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View Full Version : How Can a Straight or Bi-Curious Man Be Seduced?


NetPlay525
10-25-2000, 05:53 PM
This is a somewhat serious question. Almost every one of my gay friends has at one time "scored" with a straight man (probably bi-curious) at some time. They say frat guys and military guys are the easiest (basically you have to do the servicing and the straight guys just lies back and enjoys it). I've never had the experience and wonder how this seduction can be accomplished? Like I said, almost every gay man I know has said he's seduced at least one straight guy (in some cases many guys). Thanks for any input.

kunilou
10-25-2000, 06:00 PM
I would imagine someone getting drunk is an important assist in matters like these. That's just a guess, as I have no first-hand experience.

And after all, they do call them "curious."

Cartooniverse
10-25-2000, 06:12 PM
I can't figure out of this entire thread is a set-up for cheap innuendo. Me, I'll take it at face value :D

I'm curious enough. I'm simply terrified of getting a filovirus that would wreck me. I think A LOT of men are curious about giving head to a man. And, as for the " military and frat boys" idea= hell, what makes you think a nice art school graduate doesn't like getting head? Hmph. I'd WAG that the really meaty question (g) here is, how do you get a straight/bi man to GIVE you head, not let you give them head.

It goes to insecurities, self-image, sexual identity...... I'd guess the curiosity is the same for women who are more or less straight, who've wondered what it would be like, etc.etc.

Cartooniverse

panache45
10-25-2000, 07:05 PM
I'd WAG that the really meaty question (g) here is, how do you get a straight/bi man to GIVE you head, not let you give them head.

I'm one of those rare gay men who loves to GET head, but not to GIVE it. And you'd be amazed how many "straight" or "bi" guys love to give it, without being seduced or drunk.

BlackKnight
10-25-2000, 07:12 PM
It wouldn't take much to seduce me; I've always wondered what it would be like to give a guy head.

Of course, with all my homophobic friends, I'd never admit to this. Heck, I'm surprised I've admitted this online!

*sneaks away, blushing*

panache45
10-25-2000, 07:20 PM
Where do you live?

NetPlay525
10-26-2000, 11:15 AM
Originally posted by panache45
I'd WAG that the really meaty question (g) here is, how do you get a straight/bi man to GIVE you head, not let you give them head.

I'm one of those rare gay men who loves to GET head, but not to GIVE it. And you'd be amazed how many "straight" or "bi" guys love to give it, without being seduced or drunk.

OK, so this takes me back to the original reason why I'm asking this question. I've heard lots of times how "easy" it is to score with a straight guy and how available they are. What I'm asking for is specifics ... how do you know if they might be interested and what tactics have you used succesfully? I'm always afraid to initiate since I'm unlucky enough to pick the guy that will give me a fist as a response. Thanks again for any ideas

RainbowDragon
10-26-2000, 01:32 PM
People in general are susceptible to flattery and have the need for contact with other people. I don’t care if you are gay, straight, or bi; there is a need to be with other human beings. Men like to be felt needed and appreciated too, and with a lot of men their sex drive can overtake them. Women seem to have better control of their sex drive (I said SEEM).

If a gay man is very attentive to a straight man and his needs (whatever they may be), the straight man will become attracted to him in some regard. Maybe it is just a friendship, maybe something more. If that gay man can make the other man feel appreciated, cared for, powerful, or otherwise special; the gay man opens a door. A seriously straight man might feel his defenses eroded away and gives into the encounter. For example, the musical “Kiss of the Spider Woman” where a rugged heterosexual prisoner becomes attached to his effeminate homosexual cellmate. Why? Because the gay cellmate treated his wounds, told him stories to forget about prison, and did what he could to help him.

Men grow up with feelings that if they give into a homosexual encounter that it makes them a “fag”, a sub-creature that is less than human. These feelings are bad, and men need to realize that an alternative lifestyle is not evil.

Too much pressure is exerted on certain men to be straight and especially masculine. This is very much so in military ranks, frats, etc. This pressure works both ways. Sometimes it works in controlling the men to act and behave masculine. Sometimes it awakens that hidden desire in all of us to not conform to the majority of those around us. This may be why those groups are especially vulnerable.

My personal opinion is not to worry about being straight, bi, or even gay. Just love whom you want to love. Labeling you sexual identity can lead to problems if your choices don’t match the label. Better not to worry about labels and live your life in the way you feel is proper and good.

One wish of mine is for men to handle an approach by another man better. A man shouldn’t feel insulted if another man asks him out on a date. If you “don’t swing that way”, be polite and tell the other guy “no thank you”. Feel flattered that other person found you attractive and desirable. Don’t feel that your macho image has been tarnished, because it hasn’t.

Irishman
10-26-2000, 01:45 PM
I think we need some definitions. How can a straight guy want to give head? By definition, if he wants to suck dick, he ain't straight. Bisexual, maybe bi-curious, but not straight.

I suppose you could argue do you define by their interest or by their participation. If one engages in homosexual acts, is one "a homosexual"? By one way of looking at it, it's a tautology. A homosexual is one who engages in homosexual acts. The act of giving head once means you're a homosexual, at least to a limited degree. The flipside interpretation is to argue that if a person is not interested in the same sex, does not pursue the same sex, and does not typically engage in same gender sex, that person is not homosexual. Happening to have a guy blow them once out of curiousity or sharing some contact with another during a multi-party mixed gender orgy doesn't make a person a homosexual as just engaged in some homosexual acts.

Isn't that all a little too confusing? Like RainbowDragon said, why worry about labels?

SqrlCub
10-26-2000, 01:48 PM
Check out the movie, "Farewell My Concubine" to see it happen. Although, it doesn't happen until near the end and there is no actual sex, but it implies that it would have happened if some other things in the movie didn't happen. (I can't say it without giving it away.) It is one of my favourite movies.

Like Black Knight, many straight men are interested in oral sex between men. In the right setting it is not too difficult to pick other men up. I have never done it personally but have seen it done with some friends. Usually alcohol is involved but not necessarily.

My friend, Tommie, used to like to pick up straight men. He would go into a straight bar or such, get guy A drunk and later take them to someplace private or his house. I don't think it was a very honourable thing of him to do but he liked it and I suppose the guys did on the surface. I was in the other room one time when he was servicing some guy and after he was finished and the guy was leaving he said to Tommie, "If you ever tell anyone what I did, I will kill you." Which was something that just excited Tommie more. I hope he is doing well now and not murdered. Personally, I not only think it is dishonourable, I also think it is a very dangerous past time for a gay man to pursue.

Oh, it is also easy enough to find "straight" men who are married to women to have sex with. They troll bars, parks, baths, etc and some are even so bold as to still wear their wedding rings, talk about their wives, their kids, and how no one knows what they like to do in bed. As sexuality falls within a sliding scale, (according to Kinsey) I think most people who have any form of gay sex would probably be around a 2.5 where 0 is completely straight and 10 is completely gay.

HUGS!
Sqrl

jb_farley
10-26-2000, 01:58 PM
OPed by Netplay525
I'm always afraid to initiate since I'm unlucky enough to pick the guy that will give me a fist as a response


some would say that's actually lucky.

jb

panache45
10-26-2000, 02:19 PM
Originally posted by Irishman
How can a straight guy want to give head? By definition, if he wants to suck dick, he ain't straight. Bisexual, maybe bi-curious, but not straight.

Long ago, I stopped being amazed at how many guys love to give head or receive anally, yet claim that they're 100% straight. I've wanted to shake them by the shoulders and yell, "for God's sake, man, look what you just did!!! How can you call yourself straight???" But obviously this would not be a very cool thing to say.

When a guy expresses interest in me, I take that interest at face value. I don't ask him whether he's gay, bi or straight. People have an infinite capacity to rationalize doing something that doesn't correlate with their own self-image. If a guy wants to give head and still considers himself straight, that's his business, and his issue to deal with on his own. And if he doesn't want to discuss it with me, that's ok. Some of these guys even tell "fag" jokes, and it's, sadly, just a very obvious defense mechanism.

And, by the way, I have NEVER pursued someone who didn't, in some way, reciprocate my interest in him. I'm not interested in "recruiting" anyone.

C3
10-26-2000, 02:28 PM
Just out of curiousity...if you're gay, why would you want to have sex (or any of the accessories) with someone who's straight? I'm a heterosexual woman and I don't think I've ever really even thought about having sex with a homosexual person. Is it the challenge? Or that you'd be the first? Is it like Sqrl's friend...the risk of running into a dangerous situation?
I'm not making any sort of judgement statement or anything like that...just wondering.

SqrlCub
10-26-2000, 02:54 PM
I never understood Tommie. I think straight people are too icky (on many different levels) to have sex with by and large. I always thought of Tommie as a sexual predator in a way but the fact that his "prey" reciprocated most of the time and were all adults who knew what they were doing made me not think too much of it. Personally, I would only make an exception of pursuing a straight person if they were a specific Claus or Asner person, but that is just me and in real life I think I would chicken out there too.

HUGS!
Sqrl

BlackKnight
10-26-2000, 03:05 PM
Originally posted by panache45
Where do you live?

Minnesota.

Willing to buy me dinner first? ;)

manhattan
10-26-2000, 06:26 PM
Originally posted by NetPlay525
What I'm asking for is specifics ... how do you know if they might be interested and what tactics have you used succesfully? I'm always afraid to initiate since I'm unlucky enough to pick the guy that will give me a fist as a response.

Ah, an advice thread. I was wondering where I was eventually going to move it.

Off to MPSIMS.

NetPlay525
10-26-2000, 06:54 PM
Originally posted by C3
Just out of curiousity...if you're gay, why would you want to have sex (or any of the accessories) with someone who's straight? I'm a heterosexual woman and I don't think I've ever really even thought about having sex with a homosexual person. Is it the challenge? Or that you'd be the first? Is it like Sqrl's friend...the risk of running into a dangerous situation?
I'm not making any sort of judgement statement or anything like that...just wondering.

This is hard to explain without offending someone. Frankly I think a lot of people mistake being gay with being feminine. I have nothing against the "queen" gays who are a terrific part of the gay community ... but I know the reason I'm gay (and many gay people I know) is that I'm attracted to masculine men. I happen to hate that term "straight-acting" because I know some straights that act like fruits (or straight women who are "butch"). The desire to have an encounter with a straight man is that they're overt and organic masculinity is hot. I would think there are lesbians who fantasize about "straight" women because they are attracted to their femininity. Let's put it this way ... would you rather service Nathan Lane or Ben Affleck?

handy
10-27-2000, 09:44 AM
" They say frat guys and military
guys are the easiest"


Is that because they have a hard time finding women?

Bottle of Smoke
10-27-2000, 10:13 AM
I think this story (http://www.theonion.com/onion3638/area_man_experimenting.html) in the Onion ties in extremely well with this discussion.

Heh, heh.

Doobieous
10-27-2000, 08:21 PM
I've never done this, and I think the risk is too high to attempt it, but, a friend over IM's tells me that he easily lands straight guys from the military base nearby (he says there's a ton of them who are easy lays). He pretty much said he starts talking to them, and then if they get to a point where they talk about how horny they are, he starts flirting big time with them, saying things that excite them. He says with military it's pretty easy. He, like Sqrl's friend often goes for straight guys and worked on one guy for about 3 years before he got any headway with the guy. His theory as to why he has an easy time seducing straight guys is that he says he doesnt act femme at all, so they dont feel as if their masculinity is insulted (in his humble opinion). But, it's not something I would attempt. I guess the thrill is the big part of it...

dropzone
10-27-2000, 10:50 PM
My scoutmaster(!) told a story once about his Navy days. Some of the guys would have plenty of money long after everybody else and one of the guys asked why.

"Simple! When you on leave go to a gay bar, pick up a guy, and beat him up when you get outside."

The guy tried it and ended up with several stitches in his dick. He didn't start beating the fellow up until his dick was in his mouth.


Now, SqrlCub, if you keep saying such nice things about Ed Asner and my sunburn, you're liable to turn this straight boy's head! :giggle:

Road Rash
10-28-2000, 10:18 PM
Never tried the homo thing before, but I would argue against the notion that if a straight person does a homo act, he is not straight. A couple of my straight friends have admitted of trying it once, and beleive me, they are NOT gay. They both played the man when they tried it.

I have been hit on by gays before (It was good actually trolling the beer for a change), and gay dudes love to party, but dudes are icky to me. If I had a gun to my head and was ordered to do a homo act? Bend over, cause NOTHING is going up my ass.

matt_mcl
10-29-2000, 12:52 AM
I think that a straight guy who has gay sex isn't necessarily bi, simply because I think that if I had sex with a woman, I wouldn't stop being gay.

waterj2
10-29-2000, 01:17 AM
Just felt like checking in as both a frat guy and a military guy. Nice to see I'm being labelled as easy before I even get here.

Irishman
10-30-2000, 06:32 PM
My point was that the labels are inadequate and misleading.

Not to start a great debate, but to give a somewhat different example - pedophiles. When men "play" with boys, does that make them gay? Obviously that isn't the problem whether they're gay or straight, but that they molest children. But do you call a man straight if his sexual interest is not in adult women, but in little boys? (Well, perverted is one word for it, but orientationwise he isn't heterosexual.)

Don't take that to mean anything more than what's written. I'm by no means trying to equate homosexuality with pedophilia.

The distinction I guess I'm trying to make is are you a homosexual for engaging in sex acts with a member of the same sex, or are you a homosexual for defining your arousal off lust for the same sex, even if you never participate? And if not the former, what do you call someone who engages in sex acts with the same sex but not because they are aroused by men? Straight doesn't seem right, either.

Again, what's with the labels? Why worry about it? Why am I worrying about it?

(Can sense what's coming on that last question.)

Munkie
10-30-2000, 06:52 PM
Actually, gays aren't as bad as the public makes them out to be. I know some people who just came out recently and said they were either gay or bi. The first time I heard someone say it, my first thought was... "At least he can admit it". I don't have a problem with gays. Me, I'm not gay, but they are rather nice people if you get to know them. Most people will shun gays because they think that if they are seen with a gay or a bi that they will be considered gay or bi as well, and that's not the truth. I have one gay friend and one bi friend [that I know of], and they've been some of the best friends I've ever known. I still think it's quite astonishing of how their sexual preference can influence the public's opionion towards them.