Re: "Did astronaut Neil Armstrong muff his historic "one small step" line?"

[Jiminy]

In regards to Mr. C.'s answer to the "one small step for (a) man" (http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a3_362.html) question, the famous Armstrong line was actually supposed to be a haiku except Neil just didn't say the last line for some unknown reason.

Oh, and, by the way, this is my first post

[samclem]

Jiminy. You get an A+ for giving a link to Cecil's column. That puts you in the top 20% of first-time posters.

Now, if you expect to keep up your record, you need to post a cite for your assertion. Something we can sink our teeth into, and feast on your blood..... Er, what we need is where you got your info.

Again, welcome.

[bibliophage]

I'm having a hard time imagining what the missing last line was supposed to be. Could it be something like...

That's one small step for
a man, one giant leap for
mankind; now Buzz off.

[friedo]

How about

One small step for man,
One giant leap for mankind,
Screw the damn Ruskies!

[zut]

Perhaps it's:

One small step for man,
One giant leap for mankind
Luck, Mister Gorsky!

Yes? (http://www.snopes.com/quotes/mrgorsky.htm )

[Chronos]

Except that it still wouldn't have been a haiku, even if he had put in extra syllables. A haiku, contrary to popular belief, does not need to have any specific number of syllables, but it does need to be about a natural subject.

[C K Dexter Haven]

One small step for man,
One giant leap for mankind,
One burger with fries, please.


... it's all about "one".

[leander]

Originally posted by Chronos
Except that it still wouldn't have been a haiku, even if he had put in extra syllables. A haiku, contrary to popular belief, does not need to have any specific number of syllables, but it does need to be about a natural subject. Um, cite please?

[John W. Kennedy]

He's wrong about the syllables. A haiku not only must have 17 syllables, it must scan 5/7/5. (Virtually all English "haiku" fail utterly to scan; the rhythms of the English language fight all syllabically scanned verse.)

In syllabic verse,
Flat, staccato sound is best --
English is not so.

He is right about the subject matter; a proper haiku should, at the least, have a word that signals one of the seasons. However, that rule was only added in 1892, when the word haiku was invented. Before that, a 5/7/5 poem was known as a hokku and could have any subject. The new word was invented because, strictly speaking, a hokku was supposed to be only the starting point of a longer poem, but many poets had been writing them alone.

Confused? See HAIKU for PEOPLE (http://www.toyomasu.com/haiku/)

Anyway, since neither haiku nor hokku is a correct name for a standalone 5/7/5 poem that does not concern itself with Nature, but there are plenty of classical Japanese poems that fit that description, both names are used, even though they're technically incorrect.

[leander]

Thanks for the info, John. It didn't sound right, but frankly I hadn't thought about haiku for ages.

[elelle]

One small step for man,
One giant leap for mankind,
This moon becomes us.

Thought I'd give it a go. Nice link, John W.