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View Full Version : Answer that damn thing, or turn it off!


AHunter3
07-21-2005, 02:27 PM
Hey, you! With the cell phone, with the incoming call!

Yeah, so this isn't a theatre, fine, I'll grant the efficiency and convenience to your callers of you being accessible via cell phone. I've never owned one and have no urge to get one, but I wouldn't argue that they don't have their place.

But...

WHAT THE FUCK is with you pulling the thing out and holding it in the palm of your hands while it continues to beeble beeble beeble la dotti dah deedle its way through your fucking triple-annoying diarrhea-squirting ringtone TWICE before you deign to flip it open and say "Kirk here" or whatever you folks do with those damn things?

Like curved shards of broken perfume-bottle glass glitting deeper into the soles your bleeding feet as you try to hobble-hop your way to tubside, those horrid jingly-smarmy ringtones cut right into my ears and brain. ANSWER THE FUCKING PHONE! Or if you feel you need to ponder the advisability of taking this call for a moment or two, SWITCH OFF THE FUCKING SOUND, there's a switch somewhere, "vibrate mode" or some such thing, use it!

You got a finite allotment of beebles. I don't know how many you get but it's definitely limited, and when you let it beeble one beeble too many I'm snatching it, running down the hall screaming "BOMB!!!", and I'm throwing it in the toilet.

Necros
07-21-2005, 02:36 PM
They're waiting for the name of whomever is calling to show up on their Caller ID before they answer it. Otherwise known as "screening one's calls".

FinnAgain
07-21-2005, 02:38 PM
Decaf.

Revtim
07-21-2005, 02:38 PM
The name doesn't come instantly on all cell phones? It does on mine.

velvetjones
07-21-2005, 02:41 PM
Waiting? What waiting? When my phone rings the caller ID happens simultaneously. Maybe he's just a slow reader.

Don't get me started on ring tones. Personally I just want my phone to ring like a phone or vibrate. I don't want it to sing me a song or play me a ditty or chant or recite poetry or warble like a turtledove, I just want it to ring. Call me old-fashioned.

brownie55
07-21-2005, 02:46 PM
Waiting? What waiting? When my phone rings the caller ID happens simultaneously. Maybe he's just a slow reader.

Don't get me started on ring tones. Personally I just want my phone to ring like a phone or vibrate. I don't want it to sing me a song or play me a ditty or chant or recite poetry or warble like a turtledove, I just want it to ring. Call me old-fashioned.
I guess you don't appreciate my "When Johnny Comes Marching Home" tone? Sorry, I'll change it now.

Necros
07-21-2005, 02:47 PM
I just tested, and it takes about three or four seconds for my Caller ID to show up on my cell phone. Of course, mine's always on vibrate, so it doesn't disturb others. I know that there is also a delay with my home phone.

Maybe the FBI is tapping my phones! :eek:

Revtim
07-21-2005, 02:51 PM
I know that there is also a delay with my home phone.

Maybe the FBI is tapping my phones! :eek:The delay on the home phone is because the info is sent after the 1st ring, IIRC.

I have no idea why there's a delay on a cell phone call. You wouldn't still be on one of the very first analog networks, are you? Are they even still around?

Jackmannii
07-21-2005, 02:53 PM
WHAT THE FUCK is with you pulling the thing out and holding it in the palm of your hands while it continues to beeble beeble beeble la dotti dah deedle its way through your fucking triple-annoying diarrhea-squirting ringtone TWICE before you deign to flip it open and say "Kirk here" or whatever you folks do with those damn things?If TWICE drives you mad mad mad, what would you have done in the restaurant the other day when a nearby cellphone slave's device went doodle-beep la-da beeble beeble beeble HALF A DOZEN TIMES before you finally COULDN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE and cried out in an anguished voice STOP THE MADNESS!!!! causing everyone else in your section to glance over in amazement or pretend that there was something fascinating in the direction of their shoes, hmm? HMMMMM??!?!?!?

Necros
07-21-2005, 02:55 PM
I have no idea why there's a delay on a cell phone call. You wouldn't still be on one of the very first analog networks, are you? Are they even still around?

Heck if I know. It's a trimode phone, not a GSM one. Not sure if that makes a difference, as I should be on a digital network where I am now.

monica
07-21-2005, 03:10 PM
Okay. Let's write down some cellphone ettiquette, here.

First of all, if at all possible, turn off your phone. I understand that this is not always feasible; heck, I have to leave mine on, sometimes. If possible, put it on vibrate. If you are unable to deal with this, and MUST have your phone on vibrate, please follow these rules:

1) When your cellphone goes off, you may not ignore it. Answer the damn thing, or at least turn off the ringer. If you don't feel it necessary to pick up the phone when it rings, then you don't need it on in the first place.

2) Do not pick up your phone and start into your nice loud phone conversation. You may use a low voice to utter the sentence "Hey, I'm in such-and-such a place, hang on for a sec while I go outside," and then you must shut up until you are in a place that will not allow you to disturb other customers. "Hey, can I call you back later?" is also acceptable.

3) When you are checking out, you may not speak on the cellphone while handling transactions with the cashier. This is incredibly rude. You may repeat "Hey, I'll call you back in a few minutes," but that is all.

4) Indoor voices, people. I've seen five-year-olds who understand this concept better than many cell-phone users. I really don't want to listen to your screamed cell-phone conversation.

5) Students: Stop text-messaging in class. Honestly, this is getting ridiculous. It won't be fair to the rest of us when your antics get cellphones banned for all students.

monica
07-21-2005, 03:14 PM
Oh yes, and a quick note to my rather clueless father:

My mother leaves her cellphone on vibrate when we go to the movies in case there's an emergency or something at home. When you called her the other day, she abided by all of the cellphone ettiquette rules listed above, quickly exiting the theatre to take your call in case it was important. Yay mom! However, Dad, your reason for calling and interrupting, which was asking what was for dinner, was not appropriate. Really, would it kill you to wait until she got home to ask? Or *gasp* volunteer to handle dinner yourself instead of relying on her?*



*Just so long as you don't cook over open flames- I remember the last time you tried to "help" me and caught the food on fire.

Anne Neville
07-21-2005, 03:14 PM
Don't get me started on ring tones. Personally I just want my phone to ring like a phone or vibrate. I don't want it to sing me a song or play me a ditty or chant or recite poetry or warble like a turtledove, I just want it to ring. Call me old-fashioned.

I only use ringtones because I don't have a very good ability to find where a sound is coming from. So, if I use a standard ringtone, I don't know if it's my phone or someone else's ringing.

Revtim
07-21-2005, 03:23 PM
Heck if I know. It's a trimode phone, not a GSM one. Not sure if that makes a difference, as I should be on a digital network where I am now.I don't know the digital mobile phone protocols, but every other digital telephony protocol I've worked with sends the call ID info in the same message that would tell the phone to ring. In other words, If the phone knows to ring, it should already know who's making it ring. Strange stuff.

cowgirl
07-21-2005, 03:48 PM
Okay. Let's write down some cellphone ettiquette, here ...

For the love of all that is holy, public transit is NOT an appropriate place to scroll through all your possible ringtones.

The first time this happened I got all steamed and then forgot about it, thinking it was an isolated incident. I mean, who but a uniquely inconsiderate fool would do such a thing?

My mistake. It's happened so often now I have lost count. There are more uniquely inconsiderate fools than I thought possible, and I have long been aware of vast quantities and varieties of inconsiderate fools.

Revtim
07-21-2005, 03:56 PM
For the love of all that is holy, public transit is NOT an appropriate place to scroll through all your possible ringtones.

The first time this happened I got all steamed and then forgot about it, thinking it was an isolated incident. I mean, who but a uniquely inconsiderate fool would do such a thing?

My mistake. It's happened so often now I have lost count. There are more uniquely inconsiderate fools than I thought possible, and I have long been aware of vast quantities and varieties of inconsiderate fools.This sounds like quite an over-reaction to me. In a public place, shouldn't you expect noise? Is it that they hit your ringtone, and you get fooled into thinking your phone is ringing? Not sure what the big deal is.

cowgirl
07-21-2005, 04:29 PM
This sounds like quite an over-reaction to me. In a public place, shouldn't you expect noise? Is it that they hit your ringtone, and you get fooled into thinking your phone is ringing? Not sure what the big deal is.

Cell phones come with a number of "default" ring tones, and the user of said phone needs to pick one.

To do this, they often scroll through the possibilities. As in:

Phone: Bleepity bleepity bleep
User, to self: No, I don't like that one.
Phone: Boop-boop-e-doop
User: No good
Phone: Doo do do doo do do doo
User: Nope
Phone: Rama-lama-ding-dong
User: Hmm ...
Phone: [William Tell overture, in bleep form]
User: Not good enough
Phone: Ring! Ring!
User: Uncool
Phone:Ringalingalingalingaling
User: Possibility.
Phone: [Beethoven's Ninth]
User: Bah.
Phone: Rama-lama-ding-dong
User: I dunno ... maybe I like
Phone: Boop-boop-e-doop
User: Wait, have I heard this one yet?
Phone: [That annoying Outkast song]
User: I can't decide between
Phone: Rama-lama-ding-dong
User: and
Phone: Ringalingalingalingaling
User to friend: Hey, what do you think of
Phone: [That annoying Outkast song]
Friend: Hey, listen to the one I've got
Friend's Phone: [that annoying Jay-Z song]

...

and so on, ad nauseum.

Tastes of Chocolate
07-21-2005, 05:59 PM
Okay. Let's write down some cellphone ettiquette, here.

First of all, if at all possible, turn off your phone. I understand that this is not always feasible; heck, I have to leave mine on, sometimes. If possible, put it on vibrate. If you are unable to deal with this, and MUST have your phone on vibrate, please follow these rules:

1) When your cellphone goes off, you may not ignore it. Answer the damn thing, or at least turn off the ringer. If you don't feel it necessary to pick up the phone when it rings, then you don't need it on in the first place.

2) Do not pick up your phone and start into your nice loud phone conversation. You may use a low voice to utter the sentence "Hey, I'm in such-and-such a place, hang on for a sec while I go outside," and then you must shut up until you are in a place that will not allow you to disturb other customers. "Hey, can I call you back later?" is also acceptable.

3) When you are checking out, you may not speak on the cellphone while handling transactions with the cashier. This is incredibly rude. You may repeat "Hey, I'll call you back in a few minutes," but that is all.

4) Indoor voices, people. I've seen five-year-olds who understand this concept better than many cell-phone users. I really don't want to listen to your screamed cell-phone conversation.

5) Students: Stop text-messaging in class. Honestly, this is getting ridiculous. It won't be fair to the rest of us when your antics get cellphones banned for all students.

6) Do not leave your cellphone, turned on, on your desk, while you go into a 2 hr meeting. I'm not going to answer it, except to tell someone to go fuck off.

Dark Side of the Floyd
07-21-2005, 06:20 PM
Cell phones come with a number of "default" ring tones, and the user of said phone needs to pick one.

To do this, they often scroll through the possibilities. As in:

Phone: Bleepity bleepity bleep
User, to self: No, I don't like that one.
Phone: Boop-boop-e-doop
User: No good
Phone: Doo do do doo do do doo
User: Nope
Phone: Rama-lama-ding-dong
User: Hmm ...
Phone: [William Tell overture, in bleep form]
User: Not good enough
Phone: Ring! Ring!
User: Uncool
Phone:Ringalingalingalingaling
User: Possibility.
Phone: [Beethoven's Ninth]
User: Bah.
Phone: Rama-lama-ding-dong
User: I dunno ... maybe I like
Phone: Boop-boop-e-doop
User: Wait, have I heard this one yet?
Phone: [That annoying Outkast song]
User: I can't decide between
Phone: Rama-lama-ding-dong
User: and
Phone: Ringalingalingalingaling
User to friend: Hey, what do you think of
Phone: [That annoying Outkast song]
Friend: Hey, listen to the one I've got
Friend's Phone: [that annoying Jay-Z song]

...

and so on, ad nauseum.


Yeah, well over here, there are no shortage of annoying people who have ringtones on their Nextels or Boost phones.

So on the bus I get:

*bleepideep*
Asshole 1:(in the back of the bus) Yea son, w'sup?
*eep!*
Asshole 2 (somewhere else): Nuttin much... yo where you at?
*bleepideep*
Asshole 1: On da bus, n'nat shit.
*eep!*

And the conversation continues.


You know how in the 80's, people used to carry around boomboxes? Well, people are carrying their cellphones around with them, blasting their damn hippity hoppity music, scanning through them on the bus and having their friends comment ["yo son, dat shit's hot... play it louda" "Naa... that shit's wack"].

Invariably, they'll say "Play it louda".



And so I scream inwardly.


Damn kids.

Dark Side of the Floyd
07-21-2005, 06:21 PM
Goddamn smiley.

Snickers
07-22-2005, 02:54 PM
You got a finite allotment of beebles. I don't know how many you get but it's definitely limited, and when you let it beeble one beeble too many I'm snatching it, running down the hall screaming "BOMB!!!", and I'm throwing it in the toilet.

This, people, this paragraph is genius. I love this image.

:D

minor7flat5
07-22-2005, 04:59 PM
The one that gets me is business meetings.

Here we all are, talking important stuff (well, at least some folks feel it's important stuff), with people in three other states conferenced in and doing a Webex, when all of a sudden some fairly senior person receives a call, treating us to some totally goofy ring tone that is more appropriate for a college kid than a senior manager or director. The person usually apologies, runs out the door, and takes the call. What gets me is what follows: everyone heard it; everyone thought "what a bozo"; yet, no one then thnks to put their own phone on vibrate at that very moment. Five minutes later, another bozo gets a call.

Maybe it's just me, and I'm not one for stodgy suit-and-tie professionalism, but I think those ringtones really are unprofessional and have no place in a business context.

Folks, just put them on vibrate whenever you're in a meeting. It isn't that hard. In fact, I switch mine to vibrate before I slip it in my pocket when I leave for work. It only goes off vibrate when I leave work.

Gala Matrix Fire
07-22-2005, 05:24 PM
Now that email and text messaging has been invented, isn't it high time to dis-invent the telephone? I hate the damn things.

Pullet
07-22-2005, 05:56 PM
Now that email and text messaging has been invented, isn't it high time to dis-invent the telephone? I hate the damn things.

I've only just trained my parents to use email. Training them for text messaging and untraining them on phones would take forever!