View Full Version : Another online personals profile critique thread
I need to get over the end of my (non-)relationship and start looking again, so here goes:
Of course I welcome others to post their profiles for criticism (and/or example) as well.
03-22-2005, 05:41 PM
I'll save the in-depth critiques for others, but I have to say that what you have right now is pretty good. You come across as articulate, smart, and it looks like you have some intriguing interests.
If you make any changes to improve it, it'll be icing on the cake. When I was doing the personals thing, yours would have been a refreshing change of pace from the ALL CAPS I CANT' SPEEL kinds of profiles that are out there.
03-22-2005, 06:10 PM
I agree with scout - you do come across as very articulate. I had to look really hard to find anything you might even consider changing. The only things I can come up with so far are:
-perhaps you should focus less on being a geek in your self summary. Personally, I don't think you sound geeky at all. Then again, I married a software architect, so what do I know? Anyway, it might make you appear more confident and less self-effacing if you focus a little less on that, and more on what you enjoy. You currently have:
"Most people know me as a space scientist who likes riding weird bicycles and has other geeky hobbies such as photography and amateur astronomy. I don't really identify with the stereotypical nerd culture though (I'm still not sure what D&D is). I was born in Japan but I've moved around quite a bit, and I'm definitely more comfortable in English-speaking countries."
Perhaps you could say something like:
"Even though I was born in Japan, I moved around quite a bit all my life. I'm a big fan of learning about new places and people, though I have to admit that I'm most comfortable in English-speaking countries. My friends think of me as a space scientist who enjoys bike riding far too much. I also enjoy photography and amateur astronomy. (Oh, sure, you might think I sound geeky, but I'm still not sure what D&D is.) [insert any fun-sounding additional info here]"
-add another item to the "Six things I couldn't do without section" (unless I can't count, which is very possible since I've had two glasses of wine, I think you just have five)
Yup, that's all I got.
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