ThxGiving Football picks (for the sports impaired)

[askeptic]

I don't watch sports. Know nothing about college ball. Friends coming over for the holiday. What teams are playing and who should I root for to look like I know something about the sport? A few bits of trivia I could let drop might be nice as well. This is all in fun, my friends know that I don't watch sports and will wonder how I got the info. Nobody will be fooled into thinking I got the info legitimately.

[jackelope]

Thanksgiving games:

Green Bay Packers at Detroit Lions, 12:30 ET. Green Bay should run away with this one.

New York Jets at Dallas Cowboys, 4:15 ET. Dallas should run away with this one.

Indianapolis Colts at Atlanta Falcons, 8:15 ET. I hate to say it because I'm a Falcons fan, but there's not a chance in hell of Atlanta winning this game.

[Gangster Octopus]

Here are some one-liners for ya:

Packers-Lions:
"Isn't funny how some folks thought Brett Favre (pronounced like "Carve", trust me) shoudl retire. He's having his best year."

Cowboys-Jets:
"I always thought Romo would be good quarterback in the NFL when I saw him playing at Eatern Illinois."

Falcons-Colts:
"Honestly, I don't htink the Falcons would be that good even if they had Vick. I always kind of thought he was overrated."

[Tapioca Dextrin]

Texas vs. A&M is the biggest game of the year for A&M. For UT fans it's just another fixture. Don't mention the bonfire.

[some white dude]

Detroit's Quarterback, Jon Kitna, predicted in the preseason that the Lions would win at least ten games this year. That would have been a huge surprise to many football fans, as the Lions have sucked pretty hard for a few years. You could mention that, considering their remaining schedule, it doesn't look like Detroit is gonna reach that mark.

You could always pick a certain player to root for, and then say you've got him on your fantasy team. Be sure not to pick anyone too obvious, like Peyton Manning. I say to go with Indianapolis running back Joseph Addai (pronounced "uh-DIE").

[Oslo Ostragoth]

Here are some one-liners for ya:

Packers-Lions:
"Isn't it funny how some folks thought Brett Favre (pronounced like "Carve", trust me) should retire. He's having his best year."

Cowboys-Jets:
"I always thought Romo would be a good quarterback in the NFL when I saw him playing at Eastern Illinois."

Falcons-Colts:
"Honestly, I don't think the Falcons would be that good even if they had Vick. I always kind of thought he was overrated."Excellent. Use these.

Fixed your spelling and grammar, GO. No need to thank me, just get back in The Game.

[askeptic]

Thanks everybody!

[divemaster]

LSU / Arkansas on Friday afternnon. Potential Heisman winner (Arkansas running back Darren McFadden) vs. a very very good run defense and the #1 ranked college team.

[dalej42]

ASU vs USC in college ball on Thursday night.

How did USC lose to Stanford?
If ASU beats USC and the beats Arizona (who beat Oregon), should ASU go to the National Championship game?

[Trunk]

A few more. . .

"Favre never looked this good when he was playing for the Dolphins. Complete switcheroo."

"Dallas really needed a guy like T.O. to stabilize their locker room."

"It's nice to see Indy finally producing on offense this year, especially after years of watching their defense bail those clowns out."

[Least Original User Name Ever]

"You know, Favre should probably retire pretty soon. It's not unheard of to retire at the top of your game. Granted, the last two to do it were Barry Sanders (running back for the Detroit Lions) and Robert Smith (running back for the Minnesota Vikings) and that was a few years ago. I think Favre's replacement in the moxie department is going to be Tony Romo. He seems to have that gunslinger mentality that got Favre so famous."


That's also got some buzwords so your friends will really want to know what's going on.

[Skammer]

A few more. . .

"Favre never looked this good when he was playing for the Dolphins. Complete switcheroo."

"Dallas really needed a guy like T.O. to stabilize their locker room."

"It's nice to see Indy finally producing on offense this year, especially after years of watching their defense bail those clowns out." You're mean.

[brewha]

I didn't want to be the spoilsport, but since it's already been spoiled, advice in any post but trunk's would make you look like you have a pretty good understanding of da fooseball.

And you can actually refer to footbal as "da fooseball" if done so with a nawlins accent and if you're friends have ever seen "The Waterboy".

[FlightlessBird]

How about some Thanksgiving Football History (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thanksgiving_Classic) :
The Lions have hosted a game each year since 1934 (excluding the years 1939-1944 due to World War II), and the Cowboys have hosted a game each year since 1966 (excluding 1975 and 1977 when the St. Louis Cardinals hosted a game instead).andbeginning in 2006 season, the NFL Network also hosts one Thanksgiving game per season between two different teams chosen by the league.(Last year the 3rd game was between: Denver Broncos(10) @ Kansas City Chiefs(19).
And lastly:
The current active franchises that have never played on Thanksgiving through 2007 include:

* Baltimore Ravens
* Carolina Panthers
* Cincinnati Bengals
* Houston Texans
* Jacksonville Jaguars
* New Orleans Saints

[Bearflag70]

A few more. . .

"Favre never looked this good when he was playing for the Dolphins. Complete switcheroo."

"Dallas really needed a guy like T.O. to stabilize their locker room."

"It's nice to see Indy finally producing on offense this year, especially after years of watching their defense bail those clowns out."

Looks like Trunk knows less about football than you do. ;)

Here is some stuff:

Green Bay Packers @ Detroit Lions
The Detroit Lions and Dallas Cowboys are the only 2 NFL teams that play EVERY Thanksgiving. Packer quarterback Brett Farve (pronounced "Farve") is a sure fire Hall of Fame quarterback. He is a Super Bowl champion from the 1990s. Just about everyone thought he would retire after last season. He didn't, and now he is having one of his best years ever. Thanks primarily to him, the Packers have 9 wins and only 1 loss, despite the fact that the rest of the Packer team is not really that great, but they are improving. This is their best start since the head coach Vince Lombardi era of the 1960's (when the Packers won the first two Super Bowls). The Super Bowl trophy is named the Lombardi Trophy after him.

The Detroit Lions have been one of the worst NFL teams historically. They have only won a couple of playoff games in the past 30 years or so. Over the past few years, their General Manager, Matt Millen, has been criticized for the poor performance. This year, they have managed to turn things around. Until last week (against the New York Giants), Detroit was undefeated at home games this season. However, they have been racking up wins against pretty weak teams, and the rest of their schedule is pretty tough. The Lions have 6 wins and 4 losses. Quarterback John Kitna predicted at the start of the season that the Lions would get 10 wins (out of 16 games). That means they will need 4 more wins out of the next 6 games. This is unlikely given their tougher schedule for the rest of the season.

The Giants beat the Lions last week at Detroit. The Packers beat the New York Giants earlier this year at New York. Thus, arguably, the Packers are better than the Giants and should also beat Detroit. Detroit is pretty vulnerable at the offensive line, and they have not been able to get their running backs to do well over the past couple of weeks.

New York Jets @ Dallas Cowboys
The Jets have been pretty bad this year. However, they stunned the Pittsburgh Steelers last week by beating them in an upset. The Steelers are considered a good team and were well favored to beat the Jets. Have the Jets figured out how to win, or was that win just a fluke game? We'll see.

The Cowboys are historically really good, with more Super Bowl appearances (8) than any other team. They are also tied with the Steelers and San Francisco 49ers for most Super Bowl wins (5). That's only one reason many people hate them. They were given the nickname "America's Team" back in the late 1970s. That's another reason people hate them... an air of conceit. There are more reasons, but Dallas is my favorite team, so I'll stop there.

The Cowboys won their last Super Bowl in 1995, then went downhill. They cycled through a few inept head coaches, then hired no-nonsense Bill "Tuna" Parcells, who turned the team around over the past 4 years. Now they have good talent, but Parcells retired, and they hired head coach Wade Phillips. This is Phillips' first season with Dallas, and they have 9 wins and only 1 loss this year.

Dallas quarterback Tony Romo has been with the team for a few years, but was never the starter. The team struggled last year, but then decided to start Romo mid-season. He has proven to be a surprisingly good quarterback and has some of the best stats in the NFL, especially for being so new as a starter.

The Cowboys' main weakness is their trouble defending against the pass. They also get off to slow starts, often mediocre in the 1st half of each game, but red hot in the 2nd half. Look for the Jets to pass a lot and maybe even get an early lead that Dallas will likely overcome. If Dallas is ahead at halftime, chances are, they will stay ahead for the rest of the game and even widen the lead.

Dallas is a very good team overall and is considered one of the top teams (along with the Packers) to go to the Super Bowl this season to face the New England Patriots as the likely opponent. The Patriots look unstoppable and are predicted to clobber whomever they may face in the Super Bowl. They already clobbered Dallas earlier this year, in Dallas. The Packers have been more of a one-man show (with Farve being "the man"), but the Packers are improving as a team, so the showdown between Dallas and the Packers next week should be a fun one.

Indianapolis Colts @ Atlanta Falcons
The Colts are the current defending Super Bowl champs, having beaten the Chicago Bears. They are are very good team this year, but are currently plagued with injuries to key players. They are noticeably weaker as a result, having almost lost to the so-so Kansas City Chiefs last week, at Indianapolis. Their start quarterback, Peyton Manning, is healthy though.

However, the Falcons are pretty bad, considered one of the worst teams this year. Their star quarterback, Michael Vick, is now in jail for illegal dog fighting.

Despite the injuries, the Colts should beat the Falcons.

[Ellis Dee]

I didn't want to be the spoilsport, but since it's already been spoiled, advice in any post but trunk's would make you look like you have a pretty good understandingNot just Trunk's; LOUNE's post is a parody as well.

Something that may be worth mentioning is that the Cowboys are currently leading (and will likely win) the best division in football, the NFC East:

#1 NFC East 18-6 (75%)
#2 AFC South 19-7 (73%)
#3 NFC North 16-10 (62%)
#4 AFC North 11-11 (50%)
#5 NFC South 10-16 (38.4%)
#6 AFC East 9-15 (37.5%)
#7 AFC West 10-18 (36%)
#8 NFC West 7-17 (29%)

Even more interesting is that right now, the NFC is the better conference:

#1 NFC 23-21 (52%)
#2 AFC 21-23 (48%)

[Ellis Dee]

The Cowboys' main weakness is their trouble defending against the pass. They also get off to slow starts, often mediocre in the 1st half of each game, but red hot in the 2nd half. Look for the Jets to pass a lot and maybe even get an early lead that Dallas will likely overcome. If Dallas is ahead at halftime, chances are, they will stay ahead for the rest of the game and even widen the lead. Adding to this pattern, the Jets have gotten out to double-digit leads by halftime multiple times this season and then squandered away that lead in the second half each time.the showdown between Dallas and the Packers next week should be a fun one.I wish I could see it, but like 70+% of the country I don't get NFL Network.

[Von_Erich]

the showdown between Dallas and the Packers next week should be a fun one.I wish I could see it, but like 70+% of the country I don't get NFL Network.

The game comes on at 3:15 here, so I have to think of an excuse to leave work early.

[Trunk]

LOUNE's post is a parody as well.
How so?

[Diogenes the Cynic]

askeptic, I think it would be helpful if you could tell us what your general location is. We would be able to help you put a regional spin on things and express the correct opinions about certain players or teams (like whether you should love the Cowboys or hate them, whether you should want Favre to pull a hammy, etc.).

[Least Original User Name Ever]

How so?


Good question.

[Enginerd]

Favre is long passed "the top of his game." Sanders was 30 when he retired; Smith was 28. Favre just turned 38. He's having a great year, but the top of his game was the mid to late 90's, and he's not going to match that period again.

If you're looking for an anaolog to Favre, you want to talk about "going out on top" and cite John Elway (who retired at age 38 after two consecutive Super Bowl victories), not guys who retired when they were 10 years younger than he is now.

[Least Original User Name Ever]

I'd look at his stats if I were you. His rating now is the second highest of his entire career. His passing percentage has never been higher and he's also matching his career high for yards per attempt.




He's having a pretty damned good year, especially compared to the past few turnover-plagued ones.

[Enginerd]

Sure, he's having a great year, but it's the comparison to Smith and Sanders that trips you up. Sanders retired in his prime without ever having a down year. Smith retired suddenly after the best season of his pro career. Neither of them hung around into their mid 30s and had the kinds of seasons that Favre had over the last two years. There's no comparison between either of those guys and Favre.

[askeptic]

askeptic, I think it would be helpful if you could tell us what your general location is.

I'm in northern California. Thanks for all the advice guys and gals. Why do I get the feeling Trunk is pulling my leg?

[aerodave]

If it's college ball you're worried about, recognize the huge implications of this weekend's games for the national title race. Only the top two teams at the end of the regular season (end of the month) get to play in the national championship game...but there are about 5 teams who all have a shot. It all depends on who can win their remaining games and who ends up knocking themselves out of the race. Every weekend in college football is critical for the top teams, but this next couple of weekends could be far wilder than the end of most seasons.

LSU is #1 and must win their last two games to stay in the running for the national title race. They face a potentially tough opponent in Arkansas on Friday. After that, they play in their conference championship game, which means they should have another tough game.

Kansas is currently #2, and Missouri is #4. They play each other on Saturday, and the winner will have just one game (the conference championship) standing between them and a spot in the national championship game.

There are a couple teams just chomping at the bit for any or all of the above teams to screw up. West Virginia (#3) only needs LSU to lose once more, or the winner of the Kansas/Missouri game to lose the following week. If either of those things happen, and WVU wins their last two games, they will play for a national title.

Similarly, Ohio State (#5) still has a shot to play for the big prize, but they realistically need losses from at least three of above teams to move into the top two spots.

Confused? If so, don't sweat it too much. Just recognize that there are still a few teams with real hopes of playing for and winning a national championship. To that end, three of this weekend's games have major national implications. Those big games are LSU/Arkansas, Kansas/Mizzou, and West Virginia/Connecticut. Try to sort out this mess, and you'll sound super smart.

ETA: I'm a West Virginia fan, so go Razorbacks...go Big 12 South champ next week, and most importantly, LET'S GOOOO MOUNTAINEERS!

[Lamar Mundane]

"Tony Romo is totally nailing that American Idol chick..."

[Least Original User Name Ever]

Sure, he's having a great year, but it's the comparison to Smith and Sanders that trips you up. Sanders retired in his prime without ever having a down year. Smith retired suddenly after the best season of his pro career. Neither of them hung around into their mid 30s and had the kinds of seasons that Favre had over the last two years. There's no comparison between either of those guys and Favre.

Never factored age into it.

[Diogenes the Cynic]

I'm in northern California. Thanks for all the advice guys and gals. Why do I get the feeling Trunk is pulling my leg?
Ok, so you're probably around Charger fans and/or Bay area (Raiders/Niners) fans and possibly some Seahawks fans. None of those teams factor much into divisional or regional rivalries tomorrow, so you're pretty much safe on those grounds. Cowboys hatred is generally pretty universal, so it's probably pretty safe to say that you want them to get upset by the Jets. During the Packers/Lions game, say that you wish the announcers would quit blowing Favre for 5 minutes (don't worry that they won't do that. They will). You will also be able to repeat that lament during the Indy game, only they'll be blowing Peyton Manning this time.

Other random stuff trivia that might help:

Terrell Owens, wide receiver for he Cowboys (refer to him casually as "T.O.") is generally reagrded as a jackass and a locker room cancer. He is also notorious for elaborate touchdown celebrations. I kind of like the guy but you can take either tact. Say you wish he'd fall on his face or say you kind of dig him (it's ok to take a view which is contrary to the norm as long as you let it be known that you KNOW it's contrary to the norm).

Brett Favre has never missed a start in his entire career at Green Bay. It's an NFL record comparable (actually more impressive, IMO) to cal Ripken's streak in baseball.

The Lions have been horrible forever. This is their first respectable season since the Barry Sanders days. They have a great receiving corps. Rookie, Calvin Johnson was a very high draft touted as another Randy Moss. He hasn't had that kind of year (Moss was ROY in his first season), but that's partially due to injury. He's worth keeping an eye on.

The Lions' quarterback, Jon Kitna, is a religious nut who said eariler this year that Jesus healed him from a concussion. If he takes a big hit, you can make a crack about faith healing.

Indy won the Superbowl last year (just in case you didn't know). Peyton Manning is a really, really good quarterback. Indy's coach, Tony Dungy, is one of the best liked and most respected coaches in the game. He was also the first black coach to win a Superbowl.

The AFC is much better than the NFC right now. Indy and the Patriots are the two best teams in the league and it's generally assumed that whichever one of those teams wins the AFC (probably the Pats) will win the Superbowl. Dallas and Green Bay are, at present, the odds on favorites to meet in the NFC championship but it's also pertty much assumed that whichever team makes it to the Superbowl will get clobbered by the AFC team (especially if it's the Pats).

[Ellis Dee]

Sorry, I was confusing Robert Smith with Robert Edwards, that running back (for the Patriots) who shattered his leg in a pick-up beach game at the pro-bowl, which is why I thought LOUNE's post was a parody. Also, Barry didn't leave "at the top of his game", Tiki Barber did. Barry left "disgruntled with management." There's a big difference. Mainly it was that Barry wanted to keep playing but didn't, which makes comparing him to Favre inappropriate.

I also agree with Enginerd's reasoning. Favre's career graph looks roughly like this: __
/ \__ ?
/ \__ |
/ \__ |
/ \__|
/I mean, people have been calling for his retirement for three years now. Since he didn't retire before the long decline, he can't be said to have retired at the top of his game regardless of the details surrounding his retirement.

[Ellis Dee]

The AFC is much better than the NFC right now.This isn't as true as it used to be; the NFC currently has a winning record against the AFC. And while I agree that the Patriots are pretty much a shoe-in for winning it all this year, if you objectively rank the teams from first to worst, both the Cowboys and Packers would almost certainly be ranked ahead of any AFC team outside of Boston. Both would beat the snot out of the Colts -- who are basically the equivalent of the Giants -- and judging by that Jets game both could fairly easily beat the Steelers. The Jags would be tough, but I can't see them beating the Cowboys even once out of 10 tries. They could take a few from the Packers, but I think Green Bay is a better team. I know I'd take Favre over Garrard in a heartbeat.

Various power rankings demonstrate my point:

CBS Sportsline (http://cbs.sportsline.com/nfl/powerrankings)

1. Patriots
2. Packers
3. Cowboys
4. Colts
5. Giants
6. Jaguars

ESPN (http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/powerranking)

1. Patriots
2. Cowboys
3. Packers
4. Colts
5. Jaguars
6. Giants

FOX Sports (http://msn.foxsports.com/nfl/powerRankings)

1. Patriots
2. Cowboys
3. Packers
4. Colts
5. Steelers
6. Giants

[askeptic]

The funny thing is, two of the guys coming over who are always going on about football, went to Vegas several months ago and put $1000 on the Niners to go to the Superbowl. Whenever they tease me about not following football I remind them of that brilliant bit of prognostication.

[Bearflag70]

So, how did it go?

[askeptic]

So, how did it go?

It went great. Everybody thought I was pretty up on the sport until my wife spilled the beans. OH well , still in a turkey haze. I thought I would get a rest today but first thing this morning I found myself throwing out pumpkins and indian corn and then hauling christmas lights out and hanging them. My wife is a holiday nut.