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Gangster Octopus
02-08-2005, 01:12 PM
Master Knows All, Except Combination to Safe

MovieMogul
02-08-2005, 01:42 PM
Movie marquee double bill:

Sperms of Endearment
I'll Do Anyone

(both parodies of James L. Brooks films)

NDP
02-08-2005, 01:52 PM
Headline of Springfield Shopper:

PARADE TO DISTRACT JOYLESS CITIZENRY

Nutty Bunny
02-08-2005, 01:52 PM
Dyslexic Association presents Chevy Chase in "Felch".

borschevsky
02-08-2005, 01:57 PM
Of course, the all-time classic:

Sneed's Feed and Seed (formerly Chuck's)

Max Carnage
02-08-2005, 02:04 PM
...just waiting for the first person to not get the Sneed's joke. happens every time :)

And if ever I'm an apocolypse survivor, I will change a church marquee to:

Today's sermon: Homer Rocks

Darwin's Finch
02-08-2005, 02:09 PM
Pool Sharks: Where the customer is our chum!

plnnr
02-08-2005, 02:10 PM
Springfield Retirement Village

Please don't mention the outside world

BrainGlutton
02-08-2005, 02:11 PM
Springfield University
Est. 1977
Ask about our Latin Motto contest!

fluiddruid
02-08-2005, 02:43 PM
"No Pining"

mobo85
02-08-2005, 02:52 PM
Springfield Cemetary
Come for the funerals
Stay for the pie!

KGS
02-08-2005, 02:53 PM
MONSTRO-MART: Where Shopping Is A Baffling Experience.

Cliffy
02-08-2005, 03:14 PM
The episode two weekends ago had a pretty funny theatre marquee. All I can remember is "3 Fast 3 Furious" and "Breast Camp."

--Cliffy

Pashnish Ewing
02-08-2005, 03:28 PM
SPRINGFIELD CONVENTION CENTER
Candy Convention - Room 1
Candy-shaped Rat Poison Convention - Room 11

Max Torque
02-08-2005, 03:45 PM
A classic: "Blood Bath and Beyond" (gun store)
Wasn't the internet cafe called "Java the Hutt"?

Rodd Hill
02-08-2005, 03:52 PM
Springfield Higher Institute of Technology (Apu is a graduate);

Donner's Party Supplies--Winter Madness Sale

Native American Ice Cream (formerly "Big Chief Crazy Cone")

Springfield Psychiatric Center--"Because there may not be bugs on you"

Gangster Octopus
02-08-2005, 04:00 PM
The episode two weekends ago had a pretty funny theatre marquee. All I can remember is "3 Fast 3 Furious" and "Breast Camp."

--Cliffy

"Kill Bill Mahrer" was another

neutron star
02-08-2005, 04:15 PM
The episode two weekends ago had a pretty funny theatre marquee. All I can remember is "3 Fast 3 Furious" and "Breast Camp."



The others:
Dude Where's My Prostate
Michael Eisner vs. Michael Ovitz
Kill Bill Maher
Explosion 2
Baby Cops 3: Tired and Cranky
Disney's "Stroller Rental: The Movie"

Don Draper
02-08-2005, 04:38 PM
An old one:

VIDEO WORLD
formerly Beta City

Don Draper
02-08-2005, 04:40 PM
Oh yeah, and the classic title of an Itchy & Scratchy cartoon -

"Scar Trek: the next Laceration"

vibrotronica
02-08-2005, 04:49 PM
"...brought to you by Gorman's Ear Guards. GUARD YOUR EARS with Gormans..."

Morbo
02-08-2005, 05:15 PM
Springfield Auto Show
We Salute the America Auto Worker: Now 60% Drug-Free

------------------

Springfield Drive-In
Now Showing
I Spit On Your Grave
I Thumb Through Your Magazines

---------------------

Parking Garage:
PAY & PARK & PAY

---------------------

COME TO HOMER'S BBBQ
The extra B is for BYOBB

"What's that extra B for?"
"That's a typo."

Spudo
02-08-2005, 05:53 PM
At the Reading Digest lunch thing they go do in Washington DC there's a banner on the wall reading "Brevity is... wit".

Patty O'Furniture
02-08-2005, 07:41 PM
From today's episode:

Bart needs to know what badgers eat. Lisa jumps on the internet and pulls up www.whatbadgerseat.com and reports that badgers eat stoats, voles and marmots.

Cisco
02-08-2005, 07:41 PM
Springfield Higher Institute of Technology (Apu is a graduate);

Wasn't it Springfield Heights? The only reason I remember that is because I was watching that episode with my dad - who says he likes the Simpsons but never really watches it and never really laughs when he watches it - when it was new and all of the sudden he started busting out laughing and said "Springfield Heights Institute of Technology!" and I was like, "Huh? Oh!" :D

Manduck
02-08-2005, 08:40 PM
Start Trek XII: So Very Tired

Stringer
02-08-2005, 08:42 PM
On a sign outside a television studio (names of reality shows):

- Suckerpunch
- Mystery Injection
- Tied to a bear

Stringer
02-08-2005, 08:44 PM
Springfield Higher Institute of Technology (Apu is a graduate);

I thought Apu went to "CalTech" - Calcutta Institute of Technology."

buns3000
02-09-2005, 01:02 AM
In Chinatown (can't remember episode), there is a bar called "Yee's Olde Inne".

fiddlesticks
02-09-2005, 01:41 AM
Just last Sunday on the Church sign:

Rapture Threat Level: ORANGE

Scissorjack
02-09-2005, 04:38 AM
Outside the church:

No shirt
No shoes
No salvation

Too many to list - Krusty's Home Pregnancy Test {Warning: May Cause Birth Defects} but a personal favourite is the Springfield Minimum Security Prison, where the gate is ajar.

Marley23
02-09-2005, 04:55 AM
Dyslexic Association presents Chevy Chase in "Felch".
That's from Family Guy.

Arch Trout
02-09-2005, 06:19 AM
Of course, the all-time classic:

Sneed's Feed and Seed (formerly Chuck's)

Not sure I get it.

If it's the joke I think it is then surely it should read:

"Cheed's Feed and Seed (formerly Chuck's)"

That'd make the 'leap' not quite as obtuse
:confused:

interface2x
02-09-2005, 07:29 AM
Nah, it's just changing the "eed" syllable to "uck" in the second to words.

One of my favorites from a Las Vegas casino: Loosest Craps in town!

owlstretchingtime
02-09-2005, 07:44 AM
Nah, it's just changing the "eed" syllable to "uck" in the second to words.

!

Help a berk please - I still don't get it.

Nutty Bunny
02-09-2005, 07:52 AM
That's from Family Guy.

HOLY CRAP!! You're absolutely right! It sounds very Simpsonian though, doesn't it? Doesn't it?? :o

Silentgoldfish
02-09-2005, 08:07 AM
Help a berk please - I still don't get it.

Sneed's Feed and Seed, Formerly Chuck's. So formerly it was Chuck's Fuck and Suck.

chrisk
02-09-2005, 08:12 AM
I thought Apu went to "CalTech" - Calcutta Institute of Technology."

For the record, they're both established in the same ep... "Much Apu About Nothing." Calcutta Tech was his undergraduate alma mater, and he graduated at the top of his class of seven million. :D This qualified him for posgraduate studies at Springfield Heights.

Ike Witt
02-09-2005, 10:07 AM
To honour the birth of our saviour, Try N' Sav will be open Christmas Day.

Sign outside of army base: Proud home of civilian mail opening project.

Springfield Tar Pits - The Best in Tar Entertainment.

And of course, that thing about the University of Minnesota Spankalogical Protocol.

jackelope
02-09-2005, 10:19 AM
MONSTRO-MART: Where Shopping Is A Baffling Experience.Nitpick: It's "Where shopping is a baffling ordeal."

usar_jag
02-09-2005, 10:44 AM
Outside of the church:

We Welcome Pissed-Off Catholics.

PaperBlob
02-09-2005, 10:59 AM
This week's sermon: There's Something About the Virgin Mary

Krusty Brand Imitation Gruel: 9 out of 10 orphans can't tell the difference!

Hi, I'm Troy McClure. You may have seen me in such self-help videos as: "Smoke Yourself Thin." and "Get Confident, Stupid!"

Ike Witt
02-09-2005, 11:12 AM
Jebediah Springfield Park

8:00 Medfly Spraying
8:15 Sprinfield Pops
8:30 Spraying - 2nd Pass

Ludovic
02-09-2005, 11:50 AM
My first thought: (headline after Marge spent the night listening to Homer's snore):

Sleep important, experts say.

Marley23
02-09-2005, 03:32 PM
HOLY CRAP!! You're absolutely right! It sounds very Simpsonian though, doesn't it? Doesn't it?? :o
Sort of, yeah. I think a "Feltch" joke is Family Guy through and through. ;)

F. U. Shakespeare
02-09-2005, 03:53 PM
When they stayed at the beach, Homer went to buy fireworks at the convenience store. The Apu-clone owner led Homer into the room where the fireworks were kept. Two that I remember:

"Yangtse Doodle Dandy"

"Whistling Menace"

When they went to Baltimore's Inner Harbor, one store I remember:

"Malaria Zone"

The sign at a museum:

"Truth. Knowledge. Gift shop."

The motto at the military school Bart and Lisa attended:

"A heritage of tradition"

It's not the verbal content, but I love the sign at the "Merry Widow" life insurance agency, where Homer went when he ate the blowfish and expected to die. It had a buzzy, two-frame-loop neon animation of a widow standing respectfully beside a grave, then leaping into the air and throwing the flowers away.

Morbo
02-09-2005, 04:01 PM
It's not the verbal content, but I love the sign at the "Merry Widow" life insurance agency, where Homer went when he ate the blowfish and expected to die. It had a buzzy, two-frame-loop neon animation of a widow standing respectfully beside a grave, then leaping into the air and throwing the flowers away.

I thought in the second frame the widow was dancing on the grave and waving a stack of cash.

Don Draper
02-09-2005, 04:14 PM
Springfield Standardized Testing Processing Plant
Controlling Your Destiny Since 1917


More movie marquees:

So You've Entered the Matrix, Charlie Brown
A Matrix Christmas Carol
the Fashions of the Christ
the Inedible Bulk

F. U. Shakespeare
02-09-2005, 04:14 PM
Could be -- it's been a while since I've seen it.

Off-topic, but I always mix that one up with the time when he needed heart surgery and was trying to buy medical insurance.

The salesman asked him if he drank: "I do enjoy a snifter of port at Christmas".

Ike Witt
02-09-2005, 04:41 PM
When they stayed at the beach, Homer went to buy fireworks at the convenience store. The Apu-clone owner led Homer into the room where the fireworks were kept. Two that I remember:

"Yangtse Doodle Dandy"

"Whistling Menace"



There was also "Play more with Claymore".

msmith537
02-09-2005, 05:18 PM
You must be at least this swarthy to get in

buns3000
02-09-2005, 06:11 PM
Marge's coupon - "Free tattoo with every tattoo removal".

mobo85
02-09-2005, 06:16 PM
the Inedible Bulk

This one was actually The Unwatchable Hulk.

VENUS BRIDAL SALON
Not affiliated with the planet Venus

Biffy the Elephant Shrew
02-09-2005, 06:35 PM
This one was actually The Unwatchable Hulk.

Marvel Comics themselves used "The Inedible Bulk" in the '60s in their self-parody Not Brand Ecch comic.

Bryan Ekers
02-09-2005, 07:07 PM
Main Headline, about Homer's charity work: BIG FAT MAN HAS BIG FAT HEART

Secondary headline: LITTLE THIN MAN ARRESTED IN ROBBERY


Apu was first in his class of seven million at Cal Tech, then went for post-grad study under John Frink at Springfield Heights.

F. U. Shakespeare
02-09-2005, 07:50 PM
And of course, the M-320.

In the Apu clone's words, "Celebrate your country's independence by blowing up a small part of it".

Frostillicus
02-09-2005, 09:18 PM
Floats seen in the Springfield gay pride parade:

The Velvet Mafia

Lesbians of the Caribbean

:D

Jeff Lichtman
02-10-2005, 01:16 AM
Church sign after a natural disaster: God Welcomes His Victims.

Marley23
02-10-2005, 01:44 AM
In an episode early this season (set two years in the future), the headline in Homer's New Delhi Times was "Steve Barnes Opens Convenience Store." That came a few minutes after Apu confessed to Homer that his "new dream" was escaping his wife and family and returning to India to open another convenience store.

Othersider
02-10-2005, 01:48 AM
"It was the most beautiful, most expensive train ever built - The Spruce Caboose!
Some people said it was too big to stay on the tracks. Hehe...they were right."

Raygun99
02-10-2005, 02:43 AM
SPRINGFIELD CONVENTION CENTER
Candy Convention - Room 1
Candy-shaped Rat Poison Convention - Room 11

You missed a joke. The Candy Convention was in "Room 1!"

Max Torque
02-10-2005, 08:24 AM
Bart's patches when he was a scout:

Archery
Debt Collecting
Embalming
T.V. Trivia
Patch Forgery

Don Draper
02-10-2005, 10:15 AM
Not a marquee sign, but a great throwaway line. It happens when Bart & Lisa (while searching for a supposedly dead Krusty the Klown) walks into Sailor Guy's store, while he's on the phone:

SAILOR GUY (into the phone): Arrrr, but I have customers and must go. Call me later, Ishmael.

scule
02-10-2005, 11:15 AM
When the family goes to Australia, for Bart to apologize, the parliament building is the front of the Austrian parliament, but says:

al
Parliament-haus der Austr^ia

Also in that episode, the sign in the gift shop where Lisa wants to buy the diggeridoo (sp?):

Pedro sez "Eez good Koala-t"

scule
02-10-2005, 11:18 AM
Ok, well the al is supposed to be above the ^ in Austr^ia, but didn't seem to come out that way (as though they had stolen or copied the Austrian parliament and scratched in the correction half-assedly).

quixotic78
02-10-2005, 03:10 PM
Not a marquee sign, but a great throwaway line. It happens when Bart & Lisa (while searching for a supposedly dead Krusty the Klown) walks into Sailor Guy's store, while he's on the phone:

SAILOR GUY (into the phone): Arrrr, but I have customers and must go. Call me later, Ishmael.
Well, there's a taffy shop called "Call me Delishmael" in the episode where Homer won't give his kidney to his father and then goes to sea with a bunch of weirdos. So there's your sign connection :)