View Full Version : Son of the milkman? Parents your opposites?
Swallowed My Cellphone
04-10-2007, 01:25 PM
So my mom is the big-hearted, Marge Simpson, sensible type. My father was your textbook 98 lb weakling: the book-toting uber-nerd. My entire life, until the day my dad died, I never saw him thow any ball of any kind. Not once. I've never seen either of my parents ride a bike. Neither of my parents ever learned to swim. They never took us camping and drive everywhere.
They fell in love, married, and spawned.... a pair of athletes.
Sure, sure, my sister and I were both pretty much "A" students (like our parents), but we are both die-hard outdoor adventurers and sports are an intrinsic part of our day-to-day lives. We are a pair of crazy exercise monkeys! My sister was a competitive rower for years and is now the whitewater kayaking queen. I'm a distance runner and go on long camping expeditions for rock climbing and spelunking. We both play racquet sports regularly and are on rec teams, and we both ride our bicycles everywhere in lieu of a car.
Our lifestyles are totally the opposite of our parents'. Growing up, we had no family role-models for the lifestyles we grew into. We wonder where we got our "zest for activity" gene.
Anyone else here wondering if you're adopted?
04-10-2007, 02:49 PM
Dad started his college career working with mathematical models of various ecosystems, then moved into computer engineering. Now he's a "project manager" - as far as I can tell that means he's the Pointy Haired Boss from Dilbert. He always did programs in my elementary school for "Engineers week", and loved working with little kids.
Mom studied biology then taught high school for a while. Then she found work as a marine botanist. When my sister came along, mom quit her full-time job and started doing day-care part-time. Now she's a substitute teacher, primarily for elementary school kids.
I have absolutely no aptitude for anything remotely technical. I've always just barely squeaked by in science and math. I actually failed chemistry in high school. The ocean absolutely terrifies me and I think seaweed is deeply disturbing. I'm all for nature in theory, but I'm far more comfortable in a 'concrete jungle' than the Everglades. I don't in any way like children (they're noisy, disease-ridden, and terrible conversationalists). I have no desire to ever enter the corporate world (as my father enjoys).
If it weren't for the fact that I inherited all their bad genes, I'd be certain I was swapped at birth.
04-10-2007, 02:55 PM
Hmm. What happens if you did wonder that for a good portion of your life and then it turned out you were adopted? :eek: (But from within the family, so they could hide it from you.)
I don't look much like my [adoptive] parents at all and share no common traits with my mother! But I showed traits of my grandparents and other family members so....never thought about it much. :)
04-10-2007, 03:26 PM
My mom is very careful about her appearance, wears makeup even if she's not going out, has joined all kinds of clubs, hated physics and loved biology when she took it in high school, doesn't think complaining is a good thing to do, and is an immaculate housekeeper.
My mom and dad both were popular in high school, enjoyed dating, AFAIK don't read much non-fiction that isn't directly connected with their everyday lives, are religious Christians (I suspect of the variety that don't spend a lot of time thinking about religious matters), are scared of computers, vote Republican, and are good at doing arithmetic in their heads.
Appearance-wise, I'm doing well if I don't have any visible food stains and am wearing matching shoes. One of the things I like about my work is that nobody cares how I dress. I routinely wear 10+ year-old T-shirts to work. My hair could have stood to be cut and maybe colored a few months ago. I think George Bush Sr. (or maybe it was Ronald Reagan) was in the White House the last time I did anything with my nails other than cut them when they break, and the last time I wore makeup was at my wedding in 2003. I do have a history of depression, but my appearance doesn't change much based on how depressed I am- I just think that things like clothes, hair, and makeup are boring.
Housekeeping- we get someone to come in every couple of weeks and clean so things don't get too bad.
I was a total outcast in school pretty much until I went to college, and I'm not a "joiner".
I reserve the right to complain about anything I want to. Hey, how are you going to get any sympathy if you don't kvetch a little?
I spent (and still spend) a lot of time thinking about religion, and eventually left Christianity to convert to Judaism.
I hated biology in high school. I majored in (among other things) physics in college, read popular physics books for fun. I do UNIX tech support for a living, and spend much of my free time playing computer games.
I can't do arithmetic in my head worth anything. I liked math classes a lot more once they got past the drill-and-calculate stuff, which I never could get to the point where I could do it well and fast. I think my mom thought I was kind of slow as a kid because I wasn't good at arithmetic.
My sister and I are both liberal Democrats.
We've always wondered if I might have been switched at birth (though I do look like my parents and other people in our family). But I'm pretty sure I wasn't, because of a picture I have that was taken before my wedding. It was taken in the "bride's room" while I was getting ready, and is of me and my dad. In it, we're both trying to smile for the camera, and failing miserably, with pretty much the same expression on our faces.
NinjaChick- why not show that seaweed who's boss by going out for some nice sushi with nori? I could do it for you, if you don't want to...
04-10-2007, 04:05 PM
I'm not so much adopted as....a bastard.
Why bastard? wherefore base?
When my dimensions are as well compact,
My mind as generous, and my shape as true,
As honest madam's issue? Why brand they us
With base? with baseness? bastardy? base, base?
Who, in the lusty stealth of nature, take
More composition and fierce quality
Than doth, within a dull, stale, tired bed,
Go to the creating a whole tribe of fops.
But on my mother's side I'm certainly her daughter. Same politics, same religion, same voice. I have a nicer nose though :D .
I do read more Shakespear than she does.
Don't Call Me Shirley
04-10-2007, 04:12 PM
My parents are extremely religious. We attended church three times a week. Twice on Sunday and Wednesday night. Every week. No misses. No going to the kids program, I sat in the grown-up service. I was drilled on commandments and beatitudes and fruits of the spirit in the car on long trips. I was made to memorize huge swaths of scripture. I went to a fundamentalist private school.
My sister grew up to be a missionary in Africa.
I grew up to hate religion.
04-10-2007, 04:13 PM
My wife and I were rather standoff-ish as children, kept to ourselves, that sort of thing.
Sophia is a social butterfly with more friends at five than her mother and I ever had during any period of our lives. In an average 4-month period she gets invited to more birthday parties than I ever have.
There's no mistaking us. We look similar and share the same messed-up psyches.
04-10-2007, 04:22 PM
My mother is a homemaker, women's clubber (at least before she retired), who always has a million sewing and other craft project's going. She's quite a decent cook, but avoids anything spicy or exotic and has recently gone over to the dark side in a big way concerning things like pre-made biscuits and processed food in general.
My father is a retired minister who played piano in a jazz band in his youth and stills plays out his cop fantasies by riding with the local police as a chaplain. (He has done a lot of good as a chaplain over his career, but he does seem to relish the "cowboy" aspects of policing a bit more than is strictly necessary.)
I'm a working mom who would rather read a good book than do anything crafty. I sometimes have a project going but it takes me forever to finish it. I love cooking from scratch and am always looking for exotic, spicy recipes.
As a kid I hated any kind of public speaking, suffered through musical performances and never got over my stage fright. I also hate violence, danger or any kind of physical risk-taking.
However, I actually am adopted.
04-10-2007, 04:24 PM
My parents are both very, very small.
My mom is 5'1", teeny until she became a grandma, and now she's round in a grandma-ish way (ie, still small, but soft). My dad is 5'4", weighs about 115.
I'm 5'8" and...buxom.
I LOOK like I'm adopted when I hang out with them. :)
Swallowed My Cellphone
04-10-2007, 04:26 PM
I grew up to hate religion.Ah, but is that a reactive thing?
Our parents were supportive of our endeavors, they just couldn't relate to us about any of it. I know a lot of people who grew up in religious households and they grew up hating thie family's religion because it was too restrictive, or rigorous, or overbearing. But in our case we related to our parents' lifestyle easily enough, so there was no negative vibe provoking us to be different.
Tthey were supportive of our activities, they just were not at all predisposed to do any of it themselves. We wanted to work ourselves to the point of exhaustion, even in really hard in hot weather. Our parents looked at us as if we hatched from pods.
Swallowed My Cellphone
04-10-2007, 04:28 PM
However, I actually am adopted.< Dr. Ruth Medding Psychotherapist Voice > Zo! Interesting! Is it "nature" or is it "nurture"....? < /voice >
My mother is 5 feet tall and tends to hippy-ness; very pear-shaped, as are both my 5 feet 4 inch sisters. There's not a B cup amongst the three of them. They have all at some point worn their hair past their shoulder blades. All had to bust their guts in school to get decent grades.
I'm nearly 5'9", no hips, no booty to speak of, Cs going on Ds, my hair won't grow past my clavicles, I was reading when I was 3 and breezed through school without hardly cracking a book.
Mama and Daddy were great, but I was always waiting for my real family to show up someday.
When I first introduced my fiance to The Family, he wondered what the mailman looked like.
04-10-2007, 09:28 PM
I'm not so much adopted as....a bastard.
I'm not a bastard, I was just born 122 months premature.
04-10-2007, 09:43 PM
If I didn't look like every woman in my mom's family from at least the time photos were invented...
I'm still convinced there's something one of my aunts isn't telling. She and I are a lot alike personality- and taste-wise. I think it sticks out more with me because my parents are ridiculously white-bread bland, and at least aunt's family has some quirks, even if there not the same ones she and I share.
Freudian Push Up Bra
04-10-2007, 11:12 PM
As much as I tried to convince myself and others that I couldn't possibly be related to those 'freaks', there is no denying it. Since moving to live with my dad, the most common phrase was 'holy cow, you look exactly like your mother.' The second one was 'you sound like her too.' My dad and I have all the same mannerisms and personality-wise, I'm a carbon copy in female form. We even raise the same eyebrow in the same manner, usually at the same time. Freaks people right the hell out.
Dad and I (http://i103.photobucket.com/albums/m127/sunseeker_101/Val%20Dinner/stefanddad2.jpg)
A better shot; see the smile? (http://i103.photobucket.com/albums/m127/sunseeker_101/Val%20Dinner/dadandstef.jpg)
Mum and I (http://i103.photobucket.com/albums/m127/sunseeker_101/Val%20Dinner/mumandstef2.jpg)
04-11-2007, 06:56 AM
F.P.U.B. you look just like your parents! Your mom is beautiful!
I look adopted, at least mom wise. Mom has black hair, olive skin,brown eyes, looks asian. I have blond/ red hair,green eyes, mayonaise skin. Dad has black hair olive skin green eyes. However, I do have his eyes and his rare blood type or I really would wonder.
Swallowed My Cellphone
04-11-2007, 07:09 AM
Both my sister and I look like both our parents. Like we got equal distribution of features from each. Mom's nose, dad's jaw, stuff like that. I especially notice it in photos. Since we're so close in age, only 18 months apart (yes, my poor mother!) when we were little poeple thought we were twins (my sister has always beena tomboy). We also both pretty much have our mom's disposition and very much her sense of humour and basic personality type.
Except for the additction to activity. We've always been about fun, and "fun" for us has usually meant running around playing games. Our parents seem to find physcial activity to be a chore and talked of sore muscles as if they were a bad thing.
Strangely, my sister and I also have "arty" hobbies. For awhile I was actually able to make a (piddly) income as an illustrator, and my sister is a decent musician. We don't know of any relative on either my dad's side or mom's who are creatively inclined. Plenty of family members to are connoisseurs, but no one who actually likes to paint or play the piano or anything at all.
04-11-2007, 08:56 AM
My mom is short, has olive skin (with freckles!), dark brown eyes and straight, jet black hair. She's got nice lady-sized feet and hands.
I'm tall, have pale skin, bright blue eyes and curly, brown/blonde hair. I have huge feet and hands.
My brother looks exactly like my mom, features-wise (hair, skin, eyes, a bit short, normal sized feet) and I look exactly like my dad (hair, skin, eyes, tall, big feet).
Except, I was lucky enough to get the "fat genes" from my mom's side of the family. My dad is as skinny as a rail.
Oddly enough, my mom's lifelong best friend is tall and fair, and often has the same ailments as me (the sort of stupid ailments you get because of your body chemistry, like "women's issues" and skin problems). I find this amusing.
I'm not a bastard, I was just born 122 months premature.
04-11-2007, 01:42 PM
While I'm certain that I'm my father's son, the jury is out as to whether it was my mother's egg that provided that 1/2 of the genetics.
I look like Dad, and have many of the same mannerisms, hobbies, and interests.
My mother on the other hand, is about as opposite politically, hobby, physically & otherwise as is possible... except for the curly-toe deformity that comes via her line (everyone in it has a crooked "ring toe" on both feet. All of her siblings, their kids, and the kid's kids so far.)
04-12-2007, 07:19 PM
Rather of topic but I think my cats are adopted. My cat (RIP) had kittens. When We just got her and hadn't had the chance to get her fixed before she slipped out and as far as I know met the Tom who had been been wailing at the window.
Thing is, she was small and furry and totaly black. He (the suitor) was huge and an orange tabby.
The brother and sister we kept are A. Furry beyond all sanity brown tabby and B. Sleek and black but mottled.
They look nothing like their parents. They look absolutly nothing like each other. I'm just wondering when their mother got out to go to the kitty adoption againstce.
04-13-2007, 10:45 AM
I do not look like either of my parents.
However, I do look creepily like my younger brother. It's really sort of disturbing.
So, if I was adopted, my parents were consistent as to source.
04-13-2007, 11:55 AM
I'm the opposite: I'm so much a combination of my two parents (my dad's colouring and height and a mix of both their features) that I get "you look so much like your mom" and "you really resemble your dad" on a regular 50/50 basis.
04-13-2007, 01:31 PM
Mom dad and brother all have brown hair. Mom and bro tan easily. Me? Red hair, skin turns pink as a dog's dick after a half hour in the sun.
04-13-2007, 01:45 PM
I'm pretty much what you'd expect from the offspring of my parents physically, and temperamentally as well, albeit with somewhat different interests and experiences.
Ditto for my wife. You look at her with her parents and there's not question about parentage.
I have very fair skin, tending to freckles, that burns immediately but never tans, with extremely straight brown hair that was mostly red when I was younger (up until my late teens). Dark brown eyes. My wife's fairly stereotypically Jewish looking -- dark very curly hair, dark eyes (with a hint of green), olive complexion that tans easily, etc.
We have three kids. My son has thick slightly wavy blondish-brown hair and steely grey/blue eyes, and my wife's skin tone. My first daughter has gorgeous red hair (very straight), dark brown eyes, and very fair skin with a dusting of freckles. My younger daughter has quite curly blond hair and blue eyes, with fair skin. When we're all out together, people are constantly trying to figure out who goes with who. If it weren't for the fact that facially all three of them are obviously related to me I might be concerned myself :)
04-13-2007, 08:10 PM
I once had a dream my aunt died. The next day she had a massive heart attack. A few months later I had a dream my grandmother died. She was found dead the next morning, the doctor said her heart gave out. A few months later I had a dream that my father died. My mother called the next morning and told me she found the milkman dead on the front porch, he died of a heart failure.
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