The Great Sun Jester
07-02-2004, 10:09 PM
...that will abort before they develop into good threads:
1) Yes, Mrs. Montoya, I love you and support you in your decision to get schooled as a nurse. No, Mrs. Montoya, I do not wish to accompany you to 'cadaver lab.' I had a hard enough time chopping up kitty in college biology, and I passed out at your DNC. I have absoulutely no desire to gaze at dissected people nor their bits.
2) Saddam is BACK! That sumbitch lives in a jail, but I'll be damned if He wasn't in charge of the courtroom! Even mafia bosses can run their organizations (sometimes more safely) from behind bars, if ANY Baath Nazis are out there and can communicate with Saddam, I fear for the "infant government" of Iraq. I fear His henchmen will cow or kill them one by one until the judge gets the point & acquits Him, agrees that He is the rightfully elected leader of Iraq unjustly captured & held by an unlawful invasion, and sets him free. It's wrong, but He must be assassinated before his trial. Will nobody jump on this grenade?
3) Our President says Saddam is a monster because he ordered the killing of his own people. Our president has blood on his hands from his tenure as Texas Governor--how many deaths do you have to order before you become a monster? 10,000? 1,000? 100? 10? 1? How about if you only order 10, but at least 1 is mentally incompetent, and thus not legally capable of a crime?
4) Who the F*** ever heard of an Harmonic Balancer when they were growing up? How did my neighbor blow his one month before mine went? Why is there only ONE (which is less than 5 miles from my house) that fits my car in all the junkyards in Colorado . Why does it cost $45 from the junkyard (because you NEED it, THAT's why!) but it costs $225 from Toyta?
5) What if we set up an FBI satellite office in Iraq to track & arrest insurgents? How about the same in Sudan? Afghanistan? Any other little self-destructive country in the world that needs help?
6) My garden recovered from the stomp of the hail god--I will have onions, peas, beans, canteloupes and carrots by August. Hoo-Rah!
7) I like The Kinks. I've always wanted to start a Kinks appreciation thread because I know there's nobody out there who hates the Kinks. And I think that while their songs are dead on balls accurate 100% of the time, nobody really feels good about the reality they show us, so they never get appreciated in public. Yeah Kinks! You guys make me weep openly!
8) I read 3 books from Steven King's Gunslinger series. I wish I had time to catch up.
9) My cat's breath does not smell like catfood, it smells like ASS! I think he's not a cat. I think he's a hairy Komodo dragon.
10) I love my wife, and I love my kids. I refuse to dedicate a post to any of them. The Straight Dope is MY realm. My wife is a genius, and she thinks TSD is silly (and it IS, that's the appeal!). She also does not like The Princess Bride. : sigh: My life is solitude.
1) Yes, Mrs. Montoya, I love you and support you in your decision to get schooled as a nurse. No, Mrs. Montoya, I do not wish to accompany you to 'cadaver lab.' I had a hard enough time chopping up kitty in college biology, and I passed out at your DNC. I have absoulutely no desire to gaze at dissected people nor their bits.
2) Saddam is BACK! That sumbitch lives in a jail, but I'll be damned if He wasn't in charge of the courtroom! Even mafia bosses can run their organizations (sometimes more safely) from behind bars, if ANY Baath Nazis are out there and can communicate with Saddam, I fear for the "infant government" of Iraq. I fear His henchmen will cow or kill them one by one until the judge gets the point & acquits Him, agrees that He is the rightfully elected leader of Iraq unjustly captured & held by an unlawful invasion, and sets him free. It's wrong, but He must be assassinated before his trial. Will nobody jump on this grenade?
3) Our President says Saddam is a monster because he ordered the killing of his own people. Our president has blood on his hands from his tenure as Texas Governor--how many deaths do you have to order before you become a monster? 10,000? 1,000? 100? 10? 1? How about if you only order 10, but at least 1 is mentally incompetent, and thus not legally capable of a crime?
4) Who the F*** ever heard of an Harmonic Balancer when they were growing up? How did my neighbor blow his one month before mine went? Why is there only ONE (which is less than 5 miles from my house) that fits my car in all the junkyards in Colorado . Why does it cost $45 from the junkyard (because you NEED it, THAT's why!) but it costs $225 from Toyta?
5) What if we set up an FBI satellite office in Iraq to track & arrest insurgents? How about the same in Sudan? Afghanistan? Any other little self-destructive country in the world that needs help?
6) My garden recovered from the stomp of the hail god--I will have onions, peas, beans, canteloupes and carrots by August. Hoo-Rah!
7) I like The Kinks. I've always wanted to start a Kinks appreciation thread because I know there's nobody out there who hates the Kinks. And I think that while their songs are dead on balls accurate 100% of the time, nobody really feels good about the reality they show us, so they never get appreciated in public. Yeah Kinks! You guys make me weep openly!
8) I read 3 books from Steven King's Gunslinger series. I wish I had time to catch up.
9) My cat's breath does not smell like catfood, it smells like ASS! I think he's not a cat. I think he's a hairy Komodo dragon.
10) I love my wife, and I love my kids. I refuse to dedicate a post to any of them. The Straight Dope is MY realm. My wife is a genius, and she thinks TSD is silly (and it IS, that's the appeal!). She also does not like The Princess Bride. : sigh: My life is solitude.