If the SDMB was on a summer hiatus, what would be the re-runs?

[SSG Schwartz]

If the SDMB had to stop allowing new threads, or even posts, what would you choose to fill the Boards as re-runs?

My votes would be these classic threads:

Sometimes the bad guys win (Warning not funny) (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=213577&highlight=rape)

Would you shoot and kill your child in this situation? (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=289696&highlight=shoot+kill+situation)

No you can't use my bathroom (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=324485)

So, what would you want to see as a repeat?

SSG Schwartz

[The Scrivener]

Sorry for the lazy-ass link-free posting, but OTTOMH I'd go with three "Star Wars"-related threads:

1) the very, very long (and very, very funny, although IIRC the thread posters made their arguments with the utmost seriousness, for the most part, in a manner largely devoid of self-conscious irony, which made it even funnier) thread in which obsessive SW fans and Trekkies debated the technical and military merits of the Empire/Rebel Alliance vs. the Federation, etc.;

2) the shorter but also funny thread debating just how lame the elevated tanks.. er, AT-ATs or Imperial Walkers were, WRT the limitations of their strategic and tactical utility in the field of battle;

3) the "Star Wars" pizza thread. For its peppery wit, its saucy attitude, oh stop me already.


Hey, sometimes you just feel like "nothing but Staaar Waaaaaars, don't let it end!" :D

[Alice The Goon]

Homer's monkey butler thread. One of the funniest threads ever. I couldn't find it the other day, so I wonder if it's been erased.

"Ask The" threads involving polygamy. Informative and entertaining. For my prurient side.

Baby picture threads. Love the babies.

[SSG Schwartz]

Forgot a couple of soon to be classics:

Airplane on a treadmill (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=348452&highlight=airplane+treadmill)

And... Call Me ThreadKiller (TM) (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=430906&highlight=Call+ThreadKiller%28TM%29%21)

SSG Schwartz

[olivesmarch4th]

Oh, dear. I suppose we'd have to include Thank You, Dopers, and (eventually) Pitters! (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=407718&highlight=pseudotron), the chaos that ensued, and the various scathing Pit Threads that spawned thereafter. I mean, that was a trainwreck. In other words--real, compelling drama! :D

[supervenusfreak]

Sampiro's life stories. All of them. :D

[Clothahump]

I can't believe this (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=160851) wasn't first on the list.

[BJMoose]

Waddya mean, if there were reruns. Seems most of the threads in GD these days are reruns.

Anyhew. . .

I'd pick the Corrupt Wish Game from a few years back. It had some of the cleverest writing I've ever seen on these boards. Alas, it got caught up in the Great Game Thread Crackdown; otherwise, that sucker would probably still be going on.

[Harmonious Discord]

Transference drinking a brew with a Dead Man’s Toe? (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=379605&highlight=drinking+alaska)

[ivylass]

I can't believe this (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=160851) wasn't first on the list.

Scylla's a Guest? WTH? :(

[Rico]

It's gotta be Halfsie, the Two-Legged Dog (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=51807&highlight=Halvsie).

I snerk every time I read that.

[Governor Quinn]

The thread on the reality of scalar weapons would be a good one, and, given its massive length, might be able to fill a large section of the summer schedule by itself.

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=202225

[Lsura]

If LoTR had been written by someone else? (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=138905&highlight=LOTR+written)

[Harmonious Discord]

Americans - are fries and bacon always finger food? (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=343477&page=1&pp=40&highlight=bacon)
Half way through the Americans, Canadians and English realize that we call different meat bacon. This then begs the question of which one does bacon salt taste like.

[Shayna]

Thread (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=26280)

Paging Eve! I'm not Eve, but. . . (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=328476)

Funny things said during love making/intimate moments... (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=24960)

[Yumblie]

Kids vs Teachers (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=263501) was such a fun, bizarrely epic thread that it will be exciting even in syndication.

[Darth Sensitive]

Ooh. I'd like to nominate the "Ask the Hulk" thread. Can some one dredge up a link to that and the Star Wars ones up higher. I wish I had the ability to search the board.

I also enjoyed the aborted Superman/Spiderman SWAP stories.

[Aioua]

The Electric Sun (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=378726) thread has always been a favorite of mine. Nutball theory, but with a happy ending. Hope TheFonz is doin okay.
Okay, so prolly no one else remembers this one, but it was one of the ones that got me started on here.
Okay, so prolly no one else here knows who I am but... um... :smack:

[Wallenstein]

The various threads on leaving tips in restaurants are all the same anyway, so could be run in random orders ad nauseam.

[Annie-Xmas]

This week's reruns has to include World Trade Center Plane Crash (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=86458).

History as it unfolds.

[Kyla]

The Case of the Missing Coworker (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=190562&highlight=missing+coworker) of course!

The "Would You Shoot Your Child" thread mentioned in the OP is one of my favorite threads ever, though. Sometimes when I'm bored and need a laugh I reread it.

[The Scrivener]

In partial accomodation to our sith friend, Darth Sensitive, a guest w/o archival search privileges, here's one of those Star Wars threads. Join me, and we will rule the Internet together, as Dope charter member and protege Dope member... okay, I'll stop now. (Seriously, though there's pages of archived SW threads to enjoy, so you'd might as well plunk down your $15 and geek out with us.)

Don't underestimate the power of the pepperoni! (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=279415&highlight=pizza+Chicago-style)

[Lionne]

Don't forget to turn the power off!

[Darth Sensitive]

I plan on it. The CC company is being a pain in issuing a card. I have some time left on my guest-ship, but will convert to real memberness ASAP.

And that's great. No lie.

[bbs2k]

You guys are playing way too nice, doesn't anybody else love a good trainwreck in the Pit? For some contemporary examples, I'll take the RSSchen/MizGrand series; as well as anything Badchad.

For classics I'll take a good Pit thread regarding Roland Deschain's lovelife.

[Swampwolf]

Return of the Princess Bride Jedi (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=54123) has always been one of my favorites

[ivylass]

Can I nominate one of mine? (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=244421)

[Harmonious Discord]

There was another missing coworker thread that occurred maybe a year ago.


I found this thread that I started about a vacation I had. Most of the vacation problems aren't even mentioned, but the whole 9 days went like this. The place we went to later in the week, was the same place that my brothers experienced the July 4th dynamite brush pile celebration night. The only people that believe the story, are close family members, that experienced this vacation from hell. I still don't know if the missing people were found. I might have to write more of this adventure, because life can be humorous in a sadistic way.

Vacation in “Jack Bupkus You’ll Regret Staying” (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=379829)

[ThirdCultureGal]

What, Beryl_Mooncalf 's meltdown isn't even mentioned yet? Funniest thing I'd read in a long time.. My search skills aren't up to snuff yet, can someone find it?

[bbs2k]

What, Beryl_Mooncalf 's meltdown isn't even mentioned yet? Funniest thing I'd read in a long time.. My search skills aren't up to snuff yet, can someone find it?You have a taste for the classics, which I enjoy. I fear though that no one will find that thread for you since it involves at least two uses of the search function and therefore is not worth our time.









Okay, fine, with minor nudging you went ahead and posted attractive pictures of yourself in my other thread so I'll oblige. :)

Question for Beryl_Mooncalf (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=211820)

Here is the long and skinny:So, you're sharing the username with others, admit to deliberately pushing people's buttons for the hell of it, and repeatedly break our rules with regards to copyright violations. In addition, it looks like you are posing as a lawyer, and it is doubtful whether you actually are one.

I think that tells me enough. It's been a pleasure, I'm sure.

[bbs2k]

I would like to add, that while searching for the above link you sometimes end up tripping over some often lost gems. I give you: where can I get a strap-in dildo? (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=200412) by our Guest, Anal Scurvy.

PS: My spell check is flagging "dildo", odd.

[ThirdCultureGal]

Thanks, bigbabysweets2000, both for finding the Beryl_Mooncalf -thread and posting an extra too! I always enjoy reading "new" funny-bizarre threads :D

[SSG Schwartz]

BBS2000,

I had never seen Beryl_Mooncalf 's meltdown before, thanks for that laugh. Next up is my reading of the dildo thread.

I do think the SDMB would survive reruns.

SSG Schwartz

[SSG Schwartz]

Good Og, the dildo thread was the funniest thing I have ever read here. That shall be saved for sweeps week.

SSG Schwartz