Next time you fart in bed...

[Loopydude]

...just tell your sweetie that you're trying to help her/him get a good night's sleep.

Stink bomb gas puts mice into suspended animation. (http://www.newscientist.com/article.ns?id=dn7294)

[Lobsang]

Ok, but I really don't know where she lives. Or who she is for that matter.

[Flander]

Dutch oven.