Men - how do you feel about sexy lingerie?

[Nacho4Sara]

I am wondering because I mentioned to some guy friends that I just spent $100 at Victoria's Secret (semi-annual sale, ya know :)), and they basically said that they never care about that stuff. I always thought guys went for sexy lingerie (not teddies or anything, but cute bras with matching panties, embroidered, lacy, sheer, that sort of thing).

So do ya'll care? Or don't you notice at all?

[Eo Echo]

Absolutely. I personally try to be observant and notice and remark upon such things, as they are often a plesant surprise, and usually one which the woman in question has taken pains to do for my benefit. How can anyone not dig that (unless they're a total dog)?

[Saint Zero]

Of course lingere is a good idea on a woman! It's all about the thrill of the chase and pursuit; not how fast you can grind em into the ground. Yikes.

[Danielinthewolvesden]

Tell you what, Nacho, take some pictures and post them, and we'll be VERY sure to give them our unbiased opinion. ;)


Yes, us guys like lingerie, but we also like sexy outer clothes. Stockings are a particular fave of mine, as well as demi-bras, lacey bras, and, of course, thongs. The only thing that usually doesn't matter is the pattern, we don't really give a damn about how nice IT looks, it is how nice YOU look in them, see what I mean?

[Narile]

It really kind of depends on the type of lingerie and the person to be wearing it. What works on one body type will not nessisarily(sp) work on another. The proper lingerie will work to enhance the alure and mystery of the form. Some lingerie hides nothing (And thus I generally dislike it.) while others reveal just enough. The lingerie can show everything but still give the impression of hiding, this is often very....aluring. :)

[ricepad]

Well, Nacho4Sara, I'm thinkin' a LOT o' guys are clickin' on your profile to see if you have any pix there...

Personally, I like women in lingerie...just about any kind of lingerie. It could be that, if you were talking to frat boys (See? I checked out your profile!), well, they may just be young and stupid...or in too much of a hurry to unwrap the package, without appreciating the wrapping.

Don't let them dissuade you...keep on shopping at Victoria's Secret, and you'll make some guy VERY happy...

[SPOOFE]

Well... I'm kinda odd... ::sheepish look::...

In my mind, lingerie is nice and nifty (don't get me wrong), but it really doesn't have to be a $100 bra or anything. It's how it's worn, I guess. And the person that it's worn by.

See, if I saw you (no offense to you, I swear!) wearing what would be considered a "sexy" bra and panties, I'd look and I'd think "Ooh, nice"... btu I probably wouldn't be getting all hot and steamed.

However, if a different girl-whom-I-have-a-sick-crush-on (she ain't a member of the 'Dope... yet) were to wear... say... black socks, that'd drive me crazy. In fact, it DOES drive me crazy. I ask her to wear black socks all the time. She could be fully clothed... heck, she could be dressed like a nun... but as long as she's got those simple black socks on... OOOOOOHHHH... I get all giggly and silly...

So it's more of the person, for me at least. But lingerie would be nice on that person (oh, would it ever...::giggles like a schoolboy::...)

[Danielinthewolvesden]

Would somebody turn a hose on that lad? :D

[DRY]

I never wear it.

Seriously, it does depend on the person in question wearing it. But as has already been said, the fact that you went out of your way for someone gets you megapoints in my book.

As a semi-hijack, I once bought a Victoria's Secret gift certificate for a friend (not a girlfriend, but I'll admit I wanted her VERY, VERY badly). I can't tell you how embarrassed and self concious I was while I was in the store (since if I ran into anyone I knew, it's a good bet that that person would know that I DON'T have a girlfriend).

[Little Nemo]

My guess Nacho is that your guy friends were trying to impress you with how cool they are. To your face they said "No, I've never found lingerie all that interesting." But in their heads they were doing a Homer Simpson voice "Sara in a garter belt, uuuuuuuhhhhh."

[Una Persson]

Is this just for men? Or can a lesbian contribute as well?

[Nacho4Sara]

Sure, any opinions are welcome.

Well, I appreciate everyone contributing. I guess the opinion of college boys (the ones I meet, anyway) and of real MEN differ. :)

My problem arose when a friend asked why I had spent so much money on lingerie, since I don't have a boyfriend. I said I liked it for me, and when I have a boyfriend, he will like it too. Then he said, "It's true, ya know, guys don't care."

I figured he was a loser. I mean, if I have on a $30 sheer bra embroidered with flowers, and he just looks at it and moves on, he would never get to see the matching panties.

And by the way, I am not uploading soft-core porn of myself in aforementioned panties. I believe they have entire issues of PLayboy dedicated to college girls, so buy one of those. Keep dreaming, boys! :)

[handy]

Im a guy & I do NOT wear lingerie nor buy it for myself. So I don't like lingerie; but noticed some guys pointed out specifically that they were talking about lingerie on women. In that case, I prefer a woman naked, that way I know shes ready.

[Initial Entry]

I guess the opinion of college boys (the ones I meet, anyway) and of real MEN differ.

Are you implying that these are two mutually exclusive groupings?

[Silo]

Lingerie is nice when i'm in the romantic mood, otherwise the clothes come off so quick i'd never notice if you were wearing any. Sometimes i'm into lustin' it but more often i'm into bustin' it. :D

[matt_mcl]

I like lingerie.

Men's lingerie.

Ok, ok. Boxer-briefs.

[Johnny Angel]

I have a few of what might be called clothing fetishes, but most of them don't involve the sorts of things that cost $100 at Victoria's Secret. Recognizing that underwear has an erotic element, I think the makers of fancy lingere have gone on to miss the point. Fancier doesn't mean more erotic. The erotic arises from the tension between what is revealed and what is hidden, what is covered and what is accessible.

[Lamia]

Funny, I've never heard a man say he didn't like seeing a woman in sexy lingerie before.

What I do often hear is women complaining about the black lingerie their boyfriends buy for them. Men seem to think that black lingerie is the sexiest of all, but many women think it just looks trashy.

[elucidator]

Well, I'm positively nuts about sexy lingerie!!

Especially if there's an actual woman inside!

It should be lacy, flimsy, vaguely slutty and easily removed.

Cheerleader costumes, however.......

[DRY]

Well, I'm positively nuts about sexy lingerie!!

Especially if there's an actual woman inside!

It should be lacy, flimsy, vaguely slutty and easily removed.

Cheerleader costumes, however.......


What the hell are you talking about? I LOVE cheerleader costumes!

Except that the women in them are generally in their early 20s (at oldest) and I'm far too old for them... :(

[Mr. Cynical]

For me, it's not the lingerie is how you package the gift. It's wrapping paper, metaphorically. It's nice to look at, sure, but it ends up crumpled in the corner while you're playing with what came inside it.

[Spoke]

Yes, lingerie is a good investment!

Weird that we guys prefer to see women in bold colors (Red! Black! White!), yet women always seem to prefer to buy pastels or flesh tones. (Flesh tones are right out, by the way. No sex appeal whatsoever. Pastels can be OK, depending on the garment, but I rarely get worked up over them.)

[RTFirefly]

Count me amongst the lingerie fans, Sara! The same sort of 'sweet nothings' may not work on all women, but there's enough different kinds of lingerie to suit all types.

I didn't know there were (hetero) guys out there who didn't like to see women wearing lingerie. My guess is that few of them have ever been involved with the same woman for very long. After all, in a long-term relationship, one frequently sees one's SO unclothed in non-sexual situations. Lingerie makes the statement that the situation isn't non-sexual - at least, she sure doesn't want it to be non-sexual. After all, she's not going to be dressing up in something slinky just so she can wash the dishes.

[Sledman]

Nacho4Sara

Couple observations that are more or less reiterations from previous posters.

1.) Sometimes it doesn’t matter what you are wearing. Sometimes you have spent an evening of heightened anticipation that results in the parties involved basically tearing their partner’s clothes off.

2.) Younger men tend to be more interested in quickly removing the wrapping than appreciating your beauty and all of the subtleties of the female form. With age comes wisdom.

6.) Your “friends” are probably still talking about the fact that you have this lingerie. And it is driving them nuts. Every guy in here knows the conversation they had as soon as you left.

3.) The beauty of lingerie is how it highlights the female form and how it almost… but doesn’t show everything. That air of mystery is what drives men up a wall. It’s not what you see but what you almost see.

4.) As to color I think that is dependent on the female in question. Certain colors look better on certain women.

5.) It is similar to framing a great work of art. It enhances the overall beauty.


Yours truly,

Sledman

[cmkeller]

Pencil me into the pro-lingerie column. I definitely appreciate it when my wife wears the stuff.

Although Victoria's Secret's selection is quickly exhausted and overly priced. We got one or two items there, and have been shopping elsewhere ever since.

[jayron 32]

Though I appreciate the effort of lingerie, and I understand when a woman wears it what it means, I have little visceral reaction to it. My favorite thing to see a woman in is something which looks comfortable and functional: Cotton panties (sans lace), and a cotton bra are great for underthings, and I REALLY dig a woman in sweatpants and a skimpy T-shirt. I guess it's because I'm much more tactile than visual, and sweats feel great. Generally, the more effort it looks like it was for a woman to get into it, the less turned on I am by it.

[CalMeacham]

I'm definitely pro-lingerie. I like things served up in an appetizing manner. That's nt sexist -- I'll willingly serve myself up in whaever way for my wife.


There are certain things I admit I don't understand -- garter belts have never held any appeal for me. I think that a corset can emphasize the female figure wonderfully -- but it looks so uncomfortable that I wouldn't want to insist on it. (And those bust-enhancing get-ups they wear at the Renaissance fairs.........)

[Girl Next Door]

My hubby sounds a lot like jayron. He's never been big on lingerie...he likes tight jeans and a tight t-shirt.

[Show_Biz]

The one thing women don't seem to understand is that ALL lingerie is sexy.

White is cool. Plain is cool. Pictures of Wonder Woman on footie pyjamas is cool.

As long as it looks like it will come off quickly in the clinch.

[Danielinthewolvesden]

No, lads, lingerie is sexy becuase it is something the ladies do especially to look sexy. It ain't the outfit, it is WHY it is worn, so appreciate it, you tyro's. Anytime, ladies, anytime. ;)

[Hamadryad]

I like lingerie...on myself and other women...for this reason:

If the most gorgeous picture can be enhanced with the right frame.
eh hem.

I'm just sayin'.

[JimmyNipples]

A skanky old lady wants to "get it on" with her husband, so she puts on a pair of crotchless panties and lies spread eagle on the bed. The husband walks into the bedroom and she says, " you want some of this?" He says, " Hell no, look at what that thing has done to your underpants!"

Ba Dum Dum

[RTFirefly]

Daniel, I agree with you entirely. (How the #$%&! did that happen?! :))

[rundogrun]

I think lingerie is kind of like the days leading up to Christmas...you know what's coming up, but you still don't want to rush to get there.

[JoltSucker]

I'm in the "wrapping paper" faction.

On my wedding night (yes, we were chaste before marriage, but not thanks to me), my wife wore this cute little lacy number. We quickly found out that stiff scratchy lace is not conducive to foreplay, so off it came. She never wore it again.

I like the bra ads in the paper, and Victoria's Secret catalogs, and the women's underwear section of the Penney's catalog. It was my first form of soft porn growing up. But I don't look at the lingerie, I try to mentally undress the woman in it.

One thing I've figured out is that lingerie is like a miniskirt - some women have the bod to pull it off, some don't. Sooo, if you have the kind of superior bod that allows you to put on a brief show before your man takes it all off, by all means, it's worth the money. But if you're only average, save your money: show up wearing nothing but a fun-loving, sex-hungry attitude.

[sailor]

Some women wear these sexy bras with what seems to be embroidery or something. These may be very sexy if that is all you are wearing but they look plain awful with a T shirt because instead of a nicely rounded breast you get a sort of crumply sight... awful! Take that bra off!

[Eo Echo]

HA!!! There's a girl I work with who wears bras like that all the time. They make her breasts look like great big golf balls.

[Nacho4Sara]

I only wear that fancy lingerie when I know how the night will end up...and I don't wear clothes that show it. :)

Thanks for the input, guys!

[Danielinthewolvesden]

(said in a cheesy accent) eenpuut, you liiike the eenpuut?
;)

[capacitor]

I feel sexy lingerie with my hands, of course. :D I love it on women.

Nacho4Sara: Your guy friends must be either gay or totally uninterested in sex for them not to say they are interested in "the stuff". Or, they were too embarassed to continue your frank talk about underwear. That would be interesting if the latter is the case. Here we are men with the hormones, yet women tend to be more explicit in details when talking about sex. Probably its the talking aspect.

[SPOOFE]

Once, me best friend (Psycho Kitten, here at the 'Dope) showed me a new bra she had just got. I said, "I would very much like to see you in it. And then I'd very much like to see you out of it."

Lingerie is many things... it's the knowledge that someone is trying to turn you on, it's the nice additions to an already nice image, it's that aura of mystery that plays with the imagination, it's the immense joy that comes from taking it off... and the activities that most likely will follow.

However, when it comes to just looking... well, if I know that the "Lingerie Effect" isn't targeted at me, it kind of fizzles.

And Daniel... keep your stinkin' hose to yourself, ya killjoy ::imagines black socks s'more:: :D

[Sassy]

One thing I've figured out is that lingerie is like a miniskirt - some women have the bod to pull it off, some don't. Sooo, if you have the kind of superior bod that allows you to put on a brief show before your man takes it all off, by all means, it's worth the money. But if you're only average, save your money: show up wearing nothing but a fun-loving, sex-hungry attitude.


Goddess, I feel sorry for your wife! Women who think they are only "average" are pretty much never gonna enjoy sex. Do you like thinking of yourself as average when you are in bed with someone? I wear lingerie because it makes me feel sexy, sends the signal that I am in the mood and enhances the whole event by slowing things down. I am, however, in my 40's and sure don't have the body of any VS model - are you telling me I am wrong?

[BarnStormer]

I wanted some once, but couldn't get it in my size.

(FOR A FRAT GAG SHOW, OK? Sheesh! It's not like I wear lingere in real life. I prefer boxers under my gown when I go to boa bars.)

[JoltSucker]

Sassy, my wife is homely looking. She's had two C-sections and a hernia, so her belly is a lumpy mess. She has never been athletic, and always been a little heavy. She's a 36B. We're both 43, and I'm no Fabio either.

I want to make love to her every day, and she knows that.

I think it's more important to women to feel sexy. Men don't feel sexy, they feel horny. I think a woman's need to feel sexy corresponds is analogous to a man's need to feel sexually capable. My sexuality is not hung up in how good I think I am in bed, and I suspect some women's sexuality is not hung up in how sexy they feel.

So, bottom line: different folks, different strokes.