A word for 'happy for someone even though you're also sad'?

[Sunspace]

Recently I was reading the SDMB and caught a thread about a poster's wedding preparations. I was happy for the poster, but that happiness was also tinged with a little sadness because it was the death of a dream for me: I'd been attracted to that poster and there was just the tiniest bit of hope there. This kind of thing has happened before, in real life even; I once went to the wedding of someone I was deeply attracted to and grieved the death of my hopes even as I celebrated her happiness.

My question: is there a single word for this kind of simultaneous pain and joy?

[Reply]

Bittersweet?

BTW, you might like this song (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UP5RFljGVzM). He talks for a while and the actual music starts at 2:18.

[tim314]

reverse-schadenfreude?

Because instead of taking delight in the misery of another, you're getting misery from the delight of another.

OK, I get that that's not quite what you're going for (since you're getting happiness and saddness from their happiness), but still, it ought to be a word. :)

[Reply]

Alternately, I'd like to propose the word lifezabeetchinnit.

[Shakes]

Somebody loves Alice


I'm the same way when I hear of a hot celebrity actress gets married that I have a schoolboy crush on.

[Shodan]

It's called "fatherhood".

Regards,
Shodan

[Sunspace]

Yes, 'bittersweet' is the best word I could come up with... but it's an adjective. :)

And it's not quite the same as finding that the hot celebrity is getting married, either, because the ordinary person never had a chance there anyways. For example, there was an article about Deepika Padukone (http://www.thestar.com/Entertainment/article/570539) in today's Toronto Star, and I was smitten, but I'd have to be a generation younger, rich, and living in India to even get close to her social circles.

[TroubleAgain]

I've always just referred to it as "mixed emotions."

[Emily Litella]

There's ambivalent (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/ambivalent) which means having positive and negative feelings at the same time.

[SmartAleq]

Wistful? Triste? Antinomy?

[ShibbOleth]

reverse-schadenfreude?


How about Freudenschade?

[MikeG]

Here's the song (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6IGMZUmi5QY) you were looking for.

[Gus Gusterson]

Yes, 'bittersweet' is the best word I could come up with... but it's an adjective. :)Bittersweetness is a noun.

[phouka]

I like "wistful," though wiktionary.org says it's more about longing and yearning.

If not that, then bittersweet, followed by mixed feelings.

[Elendil's Heir]

I forget who defined it as "the feeling you have when you see your mother-in-law driving off a cliff... in your new Porsche."

[devilsknew]

I like wistful as Smart Aleq and Phouka intone.

But might I introduce amours dolours, to coin a phrase.

[AllWalker]

May I suggest hurpy - a portmanteau of hurt and happy.

Al: You don't look so good. You okay?
Bob: Fine, I've just got a bad case of hurpies.

I can see that catching on.

[pricciar]

Hey! No need to come up with the word. It's more than possible (probable, even) that this person is doing all of these wedding preparations to set up a surprise wedding. Not to ruin the surprise, but they ARE in vogue right now. Keep an eye on your mailbox every day it might hold that invitation to a party were you are a co guest of honor!

[fisha]

Torn.

[mswas]

Recently I was reading the SDMB and caught a thread about a poster's wedding preparations. I was happy for the poster, but that happiness was also tinged with a little sadness because it was the death of a dream for me: I'd been attracted to that poster and there was just the tiniest bit of hope there. This kind of thing has happened before, in real life even; I once went to the wedding of someone I was deeply attracted to and grieved the death of my hopes even as I celebrated her happiness.

My question: is there a single word for this kind of simultaneous pain and joy?

Ha, you're a braver man than I. I didn't even go to the wedding of a girl I had prieviously been in love with, and have since lost touch with her.

[Asimovian]

For example, there was an article about Deepika Padukone (http://www.thestar.com/Entertainment/article/570539) in today's Toronto Star, and I was smitten, but I'd have to be a generation younger, rich, and living in India to even get close to her social circles.Yow. That is all.

[Nzinga, Seated]

May I suggest hurpy - a portmanteau of hurt and happy.

Al: You don't look so good. You okay?
Bob: Fine, I've just got a bad case of hurpies.

I can see that catching on.

Hee!

[Sunspace]

Yow. That is all.I think I might go to a movie this weekend.