotter]

Mars Attack!
No amount of beer could make it funny.

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I prefer rogues to imbeciles because they sometimes take a rest.
Alexandre Dumas the Younger (1824-1895)

[TheNerd]

Any Batman movie other than the first one Burton directed.

Lost in Space. I didn't want to see it, I was coerced.

Star Wars Episode 1: Way too much a kids movie.

I've never seen Cabin Boy, but EVERYBODY tells me that it's the worst movie ever made. One of these days, I'm going to rent it, and see why they say this.

Worst movies that I've ever seen:
Anaconda, and Porky's. I was actually VERY upset that I spent $.47 to rent Porky's. Didn't even finish watching it, and that's saying alot, since I ALWAYS finish watching every movie I see.
Oh yea, and Surf Ninjas. 'Nuff Said.

Adam

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"Life is hard...but God is good"

[Ike Witt]

Armageddon was neat to look at, but otherwise an awful and cheesy movie.

[AWB]

Oh, man. Where to begin?
[list] There's Something About Mary - I barely laughed at anything in this movie, except for the scene where Ted (Ben Stiller) is getting the crap beat out of him in the SC jail. That was hillarious.

A rather urbane couple had raved about TSAM. My wife and I now seriously doubt their judgement.

Double sad: they're making a sequel!

Man Trouble - Sad attempt by serious actors to do a screwball comedy. It just didn't work.

Bringing Up Baby - Same as above. Grant can do screwball; Katharine Hepburn can't. I don't care what Leonard Maltin says.

Solarbabies - GAG!

¡Átame! (Tie me up! Tie me down!) - "Thoughtprovoking and energetically performed" said Maltin. Only because it was a foreign film. You wouldn't take money to see an English version of this one.

[UncleBeer]

The world's worst movie had to be, "Jefferson in Paris." It didn't really seem to follow any of the history I've learned, although it's fashionable to revise history now. The entire film (at least the 40 minutes I saw before walking out) was about the education of his daughter.

Really sad, I was expecting much more from this in.

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Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
- Ambrose Bierce

[middsy]

How can you not like Porkies, that was a cult classic!

[kellibelli]

I LIKED Atame...

anyway, the worst movie EVER made is "oceans of fire"
its about an oil rig, and I think one of the trapper john cart was in it..god it sucked, and my ex rented it EVERY SINGLE TIME I let him go get a movie alone.
The last time...I went to work, and did paperwork on my own time just so I wouldnt have to sit through it again...he insisted every time, that he had never seen it before- drug addict!

[Gr8Kat]

Escape from LA: big, dumb, loud, stupid, crappy special effects, terrible acting, utterly non-sensical. I hate this movie with the blinding passion of ten-thousand suns.

Pulp Fiction: maybe if I'd seen it in the theater when it was new I'd feel differently; the big screen seems to weave a spell over me (Escape from LA excepted). But I didn't, I rented it and could not see what the hype was about.

Beloved: The Color Purple meets The Exorcist. When I'd read that Oprah's character was haunted by the ghost of her daughter, I'd imagined that was to be taken metaphorically. But when the opening shot of the movie was the family dog being tossed around in the air and Oprah trying to put its eye back in the socket, I knew I was in for more than I'd bargained. In another thread I said the Poltergeist is the only horror movie that's ever really creeped me out. I'd forgotten about Beloved. My husband was working graveyard at the time I saw this movie, and I hated being alone that night.

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"I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it," Jack Handy

[ChiefScott]

Anything with Albert Brooks.

[Ike Witt]

The movie where Sly is an arm wrestling truck driver is called Over The Top. The sad thing somebody thought that was a good idea for a movie.

[Dirty Devil]

"Pretty Woman" is, by far, the worst movie ever made.

[bernard]

Only two movies that I can think of have earned a 0/10 on my scale of movie ratings.

1) Fargo.
2) Event Horizon.

However, Event Horizon earns a special recognition. Simply put ... I think that a foundation should be setup to buy every copy of Fargo and burn it; however, if I won the lottery I would seriously consider using my own personal money to buy every copy of Event Horizon so that I could burn it!

Of course, there are plenty of other stinkers out there (I haven't seen it yet, but Eyes Wide Shut according to my friend is a definite candidate for a 0 score).

Anything directed by Blake Edwards or Oliver Stone--I have never liked a single one of their films, and Stone in particular has been getting worse and worse with each passing decade.

[bernard]

I don't know who Blake Edwards is but I'll second that for Oliver Stone.

Also, most anything with Kevin Costner in or directing a movie pretty much guarentees that it will get a low score in my book. The exception being "The Untouchables" which was quite good (my theory is that the twin postive ions of De Niro and Connery overcame the negative ion of Costner).

[Jophiel]

Cruel Intentions. Had I taken four bucks and set them on fire, I would of gained more enjoyment from watching the pretty colors than I got from this film. At least it would of been over quicker. Wow, there was 93 minutes of my life that I deserve to get back. Ok, I wasn't expecting the world from this flick, but good sweet heavens was it horrible. The dialouge was insipid, and I've seen better acting out of the kid playing a tree in the 2nd grade Christmas pagent. "It's a modern retelling of Dangerous Liasons" Look, first off, Dangerous Liasons doesn't need a modern retelling; it's not like it was filmed in the 1700's or something - that's just the scenery you're seeing there. And secondly, just rent Dangerous Liasons if you want to see it, don't get this piece of tripe. Sheesh. I'm done ranting now.

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"I guess it is possible for one person to make a difference, although most of the time they probably shouldn't."

[Babar714]

Worst movies:

1)Batman & Robin
2)Armageddon
3)Lost in Space
4)Anything with Paully Shore
5)Anything with Steven Segall
6)Scream and I Know What You Did...crap
7)Anything directed by Paul Verhoven
8)Any movie in which Brad Pitt attempts an accent
9)Any sci-fi that is obviously trying not to me like Star Wars/Trek and is still not original
10)Ishtar. I like it, but it still sucks.

[Gr8Kat]

7)Anything directed by Paul Verhoven

*Gasp!* Including Robocop?

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"I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it," Jack Handy

[Gail]

I'm reposting on this same topic.
Anyway, I must be a very picky movie watcher.

These are my rules for movies:
1. No executions, public or otherwise
2. No torture
3. No bible times
4. No Roman empires
5. I prefer not to watch movies that are only about romance.
6. A movie about teenagers has to be really well received before I watch it.
7.No violence for the sake of violence.

Otherwise I don't want to waste two hours watching it.



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Gail
"Any major dude with half a heart surely will tell you, my friend--
Any minor world that breaks apart falls together again...."
-Steely Dan

[UncaStuart]

Showgirls--I rented it to see if it was as bad as everyone in the known universe had said, and was amazed at how jaw-droppingly worse it was.

Armageddon--How DO these things get financed?

The Family Jewels--OK, a blast from the past, Jerry Lewis in 1965 playing multiple roles. I saw it as the second film of a double feature (remember them?) two weekends in a row in high school, and nearly had to be taken out in restraints.

Any Police Academy.

[Persephone]

Pretty Woman positively sucked. For this reason, I will not see Runaway Bride. Why would I want to see those two together again? Bleah!

I really liked Mars Attacks, though...the Martians on stage with Tom Jones was just too funny.

[Bluepony]

My wife rented out Bridges of Madison County . I was passed out asleep in my popcorn bowl not soon after the opening credits.

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"...send lawyers, guns, and money..."

Warren Zevon

[RFlowers]

Anyway, I must be a very picky movie watcher.
These are my rules for movies:
1. No executions, public or otherwise
2. No torture
3. No bible times
4. No Roman empires
5. I prefer not to watch movies that are only about romance.
6. A movie about teenagers has to be really well received before I watch it.
7.No violence for the sake of violence.

You are surely excluding some truly awful films with the last three, but the first four prohibit too much fascinating subject matter. You may miss some very good things.

Russell Flowers
http://www.accessky.net/users/flowershome/

[topolino]

I can't recall ever walking out on a movie but the worst movies I ever saw in a theater would be:

Natural Born Killers-people just kept leaving. I should have followed them but I kept expecting it to get good.

Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me-it's the Laura Palmer Crying movie starring Laura Palmer!

The Thin Red Line-someone on here said that the best actor in the whole movie was the grass. That is hilariously true. I so wanted to like this movie. I don't normally ask for my money back after seeing a movie (it's a theater, not a library. If the movie sucks, hell, *I* chose to see it). Anyway, not only was the movie itself AWFUL but it was interrupted about three times by the film getting caught and melting. This did give the members of the audience time to talk about how bad the movies was though. I took the free passes they were handing out

The Big Lebowski-every man I know loves this movie. Apparently it just wasn't made with me in mind because I didn't think it was funny. The only thing I liked about it was Steve Buscemi and they killed him off.

In my own home, I had the unfortunate experience of seeing Fargo (what a waste of Steve Buscemi), Tie Me Up Tie Me Down, Crash...I'm sure there's more but these were all movies that I expected to be good.

[pricciar]

Wow, a bunch of my fave movies are listed here. Hmph. Cabin Boy, Bringing up Baby, Mars Attacks, and Star Wars they are all great.

Well, two of em have Tim Burton's hand in it, he seems to be someone you either love or hate.

oh well.

my least favorite movie thats out right now is the Blair Witch Project.

My least favorite movie I can remember watching.
Compromising Positions.

ouch, awful. Rented it cuz Raul Julia is usually good for a laugh. nope, dont touch it.. yuck


pat

[According to Pliny]

Movies that everybody else liked but I hated:

The English Patient
Mission Impossible
Remains of the Day
Summer of Sam

[Gail]

1. Virtuosity Oh Denzel, how could you?

2. The Bounty. Everytime this is on, my husband has to watch it. Now I'm wondering if he's starting to identify with that sick bastard Captain Bligh, as played by Anthony Hopkins. Graphic torture and cruelty do not make an entertaining film.

3. Speaking of Anthony Hopkins: I hated "Nixon" too. I just couldn't find anything believable about it--A good movie about the Watergate era is "All the president's men."

4. And...I know people will disagree with me, but I hated Natural Born Killers, too.

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Gail
"Any major dude with half a heart surely will tell you, my friend--
Any minor world that breaks apart falls together again...."
-Steely Dan

Cabin Boy is HILARIOUS. That kind of clean, witty humor really is unique and so hard to find.

I hate any movie that is set a long time ago, but features a soundtrack comprised of modern pop crapolla. (i.e. Titanic, Robin Hood)

I recently watched a movie about a truck driving Sylvester Stallone who enters an arm wrestling competion. If anyone knows the name of it, please tell me. That movie was totally ridiculous - my current least favorite.

[pricciar]

Finally, someone agrees with me on the whole Cabin Boy issue.

Oh, I think that Sylvester Stallone movie was called Over the Top. Wow, what dreck. I don't know how he got involved with such bad pictures, I mean he wrote the original Rocky, which was a pretty nifty film. And the first First Blood had alot going for it. Then the Rambos started coming, and they had alot of nothing going for them.

pat

[Shirley Ujest]

This is going to ruin my therapy, but does anyone out there remember " The Black Hole" It was Disney's attempt at a sci/fi in the late 70's/early 80's and I was maybe 11 or 12 and my sci/fi-aholic brothers took me to see it. After 20 minutes I was begging for the car keys to take myself home.My bullshit filter was apparent even at such a young age.
The only other movie I ever went to with any of my siblings was.." Electric Horseman."

Y

[Stoid]

I'm really shocked at what some of you consider really terrible, or the movie you hated most. I can see anyone not caring much for just about anything, tastes differ, but to declare some of these movies as absolute bottom of the barrel seems to be really overstating it.

Case in point: "Pretty Woman". You REALLY think this is a worse film than, say, "Sphere"? "Porkys"? "Rhinestone Cowboy"? "Anaconda"? "Friday the 13th Parts 1-100"?
"September"? "Look Who's Talking Now"? "Staying Alive"? "Showgirls"?

I mean, gosh, people, get your priorities in order. At least PM was professionally done, easy on the eyes, and pleasant.

And ChiefScott: I don't know who you hang out with, but I would be ashamd to say that about Albert Brooks. He is brilliant. You may not like him, but he is truly brilliant and original.



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He who laughs last thinks slowest.

[dougie_monty]

Least favorite kind of movies:
The good-ol'boy-in-18-wheeler-smash-cop-car
movies.
I've heard of two of these: Smokey and the Bandit and Breaker, Breaker. If these movies are anything like their TV ads you couldn't get me to go watcgh them at guinpoint. I don't see that a beer-guzzling trucker ramming police cars is any kind of entertainment, let alone a laughinig matter. Too bad, Burt and Sally.

[hansel]

Bitter Moon, by Roman Polanski. Every erotic cliché done cheesier than the last. Starring Hugh Grant; who the hell hires Hugh Grant for an erotic movie?

[AuntiePam]

Came so close to walking out of that movie with Demi Moore and Robert Redford -- she's married to Woody Harrelson (struggling architect?) and Redford pays them some astronomical sum so he can sleep with Demi.

Stoopid stoopid stoopid

Have totally blocked out the name of this POS.

(Loved Fargo)

[eden]

bernard: now YOU I would go to the movies with. I have never figured out why people like Kevin Costner, and I loathed Fargo, which all my friends thought was hilarious. (yeah, dead bodies in a wood chipper, my idea of a big yuk!)

My list also includes:

Seven--I had to leave
Any of the Home Alone series--and we wonder why the next generation is so violent

[Finagle]

Two movies stand out in my mind -- one from the 70's and one from the 80's so you *know* they must have been stinkers.

The first, Winter Kills. A thinly disguised rehashing of the Kennedy assassination and associated theories behind it. Utterly awful. Pointless, disjointed ...words failed me then and they fail me now.

The second, a Dudley Moore movie called Mickey and Maude (he ends up married to two different women). A movie so cringingly painful that I told the friends I was with that I'd rather be at work than in the movie theater (and at the time, we were programming this horribly clunky, abstruse code for a futile project).

[Heath Doolin]

Aw man...Porky's is the funniest.

I DARE anyone not to laugh at the coaches sitting as Ballbricker tries to convince the dean to identify a guilty Johnson.

I dug Virtuosity simply on the Russel Crowe. I consider him one of the finest actors of our time. SID 6.7 was one of the more memorable bad guys. Other than that they could have had a nobody as the hero.

Ok..now that I smashed a few I hate...time fo my I hates.

Hated.
The Astronaut's Wife- GOD DAMN that was swill. First movie I ever walked out of ever. NOBODY go see it, Nobody rent it. Rent Rosemary's baby its the same!

Freejack- Sorry but nothing could save this flick. How they thought Mick Jagger was a good bad guy is beyond me. Mick, stick with the Stones for God's sakes!

Thats it. I can take a good bad movie, even BeastMaster. I thrive one shlock but only so much

[Cowboy Greg]

Worst movie I've ever seen in the theater would have to be "The Net". Within the first three minutes my eyes had become permanently rolled upwards from the sheer inanity of what passed for dialog, not to mention the desire to slap Sandra Bullock silly just for her snivelling. Movies like that need warning labels.

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Someday we'll look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject....

[Omniscient]

Dear God, what is wrong with you people. Now many of these films are atrocious, some good, but I can't accept that most would be the worst movie you've seen. I think you guys are just bashing a popular movie because its popular and not of your style. I don't expect people to love these films, but saying they're the worst is sensational at best.

Crime #1: How can anyone claim Seven is the worst movie they've seen and walk out on it? Then place it next to Home Alone on the shit-o-meter??? You can't be serious, I understand not liking a slow cerebral movie on a gory and unsettling topic, but you can't really believe its terrible prima facia.

Crime #2: Armageddon is a great movie for its genre. Again it may be a meritless genre in your eyes, or you aren't impressed by SFX, but it is a cool flick. The effects are stunning, the sound impressive, and if you suspend disbelief for 2.5 hrs you'll be caught up in it. Its about entertainment, not a pulitzer, or nobel prize.

Crime #3: Porky's defined it genre and is hilarious by all accounts. Now if you don't like high school movies fine, but its better than a Troma movie.

Crime #4: Star Wars is epic. You may not love it, but saying its worst, again tells me your more inerested in being unique.

I could go on, but every worst movie discussion deviates to movies everyone liked/got good reviews that I didn't like. I want to hear about the dregs of the film world. Stuff whose story lines are surpassed by your average porno.

There however are movies here worthy. Cabin Boy, Waterworld, Surf Ninjas, Escape from LA, Over the Top are canidates.

I contribute The Postman, Cool World, Jack Frost, My Giant and some sequels that went south.

[Heath Doolin]

Got to agree with you there cere

Seven was unsettling.. I really cannot ever remeber getting nausea from one movie but Seven did it for me in Spades. And you know, I LIKED having it turns the old screws on me. I about near puked when Sloth was found to be alive. And in that, I found that the move was a work of art. To inspire such feelings in me while making a make belive subject seem real is truly a art of filmaking.
Think about it...Films that pull you in and you forget its not real. In this, Seven is a masterpiece. I rank it up there next to Saving Private Ryan in this respect. Same unsettling but worse for Ryan knowing that war is like that

I bow to you Cere...hard to find a good connisuer of the art of film these days. You hit it right on the head of what was trying to be portrayed.

I am really looking forward to Fight Club. I hear it may be the next sleeper

[Heath Doolin]

Got to agree with you there Omni

Seven was unsettling.. I really cannot ever remeber getting nausea from one movie but Seven did it for me in Spades. And you know, I LIKED having it turns the old screws on me. I about near puked when Sloth was found to be alive. And in that, I found that the move was a work of art. To inspire such feelings in me while making a make belive subject seem real is truly a art of filmaking.
Think about it...Films that pull you in and you forget its not real. In this, Seven is a masterpiece. I rank it up there next to Saving Private Ryan in this respect. Same unsettling but worse for Ryan knowing that war is like that

I bow to you Cere...hard to find a good connisuer of the art of film these days. You hit it right on the head of what was trying to be portrayed.

I am really looking forward to Fight Club. I hear it may be the next sleeper

[Heath Doolin]

Damn double post...Sorry Omni

- Batman and Robin--I rented this and saw it for the first time last week, and it was truly one of the worst stinkers I've ever seen. I thought the critics were out to lunch when they denounced this movie, but after watching it, I'd say that I'd rather sit through "Barney's Adventure" twice than see this one again.

- Superman IV: The Quest for Peace.

- Any of the "Critters" movies.

- Any slasher flick, especially the Friday the 13th series. I hate gore with a passion, although I used to be a horror book and movie buff.

- Sheena, Queen of the Jungle (?).

- Clifford.

I'm sure there are plenty of others, but those are the ones that come readily to mind.

[SqrlCub]

Absolutely hated previously mentioned:
Solarbabies, Over the Top

Absolutely hated but never mentioned:
Howard the Duck, George Lucas at his finest
Beastmaster II, Portal through Time

Hated but other people liked:
Howard's End, Yuck! Get a decent plot line. Character development may be fine, but they have to do something.


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"People's Poet don't die, we'll kill ourselves if you do, but first we'll take off all our clothes." The Young Ones

[Diane]

Say what???

Fargo?
NBK?
Pulp Fiction?
Porky's?
Cabin Boy?
Seven?
Mars Attack?

Those movies are great!

The Blair Witch Project, now THAT was a piece of shit!!!


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>^,,^<
KITTEN

Coarse and violent nudity. Occasional language.

[jane_says]

Does anyone remember "The Jerk?"

[jane_says]

Does anyone remember "The Jerk"?

[BurnMeUp]

I Love the Jerk!

"Pay to the order of Iron Balls McGinty... one dollar and NINE CENTS!"

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Don't let the loveless ones sell you a world wrapped in grey.

[jane_says]

And no, by "jerk" I don't mean dumb, redundant posters. :)

[Sealemon88]

Interesting. A lot of the movies mentioned here I liked..Fargo, Blair Witch Project, and Seven.

Personally, I think part of the key to weither you really enjoy a movie or not is what your expectations are.

Movies I would have hated if I didn't know what to expect:Fargo, Blair Witch, Armeggedon, Con Air, any Jackie Chan flick,The Mummy (I knew going in that it was more of a Raiders of the Lost Ark rip off than a horror movie, so I wasn't disapointed like many people).

Movies I didn't like because I went in expecting more: The Thin Red Line, NBK, Event Horizon, Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves.

Phantom Menance goes in here, even though I knew what to expect already....but it STILL sucked. One of those movies that could have been SO much better with some editing, just like Eyes Wide Shut.

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You say "cheesy" like that's a BAD thing.

[PunditLisa]

1) Armageddon - What's bigger? The holes in the plot or Bruce Willis' ego?
2) Pacific Heights - Will the person who told Melanie Griffith she could act please immolate himself?
3) Blue Velvet - Evidence that David Lynch is one step away from the loony bin.
4) Eyes Wide Shut - Stan Kubrick (GRHS) could have joined David at the loony bin.
5) My Best Friend's Wedding - hated it.
6) Demi Moore's version of the Scarlet Letter - If she would have stuck with the original story, she may have had something.
7) A movie with Sharon Stone and one of the Baldwin brothers about a voyeur. I've blocked the name from my memory in an attempt to salvage my sanity.
8) 2001: A Space Odyssey - huh?
9) Interview with a Vampire - Tom Cruise is a babe. But Tom Cruise with blonde hair and fangs is a mistake.

[GuanoLad]

Sharon Stone and er... a Baldwin (I can't keep track, they do crossover genres. Billy I think) was Sliver.

I have never liked any of Stanley Kubrick's movies. Not Clockwork Orange, not The Shining, not 2001, not Dr Strangelove, none of them! Slow boring meandering claptrap! Ugh! I wouldn't be so vehement about it if he wasn't lauded as a genius when in fact he is terrible!

And I don't care that he's dead.

The worst movies I've seen recently include: Armageddon, Escape from LA, The Big Lebowski.

I had a flatmate who insisted I'd love all the tapes he used to rent, and I'd look at the titles, roll my eyes and say "No thanks, I'll just do my own thing". But no, every week "Come on, you'll love this one! You will!"

Will I bollocks! The few times I caved in I instantly regretted it - his tastes were the worst and conflicted with mine in every fashion!

Mind you, this is from someone who owns a copy of Anastasia. :)