You want to know what's really wrong with America?

[Zebra]

It aint a lack of mass transportation I'll tell you what.

What is wrong with us? Talk about malaise.



OK, a few weeks ago, it was discovered that the Governor of New York, Mr. Spitzer, was paying $5 grand to meet with a young girl in a hotel and that he probably wanted to have anal or condom less intercourse and that he wasn't going to get that.

Now let's look across the pond to England

Nazi themed sex party by the head of Gran Prix Racing (http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/07/world/europe/07formula.html) in which, five women, count them 5 or as Mr. Mosley would say "Eins! Zwei! Drei! Vier! Funf!” some dressed in striped concentration camp costumes and how much does this cost?

Five Thousand Dollars. That's right; the same Mr. Spitzer paid to not get anal sex.

Why is sex so expensive in America? Who has inflated this for their own ends? The so called 'sex shortage' is a hoax people. Wake and stop the corporate big wigs from price gouging us into boring sex.

[hotflungwok]

Er, so the problem in America is a lack of anal sex with young girls?

[Zebra]

And it is so expensive!

For the same 5 grand that you can't get anal with in America, in England you can get 5 women in a whole Nazi theme night!

[Slithy Tove]

Er, so the problem in America is a lack of anal sex with young girls?

Yes, back in the good old days when that quaint trope that they'd remain "technical virgins" held sway. It was a simpler time, when being led down the primrose path had an off-ramp to the hershey highway.

[Giles]

I'm sure ex-Governor Spitzer seriously considered the option of concentration-camp-themed hookers, at a discount rate, but decided that it might not go down well with the Jewish vote in New York.

[Revtim]

But did they get Nazi-anal? That's where you fuck her ass and call it "Invading Poland".

[Zebra]

Sex is much more heavily taxed in Europe than in the US and yet we are actually paying more 'at the pump' for less.

[BrainGlutton]

Er, so the problem in America is a lack of anal sex with young girls?

:dubious: Well, duh!

Why do you think we keep losing global market share to the Japanese?!

[pbbth]

Life must be different for men. All the sex I have ever had, no matter how many people were involved or what the theme may have been, has always been free.

[Zebra]

I hate you.

[Precambrianmollusc]

Life must be different for men. All the sex I have ever had, no matter how many people were involved or what the theme may have been, has always been free.

You see right there, thats is the problem. America, once the land of opportunity where if there was an chance to make some money, there would be someone taking it. Here we have pbbth giving a valuable commodity away for free and thus leading to a demise in the domestic service industry in the US.

[AskNott]

Spitzer's $5000 wasn't really for sex. Sex, even anal, is much cheaper. He paid for the feeling of power and priviledge that comes with being able to have a $5000 call girl. It's not even the kind of power rush that he could show off!

[Cluricaun]

Here we have pbbth giving a valuable commodity away for free and thus leading to a demise in the domestic service industry in the US.

I'm sorry, I'll stop buggering immigrants right now. Well, give me 10 minutes.

[Alessan]

Life must be different for men. All the sex I have ever had, no matter how many people were involved or what the theme may have been, has always been free.

Communist.

[pbbth]

All this hate and name calling is probably why some of you don't have access to free sex. :)

[Noone Special]

Communist.
Don't you mean "cummunist"? :confused:

[Zebra]

All this hate and name calling is probably why some of you don't have access to free sex. :)


If I had access to free sex, I would be so filled with hate.

It's a classic Catch-22.

[BrainGlutton]

Life must be different for men. All the sex I have ever had, no matter how many people were involved or what the theme may have been, has always been free.

:dubious: Oh, yeah?! Just wait 'till the bloom is off your rose, honey! Then . . .

Then you'll still get it for free.

Hell, you could charge for it.

Yeah, life is different for men.

:mad: :(

[Astroboy14]

:dubious: Oh, yeah?! Just wait 'till the bloom is off your rose, honey! Then . . .

Then you'll still get it for free.

Hell, you could charge for it.

Yeah, life is different for men.

:mad: :(

On the other hand, orgasm is virtually a guarantee! Gimme 5 minutes and I'm there... :D

(2 if an actual female is involved)

[Really Not All That Bright]

Well, give me 10 minutes.
Let's be reasonable- we all know you aren't going to need that long.

Personally, I think this whole thing is great. About time somebody made F1 interesting again.

I was really just hoping they'd widen the tracks to make it easier to overtake, but beggars can't be choosers.

[pbbth]

Originally Posted by Zebra

If I had access to free sex, I would be so filled with hate.

It's a classic Catch-22.

Note to self, if ever having sex with Zebra charge him for it to prevent filling him with hate. :p

[Zebra]

lack of sex also screws with my grammer.

[Cluricaun]

Let's be reasonable- we all know you aren't going to need that long.

Well half of that is communicating via hand signals what's about to go down.

[BrainGlutton]

lack of sex also screws with my grammer.

And spelling.

[Belowjob2.0]

If you're relatively young, and in decent physical shape, free sex shouldn't be hard to come by. NPI



Oh, you mean sex with women.



That you'll have to pay for.

[ticker]

And it is so expensive!

For the same 5 grand that you can't get anal with in America, in England you can get 5 women in a whole Nazi theme night!

Ah but Max Mosley gets a family discount on Nazi themed stuff as his dad (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oswald_Mosley) founded the British Union of Fascists (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/British_Union_of_Fascists)

[detop]

Ah but Max Mosley gets a family discount on Nazi themed stuff as his dad (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oswald_Mosley) founded the British Union of Fascists (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/British_Union_of_Fascists) I guess it means the the family motto is "Dachau must go on" :D

I am SO going to Hell, for that one

[tdn]

lack of sex also screws with my grammer.
that so lame

[Sleeps With Butterflies]

Come on now, men can have free sex too. They just want sex with women who don't want to have sex with them. You want to play out of your league, you'll pay for it.. one way or another.

[OtakuLoki]

All this hate and name calling is probably why some of you don't have access to free sex. :)


No you've got it backwards - all this hostility stems from the inability some of us have had finding sex of any kind.

[Bryan Ekers]

I guess it means the the family motto is "Dachau must go on" :D


OUCHwitz

[Noone Special]

Godwin, some of these puns are awful! :p

[wring]

Why is sex so expensive in America? Who has inflated this for their own ends? The so called 'sex shortage' is a hoax people. Wake and stop the corporate big wigs from price gouging us into boring sex.
Don't have to go so far for cheap sex - I posted a thread a few days ago about the husband of the Junior Senator from MIchigan getting caught paying $150 to a prostitute. Yes, proof positive that the economy in Michigan, sucks.

[Zebra]

Only if she was really good looking.

[Really Not All That Bright]

Don't have to go so far for cheap sex - I posted a thread a few days ago about the husband of the Junior Senator from MIchigan getting caught paying $150 to a prostitute. Yes, proof positive that the economy in Michigan, sucks.
Yeah, what Zebra said. Having visited Michigan once I propose a more plausible explanation - the girl was ugly.

[kaylasdad99]

Spitzer's $5000 wasn't really for sex. Sex, even anal, is much cheaper. He paid for the feeling of power and priviledge that comes with being able to have a $5000 call girl. It's not even the kind of power rush that he could show off!Yeah, it's like wearing your rocketship underwear, and nobody even asking to see it.

[El Cid Viscoso]

Two anecdotes:

When I was a suit I'd grab the Amtrak from Grand Rapids to Chicago for business. I'd take them out for lunch, then drinks, then business dinner and it was usually pretty cool. Then on one visit it was discovered I had a suite at the Drake and one of my associates suggested he stay overnight in the guest bedroom and spring for hookers. At which point he and a tablefull of associates lavished me with tales of screwing whores all across the glorious city.

When I was a suit in Grand Rapids I was neck-deep in this bohemian 19-year-old girl. For a while she sheltered a young Korean hooker who said she made 1/2 of $500 per trick plus tip. One man only wanted to watch her swim in his big indoor pool as he inertly sat in a balcony. Christmas 1994 he tipped her with a baby grand piano to be kept, Scheherazade-like at his home. She worked for an agency called "Chimera" and that always made me laugh.

In my understanding one only exchanges money for discretion, never for sex.

[BrainGlutton]

In my understanding one only exchanges money for discretion, never for sex.

Problem is, the sex is the only part you can reasonably be sure of getting.

[eleanorigby]

And yet I recall hearing that the dollar was at one of its weakest points lately....I guess a buck still does get a bang somewhere.

[Malacandra]

Come on now, men can have free sex too. They just want sex with women who don't want to have sex with them. You want to play out of your league, you'll pay for it.. one way or another.
This sounds like a Nice Gal Lament. Tolerably few men do, in fact, turn down horny Nice Gals in order to pine over Miss Unattainable.

I mean, I know it'll turn out to be our own fault one way or another, but you'll have to try a little harder to defend your thesis that men could all get free sex if they really wanted it. :)

[Johnny Angel]

Thomas Riley Marshall, former Vice President of the United States, is best remembered for saying, "What this country needs is a really good five-cent cigar." Here's hoping we will long remember Zebra's Corollary.

[Sleeps With Butterflies]

This sounds like a Nice Gal Lament. Tolerably few men do, in fact, turn down horny Nice Gals in order to pine over Miss Unattainable.

I mean, I know it'll turn out to be our own fault one way or another, but you'll have to try a little harder to defend your thesis that men could all get free sex if they really wanted it. :)

I'm not a nice gal, believe it. ;)

[Nic2004]

But did they get Nazi-anal? That's where you fuck her ass and call it "Invading Poland".
It had to be Poland because, as you may know, they don't accept Czech.

[adhemar]

Because there are women who will have sex with just about anyone. I have met several in the circles I run in so I am sure there must be more out there. 2 that I know have given up the lifestyle, one is still there as far as I know. Very few guys turned them down and several women accepted as well.
I try very hard not to know that much about other peoples private matters any more. That being said, apart from the sex thing I thought were all interesting people to talk too.

Adhemar
(fyi that's Ms. Adhemar)

This sounds like a Nice Gal Lament. Tolerably few men do, in fact, turn down horny Nice Gals in order to pine over Miss Unattainable.

I mean, I know it'll turn out to be our own fault one way or another, but you'll have to try a little harder to defend your thesis that men could all get free sex if they really wanted it. :)

[Biffy the Elephant Shrew]

I'm not a nice gal, believe it. ;)
Or ask the butterflies.

[Sleeps With Butterflies]

Or ask the butterflies.

Ask what? You lost me

[eleanorigby]

Ask what? You lost me


Um, 'cause you sleep with them?



Were you in on the birds and bees bit or were you just fluttering by? :)

[Sleeps With Butterflies]

Um, 'cause you sleep with them?



Were you in on the birds and bees bit or were you just fluttering by? :)

Wow, I am extra, extra blonde today. That went riiiiiiiight over my head.

[rayh]

Wow, I am extra, extra blonde today. That went riiiiiiiight over my head.

He was that excited?

[Sleeps With Butterflies]

He was that excited?

No, no. I'm watching baseball tonight.... no time for a man. Plus, any man who couldn't control himself in that capacity wouldn't get a return engagement.

[TokyoBayer]

No, no. I'm watching baseball tonight.... no time for a man. Plus, any man who couldn't control himself in that capacity wouldn't get a return engagement.No even with all that power in there? It's got to be better than a dribbler.

[Sleeps With Butterflies]

No even with all that power in there? It's got to be better than a dribbler.

I can't speak for all women, but all the women I know aren't really interested in the power of the money shot. That's in pornos and gym locker rooms, it seems.

[JHWT]

I can't speak for all women, but all the women I know aren't really interested in the power of the money shot. That's in pornos and gym locker rooms, it seems.

I'm sensing an undercurrent of contempt for men in your posts. I like it! :cool:

[TokyoBayer]

I can't speak for all women, but all the women I know aren't really interested in the power of the money shot. That's in pornos and gym locker rooms, it seems.Hey, even if women aren't impressed, anything that could go over their heads would be worth writing home to mother about.

[BrainGlutton]

Because there are women who will have sex with just about anyone. I have met several in the circles I run in so I am sure there must be more out there.

And you are located where?

[BrainGlutton]

I can't speak for all women, but all the women I know aren't really interested in the power of the money shot.

:rolleyes: It wasn't invented for you!

[buttonjockey308]

Come on now, men can have free sex too. They just want sex with women who don't want to have sex with them. You want to play out of your league, you'll pay for it.. one way or another.

IN your league OR out, you'll pay for it.. one way or another. Hookers just take business from bartenders.

[Sleeps With Butterflies]

IN your league OR out, you'll pay for it.. one way or another. Hookers just take business from bartenders.

What kind of girls do you entertain? Most girls I know buy their own drinks. The last thing you want is a guy following you around the bar/club because he bought you a drink. Plus, if a guy is interesting and attractive you want to talk to him without bribes.

:rolleyes: It wasn't invented for you!

That was kind of the point of my comment you were responding to.

Hey, even if women aren't impressed, anything that could go over their heads would be worth writing home to mother about.

I'm betting you have some pretty interesting conversations with your mother.

I'm sensing an undercurrent of contempt for men in your posts. I like it! :cool:

I have right-out-in-the-open contempt for certain male behaviors. Also for certain female behaviors :p

[Really Not All That Bright]

What kind of girls do you entertain? Most girls I know buy their own drinks. The last thing you want is a guy following you around the bar/club because he bought you a drink. Plus, if a guy is interesting and attractive you want to talk to him without bribes.
I think we've established that this thread is about men who are boring and unattractive- hence the drink-buying.

[Sleeps With Butterflies]

I think we've established that this thread is about men who are boring and unattractive- hence the drink-buying.

Prostitution isn't just for the boring and unattractive. After all, it's been said that it isn't about getting her to sleep with you... it's getting her to leave ;)

[OtakuLoki]

Prostitution isn't just for the boring and unattractive. After all, it's been said that it isn't about getting her to sleep with you... it's getting her to leave ;)


That's easy - just let me say, "Hello." ;)

[rayh]

That's easy - just let me say, "Hello." ;)

I'm leaving.

[BrainGlutton]

Plus, if a guy is interesting and attractive you want to talk to him without bribes.

Which still leaves the cosmically important question unresolved: How does he get into your pants anyway if he isn't?

(And believe me, it is an important question; if uninteresting and unattractive guys never got laid, there would be ten times as many wars as now.)

[Sleeps With Butterflies]

Which still leaves the cosmically important question unresolved: How does he get into your pants anyway if he isn't?

(And believe me, it is an important question; if uninteresting and unattractive guys never got laid, there would be ten times as many wars as now.)

Unfortunately, I can only speak for me. The answer for me is: he wouldn't. Period.

That said, someone that I find unattractive or uninteresting might be someone else's cup of tea.

[Syntropy]

Come on now, men can have free sex too. They just want sex with women who don't want to have sex with them.
Which they don't seem to understand at all, because while they all deserve and expect a supermodel/goddess, we should just accept them for who they are and be thrilled to tears that they're showing us any attention at all. It's really rather pitiful to see their faces when the universe doesn't line itself up with that expectation.

[TokyoBayer]

What kind of girls do you entertain? Most girls I know buy their own drinks. The last thing you want is a guy following you around the bar/club because he bought you a drink. Plus, if a guy is interesting and attractive you want to talk to him without bribes. What was it that Dave Letterman once complained about boring guests? Something people who show up and can’t even think of with two or three interesting topics or episodes in their lives.

During my bar crawling days, I made it a point of never buying drinks, because of this. If I couldn’t hit it off with a woman, then move on.I'm betting you have some pretty interesting conversations with your mother.Nope, I never got the height required to report.I have right-out-in-the-open contempt for certain male behaviors. Also for certain female behaviors :pI encourage that. If more women (and men) provided immediate feedback, things would change.

[Count Blucher]

Thomas Riley Marshall, former Vice President of the United States, is best remembered for saying, "What this country needs is a really good five-cent cigar." Here's hoping we will long remember Zebra's Corollary.

Long will it live in the Annals of American History.

-d&r-

[Zebra]

I don't care how far 'down' on goes on the attractivness scale, getting FIVE women to play Nazi Concentration Camp is really difficult without exchanging money.

[Sleeps With Butterflies]

Which they don't seem to understand at all, because while they all deserve and expect a supermodel/goddess, we should just accept them for who they are and be thrilled to tears that they're showing us any attention at all. It's really rather pitiful to see their faces when the universe doesn't line itself up with that expectation.

Agreed. I blame some of that on Hollywood with their unrealistic couplings. Life is not "King of Queens" and you're not getting Leah Remini, fella.

[Zebra]

mmmmm.... Nazi Leah Remini

[Syntropy]

I don't care how far 'down' on goes on the attractivness scale, getting FIVE women to play Nazi Concentration Camp is really difficult without exchanging money.
Reality tv seems to be a popular way to gather bimbos and get them to do embarrassing things. Even Flavor Flav managed to get a few women to eat a brick of fois gras*. Just set up some video equipment in various rooms and tell them you're taping an episode of Girls Gone Wild.


*on the premise that only really classy babes like the stuff enough to eat that much of it.

[pbbth]

Originally Posted by Zebra

I don't care how far 'down' on goes on the attractivness scale, getting FIVE women to play Nazi Concentration Camp is really difficult without exchanging money.

How does one play Nazi Concentration Camp anyhow? Get 5 naked girls to run around screaming, "No, mein fuhrer, please do not give me ze lethal injection! I will do anyzing!" or is it just trying to cram too many people into a shower?

[hotflungwok]

How does one play Nazi Concentration Camp anyhow? Get 5 naked girls to run around screaming, "No, mein fuhrer, please do not give me ze lethal injection! I will do anyzing!" or is it just trying to cram too many people into a shower?
Don't forget the medical experiments.

[BrainGlutton]

If more women (and men) provided immediate feedback, things would change.

Or fistfights would break out.

[Gary "Wombat" Robson]

I was really just hoping they'd widen the tracks to make it easier to overtake, but beggars can't be choosers.It appears that buggers can't be choosers, either.


Or can they?

[eleanorigby]

Which they don't seem to understand at all, because while they all deserve and expect a supermodel/goddess, we should just accept them for who they are and be thrilled to tears that they're showing us any attention at all. It's really rather pitiful to see their faces when the universe doesn't line itself up with that expectation.


May I say I love you?

[Syntropy]

Why, thanks, el, darlin'. I think pretty highly of you, too. (you need to do another nursing pop quiz thread. I was on vacation last time and missed it)

[Siam Sam]

It aint a lack of mass transportation I'll tell you what.

Why is sex so expensive in America? Who has inflated this for their own ends? The so called 'sex shortage' is a hoax people. Wake and stop the corporate big wigs from price gouging us into boring sex.
The main problem is the lack of blowjob bars in America. Thailand has this problem licked.

[Starving Artist]

That's right; the same Mr. Spitzer paid to not get anal sex.

I recall reading somewhere that the dangerous activity Spitzer was prone to ask for was condom-free sex. I believe I read that in the police report on The Smoking Gun but I'm not sure. Still, I recall reading it from an official source somewhere.

[Zebra]

So he was paying 5K for striaght sex with a condom?

RIP-OFF!


I so need to move to Amsterdam.

[Klytus]

So he was paying 5K for striaght sex with a condom?

RIP-OFF!


I so need to move to Amsterdam.

Screw the money!... er, so to speak. If I were a prostitute, there is no way condoms would not be used unless my client could produce the paperwork for a blood test done 3 months ago that they were disease free, and I *knew* for a fact that they had been shagging no one else in that time. Even at 5K a pop, I'm not too keen on getting HIV - nor do I want to give it to the ladies I love... or at least the ladies I don't charge for sex.

[pbbth]

I'm with Klytus on this one. There isn't enough money in the world for me to chance my health like that (though granted even with a condom it isn't a guarantee of a perfectly disease free activity.) I would be willing to play concentration camp victim or any other role playing scenario you wanted, wear whatever costume, involve whatever food products, let your friends watch and hold up score cards like they are Olympic judges, let you watch me and my friends and hold up score cards like you are an Olympic judge, etc. Really I am down with pretty much anything that doesn't involve children, animals, corpses or excrement, but there isn't any amount of money that could make me feel comfortable with laying there worrying that I am contracting a horrible disease while some guy goes about his business. There are far less deadly ways to make money.

[Really Not All That Bright]

let your friends watch and hold up score cards like they are Olympic judges
Dude.

*scribbles another item onto list of long-term life goals*

[Starving Artist]

I would be willing to play concentration camp victim or any other role playing scenario you wanted, wear whatever costume, involve whatever food products, let your friends watch and hold up score cards like they are Olympic judges, let you watch me and my friends and hold up score cards like you are an Olympic judge, etc. Really I am down with pretty much anything that doesn't involve children, animals, corpses or excrement...So, uh, may I be the first to say...

How you doin'? :D

[Zebra]

Really I am down with pretty much anything that doesn't involve children, animals, corpses or excrement,


darn

[Gary "Wombat" Robson]

Really I am down with pretty much anything that doesn't involve children, animals, corpses or excrement, darnI presume you're saying "darn" to the animal part, Zebra? :D

Or were you interested in sex with poopy dead baby animals?

[Zebra]

no comment

[Klytus]

I'm with Klytus on this one. There isn't enough money in the world for me to chance my health like that (though granted even with a condom it isn't a guarantee of a perfectly disease free activity.) I would be willing to play concentration camp victim or any other role playing scenario you wanted, wear whatever costume, involve whatever food products, let your friends watch and hold up score cards like they are Olympic judges, let you watch me and my friends and hold up score cards like you are an Olympic judge, etc. Really I am down with pretty much anything that doesn't involve children, animals, corpses or excrement, but there isn't any amount of money that could make me feel comfortable with laying there worrying that I am contracting a horrible disease while some guy goes about his business. There are far less deadly ways to make money.

Now that is a kick-ass' fist date!

[Beware of Doug]

if uninteresting and unattractive guys never got laid, there would be ten times as many wars as now.)The problem isn't the uninteresting and unattractive guys; it's the interesting and/or attractive guys who get aced out by the alpha gorillas. They're the ones who undermine society.

[pbbth]

Originally posted by Klytus

Now that is a kick-ass' fist date!

Freudian slip? :)

[Siam Sam]

Freudian slip? :)
Possibly not. :eek: