Unorthodox ways out of jury duty.

[Inky]

Recently I got myself out of jury duty. On the little form they send under "Physical or mental disabilities that might prevent you from serving" I wrote that I was paranoid schizophrenic an that my medication--lithium and paxil--made me too drowsy to serve and that I had outbursts and nervous ticks (I was also toying with voices in my head, but decided it would be overkill).

Anyway, it worked. Not only haven't I heard back from them I suspect I might not even get a census taker at my door.

So, whats your story?

(And no, I'm not REALLY schizophrenic. Dammit, quit sniggering Orangecakes, I'm am NOT!).

[Boris B]

This method only works if you don't mind showing up the first day:
When the second counsel comes into the room, stand up, smile and wave. "Good luck on this one, old chum!"
You'll probably get kicked off the jury.

Another way to do it, would be to write that you were perfectly fit to serve on a jury, and were in fact eager to do so, since you are certain that the accused is always guilty, and want to hang as many of them as possible in as short a time as possible.

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I don't want to make people think like me, I want them to think like me of their own free will.

[Jodi]

I am not listening to this -- lalalalalalalala.

But ya'll know you're breaking the law, right? 'Kay; just checking.


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Jodi

Fiat Justitia

[manhattan]

Not for nothin’, Inkster, but lying on a jury duty questionnaire can sometimes get you out of the jury box and into the defendant’s chair. Bad trade.

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Livin' on Tums, Vitamin E and Rogaine

[Arnold Winkelried]

Well, I've always wanted to be on a jury and see the legal system at first hand.

The last time I received a jury summons, I already had plane tickets for my summer vacation. I was bummed to the max too, because my previous company paid for jury duty, your full salary, with no time limit, and I had the chance to be on a three-week trial, so it must have been something important. The judge took my word for it (the fact that I already had plane tickets). I said "I'll be willing to come back next month" and he said OK. Haven't heard anything since.

Previous experience: One month I received a jury summons, threw it on the old pile of unpaid bills, and forgot about it. A couple of months later, I remembered "s***! tomorrow is the first day of my jury duty month!" So I called in to the clerk's office to find out when I was supposed to show up. She said "I don't see you listed as having to report for jury duty."

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Quand les talons claquent, l'esprit se vide.
Maréchal Lyautey

[techchick68]

Luckily, the only time I have ever been asked to serve on a jury I had moved out of town.

I hadn't changed my drivers license to reflect the new address after about 30 days. I called the city I was 'sposed to serve in and the lady gave me a tongue lashing over not changing my address.....well sheesh, if I am correct, you have 30 days from the date you move to update your address (I could be wrong, but they do that with out of towners and car license plates.)

Well, that's one way, simply move or tell them you are moving.

hehe

[techchick68]

Clarification.....I was still within the 30 day after moving....based on the date they sent out the notice and it was forwarded to my then current address.

< think think think before you post techchick >

[Sylence]

You really shouldn't do this sort of thing guys. . .

That said, I've never served on a jury because they've always cancelled the trial. Well, okay, one time it was scheduled during finals week at college and I got out of it that way, but. . .


-- Sylence

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I don't have an evil side. Just a really, really apathetic one.

[Arnold Winkelried]

Previous experience: One month I received a jury summons, threw it on the old pile of unpaid bills, and forgot about it. A couple of months later, I remembered "s***! tomorrow is the first day of my jury duty month!" So I called in to the clerk's office to find out when I was supposed to show up. She said "I don't see you listed as having to report for jury duty."

BTW, I should add to this story, in case it isn't clear, that there is a form you need to send back to the county clerk. I never sent it back because I forgot to. I suspect that's the reason why I wasn't listed for jury duty when I called.

if I am correct, you have 30 days from the date you move to update your address

In California, they only give you ten days. Yes, that's it, ladies and gentlemen, TEN days. As if, when you're in the midst of packing, moving, cleaning the old place, cleaning the new place, arranging to move your phone number to the new location (or get a new one altogether), new TV cable account, new PG&E billing, switching your newspaper subscription, unpacking, trying to learn the streets in your new 'hood, etc., you've got the time to deal with this minor (ticketable) "offense."



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StoryTyler
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
C'mon up and see me sometime. (http://sites.netscape.net/storytyler/homepage)

[dougie_monty]

I don't really do this sort of thing; as a paralegal I jump at any chance to get experience dealing with lawyers and court procedure. :) One time, though, I got a call from the courthouse in Long Beach, CA (I live in Gardena); I answered the wrong question about which group I was in and wound up getting on ONE jury pool. By the end of the 2 weeks I apologized to the jury office for the misunderstanding. (I WAS on a jury in Los Angeles 2 years ago; a criminal trial; we rendered a guilty verdict against a man caught in a drug sting.)
My former stepfather apparently lied on his jury form; apparently he preferred to spend his days off drinking--but then, who would want someone like THAT on a jury?

[Harmonious Discord]

The form I recieved said it was illegal not to return the form. At the time I was on some medicine that was really screwing me up.

I crumpled the form until half the copy toner was flaking off. Filled in the information with a crayon real big. It asked for the distance to the court house from my house. I said I had no fucking idea where the court house was.

Comments area: I have to take my medication when it's due reguardless of whatever else is goin on.

I sealed the envelope with a very strong glue, and sent it in. I didn't falsify any information, and sent back the form that said I had to legally return it.

I haven't been asked to serve in the last three years.

I only took that drug for about two more weeks before I hated everyone I saw, just because they were there. I quit taken this by myself before I did something bad to someone. Told the doctor time for something different. It's on the list of drugs the doctors should never give me again.

I'm not psycotic, it was just the medicine. We were trying to control my Sydenhams Chorea, and basicaly all the drugs are psyco-reactive. Think of Torretes and you have my symptoms.

I didn't realise this thread was going to Baruit. Hijack.

[Konrad]

You could always say you're bigoted against every race.

[Markxxx]

Though I have never been called to duty it is often said lawyers and judges are suspicious of anyone eager to serve.

[The LION]

Show up for jury duty wearing a tee shirt that says "FRY THE BASTARD".
The defense will strike you off the list fast enough to make your head spin.

Peace
t lion

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_________________________
" I Wonder What Happens When I push THIS Button? "
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Today was my tenth day of jury service, and now I'm free for another year.

They always throw me off panels. I always get called, because my company pays unlimited days, and I always get kicked off. Sometimes it's because I know the lawyer, or the judge. This last time I was sent to criminal courtrooms, and thought I had a chance. Indeed, the prosecution was willing to accept me, but the defense dinged me (wonder what THAT says!). I'd love to serve on a jury and find out what goes on inside the jury room first hand.

That being said, most judges will excuse you if you have pre-paid, non-refundable travel plans. But they better have been in existence BEFORE you got that jury summons. And often all that will get you is re-scheduled.

Interestingly, this time -- and maybe because it was my first time in criminal courtrooms -- the judge advised us at the beginning that we were bound to follow the instructions given by her on the law, whether we agreed with the law or not, and asked if we had any problems with that. I wasn't on the panel that had to respond to that at the time, but clearly the question was addressed to jury nullification. That got me thinking. I have a basic philosophy about following rules and laws: You follow them until there is a reason not to follow them. When there comes a reason not to follow them, you must determine the reason for the rule, and then consider whether the reason for following the rule is stronger than the reason for not following the rule. Then you must make a mature decision of conscience as to whether or not to follow the rule. Thus, for example, I gotta believe that I would not convict someone of a crime for stealing to feed their child.

This type of explanation would likely get me kicked off of any other jury panel, this time by the prosecution.

::sigh:: I guess I'm doomed to always be arguing in front of a jury rather than as part of it.

-Melin

[Shadowfox]

I'm 29 years old, and have never been called for jury duty, ever. My license has my current address and my voter's registration has the correct address, and yet nothing. I don't have any kind of criminal or mental history either, so I'll be damned as to why I never get called.

Oh wait, why am I bitching. This is a good thing...right?


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Shadowfox
"We are what we pretend to be."
- Kurt Vonnegut

[voguevixen]

Shadowfox -- Yeah, I didn't get called until I was 27 and I was totally shocked by it, lol. Jury duty? That's a real thing? I thought it was just on TV! My story is sorta funny, I went in on the day I was assigned and a lady told the big group of us a little bit about the process and how names are chosen and how we'd be called when our cases came up, etc. Then she told us where the snacks were and said something like "Now you wait. Hope you brought a book!" (Ha, ha.) Well we wait and the first group is called out and they get directions where to go. About an hour later another group is called and they get sent somewhere. Another hour or so later she starts listing off more names and I hear my name called, so I get my stuff together and get a piece of paper to write down my room number and judge. The lady says: "You are free to go. You have no further obligations and you do not need to call in tomorrow." We all filed out somberly as she was giving the group that was left instructions to their courtroom. We silently piled into the elevator and the minute the doors shut we all started laughing and whooping like it was the last day of school! One guy said "I've never been so glad to NOT be picked for something!" A truly surreal experience!

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"There's a snake in my boot!"

[Kyla]

In California, they only give you ten days. Yes, that's it, ladies and gentlemen, TEN days. As if, when you're in the midst of packing, moving, cleaning the old place, cleaning the new place, arranging to move your phone number to the new location (or get a new one altogether), new TV cable account, new PG&E billing, switching your newspaper subscription, unpacking, trying to learn the streets in your new 'hood, etc., you've got the time to deal with this minor (ticketable) "offense."

This may technically be true, Tyler, but in my experience, they're pretty forgiving. I was called for jury duty in Santa Cruz (where I go to school and am a registered voter) during the summer, when I was living with my parents at home (about 100 miles away). By the time the notice was forwarded to me, I was already too late to "officially" bow out, but I called and explained my situation, and they were very nice and called me to jury duty about two weeks after I got back to school, which I ended up not serving because my number never came up.

My housemate told me that her father always got out of jury duty by telling them that he was against the death penalty and would never consider it under any circumstances.



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~Kyla

"You couldn't fool your mother on the foolingest day of your life if you had an electrified fooling machine."

[TVeblen]

I've been called and served both times for jury duty. Being a conscientious dweeb, I pled real problems (i.e. showing up to defend the upcoming FY budget while sequestered.)

It cut no ice, folks. Talk about double edged swords. In the challenges, both attorneys said (quote) that librarians are fair and careful people. (Did they call NO librarians at the OJ trial?!)

Gotta say it was a migraine inducing drag. The bailiff could have passed for Ilsa the Concentration Camp Guard and we were shoved around like cattle. We even got the verbal equivalent of the "dip tank" somewhere in the chutes.

But gritching aside, it's a civic duty. Court groupies that thrive on this shit have to be deeply, certifiably sick. But most of the my fellow jurors were honest, concerned folks and I guess it's better most other systems.

Anyway, (blush) yeah I tried/hoped to "get off" but all in all, I'm glad I served.

Veb

[Catrandom]

I was never called until I moved from a tiny company to a corporate job -- a job where more than two dozen out of a hundred people have served in the last year. Does make you wonder about the randomness of the process.

Anyway, my asthma is bad enough that my doctor wrote me an excuse without hesitation. When I called the court the clerk I talked to was a bit suspicious at first, but I gave (I guess) sensible answers and then he was very nice. No problem. I wouldn't lie to get out of it, but I hate the idea of being on a jury and was glad to have an excuse.

Catrandom

Little wonder we get the kind of verdicts that keep the pundits growling with outrage -- all the smart people know how to get out of serving as jurors.

Maybe we should reverse the pressure and try to find a way to keep the bleedin' idiots safe at home, watching our decisions on their little talking boxes.

That said, I must admit I've often been called to jury duty but have never served. As a sole proprietor of a small business in a volatile industry, entanglement in a protracted trial could easily put sixteen people (including myself) out into the street. It hasn't yet escaped a judge's notice that the possibility of inducing sixteen bankruptcies and foreclosures would do little to lighten the overall caseload.

Fer ye case-hardened perjurers in the audience, I suppose I should also mention that I've never yet been asked to produce evidence to support this argument. They simply take ya at yer word. (Though they do make you sign yer name to it.)


Dr. Watson.
"And so then, what happens to that theory if God actually does turn out to be a little green watering can in Geneva?"

[Jackamus]

I've been called for jury duty 3 times.

The first time, I was dismissed because I knew the defendant (not a criminal case).

The second time, I think I was dismissed because, in answer to the prosecutor's question, I said that he would really REALLY have to prove the person guilty before I could agree to convict.

The third time, another civil case, the plaintiff's attorney had just finished representing my cousin in a civil suit.

I really wasn't trying to get out of it. That's just the way it worked out.

[stolichnaya]

Of the crafty avoiders.. how many of you have served on a jury? I've had one experience. It will likely be my last. I was foreman of the jury selected for a highly publicized civil trial that went on for a month. I had to work at least two or three hours a day in addition to the eight of the trial to keep my job. It was a royal pain in the ass. But it was the most intriguing experience of my life to date. Relationships developed and alliances and rivalries formed and disintegrated at an astonishing pace in the cramped jury room. After the verdict, twelve people who annoyed each other for four weeks and fought bitterly for almost two days hugged each other like old friends.

Not the typical case, I'll grant you. But if you have a chance and you can afford to spare a few days, it can be an experience quite suited to the curious mind.

[stolichnaya]

I should clarify...

I've been told it would be "my last" because of a) the length of the trial and b) the public nature of the case... both mitigate towards my remaining out of the pool for a long time, unless I move.

[zuma]

Well, i've been called several times. Never once was i ever questioned or chosen for a jury. I just sat in a room for a while, then was dismissed. A couple years ago, i read an article in the paper about avoiding jury duty. apparently they never take any action if you never respond. something about "it would look bad prosecuting people for avoiding jury duty".

taking that into account, i threw away my next jury summons. a couple months later i got another, along the lines of "since you missed the last one..."

i threw that one away as well. I have yet to hear from them again.

Take that for what it is worth.

[Glitch]

I would love to be on a jury, although perhaps just once. Hopefully, it would be an interesting case.

I got summoned a couple of years ago but was ultimately not allowed because I am not a citizen of the US.

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"Glitch ... Window, large icons." - Bob the Guardian

[BoBettie]

FWIW, you CANNOT get off at least reporting for jury duty in NY. My mother in law had just had hip surgery and my husband and I were caring for her, so he thought when he went in they would excuse him.

First off, no one is exempted before reporting. No one. Not doctors, not lawyers, not GOD. You must report. You get ONE extension if you need it, but if you use it you'll be called again right away and you must report.

When my husbands group was being discussed, they interviewed so many jurors and eliminated them that they were left with only a small group. That group was not even talked to, not given an opportunity to speak to the judge or anything. They were just picked. Period. No arguments, no getting out, no nothing. He had to serve a 3 day jury while I ran back and forth taking care of Mom.

So don't try any tricks in NY. Must be they've seen it all.
Zette

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Not enough and you're gonna die...
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[the Scarlet Pimpernel]

Ive gotten notices in the mail a couple of times, but never actually had to go in. The first time I was relieved because I had to fly to Chicago to audition for grad school at that time. But otherwise Ive been kinda disappointed. It's more than just civic duty, we as citizens are (partially) responsible for keepng the court system running smoothly ("speedy trial" and all that...). Also, it must be a hell of a lot more interesting to see it in action than just read about it in Civics class.

Letterman had a top ten list of how to get out of jury duty...my three faves (okay, the only three I can remember):
Randomly point to people in the courtroom and shout, "He did it! She did it! He did it!"
Answer every question with, "Let me ask the little man who lives in my pants."
Loudly say, "Hey! Who's frying baloney?"



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the Artist Formerly Known as Kara

[handy]

This year I got called three times in two months. lol.

You can't use deafness as an excuse anymore because they provide interpreters. But being deafened, I simply say that I don't know enough sign language yet for something that fast. As you can see, they kept writing me two more times...lol

[dlv]

I was on jury duty earlier this year (this is NY) and heard two funny excuses during the voir dire (sp?).

1. (I should note that this was an attempted murder trial. Both the defendant and the complaining witness were (East)Indian immigrants.) One prospective juror stated that he's very prejudiced against Indians and won't believe anything either one of them says. He got off.

2. One woman said she couldn't be sequested because she had incontinent cats at home. She got picked.

[Shirley Ujest]

First off, shame on all of you for ditching your duty to serve. Yes, it might be a pain in the ass to your job and your lifestyle, but so the hell is communism and facism.

I've been called four times: Once to US District (or was it Federal?I forget) court ( had to go downtown Detroit every day for two weeks and sit for 8 hours wondering if we would get picked. I live an hour and a half away. Detroit is a scary place in the daylight and I had to arrive there in the winter before the sun was up and left after it set. I met alot of interesting and intelligent people. Never got picked. My boss paid me for the entire time and let me keep the jury duty money and mileage.)

All the other times it's been local and I was picked to serve on jury duty for a murder trial. It was absolutely one of the most fascinating experiences of my life.Nothing like you see on TV. One guy on our duty was a high school principal and he thought it sucked at first and after the whole thing was done. One entire week invested ( we had Wednesday off, he said he would do it again in a heart beat. Me too.

It is a small price to pay for liberty and the freedoms we are use too.

[ruadh]

I got summoned once. They let me out of one case because I didn't have a job that would pay me to serve for 3+ months, and in the next case they found all their jurors and alternates before my name came out of the hat. But for the next two weeks I had to call in every morning to find out if I was needed. What SUCKED is that I was temping at the time, so I had to just take the two weeks off work - who's going to hire a temp who might have to leave after a few hours? - and I never got even the measly $5 per day that California jurors get. It is a damn good thing my bills weren't too high that month. The whole thing still pisses me off.

[Kat]

I've been called twice.

First time out I was sent down with several groups for the questioning process and eventually ended up being picked for a drug trial. Lasted several weeks and then I ended up getting drawn as an alternate so I didn't stay for the deliberations (although the alternates were told that they could be called back if one of the other jurors needed to be replaced). All the defendents (there were about a half dozen of them) were found guilty--the court clerk called with the verdict.

Second time, only a couple of groups were sent to the courtrooms for questioning (I wasn't in either of them) and then all the rest of the potential jurors were dismissed because the remaining cases of the day were settled or postponed.

There was a cop who ate lunch with a group of us in the cafeteria on my second time out, who told us how he dealt with jury summons. He threw them out--said that since the summons are just sent regular US mail, there's no way anyone could prove he got his.

As the jury system becomes more computerized, don't count on just being able to throw away the summons and not worry about it.

In Los Angeles County they WILL now follow up, and are imposing fines on up to $1500 for wilful failure to respond.

-Melin