The Pit Is Dead - Long Live The Pit!

[Nickrz]

No shit. If you fools could stand back and look at the crap you're spewing here in our former Holy of Holies..

You sound like a bunch of retarded rejects from a mutual admiration society. The last time I heard puling and whining and "I hate that guy, so you hate him, too" like this, I was in 7th grade detention. Really, just listen to yourselves. Dumping on the youngsters here, all the while ranting and raving about shit that don't mean nothin' to no one, just to hear yourselves talk and to see who you can get to stroke your pathetic mindless egos with some cyber ass-kissing.

Your crapola wouldn't even play in MPSIMS.

I'm serious. If I added up all the worthless posts put up in here in the last month, I couldn't even get a chuckle out of it, much less a humor column. I used to love to come in here and see what.. maybe 10 threads with some really good flaming and hatred and just plain anal debauchery going, but now?

Cripes. Buncha sissy-assed backbiters and troll-baiters, is all. Following each other around with your noses up everyone else's ass sniffing for shit. Children mouthing off for the crowd, writing your names on the bathroom wall, pounding your chests and crying "HEY, LOOKIT ME! AIN'T I GREAT?"
when you don't have a Goddamned thing to say.

I've heard more intelligent and offensive conversation at a Sunday-school picnic. Get thee erudite, thou fools and find something worthwhile to do with your lonely desperate hours. Get thee angry and waste not our time with your sullen drivel.

The Pit is not for losers like you.
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Ps. If I get fired for this, at least throw me a good going away party.

[Mazey]

While I realize few of us have been insulted as frequently as Nickrz, who moderates with his J.C. Penney stretched-out briefs atop his pointy head, and then has the temerity to complain about stretched-out leg-holes... surely someone can take this man to task and point out the numerous errors of his ways. I would, but Nickrz honestly just bores me to tears.

[Contestant #3]

I fucking couldn't agree more Nicrz! I can't fucking stand the appologizing and sucking up that I read out here! This was suppossed to be a place to slam and be slammed but now it's a fucking feel-good love-in. If you can't be an obnoxious prick, then stay the fuck out! If you want a group hug, then go to MPSIMS!

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Contestant #3

[Contestant #3]

BTW Nickrz,

It's nice to see a post from you with more than two sentences. I also noticed that you used a few 3 syllable words.

Did your wife help you with that post?


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Contestant #3

[WallyM7]

You have the temerity to take us to task? US? Harken on to me, you degenerate, malformed spawn of a scorpion:

We will throw you a going away party when you die, not before. And mark my words, it will be brief, for we will have forgotten your name five minutes after you are lowered into your unmarked grave. Only your legendary ineptitude will survive you, and only until we find the time to purge this board of your meaningless drivel.

Your transparent and pathetic attempt to inspire a meaningful flame in this thread will come to nothing, I assure you.



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According to the Pope, a woman can be a saint, but not a priest.

[Nickrz]

And you just proved my (and your own last) point, Wally my man.

[WallyM7]

Are you serious? You didn't get the last line?

Hmm...

[TVeblen]

Uh, Nickrz in a twist?

Bad pun...
Ancient joke...
Lousy timing...
Already been done...

So I couldn't resist.

Shit, OUTTA here!

--->Veb, fleeing

[Diane]

AMEN!

One thing that I really miss about the old board was the ability to FLAME! REALLY FLAME! Hell, we couldn't even use masked cuss words let alone the real thing and that place still shot flames through the ceiling.

With the exception of very few posts by a few old regs, I haven't seen anything posted here that is even remotely impressive enough to call itself a flame.

They all seem to be one of the following:

- The obnoxious, annoying, bullshit that usually ends in "you skanky slut" or "suck my cock you putrid, moldy, dillweed". An obvious clue that the person has lost the debate and is grasping at straws.

- The trolling, word twisting, getting off the topic crap. As I have said many times before, this is like pissing in the wind. You want to flame someone where it counts? Using an example I used before - don't scream about cake flour when the conversation is about apple pie. Don't invent the other persons argument either, you'll just look like an idiot who can't keep up with the conversation.

- The tongue in cheek, kissy kissy, spanking BS. Maybe we should build a BDSM wing in the new Cybersex Forum.

- The "it's fun to pretend to be pissed off and write clever insults" posts. It got stale about 10 threads ago.

- The "I'm so freakin bored so someone please fight with me". They usually start out with "You people all suck, so come flame me". Where is the passion? You can't flame with style if there is no passion!

- Let's all gang bang the teenage trolls and see who can come up with the most clever slam, then we'll all pat each other on the back for things we only wish we would have thought of ourselves. :::yawn:::

I gotta go with Nickrz, the BBQ Pit is a bore.

Maybe we can get Big Iron and George to come in here and show you all how it is really done. Hell, let's even throw water on Phil, spin him around really fast and throw him into the mix. And Lynn. . . . well shit. . . that goes without saying. Then you guys will see what it's all about.

Until then, hush up, I'm trying to sleep.

------------------
>^,,^<
KITTEN
Coffee, chocolate, men . . . Some things are just better rich.

[Diane]

AMEN!

One thing that I really miss about the old board was the ability to FLAME! REALLY FLAME! Hell, we couldn't even use masked cuss words let alone the real thing and that place still shot flames through the ceiling.

With the exception of very few posts by a few old regs, I haven't seen anything posted here that is even remotely impressive enough to call itself a flame.

They all seem to be one of the following:

- The obnoxious, annoying, bullshit that usually ends in "you skanky slut" or "suck my cock you putrid, moldy, dillweed". An obvious clue that the person has lost the debate and is grasping at straws.

- The trolling, word twisting, getting off the topic crap. As I have said many times before, this is like pissing in the wind. You want to flame someone where it counts? Using an example I used before - don't scream about cake flour when the conversation is about apple pie. Don't invent the other persons argument either, you'll just look like an idiot who can't keep up with the conversation.

- The tongue in cheek, kissy kissy, spanking BS. Maybe we should build a BDSM wing in the new Cybersex Forum.

- The "it's fun to pretend to be pissed off and write clever insults" posts. It got stale about 10 threads ago.

- The "I'm so freakin bored so someone please fight with me". They usually start out with "You people all suck, so come flame me". Where is the passion? You can't flame with style if there is no passion!

- Let's all gang bang the teenage trolls and see who can come up with the most clever slam, then we'll all pat each other on the back for things we only wish we would have thought of ourselves. :::yawn:::

I gotta go with Nickrz, the BBQ Pit is a bore.

Maybe we can get Big Iron and George to come in here and show you all how it is really done. Hell, let's even throw water on Phil, spin him around really fast and throw him into the mix. And Lynn. . . . well shit. . . that goes without saying. Then you guys will see what it's all about.

Until then, hush up, I'm trying to sleep.

------------------
>^,,^<
KITTEN
Coffee, chocolate, men . . . Some things are just better rich.

[ChrisCTP]

I've done this once before, but what the hell?

Quoting myself:
:::On my knees, repeatedly bowing to the god Nickrz::: "ohmballaballa, ohmballaballa"

This is kinda what I was trying to say in the "Open the Damn Thread" thread...

Nobody got it.

Guess I should have let loose the full extent of my bitchiness.



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Veni, Vidi, Visa ... I came, I saw, I bought.

[Alphagene]

What's with the Microwaved Baby thread? Way to suck the all the air out of the Pit. And as everyone knows, flames can't survive without air. Maybe there should be a "Misery Well" forum for bilge like this.

That's not BBQ Pit material, is it? Look, flame the mother, flame the lawyer who blames it on epilepsy, flame the microwave company for not having a pre-programmed "neonate" setting. Christ, I'll make a personal request that the stupid dancing baby from that chicky estrogen-soaked "dramedy" Ally McBeal be nuked post-haste. And feed it to Calista!

But if you're just going to hold a diffuse grudge against society and hug your offspring, truck it over MPSIMS. Just label the topic properly so I know to ignore it.

And have a nice day. You whores.

[Pooch]

Amen to the OP. Looks like some kind of juvenile role playing. Delete them. Delete them all.

[WallyM7]

I'm not a whore.

I give it away for nothing.

[Czarcasm]

You would have to! People beg me for it.

[WallyM7]

Sure, because you're relly cute.


Wait a minute. Which one are you, the girl or the guy?

[E1skeptic]

Holy COW! I never thought I would agree with Nick, Con#3, and Diane at the same time... but hell, they're RIGHT!

It was fun to see all the flaming a few months ago, but now...

A bunch of kids trying to get someone's attention. Stalkers. Just waiting for their friends to show up and "support" them. C**k suckers!

They can't add anything interesting to the Dope, but because they're (according to themselves) soooooooo good at flaming and destroying trolls, they think they're GREAT!

*kisses, kisses, hun! You really showed them!*

*Good to see you mon, you're my mon, show them, they'll learn to respect you!*

*Don't mess with me, kiddo, I'm too old for you, and I bite!*

Sheesh! What a load of crap! I wish I could do some good flaming in English, but I'm not that skillful, but if you get your hands on a good translator...

¡Carajo! ¡Bola de mamones, pendejos! A ver si ya dejan de inundar este foro con tanta mierda y tan pocos cojones. Se la pasan mandándose besitos y lamiéndose las suelas. Creen que sólo ellos tienen derecho de quejarse y decirnos cómo comportarnos. Eso sí, muchos huevos para ponerse con chamaquitos que apenas están empezando a salir del cascarón, y demostrando a todo el mundo que son unos fregones para hacer jueguitos de palabras que no son más que patéticos intentos por llamar la atención. Y con sus pinches "firmas" muy astutas, JA!

Aprovechan el anonimato de Internet para ofender al que pueden (y además, agarraditos de la mano, ¡culeros!), me gustaría verlos en persona y solitos, a ver que tan pelotudos son.

No tienen nada que ofrecer al mundo más que sus payasadas, y tal vez las nalgas...

There. Delete my post if you want.

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Men will cease to commit atrocities only when they cease to believe absurdities.
-Voltaire

[OldBroad]

Alas, 'tis true. It's sad to see what the Boomers have done to their children. You've all become one homogeneous politically correct blob. You don't have the resources to do anything but call each other names - politically correct names at that.

It is terminally weird that you'd probably be thrown off the board for using such terms such as dago, kike, frog, polock, mick, spic, slope or wop, but it is perfectly acceptable to call someone a cocksucking motherfucker asshole sucking pedophile.

Name calling - old fashioned or new and PC is a cop out - and that's the Straight Dope.

There's no style - no wit.

C'mon folks, I've read your other posts. You are a pretty bright group in general. Yet you choose to take the easy way out here in the pit.

There ARE a few expert flamers here, study them --- learn from them.

Being the kind and gentle gray haired little old lady that I am, I'm not inclined to indulge in much flaming myself, but I do enjoy watching a good game of "lets you and him fight".

Here's your homework assignment due when I return to the board on the 11th: READ: Dorothy Parker, Oscar Wilde, Fred Allen; G.K. Chesterton, Jack Douglas, Steve Allen, or search on "wit" and "insult" on the net; any account of the Algonquin Round Table.

Practice thowing darts rather than dirt.

I know you can do it!


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---
Some people know a lot more when you tell them something than when you ask them something.

[Squid Vicious]

Thank you, Nick!

I was about fed up with all the worthless crap being posted in the pit. Not only has the general questions forum degenerated into a bad stand up routine ("...what's that all about?" and so on), but now it's infected the pit too. I usually only post when I think I know something about the topic, or if I think I can add something to the discussion. Pointless name calling and non existant threats (I mean comeon people, do you really think you're going to "destroy" someone with your rapier like whit?), just bore me to tears. Attack their ideas or beliefs or knowledge. Don't post just to react to some errant synaptic spark, or just to relieve yourself like some sort of literary defacation. I get too much of that kind of pointless pontification at work. Sparring with trolls is also pointless. Personally if I came across the lot of you thirsty in a desert, I wouldn't squat to let you lick the sweat off my balls. But that's just my opinion.

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"If you stick your finger in a pie, whatever is in the pie will be on your finger, and whatever is on your finger will be in the pie...unless you wear a rubber glove"----some demented old lady

[Globe-trotter]

That's ok, Squid. The rest of us are smart enough to stay out of the desert in the first place.

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Few people can be happy unless they hate some other person, nation or creed.
- Bertrand Russell (1872-1970)

[jazzmine]

Besides, Squid, the smell of your balls would pretty much make us not thirsty.

[andros]

So now everyone's going to get all lovey-dovey and spend hours writing goddamn "me-too" posts. Fuck. Oooh, we love you, Nick, we wanna be like you Nick, you're so right, Nick.

If he's so goddamn right, why are we kissing his ass?

-andros-

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"Listen Children Eternal Father Eternally One!" Exceptions? None!
-Doc Bronner

[WallyM7]

Well said, Andros.

[kellibelli]

Be careful wally, if you agree, then you are guilty of what the flame describes...they all agree we have been too nice, wait, if they all agree and they are all being nice....

**scratches head and wanders away mumbling to herself*

[WallyM7]

Catch-22.

[kellibelli]

OOh, I love catch!...Catch 22...?
Is that like 52 pick-up?
mumblemumble...................

**recaps the liquid paper bottle**

g'night all!

[E1skeptic]

See what we mean? Geez!

"Good for you, man!"

"Easy, honey..."

"Ciao, baby."
*picking his nose up, and taking a humongous bugger*

Yuck!

[Sealemon88]

Well, gee. If you want a really good flame war, maybe you should post something meaningful. If 1000 new threads were dropped here tomorrow, it wouldn't prevent any of you "old regs" from posting your own topics.

So why ya bitching? don't know how to scroll, or use the "back" button?

Or is it that it's easyer to piss and moan, rather than actually contribute anything?

Is the Pit really dead? Or have the old ones become a bunch of mewling, whiny, bitches?

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You say "cheesy" like that's a BAD thing.

[Czarcasm]

You're right, Zette. Talk about bad aim!

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They call me MISTER Wizard!

[BenDover]

In the South, the correct spelling of the proceeds of nose-picking is 'boogar', as in "Look, Ma, he's eating his boogars!"

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I have as much authority as the Pope; I just don't have as many people who believe it! - George Carlin

[E1skeptic]

Zette: OUCH!

Should I change "bugger" for MOCO?

Oh, but maybe you don't speak Spanish, right?

Watch out for buggers!

[BoBettie]

No hablo Espanol-
sorry for the cheap shot (re:bugger). I just couldn't resist. Round these parts (NY), we call 'em boogers.
:)


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Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps.
http://www.angelfire.com/ny3/zettecity/index.html

[E1skeptic]

Zette: No hay problema. I would post a smiley if this wasn't the pit.

To the stalkers: ¡Carajo! Get a new bike, will ya'? Or get a life!

[No Me Ayudes Compadre]

E1:
but if you get your hands on a good translator...

¡Carajo! ¡Bola de mamones, pendejos! A ver si ya dejan de inundar este foro con tanta mierda y tan pocos cojones. Se la pasan mandándose besitos y lamiéndose las suelas. Creen que sólo ellos tienen derecho de quejarse y decirnos cómo comportarnos. Eso sí, muchos huevos para ponerse con chamaquitos que apenas están empezando a salir del cascarón, y demostrando a todo el mundo que son unos fregones para hacer jueguitos de palabras que no son más que patéticos intentos por llamar la atención. Y con sus pinches "firmas" muy astutas, JA!

Aprovechan el anonimato de Internet para ofender al que pueden (y además, agarraditos de la mano, ¡culeros!), me gustaría verlos en persona y solitos, a ver que tan pelotudos son.

No tienen nada que ofrecer al mundo más que sus payasadas, y tal vez las nalgas...

Fuck! Bunch of cocksucking assholes! How about you quit flooding this board with all your shit and no balls. They spend their time blowing kisses and kissing each others' asses. They think only they have the right to complain and tell us how to behave. But oh yeah, real balls to act like little children just breaking out of the shell, showing the whole world that they're so cool at their little word games that aren't anything more than calls for attention. And your cute little sigs, HA!

They take advantage of internet anonymity to offend anyone they can (not to mention holding each others' hands, asswipes!) I'd like to see you in person to see how big your balls really are.

They have nothing more to offer the world but thir clowning around, and maybe their asses...

Translator's note: Unauthorized translation of E1Skeptic's emotions.

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"Where there is clarity, there is no choice. And where there is choice, there is misery. But then, why should I speak, since I know nothing?"

[BenDover]

So you're saying that E1Skeptic wants to see everyone's balls?

Talk about your weird sexual fetishes . . .

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I have as much authority as the Pope; I just don't have as many people who believe it! - George Carlin

[Ayesha]

Damn it,

I don't have any balls !
Anybody have a set I can borrow ?
I promise to take care of them , I
just want them long enough to show
them off .

------------------
Ayesha - Lioness
_________________________
I'm out of my mind, but,
feel free to leave a message

[E1skeptic]

BenDover, bend over!

Mariachi, you owe me $10. I'll do my own translations from now on. :)

A couple of corrections:

"But oh yeah, real balls to act like little children just breaking out of the shell..." should read:

But oh yeah, real balls to attack youngsters that are just breaking out of the shell..."

And please change: "They take advantage of internet anonymity to offend anyone they can (not to mention holding each others' hands, asswipes!) I'd like to see you in person to see how big your balls really are." to:

"They take advantage of Internet anonimity to offend anyone they can (and besides they do it holding hands, *******!) I'd like to see them in person and alone, let's see if they have such big balls.

Maybe we could work out some kind of deal, si? I post, you translate, I correct. Just kidding.

¡Se lo lavan!

[E1skeptic]

Please insert one of the following where the ******* are in my previous post:

cold feet, yellow streak, coward, poltroon, dastard, sneak, wimp, dough-faced, facile, pliant.

Ayesha: Don't you have a set of balls at home that you can borrow? Why ask us? Looking for better options than the ones readily available?

[BoBettie]

E1skeptic wrote:
*picking his nose up, and taking a humongousbugger*

Here is my spelling error revenge:
from http://www.dictionary.com

bugger n : someone who engages in anal copulation (especially a male who engages in anal copulation with another male) [syn: sodomite, sodomist, sod] v : practice anal sex upon [syn: sodomize]

Have a nice day!

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Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps.
http://www.angelfire.com/ny3/zettecity/index.html

[Temujin]

Buncha sissy-assed backbiters and troll-baiters, is all. Following each other around with your noses up everyone else's ass sniffing for shit. Children mouthing off for the crowd, writing your names on the bathroom wall, pounding your chests and crying "HEY, LOOKIT ME! AIN'T I GREAT?"and
I fucking couldn't agree more Nicrz!and
AMEN!and
"ohmballaballa, ohmballaballa"and
Alas, 'tis true. It's sad to see what the Boomers have done to their children.and
Thank you, Nick!and on and on.

Well, when you people finish your circle jerk, I suggest you take a deep breath, wipe yourselves off, and open your minds.

This message board is a huge place, with lots of new people constantly coming and going. If one thread bores you, here's an idea: move on to another. If they all bore you, wait a few days and check back in. It'll all be new!

But in the end, Nickrz, if you don't like what the newer posters are doing, maybe you should resign as moderator, flee this wasteland, and open your own private site where you and your buddies can close the electronic door and do exactly as you please. THIS pit is a constantly changing, public environment. It's not meant for losers like you.

[Ayesha]

E1skeptic,
Well, yes there is a pair here that I am allowed to play with.

However, I am not allowed to take them outside to show them off.

For some strange reason The LION seems to be, well, really attached to them.

------------------
Ayesha - Lioness
_________________________
I'm out of my mind, but,
feel free to leave a message

[E1skeptic]

Ayesha/Lioness: Well, guess what... I'm VERY much attached (pun intended ;)) to my own set of balls, so maybe you should ask BenDover, or... stop! There's someone here that always want you to play with him. Maybe he'll let you borrow 'em. But... on second thought, I guess he doesn't have any. Oh, well.

[Ayesha]

Now, now, E1skeptic,
You know all men want someone to play with them !


Maybe I will have to go to the local pervert shop (adult bookstore), as we say here in Texas), and try to find a pair there.


After all, what fun would I be able to have with Wally if he removed his for me ? Oh yes I would be sure of his devotion, for a while. But what if I wanted a spleen next, or maybe a liver ?

After a while he would stop giving (or living, which ever comes first),and I would become bored.

So I think I'll stick to the LIONS set. After all I have a license that says I can play with his. Even if they are attached.

[E1skeptic]

Ayesha:

Just how did you know that I was talking about Wally? Was I THAT obvious? Or is HE that obvious? He, he, he...

Believe me, my feline co-poster, you need not borrow anyone's balls. You have just what you need.

Saludos.

[andros]

Well, it was a nice try, Nick.

No shit. If you fools could stand back and look at the crap you're spewing here in our former Holy of Holies..

You sound like a bunch of retarded rejects from a mutual admiration society.

-andros-