Why do I like far eastern women? [Archive] - Straight Dope Message Board

Catalyst

12-01-2002, 07:10 PM

Originally posted by Ryan_Liam
I like far eastern women, I just think there really hot. The problem is though I can't talk to them, you know act normal around them.can any help me to do?

Have any of you been in this same predicament?Any advice would be helpful.

Thanx

It seems that we have similar taste, Ryan. If that's the "predicament" you were referring to, then yeah, I guess I'm on the same boat, though I've been fortunate enough to enjoy moderate success.
Why do you think it is that you can't act normally around them? Nerves? Do you act similarly around other attractive women?
While I'm asking questions, how exactly are you defining "far eastern"?

Ryan_Liam

12-02-2002, 04:24 AM

Yeah I guess it's nerves, as for far eastern I guess it's all of them.

jovan

12-02-2002, 07:14 AM

Hmmm... Eastern women... Must have something to do with the Atlantic air. Or sumpthin.

Silentgoldfish

12-02-2002, 08:10 AM

What are far eastern women? From where I'm sitting you're talking about Americans.

Ryan_Liam

12-02-2002, 10:45 AM

No, women from the far east.you know asia.

Kwyjibo

12-02-2002, 10:57 AM

Originally posted by Ryan_Liam
No, women from the far east.you know asia.
Asia is a pretty big place (Ove 20 countries)...care to narrow it down a bit?

Ryan_Liam

12-02-2002, 10:59 AM

ok japanese and chinese.

Kwyjibo

12-02-2002, 11:20 AM

Originally posted by Ryan_Liam
ok japanese and chinese. Well, if you happen to believe the stereotype that they all know 'Kung Fu', you might be worried that they'll kick your ass...sorry...arse.

D&R :D

Rug Burn

12-02-2002, 11:48 AM

Japanese women are amazing aren't they. I lived there for 3 years and just couldn't get enough of them. The essence of sexy.

Sunspace

12-02-2002, 11:54 AM

From my viewpoint, Japan is in the far west, beyond the western sea.

Oh, I have stood on the shore at Long Beach and watched the waves coming in across 12 000 km of open ocean, and dreamed of the lands beyond...

P.S: If you want to learn Japanse, I recommend the program Power Japanese to start.

zoid

12-02-2002, 12:00 PM

My wife is Japanese so I can relate. Sexy does not begin to describe her.

As for dating - treat the object of your affection like you would any woman, treat her like a person and be nice. I know that's not real helpful but it worked for me.

taichi

12-02-2002, 12:21 PM

And you know what they say...once you go asian, never caucasian ...

;)

Surreal

12-02-2002, 12:25 PM

I agree, Ryan_Liam.

I find Asian women to be far more attractive than white women. Generally speaking, they have better skin, better hair, their brows are not as prominent, they has less body hair, they have more attractive noses (not as big and pointy as white women's), they have higher cheekbones, and they are not as overweight as the women are here in the US. More feminine features all around. I also understand that they 'age' better.

They only beauty category that Asian women are not superior in is breast size. I'm not really a breast-man, so that doesn't matter to me.

Kwyjibo

12-02-2002, 12:29 PM

Originally posted by Surreal
I agree, Ryan_Liam.

I find Asian women to be far more attractive than white women. Generally speaking, they have better skin, better hair, their brows are not as prominent, they has less body hair, they have more attractive noses (not as big and pointy as white women's), they have higher cheekbones, and they are not as overweight as the women are here in the US. More feminine features all around. I also understand that they 'age' better. Oh I dunno. The white women of Siberia can be pretty hairy. :)

Banger

12-02-2002, 12:45 PM

A friend of Korean descent once referred to my brother's dating a few Asian women as a "China Doll Complex", which I took to be a caucasian male's fixation or attraction to women of Asian ethnicity, considering that none were actually Chinese (Korean, Vietnamese and Burmese, IIRC). I'm not sure if this or a variant is a "regular" term that those of Asian descent apply to caucasian men interested in Asian women.

Of course, I have a thing for caucasian women, I'm a caucasian male, and I'm as lost as the OP when it comes to them :smack:

Well, I can talk to them and act normal with them, but they don't seem to think much of the talkative normal me :smack:

Ryan_Liam

12-02-2002, 01:00 PM

I like white women, but I'm going through this 'I think chinese and Japanese women are hot' phase, not to say that they aren't though. :smack:

etv78

12-02-2002, 01:03 PM

I'm with you surreal! Banger, the term I've heard is "Yellow Fever".

robertliguori

12-02-2002, 01:16 PM

Oh, come on, people. The tastiness of the meal depends not upon the color of the wrapping.

Okay, that was a really bad metaphor. But I stand by it.

Rug Burn

12-02-2002, 01:20 PM

Is it just me, or is Japanese a more pleasing language to hear spoken than other Asian languages. I can see a beautiful woman from China, Vietnam, or Korea; but as soon as they open their mouth I just cringe.

Ryan_Liam

12-02-2002, 01:28 PM

Far eastern women for me just seem very interesting at the moment...

Feynn

12-02-2002, 03:46 PM

Ryan... methinks there is a special girl across the pond that you're just afraid to talk to. :)

My tastes swing more towards women named Lola. Her tastes swing towards pasty white guys with auburn hair and freckles.

Lucky me. :)

She knows that I find South American and Middle Eastern women women extremely attractive, two words sums up what I find attractive in a woman.

Salma Hayek. (She's Lebanese and Spanish)

Don't say I didn't warn you. (http://www.salmahayek.org/articles/urban/05.jpg)

http://www.hayekheaven.net/

Lissla Lissar

12-02-2002, 06:36 PM

Japanese women are amazing aren't they. I lived there for 3 years and just couldn't get enough of them. The essence of sexy.

:D

( Suddenly, unendurable smugness emanates from me.)

I just found out that my fiance's brother particularly likes short Asian girls with glasses, which describes me pretty well. He thinks Mr. Lissar has lucked out.

TheLoadedDog

12-02-2002, 07:16 PM

Just be a gentleman. Use the same techniques you'd use on Western women. The only difference (possibly) is you might have to come on a bit less strongly, and be prepared to spend a little more time if there's a lady you'd like to impress). And no, don't expect a lotus blossom. You'll get a swift kick in the goolies before that'll ever happen. Which is good.

Ms TheLoadedDog (http://users.tpg.com.au/brownlee/xmasparty2002.JPG), front row centre, with her sisters. I'm the goofy looking white boy at the back. :D

Astroboy14

12-02-2002, 07:29 PM

Mmmmmmmm! Women!!;)

Phouchg

12-02-2002, 07:31 PM

Originally posted by Ryan_Liam
Why do I like far eastern women?

well...Why not?

Tars Tarkas

12-02-2002, 07:37 PM

I like how Japanese and Cantonese sounds, i'll probably learn Cantonese after i pick up more Japanese. I'd have probably started with that one if i knew i was moving here where like 25% of the pop speaks Cantonese. That and i'm getting big into Canta-pop

And i've heard Sinophile and yellow fever.

Global Citizen

12-02-2002, 07:46 PM

I lived in Tokyo for 2 years. At one stage I was dating a Japanese woman and she wanted to marry me. Quite badly, and to have my children.

I broke up with her, and sometimes still think of her (but probably because I have been girlfriendless for many years now).

Global Citizen

Larry Mudd

12-02-2002, 08:27 PM

Ryan, the reason I linked to bigbadchinesemama (http://www.bigbadchinesemama.com/) was because I think it's a pretty good reaction to the western fetishism of eastern women.

Don't get me wrong, I know where you're coming from on this one-- gone through it myself.

One day, however, I realized that my fascination with asian girls had a lot to do with imaginary attributes, and I often found myself making generalizations that, while superficially complementary, were basically just racist. Including much teeth-gnashing and hand-wringing about how "unapproachable" they were. Any time you catch yourself making such broad generalizations, take a good look at them. Turned out my fixation on asian girls was, in part, "patriarchal, colonialist longings," as BBCM characterizes them. Also, in part, a reflection of the sort of general physical attributes I was and am still attracted to.

My only advice is, when you look at a woman, try to see what she's really about, and don't make a bunch of silly stereotypical assumptions about her. Don't focus exclusively on single attributes of any sort, whether it be ethnicity, boobs, what-have-you. Just look at everyone as an individual.

You'll make less misteps that way, and save yourself a lot of grief.

(Voice of experience.)

Astroboy14

12-03-2002, 07:28 AM

Originally posted by Larry Mudd

My only advice is, when you look at a woman, try to see what she's really about, and don't make a bunch of silly stereotypical assumptions about her. Don't focus exclusively on single attributes of any sort, whether it be ethnicity, boobs, what-have-you. Just look at everyone as an individual.

Seconded!

I know a LOT of women form all different backgrounds and ethnic groups... and there are DARN few of them that I wouldn't want to... errm, uhh, treat honorably and eventually ask for their hand in marriage. :)

I repeat: *Mmmmmm... Women!*

istara

12-03-2002, 09:02 AM

Originally posted by Surreal
I agree, Ryan_Liam.

I find Asian women to be far more attractive than white women. Generally speaking, they have better skin, better hair, their brows are not as prominent, they has less body hair, they have more attractive noses (not as big and pointy as white women's), they have higher cheekbones, and they are not as overweight as the women are here in the US. More feminine features all around. I also understand that they 'age' better.

They only beauty category that Asian women are not superior in is breast size. I'm not really a breast-man, so that doesn't matter to me.
Oh my fucking god.

Ryan_Liam

12-03-2002, 10:28 AM

Originally posted by Larry Mudd
Ryan, the reason I linked to bigbadchinesemama (http://www.bigbadchinesemama.com/) was because I think it's a pretty good reaction to the western fetishism of eastern women.

Don't get me wrong, I know where you're coming from on this one-- gone through it myself.

One day, however, I realized that my fascination with asian girls had a lot to do with imaginary attributes, and I often found myself making generalizations that, while superficially complementary, were basically just racist. Including much teeth-gnashing and hand-wringing about how "unapproachable" they were. Any time you catch yourself making such broad generalizations, take a good look at them. Turned out my fixation on asian girls was, in part, "patriarchal, colonialist longings," as BBCM characterizes them. Also, in part, a reflection of the sort of general physical attributes I was and am still attracted to.

My only advice is, when you look at a woman, try to see what she's really about, and don't make a bunch of silly stereotypical assumptions about her. Don't focus exclusively on single attributes of any sort, whether it be ethnicity, boobs, what-have-you. Just look at everyone as an individual.

You'll make less misteps that way, and save yourself a lot of grief.

(Voice of experience.)

Thanx Larry, I 'll take that advice...

FordPrefect

12-03-2002, 12:19 PM

I wouldn't say I succumb to yellow fever, but I like brunettes with dark eyes. (I also like blondes with blues, or blondes with green, or hazel-eyed redhaired women... but to go with the OP, and the resulting parody thread...)
And it just so happens that the majority of "asian" looking women have these by default, so, yes, asian women are attractive. To a point, and each one is an individual. For example, the highschool I attended had 10 to 12 Chinese students, all of them from Hong Kong (this was back in 89). 7 of them were women, one was model material, she was gorgeous, but snotty and boooorinnnnggg. Another was adorable, fun and if I had not been dating someone (the then soon to be Mrs. Prefect), I am sure we would have hit it off together as more than friends, the others, in terms of physical appearance, were so-so, average people, as I am myself. And their personalities varied as much as the shape of their noses, hair style, blah, blah.

Now it may be due to past cultural and evolutionary situations that provide different ethnic groups with their stereotypical looks, and because of that the current attributes that some North American men find attractive may be found more often in Asian women, rather than African, or South American, does not make them racist. Perhaps their choice of wording may indicate a thread of racism beneath their "love of asian women" but if I, like some respondants, prefer petite women with smaller breasts, dark hair, and an oval face, and I tend to find more asian women with those traits than caucasian women, would that make me a racist person?

I think not.

Goofus

12-03-2002, 12:49 PM

How to make an Asian girl happy (http://www.asianjoke.com/oneline/how_to_make_your_asian_girlfriend_eternally_happy.htm)

You have been warned.

Ryan_Liam

12-03-2002, 12:55 PM

It better not be porno.....

Larry Mudd

12-03-2002, 04:06 PM

Originally posted by FordPrefect
I.... but if I, like some respondants, prefer petite women with smaller breasts, dark hair, and an oval face, and I tend to find more asian women with those traits than caucasian women, would that make me a racist person?

I think not. I'm right with you there, FWIW.

China Guy

12-04-2002, 06:41 AM

there have been other threads on this. I dunno, it's acceptable or even encouraged to have a thing for blondes, but a lot of people call you a pervert if you've got a thing for Asians.

Anyhoo, talk to 'em like you would any other women. Of course, if they speak English as a second language or not much at all, then you've got to make some adjustments (and I don't mean speaking louder :))

Sunspace

12-04-2002, 07:51 AM

I'm learning Japanese. :D

ratty

12-04-2002, 08:29 AM

Larry Mudd, thank you so much for linking to BigBadChineseMama. I have met so many Caucasian men who have 'yellow fever'. It's not perverted, it's just...sad. And more than a little offensive. It's one thing to be attracted to certain features, such as hair or eye color, or body type, but it's completely another to start lusting after what is basically just a racist stereotype. I have discussed this many times with my friends from Japan. Everytime they come to visit me, they get ogled and catcalled by these fever-stricken losers with their racist assumptions. I am constantly apologizing to my friends for the behavior of strangers in my country.

It seems like men with this....attraction, I'll say politely, make several assumptions about Asian (generally Chinese, Korean, or Japanese) women. They all seem to think that Asian women will be passive, quiet, easily dominated, and for some unfathomable reason, insatiable kink-meisters in the bedroom. I'm fairly certain these ideas were planted in their little minds after long hours of solitary 'Asian' porn watching and repeated viewings of the Vietnamese hooker scene in 'Full Metal Jacket'.
:rolleyes:

It's starting to really disgust me. I don't feel like starting a Pit thread about this, since I'm pretty sure there's at least one on this exact topic. So I'll remain polite, and attempt to explain my feelings here: you cannot paint any group of people with so wide a brush. Asian women, and indeed, all women, are individuals. They must be taken solely on their own merits, and their own unique characteristics recognized and appreciated for themselves, not compared with an anachronistic colonial stereotype.

You do realize how offensive all this sounds, don't you? It's the ultimate back-handed compliment. Everyone likes to be told they're attractive. But what you are in effect saying to these women is "I find you attractive not for any of your own merits, nor for your personality or individuality, but simply because you physically conform to the stereotype I have selected."

Would you want someone to say this to you?

istara

12-04-2002, 08:42 AM

Ratty - that was so well expressed. I did do a Pit parody thread on this, but you have put it so much better. Thanks.

jovan

12-04-2002, 09:25 AM

Originally posted by ratty
But what you are in effect saying to these women is "I find you attractive not for any of your own merits, nor for your personality or individuality, but simply because you physically conform to the stereotype I have selected."

Would you want someone to say this to you?

Well, if the stereotype they had in mind was a tall, ectomorphic caucasian male with short brown hair, brown eyes, proeminent nose I don't think I'd mind.

China Guy echoed my sentiments exactly; I don't think being attracted to eastern Asians is in any way different from being attracted to blondes, or brunettes or bears or whatever.

Of course the stereotypes and objectification suck, but is it specific to Asians? It seems to me that blonde stereotypes, among others, are more prevalent than the China doll ones. I don't know, but the "yellow fever" desccribed above just seems like good old-fashioned misogynous stupidity. But then again, I'm not Asian-American. I'm not even American - maybe it's a regional thing. Is it?

It just seemed that some people are just a bit over-reacting, but like I said, I've never been on the receiving end of "yellow fever".

_____
jovan, who's got a thing for the epicanthal fold.

Surreal

12-04-2002, 10:18 AM

I agree with China Guy.

In my case, the preference has absolutely nothing to do with 'anachronistic colonial stereotype'. It is 100% about their physical appearance. That's all there is to it.

I'm sure there are plenty of Asian women who have bad complections, long noses, big feet, prominent brow ridges, dingy scraggly hair, and that lack high cheekbones, but from what I've seen the majority don't have those features. That's why I find them attractive.

To each his/her own.

etv78

12-04-2002, 11:41 AM

It's not about stereotyping for me, either, I merely find them aesthetical pleasing.

Nurobath

12-04-2002, 11:51 AM

Originally posted by ratty
They all seem to think that Asian women will be passive, quiet, easily dominated, and for some unfathomable reason, insatiable kink-meisters in the bedroom.

I once had a female friend accuse me of this very thing when I started dating a Vietnamese woman some years ago. Aside from the fact that she should have known me better than that, her assumption was completely wrong. From my experience Asian women are no more likely to be that way than anyone else.

I have noticed that many American women (notice how I didn't say all ) make this assumption. Seems to be based mostly on some sort of racial terratorialism. "Why don't you like American women"? Hmmm...maybe because they're the only people who ask me that stupid question?

To be fair I know that many American men do believe the stereotypes and act accordingly, though I am not one of them.

Snooooopy

12-04-2002, 01:18 PM

Originally posted by FordPrefect
I wouldn't say I succumb to yellow fever, but I like brunettes with dark eyes. ... And it just so happens that the majority of "asian" looking women have these by default, so, yes, asian women are attractive.

By gum, exactly what I was going to say! Yeah, brunettes with dark eyes are quite hot.

On a related subject, the term I heard for white guys who go out with Asian women exclusively is "rice king."

taichi

12-04-2002, 02:30 PM

Rice King. Potato King. Starch King...Use "queen" and apply it to women as well! It's all about equal opportunity!

;)

Ryan_Liam

12-05-2002, 08:57 AM

Rice king?

China Guy

12-06-2002, 06:02 PM

Originally posted by ratty
Larry Mudd, thank you so much for linking to BigBadChineseMama.

It seems like men with this....attraction, I'll say politely, make several assumptions about Asian (generally Chinese, Korean, or Japanese) women. They all seem to think that Asian women will be passive, quiet, easily dominated, and for some unfathomable reason, insatiable kink-meisters in the bedroom. I'm fairly certain these ideas were planted in their little minds after long hours of solitary 'Asian' porn watching and repeated viewings of the Vietnamese hooker scene in 'Full Metal Jacket'.
:rolleyes:

I'll say politely: I think this is a complete crock. Of course, there are some men out there who feel like you describe but Confuscious on a pogo stick, if a guy mentions having a physical attraction to Asian women you get painted as some drooling, socially inept pervert. And I hate being painted with this stereotypical brush.

Obviously you don't realize that I have degrees in Chinese language and Asian studies, have lived in Asia for 15+ years, have been married to the same Asian woman for 8 years and never cheated, speak at least passable Japanese, have a dual-citizen daughter, speak fluent Mandarin and can get by in at least one other Chinese dialect. Maybe that makes me obsessive, but ratty it doesn't make me a pervert.