Things NOT to do at a hotel.

[Markxxx]

For those of you who travel, make it easy on yourself.

First of all, when you check in know what name the reservation is under. There are people behind you waiting to get to their rooms.

Since keys (or key cards) no longer have room numbers on them, if you foget what room you are in just ask the front desk. This happens all the time, don't be embarrassed and start trying doors at random. Then we get complaints at the front desk that people are trying to break into your room.

For hotels which have movies, we don't care what movie (usually the dirty ones) you watch. We have better things to do with our lives.

Don't eat out of the honor bar unless you want to pay $5.00 for a Snickers.

Know the last name of the guest when you call. We cannot give out any room numbers or personal info.
I don't care if you are the guest's mother. It is for saftey reasons.

And finally decided what time you want to wake up BEFORE calling for the wake up call. Nothing is more irritating then having 10 calls in que and the operator asking "what time sir?" and you say "well let me think..."

[manhattan]

Markxxx: Thanks for the kind words on the AOL thread.

You might enjoy this: Your Guide to Tipping a Bellman (http://www.primenet.com/~dmoritz/bellman.htm)


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Livin' on Tums, Vitamin E and Rogaine

[Polycarp]

Don't invite Brad Pitt or any member of Guns 'n' Roses to a room party. :o

[ChiefScott]

To begin with, it's queue.
Secondly, don't lick the sheets either -- 'specially the crispy parts.
Thirdly, cash you bastard. Cash, for tips.

[Bluepony]

Most hotel managements frown on livestock, small-engine repair, and indoor roller hockey. Uh....that's what I hear, anyway.

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"...send lawyers, guns, and money..."

Warren Zevon

[Doobieous]

Oh and never ever set your bed on fire. I noticed the staff does'nt appreciate it.

Avoid inviting all the hookers over for milk & cookies. The management gets no cuts from milk & cookies parties.

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We have met the enemy, and He is Us.--Walt Kelly

[TVeblen]

Uh, is it okay to swipe those itty-bitty bottles of shampoo you don't use up?

Miss Manners says that's a major no-no. I can buy the sample sizes in the local drug store, but hey, if a perfectly good hotel already (sorta) endorsed it...why fry my hair with a bad mini-bottle of Jungle Rape shampoo from Walgreens just to stock my travel kit?

Cheap, and probably tacky,
Veb

(P.S. But I NEVER fail to tip the maid, and well. Good folks, doing good work. Hey, you think I change sheets and towels every day?!?)

[Bluepony]

TV---

Go for it, beats buying the same thing at Wal Mart. Miss Manners thinks it's tacky to eat oysters with a Swiss Army knife or combine a wedding reception with a deep-sea fishing trip. But what the hell does she know? People like that are so freakin' anal. In my perfect world, Miss Manners and Martha Stewart are first on the list for my "Special Re-Education Camps"


------------------
"...send lawyers, guns, and money..."

Warren Zevon

[BoBettie]

TV-
I don't have a Walgreens around here..any ideas on where else I might procure a bottle of "jungle rape shampoo"? ;)

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I'm very lucky. The only time I was ever up shit creek, I just happened to have a paddle with me.
--George Carlin

[Girl Next Door]

[QUOTE]You might enjoy this: Your Guide to Tipping a Bellman[QUOTE]

Whoever wrote this web page is a world class shmuck. I would never even want to stay at that hotel if that guy worked there.

[BurnMeUp]

Never take the complimentary sewing kit and sew the sheets to the drapes.

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Just add water, it makes it's own sauce!

[Satan]

BurnMeUp - George Carlin used that line.

"Let 'em know you've been there!!"

------------------
Yer pal,
Satan

[beefymeg]

Hey, what's up with maid-tipping? I've now encountered 2 people in the last week who were VERY adamant about it. I overtip waitresses and hairdressers - do I really have to tip the hotel maids?

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Where are we going?
And why am I in this handbasket?

[manhattan]

Yep. http://www.tipping.org/tipping/tipping.html

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Livin' on Tums, Vitamin E and Rogaine

[manhattan]

Dammit!

Yep.
http://www.tipping.org/tipping/tipping.html

[Harmonious Discord]

Maid tipping. Is that like cow tipping? I've seen many a maid that could pass as a cow.

[DrFidelius]

Milkmaids?

[Lucky]

I rarely tip the maid at a hotel. I'm paying $200 a night for a frickin' bed and some towels---I feel no obligation to leave extra money. If the hotel isn't paying her enough, that's her problem. I tip the bellhop, because he provides and extra service for me, namely, carrying my bags up. I will also tip the concierge (sp?) if he/she gets special tickets for me or some such thing that is extra. But changing the sheets? At $200 a night the least I expect is clean sheets and towels. I don't see this as a service that warrents a tip.

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"I think it would be a great idea" Mohandas Ghandi's answer when asked what he thought of Western civilization

[Melatonin]

Newsflash: The *only* people working in your $200 a night hotel who get paid less than the housekeepers (presuming the housekeeper is making a few cents more than minimum wage) are the people who work in the laundry room. Believe it or not, changing the sheets when you stay more than one day in a row is *not* protocol in every hotel. Nor is ensuring that you have the proper number of hand towels or mini soaps for the particular number of guests in your room.

Housekeepers are universally paid poorly because housekeeping is a job that requires niether documented skills nor references. All that you need to get a housekeeping job is a uterus. Just because its the only job someone can get, doesn't magically make them able to live on 5.15 an hour.

Don't kid yourself about whether these folks are providing a service. When the amount of garbage your maid has to carry out exceeds the volumne of the trash can by three measures, or when the family of 5 strip all of their linens and towels and dump them in the tub of running water, when you leave for the day, leaving a bathroom covered in pubic hairs and come back to a nice clean room, someone has provided you a service, love.

Essentially, someone is cleaning up your spooge and NOT stealing your stuff. Kind of like mom. But your mother does not work here.
So set aside your gumball-machine change and tip your housekeeper, cheap bastards.

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Life is short. Make fun of it.

[BoBettie]

For the record, I'm a maid tipper.
When I was in NYC at a conference (I was going to be there for a week), I realized I forgot my shampoo. Well, I have mid-back length hair and the little bottle in the room wasn't enough. I ran into the maid doing my room the next day and explained the problem. (half in english and half in broken spanish). The next day I had extra towels (I could have taken a shower every hour and still had some left over for the pool!), extra hand lotion, and 12 bottles of shampoo. 12. Even though I only used 2, the next day- she left 12 more. I'm guessing this is because I left her a $5.00 tip the first day. She was great, and I left $5.00 a day plus $10 on my last day.
(Probobly seems like a lot, but it WAS NYC, so I figured it was right- plus I got reimbursed from the company)

So be nice! Tip these people!!! It's not their fault they don't get paid shit!


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Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps.
Emo Philips (stolen from matt's webpage)

[andros]

Ummm, exsqueeze me? It's not their fault they don't get paid more? BFD. It sure isn't mine either.

Melatonin, you mentioned that housekeeping is a good job for the undocumented. So what? I didn't ask Lupita to move to the States. Why should I subsidize her more than I already am?

$5.15 an hour. . .sure it isn't much. But I bought a house on minimum wage. It can be done.

Yes, housekeepers, maids, etc., provide a service. No problem. So does the guy who sells me gasoline. I don't friggin tip him. At 60 bucks a night for a halfway decent hotel room, I shouldn't be obligated to bribe my maid service for better service.

Or is this just more UMC white noblesse oblige?

-andros-

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"Listen Children Eternal Father Eternally One!" Exceptions? None!
-Doc Bronner

[andros]

Ooops, sorry Mel. I didn't read your post clearly enough. You said "documented skills." Whatever that means, it sure doesn't imply undocumented alien. I apologize for putting words in your mouth. :)

-andros-

[manhattan]

Not for nothing, lucky and andros, but your maid cleans dozens of rooms each day. Just like you, me, and the rest of the universe, the housekeeper will do some of the assigned tasks perfectly, some quite well, and some, well, not quite so well. Aside from the traditional reasons to tip, you might wonder where on that scale you'd like your room to fall.

So open your wallet and part with a few Washingtons, cheapskates!

Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

And BTW, if the gas guy fills your tank (as opposed to sitting behind plexiglass taking money), tip him too.

------------------
Livin' on Tums, Vitamin E and Rogaine

[TVeblen]

Zette, you put your finger on it. It's not just gracious to tip maids, it's also practical.

Hey, the issue isn't *fault* that someone works a job that's low paid. Call me a reactionary poop (and hey, this is place for it!) but I was raised to believe that any honest work has dignity.

By tipping (as well as smiling, and saying a simple 'thank you') to people who usually get treated like dirt, you add to the rare positive vibes in this world. And, newsflash! people who are treated well reciprocate.

Shift mental gears: if you look at it as a gift you can give, rather than a scam to pounce on. Hey, if you can afford a $200 hotel room you can afford to be gracious to people.

It's pure Mark Twain: "I can live for weeks on a good compliment". Compliment people who usually are invisible, by respecting them and their work, and you'll be repaid a zillion times over. They'll feel good, you'll feel good---all for a few bucks?!

Veb

[ConMan]

Those people who don't tip just don't get it. If we do not have people who are willing to wait tables, clean hotel rooms, mow the yards and all of the other SERVICE related jobs - who is going to do it? If you can afford a $200/night room, I am sure you can spare at least a buck a day for a tip.

I was a hotel manager for 13 years. The stories I could tell you! Like the time Arnold Schwarzenegger slapped a woman across the bar! (she deserved it!) As for the bellman link, I would fire that guy in flash if he was my employee! Many of my hotels and employees were recognized (won awards) for their customer service. Housekeeping may not be a glamorous job but it is a crucial one! My hotels usually ran so smooth that I was was usually nothing more than a cheerleader - motivating my employees to keep up the good work. Regarding pay for housekeepers, they all do not make $5.15/hr. In parts of NC, unemployment is below 2%, so many make around $7 or more depending on how well they perform or how bad the manager wants to keep them and not have to go through the grind of trying to hiring another good employee. I knew a manager in CT who had to hire a physically handicapped person for housekeeping because she was the only applicant!

As for the guest supplies (little soaps, shampoo, shoe shine kits, etc.) it depends on what the manager wants to spend. Do you want cheap Revlon Flex shampoo or spend a few more cents and get some expensive brand like Pantene? Either way the guests pay for it. If the seal is broken, it gets replaced after you check-out, so take it - if you used it. To keep the guest supply costs under say a $1/rm, you just raise your rates a little - $75.95 instead of $75.00. Of course, if the rates get too high, you lose occupancy and then you start to trim expenses (back to the Revlon shampoo). Its a balancing act.

I agree with Markxxx regarding the security issues. If you are an attractive female traveling you don't want some guy calling you who saw you check into Rm 245. I had a wife curse me like a sailor one time because I would not give her a key to the hotel room! The registration card only had 1 guest listed. We both knew her husband was screwing around in the room but I could not legally give her a key. On the flip side, I had the police with me when I attempted to have the tires removed from a guest's car because he said he didn't have money for the room. I could not take the car, it was worth more than the hotel bill. But the police said, "Sure, $200 for 4 tires and a $190 hotel bill, no problem here." The guy came up with the cash in a flash.

But here I am going on and on with my stories. Just leave at least a buck/night's stay.

------------------
"Quoth the Raven, 'Nevermore.'"
E A Poe

[andros]

Great stories, ConMan! Sound like some from my tenure in the restaurant biz.

BUT, no one has yet given me any compelling reason to tip.

We're not always talking minimum wage here. You said:
many make around $7 or more

I know that's not a lot, but ain't a sweatshop. And I don't see how that justifies the "oh, give them the money, it's only a couple bucks" attitude. If the hotel is paying housekeepers to do a job, they should do it without my having to give them bribes or warm fuzzies.

Christ in hushpuppies, I worked in kitchens at mimimum wage for ages, and didn't get tipped. Why? I was getting paid to do my job.

Or are we just supposed to tip the "service" employees with whom we brush shoulders and screw the ones we don't see?

-andros-



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"Listen Children Eternal Father Eternally One!" Exceptions? None!
-Doc Bronner

[Monty]

A few items:

1) Bellhops. They're not providing an extra service by carrying your baggage--that's their freaking job!

2) Tips and minimum wage. There are actually two minimum wages in this land; one is for those who don't subsist on tips and the lower wage is for those who do live on tips. Not tipping those who get the lower wage is tantamount to having them work for free (or damn near free).

3) Thing not to do at a hotel. Don't rearrange the furniture in a hotel in the Mid-East. Messes the direction of the arrow pointing to Mecca.

[Lucky]

I still do not feel compelled to tip the maid. If the hotel is only paying her minimum wage because she has no other freaking skills, that is not my fault. The guy at my video store only makes minimum wage. Am I supposed to tip him too out of pity? How about the fry cook at my local McDonalds?
I am (for those of you with your doubts) a very courtious hotel guest. I do not make a mess of any sort in my room. My garbage cans are not overflowing, if the room comes with a coffee maker and/or mini bar and I use any of the cups/glasses provided, I rinse them out and stack them neatly for her to collect. Ditto for my room service plates. I am polite and smile and thank everyone.

I fail to understand the argument that if I can afford a $200 a night hotel room, I can afford to leave a tip, and that that somehow obligates me to do so. I can afford to buy the whole stack of StreetWise papers from the vendor, too, but I don't see as how it means I have to or even should. I worked damned hard for my money and was/am a good saver. I can spend my money however I choose and I refuse to feel bad about that.

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"I think it would be a great idea" Mohandas Ghandi's answer when asked what he thought of Western civilization

[Enright3]

Wow!!! What a bunch of cheap bastards! You're right, you don't tip the housekeeper because of what she earns. You tip the housekeeper because she provides a service for you.

Apparently some people tip them everyday. I've never heard of that. As a matter of fact, I've left money out during the day and they didn't take it. I always leave cash on the dresser with my room card after I check out.

What's this about "it's her freakin' job!!"? It's a waiter's/waitress' job to bring you food, etc. but you still tip, don't you? Geez, probably not. Again, the bell[person] is providing you a service. And so is your hair stylist, etc.

By the way, I've always tipped the bellhop according to the number of bags he's carried.

One last comment. When I was on the wagon, and I would go with a friend to a sports bar and drink nothing but tea, I would always leave minimum four or five bucks tip for taking up table space that she wasn't making as much money on.

For a good discussion on tipping, watch Reservoir Dogs. Steve Buscemi is the best.
Mr. Pink: I'm very sorry the government taxes their tips, that's fucked up. That ain't my fault. It would seem to me that waitresses are one of the many groups the government fucks in the ass on a regular basis. Look, if you ask me to sign something that says the governemnt shouldn't do that, I'll sign it, put it to a vote, I'll vote for it, but what I won't do is play ball. And as for this non-college bullshit I got two words for that: learn to fuckin' type, 'cause if you're expecting me to help out with the rent you're in for a big fuckin' surprise.

[Lucky]

I tip waiters and waitresses not because they are providing a service, but because I know they are paid less than minimum wage and depend on tips for a living. I don't much care for that particular system, but it is the system. The maid is not making less than minimum wage. Her paycheck may be shitty, but hey, so was mine before I went to school and got some skills.
The argument that you tip because someone is providing you a service is, frankly, bullshit. Do you tip the librarian who helps you find a book? Do you tip your garbage collector? How about the produce clerk who helps you find the cumquats? Your video clerk who recommeds a good movie? Your landlord for mowing the lawn?
You don't tip these people because they are already being paid for their service via their paycheck. If you think their paychecks are too low, then maybe you should notify their union. No union? Then feel free to complain to their employers. Hell, you can personally give them every dime you have because you feel sorry for them, but don't insist that everyone else has to do the same.

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"I think it would be a great idea" Mohandas Ghandi's answer when asked what he thought of Western civilization

[andros]

THANK you, Lucky. As much as I hate to say "Me too," me too.

The "providing a service" argument is a load. I DO tip, Enright. I tip folks who make less than minimum wage (waiters). And I also tip housekeepers and hairdressers and 'caps. But I'm fucking sick of it's being an obligation. I'm not an evil person if I don't tip someone who makes more than minimum wage. So, well, bite me.

And Lucky? I think you meant to say "kumquat." A cumquat must be something else entirely (blech). ;)

-andros-

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"Listen Children Eternal Father Eternally One!" Exceptions? None!
-Doc Bronner

[Lucky]

Andros;

Apparently you haven't met my produce clerk ;)

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"I think it would be a great idea" Mohandas Ghandi's answer when asked what he thought of Western civilization

[andros]

Lucky? I'm scared. And increasingly repulsed.

( . . . and strangely aroused . . .)

-andros-

[Enright3]

Points well taken, Lucky.

You're right, I don't tip those other people. I think your comment about "that's the system" has a lot of merit. Isn't "that's the system" really synonomous with "that's the way I was taught"? Some people tip the car hops at the Sonic Drive in, some don't. (think Arnold's in American Grafitti.) My dad always tipped them something, and now so do I.

The fact that waitstaff makes less than minimum wage has nothing to do with it for me. Good service = Good Tip, Rotten Service = small tip. This is apparently true for some though, because other waiters and waitresses are supposed to be the best tippers.

[AzRaek]

Here's thr freak of the week at my hotel: lady checked in on Friday- for 2 nights, she said, so the weekend rate is $59. She's still her a week later, even though we were oversold last night, She' still at $59, when the guy across the hall is paying $139. Each afternoon, she calls to say she's staying one more night. Each night, she comes to the desk to bitch about something- he water's too cold, the guests next door are too noisy, someone was rattling her door handle. So far, we've adjusted off 3 nights(of 6). If you hate it so much, leave. Even my GM said that when the Front Desk manager explained the situation. She'll probably leave a nasty comment card, not realizing just how accomodating we have been.

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"On the edge of sleep, I awoke to a sun so bright..."

[andros]

And the hotel let her stay? She booked for 2 nights, now the hotel is losing money on her. Any idea why it's policy to let people get away with that?

-andros-

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"Listen Children Eternal Father Eternally One!" Exceptions? None!
-Doc Bronner

[Monty]

Geez, Enright; you must've forgotten how to read. "What's this about "it's the freaking job?" Well, read the point immediately below that remark. Of course I feel compelled to tip waitstaff as they generally get the lower minimum wage; you know, the one geared to folks who rely on tips for their income.

[voguevixen]

I tip the hotel maid because I think it's bad enough to have to clean up your own mess, let alone 200 other people's on a DAILY BASIS. And it's hard. And unlike the people standing on the corner with a stack of "Streetwise" (I assume this is a homeless publication) he/she has actually gotten off their ass and went out and found some employment regardless of their skills and education rather than bitch and moan about how tough they have it and how "the Man" is against them, and I'd like to encourage that. I'd actually not have the room cleaned during my stay if I could get away with it just to give the people a break, but my husband thinks we're somehow being cheated if we don't dirty up as many sheets as possible; we've compromised on having the room cleaned every other day. Mostly, I tip service and waitstaff because they're doing something I DON'T WANT TO DO, and am willing to pay extra for it and make sure people will keep doing it. Also, I feel the need to make up for all the cheap bastards that think everything gets handed to them on a silver platter because they're so wonderful.

Thing to never do in a hotel: Kill yourself. A friend worked for a low-priced chain and apparently these places are popular ones to kill yourself in because the body will be found reasonably soon. By the cleaning staff. Of course, that's all part of the job, right? Serves them right for not being smarter or more skilled, huh?

[Lucky]

voguevixon;
I'd say the 'serves them right' attitude is a bit harsh, but I don't see how you can applaud them for having "gotten off their asses and found employment", and in the same breath patronize them by suggesting that their work is to be pitied. You say you want to encourge those who actually get a job instead of bitching about their lot in life. Well, most of us get up and go to work every day, yet you didn't say that you want to reward everyone who goes to work. Why do you single out the maid? Is it because you view her as a poor, pitiful girl who hasn't the brains to do anything else? You see her as beneath you and in need of your help, despite the fact that she has gottern herself a job and is not whining about 'the man'? I find that attitude very patronizing.
We all make choices in life. Some of us have it easier than others. Life is not fair. If you want the hotel maid to be paid $45,000 a year because she is a human being and all people deserve that, than vote socialist. In a capitalist society, people with higher skills earn more money. That's just the way it is. If you want to give the maid your money, go ahead. No one is stopping you. You are even free to start a charity to supplement the salaries of all maids, if you like. But don't pat yourself on the back as saviour of the downtrodden because you leave her a tip. Yes, the maid cleans (to take your figure) 200 rooms per day. That's her job! Period. She is not providing any extra service (though if I requested special service and got it, I would be happy to tip her as I do anyone who provides extra service. Doing her job is not extra service. It's theservice. And I paid for it with my room.
Your argument that you tip because they are providing a service that you don't want to do is disengenuous. When you go to Mc Donald's for dinner because you didn't want to cook, the fry cooks have just done something for you that you didn't want to do, but you don't tip them, do you? You hire a landscaping company to mow your lawn weekly because you don't want to do it. Do you pay them more than their contracted rate because it was something you didn't want to do?
You can tip anyone you like. It makes no difference to me. But don't cop some holier than thou attitude about it. It sounds to me like you're just doing it to relieve your guilt for being more priviledged. If that works for you, go ahead. I'm sure she'll be delighted. It still doesn't make it necessary and it still doesn't make you a better person.

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"I think it would be a great idea" Mohandas Ghandi's answer when asked what he thought of Western civilization

[ConMan]

Ever heard of the word - "SELLOUT"? I have boxed/bagged many suitcases on nights when we were sold out and people would not check-out on their due out dates. It was really easy with those card-key systems, too. Also, if that woman checked in with a reservation, the rate quoted is only good for the terms of the original reservation! She should then be paying $139! I'd jerk a knot in my FOM's head if he/she didn't know that!

And yes, I have told people, "I'm very sorry. It is obvious that we can not acommodate your requests. Please let me refund your cash payment (if applicable) and contact another hotel for you." And you know what? They shut-up, returned to the room and stayed for a week!

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"Quoth the Raven, 'Nevermore.'"
E A Poe

[GuanoLad]

For the record, I have always lived in a country that doesn't tip.

Everyone gets paid for the work they do, and neither expects, nor gets, any additional money from the people they provide services for.

And the world still turns, and greedy employers pay their employees a proper wage, (well, sort of), and frankly I think the whole idea of tipping anyone at any time ever is a load of bollocks.

You do your job for your employer, they pay you for it. The end.

Tipping is a stupid rule.



------------------
"Waheeey! 'Duck!' Get it?"
"Errr.... No..."
"Duck! Sounds almost exactly like fu-"

[AzRaek]

I would have done that too ConMan, but I'm "only" the res supervisor. I have no control over how the FD conducts itself (flipping horrible IMO)and no one can control the weekend clerks-this past weekend we had 4 walkuts because the clerks don't want to be so rude as to ask for payment anymore. Glad I'm only working part time after this month.

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"On the edge of sleep, I awoke to a sun so bright..."

[AzRaek]

Sorry- WALKOUTS. This damn 21 inch monitor, I can't see what I'm typing

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"On the edge of sleep, I awoke to a sun so bright..."