View Full Version : Favorite Mamet quotes.

08-03-2005, 06:34 AM
Got any favorite Mamet quotes & their vehicles?

From Spartan, "Set your motherfucker to receive."

A funny one from State & Main. . .

Guy #1 in diner: Well. . .it takes all kinds.

Guy #2 in diner: Oh, is that what it takes? I was wondering what it took.

08-03-2005, 07:26 AM
From Heist:

"My motherfucker is so cool, when he goes to sleep, sheep count him."

"Everyone wants money. That's why they call it money"

"How long is a Chinaman's name."

From Ronin (guessing a bit here, but he did do significant re-writing):

"Everyone's your brother till the rent comes due"

"Everyone wants to go to the party, no-one wants to stay and clean up"

"What could have been conducted in a collegial atmosphere, is fucked into a cocked hat"

From Spanish Prisoner:

"We are all humans, and as humans we must dream, and when we dream, we dream of money"

"Money - what good did it ever do anybody?" "Well, it's useful if you want to buy stuff".

08-03-2005, 07:51 AM
amrussel beat me to my favorite quote. I use it all the time, too. I've been saying it as needs, not wants.

"Everyone needs money. That's why they call it money"

I also use 'cute a bucket full of kittens' on occasion, too.

Until this thread, I hadn't even heard of Spartan. It's going on my Netflix queue now. Thanks!

08-03-2005, 08:43 AM
Second prize is a set of steak knives. Third prize is you're fired.

08-03-2005, 11:36 AM
"At this point, we're not sure." - About Last Night (movie version of Sexual Perversity In Chicago)

08-03-2005, 11:46 AM
You ever take a dump made you feel like you'd just slept for twelve hours?

08-03-2005, 01:08 PM
From Gelngarry Glen Ross:

"What's my name? Fuck you that's my name!"


08-03-2005, 01:16 PM
"Second prize: a set of steak knives."

08-03-2005, 01:17 PM
Second prize is a set of steak knives. Third prize is you're fired.

Sorry. I posted before seeing this one.

08-03-2005, 01:43 PM
From State & Main:

Well, that happened.

08-03-2005, 01:49 PM
From Spartan:

"In the city it's always a reflection. In the woods, always a sound."
"What about the desert?"
"You don't want to go in the desert."

08-03-2005, 01:55 PM

DeVito: "Wait! Don't you want to hear my last words?"
Hackman: "I just did." <shoots him>

08-03-2005, 02:39 PM
From About Last Night, assuming it was from the original Mamet

"You know, those firemen make out like bandits!"

I know it's not as snappy as the other examples, but in context... hilarious.

08-03-2005, 03:10 PM
Malone: You wanna know how you do it? Here's how, they pull a knife, you pull a gun. He sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue. That's the Chicago way, and that's how you get Capone! Now do you want to do that? Are you ready to do that?
Ness: I have sworn to capture this man with all legal powers at my disposal and I will do so.
Malone: Well the Lord hates a coward. Do you know what a blood oath is Mr. Ness?
Ness: Yes.
Malone: Good, cause you just took one.

Ricky Roma: "Patel"? Fuck you. Fucking Shiva handed this guy a million dollars, said "Sign the deal!" he wouldn't sign. And the god Vishnu too. Fuck you, John! You know your business, I know mine. Your business is being an asshole.

Curtis: My name's Curtis.
Scott: Do I need to know that? If I want camaraderie, I'll join the Masons.

Mickey: Do you know who the attorney is for the defense? Ed Concannon!
Frank: He's a good man...
Mickey: He's a good man? Heh, he's the Prince of fucking Darkness! He'll have people testifying they saw her waterskiing up in Marblehead last summer. Frank, don't *fuck* with this case!

Hoffa: If a guy's close to you, you can't slight 'im. You can't slight that guy. A real grievance can be resolved; differences can be resolved. But an imaginary hurt, a slight - that motherfucker gonna hate you 'til the day he dies.

Sullivan: The FBI couldn't find Joe Frazier in a bowl of rice.

Mike: I'm from the United States of kiss-my-ass.

08-03-2005, 05:25 PM
PUT...that COFFEE... DOWN! Coffee is for closers.


08-03-2005, 05:29 PM
From House of Games: "Oh, you're a bad pony. And I'm not gonna bet on you."

08-03-2005, 08:55 PM
"Nice guy? I don't give a shit. Good father? Fuck you! Go home and play with your kids."

Stranger On A Train
08-03-2005, 10:42 PM
"I'm from the United States of kiss-my-ass." -- House of Games

Joe: "He ain't gonna shoot me?"
Fran: "No."
Joe: "Then he hadn't ought to point a gun at me. It's insincere." -- Heist

"It's not a lie. It's a gift for fiction." -- State & Main

"Never liked the Swiss, they make them little clocks, these two cocksuckers come out of 'em with these little hammers, hit each other on the head. What kind of sick mentality is that?" -- Heist

Spence: "You worried about saving your own skin?"
Sam: "Yeah, I am. It covers my body." -- Ronin

"Everybody makes their own fun. If you don't make it yourself, it isn't fun. It's entertainment." -- State & Main

Joseph Turner White: "What's an associate producer credit?"
Bill Smith: "It's what you give to your secretary instead of a raise." -- State & Main

"You want an ambush? Look at that, I just ambushed you with a fuckin' cup of coffee!" -- Ronin

Spence: "You ever kill anybody?"
Sam: "I hurt somebody's feelings once." -- Ronin

"Worry is like interest paid in advance on a debt that never comes due." -- The Spanish Prisoner

Stanley Motss: "The President will be a hero. He brought peace."
Conrad 'Connie' Brean: "But there was never a war."
Stanley Motss: "All the greater accomplishment." -- Wag The Dog

"Nobody going on a business trip would have been missed if he never arrived." -- The Spanish Prisoner

Conrad 'Connie' Brean: "What's the thing people remember about the Gulf War? A bomb falling down a chimney. Let me tell you something: I was in the building where we filmed that with a 10-inch model made out of Legos."
Stanley Motss: "Is that true?"
Conrad 'Connie' Brean: "Who the hell's to say?" -- Wag The Dog

"It's like a plumber: if you do it OK, nobody notices, if you fuck up, it gets full of shit." -- Wag The Dog

Ricky Roma: "How was her crumbcake? Homemade?"
Shelley Levene: "Hmm? Oh... store bought."
Ricky Roma: "Fuck her." -- Glengerry Glen Ross

"Fuck you. That's my name. You know why, mister? 'Cause you drove a Hyundai to get here tonight, I drove an eighty thousand dollar BMW. *That's* my name." -- Glengerry Glen Ross

"Put that coffee down. Coffee is for closers." -- Glengerry Glen Ross

"All train compartments smell vaguely of shit." -- Glengerry Glen Ross

"You wanna know how you do it? Here's how, they pull a knife, you pull a gun. He sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue. That's the Chicago way, and that's how you get Capone! Now do you want to do that? Are you ready to do that?" -- The Untouchables

"Isn't that just like a wop? Brings a knife to a gun fight." -- The Untouchables

Okay, I'll stop now.


don't ask
08-04-2005, 12:21 AM
Personally I like the joke best.

A woman leaving a theatre is accosted by a beggar. She pompously tells him, ""Neither a borrower nor a lender be.' --William Shakespeare."
The beggar replies: "Yeah? 'Fuck you.'--David Mamet."

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