Porn remakes of films

[BurnMeUp]

A lot of porn films remake existing films and change the title. Things like:

Edward Penishands
Jugsy
The Maddame's Family

So how about we see what porn remakes we can come up with:

Splatman and Throbbin'- The Dynamic Duo, battling the evils that threaten Gotham like The Diddler.

Another one I didn't come up with (but wish I did) I swear to god there is a porn filmed named "Yank My Doodle It's a Dandy"


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Don't let the loveless ones sell you a world wrapped in grey.

[Ringo]

Body of the Snatch Invaders

[Imthecowgodmoo]

I used to work at a video store so I got to see plenty of laughable titles... such as...

Foreskin Gump
Honey... I blew everyone!
Geriatric Park
Men in the Back

my favorite title of any porn flic would have to be "Slammin Granny in the Fanny!"


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"I'm not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information."-- Calvin and Hobbes
(__)
`\/-------\
`| |-----| |\
..c.c......c.c....

[Mr. Blue Sky]

I saw Edward Penishands. Absolutely hilarious!! Another "remake" was "Drivin' Miss Daisy Crazy"

All Genuine Titles

An American Nympho in London
Back Door to the Future
Ball Street
Ball in the Family
The Big Thrill
Bright Lights...Big Titties
Caddy Shack-Up
Cat on a Hot Sin Roof
The Days of Our Wives
Dracula Sucks
Earth Girls Are Sleazy
Fistful of Bimbos
For Your Thighs Only
Forrest Humps
Funky Brewster
The Godmother
The Good, the Bad, and the Horny
Hill Street Blacks
The Horney Mooners
In and Out of Beverly Hills
L.A. Raw
The Load Warrior
The Long Ranger
Mad Jack, Beyond Thunderbone
Max Bedroom
My Bare Lady
Nudes at Eleven
The Oddest Couple
One Wive to Give
The Pink Lagoon
Pornocchio
The Postman Always Comes Twice
The Rocky Porno Video Show
Splendor in the Ass
A Star is Porn
Strangers When We Mate
Terms of Endowment
Throbbin' Hood
Vaseline Alley
Where the Boys Aren't
Who Reamed Rosie Rabbit?
The Whore of the Worlds

[handy]

What if they did a porno remake of the Straight Dope board?

[Torgo]

The Blair Witch Who Takes it Up the Ass

Mystery Men Who Take it Up the Ass

For Love of the Game, and Taking it Up the Ass

Saving Private Ryan, Then Taking it Up the Ass

Taking it Up the Ass on the Titanic

Shakespeare in Love, Then He Gives it to Her Up the Ass



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Tim
"My hovercraft is full of eels."

[Drain Bead]

I think these are real, but they're funny nonetheless.

Intercourse With the Vampire
Bitanic (I KNOW that's real--when I saw the box, I laughed for 15 minutes)
Biladdin (again, real)
and my personal favorite...

How Stella Got Her Tubes Packed

[AuraSeer]

Star Whores: The Phantom Penis

There was a film called"Flesh Gordon". There should have been a film called "Fuck Rodgers".

On a related topic , I once had adream in which I starred in a nude remake of "The Life Of Abraham Lincoln". The title was "The Naked Abe".

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We have met the enemy, and He is Us.--Walt Kelly

[Satan]

Shindler's Fist

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Yer pal,
Satan

[Revtim]

On Golden Blonde
Shaving Ryan's Privates

[Shirley Ujest]

"Two fists for Sister Sara."

Ok, I made that one up.

[Coldfire]

A real one I once saw: "Cape Rear".

Let's think of some more possible titles.....
* Star Fuck - Reg's Erection
* GBWF (Gang Banged White Female)
* The Naked Bum 2 1/2
* Casaboinka
* Cum with the wind
* Jerry, Portrait of a serial rapist
* Descent Off Your Woman

I'm sure some of those have already been done ;)

Coldfire

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"You know how complex women are"
- Neil Peart, Rush (1993)

[Valerieblaise]

Actually, I've seen one called, (I believe), "Blackman and Throbbin," and also one called "The Bare-Ass Naked Gun." When I lived in the dorms my first year of college, the guys on my floor would go out and try to rent the best porn titles they could find. Another one was "Married:With Hormones." That was actually the first porno I ever saw. It was really bad, and hysterically funny.

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"You're going to listen
to ME? To something I
said? Haven't I made it
abundantly clear over the
tenure of our friendship
that I don't know shit?"
- Brodie, "Mallrats"

[BoBettie]

"How Stella Got Her Tubes Packed"
I almost split my side over that one...My God, that is HILARIOUS!
I have in my video collection:
"Will and Eds Bogus Gangbang"






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I'm very lucky. The only time I was ever up shit creek, I just happened to have a paddle with me.
--George Carlin

[Doug Bowe]

Here are two more actual and for real titles I'm surprised haven't shown up yet:
"Indiana Joan and the Black Hole of Mambo."
and "To Live and Shave in L.A."

[# 00: The Fool]

Actually, there's a lot of movies that would need no title change if they were made into porno films. Such as. . .

The 400 Blows
Things to Come
The Third Man
The Firm

Can anyone suggest others?

[BurnMeUp]

You know, if Fist Full of Dollars were remaid in Veit Nam it would be called Fist Full of Dong. (YDKJ)

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Don't let the loveless ones sell you a world wrapped in grey.

[AuraSeer]

The Agony And The Ecstasy

[AuraSeer]

The Joy Luck Club

[Heath Doolin]

Working at the video store I remember

Regarding Hiney (regarding henry)
Hannah Does her Sisters (Hannah and her Sisters)
Bright Lights, Big Titties (Bright Lights, Big City))

[ThufferinThuccotash]

Stop it, I can hardly breathe, I'm laughing so hard!!

"Pornocchio"-- BAHAHAHAHA!!!

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TT

"Believe those who seek the truth.
Doubt those who find it." --Andre Gide

[Louie]

What if they did a porno remake of the Straight Dope board?

I thought MPSIMS was the porno remake of SDMB.

[AuraSeer]

How 'bout a porn version of that Keanu Reeves sci-fi movie, called "The Mattress"? (Yeah, it's lame. Sue me.)

[Boris B]

I heard there was one called "Jurassic Pork". Which might have to do a battle of the porns with "Geriatric Park", mentioned above.

[lvick]

Satan: shindlers fist is truly inspired.

How 'bout:
Thighs wide shut
American hair pie
Big daddy
Deep blue throat
Buttfinger
A dog of Moll Flanders

[Satan]

Indecent Proposal

Oh wait...

[lvick]

The Iron Giant

[kathmandu]

A Queer and Pleasant Stranger.

[BurnMeUp]

In the Line of Fire


And the new animated classics
The Penis of Egypt
The Lion's Thing
Beauty and the Beast
101 Dalmations (hey is anyone seeing a trend in disney titles?)
A Bung's Life
Sex Toy Story (stolen from Mad TV)

From the B&D department
Citizen Pain
School Ties


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Don't let the loveless ones sell you a world wrapped in grey.

[Rysdad]

Toys in Babeland?

[Rysdad]

Sinderella: Lie to me you bastard!

Pornocchio: I am NOT moving my head like a jackhammer! I HATE this!

...............

And I, um, heard it was "Shaving Dyan's Privates."

[Sealemon88]

Real titles...(just laughing over the titles in the store < cough, cough >)

Romancing the Bone

The Sperminator

RambOhhhhh

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You say "cheesy" like that's a BAD thing.

[Babar714]

Twin Peaks
A Beaver Runs Through It
Bitches of Madison County
Backdoor Banzai
My Gay Left Foot (old family joke)
Twelve Inch Monkeys
Get Off on the Bus
Swing Shaft
Harry Does the Hendersons

[lvick]

Shaft

[RoboDude]

Snatch Adams

[RoboDude]

Alien Erection

[RoboDude]

Shag the Dog
Ghostfuckers
Spank Girl
Lust in Space
the Empire Sucks Back

---------------------------------------------
Actually, there's a lot of movies that would need no title change if they were made into porno films. Such as. . .

The 400 Blows
Things to Come
The Third Man
The Firm

Can anyone suggest others?
---------------------------------------------
Very Bad Things
Dick
Body Parts
Big
Disturbing Behavior
Spaceballs

[RoboDude]

My Left Testicle

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Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.

[Mentor and Liar]

Feltch
American History XXX
Pump Friction
Shindler's Lust
Dr Strange Unrequited Love or: How I Yearned to Love the Bombshell
Swingin' in the Rain
The Pleasure of the Sierra Madre
Reservoir Doggie-style
The Gropes of Wrath
Arsenic and Black Lace
Fuck, Suck, and Two Smoking Barrels
Fanny on Alexander's
The Touchables
Crimes and Misty Moaners
Backside Story
King Dong
Mark Serlin and the Adventures of Winnie the Poof

I feel a little guilty--picking off the easy ones.

martin

[Koxinga]

I'm waiting for "The Boner Collector"

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Exits, pursued by a bear

[MadPoet]

The one I always wanted to make was "Lust Action Hero", and show what *I'd* do if I found that golden ticket.

Also, I'd like to do "Jizzmoppers", a take off on Clerks, only in a porno store.

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http://www.madpoet.com
Computers have let mankind make mistakes faster than any other invention, with the possible exception of tequila and handguns.

wait . . .

"Earth Girls Are Easy" was NOT a porn film,

although maybe it should have been since it starred Gena Davis

oh and P.S.

my college buddies and I used to play a game to see who could come up with the best porn title . . . I would inevitably win with my fave :

"The Crack of Dawn"

I think this may actually be a porn flic now.

Ass Pirates
Circle Jerk of Friends
Stealing Booty
Extra-ordinary Peephole
The Tight Muff
Grease (waitaminnit...)

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"Are you frightened of snakes?"
"Only if they dress up as werewolves."
-Preacher

[Ayesha]

Satan, the strap on and everything ( The girl, the gold watch and everything)

Screwing Private Ryan

Two males for Sister Sarah

I know what I want to do to you this summer

Willy's Wonka in the chocolate factory



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Ayesha

[Diane]

I have a porno remake of a porno. It is called "Debbie Does The Dishes".

I swear.

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&gt;^,,^&lt;
KITTEN
Fluff yer hair Beula, I’s feelin frisky - M.S.

[RoboDude]

Farenheit 69

Diddle All the Way

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Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.

[RoboDude]

Meet Wally's Parts
or: Park Wally's Meat

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Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.

[aha]

I saw a porn paperback one time entitled:
For whom the Belles Toil

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"I think it speaks to the duality of man sir."
(private Joker in Full Metal Jacket)

[ubermensch]

ok this is a real one. it's the clever title of the month, according to adult video news. don't ask me why i was at their site, and just so you know, i've never been there before today.
http://www.adultvideonews.com/editch/title0100.html

hopefully that link works. anyway, it has nudity, and it's pretty disturbing

so if yer under 18...don't go there

[Drain Bead]

This probably exists as well, although I've never seen it...

Good Will Humping.

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"Buffalo Bills? Oh, yeah. The guys that always snatch defeat from the jaws of victory." --WallyM7

Ok, here goes:
Free my willy
Poke my hontas
Scream
The Spunkwell
Jerks
Anna on the King
Moonfuck
Mall-bratts
The Postman Cums Twice
The Rear Bimbo
Alice in Underwear
Wild Wild Breasts
Desperate Pleasures
Butterworld
Any Given Suckday
101 Dominatrix's
End of Lays
Peeing on John Malkovich
Don't Watch Hentai Anime While Dinking Bruce in da Hood.
Ragnolia
Humplestiltskin

~~~More to come, gimme some time!!!

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"And on the eighth day, God Created beer
to prevent the Irish from taking over
the Earth."
~SNOOGANS~

[RoboDude]

It's A Wonderful Sex Life

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Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.

[robbaba]

I can't believe nobody has listed my two favorites:

"A River Runs Through Her"

and

"Indiana Bones and the Temple of Poon"

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"It's like banging your head against a wall because it feels so good when you stop."

[RoboDude]

The Muppets Do Manhattan

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Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.

[crackwise]

American Booty
10 Things I Suck Off You
Fist Club
High Heels Drifter - okay, so this one's just just a drag video.


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Never give a sword to a man who can't dance.
-- a Celtic motto

[psycat90]

Homo Alone II
Lost in New York
Somewhere near Christopher Street

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Then Holley held Miss Spider's hand...
I'll say no more, you understand.
For private moments between spiders
Should not be witnessed by outsiders.
-David Kirk- Miss Spider's Wedding

Actually, regarding "Humplestiltskin", I think there's an actual porno called "Rumpled Foreskin".

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(to borrow a sig)The Poster Formerly Unknown as Rodimus
-
"Are you frightened of snakes?"
"Only when they dress like werewolves."
-Preacher

[RoboDude]

Wonka's Willy in the Condom Factory

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Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.

[RoboDude]

Inspect Her Gadget

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Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.

[Rysdad]

I guess there's one called "The Sapornos."

[WIU Wozman]

Let's go with some classics, guys!!

Balls of St. Mary's
Bone with the Wind
McClint's Cock

And to go with the Disney thing....where is Poke A Hot Ass?


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View every exit as an entrance someplace else

[RoboDude]

In Your Pants Day

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Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.

[The Stranger]

Sex Toy Story (stolen from MAD TV)
Sex Toy Story 2 -- that one's mine

[spankboy]

What about my Ginger Lynn fave:

'The Poonies'?

And, there was a whole list of bad porn in 'Clerks', like 'Men Alone 3: The K-Y Connection'.

-sb

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They say the Lord loves drunks, fools and little children.
Two out of three ain't bad.

[RoboDude]

Felching Ms. Tingle

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Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.

[RoboDude]

Dudley Do Her

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Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.

[RoboDude]

Here's something else to think about: What if they made porn movies based on TV shows? We'd probably see things like:

Third Cock From the Sun
the Sex Files
Mad About Screwing


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Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.

[ENC Heel]

Don't know if it's real, but:

E.T.: The Extra Testicle



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"I never lie, but I don't always say what I'm thinking."

ENC Heel

[RoboDude]

Feeling Malcovitch's Johnson

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Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.

[RoboDude]

Galaxy Breast

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Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.

[Kvallulf]

Dee Blew Me.

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Find my shape by the moonlight, why my thoughts aren't so clear.

[jab1]

Star Whores.

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&gt;&lt; DARWIN &gt;
____L___L__

[Surgoshan]

Star Warts:
Join Luke Skywakker as he travels to the planet Clamydia for the massive Space orgy. On the way, he will meet Princess Gonnalaya...

"Hello, I'm Luke Skywakker, and these are my two droids, R2Dcup and C3POhmygod."
"Hello, I am C3POhmygod, designed to bring exquisite pleasure to humans."
click, hmm
"Oh my GOD!"

He will also have to deal with the gangster Grabba the Butt.

"Now, Han solo, you will eat Bantha poodoo!"

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I sold my soul to Satan for a dollar. I got it in the mail.

[salinqmind]

"Saving Ryan's Privates"?