Will oral sex change a man's mind?

[astro]

I have overheard more than one woman talking to another about why someone's husband or SO left them for another woman and one of the reasons given is that the man was now getting oral sex and never did before, as if this was sufficient explanation in and of itself. Is oral sex really this powerful for some men that it will make them leave their non-oral sex giving wives and girlfriends?

[Meatros]

It wouldn't be for me. I woudn't leave a relationship just because I wasn't getting head.

When I originally opened this thread, I thought the OP was going to be about women using head to get their way; which I would enthusiatically say YES, getting head will make me change my mind on most things.:D

[Q.E.D.]

Not for me. To be perfectly blunt, oral sex never did it for me. It's arousing, to be sure, but it's never gotten the job done by itself. If I had it in my mind to leave someone, the promise of oral sex would not be enough to sway me.

Just one man's opinion.

[tanookie]

I would think that is an insufficient reason to leave someone and was probably either the women's way of saying he's a complete cad ( kind of like when someone says that "she must give good head" as the only reason a guy would even be with certain girls) or the lack of oral sex was a symptom of the sexual dysfunction in the marriage.

[SlowMindThinking]

While it might be better to give than receive, I have to admit I am tired of a one way street. I would never leave my wife over it, but it does cause some stress that leads to the occasional fight.

Of course, it could just be that the man was tired of repeatedly hearing "I'm not doing that". No one wants to feel like a pervert because there is more in life than the missionary position. It might be that he used oral in a parting shot as an example of why his "new" woman was more exciting. However, I think tanookie is right. You can be sure that the man found the other woman more exciting, and probably not just sexually

[Giraffe]

I think it's just a rationalization to make the woman feel better. If he leaves you for something you don't want to do, then you can focus on the defensible reasons for why you didn't want to do it, thus proving that he's obviously just selfish and perverted. If he leaves you because he doesn't like you anymore or because you are a terrible lover, then it's a lot more personally devastating.

[H8_2_W8]

Maybe not so much the sex act itself, but the other woman's willingness or attitude or desire to do something for him that the wife won't do could be a factor.

[RTFirefly]

One certainly has to take into account the likelihood that the guy didn't know the 'other woman' would go down on him before he cheated on his wife.

[Ethilrist]

Isn't that what the attraction was that caused Hugh Grant to go to a hooker, rather than go to bed with Elizabeth Hurley?

reminds me of a joke:

Little Suzy walked in on her parents one night while they were having sex. The next morning, Suzy's mom talked to her about it and explained that that was where babies came from.

"Oh, I see." said Suzy. "How about last week, when I saw you and Daddy on the couch and you were kissing his privates?"

"Well," said Suzy's mom, "that's where jewelry comes from."

[H8_2_W8]

Well, Elizabeth Hurley's acting sucks, that's for sure. But, by judging her near-anorexia, she apparently doesn't swallow much of anything.

[merge]

No man will change his mind about a woman over not giving oral... as long as the sex is good...

[lieu]

That's completely false. We leave for the anal probes.

[Washte]

If a man is so shallow that oral sex is the clincher of a relationship, then perhaps.... good riddance.

As a woman, never has (any type of) sex been used as a tool to shange my partner's mind about something. IMHO, loving is meant for that, a demonstrative act of affection. Not a tool to be played with or taken lightly.

[lieu]

"Not a tool to be played with or taken lightly."
Interesting choice of words.

[Washte]

Originally posted by lieu "Not a tool to be played with or taken lightly."
Interesting choice of words. The pen(is) is mightier than the sword :D

[merge]

Originally posted by Washte
If a man is so shallow that oral sex is the clincher of a relationship, then perhaps.... good riddance.

As a woman, never has (any type of) sex been used as a tool to shange my partner's mind about something. IMHO, loving is meant for that, a demonstrative act of affection. Not a tool to be played with or taken lightly.

but the same can not be said for all women...
there are plenty of women that are just as shalow as men can be... and only give oral to get things...
or if a guy doesn't go down... they get rid of him...

[Meatros]

Originally posted by lieu
That's completely false. We leave for the anal probes.

Giving or recieving?

[rhinostylee]

Since all I and most men think about most of the time is sex, I think giving a man head would be an effective tool to get whatever you want. It certainly would change my mind in most situations.

This also depends on the man's status realative to the woman's, and also the quality of the blowjob. If you are the type of guy that can pull alot of ass, then a blowjob wouldn't change your mind on anything, or at least anything important, since you could easily get a blowjob from another woman. As far as quality, a girl that can't do a good job won't get what she wants from a man through oral sex.

My friends and I refer to the phenomenon of women that can give excellent blowjobs by saying that she gives "porno head."

[Legomancer]

I believe that oral sex won't change a man's mind.

However, I'm willing to be proven wrong.

[Washte]

Originally posted by merge
but the same can not be said for all women...
there are plenty of women that are just as shalow as men can be... and only give oral to get things...
or if a guy doesn't go down... they get rid of him... This is certainly true. I know too many women of this ilk. Reciprocity shouldn't be a given or expected (again IMHO). Those women who use sex to gain favours or to change minds really need to grow up. They end up doing more damage to themselves psychologically than they realise.

[Snooooopy]

I would be willing to give up my job as a telemarketer if I were to stumble upon a reliable source of oral sex.

[Oblong]

I read an interview in Playboy by that guy who wrote the Mars/Venus books. He estimated that a large portion, I don't remember his number, of marriages that end in divorce wouldn't end up that way if the woman would blow her husband on a regualr basis, a few times a week.

[merge]

although.... giving oral to women is probably the best thing in the world...
1. they love it.... so I love it
2. they become very grateful...

relationships do work better with oral... in my expiriances...
my last girlfreind and I did not have a good sex life... (no oral) she didn't do it to guys.. and she thought it was gross when a guy did it to her.. it made things dull...

my new girlfriend and I both give and recieve equally and frequently....

she is getting a ring soon...
; )

(thats not the only reason...)

[EVO95]

I wouldn't leave my SO if she wouldn't blow me. Well, not permanently anyway.

[verbenabeast]

well.... let me say this... Women controll all the true power in the universe.

[bouv]

Well, complicated issue.

My GF, for the most part, never gives me oral sex. It averages out to about twice a mon th, I think, and that's only because in the first couple of months it was about once a week...and we've been together for a year. Also, she has never driven me to orgasm from oral either.
On the other hand, I go down on her almost every time we have sex. While I can't say with 100% certainty that she has orgasmed, I am 99% sure I have driven her to orgasm quite a few times.

Am I upset that I hardly ever get oral? Yes. Am I going to leave her for it? No.

Now, let's say we break up and I go on the dating scene again, then I might not continue dating a girl if I'm not more sexually satisfied (which goes beyond just getting oral, BTW.)

[DougC]

- - - If oral sex is not important, then is sex at all important?
~

[Angel of the Lord]

I think it's important, but gods above...these are the kind of things that need to be TALKED about in a relationship, preferably before getting committed.

Frankly, I'd like to give the SO more oral. And have more sex. However, until we figure out a way to have *real* sex long distance...ain't happening.

[filmore]

I don't think that "a blowjob" is enough to get a man to leave, but an exciting sexual relationship could probably do it. If the original woman wasn't into oral sex, perhaps there was a lot else she wasn't into. But if the new woman is into oral, she's probably into a lot of other things as well.

I think some women think of sex like getting a massage--it feels nice, but it's no big deal if you don't get one for a few months. But for men, sex is a more basic desire like hunger. A hunger which needs to be satisfied a few times a week.

So ladies, if you're in a relationship where you only have sex a couple of times a month, I can almost guarantee your man is satisfying his needs in other ways. He's not necessarily getting oral satisfaction somewhere else however, Most likely he's taking matters into his own hands if you get my drift.

[Giraffe]

Originally posted by filmore
He's not necessarily getting oral satisfaction somewhere else however, Most likely he's taking matters into his own hands if you get my drift. He's forming a vigilante group?

[JRDelirious]

"A" blowjob would have to be really spectacular to get me to change my mind about important things. It may be enough for me to agree to not call the cops on a shoplifter, maybe, if she's really cute. And she returned the merchandise :D

OTOH, as mentioned before, a pattern of unsatisfying sex may well erode a relationship.

[handy]

If men could teach themselves to give themselves blowjobs more marriages would survive.

[merge]

Originally posted by handy
If men could teach themselves to give themselves blowjobs more marriages would survive.

lol....or would they get married at all???

is that something you can learn??

hmmmmmmm........;)

[astro]

Originally posted by Giraffe
He's forming a vigilante group?

You are surely the wittest of the even-toed ungulates!

:p

[China Guy]

Tom Robbins' Half Asleep in Frog Pajamas had a female character with this line:

Show me a woman that doesn't give head, and I'll show you a husband I can steal.

[Giraffe]

Take that, camels!

:D

[Sublight]

It doesn't change our minds, but it can certainly blank them for a while. Kind of like that Jedi trick.

[Monstre]

Originally posted by handy
If men could teach themselves to give themselves blowjobs more marriages would survive.

I think that's less a matter of education and more a matter of flexibility...

After all, men wouldn't need girlfriends in that case. ;)

[Angel of the Lord]

Random question:

Why *are* blowjobs such a big deal?

I mean, okay, I can see some need for going down on a chick--after all, some chicks *can't* climax from intercourse. But guys...guys get off from vaginal. And there are lots of different ways to do it--even/especially female-superior, during which the female, not the male, controls things (another aspect of blowjobs). So...why all the hub-bub?

(This isn't to say I don't enjoy GIVING them--there's nothing better than knowing "I made him make that funny face!" But I just don't understand why blowjobs are so special.)

[bouv]

Originally posted by Angel of the Lord
Random question:

Why *are* blowjobs such a big deal?

I mean, okay, I can see some need for going down on a chick--after all, some chicks *can't* climax from intercourse. But guys...guys get off from vaginal. And there are lots of different ways to do it--even/especially female-superior, during which the female, not the male, controls things (another aspect of blowjobs). So...why all the hub-bub?

(This isn't to say I don't enjoy GIVING them--there's nothing better than knowing "I made him make that funny face!" But I just don't understand why blowjobs are so special.)

It's not just that we like to get off, a "blowjob" just feels different. Yeah, regular sex is nice, but occaisionally we like to mix it up a little. Sure, I like Italian food, but I like a little Mexican and Chinese every now and then

There's probably some more too, something Freudian, with moms or something. There's ALWAYS something Freudian.

[Manduck]

There is NOTHING that feels like a good blowjob! I can't even describe it.

[MeanJoe]

Um... I'll get tossed out of here for this but:

First relationship involving sex and my SO would not perform oral to completion. Just foreplay to get things pointing in the proper direction for other activities. I was okay with this, trying to be a gentleman about it and not pushing the issue.

Then after that relationship ended, for entirely unrelated reasons, I got my first complete blow-job and well...

I'm not -exactly- saying it would be reason to leave a relationship but it would be highly unlikely I'd be in a relationship without it.

Mean "Returns the favor!" Joe

[Washte]

Why *are* blowjobs such a big deal? They are very special indeed.

There are myriad reasons why - from psychological to sensual.
*Trust is a major part of it.
*Being able to relax enough to truly enjoy it - and perhaps actually climax (some men can't though oral alone).
*Remember - men are visual. Being able to watch a woman perform on him is very stimulating.
*It feels bloody fantastic (or so I've been told ;))

Also if a woman enjoys giving, it can be the biggest turn on for her as well.

[EhhMon]

Depends on what kind of blow job you get.......

Let me tell you, there are blow jobs, and there are BLOW JOBS, not the kind that will make you slap your MAMA, but the kind that will make you leave your WIFE!!!!

[DougC]

There is NOTHING that feels like a good headjob! I can't even describe it.
- - - I second that emotion. It feels fantastic, and there simply isn't anything else even remotely similar. Is it fun for the woman? I don't care, it's not for her. It's all about being willing to do something just because of how good it makes the other person feel. And about taking turns, of course.
----------
Important Consumer Information: Where I come from, a "head job" is suction, and a "blow job" is moistening with blowing. Like, alternately, for that cold feeling of, I don't know, something that's supposed to be really sexy or something. "Blow jobs" do nothing for me, "head jobs" are what I refuse to live without.
---------
.
If men could teach themselves to give themselves blowjobs more marriages would survive.
.
-And a guy can't do it properly to himself, silly! The tongue's gotta rub on the underside.
~

[Mangetout]

Originally posted by Washte
The pen(is) is mightier than the sword :D Only if the sword is very blunt, or the penis is very large.



...You were talking about fighting duels, weren't you?

[Oblong]

Question: Does it only become a blow job when done to completion? The word "Job" to me means that there should be a goal or end result, otherwise it's just oral sex. Make sense?

Either way, every encounter begins with the hope that I'll get oral sex. Don't always do obviously but that just makes it better for when I do. As much as it pains me to say it, less is more. If I got one every day or even 3 times a week, it'd get boring.

I was going to describe the ideal blowjob but this isn't Penthouse Forum.

The key to enjoying them is to relax. Ladies, make your man at leastthink you enjoy doing it and that you want nothing more than for him to feel at his best for the next 10-15 minutes.

[Gorgon Heap]

I cannot add anything that has not already been said, but I do have to tell you ...



I am really missing my wife right now.

[Mr. Blue Sky]

Will oral sex change a man's mind?

yes, yes, yes, Yes, Yes, YEs, YEs, YES, YES, YES, YES.........no.

:D

[handy]

"Question: Does it only become a blow job when done to completion? "

That is a great line to give the wifey. 'Oh, I didn't have oral sex with her because it wasn't done to completion, so I've been faithful' :-)

[Sejal_Traurig]

I admit.. There is one woman from my past who, were she to offer oral, could change my mind about a great many things..

I believe someone above referred to it as "Porn Star Head"

[Oblong]

"Question: Does it only become a blow job when done to completion? "

That is a great line to give the wifey. 'Oh, I didn't have oral sex with her because it wasn't done to completion, so I've been faithful' :-)



I'm comparing the terms Oral Sex and blowjob. To me, it's only a blowjob if taken to completion. Otherwise, it's Oral Sex. If during foreplay I get a little oral sex to "Warm up", but we have intercourse, I don't consider that "getting a blowjob".

It's still nice obviously, just I wouldn't use taht term.

I like threads about oral sex.

[Goofus]

When I started reading this thread, I was interested. Then I got more interested, then VERY interested, then suddenly I lost interest.

[Tomcat]

Yes. If a blowjob meant nothing, then there wouldn't be any reason NOT to do it.

I was in a very intense relationship that gave blowjobs in the beginning, but then left me high and dry. She loved me going down on her, but she never reciprocated. I went through a tough time wondering if lack of oral sex was worth giving up a relationship, and I determined, for myself, that that is true. It feels entirely too good for me to go without for the rest of my life. I am not going to be in a relationship where I only hope that I'll get something that is A) normal, B) feels like heaven on earth, but is never given.

That is it for me. It feels SO GOOD that going without it for 50 years (potentially) seems insane. Especially when I was doing it to her. How could she expect to get that kind of wonderful feeling but not return it?

In my experience, good sex did not always equal a good relationship, but bad sex most definitely equalled a bad relationship.

This past girl led to a joke: What do manipulative bitches and carpentry floor-layers have in common? They both say "Lay 'em right the first time and you can walk on them for years." THANK GOD I got out of that hell.

I am extremely happy to say that I learned my lesson and am 6 years into a great marriage with the best blowjob giver I have ever met (as well as many other great things to say about her)!

-Tcat

[Oblong]

Someone should market a sex video for couples and married people called "Porn Star Head".

I've never heard the term before but I certainly will introduce it to my wife. Some internet browsing will show her what it is. Just another twist to things.
Save it for special occasions.

Blow Jobs in the shower are wonderful too but it's hard to finish because of the heat and the fact I'm standing. But the wife loves them because she can just "stand, rinse" No repeat though.

[Washte]

Porn Star BJ's are stupid. All that slobbering, and big puppy dog eyes and.... oh god...

They are just ridiculous.

Now, if a woman were really into it and getting off with it as much as he was, well.... that's another story.

It should be good for both parties involved. If she is doing it just for the sake of shutting up his begging, of bloody course it's not going to be as good as it could be.... slurp slurp... stroke stroke... oh baby oh baby....

Yeah. Does it for me :rolleyes:

If you're gonna do it. Do it right.

[handy]

I've seen a topic here on the board from some guy who said he got married & wondered what happened to the Bj's after marriage.

[Rubystreak]

I hope this question isn't too entirely beyond the pale, but... how many men have tasted their own semen? Because if you haven't, and called it good, how can you expect someone else to not only taste it but SWALLOW it on a fairly regular basis? The flavor of said fluid varies from guy to guy, but some are really biohazard, and how do you tell someone you love such a thing? Answer: you don't. You just find ways to avoid...

Which leads to another risque query: would you consider it a satisfactory blowjob if, at the moment of ejaculation, she let you come all over her, instead of just in her mouth? Because in my limited experience viewing Porn Star Head, that's exactly what they do. They NEVER swallow b/c then, we'd all miss The Money Shot. So, how 'bout it, all you cats that demand PSH? Would you compromise on the Money Shot and call THAT good?

[Larry Mudd]

As Dr. Einstein remarked to the elder Brewster in Arsenic and Old Lace, "When you make up your mind, you lose your head."

I guess that cuts both ways for some fellas.

[Shakes]

I'm not -exactly- saying it would be reason to leave a relationship but it would be highly unlikely I'd be in a relationship without it.

I have to agree with this myself. Come to think of it I've never been in a LTR with a woman that didn't suck pipe.

I also have to say that a woman going down, was never a deciding factor for me, but it surely didn't hurt either.

[Tomcat]

Wait, I don't think I saw this before...How could I have not posted it?

Q: Why was the bride smiling while walking down the aisle?
A: She knew she'd never have to give head again!

-Tcat

[Texican]

Originally posted by Rubystreak
I hope this question isn't too entirely beyond the pale, but... how many men have tasted their own semen? Because if you haven't, and called it good, how can you expect someone else to not only taste it but SWALLOW it on a fairly regular basis? The flavor of said fluid varies from guy to guy, but some are really biohazard, and how do you tell someone you love such a thing? Answer: you don't. You just find ways to avoid...

Which leads to another risque query: would you consider it a satisfactory blowjob if, at the moment of ejaculation, she let you come all over her, instead of just in her mouth? Because in my limited experience viewing Porn Star Head, that's exactly what they do. They NEVER swallow b/c then, we'd all miss The Money Shot. So, how 'bout it, all you cats that demand PSH? Would you compromise on the Money Shot and call THAT good?

Absolutely!! That way is fun too. I think the biggest thing to remember ladies is that it makes us feel bad when just as soon as we orgasm, you jump up and run to the bathroom, spit, brush your teeth, gargle, etc... Lots of girls are ok with getting it in the mouth but just cant bring themselves to swallow. Then do the porn star method of opening your mouth and looking sexy at him while you let it run out or something. If you are going to let him cum on you instead, don't forget to close your eyes!!!

[Urban Ranger]

Originally posted by merge
although.... giving oral to women is probably the best thing in the world...
1. they love it.... so I love it
2. they become very grateful...

::thumbs up::

[Washte]

Originally posted by Rubystreak
I hope this question isn't too entirely beyond the pale, but... how many men have tasted their own semen? Because if you haven't, and called it good, how can you expect someone else to not only taste it but SWALLOW it on a fairly regular basis? The flavor of said fluid varies from guy to guy, but some are really biohazard, and how do you tell someone you love such a thing? Answer: you don't. You just find ways to avoid...

Which leads to another risque query: would you consider it a satisfactory blowjob if, at the moment of ejaculation, she let you come all over her, instead of just in her mouth? Because in my limited experience viewing Porn Star Head, that's exactly what they do. They NEVER swallow b/c then, we'd all miss The Money Shot. So, how 'bout it, all you cats that demand PSH? Would you compromise on the Money Shot and call THAT good?Flavour: yes, it does vary from person to person, but also is dependent upon what they've been eating and drinking (http://www.celebrateintimacy.com/semen.html). This will have a stong influence on semen taste. If you want to secretly improve his taste, get him to eat citrus fruit - pineapple, oranges, etc. This will make it sweeter. If you feel this is too fiddly, then it's up to you to find a way to dispose of the load on your own without making him feel bad or ruining the moment. There are even produsts you can buy to improve the flavour, but it may not be available in all areas (try Google if nowt else).

As for a pearl necklace or swallowing.... It is very disheartening to have the gal jump up and run to spit and gargle. Why not do something more tasteful such as have a tissue nearby (if you must)? When it actually comes to climax, in order to cum all over her, the fella has to finish himself off (usually), which defeats the oral purpose, unless he asks to give you a pearl necklace or cum elsewhere.

[SlowMindThinking]

My wife refuses to give blowjobs. I haven't had one for four years, which I know because the last one was when she felt bad for the way she treated me before I left for a week long conference. I try to go down on her at least once a week. No, I have no idea what I taste like, although I have kissed her afterwards, in decades past.

Yes, I am thinking of leaving her. First, I resent not having a normal, healthy sex life. (We only get to use two positions, also.) Second, and most important, I feel you someone who loves you gets genuine pleasure from giving their loved one pleasure. That is why I am quite willing to go down, despite the total lack of reciprocation.

[curiouschick]

Hey Oblong- maybe if you said what an ideal "blowjob" was then men woudl get more that are better.

[handy]

"Hey Oblong- maybe if you said what an ideal "blowjob" was then men woudl get more that are better."

I heard a rumor that gay men give the best ones. Of course, gay men never really reply to these topics.

[curiouschick]

Yeah...but that doesn't help....or even offer tips

[Enderw24]

Originally posted by Gorgon Heap
I cannot add anything that has not already been said, but I do have to tell you ...



I am really missing my wife right now.
Excercising the pelvic muscles will really help to increase the accuracy of your aim.

[OpalCat]

I haven't had sex in nearly a year. The medication I'm on makes the idea of sex repugnant to me. Back in the day, however, I would give blow jobs. I don't like the taste, however, and so I prefer to do them as foreplay, then climb on, rather than finishing it that way. The giving the blow job part can be fun and a turn on. Getting a mouthful of foul slime pretty much kills it for me right there. I always have to fight to not gag. I always swallowed, though, because spitting seemed impractical. Gah it's disgusting though. Bleah.

As for terminology, to me "blow job" "head" "head job" and "oral sex" all mean the same thing [when referring to a guy--obviously oral sex means something else when referring to a girl] and I've never heard of anyone making a distinction before.

[Shame's Joys]

This thread is a good example of how people say "oral sex" when what they really mean is fellatio. As if the default meaning of "oral sex" is limited to fellatio. Hel-LO?! Have you all forgotten that fellatio is only half of the meaning of oral sex? When astro chose this thread title, were you thinking that fellatio is the only kind of "oral sex" there is?

I just see so many articles and discussions nowadays about "Oral Sex" but all people think it means is fellatio. I demand equal time for cunnilingus! If you're going to talk about "Oral Sex," you should make cunnilingus an equal part of the discussion. Otherwise, just be specific and say "fellatio" or "blowjob" or "sucking cock" so that people hoping for a discussion that includes cunnilingus aren't misled!
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=160106

[Buffalodude]

Oral sex is no doubt the most powerful act known to man

[The Mermaid]

Ok you asked for tips. Not to be immodest, but I have been told my technique as follows is very nice.

FTR I don't find the taste objectional but if you do then the solution is to not let the stuff land on the taste buds. In other words, at the moment of release leave one hand on the base of the penis and put your other hand on his ass and pull him in close and deep throat. This leaves you in control and gets it past the gag reflex and taste buds.

Simple, erotic and sweet as pie. Mmmmm pie.

[Evil Captor]

Originally posted by Giraffe
He's forming a vigilante group?

Posse. It's called posse. As opposed to pussy.
:eek:

[Evil Captor]

I tend to side with the "symptomatic of the quality of the relationship" dealie.

One thing, though, before anyone leaves their SO over oral sex (whichever set of genitals is involved) first try talking about it. Might be that you can work out a deal in which everybody wins.)

I personally enjoy giving head to my wife -- I mean, it REALLY turns me on. She likes giving head to me, too, though she doesn't like to swallow, which doesn't bother me. So it's never really been a big deal for either of us. Reading some of these posts, I feel like I've dodge a bullet and didn't even know it.

[OpalCat]

Originally posted by Shame's Joys
This thread is a good example of how people say "oral sex" when what they really mean is fellatio. As if the default meaning of "oral sex" is limited to fellatio. Hel-LO?! Have you all forgotten that fellatio is only half of the meaning of oral sex? When astro chose this thread title, were you thinking that fellatio is the only kind of "oral sex" there is?

Uh... no... but maybe we figured out that if you are talking about what you're doing to a GUY most people would be bright enough to figure out which one you meant.

[OpalCat]

Originally posted by The Mermaid
FTR I don't find the taste objectional but if you do then the solution is to not let the stuff land on the taste buds. In other words, at the moment of release leave one hand on the base of the penis and put your other hand on his ass and pull him in close and deep throat. This leaves you in control and gets it past the gag reflex and taste buds.

Simple, erotic and sweet as pie. Mmmmm pie.

No. I have a VERY sensitive gag reflex and anything even CLOSE to deep throat would cause my to convulse and gag, and possibly throw up. I've tried the "back of the mouth" thing before and it was even worse, because I gagged and the stuff ended up in my mouth for even longer. Sorry guys, but I don't do the "cum in the mouth" thing anymore.

[Bluegreen_isis]

I am going to get slaughtered by the females here (not all of them but a large percentage albiet

A real woman not only gives good head but swallows too.

Suck it up ladies, its only about a teaspoon.

I don't personally know if a lack of blowjobs causes a man to leave (never had the problem) but I must say a good blowjob can go a long way. I have had a man move 1000+ miles to live with me to recieve my regular oral pleasure (well I am sure its not the only reason, probably my excellent cooking too - after all its all about food and sex)

I don't think its only BJs though, that are the deciding factor in these cases, women today need to be more rounded intellectually. I think that men (maybe its just me, again) are looking for more learned women, women who are interested in more than makeup and Sex In The City.

Somewhere here someone said that a good excuse to his wife would be that its not a blowjob b/c it was never completed....
sounds very Clintonesque to me....

Anyway, thats my two-bits .... now I wonder if any of it made a lick of sense.

{BGI}

[Maastricht]

The question has been raised a few times in this thread by curious women: "which tecniques make fellatio (so) good or bad?"

If you have been, like me, too embarrassed to buy some good instructional book, maybe the following link (non-pornographic, non-smutty, totally respectful to all sexes, and free of charge etc etc) offers some positive practical advice and a good bibliography, too.

http://www.sexuality.org/l/incoming/afell.html

(Moderators, if i'm being out of line by providing this link, then please correct me)

[SlowMindThinking]

Bluegreen_isis, you are my dream woman. And for me, really, the swallowing thing would just icing on the cake.

[OpalCat]

Originally posted by Bluegreen_isis
A real woman not only gives good head but swallows too.

Suck it up ladies, its only about a teaspoon.

Well I used to be a real woman, until I figured out that I didn't have to totally sacrifice my own enjoyment to please a man. I enjoy the giving head part, but the swallowing (indeed, the whole cum-in-the-mouth thing) totally RUINS it for me. I'm happy for you that you can deal with it, but for me, it totally destroys the sexual feeling, any pleasure, and makes me feel ill. Apparently this makes me less than a real woman :rolleyes: and to be a real woman I need to completely ignore my own pleasure in favor of the All Important Superior Male and his Absolute Need To Cum In A Particular Place.

[CuriousCanuck]

Hey Maastricht:

I used to live across the border in Liege (Luik) and I must say I enjoyed my days there in your wonderful cafes and on the Mississippi (Is that still around?) :) :) :)

[Bluegreen_isis]

OPalCat...

I guess I just don't consider it "sacrificing my enjoyment", I know it turns my man on and in exchange I get turned on knowing I am pleasing him, because thats what sex is all about, not self-gratification but MUTUAL-gratification.

Second, you think men get a taste of "heaven" when they go down on a woman? Whats worse, a couple of seconds to swallow or a buncha minutes with your whole face in something not-so-heavenly.
Trust me, I have been on THAT side too, and though SOME men "like" the taste, NOT all women taste good.


"I need to completely ignore my own pleasure in favor of the All Important Superior Male and his Absolute Need To Cum In A Particular Place"???!!!

WTF!
How about men ignoring thier own pleasure in favor of the All Powerful Female and Her Need To Have Some Guys Face In Her Nasty"

Whats right about that.

Anywho, whatever....

[CheapBastid]

Originally posted by Rubystreak
I hope this question isn't too entirely beyond the pale, but... how many men have tasted their own semen? Because if you haven't, and called it good, how can you expect someone else to not only taste it but SWALLOW it on a fairly regular basis? The flavor of said fluid varies from guy to guy, but some are really biohazard, and how do you tell someone you love such a thing? Answer: you don't. You just find ways to avoid...Have you ever tasted your own vaginal secretions? Because if you haven't, and called it good, how can you expect someone else to not only taste them, but act as if they RELISH the experience on a fairly regular basis? The flavor of said fluids varies from girl to girl, but some are really fishtastic, and how do you tell someone you love such a thing? Answer: you don't. You just find ways to avoid...

FYI, I personally dearly love to Yodel in the Canyon and all the wonderful juices that result. Just rephrasing for effect.

[Bluegreen_isis]

HERE HERE CheapBastid!!!!!

[Superdude]

Originally posted by EhhMon
Depends on what kind of blow job you get.......

Let me tell you, there are blow jobs, and there are BLOW JOBS, not the kind that will make you slap your MAMA, but the kind that will make you leave your WIFE!!!!


By far, the BEST idiom I have ever heard was from a friend of mine, regarding his wife. His wife is one of my best friends in the world. His comment was that she was so talented, "you have to pull the sheets out of the crack in your ass afterwards."

[OpalCat]

Originally posted by Bluegreen_isis
I guess I just don't consider it "sacrificing my enjoyment", I know it turns my man on and in exchange I get turned on knowing I am pleasing him, because thats what sex is all about, not self-gratification but MUTUAL-gratification.

See, for you it obviously doesn't gross you out. The mutual gratification is during the process--I just don't like him to cum in my mouth. Sorry, but that's the way it is. I used to do it anyway, but then I decided that my needs were important, too.

Second, you think men get a taste of "heaven" when they go down on a woman? Whats worse, a couple of seconds to swallow or a buncha minutes with your whole face in something not-so-heavenly.
Trust me, I have been on THAT side too, and though SOME men "like" the taste, NOT all women taste good.

No, but if they don't like it, they don't have to do it and it doesn't really MATTER to me.

WTF!
How about men ignoring thier own pleasure in favor of the All Powerful Female and Her Need To Have Some Guys Face In Her Nasty"


The difference here is that I don't think that a guy is not "a real man" if he doesn't want to go down on me. You're the one getting judgemental here, not me. If a guy doesn't like it, that is fine with me. I don't think any less of him for it. YOU on the other hand, think that I'm not a "real woman" because I won't let a guy cum in my mouth. :rolleyes:

[OpalCat]

Originally posted by CheapBastid
Have you ever tasted your own vaginal secretions? Because if you haven't, and called it good, how can you expect someone else to not only taste them, but act as if they RELISH the experience on a fairly regular basis?[/sub]

I have. Many, many times.

[OxyMoron]

Originally posted by handy
I heard a rumor that gay men give the best ones. Of course, gay men never really reply to these topics. Hum, well, this'll be an interesting experiment.

See, part of the reason we (okay, I) don't answer these threads very often is that once a gay guy chimes in, the discussion often turns to giving blowjobs in addition to getting blowjobs. And a lot of straight guys get ished out by listening to a guy talk about how much he likes sucking dick.

[pauses for effect]

Seewhutimean?

Oh, well, in for a penny...

I can't find my cites now, but there is at least some evidence that a higher percentage of gay men than straight women enjoy giving head. That may be because you know the equipment - you have the same set. (Different manufacturer, but it's all compatible.) (would that computers worked that way...)

And there's stigma. I've read about, but never encountered, out gay guys who flat won't give head out of some fear for their masculinity - seems to be a thing of the past. But for some women, unfortunately, oral sex may always be degrading. There's also the sheer difference in size between men and women. I don't know how much difference there might be in the throat cavity, but even a half centimeter could make things a lot more comfortable. Perhaps equally importantly, a guy giving head is likely to be the same size (or bigger) than the guy he's blowing, whereas women may feel more dominated and vulnerable (and not in a good way).

OK, back to the OP. I know I wouldn't leave a guy in the (less likely) event he refused to blow me, and I agree with those who suspect that's not the full issue. Strikes me that a lack of blowjobs is more a symptom than a disease.

[3trew]

Wow. No such thing as too much information in the thread, and I have a post to follow that kind of ties in with what I've been thinking.

NB: once upon a time, earlier today, the bottle of Vanilla Stoli was full, and now it's not, so if I'm incoherent or violate any rules I'd just like to plead drunk.

I've had head from (pardon the diminutives but it's easier to type) a bunch of girls and one boy.

With the girls it's been nice, sometimes very nice, sometimes amazing.

With the boy, it's never been less than "OH MY FREAKIN' GAWD!!".

In an ideal world, he'd hold seminars and teach them. Yes, I'd volunteer to help out in the class.

On the other hand, he's never been able to get me all the way there, and the ladies have managed that quite nicely.

That said, oral sex wouldn't make me leave a solid relationship. Not even really really good oral. When I'm in a committed relationship, I'm not even open to the possibility of any kind of sexual contact with anybody other than my partner (unless it's something we've thoroughly discussed and decided to share, a threesome or a swing type thing).

It's not the cause, it might be a symptom.

It could also, as has been mentioned above, be a way of dealing with what happened for the dumpee. For a quick lesson in how this works, find a really stupid straight guy (think Joey from "Friends", only not sanitized for TV) and watch him hit on incredibly hot women. Check out how long it takes him to conclude that the ones who don't respond are lesbians. For additional fun, do this in the company of a lesbian.

Oh, and as far as the whole taste thing goes, that's why God invented flavoured condoms, people. Not a bad idea these days anyway.

[xenothrope]

<insert bill clinton joke here>

Now that thats out of the way. It all depends on the guy. Sex can be VERY important to some, not so important to others. I hightly doubt oral sex alone can make a man leave his wife. (At least any one who I would call a TRUE man)

I believe that it would be a number of factors that caused the said male to leave his wife. First and foremost the basis to any good relationship (IMHO) is communication and honesty. Perhaps there was a loss of communication or a betrayal of honesty? I do not know and do not attempt to guess.

However, had the entire relationship (and marrage) been based on sex, then loosing the relationship by sex is highly likely.

-x out

[Oblong]

I noticed the women I've been with would only do it once. I figured out that it was probably because I was too big for them and their mouth got stretched out too much.

:D

just joking but someone had to say it

[handy]

Yeah, I know that, that's why your handle is 'Oblong' :-)