View Full Version : This asshole is my stepfather, if you can believe it.
12-07-2002, 08:38 PM
One day, a girl named missmagic8ball, or MM8B for short, had to go to work. Since her mom suffers from insanity and decided to move onto an island 30 miles from town, seperated by WATER for fuck sakes...(MM8B has to take a boat to get to town in the winter) she unfortunetely had to rely on her mothers husband, dumb-pig-with-head-stuck-up-his-ass, or asshole for short, to give her a ride to town. Now, MM8B and asshole(I won't even dignify his name with a capital, he's so... assholish) had been fighting off and on all day. It started out when She was doing the dishes, and he placed all the dishes in the sink at once, while she was in the process of washing a knife, nearly causing herto cut off her fingers.
Then, she went into her room to read, and asshole storms in and tells her she can't close her door, and that she can read without the light on and use the paltry light from the window to read. when asked why , his exact words were "You know why, Jaimee(MM8B) Its because you want it open."
Since it takes roughly 25 minutes to gewt to her work from her "house", at about 3 15 she told asshole they hd to leave soon.
"When I'm done eating", he said. 15 minutes later, he was just finishing up eating his chips and melted cheez wiz. Then he went and had a shower. at about 15 to 4, he was still not ready.
"<asshole>(fake name used) can you please hurry up? I have to be at work at 4!"
what said he?
"Oh well. I guess you'l just be late then."
Then, when MM8B tried to explain to him that being late for work wasn't really something she liked to do, and that the last person couldn't leave till she got there, he told her again, "oh well."
" you know, you're not teaching me very good work ethic. Making me late for work because you're mad at me isn't very fair. My job is my responsibilty, and I really don't want to be fired."
"you don't even like working there, why should you care?"
"I kow I don't like working there. That doesn't mean I can be like, regardless of how I like it."
Finally, at 10-2-4, they left. He spent the ride to town trying to egg her on. Finally, when she couldn't take anymore, she yelled
"You know what, you can sure be an asshole sometimes. Leav me alone before I get myself in trouble." She said more words, but I can't remember what they were. she didn't swer once, though, or insult him anymore. Finally, they pulled up to her work.
"you know what? you're the reason poeple take birth control."
She narrowed her eyes, and said just as she was stepping out of his vehicle, said "well, you know what mel? you're the reason poeple contemplate suicide. You should take a look at my wrists sometimes." then, she went to work, went down stairs, and started to throw empty cardboard boxes around for a few minutes until she calmed down, and spent her shift bring her teeth at poeple inliew of smiling.
12-07-2002, 08:58 PM
Originally posted by Miss Magic8ball
...She narrowed her eyes, and said just as she was stepping out of his vehicle, said "well, you know what mel? you're the reason poeple contemplate suicide. You should take a look at my wrists sometimes." then, she went to work, went down stairs, and started to throw empty cardboard boxes around for a few minutes until she calmed down, and spent her shift bring her teeth at poeple inliew of smiling.
This cares the shit out of me. Sweetie, it gets better. I don't know how old you are but, all I can say is that your youth doesn't last forever. Soon you will be in charge of your own destiny. Just come here and post when you feel overwhelmed.
Duck Duck Goose
12-07-2002, 09:06 PM
What Honey said. Is there anyplace else you can live? Does he drink, too?
Does he work? Like have a job?
12-07-2002, 09:25 PM
Ys, he drinks. Yes, he has a job... hes the sales manager at emco... I think that he jut an asshole naturally Noone I know that has met him likes him besides his close freinds. My aunt, Gingerofthenorth, has met him, and she shares my sentiments.
I hate him so much. There is no other place for me to go. I've started to sleep with a dagger under my pillow again.
I've aapted though... I can live with it for the 2 years that It will take me to graduate. I just stay in my room the whole time.
12-07-2002, 09:36 PM
There are other places for you to go.
My house for one! (I'm in Raleigh, NC)
Email me if you need to, please.
12-07-2002, 09:38 PM
I live in yellowknife, Nt, Canada. thanks for the offer though... I don't think I could afford the plane ticket.
12-07-2002, 09:40 PM
I don't think this is a good idea. Yes, he's an asshole. However, he knows how to read, and so does your mother. It's too easy to track you here.
12-07-2002, 09:52 PM
Hang tough. Soon enough you'll be on your own. I didn't have it nearly as bad as you and the day I left was the best day of my life. Every year since then had gotten better and better.
I can tell that you have a good work ethic and that will take you far. The hardest thing to do is to do a good job at something that you hate.
I assure you that you will succeed and that is the best revenge of all.
12-07-2002, 10:06 PM
Yeah well, I get reminded often enough that I'l end up working at Macdonalds for the rest of my life... So when I'm rich and accomplished, It'l be great to rub it in thier faces.
12-07-2002, 11:07 PM
I hope things improve for you. Having bad parental units sucks, especially when it's someone whom the genetic parental unit picked. Trust me, things will get better with time. It's hard to stay strong in a bad family situation, but you can do it. Just remember that your mother will always be your mother, and that your stepfather may not always be your stepfather. You can choose to disown them when you're out on your own.
And also, please don't hurt yourself. I've had friends that SI'ed all the time, and it's the worst feeling to know someone you care about is causing themselves more pain because they're unhappy/they feel out of control of the situation. It's easier to learn how to deal with the bad emotions than to continue SI'ing and then having to learn how to stop.
::hugs MissMagic8Ball:: Stay safe, if only for the people you care about outside of your family.
12-07-2002, 11:13 PM
I have a couple concerns.
First, is your stepfather abusing you or your Mom in anyway besides being an asshole? If you feel the need to sleep with a knife under your pillow you should probably get someone, like the police, involved. If you think he might get violent act now.
Second, there is always somewhere to go. aenea would put you up and so would I if it came down to it. There are shelters that would probably take you in. In fact I bet that if you really need to get out of your house we could pick up the airplane ticket.
Third, I watched some of my family and friends stay with abusive guys. One of my friends ended up dead. My sister, who dated an abusive man, is still hiding from the guy 4 years later. Somehow he finds her unlisted number from time to time and my sister then moves to a different house and changes her number. The sooner you get out the better.
Last, you do not deserve to be treated like trash. If your step-Dad is just an asshole then you can live with it for a couple of years. Just never believe a thing he says. If he is abusive find help now.
I hope things work out well for you. If you want to talk email me.
12-07-2002, 11:16 PM
Oh SHIT that's bad!
12-08-2002, 01:01 AM
My Step Mum was a total bitch too. She used to rag on my mum, saying that she was a whore and a troll and that the smartest thing my dad ever did was to leave her. They used to lock the food in the garage and leave me with two minute noodles, cheese and bread. Since I lived in a little flat out the back seperate from the house, she used to lock the doors of the main house at night. If I needed to go to the toilet, I would have to crouch in the bushes at night.
I guess what I''m saying is that it does get better. After awhile, I finally got jack of living with this sort of abuse and moved in with an understanding friend. She let me live there free of charge, until I finished school and started a well payig job. Now I live in a nice home and have ceased all contact with my father and step mother. This is a little rash, but even though my father has sent me letters telling me that they''ve changed, I can''t risk going back and putting up with that abuse.
You can make your own family and support network. Even though it mightn''t feel like it, there are so many people out there that would be more than happy to help you through this difficult time. And I would also advise, if you can find alternative accomidation, to get out of there as fast as you can.
Please, please don''t hurt yourself. Don't let this awful person win. Sucess is the best revenge.
If you need to talk, feel free to email me.
12-08-2002, 01:44 AM
Holy crap! Rants in 3rd person are almost impossible for me to read this late at night! Anyway, MM8B, I wish you luck. I am reminded of a Jewish proverb- The best revenge is living well.
Then there is that other one, revenge is a dish best served cold...
Miss Magic8Ball, you have supportive friends here who care about you. It must hurt a lot to have a step-father that you can't respect.
If you are genuinely scared, talk to your mother or a teacher or the police. If he is just annoying the hell out of you, be aware that biological parents can do that too.
Meanwhile, "this too shall pass."
Hugs to you, my young friend!
12-08-2002, 02:19 AM
Originally posted by sleestak
First, is your stepfather abusing you or your Mom in anyway besides being an asshole? If you feel the need to sleep with a knife under your pillow you should probably get someone, like the police, involved. If you think he might get violent act now.I would second this, although with the remark about suicide, I wasn't sure just who MM8B intends to use the knife on. Either way, it sounds like someone should get involved to me.
As others have said, MM8B, there's always somewhere to go if you need it bad enough. Likewise, there's plenty of people here to talk to and tap for advice, understanding, tension relief, etc. My email's here as well, if you find yourself so inclined. Take care.
aenea, what a loving and kind soul you are! I will be spending Christmas in Cary and I will think of the generosity of your heart while I am there.
12-08-2002, 08:25 AM
Originally posted by Honey
This scares the shit out of me. Sweetie, it gets better. I don't know how old you are but, all I can say is that your youth doesn't last forever. Soon you will be in charge of your own destiny. Just come here and post when you feel overwhelmed.
This doesn't scare me as much as it makes me cringe. Don't know what the laws are in NT, MM8B, but down in this corner of the world this statement- regardless of the intent behind it- will get you a visit from me and a minimum of 5-7 days in a locked psych facility. If your stepfather was in an even more assholish state of mind, he and your mom could easily get you placed on a unit, and unfortunately they would have plenty of ammo to keep you there- more if, as Ginger points out, they were somehow able to find some of your posts here.
If you are truly feeling that overwhelmed, then run, don't walk, to your nearest school counselor and sit in their office until they give you help.. there's no sense in you thinking that suicide is your only option. However, I would caution you against throwing out statements like that to people who clearly don't have your best interests in mind.
12-08-2002, 11:45 AM
I'd have to argue with the school counseler advice. I had a major asshole as a stepfather as well when I was young, who it seemed, used to get off on making my life miserable. All I wanted to do was hide in my room to get away from him (which didn't really work since he would just come in and try to start shit with me in there). He would sit there and goad me, make nasty little rude comments, stare at me (I'm talking about a 5 minute straight unwavering stare) and if I dared to say anything in my defense (such as "it kinda makes me feel uncomforatable when you stare like that) I'd get yelled, no, more like, screamed at by my mother.
However, when I tried to talk to a school counseler about it, I came home that day to a shitstorm. Turns out he got right on the phone with my mother (who knew damn well what was going on, which the counsler also knew) telling her, practically word-for-word, what I had said. Essentially, he ratted me out. Funny, since I moved out, we get along fine now. Of course, now if he starts any shit, I can just leave.
MAGIC, I feel you. Does Ginger live close? Perhaps you could stay with her? For now I'd say steer clear from anyone who knows your mother and stepfather, or could possibly speak to them. Take advantage of the support you have here. Feel free to email me as well.
Duck Duck Goose
12-08-2002, 11:55 AM
Yellowknife may be a hellhole, but there IS help out there. Recognize any of these addresses?
YELLOWKNIFE WOMEN CENTRE
5020, 47th Tel.: (403) 873-9131
Yellowknife, Northwest Territories Fax: (403) 920-2676
The Yellowknife Women Centre is working to overcome poverty and to advocate (legal, social assistance and tenants rights) for women living in the North. The services offered at the Women Centre include a collective kitchen to improve nutrition, a drop-in where coffee and hot lunches are available, a depot for clothing and furniture. The Yellowknife Women Centre also provides a counselling service as well as support groups for survivors of sexual and physical abuse, parenting classes, a FAS group (Fetal Alcohol Syndrome). Furthermore, the Yellowknife Women Centre provides laundry facilities as well as showers for women and children.
WOMEN'S RESOURCE CENTRE HAYRIVER
P.O. Box 276 Tel.: (403) 874-3311
Hayriver, Northwest Territories Fax: (403) 874-3252
The Women's Resource Centre Hayriver was started by a small group of women who took physically abused women and their children into their own homes. The Centre offers counselling, shelter, a safe home for battered women, second stage housing, a 24-hour crisis line, and referrals. This centre also offers support and advocacy for women living on low incomes and their children.
WOMEN'S RESOURCE CENTRE, YELLOWKNIFE
5004 54th Tel.: (403) 920-2777
Yellowknife, Northwest Territories
The Women's Resource Centre in Yellowknife was created by women who saw a need for a shelter and resources for women and their children. The Centre offers help to women in their job search as well as helping them going back to school. It also offers support groups and a drop-in service. Please call them. It's not normal that you should have to sleep with a dagger under your pillow.
12-08-2002, 01:47 PM
Thank you all for your concern. She knows she has places to turn if she feels it is necessary. Her life is not in danger from herself or anyone else.
12-08-2002, 02:06 PM
Under the circumstances I think it best this thread be closed.
It's not nice to cry wolf. We will take appropriate measures.
your humble TubaDiva
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