Did Mickey Ever Have the Clap? or, Gullible's Travels

[Eve]

I have a friend who is a veritable font of Urban Legends, and he believes every one of 'em. He's been telling me for years he saw a sex film in school which had Disney characters telling about safe sex (this would have been in the 1970s, though the film might have been made earlier).

He claims to remember Mickey getting the clap from Minnie [insert joke here about Minnie being "fuckin' Goofy"], Jiminy Cricket singing a song about VD, and Daisy Duck not sitting on the toilet seat.

I say he's full of it—but just today he tells me he met someone else who claims to have seen the same film! Is he indeed remembering correctly? Has anyone else seen this? Ike, is it in that "Mental Hygiene" book we were discussing?

[G.B.H. Hornswoggler]

No solid info here, though Euty will probably be along soon to set the record straight. (He maintains perhaps the definitive Disney short films site at The Encyclopedia of Disney Animated Shorts (http://www.geocities.com/~eutychus55/index.htm).)I did check that site for a bit myself, with no luck.

But I have a suspicion that the UL realy is a mangled memory of some "Private Snafu" shorts (created by Warners during the war for servicemen, featuring a character with a slight physical resemblance to Elmer Fudd). There's a complete Snafu-ography right here (http://tultw.com/bios/snafu.htm), but none of those seem to fit even slightly your friend's description.

So really I'm just trying to jump in before Euty and pad my post-count.

[Arnold Winkelried]

Eutychus55, where are you? We need your expertise.

The part of Mickey Mouse getting a venereal disease sounds like it's lifted from a joke I read once about "what happened to those Disney characters?" in which Mickey is said to have died of a VD after visiting prostitutes because Minnie said no for 50 years.

[Eve]

My friend is very specific about songs and visuals and all . . . I don't wanna come out and call him a baldfaced liar, but I really doubt this film exists.

I think this may fall into the "that'd be the butt, Bob" syndrome.

[cher3]

This site lists a Disney-made cartoon film called "VD attack plan," but Mickey does not make an appearance, it would seem.

http://www.chronicle.duke.edu/chronicle/1999/03/12/r07Skipspicks.html

[plnnr]

I don't recall the film you're mentioning, Eve, but I do recall one in which Snow White made a particularly colorful use of Pinnochio's nose. "Go ahead, boy, tell another lie. Yes! Yes! Lie to me, Daddy!" is about the only line of dialogue I remember.

[jb_farley]

dunno about the movie, but have you guys seen the one with mickey passed out next to a bottle of opium? tee hee hee..

[Gadarene]

Somewhat of a hijack:

I've got a very vivid memory of reading an Archie comics digest in the mid to late eighties (about 1986) that contained a story in which Archie and Betty decide to have sex, but are interrupted by Jughead before they can do so. It's presented as somewhat of a cautionary tale of sleeping with someone before you're both ready; Archie and Betty are relieved at the end of the story that they didn't go through with it.

Anyway, I'm inclined to regard this as the product of an overheated preadolescent imagination...but I remember reading the story quite clearly. Any Archie aficionados out there who can set me straight?

[Eutychus]

Okay, I'm here ...

I haven't found and record of a film starring the Disney animated "stars" about VD. The one you're probably thinking of was the one mentioned above "VD Attack Plan." I have a copy somewhere around here; it's an animated short featuring a platoon of VD germs being prepared for an attack by their sargent. Disney did quite a few educational shorts starting back in the mid-40's when the studio was pretty much taken over by the armed forces and began making military instructional films. The first, IIRC, was called "Four Methods of Flush Riveting." They also did one later on entitled "The Story of Menstruation" which I've yet to find a copy of.

[Alphagene]

Well Disney did produce an animated short called The Story of Menstruation (http://www.snopes.com/disney/films/menses.htm)

It's the prequel to the classic The Story of Premenstruation starring Cruella De Ville.

[TampaFlyer]

There are dirty Archie comics out there, but they weren't done by the people that own the rights to those characters.

[Gadarene]

Originally posted by TampaFlyer
There are dirty Archie comics out there, but they weren't done by the people that own the rights to those characters.

Well, I remember this being legit; I read it at the magazine rack of a supermarket (if I actually read it at all, that is, and am not just remembering a dream I had, or something).

[Ukulele Ike]

Originally posted by Gadarene
Archie and Betty decide to have sex, but are interrupted by Jughead before they can do so.

Well!

I hope Jughead lopped off his freckly dick with a pair of garden shears!

Deflowering BETTY? Good god, is nothing sacred?

If that carrot-topped miscreant wants to get his wick dipped, he can save up his paper-route money and buy Veronica a diamond bracelet. SHE'D come through with the goodies, the whore.

Betty! The idea!

[Eve]

So, no definitive word on this, huh? You mean my friend might actually be RIGHT?

[Eutychus]

Noooooo ... I would be more apt to say that if I can't find any source on this in all the references that I have, it probably doesn't exist.

[BoBettie]

Zette just found herself a new sig:

I hope Jughead lopped off his freckly dick with a pair of garden shears!

[hawthorne]

I do have a memory of something that may be the source of this Eve. The British cartoonist Gerald Scarfe - whose style not is not unlike that of Ralph Steadman and who is mainly known for his editorial cartoons, the opening credits to the TV series Yes Minister and the animated sections of Pink Floyd's The Wall - once made a short film which was called IIRC The Long Drawn out Trip which featured Mickey Mouse succumbing to a spiral of drugs and depravity.

I have not seen this film, but I used to have a book which featured cells from it. It looked pretty warped and I would be very surprised if you could still get it. It may be what you're after though.

picmr

[Eve]

OK, latest developments. I wasn't going to say a thing to my friend, but he asked, "So, did the people on that message board find out anything about that Disney film?" I told him what y'all said, but he swears up down and sideways that he saw it in class in the fall of 1973, he THINKS it was called "VD and You," and that it did indeed have Disney characters (Mickey & Minnie, Jiminy Cricket, Daisy Duck).

So the only thing I can figure is, he saw an illegal underground film that was put out by some tiny wise-ass company, and then when Disney got wind of it, it was snapped up and destroyed.

[Johanna]

Of course, to make the Disney characters go porno is irresistibly attractive for a satirist.

I read back in 1971 that Disney raised a huge stink over two posters from one of those countercultural headshop poster distributors(anybody remember "Yes Art Posters"?).

One of them showed Disney characters engaged in various un-Disney activities, I think there was a gang bang involving Mickey, and Goofy shooting up, and a nude Tinker Belle. The other showed a bunch of them sitting around a table getting stoned on a water pipe.

See in Harlan Ellison's 1982 collection Stalking the Nightmare, the story titled "Scenes from the Real World: Labor Relations." It tells the story of his employment in the 1960s as a writer at Disney that lasted exactly half a day. At lunch in the cafeteria, he was cracking up the other writers at his table by imaginatively describing the Disney characters filming a porno flick. Unbeknownst to him, there were Disney executives at the same table. By the time he returned from lunch to his office, everything had already been removed from there.

Ellison's moral: "Nobody fucks with The Mouse."

[plnnr]

A few years ago I was in Orlando for a conference. Never having been, I took the day and went to the Magic Kingdom. After a few hours I found myself just sort of standing to one side and watching this neverending sea of humanity walk past me and the thought struck me: "All of this is because a man thought the American public would be entertained by a cartoon of a mouse. And he was right." It staggered me. Had "Steamboat Willie" been a flop we probably would have never heard of Walt Disney.

[DavisMcDavis]

Originally posted by Eve

I think this may fall into the "that'd be the butt, Bob" syndrome.
Don't know if you've checked out http://www.snopes.com lately, but now she has a clip of the Newlywed game which, though different from the UL, has a woman who giggles and says what seems to be "Is it in the ass?" to her husband, which is bleeped out.