Cats are the epitome of grace and coordination...?

[picunurse]

Indeed.. :dubious:

This morning, while I was dressing, Max was on the bed playing with my shoe. He was lying on his side, his back to the edge of the bed. He started to roll, realized he would fall and tried to catch himself. He failed. He landed on his back, the shoe landed on top of him, so he kicked it as he righted himself. The shoe landed on his back, so he slapped it, making it smack him in the nose. I wish I'd had the camera.
He did walk away with all the dignity he could muster, after being beaten up by a shoe.

[conurepete]

This afternoon I got to watch my cat, who was laying on her stomach, sloowly list to the left and fall the hell off of a wide chair. It made me feel better about being home sick with stomach flu.

[Mama Tiger]

After watching every cat I've ever had commit acts of sheer clumsiness, I've come to the opinion that it's not that cats are actually more graceful; it's just that they refuse to acknowledge it when they do something clumsy. So their grace is in moving on from their klutziness, not in avoiding it in the first place.

[Kalhoun]

I've got a couple good ones and a couple bad ones. Echo falls off the back of the toilet, off the counter, slides across the floor and crashes into the wall, like...all the time. Domino is too fat to be really cat-like. He's more like a goofy little dog. The other two have the grace thing pretty much knocked.

[Tastes of Chocolate]

I once watched my cat slowly slide off the back of a sofa, right into a garbage can, tail first. My SO and I just looked at each other and cracked up.

[pinkfreud]

Cats sure can find some weird and awkward sleeping positions. One of our kitties, the late Elvis Pussley, used to like to crawl up onto some storage bins for electronic parts and drape himself across them. Then, bit by bit, his hindquarters would come sagging down, and he ended up like this (http://www.mortalwombat.com/ElvisPussley/Hangover.jpg). There were soft pillows and cushy blankets all over the house, and Elvis picked a set of storage bins for his napping-spot. Cats are so strange.

[Beware of Doug]

After watching every cat I've ever had commit acts of sheer clumsiness, I've come to the opinion that it's not that cats are actually more graceful; it's just that they refuse to acknowledge it when they do something clumsy. So their grace is in moving on from their klutziness, not in avoiding it in the first place.Cats exist in a world free of consequences. They do not accept fault for anything. If a human being consistently knocked over lamps or fell off chairs, s/he would get negative feedback, understand it, and quickly internalize a feeling of "I better not do this. I need to be a less careful person." Refusal to acknowledge the fact would only bring more negative feedback. Whereas a cat can smash a priceless piece of antique pottery at 5pm and still meow unashamedly for supper at 7.

[Omegaman]

Cats exist in a world free of consequences. They do not accept fault for anything. If a human being consistently knocked over lamps or fell off chairs, s/he would get negative feedback, understand it, and quickly internalize a feeling of "I better not do this. I need to be a less careful person." Refusal to acknowledge the fact would only bring more negative feedback. Whereas a cat can smash a priceless piece of antique pottery at 5pm and still meow unashamedly for supper at 7.


WELL SAID ! CLAP CLAP CLAP !

[Morgyn]

One of my favourite quotes about cats, said by Orbifold.

Somehow, cats have this reputation as being elegant, graceful, aloof, and more intelligent than the average dog. Clearly, somewhere cats have a PR firm that could sell shoes to snakes.

[mrald]

Fonzie cat has taken to drinking out of the toliet, why I don't know, but I walked in and caught him early this morning (1 am). I don't know if me turning on the light scared him or what but he slipped and fell in. Keep in mind he is a very large boy,, and has never been graceful. By the time he escaped from the evil bowl, he pulled towels off the rack, knocked the shampoo of the bathtub and folded up the rug.

Heh, then the bugger got a real bath.... he still isn't speaking to me.

[Gorgon Heap]

When I was a kid I once chased a neighborhood stray out of the yard and watched it rush directly into the street where it was instantly run over.

[Jenny Haniver]

(Pointedly ignoring Gorgon Heap's post)

My cat once fell in to the toilet and pulled the lid down on top of himself in the process.

He used to jump on the back of the toilet so he could watch me get ready in the bathroom mirror every morning, but on this occasion he shorted the jump. As he fell, his paws grabbed at the top of the toilet for purchase, but instead got the lip of the toilet lid.

Splash. Clank. MRRRREEEEOWRRRRR!!!!

[Anaamika]

Fonzie cat has taken to drinking out of the toliet, why I don't know, but I walked in and caught him early this morning (1 am). I don't know if me turning on the light scared him or what but he slipped and fell in. Keep in mind he is a very large boy,, and has never been graceful. By the time he escaped from the evil bowl, he pulled towels off the rack, knocked the shampoo of the bathtub and folded up the rug.

Heh, then the bugger got a real bath.... he still isn't speaking to me.
He isn't speaking to you?

I wouldn't be speaking to my cat if it had caused such a mess at 1 AM on a work night and forced me to wash it. Grrr.

[Sunrazor]

Our black and white splotched longhair Estes loves to nap in the window sill in our bedroom. The other afternoon, while I was working on the computer there, unaware that Estes was napping, he fell out of the window sill. It startled me so badly I almost wet myself. But I got to thinking: With all the videos we've seen of sleeping cats sliding off their perches, does it ever happen in the wild? I mean, does a puma ever crawl up into a tree, nod off and slide out of the tree?

[Honey]

When I was a kid I once chased a neighborhood stray out of the yard and watched it rush directly into the street where it was instantly run over.

Why would you come into a lighthearted thread where everyone is having a good time and spew out something like this.

Shame on you. :mad:

[CalMeacham]

"The Fog Creeps in on Little Cat Feet"



Yeah, right. This teaches me that Carl Sandburg never owned a cat. Especially at 3 in the morning.



http://www.du.edu/~jobrinso/poetry/sandburg_fog.html

[Gorgon Heap]

"Lighthearted?" I thought we were simply stating cases of cats not being as dextrous and agile as they are said to be.

Not having any "cute" stories to share, I told the only cat story I had.

Ah, well. Live and learn. I'll avoid cat discussions from now on.

[Mindfield]

"Lighthearted?" I thought we were simply stating cases of cats not being as dextrous and agile as they are said to be.

I think there's a bit of a difference between cats misstepping or being so stone-dead asleep that they don't catch themselves slipping off the couch, and a cat whose sense of caution is overridden by panicked fight-or-flight instinct causing it to flee straight into mortal danger.

Basic rule of comedic thumb: Tragedy kills comedy.

[Gorgon Heap]

I misinterprited the intent of the thread. I apologize, and if the mods wish to eradicate my previous post, by all means do so.

[mrald]

He isn't speaking to you?

I wouldn't be speaking to my cat if it had caused such a mess at 1 AM on a work night and forced me to wash it. Grrr.


I am a night shift worker, thus nocturnal even on my days off. I was already up and looking for something to do anyway. Why not have a laugh at the cat's expense? :D

[matt_mcl]

Ever had your cat do the running-long-jump thing onto the table, not realize that the tablecloth is not secured, and skid directly into a big pile of cat-and-tablecloth on the floor at the other end?

I have.

[mrald]

Our black and white splotched longhair Estes loves to nap in the window sill in our bedroom. The other afternoon, while I was working on the computer there, unaware that Estes was napping, he fell out of the window sill. It startled me so badly I almost wet myself. But I got to thinking: With all the videos we've seen of sleeping cats sliding off their perches, does it ever happen in the wild? I mean, does a puma ever crawl up into a tree, nod off and slide out of the tree?


You made me spit my coke out, now I have to wonder if the propane comapny will think I am a slob for having a dirty bill.

[Honey]

I misinterprited the intent of the thread. I apologize, and if the mods wish to eradicate my previous post, by all means do so.

I believe I misinterpreted your first post. I thought it was made only to garner negative comments. It appears I was mistaken and I apologize.

Now, can we have some more cute kitty stories? Being allergic to cats, I need to experience cat ownership through the SDMB members.

[matt_mcl]

And it's perfectly true that the true grace part is the aloofness after the disaster. My roommate's cat pulls a stunt like that and she immediately walks away with this perfectly serene "I meant to do that" expression on her face. (My cat, being part dog, tends to sit there looking goofily astonished at himself for awhile. "Gravity!")

[SnakesCatLady]

And it's perfectly true that the true grace part is the aloofness after the disaster. My roommate's cat pulls a stunt like that and she immediately walks away with this perfectly serene "I meant to do that" expression on her face. (My cat, being part dog, tends to sit there looking goofily astonished at himself for awhile. "Gravity!")


In our old house, the cats had access to the living room and thus to the stereo speakers. On a regular basis, Bill the Cat would fall off one of the speakers - then stroll away with the "I meant to do that" expression. We came to refer to it as "checking to see if we paid the gravity bill".

Thud! Yep, gravity's still working!

[Ludovic]

My cat's breath smells like cat food.

[Happy Clam]

(Pointedly ignoring Gorgon Heap's post)

My cat once fell in to the toilet and pulled the lid down on top of himself in the process.

He used to jump on the back of the toilet so he could watch me get ready in the bathroom mirror every morning, but on this occasion he shorted the jump. As he fell, his paws grabbed at the top of the toilet for purchase, but instead got the lip of the toilet lid.

Splash. Clank. MRRRREEEEOWRRRRR!!!!
Mwahahaa!

Oh dear. Yes, cats do funny things.

[Bookkeeper]

"The Fog Creeps in on Little Cat Feet"

Yeah, right. This teaches me that Carl Sandburg never owned a cat. Especially at 3 in the morning.

When you have several cats chasing each other up and down the halls in the middle of the night, the term "thundering herd" is more appropriate than "little cat feet".

[Anaamika]

Oh, I've got a real story, though it's hearsay.

Friend's got a cat and hardwood floors. Well, the cat harasses the dogs, and takes off down the hallway. And always

1)either forgets that the hardwood floors tell the dogs exactly where she is
2) or forgets about the rug. You know, the one where she runs on madly and it bunches up underneath her, finally to shoot out behind her and have her slide across the floor on her butt, yowling the whole time?

[chappachula]

When you have several cats chasing each other up and down the halls in the middle of the night, the term "thundering herd" is more appropriate than "little cat feet".

No, the proper term is "a thundering herd of little cat feet".
Ah, such a unique sound!--irritating and cute , all at the same time.

[Marlitharn]

When you have several cats chasing each other up and down the halls in the middle of the night, the term "thundering herd" is more appropriate than "little cat feet".
Bonus points if you sleep with the bedroom door open, and the cats use your stomach as a springboard to reverse their trajectory and go flying back up the hallway.

[Anaamika]

Bonus points if you sleep with the bedroom door open, and the cats use your stomach as a springboard to reverse their trajectory and go flying back up the hallway.
BWAHAHAHA....I can totally picture that. Plus your awakening and OOF!

[Mama Tiger]

What I want to know is how cats can selectively increase their mass. Our cat weighs 6-1/2 pounds. And yet she can leap on you with a force of at least two tons. It's quite astonishing. All I can figure is that she's able to manipulate matter at a subatomic level.

[TheBoneyKingofNowhere]

My cat (age 1) has learned that he can climb up different things by jumping up to the point where his front paws hit --- where he can lift the rest of his body up to where he wants to be (like the top of my bookshelves, kitchen cupboards, etc!

Cut to yesterday, there's the ironing board in the living room. He jumps up, front two paws hit the top of the board, but immediately it starts to tip over. I watch, as the board falls over in slow motion with kitty hanging on with his two front paws. Terrified to move, he lands on his back with the ironing board slamming into his chest.

Freaked me out for a second, but he was fine. :)

[Eve]

What I want to know is how cats can selectively increase their mass. Our cat weighs 6-1/2 pounds. And yet she can leap on you with a force of at least two tons.

Not only that, but after dark they unscrew their paws and replace them with wooden piano legs to walk on you with.

[Punoqllads]

Not only that, but after dark they unscrew their paws and replace them with wooden piano legs to walk on you with.
I knew it! I knew it! Now I just need to find where my cat George stashes them.

Incidentally, George was named after George of the Jungle for the unusual frequency that he would run into walls back when he was a kitten.

[Daithi Lacha]

Our apartment: leads to a porch, sperated by sliding glass dorrs, open slightly ot allow for cat-passage.

Goldie chasing Jelly. Jelly tears throught the living run, heading for the porch. Chooses the wrong side of the open dor, banging his face into the glass. Hard

Goldie, surprised at Jelly's sudden stoppage, slams into Jelly's butt face-first.

Force of Goldie's head/butt contact bangs Jelly's face into the glass for a second time.

Three seconds later: Jelly chasing Goldie through the apartment ...

[Daithi Lacha]

Jeepers, I can't spell "door" today!

[Guinastasia]

One of our largest cats (we have six), Piper Grace, is probably the most graceful, dainty and elegant of all of them. She's a big, waddling thing, but somehow she manages to eat very slowly and ladylike, she jumps over the babygates (to keep the dog out of the upstairs and the laundry room) with nary a sound, and manages always to be very dignified. Except for the fact that she waddles instead of walking.


Then, the second smallest cat, Noel, the one you'd THINK would be very graceful by looking at her, has all the grace of an elephant on a bender. She clomps down the steps at high speed, lands crooked when jumping, makes enough noise for twenty cats, and bullies everyone around her.

[Spatial Rift 47]

Jeepers, I can't spell "door" today!

That's okay, it wasn't a door anyway. It was ajar.

[Antinor01]

Bonus points if you sleep with the bedroom door open, and the cats use your stomach as a springboard to reverse their trajectory and go flying back up the hallway.

My cat Shadow would do something similar. I had a waterbed with a mirrored headboard (shelves and all that) that he liked to sleep on top of. He normally started out the night sleeping with me and then wandering off to do those mysterious nighttime cat things. Then he would come back and decide it was sleep on the headboard time, and use my torso as his springboard to make the 3ish foot leap.

[dwyr]

Bonus points if you sleep with the bedroom door open, and the cats use your stomach as a springboard to reverse their trajectory and go flying back up the hallway.



Not so much stomach as full bladder, first thing in the morning.

Then they have the temerity to start wailing for breakfast.

[betenoir]

In opposision to the OP....well, I have to say it because I've been so impressed recently...my cat is about 14.....what is that, like 85 in human years? Has a thyroid condition, and more to the point, starting last month, due to an infection has ONE EYE. And can still make the three foot leap (can you leap three feet straight up?) on to the sofa arm. Accuratly. Without depth perception.

Grace and coordination thy name is Catherine Bastet (my cat's name)

(That said I can't say I haven't seen my share of cats rolling off furniture, or walking off when they think the newspaper is more of the table, and doing the "I meant to do that" thing :D ) (And then there's Charlie my other cat who runs headlong into the plateglass window after the birds at the bird feeder....over and over again. But I blame that on his being male :p )

[picunurse]

When you have several cats chasing each other up and down the halls in the middle of the night, the term "thundering herd" is more appropriate than "little cat feet".
I once lived in an apartment where my girl, Killer*, had 4 kittens. My adult male, Spot# would play chase with the kittens through the three rooms.
One day I had occasion to meet my downstairs neighbor, Her first question, when she found I lived above her was, "Do you have several really big dogs?" I had to bring her up to meet the crowd before she'd believe me! She adopted one of the kittens.

* Killer was a 4 pound streak of pregnant black lightning when I rescued her.
#Spot was a giant, Appleheaded Siamese, who thought he was 12 weeks old his whole life.

Bonus points if you sleep with the bedroom door open, and the cats use your stomach as a springboard to reverse their trajectory and go flying back up the hallway.
I think it's in the manual that humans have to be part of the race after a certain hour of the night. Even if it means they become part of the track.

Not only that, but after dark they unscrew their paws and replace them with wooden piano legs to walk on you with. I thought they were 4 inch spike heels.

I knew it! I knew it! Now I just need to find where my cat George stashes them.You'll never find them. They stash their important stuff in another dimension. It's where they go to hide when it's time for a vet visit or a bath too.How else do you explain where that cat toy that's been missing for two years suddenly shows up again?


I had an absolutely beautiful shaded silver persian (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v483/picunurse/tiki9.jpg), named Lillith who would fall off the same window sill everyday. It was just a little too narrow for her, but she loved sitting in the sun. She'd hang on until she just couldn't keep her eyes open another second. Her head would bob once or twice, then CRASH! Then, she'd dantily prance from behind the sofa (yes, she could have sat on the sofa back in the sun :dubious: ) Telling the world it was her afternoon entertainment to crash-land on the floor.

[Greywolf73]

My less-than-coordinated cat Fatboy would somehow manage to climb up on top of things and then get himself stuck. He woke me up once at 2 AM, yowling loudly for help because he'd made it to the top of the very tall china cabinet and couldn't figure out how to get down again. It's a good thing he was an indoor cat and didn't have access to scary tall things like trees.

[matt_mcl]

BWAHAHAHA....I can totally picture that. Plus your awakening and OOF!

You know when comic artists just give up trying to express the noise a person makes and just represent it as !!! ? That's the noise.

[Tuckerfan]

Heh, I just got to watch feline "grace" in action a few minutes ago. Mama cat was on the couch near my feet, two of the kittens were near their food dish, and the third kitten was in the kitchen. I heard what sounded like something being caught in my PC fan. I got up to see what was causing it (to make sure a kitten hadn't crawled into the open side again), this caused mama to change her position, that didn't work so well, so she dropped to the floor right as I was stepping closeby. She startled a little, and the kittens positively freaked. Two of them jumped into their food dish, and the third one went leaping off in the kitchen heading for parts unknown. :D

[theunfounddoor]

I have three cats in my house, all black. It just kind of happened that way. Anyway, the biggest one (We call him Sid, short for Obsidian) is mine and he is very skittish. Any time that they're all lazing around in semi close proximity to each other and say the phone rings and you move a little too quickly, or someone is to knock on the door. Sid will get spooked (or whatever) and just book it. This of course thoroughly freaks out the other two and they all scatter in random directions. One invariably goes flying straight into a wall, or one will try to pivot off the woodwork on one of the door frames and slide off onto they're side. Yeah, this is a daily occurance.

[Clothahump]

If a human being consistently knocked over lamps or fell off chairs, s/he would get negative feedback, understand it, and quickly internalize a feeling of "I better not do this. I need to be a less careful person."


In this case, would less be more?

:D

[Beware of Doug]

In this case, would less be more?

:D

Meooooow. I meant to do that. ;)

[EddyTeddyFreddy]

One day I had occasion to meet my downstairs neighbor, Her first question, when she found I lived above her was, "Do you have several really big dogs?" I had to bring her up to meet the crowd before she'd believe me! She adopted one of the kittens. What is it with kittens having 20-pound concrete paws when they race around? I swear, kittens running are twice as loud as adult cats.

[Tastes of Chocolate]

We used to have a large fish tank. The top of it was about 4 ½' off the floor. One of our cats loved to sit on the lights that were on top of that tank. (Mmmmm, warm AND smells like fish). Anyway, one time we were cleaning the fish tank, and had all the lights and hoods off of it. We were in the bathroom cleaning stuff, when we hear (Sploosh) "MREOW!!" (Scrabble) (Scrabble) (Skitter) (drip, drip, drip). Afraid of what we would find, we heading back to the fish tank. Sure enough, Yarbro, the 15# cat, had tried to jump to his favorite perch, and ended up in the tank. We found the cat, who was wet except for his head, and then cleaned the water off the ceiling over the tank.

[moonstarssun]

Pixel is normally a graceful cat. He's young and strong and a remarkable jumper. But once I heard a weird sound coming from the bathroom and went to investigate. He was straddling the towel rack above the toilet and the weird sound was his front paws on the wall as he tried using them to pull himself up so he could get his back feet on the bar.

Hazel is a chubby little thing. One time a bird landed on the sill outside the window over the fireplace, and Hazel got so excited that she tried to get up on the mantel. She hung onto the edge of the mantel with her front paws while frantically swinging her body side to side so she could get her back paws up there too.

And another Pixel one: Mr. m was sitting on the floor, refilling their dry food bin and their dishes. I did something that startled Pixel just as he was walking over to get some food, so he jumped, slamming into Mr. m and knocking the food bowl out of his hand. Then he tried to run, but the kibble all over the floor was making him slip, so he ran in place about five times before finally bolting out of the room.

[conurepete]

My husband had a Modern Dance class in college. One day they were doing some exercises where the teacher would tell the class to "move like a cloud" or "grow like a tree". It was pretty predictable until she told them to move "like a cat". In a room full of dancers slinking and leaping, he took 5 heavy steps and collapsed on his side with a huge thump like projectile roadkill. He got an A for that day. His 23 pound Mo-cat was probably very proud.

[Fish]

Dirtbag was sudden death on 4 paws to any cat toys (or clear marbles) the house had to offer. He enjoyed sitting on window sills, but never slept there: the house had wide eaves covering a wrap-around deck so there were no convenient sun-warmed sills downstairs.

His windowsill duty compelled him to watch the suspicious activities of anything warm, fuzzy, and fast-moving that happened to be around outside. When the Venetian blinds were raised, he would sit there for hours, tail a-twitch.

Of course, when the blinds were raised, the cord was pulled all the way down: and it was a cord of two strands, knotted together at the end and woven through some kind of adjustable buckle so you could change the length of the spare cord.

In pursuit of something from window to window, Dirtbag once turned and took a mighty leap through the Venetian blind cord and instantly did an impression of the dog from the Foghorn Leghorn cartoons, catching his neck in the two strands and making his whole body swing away from the window.

He kicked frantically to get himself un-clotheslined, and fell ignominiously on his back. Clunk.

He meant to do that.