Jingle Bells, Batman smells

[Flypsyde]

Hey, rasta, there's always hope, dammit! Just turn to the all-embracing light of state government.

I grew up in the 80's, and we were still singing it in Springfield then.

------------------
"Bodie, I noticed you stopped stuttering."
"I've been giving myself shock treatments."
"Up the voltage."
-Real Genius

[Missy2U]

We sang it in Palos Park in the 70's. Yes, that's in Illinois too.

[dwtno]

I happened to catch an episode of the animated Batman series once and almost choked when the Joker broke out in song with that little ditty! The emphasis was on the last line, because he did, in fact, "got away" (sic).

[Dirty Devil]

I grew up in the 70's in San Francisco, and I remember it exactly as in the OP. And we thought we were so cool and clever.

[Pixoid]

Eighties, NY:

Jingle Bells, Batman smells
Robin laid an egg.
Batmobile lost its wheels
And Joker got away. (Hey!)

Batman's in the kitchen,
Robin's in the hall.
Joker's in the bathroom,
pissing on the wall.

[Wicked Blue]

Pixoid! I forgot all about that one! LOL

[Capt. Spaulding]

I grew up in St. Louis in the '70s and we always sang it exactly as in the OP.

Now, does anyone remember the complete lyrics to "On Top of Spaghetti" or "The Worms Crawl In.."?

[AWB]

We sang it as in the OP in Bumf**k Colorado 25-30 years ago.

It does sound like some mass medium distributed the song. WAG: Mad Magazine.

[torq]

In the 70s in Missouri it was "Batmobile BROKE a wheel". But other than that, pretty much the same. I don't remember any words after the Joker got away (hey!), though.

And the gopher guts song I learned was "Great green gobs of greasy grimy gopher guts/swimming in a pool of blood." Other verses had "Mutilated monkey meat" or "paralyzed porpoise pus" doing the same thing.

[neuro-trash grrrl]

I also learned Pixoid's version, with second verse. But does anyone remember this one?

Jingle bells, caca smells
Grandma's got a gun
Something something something something
Now look at them run.

Or something like that.

It topped the kindergarten hit-parade for a while over here. Did anyone else learn it, or was it just a New Mexico thing?

------------------
"That's entertainment!" —Vlad the Impaler

[kellibelli]

I heard it in New Brunswick in the mid 70's just like the op...
and its:
Great big globs of greasy grimy gopher guts,
Mutilated monkey meat,
dirty little birdy feet,
deepfried eyeballs,melting in a bowl of pus, and i forgot my spoon!
So I'll use a straw...<slurp>

[GuanoLad]

Well, the fact that I knew it at my school, and this is a tiny fishing village on the east coast of the South Island of New Zealand we're talking about, says a lot about how widely distributed it got.

------------------
-PIGEONMAN-
Hero For A New Millennium!

The Legend Of PigeonMan (http://www.hotkey.net.au/~guanolad/pigeonman/) - updates every Wed & Sat. If I can be bothered.

[Wicked Blue]

My husband remembers it this way:
Jingle Bells, Batman smells
Robin laid an egg,
He picks his nose with Cheerios
And eats it every day
Hey!

[Jois]

Pixoid's version, the 70s and Texas. We loved that one!

[OpalCat]

I heard it just like in the OP, growing up in Tucson AZ.

And it's Great Green Globs of greasy grimy gopher guts
Mutilated monkey meat
bloody little birdy feet
All just sitting in the middle of the street
and me without my spoon
(but I've got a straw!)

------------------
--
Teeming Millions: http://fathom.org/teemingmillions
"Meat flaps, yellow!" - DrainBead, naked co-ed Twister chat
O p a l C a t
www.opalcat.com (http://www.opalcat.com)

[elelle]

I remember singing the Batman carol in California, and it was the Penguin that got away.

Learned later in NY:

Great green gobs of
Greasy grimy gopher guts
Chopped up birdie's feet
Mutilated monkey meat
French-fried eyeballs
Swimming in a pool of blood
I fergot my straw!
How sweet it iiissssss...

And this is a new one, sung sweetly by a friend's angelic looking children at a Christmas party:

Joy to the world!
The teacher's dead
We barbequed her head!
What happened to her boooodddyyyy?
We flushed it down the pooootttttyyy...
And watched it go round & round
And watched it go round & round
And watched it go rooouuunnndd
And round and round!

They learned it in school. Yikes!

[Spud]

You guys are all so close, but it is:

Great big gobs of
Greasy grimy gopher guts
Little birdie's dirty feet
Mutilated monkey meat
Two big eyeballs
Floating in a glass of milk
Get it at your neighborhood store
Without a strawwwww!

Everyone knows that.

[bunny]

I am from Canada and we sang it when I grew up. They are the songs that are past on to annoy all adults.
As a teacher I can say they still sing them and it does annoy you after awhile.

------------------
All we really needed to know we learned in Kindergarden

[Sylence]

I don't know if this is the one you were thinking of, Neuro, but. . .

Jingle bells, cockle shells
Grandma's got a gun
She shot gramps in the underwear
In 1991


-- Sylence

------------------
I don't have an evil side. Just a really, really apathetic one.

[neuro-trash grrrl]

Perhaps. But that's okay, I've got another one:

Deck the halls with gasoline, fa la la la la la la la la
Light a match and watch it gleam, fa la la la la la la la la
Watch the schoolhouse burn to ashes, fa la la la la la la la la
Aren't you glad you played with matches? Fa la la la la la la la la!

------------------
"That's entertainment!" —Vlad the Impaler

[Wicked Blue]

Jingle Bells, Batman smells,
Robin laid an egg,
The Batmobile lost a wheel,
and The Joker got away,
Hey!

Did anyone every wonder who made that up? I always assumed that it was a local thing (Brooklyn), but my husband grew up outside of Boston and knew the words too. I guess what I want to know is who else knows this song, and where you're from. Also any information on where it came from would be greatly appreciated :)
Thanks,
Blue


------------------


"I wore an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time..."

[UncleBeer]

I can remember singing that sucker back here in Toodleedoo, O-hi-ya.

------------------
"Some people are worried about the difference between right and wrong. I'm worried about the difference between wrong and fun."
~P.J. O'Rourke~

[PunditLisa]

My daughters have been singing that for a couple weeks and were shocked to find out that mommy and daddy sang it when they were kids. Their version, however, has a slight variation.

"And Joker took ballet."

[HeyHomie]

I grew up in a no-hope, industrial, God-forsaken town in the Midwest (Springfield, IL) in the 70's, and I sang it all the time; irritated my 'rents to no end.

As to where it originated - just a WAG, but this sounds like the handiwork of either a MAD magazine writer, or perhaps Walt Kelly ("Pogo").

[The_Peyote_Coyote]

I submit is was written by the same genius who penned:
"Great green gobs of ooey, gooey gopher guts,
marmaladed monkey nuts
and me without my spoon."
I remember a group of us boys pissed off a scoutmaster back in the early '70s by singing the Jingle Bell parody. He thought it was disrepectful of Christmas and Christ.
This good Christian had five children -- one is a former dope fiend who was convicted of child molesting, one is a punk, one is one of the snottiest bitches I have ever met, one is a lazy slut on welfare and the fifth I can't comment about -- haven't seen or heard of her in a couple of decades.
It just goes to show.

------------------
The Coyote gnaws ....
but he does not swallow.

[Arnold Winkelried]

Here's the version I used to sing:

Jingle Bells, Batman smells,
Robin laid an egg,
The Batmobile lost a wheel,
and The Commissioner had to pay.

I've always wondered why the police chief would be financially liable for damage to the batmobile.

------------------
Quand les talons claquent, l'esprit se vide.
Maréchal Lyautey

[PunditLisa]

Neurro, that sounds awfully close to a Shawn Colvin song...

(Winking at Tom) And per Tom's request, here is MY rendition of a family favorite, "On Top of Spaghetti".

(Clearing throat)

On top of Spaaaa-ghetti,
All covered with cheese,
I lost my poor meatball,
When somebody sneezed.

It rolled off of the taaa-ble,
And onto the floor.
And then my poor meatball,
Rolled out of the door.

It rolled into the garrrr-den,
And under a bush.
And now my poor meatball,
Is nothing but mush!


Thank you!! thankyouverymuch!

[Sealemon88]

Gee, what's on today's menu?

Gobs and gobs of greasy, grimy, gopher guts,
marinated monkey feet,
NTG's little dirty feet! ;)
French fried eyeballs dipped in a bowl of glue
I forgot my spoon...
Have a straw!

Blood sandwiches-Spuds on top.
monkey vomit, camel snot.
Rabbits eyeballs dipped in glue
Yummy, yummy good for you.

.
.
.
.
.

Don't even get me started on the "Deck The Halls With Gasoline" parody.

------------------
You say "cheesy" like that's a BAD thing.

[Mr Thin Skin]

Back in the late 60s I remember _Greasy Grimy Gopher Guts_, _On Top of Spaghetti_, and _Jiggle Bells, Batman Smells_ being on a red 45 we used to play all the time.

[Mr Thin Skin]

One more from that red 45:

Oh Dunderbeck, Oh Dunderbeck
How could you be so mean
To ever have invented
The sausage meat machine
And now all the neigbors cats and dogs
Will never more be seen
Since you invented
The sausage meat machine.

[Enright3]

On top of a beeeeer can,
all covered with foam,
I had one to maaaaany,
and couldn't get home.

They called for a taaaaaxi,
the one with the stars,
It took me to the hoteeeeel,
the one with the bars.

Sorry... it's all I can remember for now.

I'm trying to remember a Jingle Bells type song that ends with ...oh what fun it is to ride in a crashed up Chevrolet!

Enright3

[The_Peyote_Coyote]

Do any of you remember a long song about a strange junior high and a skinny girl named Alice.
We sang the damn thing in Boy Scouts and two lines still haunt my brain:
"Oh my goodness, oh my soul!
There goes Alice down the hole
To the sewer, to the sewer, to the sewer."
The second line said the school's colors were purple and white. "White is for purity and purple is for fight, fight, fight!"
I would appreciate it if someone with a better memory would post the song's title and any other lines they remember.

------------------
The Coyote gnaws ....
but he does not swallow.

[OpalCat]

Isn't "On top of spaghetti" a Shel S. poem?

Anyone remember the words to the one... goes something like
Magdelina Hagdelina (something something something something)
she had two hairs on her head
one was alive and the other was dead
(blah blah)
she had to teeth in her mouth
one pointed north and the other one south
(blah blah)
and ended with something about having two feet like bathroom mats?

------------------
--
Teeming Millions: http://fathom.org/teemingmillions
"Meat flaps, yellow!" - DrainBead, naked co-ed Twister chat
O p a l C a t
www.opalcat.com (http://www.opalcat.com)

[Stevie Rave On]

I never heard that "Great big globs...." thing except the first line is spoken in one of the funniest movies ever, Caddyshack, by Bill Murray as he's trying to kill the gopher.

Anyone remember the words to the one... goes something like Magdelina Hagdelina (something something something something)--Opal

Hi Opal! Yup, I remember it (partially).

Goes something like this:

Hagnalina Magnalina Hoopensteiner Wallendiner
Hogan Logan Bogan was her name.

She had to hairs growin' out her head
One was alive, and the other was dead.

Hagnalina Magnalina Hoopensteiner Wallendiner
Hogan Logan Bogan was her name.

She had to eyes buggin' out her head
One was green and the other was red.

Hagnalina Magnalina Hoopensteiner Wallendiner
Hogan Logan Bogan was her name.

She had to teeth pokin' out her mouth,
One pointed east and the other pointed south.

Hagnalina Magnalina Hoopensteiner Wallendiner
Hogan Logan Bogan was her name.

(don't remember the rest....)

Has anyone ever heard this one?:

Eenie beanie popsideanie
All ball boomsalini
Georgie Porgie
Liberace, and his brother John.
Have a peach, have a plum,
Have a stick of chewing gum.
If you want it, Aleman
Aleman, hocus pocus
Donnalocus San Diego
Dandiego equals GRAVY!



------------------
StoryTyler
I am *too* in shape! :::muttering::: Round is a shape.
C'mon up and see me sometime. (http://sites.netscape.net/storytyler/homepage)

[Little Nemo]

Growing up in Northern NY we learned a slight different variant:

Three quart jars of greasy grimy gopher guts
Marmaladed monkey's feet
Chopped up baby parakeet
Three quart jars of greasy grimy gopher guts
And I forgot my spoon

In the 60's & 70's-- we had the Batman xmas song, Chicago/Milwalkee area versions were mutually identical. BUT...


it was "batmobile, lost a wheel,
Comissioner broke his leg!"

------------------
Save The Endangered Jackalope! Send Cash Now! If You Do This, I Will Use The Cash To Save Any Jackalope That I Happen To Find! Send Cash Now! Before It's Too Late! My Bills, I Mean The Jackalope's Bills Are Due The 15th Of The Month!
This has been a message from the Illuminated Committee To Save The Jackalope. Fnord.

[Gaudere]

I learned a different version of the sausage machine song.

Oh Mr. Johnny Quebec,
How could you be so mean?
We told you you'd be sorry
For inventing that machine
Now all the neighbor's cats and dogs
Will nevermore be seen
They've all been ground to sausages
In Johnny Quebec's machine

One day the machine broke
The darn thing wouldn't run
So Johnny Quebec, he crawled inside
He thought it would be fun
Along came his wi-ife
She though she'd play a prank
She gave the crank
A heck of a yank
And Johnny Quebec was meat!

Oh Mr. Johnny Quebec,
How could you be so mean?
We told you you'd be sorry
For inventing that machine
Now even Mr. Johnny Quebec
Will nevermore be seen
'Cause he's been ground to sausages
In his very own machine!

[Brightmoon]

the gopher guts song as i remember it goes:
Great big globs of gresy grimy gopher guts
Marinated monkey meat
french fried birdy feet
Lizards eyeballs dipped in kerosien
and i forgot my spoon
but i still have my straw.
SLURPPPPPPP!!!
thats how this kid learned it.

------------------
Whatever!!! Just don't screw up my life with your wicked stupid ideas!

[Jois]

Mr. Coyote, We learned this as kids:

Alice, where are you going?
Upstairs to take a bath.
Alice has legs like tooth picks
and a neck like a giraff.
Oh my goodness, oh my soul,
there goes Alice down the hole.
Alice, where are you going?
Glug, glug, glug.

Not quite the boy scout song, is it?

[muffinman]

Here's a couple I learned from my dad (don't laugh at my weird family)

Old McDonald sittin on a bench,
floggin his dick with a monkey wrench.
Missed his dick and hit his balls.
Shit 'em out on his overalls!

Old Mr. Prick had a 6 foot dick,
and he showed it to the woman next door.
She thought it was a snake,
and chopped it with a rake,
and now it's only 3 foot 4.

If you don't work with total vigor,
they'll replace youw with a n-----.

There's a skeeter on my peter, SLAP IT OFF!!!
THere's another on my brother, SLAP IT OFF!!!
There's a dozen on my cousin,
can't you hear them fuckers buzzin,
There's a skeeter on my peter, SLAP IT OFF!!!

and the granddaddy of all "On top of spagetti..."

On top of old smokey,
all covered with sand.
I killed poor old (enter name),
with a red rubber band.

I shot him with pleasure,
I shot him with pride.
I couldn't have missed him,
he's 40 feet wide.

I went to his funeral
I went to his grave
Some people threw flowers,
but I threw grenades.

And then 10 years later,
he came back once more.
And so I kicked (enter name)'s
butt right out the door!!!

------------------
I heard a knock at the door of my heart, but it was a vacuum cleaner salesman!

[Ursa Major]

I can confirm the OP's version was popular in California in the mid-'60s.

How about this rendition of the Woody Guthrie classic:

This land is my land
and only my land
If you don't get off
I'll blow your head off
I've got a shotgun
and you ain't got one
This land was made for only me.

There was also a burn-down-the-school-kill-all-the-teachers song set to "Battle Hymn of the Republic" but I don't remember all the words.

[Seraphim]

I'm surprised no one mentioned this song, popular in the schoolyard I grew up in:

Do your balls hang low?
Do they wobble to-and-fro?
Can you tie them in a knot?
Can you tie them in a bow?
Can you throw'em over your shoulder
Like a continental soldier?
Do you balls...hang...low?

[timmar68]

Here's what we sang on Guam instead of "Jingle bells"-

Here we are on Guam
Without a hope of snow
Under spreading palms
Typhoons sure to blow (whoosh!).
Santa Claus will know
What the traffic will allow...
Instead of riding 8 reindeer he'll ride 8 caribou!

Jungle bells, coconut shells, stickleburrs all the way
Oh, what fun it is to ride in a caribou cart today, hey!
Jungle bells, coconut shells, stickleburrs all the way
Oh, what fun it is to ride in a caribou cart today!


They pronounced caribou like cari-bow ("bow" rhymes with "cow").

------------------
MaryAnn
No, stupid, it's a boat!

[RoboDude]

Does anyone remember the rest of the words to this song?

When you're ridin' in a Chevy and you feel something heavy,
Diarrhea, diarrhea

Whwn you're climbin' up a ladder and you feel something splatter
Diarrhea, diarrhea

etc...

[voguevixen]

My Eyes have seen the glory of the burning of the school
we have tortured every teacher, we have broken every rule

That's all I remember!

Also:
Ta ra ra boom de ay!
We have no school today
the teacher passed away
ta ra ra boom de ay

Ta ra ra boom de ay
we threw her in the bay
they sharks had lunch today
ta ra ra boom de ay.

Anyone?

------------------
"There's a snake in my boot!

[Wicked Blue]

Oooh....the diarrhea song! My friends and I could keep this song going forever!

When you're looking at the moon,
and you hear a ka-boom,
diarrhea (fart-fart) diarrhea

When you're sitting on a rock,
and it's running down your sock,
diarrhea (fart-fart) diarrhea

Some people think it's gross,
but it's really good on toast,
diarrhea (fart-fart) diarrhea

I'll post more if I think of it :)
Blue

------------------


"I wore an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time..."

[voguevixen]

I remembered the chorus:

Glory, glory, Hallelujah
teacher hit me with a ruler
so I blew her out the door
with a loaded 44
now teacher ain't teacher no more!

(alternate: "so I hit her in the bean with a rotten tangerine" don't know what the last line was to that variation)

------------------
"There's a snake in my boot!

[Ophanim]

Jingle Bells go to hell
You can kiss my butt
You're such a rotten loser
And your mother is a slut
Ho!

Your mother's in the kitchen
Giving Santa head
Your sister's in the bathroom
Screwing Mr. Ed


Whee! I just made that one up! What a sophomoric prick I am.



------------------
This is HDTV, it has better resolution than the real world - Fry

[Kat]

I remember the Battle Hymn as:

Mine eyes have seen the glory of the burning of the school
We have tortured every teacher, we have broken every rule
And tomorrow after school we're gonna hang the principal
(His truth is marching on??)

Glory, glory, Hallelujah
Teacher hit me with a ruler
So I met her after school with my loaded .44
And she ain't my teacher any more.

[Enright3]

Yay [insert name] He's our leader,
He's the one who sucks our peter,
For a nickle or a dime,
He will do it any time,
If no money, that's the key!
[insert name] does it free!

[Pixoid]

Speaking of teacher jingles:

Row, row, row your boat,
Gently down the stream,
Throw your teacher overboard
And listen to her scream.

Five days later,
Floatin' down the Delaware,
Chewin' on her underwear,
Wish she had another pair.
Eight days later,
Eaten by a polar bear,
And that's how the polar bear died.

------------------
Question authority--just not mine.

[neuro-trash grrrl]

I learned:

...I met her in the attic with a semi-automatic
And she ain't my teacher no moooooooore...

Also, a couple more verses to the diarrhea song:

When you're sliding into first
And your pants are gonna burst
Diarrhea, diarrhea

When you're sliding into second
And can't hold it another second
Diarrhea, diarrhea

When you're sliding into third
And you feel a great big turd
Diarrhea, diarrhea

------------------
"That's entertainment!" —Vlad the Impaler

[MrsBWayne]

Mine eyes have seen the glory of the burning of the school
we have tortured every teacher we have broken every rule
we are going to hang the principle tomorrow after school
our troops are marching on!

glory glory hallelujah
teacher hit me with a ruler
met her at the door with a loaded .44
now she don't teach no more.

...is how I remember it.

it used to be a funny song, now it's a headline! eek!

[voguevixen]

Did anyone else ever sing:

I'm Popeye the sailor man
I live in a frying pan
they turned on the gas
and burned off my ass
I'm Popeye the sailor man! (TOOT TOOT!)

there are other verses where he lives in a garbage can and a Ford sedan, but danged if I can remember them.

------------------
"There's a snake in my boot!

[timmar68]

We used to sing-

I'm Popeye the sailor man
I live in a garbage can.
I only go swimming
With bow legged wimmin
I'm Popeye the sailor man! Toot toot!

------------------
MaryAnn
No, stupid, it's a boat!

[melanietarrant]

sung to "we wish you a merry christmas"

we wish you weren't living with us
we wish you weren't living with us
we wish you weren't living with us
so get out of here

excuse me if i'm mistaken
those are long distance call you're makin'
how long do you plan on takin'
advantage of us

you're hopelessly fat and lazy
you're constantly in the way see
you're driving us crazy
please get out of here

[Jake]

Not exactly a kid's song but I thought I'd pass this along:
(Sung to the tune of 'My Bonnie...')

My father sells snow to the junkies,
my mother makes synthetic gin,
my sister makes love for a living,
my God how the money rolls in!

Say goodnight, Gracy....

[G.B.H. Hornswoggler]

I always heard the refrain of the "Battle Hymn of the Republic Kill-Your-Teacher" version as:
Glory, Glory Hallelujah
Teacher hit me with a ruler
Met her at the door with a loaded .44
And she don't teach no more

(I tried to sing some of the other versions posted here, and there seemed to be too many words in the last line for the meter.)

And I've always sang "My Bonnie" as:
My father lies over the ocean
My mother lies over the sea
My father lies over my mother
And that's how they got little me!

------------------
...but when you get blue, and you've lost all your dreams, there's nothing like a campfire and a can of beans!

[Wicked Blue]

This one is sung to the tune of 'The Addams Family'

The (insert name here) family started
When Mrs_____ farted
They all became retarded
The ______ family

Blue
(responding to her OP for the 4th time)

------------------


"I wore an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time..."

[Kat]

I'm Popeye the sailor man
I live in a garbage can
I eat all the worms
And spit out the germs
I'm Popeye the sailor man

------------------
Your Official Cat Goddess since 10/20/99.

"I get along well with everybody." --I.M.F.

[Jois]

I dug this up to add:

Don't ever laugh when the hearse goes by
For you might be the next to die.

They wrap you in a big white sheet
And bury you under 6 feet deep.

It all goes well for a week or two
And then the casket begins to leak.

The worms crawl in
The worms crawl out
They all play pinochle on your snout.

The pus pours in
The pus pours out

...and here I am without a spoon!

Another good Boy Scout song. Seemed to be from the same time as Batman Smells and the variations on Jingle Bells and A Christmas Carol.

[Sylence]

That's not quite how I remember that one. . .

Warning: this is extremely gross.

Don't you ever laugh as the hearse goes by,
For you may be the next to die.
They wrap you up in a big white sheet
From your head down to your feet.
They put you in a big black box
And cover you up with dirt and rocks.
All goes well for about a week,
Then your coffin begins to leak.
The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out,
The worms play pinochle on your snout.
They eat your eyes, they eat your nose,
They eat the jelly between your toes.
A big green worm with rolling eyes
Crawls in your stomach and out your eyes.
Your stomach turns a slimy green,
And pus pours out like whipping cream.
You spread it on a slice of bread,
And that's what you eat when you are dead.


-- Sylence

p.s. I did warn you.

------------------
I don't have an evil side. Just a really, really apathetic one.

[Persephone]

I remember the OP's version of Jingle Bells, and I'm from Michigan. I also remember the other on eBlue mentioned, with the Cheerios, but I heard "blows his nose in Cheerios," not "picks his nose with Cheerios."

Apparently I'm the only person on the planet who never, ever heard "Greasy Grimy Gopher Guts, until I started hanging around this board. I'm no saint, and I enjoy a good gross-out every now and again, but that one is beyond gross. Bleah. But hey, I learned something new today. :)

[Konrad]

I remember one that has the line:

"The school burned down and all the teachers died,

the principal is gone, we stuffed him down the john"

something something

"the janitor is dead, we shot him in the head"

PunditLisa, you forgot a couple verses:

On top of Spaghetti,
All covered with cheese,
I lost my poor meatball,
When somebody sneezed.

It rolled off the table
And onto the floor,
And then my poor meatball
Rolled out of the door.

It rolled in the garden
And under a bush,
And then my poor meatball
Was nothing but mush.

The mush was as tasty
As tasty could be,
And early next summer,
It grew into a tree.

The tree was all covered
With lovely green moss
and plenty of meatballs
And tomato sauce.

So if you love spaghetti
All covered with cheese,
Hold on to your meatballs,
And don't ever sneeze!!

I actually learned this one in college, at
the height of Barney popularity:

I love you, you love me,
That spells be-sti-a-li-ty,
With a hand grenade and a loaded .44,
No more purple dinosaur!



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Settle for what you can get, but first ask for the world.
--Ka'a Orto'o, Gnomic Utterances C iv

[Shayna]

I remember the Jingle Bells song with several of the variations here. I grew up in St. Louis in the 60's/70's. I also remember Kara's version of "On Top of Spaghetti". We sang the greasy grimy gopher guts song too, but I would never have remembered all the words, and I couldn't begin to tell you which version we sang.

Did anyone sing the Comet song?

Comet; it makes your mouth turn green
Comet; it's made of kerosene (or gasoline - I remember it both ways)
Comet; it makes you vomit
So get some Comet and vomit today!

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"How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to
improve the world." - Anne Frank

[Ursa Major]

Was the Comet song sung to the theme from "Bridge over the River Kwai"?