Aging Vietnam Veteran Transexuals are Impossible to Please

[lobstermobster]

All I wanted was a pitcher of margaritas and a patio to drink it on.

After a particular grueling week ethically wrangling a bunch of doctors, this was the first thing I thought when I woke up to a beautiful day on Saturday. Some yelp research and boyfriend bickering later, the two of us along with a friend whose roommate had sexiled him to the streets, head out of Margtown. We get there and the margs are too expensive for what they are and there is no outdoor seating. I am cranky especially since it had just taken 45 minutes to hail a cab and get there.

We start to wander discussing the nature of the “sobering hills” of San Francisco. I decide that Sobering Hills sounds like a subdivision of cookie cutter houses you find in the suburbs. But seriously, 2 hills of SF and the buzz is knocked out of you.

We see up ahead a sign that says “30 specialty tequilas!” and literally without even asking each other we just turn and walk into this place.

We drink and drink and talk and drink and talk and fight a little but mostly just talk and drink and laugh. Its about 2 hours in that we realize it’s a gay bar. We don’t care, they have a patio. We didn’t realize though that everyone else DEFINITELY cared that we were there.

Its getting later and I am getting drunker. I have met a flight attendant from my hometown (Nashville) and we are trying to figure out someone we both know to talk shit about. No such luck. We were all sitting outside in a conversation area as follows:

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2156/1590463915_74fd0a3d08_o.jpg

Okay so I realize that I was probably being loud talking over people but not so loud that I would have been disturbing anyone other than my own boyfriend, who was actively engaged in a conversation with a man clearly trying to convince him of some sort of religious hooey.

Then, to my right, this aging Vietnam veteran transsexual who I had talked to off and on all night procedes to tell me that a dark cloud has been over the bar since my friends and I came in. She was offended that I was talking about Nashville in front of her because she couldn’t join in on that conversation. She told me it’s rude of me and how this and other reasons she’s noticed from watching me makes me the epitome of everything that is wrong with my generation. A mature adult would never talk about something that not everyone in the group could talk about.

Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue. I’m sorry but since when do I carry with me a 57 year old war veteran transsexual with PTSD and apparently boundary issues whose needs I should concern myself with addressing?

I’m opening my mouth to start my “Listen bitch….” Rant when my attention is called by the person to my LEFT who wants to tell me how much he hates me. This whole time my boyfriend has been listening to this man tell him he is a part of God and how I am all wrong for him because I am lost in my conversation with the people to my right and don’t even know that they exist. He procedes to tell me that I am a sorry excuse for a girlfriend and a friend at that. My boyfriend here is a part of God and is very special. I, however, could be a part of God. The implications are clear.

What the fuck is wrong with this place? I have never been anywhere where people are just so open and honest about telling strangers that they hate them. And it was all directled at me! I am not a bad person! Sorta.

Oh yeah and sometime during all of this my friend across from me got really wasted and fell off the barstool he had dragged outside. It was time to boogey.

Trans-asaurus Rex asked for my phone number though. Wants to have lunch for some reason. Wonder if she’ll call.

[Pine Fresh Scent]

Great picture!

So what did "angry with broom" do?

[Encinitas]

I love your graphic but could you clarify a few terms for me? Some yelp research [snip] whose roommate had sexiled him to the streets...
Other than that, yeah, WTF was up at that place?

[Miller]

And was he "Angry, with broom," or was he really "angry with broom?"

"Fuck you, broom! I hate you!"

[DiosaBellissima]

Isn't it odd how people who face horrible persecution are usually the quickest to throw stones?

I'm a fat ass, but my friend is little- at the time, a size 3 or 4. She went into Lane Bryant with me because a: I needed to buy clothes and b: she loves their jewelery. As she's giggling and going through the jewelery, a line of middle aged heifers start making loud comments about how "anorexic" she is and how unhealthy it is to be that skinny (coming out of the lips of a woman who was easily 350 lbs, I found that laughable). These women were at least 35 and my friend was obviously 15 or 16.

It just was surprising to me, because you'd think fat women would know what it's like to be picked on for their size, so why on earth would they do the same to someone who is obviously a kid?

Fuckin' cows.

Yeah, makes no sense to me.

[Kythereia]

From the picture, I really hope your friend's doing okay...

[Waverly]

I must conclude that one of their 30 tequila's contains peyote.

...oh, and take an art class.

[lobstermobster]

I love your graphic but could you clarify a few terms for me?
Other than that, yeah, WTF was up at that place?

yelp is a website with bar and restaurant reviews.

being sexiled is when your roomate is having his girlfriend over and plans on having sex all over the apartment and tells you that you have to leave for a while. You get exiled.

[askeptic]

Wow. You obviously hang out at the wrong type of bar...

[Southern Yankee]

Were there any... ants??!!?? :p

[Encinitas]

yelp is a website with bar and restaurant reviews.

being sexiled is when your roomate is having his girlfriend over and plans on having sex all over the apartment and tells you that you have to leave for a while. You get exiled.
Ah! Thank you for the clarification. So why don't you yelp that bar and see if there are any warnings about Aging Vietnam Veteran Transexuals (AVVT). Or if not, write a review. :D

[Yeticus Rex]

...oh, and take an art class.
Nyet. This IS art.

Another +3 in your Charisma attribute for you, LM. That red bow is getting a little frayed from all of your legendary battles against those 7 year old transsexual ants. Maybe you should upgrade to a +5 Bow of the Valkyries. ;)

[bbs2k]

You look hot in that pic.

More pleez.

[Cat Whisperer]

I must conclude that one of their 30 tequila's contains peyote.

...oh, and take an art class.
No way, man. These drawings are gold. I fear any formal training would sap their - je ne sais quois.

It sounds like a good afternoon in a bar for some twenty-somethings, to me. Getting loud and people arguing and falling off bar stools - business as usual, if I can recall that far back.

[lobstermobster]

No way, man. These drawings are gold. I fear any formal training would sap their - je ne sais quois.

It sounds like a good afternoon in a bar for some twenty-somethings, to me. Getting loud and people arguing and falling off bar stools - business as usual, if I can recall that far back.

except the fact that I was singled out as being a perfect example of the rampant assholism everywhere. Not everyone has to like me but this was ridiculous

[Kalhoun]

Don't eat the brown acid, man!

[Omegaman]

Once again youv'e outdone yourself with the artwork! Bravo ! Oh, and feel to speak about whatever you like in public. It's public and stuff.

[eleanorigby]

Did I miss the bit about the flag? (why does BF have a flag?) And I love the glasses. You changed your bow (was that to match your outfit?)

I think you should find another place for cheap drinks....

[Sapo]

LM, from now on I will start my days at the SDMB doing a search for your threads. I just can't get enough of your pics and your stories.

[Celyn]

Ooh, I liked the pics: I only hope no-one ever makes a rule that all threads must be illustrated 'cos then the drawing-impaired like me would be gone. However, I,'m also nosey about

- health of friend who fell on floor

- angry person with broom

- flag of boyfriend

And I'm a tiny bit concerned that the broom might have been constructed out of the hair of boyfriend and of Vietnam person. :eek:

[lobstermobster]

hah I have to illustrate everything. I do this by hand on bar napkins. I'm awful so they always end up being some sort of vegetable with arms and legs and a face wielding weapons. the Paint computer program is my true medium though. It lets me really express myself in ways that words fail.

angry with broom is the guy who works at the bar that had to clean up all the broken glass that resulted from my friend's tumble. Friend is fine which I didn't know until much later. We went to another bar so my clumsy friend from Cleveland could watch bazeball. I cheered loudly and wildly for both sides. But I still wasn't as loud as the IM-A-WHITE-45-YEAR-OLD-MAN-WITH-A-DEEP-LOUD-VOICE-THAT-GOES-TO-SPORTS-BARS-AFTER-WORK-THAT-CLAPS-LOUDLY-WHEN-I-THINK-SOMETHING-IS-FUNNY-OR-WHEN-MY-TEAM-SCORES-IM-SO-LOUD-AND-IMPORTANT

the bf is from Finland which I think is a reasonable thing to tease him about. So he is always represented with a flag from the motherland.

[Celyn]

Ah, after I posted and went away from computer, I had a sudden epiphany about where "Angry, With Broom" would fit in. Sort of obvious, really. Me is thick. I had some notion that the flag might be Danish but, well, ignorance fought, and I suppose I was *roughly* in the right area. :)

Wishing you a mellow happy QUIET time next time you go out. :)

[Freudian Slit]

yelp is a website with bar and restaurant reviews.

being sexiled is when your roomate is having his girlfriend over and plans on having sex all over the apartment and tells you that you have to leave for a while. You get exiled.
I thought sexiling only happened in college, when people shared one room. I can't imagine telling someone to leave the entire apartment.

As for angry guy with broom--yeah, I can see why he's so pissed. Assholes falling down and knocking over glass are obnoxious.

[lobstermobster]

I thought sexiling only happened in college, when people shared one room. I can't imagine telling someone to leave the entire apartment.

As for angry guy with broom--yeah, I can see why he's so pissed. Assholes falling down and knocking over glass are obnoxious.


nope you can be sexiled at any point in your life. And about my friend falling down, he didnt have to be so angry! Sometimes, occasionally, things can get out of hand.

[magellan01]

Trans-asaurus Rex...

Nice. Seriously. It made me laugh. As did much of your OP.

[eleanorigby]

Funny Finland story: My daughter and I went to the UK for a visit. We went to Durham and took a tour of the castle and uni there. Our guide was from Finland. At the beginning, she asked everyone where they were from. We "won" the round, seeing that we're from near Chicago. The guide got very excited and said, "You're from Illinois! I've been there. I went on a foreign exchange visit one summer to Macomb in August. I got off the little plane I had flown from Chicago and I fainted from the heat."

We chuckled over the heat and all the corn.

and now back to the thread.....

[HazelNutCoffee]

I was not expecting ... that ... when I clicked on the picture. Freakin' hilarious.

[Autolycus]

What do you have against Vietnamese people!

[Rhubarb]

What do you have against Vietnamese people!
I think she's okay with them until they get drunk and accuse her of making transexual brooms angry.

[threnodyangelfire]

Thank you for brightening an otherwise really grey day for me with your illustration. It rocks.

[Annie]

Wanna change my nick now!


Signed,

Angry, with broom.


Comma-yes or no?

[TokyoBayer]

I am a little concerned. You seem to have lost weight in this photo. It's not healthy. If fact everyone in the photo seems too skinny.

[bbs2k]

Silly TP. Everyone knows that anorexia isn't a disease, it's just a stronger commitment for skinny people to remain beautiful.

(Real life note: please don't starve yourself)

[Daffyd]

Damn I miss the city! I haven't run into ONE aging Vietnam Veteran Transexual with PTSD and boundary issues since I left.

Lots of aging Vietnam Veteran Transexuals with PTSD and no boundary issues, of course... and lots of Civilian Aging Transexuals with PTSD and boundary issues, sure... But you hit the motherlode!

What neighborhood was this in? I wanna make sure I stop in when I go home to visit...

[Merneith]

Sexiled is genius verbiage. And Transasaurus was totally flirting with you.

[Little Plastic Ninja]

Silly TP. Everyone knows that anorexia isn't a disease, it's just a stronger commitment for skinny people to remain beautiful.

(Real life note: please don't starve yourself)

I just giggled for five minutes straight.

Thank you. :p

[TokyoBayer]

Ya, ya. I set up the joke and bbs2k gets the funny lines and all the chicks.

[dropzone]

the bf is from Finland which I think is a reasonable thing to tease him about. And, to me, that makes sense. Add me to the list of people who appreciate your illustration and story. I'm not going to have to go to MPSIMS to read more, will I? I got off the little plane I had flown from Chicago and I fainted from the heat. That's how you know she wasn't lying about being in Macomb.

[Rick]

::: Checks link:::
Wow! lobstermobster a serious babe. Pictures that sexy are almost NSFW.

[OneCentStamp]

"Aging Vietnam Veteran Transexuals are Impossible to Please?" Totally false. You just have to remember that they don't have a clitoris, so you have to concentrate your attentions on...oh, um...never mind.

[SaharaTea]

Nothing to add except that I love your illustrations, especially this one (http://www.flickr.com/photos/lesliek615/1418509678/).

[lobstermobster]

Ya, ya. I set up the joke and bbs2k gets the funny lines and all the chicks.

I'm missing something.... I didn't get the joke

[Shayna]

Nothing to add except that I love your illustrations, especially this one (http://www.flickr.com/photos/lesliek615/1418509678/). Me, too! I'm dying to know what this one (http://www.flickr.com/photos/lesliek615/176101040/) is all about. Hilarious!

[lobstermobster]

Me, too! I'm dying to know what this one (http://www.flickr.com/photos/lesliek615/176101040/) is all about. Hilarious!

flickr wont work for me at work (trying to make sure employees don't goof off all day long drawing things on ms paint) so youll have to describe anything you want explained.

[OneCentStamp]

flickr wont work for me at work (trying to make sure employees don't goof off all day long drawing things on ms paint) so youll have to describe anything you want explained.Two words for you: Legs. Spleen. :)

[lobstermobster]

Two words for you: Legs. Spleen. :)
Here you go dumdum, I just copy and pasted from the other time I had to explain this:

This is essentially a picture of me and my best friend. She's really really tall and has really long thin legs. So I just teased her and called her "Legs" and eventually it caught on. Her last name is Kehoe. Self explanatory. She decided that I should have a body part nickname too. The trouble with that is I'm 5'4 and proportional and one part of my body doesn't stick out like her and her legs. So she picked something on my insides. Spleen. King is my last name (please don't find me and kill me now) so it just went from Spleen King to "the Spleen King" hence the crown.

I actually get a ton of mail addressed to this name. Legs lives in another state and so one thing we have that we can torment each other with is signing each other up for wacky free shit in the mail. 1000 Japanese Condoms addressed to Legs Kehoe? Free information packets on STDs addressed to Spleen King? A free video from the Hair Club for Men for Legs? Its all been done.

[TokyoBayer]

I'm missing something.... I didn't get the jokeIt wasn't that much of one. I made a joke, a sort of sly remark and nothing like the over-the-top, appeal to the mass-market, least-common denominator joke which bbs2k followed up, all based on my original humor, not just some old copy-cat shit, but who got the laughs from the girls? (I'm under the impression from somewhere that Ninja is a woman.)




And fuck no, I'm not bitter.

[Kyla]

lobstermobster, do you have a LiveJournal? I kinda want to friend you. And go drinking with you next time I'm in San Francisco.

[Hostile Dialect]

And it was all directled at me! I am not a bad person!

I dunno, I heard that you shot the bird at a box of kittens once or something.

And was he "Angry, with broom," or was he really "angry with broom?"

"Fuck you, broom! I hate you!"

Well, he really is glaring at that broom.

Sexiled is genius verbiage.

To be fair, I heard that word back in 1998 on Dr. Laura. :eek: (Sorry, I was a conservative little kid back then.)

Anyway, we're all missing the point here: transsexual Vietnamese brooms from Cleveland are taking over America's bars and churches! Where's the outrage, people?!

[lobstermobster]

I dunno, I heard that you shot the bird at a box of kittens once or something.



Well, he really is glaring at that broom.



To be fair, I heard that word back in 1998 on Dr. Laura. :eek: (Sorry, I was a conservative little kid back then.)

Anyway, we're all missing the point here: transsexual Vietnamese brooms from Cleveland are taking over America's bars and churches! Where's the outrage, people?!

I never claimed to have invented "sexiled" I actually stole it from I am Charlotte Simmons by Tom Woolf. I have two blogs actually. One is just regular personal blog and the other is just about my thoughts about issues in animal testing in medical research. Both of these only have two entries before I just forgot about it. I really want to try to keep up with my animal blog though. I like having an outlet to gibber about it.

[saoirse]

Are you on Facebook? I'd really like to po...

Sorry? Hang on.

I'll be right back.

[bouv]

(please don't find me and kill me now)

But if I somehow manage to kill you without finding you first, that would be acceptable? :confused:

I'm just trying to understand the rules, here. :p

[lobstermobster]

But if I somehow manage to kill you without finding you first, that would be acceptable? :confused:

I'm just trying to understand the rules, here. :p

If you can kill me without finding me that'll be it. You win. You'll have my eternal respect [from the grave]

[OneCentStamp]

But if I somehow manage to kill you without finding you first, that would be acceptable? :confused:

I'm just trying to understand the rules, here. :p[aside to bouv] That's why you hire a middle man. A fixer, if you will. You don't gotta find nothin'. [/aside to bouv]

[lobstermobster]

[aside to bouv] That's why you hire a middle man. A fixer, if you will. You don't gotta find nothin'. [/aside to bouv]

nope thats proxy murder. its gotta be him

[jali]

I never claimed to have invented "sexiled" I actually stole it from I am Charlotte Simmons by Tom Woolf. I have two blogs actually. One is just regular personal blog and the other is just about my thoughts about issues in animal testing in medical research. Both of these only have two entries before I just forgot about it. I really want to try to keep up with my animal blog though. I like having an outlet to gibber about it.

I loved I Am Charlotte Simmons.

back to our regularly scheduled show...

[Lord Ashtar]

*pokes you on the shoulder*

"He doesn't like you."

"I'm sorry."

"I don't like you either. You just watch yourself. We're wanted men. I have the death sentence in twelve systems."

At this point, the angry guy comes over and cuts him in half with his broom.

[Zebra]

No he just cuts off the forearm.

[Lord Ashtar]

If Obi-Wan had been angry, he would've cut off more than a forearm.

[Triskadecamus]

I believe we are witnessing the birth of a new internet art form. Hand illustrated journalism. It has that ground level everyman feel to it. It has an inimitable "art of the ordinary" quality that won't survive sophistication, or polish.

LobsterMobster, you are the pioneer of a new era in human expression! Thanks.

Tris

[eleanorigby]

LM--can you draw me? I don't wear glasses or bows, have shoulder length blonde curly-ish hair, and blue eyes. I'm a nurse studying to be a librarian.

Does that help?


True artists draw commissions (don't hurt me for the pun). You are on your way to FAME!

[lobstermobster]

LM--can you draw me? I don't wear glasses or bows, have shoulder length blonde curly-ish hair, and blue eyes. I'm a nurse studying to be a librarian.

Does that help?


True artists draw commissions (don't hurt me for the pun). You are on your way to FAME!

I have it all worked out in my mind grapes. I'll do this at work while avoiding my pocket-sized British boss. [hate]

[bbs2k]

As corny as it is, I would choose to be immortalized as an lolcat (http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2267/1634762459_1d723ecddf.jpg) .

[Derleth]

I am Charlotte Simmonsand you're not.

Are you sure the vet wasn't a Tranh-sexual? It's hard to be sure, especially with Vietnam vets.

[eleanorigby]

I have it all worked out in my mind grapes. I'll do this at work while avoiding my pocket-sized British boss. [hate]


I'm gonna look like grapes?!?



:eek:




(and the pocket-sized British boss sounds vaguely dirty to me--like a pocket Venus with a sweater--I mean, jumper--on). Heh.

[lobstermobster]

I'm gonna look like grapes?!?



:eek:




(and the pocket-sized British boss sounds vaguely dirty to me--like a pocket Venus with a sweater--I mean, jumper--on). Heh.


Here you go, bitch!
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2130/1640023016_4e67e91ed0_o.jpg

[Waverly]

Here you go, bitch!
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2130/1640023016_4e67e91ed0_o.jpgWhy is there a severed head in the wastebasket? Does this library have really strict late return policies?

[Hostile Dialect]

I think the trash can is a severed head.

[lobstermobster]

I think the trash can is a severed head.

fools!

[Southern Yankee]

I think the better question is why the lonely people??

[Southern Yankee]

Where do they all belong?

[Giraffe]

I think the trash can is a severed head.Did you not see the distorted perspective on the cylinder or note the fact that the smiley face does not curve around with the can but is instead superposed on top? Clearly, lobstermobster is toying with our preconceived notions of space and opacity which still making a commentary on the decreasing level of intellectualism in our generation's public libraries. Also at play is the integration of the cross with the door, a statement against the increasing role of religion in public life. Perhaps most striking, though, is the fact that the protagonist appears happy, but is counterpointed with legions of lonely people, who undoubtably represent the overall hostility and isolation that such volatile influences like religion and politics have on us as a society, ultimately alienating from each other and indeed ourselves.

Also, she misspelled "library".

[lobstermobster]

Did you not see the distorted perspective on the cylinder or note the fact that the smiley face does not curve around with the can but is instead superposed on top? Clearly, lobstermobster is toying with our preconceived notions of space and opacity which still making a commentary on the decreasing level of intellectualism in our generation's public libraries. Also at play is the integration of the cross with the door, a statement against the increasing role of religion in public life. Perhaps most striking, though, is the fact that the protagonist appears happy, but is counterpointed with legions of lonely people, who undoubtably represent the overall hostility and isolation that such volatile influences like religion and politics have on us as a society, ultimately alienating from each other and indeed ourselves.

Also, she misspelled "library".

no I didn't. Its liberry

[Frank]

Also, she misspelled "library".
I bet nobody ever asked Grandma Moses if she could spell "library". Elitist.

[Giraffe]

no I didn't. Its liberryAnd now a wry commentary on the malleability of language in a post-Internet world! It's a rare artist who can move so fluidly between media. I salute you.

[Chefguy]

The OP reminds me of any one of a hundred nights I spent in Joe's Bar on Back Street in St. Thomas back in the 70s: Hairspray Tom, Gar, Jackie the Bunny, Nicki, BJ the dynamiter, Moira, Margie Creque (aka Psycho Bitch), LD and Francis to name a few. What a collection of misfits, and what weird and wonderful nights. I wrote about it with the idea of submitting it somewhere, then realized it sounded almost exactly like a book I had read, but can't remember the author or the name of the book; except mine was from actual experience and the book was fiction.

[Troy McClure SF]

Fucking Yelpers.

What the hell is Margtown?

[levdrakon]

This whole thread is a whoosh, right? Or a big troll post? Why is it in the pit?

Because if not whoosh or troll, I can safely say I hate the OP and her stupid attempt at art.

There, now you can say you've been two places where people feel free to say they hate you.

[lobstermobster]

This whole thread is a whoosh, right? Or a big troll post? Why is it in the pit?

Because if not whoosh or troll, I can safely say I hate the OP and her stupid attempt at art.

There, now you can say you've been two places where people feel free to say they hate you.

yayyyy! I feel like this is a SDMB rite of passage!

p.s. where is Eleanor Riggles? I need her thoughts

[Omegaman]

I can safely say I hate the OP and her stupid attempt at art.


That's just what they said about VanGogh.

[lobstermobster]

Fucking Yelpers.

What the hell is Margtown?


margtown is just anywhere that sells margaritas. the bar was the Cinch. was in russian hill and just wandered in like i said.

[Waverly]

Did you not see the distorted perspective on the cylinder or note the fact that the smiley face does not curve around with the can but is instead superposed on top?Ok, if your on such a freakin' roll, Warhol, explain the hat that is a cross between a Navy Bellcap, nurse's cap, and bishop's mitre.

[Giraffe]

Ok, if your on such a freakin' roll, Warhol, explain the hat that is a cross between a Navy Bellcap, nurse's cap, and bishop's mitre.Don't overanalyze things. I think it's just a hat.

[eleanorigby]

I'm here! Sorry, I had Life to attend to for awhile.

I like my portrait very much. But like all great art, it is open to interpretation. I can appreciate Giraffe's take on it, but he neglected to mention that the face/wastebasket is really MY face, in a JAR, by the DOOR. I explain this to those holloi-polloi whose tiny minds cannot comprehend the Greatness before them. Philistines!


The mis-spelling of library is key to understanding the rich subtext present in the schemata-it is a deliberate mechanism, used to help us identify with the lonely people in the background. The traditional nurse's cap, symbol of male tyranny (and a vector for germs) is a master stroke-and for the subject to be moving from one female dominated field to another-what a social commentary THAT is. The lonely, sad peoples in the background--they are the simple folk to whom eleanorigby(that's me) has been an angel of mercy, and now she will continue that role, guiding their simple minds to proper and righteous reading material. Such is her burden in life, but lo! her task is made lighter by the book she is reading.


It's a wonderful snapshot of life, love and libraries by our own lobstermobster--somebody call the Met. This one needs some wall space!





(thanks, LM--I love my portrait!)

[Hostile Dialect]

MY face, in a JAR, by the DOOR

:smack:

If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go bang my head against a wall for a few hours. And all the lonely people of indiscriminate origin! Agh! How did I not get it?

:smack: :smack: :smack:

[eleanorigby]

:smack:

If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go bang my head against a wall for a few hours. And all the lonely people of indiscriminate origin! Agh! How did I not get it?

:smack: :smack: :smack:


Ignorance fought. You may rise now and stop self-flagellating(unless you're enjoying it).

[Hostile Dialect]

Ignorance fought. You may rise now and stop self-flagellating(unless you're enjoying it).

Funny enough, my nickname in high school was Reverend Dimmesdale, or simply The Reverend.

Not for any enjoyment I received from self-flagellation, mind you.

[eleanorigby]

Funny enough, my nickname in high school was Reverend Dimmesdale, or simply The Reverend.

Not for any enjoyment I received from self-flagellation, mind you.

We could change it to Father MacKenzie.....

[lobstermobster]

i want that guy to come back and tell me about why he thinks i'm a troll

[levdrakon]

i want that guy to come back and tell me about why he thinks i'm a trollMe?

[dropzone]

No, I think he's of the opinion that you lost your way going to MPSIMS.

I wonder what the weather is like over there. I stopped going because people's family members kept dying. Here in the Pit we just WISH they'd die.

[bbs2k]

People just like to say the word troll in the Pit.

(troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll troll)

When really, they've just given up on humor.

Oh, and lobstermobster, only a troll would have this capitalization quirk like you do.

(troll troll troll)

[bbs2k]

...






(troll troll troll)

[Hostile Dialect]

...






(troll troll troll)

Troll!

[lobstermobster]

You guys are rude! No its in the PIT because I was a victim of reverse snobbery.

[levdrakon]

When really, they've just given up on humor.Hate to poop on your pop-tart, but calling someone a "Trans-asaurus Rex" isn't really all that funny. If you're going for humor, know your audience.

Is the BBQ Pit forum the ambiguously humorous forum now? Not to junior mod or anything, but two mods playing along with a humor thread in the Pit when it's not April 1st confuses me. What's next, cat picture threads in the Pit?

I thought we were supposed to trash the hell out of each other here.

Go ahead, trash me, you fucking trolls.

[bbs2k]

Well I thought it was funny.

And does that mean I now hold in my hand a poop-tart?

[EddyTeddyFreddy]

Troll, troll, troll your posts
Venting down the thread
Swearily swearily swearliy swearily
Pit that sucker dead.

[Miller]

Hate to poop on your pop-tart, but calling someone a "Trans-asaurus Rex" isn't really all that funny.

I laughed. I can't defend it, you know... politically, but I still laughed.

[levdrakon]

I laughed. I can't defend it, you know... politically, but I still laughed.I could laugh in the right context and maybe I am being a bit humor impaired tonight but there's some nuance here I'm not getting. Whoosh, trolling, don't know. Am I supposed to take the OP seriously? Hook up with your buddies, hit a gay bar, get drunk, talk too loud, fall off chairs, get told by the natives you kinda suck then get indignant about it? Like being an obnoxious drunk is like, totally normal how dare you judge me 'cause that's like totally reverse discrimination? Or something?

I'm thinking maybe I forgot to take my "gets the joke" pill this morning, so maybe someone help me out here.

[dropzone]

Nah, ya just forgot your "don't be a jerk, regardless of the forum" pill. No biggie.

[Waverly]

I'm thinking maybe I forgot to take my "gets the joke" pill this morning, so maybe someone help me out here.Lighten up, Francis. You’ve never been twenty-something?

If you had read the thread rather than just looked for political incorrect phrases to take offense at, you’d probably have come away with the impression that she was completely comfortable in the company of the aging transvestite. She’s mocking him/her because of his/her bad attitude, not sexuality. The phrase is non PC. Oh well.

And yeah, I believe the story. When just a wee bit younger, one my favorite bars was a lesbian hang out. It just was just different and had a cool atmosphere. I just had to be willingly to laugh of the occasional, “Outta my way, sausage!”

[lobstermobster]

The guy who was really more of a problem was the cult recruiter guy. Later my boyfriend was like "I actually can totally understand how people get sucked into those kinds of things. He made me feel like I was the only person in the room" A little disconcerting to hear but it worked out in the end. What the fuck is that not part of God business?

Does Lev think I made the story up? We walked into this bar off the street and didn't even know it was a gay bar until like two hours later. We didn't go into it being like "oh this is a silly fruit bar lets go in and be assholes because these people's opinions of us don't matter" I was just shocked at the audacity at this persons willingness to SCOLD me like a child not for talking loud as much as not including her in the conversation which would be a valid point if I KNEW WHO THE FUCK SHE WAS. Does anyone go out of their way to include total strangers in their conversations?

When my friend fell to his credit his stool had one shorter wobbly leg AND I tried to buy everyone on the patio a beer when he fell and broke shit.

I have verbal diarrhea. I talk about the most horrible things out in public. I'll go on and on about a grizzly murder I'm reading about, the gory things that happen where I work, and whatever else comes to my head. I'm used to offending someone every time I walk outside my door. I don't usually understand why but it happens. I pay for my drinks, I tip generously, and while I may be a loud talker at least I'm not one of those screaming squealing girls that run through bars hugging people they know. "I LOVE THIS SONG!!!!!!" So until being a 23 year old highly extroverted overstimulated easily excitable loud talking asshole becomes illegal, I will stay the course (and then draw it)

[Nzinga, Seated]

Wanna change my nick now!


Signed,

Angry, with broom.


Comma-yes or no?

Comma....definitely with the comma.

The story and drawing made me smile. Nice.

[eleanorigby]

Lobby, mobby (may I call you that? No? ok)--


You don't understand. You're fairly new here. Levdrakon is sort of like Oscar the Grouch--the propensity to be an attention whore(or is a junior mod?), but only for negative attention. He polices the Pit for only Pit-appropriate stuff; nevermind that he is not the arbiter of such things. He likes to be pissed off, grumpy and out of sorts. Me, I think he's suffering from chronic constipation. The best thing to do for him is to ignore him--that allows him to be pissed off, grumpy and even more out of sorts--and probably more constipated. Consider it an act of charity.



and keep on drawing. Hell, I'd draw levdrakon at this point. ;)

[levdrakon]

Lobby, mobby (may I call you that? No? ok)--


You don't understand. You're fairly new here. Levdrakon is sort of like Oscar the Grouch--the propensity to be an attention whore(or is a junior mod?), but only for negative attention. He polices the Pit for only Pit-appropriate stuff; nevermind that he is not the arbiter of such things. He likes to be pissed off, grumpy and out of sorts. Me, I think he's suffering from chronic constipation. The best thing to do for him is to ignore him--that allows him to be pissed off, grumpy and even more out of sorts--and probably more constipated. Consider it an act of charity.



and keep on drawing. Hell, I'd draw levdrakon at this point. ;)Now, that's more like it!

But no, don't draw me. I'd feel like a sell-out.

[levdrakon]

Hell, I'd draw levdrakon at this point. ;)Okay, I'm bored. (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v62/Levdrakon/stupid.png)

[eleanorigby]

Okay, I'm bored. (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v62/Levdrakon/stupid.png)


You're female?


Why are you birthing a bowling ball and naming it after me? Should we explore this issue in greater depth? Do bowling balls have some greater significance to you? Do you fear bowling balls? Do you fear birth? Balls? Me? Do you have an unnatural attraction to bowling balls or dinosaurs or me?

The rendition of me as a dinosaur-headed human is quite good, actually. However, I would like to point out that I am actually ornithiscian, not saurishician. Please make a note of it.

[levdrakon]

You're female?I'm Ultragendered, and I'll thank you to keep that in mind in our future interactions.

[eleanorigby]

I'm Ultragendered, and I'll thank you to keep that in mind in our future interactions.


LOTS to talk about in our future sessions, I see. <insert periodicals joke here>

[NinetyWt]

nope you can be sexiled at any point in your life. Geez ... I was thinking marriage took care of that ........... (looks at Hubby suspiciously...........)

[Rubystreak]

I'll go on and on about a grizzly murder I'm reading about,

Then can you please tell me, who is brutally slaying the bears? My money's on Stephen Colbert.

[Chefguy]

Then can you please tell me, who is brutally slaying the bears? My money's on Stephen Colbert.


I'll give a nod to your spelling catch, since it's probably too oblique for many, sort of like my catch of "yacht's down" in another thread.

[eleanorigby]

Maybe it's a grisly grizzly murder? Or Colbert finally killed Papa Bear?

:confused:

:)


(completely irrelevant aside: I like posting smileys in the Pit. Hee.)

[lobstermobster]

Maybe it's a grisly grizzly murder? Or Colbert finally killed Papa Bear?

:confused:

:)


(completely irrelevant aside: I like posting smileys in the Pit. Hee.)

whoa whoa whoa. didn't notice that

[eleanorigby]

What? The misspelling or my use of emoticons in the Pit?

As an artist, can you give us some insight into levdrakon's work? Myself, I think it's derivative. You?

[Rubystreak]

whoa whoa whoa. didn't notice that

So you haven't heard about the grizzly murders? They're un bear able.

:D

I'll be here all week. Don't forget to tip your waitress.

[Hostile Dialect]

don't draw me

Too late. (http://www.flickr.com/photos/7385869@N08/1679729703/)

[eleanorigby]

I dunno. He's outlook seems kind of dark, no?


Impressive sword, though.

[levdrakon]

Impressive sword, though.Yeah, I hear that a lot. ;)

[eleanorigby]

Yeah, I hear that a lot. ;)


Doubly so, since you're "ultra gendered" (what exactly does that mean? Are you a hermaphrodite?)