Stupid Computer Tricks

[BlackKnight]

Some people like to know how to overclock an Athlon. Some people like to know how to write good, concise C++ code. Some people like to know how to create/break various forms of encryption.

Not I; I prefer Stupid Computer Tricks (and semi-colons; but let's not get into that).

You know, like changing the "Start" button in Windows to your name. Or changing the picture Windows displays when it boots up. Or changing the color of the scrollbar in your browser with a CSS.

In other words, the useless, inane, and utterly fascinating little things one can do with equal parts computer and spare time.

Does anyone know any neat-o Stupid Computer Tricks?

I offer this one to get things started:

Changing The Start Button Text
1) Make a copy of EXPLORER.EXE and save it somewhere safe. This is just a precaution.
2) Change the file attributes of EXPLORER.EXE so that it is no longer read only.
3) Open EXPLORER.EXE in a text editor (a PURE text editor; one that doesn't add its own formatting). I strongly recommend DOS's EDIT.COM for this. I used the command "edit /70 explorer.exe". This opens the file and displays it with 70 columns, making it easier to find what we're looking for.
4) Scroll waaaay down to near the end of the file. Eventually you'll see words, instead of the code gibberish. Keep scrolling until you see what appear to be words whose letters are seperated by spaces. Ex: U n a b l e t o r u n t h i s c o m m a n d
5) Look for the word "Start" spaced out this way. There should be a clover symbol to the left of it.
6) Change the text to whatever you want. Keep in mind that the "spaces" between the letters must remain there, and that they are NOT spaces! They are ASCII value 0, which can be typed by holding down ALT while pressing 0, then releasing ALT. Also note that the clover symbol is ASCII 5 (move the cursor to that symbol; look in the lower right corner of EDIT's screen and it will say "Value:5"). If you change the "S t a r t" to something with more (or less) than 5 letters, you must also change the clover symbol to the character that is represented by the ASCII value of the number of letters. For example, if you changed it to "R i c h a r d" you need to change the clover into ASCII 8. You can do this by holding down ALT while pressing 8, then releasing ALT.

7) Save the file after you've made your change.

You will need to restart Windows (or at least explorer) for the change to take affect, IIRC. Also, although I haven't tested this myself, I believe there is a 255 letter maximum for length.

[Gunslinger]

I got into the registry and changed the title bar of IE to read "Microsoft Internet Explorer provided by the Microsoft Monopoly". Unfortunately, I don't remember how I did it.

[Harmonious Discord]

I want a patch that changes the message on startup. "This computer was not shut down properly bah bah bah run scandisk." The message sould read "This peice of crap operating system locked up again. Please wait 5 minutes while scan disk tries to run and fix all the errors we caused on your hard drive."

Things to try:
Replace the start up graphic with one thats been fliped in a graphics program and saved upside down.

Change the short cut icons and names to other programs that are on the desk top. Clicking Excel opens Word, and Word opens Excel.

Here's one to try out. Those blinking leds on boxes, to get your attention, fit right into the case holder for the power led in the computer case.

[Gozu Tashoya]

Take a screenshot of the desktop, and save it as a jpg or something. Take (as in cut and paste) all the icons off of the desktop, stick 'em in a new folder, and stick this folder in some directory on the hard drive. Set the screenshot of the desktop to be the wallpaper, then pull the taskbar down so it doesn't show.

The result: A desktop that looks normal, but that doesn't do a damn thing. Like I said, a dumb trick, but fun.

[Gozu Tashoya]

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, for this trick to work right, you have to fiddle with some of the desktop settings. Something like the "view as web page" option(s) or soemthing of the sort.

[Harmonious Discord]

I have a program from the internet that, takes a snap shot of the desktop when executed. You put it in Windows start up folder and it runs at start up. It then shows the desktop image upside down over the whole desktop. Simply envoke the task manger, and end task. Most people I work with don't even know what the task manager is.

[randomlyblanks]

Or changing the picture Windows displays when it boots up.
How do you do this!?

[Skelji]

There are several webpages for doing stuff like this in Win95, but does anyone know of any for Win98?

[Harmonious Discord]

Here's a simple one page hoe to link.
http://nfs.hwextreme.com/review13/

Here's a link with fancy programs to do even more.
http://www.freewarehome.com/desktop/sp_tools.html

Windows 98 2nd edition still is modifiable.

[Frannie]

I have a cute li'l program called, "T-Clock" that makes it easy to change your Start button... Right now, mine is adorned with a candy cane and reads, "Ho ho ho!" Oh, and the program allows one to customize one's clock too, of course.

[BlackKnight]

Thanks to all who have responded!

Gunslinger, I too have done that before. IIRC, here's how you do it:
1) Open REGEDIT.EXE
2) HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\Software\Microsoft\Internet Explorer\Main
3) Create a new string value named "Window Title" (w/o the quotes).
4) Reboot is necessary for it to take effect.

Here's another one I remember. It doesn't work in Win98, and I'm not sure if it works with all versions of Win95.

Shutting Down the Start Button
1) Click on the Start button (or press the windows key) and then press ESC. or Click once on an icon on the desktop, then press tab. The point here is to have the Start button selected, but not have the menu open. If this is done correctly, and if you look closely, you can see the little dotted box around the word "Start" (or whatever, if you've changed it).
2) Hold down ALT, and press the minus (-) key. A menu should pop up. Select "Close" from the menu.

This is a very fun prank to pull on someone. You have to restart Explorer (at least; not entirely sure) to get it back.

Very usefull in places that haven't upgraded to Win98 yet. (*cough*highschoolcomputerlab*cough*) ;)

Phobia, thanks for providing the links!

Here's the other one I mentioned in the OP:

Neat-o Scrollbar Trick With Style Sheet
1) In an HTML document, add the following style definition:
Body { scrollbar-face-color:#000000; scrollbar-arrow-color:#000000; scrollbar-highlight-color:#000000; }
2) If you know HTML, you probably know what to put in for the #000000's. If not, here's the quick & dirty explanation. The # is just there 'cause it's gotta be there. Don't question it. The first two numbers are the amount of RED, the second two are GREEN, and the third pair are BLUE. These values range from 00 to FF in hexadecimal. If you don't know hexadecimal, either learn it, or use decimal values 0 to 255, and then convert them to hexidecimal with Windows' calculator.

Example template with scrollbar black, scrollbar arrow white, and some pastel-greenish highlight:
[i]<html><head><title>TEST PAGE</title></head>
<style>
Body { scrollbar-face-color:#000000; scrollbar-arrow-color:#FFFFFF; scrollbar-highlight-color:#B0FFB0; }
</style>
<body bgcolor="#ffffff" text="#000000" id=all>
</body>
</html>

[BlackKnight]

Originally posted by Frannie
Right now, mine is adorned with a candy cane and reads, "Ho ho ho!" Oh, and the program allows one to customize one's clock too, of course.

Does anyone know how this program works to change the pic? I would love to know how to do that manually (or write my own prog, whatever).

[AHunter3]

KKBattousai:

Take a screenshot of the desktop, and save it as a jpg
or something. Take (as in cut and paste) all the icons
off of the desktop, stick 'em in a new folder, and stick
this folder in some directory on the hard drive. Set the
screenshot of the desktop to be the wallpaper, then
pull the taskbar down so it doesn't show.

The result: A desktop that looks normal, but that
doesn't do a damn thing. Like I said, a dumb trick, but
fun.


Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, for this trick to work right,
you have to fiddle with some of the desktop settings.
Something like the "view as web page" option(s) or
soemthing of the sort.

Well, that's a start. What you really want to do is take that screenshot (from Windows) and set it as the background picture on a MacOS computer, then take a screen shot of the Mac's Desktop and set THAT as the PC's wallpaper. Then switch the monitors so that the PC is showing a normal PC desktop except that what you are really looking at is hooked to the Mac sitting next to it.

Then you switch the mice and keyboards.

Heh heh heh...

[Geek Mecha]

Be sure to turn the jpgs upside down when you set them on the desktops.

[Geek Mecha]

Er, make that before you set them on the desktops.

[Gozu Tashoya]

Originally posted by AHunter3


Well, that's a start. What you really want to do is take that screenshot (from Windows) and set it as the background picture on a MacOS computer, then take a screen shot of the Mac's Desktop and set THAT as the PC's wallpaper. Then switch the monitors so that the PC is showing a normal PC desktop except that what you are really looking at is hooked to the Mac sitting next to it.

Then you switch the mice and keyboards.

Heh heh heh...



ROFL! That's frickin' AWESOME! Too bad the only Macs I have access to are iMacs - kinda hard to disguise those.... :)

[Badtz Maru]

One thing pranksters at work would do is set your mouse to left-handed operation and see how long it took you to figure out what the problem was. Average is around 10 seconds, I have seen people call helpdesk over it before, though.

[BlackKnight]

AHunter3, that's absolutely, positively, completely EVIL!

I love it!

[SwimmingRiddles]

I'm printing this off and changing the start buttons on all the computers at work. If I'm stealthy enough, they won't even know it's me. And I'd be willing to wager that it takes them months and months to even realise it was changed.

Heh. Keep 'em coming.

[handy]

Put your mouse on the taskbar & drag it to the top of the screen. Presto, instant Mac computer!

You can do most of that stuff listed above with programs instead of messing with things you don't know much about with programs from: http://www.freewarehome.com/utilities/shell.html

e.g.:
WinMac is a freeware which gives a functional Macintosh ® toolbar for Windows 95. This Finder menu bar can be shown in both
System 7.5 style and Mac OS 8 (formerly known as Copland) style. It also gives you an option to change your desktop icons to
both styles.

[BlackKnight]

Originally posted by handy
You can do most of that stuff listed above with programs instead of messing with things you don't know much about with programs from: http://www.freewarehome.com/utilities/shell.html

Thank you very much for the link handy!

Personally, I refuse to use any program to perform a neat-o trick that I can do manually unless I write that program myself. I'm bizarre that way, I know. :)

To keep things rolling, I present yet another Stupid Computer Trick:

Win95 to Win3.1
This trick merely changes the shell from Explorer.exe to Progman.exe, the shell that Win3.1 used. There's no real point to it, unless you truly prefer the Win3.1 interface or are nostalgic. This is the trick I got suspended from high school (for a day) for performing, because they thought I'd actually uninstalled Win95 and returned the machine to 3.1 or something.

1) Click on Start, then select Run. Type in "sysedit" and press Enter.
2) Of the windows that show up in the main System Configuration Editor window, click on System.INI to bring it to the foreground.
3) Find the line that reads "shell=Explorer.exe". It should be right near the top.
4) Edit the line to read "shell=progman.exe". It's that simple. Save the file, of course. You can easily edit the system.ini file in notepad or another text editor, if you prefer.
5) Restart Windows and it will look like Win3.1 instead of the Win95 desktop. To undo this, just open the System.ini file and edit it so that the line reads "shell=Explorer.exe" again.

[Harmonious Discord]

Go to the mouse contol and move the settings all to the fastest possible. That's were I use them, and I find most people can't handle that set up. Newbies can never double click and others over shoot the buttons.

[BlackKnight]

[pathetic self-pity]Why can't my threads last more than a couple of days, tops? I'm a worthless baboon.[/pathetic self-pity]

Well, I'm going to keep it alive at least a little longer, even if I'm the only one posting, and even if (as is inevitable) the tricks keep getting stupider.

Cheating Minesweeper
Minesweeper is fun, but I suck at it. That's why I cheat. ;)

1) Open Notepad (or another text-editor; I prefer Notepad for its simplicity)
2) Open the file WINMINE.INI, which is located in the C:\WINDOWS\ directory.
3) You'll see lines that start with "Time1=", "Time2=", "Name1=", etc. This is pretty much self-explanatory. Instead of the value currently after "Time1=", add whatever time you want for the beginner difficulty setting. I like using 0, even though it's obvious then that I'm cheating, as there is no way to defeat any difficulty setting on Minesweeper in 0 seconds. After "Name1=", put whatever name you want.
Example:
Time1=0
Time2=0
Time3=0
Name1=BK
Name2=BK
Name3=BK
4) Save the file. Now, when you run Minesweeper and view the high scores, the names and times you just entered will appear. Amaze your friends! Astound your enemies!

If this thread doesn't start picking up pace, I'm going to have to explain how to forge e-mail. *grin*

[Meephead]

Two more ways to cheat at minesweeper:

Stop the clock:
Start a game and push both mouse buttons at the same time.
This will mark 9 spaces. Now, depress both mouse buttons and push Escape. This will stop the clock.

Reveal whether a space is safe or not:

To turn it on an indicator that will show whether a space is safe to click on or not, type xyzzy, then press [enter], then [shift]. The indicator will be a single white pixel in the upper left had corner of the screen.Make sure there is not a program covering this area, or you won't see it.


To Draw one card in a Draw 3 Solitaire game:
Hold down [Ctrl]+[Shift]+[Alt] while clicking on the deck to draw your cards.

[BurnMeUp]

like "programs" and the like

1. Open "my computer"
2. Drag and drop the icons for the drives (local or networked) on the start button

you can now navigate through your nhard drive from the start button.

Note: this does not work with shortcuts, it must be the true drive icons from "My computer"

[Balance]

If you have an inclination to meddle with NT or W2K, I recommend http://is-it-true.org/ It's full of handy little tweaks, tricks, and hacks.

I loaded themes and a new startup screen on my NT box at the office--my coworkers are still baffled by my Final Fantasy VIII theme. My startup screen is a shot of Balamb Garden rather than a certain hated corporate logo.

[Wonko The Sane]

Originally posted by BurnMeUp
like "programs" and the like

1. Open "my computer"
2. Drag and drop the icons for the drives (local or networked) on the start button

you can now navigate through your nhard drive from the start button.

Note: this does not work with shortcuts, it must be the true drive icons from "My computer"



You rock BurnMeUp! Thanks!
I set up a subdirectory in my start menu called "phone numbers" and have another subdirectory for each person, and a file with their phone number as a filename. It makes it so easy to find their number. I could, if I wanted to make it a batchfile that dialed my modem (if I had one) but I'm not that far gone yet...

[LifeWillFall]

This little shell replacement can do any of the things you mentioned and so much more. http://www.litestep.org, I'm currently using turtle soup II, I think this program rocks and I love when people come look at my computer and say "where's the start menu" or "what's that big turtle for" I just snicked and remember how big of a dork I am

[krillin]

does anyone know any good trick for macs, and thanks for the desktop screenshot idea it was great to see my dad restat his pc 4 times before i changed it back.

the Smurf

[Wonko The Sane]

Here's a wierd url to put in your (or someone else's) startup.

http://www.yaromat.com/macos8/index.htm

Just silly.

[Enright3]

One of my favorite harmless practical jokes is to change the auto-correction feature in MSWord to 'correct' common words into something else. For example make it where everytime someone types in the word 'the' it changes to the word 'cow', or every time your boss's name is typed, it changes to 'asshole' or something like that.

[idiotboy]

Originally posted by BlackKnight
2) Change the file attributes of EXPLORER.EXE so that it is no longer read only.

OK, I feel quite stupid asking, seeing as I'm majoring in Computer Science, but how exactly do I do this? I went into windows explorer and un-checked the box marked "read-only"...but when I finally found the word "s t a r t" in the code and tried to change it, it said, "You cannot modify a read-only file." Do I need to change the attributes thru DOS? If so...how?

[soulsling]

idiotboy, this is so cute... a wet behind the ears techie.. :)

Boot from DOS, and then run edit, or, boot off of the cd, this way explorer.exe in your Windows directory won't be in use, you can change it's attributes, and modify the file.

NOTE
MAKE A BACKUP FIRST!!!

Have fun. ;)

[soulsling]

What I meant to say was...
Boot INTO DOS, and then edit from there.

:rolleyes:

[jovius]

Originally posted by idiotboy
"read-only"...but when I finally found the word "s t a r t" in the code and tried to change it, it said, "You cannot modify a read-only file." Do I need to change the attributes thru DOS? If so...how? [/B]

try in DOS:

from windows/command directory, enter ATTRIB -R

now it should be turned off (though it should've done it anyways in windows).

Neat tricks. Try this.

If your computer doesn't have a soundcard/speaker, install a PC speaker driver and make sure it loads from each boot-up. Now goto the web and find some short weird sounds (e.g. snoores, moans, or "You're Fired!"). Load these sounds during Windows Open, in SOUNDS menu from SETTINGS. Not a biggie but it's still fun for them to hear in the first time.

[soulsling]

Originally posted by krillin
does anyone know any good trick for macs...

Yeah. You can try ResEdit (http://www.sccs.swarthmore.edu/users/00/dbranni/ResEdit.html), though it's intended use is for developers to manipulate resources within files. It comes in handy when you want to make certain files/applications/folders... etc. invisible, unoticeable...

Even better, if you know your MacOS really well, you can try this, I've done this to one of my cow-workers...
Changed his desktop/appearance settings to something undesireable, configured his desktop clock to chime on the hour, quarter hour, and half hour with that annoying Mac quack sound, then in ResEdit, rendered the control panels, preferences, and any necessary extensions invisible, and renamed them as well as changed their icon so that through even the roughest search, unless he used ResEdit, couldn't figure out where they were. He was stuck with his desktop and sounds, except for bonus points, the next day I let him see his control panel for his desktop pictures again, only when ever he tried to change the picture, he would get a dialog box that made some rude innuendos... and just yesterday, I compiled a script (if you have OSA extensions and scripts in your macs) that launched when he tried to adjust volume, it came up with a false dialog box prompting the formatting of his harddrive and any connected drives, with only two buttons for choices, "OK", and "Go Ahead".

You can tamper with dialog boxes and settings in applications through ResEdit, but I strongly suggest you make backups first, ResEdit can destroy your Mac if your'e not careful.
Applescript is great, for silly little scripts like the one I made, though I'm sure you can download them off the web as well.
Using the Get Information option in your menus for files/applications, you can change the icons of files to fool fellow friends and coworkers...

Good Luck.

[idiotboy]

Originally posted by soulsling
idiotboy, this is so cute... a wet behind the ears techie.. :)

Boot from DOS, and then run edit, or, boot off of the cd, this way explorer.exe in your Windows directory won't be in use, you can change it's attributes, and modify the file.

NOTE
MAKE A BACKUP FIRST!!!

Have fun. ;)

D'oh! I guess I shoulda thought that since it's running, changes won't take place until restart...I'm feeling quite the idiot today... :D

[Edward The Head]

Only thing I do is change the Trash can's name. You can't, at least on NT4.0, chage it directly from the screen you need to get into the Regedit to do it. I changed a buddies at work about two years ago and I don't think he ever got it back. Even the tech guy couldn't change it back.

[idiotboy]

Ok, so I got it changed, however not to what I wanted it to. I tried doing Alt-0, but instead of inserting the "null" character, it wanted to select a menu from above...again, I suppose some assistance is needed... ;)

[teabag]

An old favourite is to change the screensaver to 3D Text and enter "volcano" (no quotes) as the text.

I agree with LifeWillFall - Litestep is awesome.

[cykrider]

Since BK doesn't really want his thread to die so fast, I think I might add a small hijack. Can anyone explain what the whole buisness of a shell is? How does it work and the such. Thanks .

[LifeWillFall]

Well a shell is the way that the windows OS interperts and runs dos. So in windows 9x and Me Explorer is the shell that is run in dos to produce a graphical user interface, it controls how the programs are access and attributes are adjusted. Litestep (link posted above) is a shell replacement for explorer, I find it more fun to define my graphical user interface on my own. you could get a shell account on a Unix machine which would allow you to run Unix programs on windows through the machine you are remotely connected to. Hope that cleared it up

[Harmonious Discord]

teabag

An oldie put goodie. I told my coworkers to figure out what the screen saver was doing. The people at work couldn't figure that one out for a week. I broke down and told them after a week. Dah!

My mother inspired the next. Turn the brightness down until you have a black screen. Now take it into a repair shop, because it doesn't work. Techs have a laugh for the next day or two.

[BlackKnight]

Originally posted by idiotboy
Ok, so I got it changed, however not to what I wanted it to. I tried doing Alt-0, but instead of inserting the "null" character, it wanted to select a menu from above...again, I suppose some assistance is needed... ;)

Oops! You're right, I think. Try copying and pasting the null character from another part of the file (should be all over the place).

I almost added the information about how to change file permissions in DOS, but I thought, "Nah, the post is long enough as it is."

I guess not everyone is as much of a DOS-phile as I am. :D

(Which reminds me of the time in Computer Science I when I wrote a simple batch file that did nothing but start notepad and loop ... 88 copies of Notepad later, the computer ran out of memory. Hehe.)

[Harmonious Discord]

DOS was so easy to screw with peoples minds. A few changes in the right places and people thought the hard drive was about to be formatted. <Press any key to continue>

How about changing the DOS prompt. My computer always read "Your wish is my command Master." Anybody else booting up was lost at this point.

[cykrider]

Wow, that was close, I came about 1/2 from losing everyting due to the start menu trick. thank god for recovery disks. I edited explorer.exe like you said, and then saved it as explorer2.exe then I renamed explorer.exe to explorit.exe. Then, like a dumb-ass I thought I could just rename explorer2.exe to explorer.exe. Didn't happen. But I'm back to normal now w/o the edited start button. (Doh!) I did all my editing in DOS. It still said explorer.exe was read-only, after I messed with the properties, that's why went through all the non-sense above, to try and get around the denial of editing. I guess I still don't get it. It was a real rush almost losing everything and then figuring out how to get it back. I love computers!


:Lord, I just found what a nerd I am:

[Astroboy14]

You guys probably already know this one, but it's my favorite for all-around-messing-with-those-who-know-nothing-about-computers, and is harmless, and is easy to fix!

And I want to keep this thread alive (I loveit!):D

Preferably done with brand-new computer, and user!
Take the mouse ball out when the sucker isn't looking, and hide it (if it's an optical mouse, a post-it over the camera-thingy works quite well...)!

When the stooge calls you (the by-comparison "expert") over, you poke thru the windows files, run any diagnostics you have, re-boot and go into the BIOS settings... anything you can think of that you can do without a mouse and looks impressive to a newbie! Then ask something like: "You DID descanfrag the registry before you shut down the last time, right? I've heard you can really fry a motherboard if you don't do that..."

When they reply with a horrified "WHAT?" You feign shock and say "OH MY GOD!!"

Keep it going as long as you can keep a straight face... but be prepared to run!

[soulsling]

*bump*

Just curious krillin if you tried any mac tricks?

handy, thanx for posting that link, I used DoubleDesktop here at work, very similar to what I can do on my Linux box at home only it's limited to two virtual desktops, well... It's loaded, and nobody knows what the heck happened to anything that was on the desktop before :eek:

Lots of fun hitting the hot key quickly and showing them that everything is fine... until I hit it again and leave...

They have no clue...

I'm using it at home as well and it's cool, it's on a Windows shell and lets you choose two different desktops... gonna have to look into how they do that...

[August West]

Did you know that there is a flight simulator-type-thingy in Microsoft Excel 97? It puts you in a bizarre, dark, purply world and you can fly around using your mouse. There is also a big gray angular stone that scrolls the names of the creators of Excel 97 in a biblical style. It's very strange, here's how to do it.

Open Microsoft Excel 97. Don't run other programs.
Open a new blank work sheet.
Press F5.
Type X97:L97 in the "Reference" box.
Click OK.
Hit the "Tab" key once to end up in cell M97.
Press "Ctrl" and "Shift" while clicking once on the "Chart Wizard" icon (the one at the top with the blue-yellow-red bar chart).
After a few moments you should be flying. Steer with the mouse, accelerate and decelerate with the left and right mouse buttons respectively, and hunt for the monolith. Exit by pressing Esc.

[Gozu Tashoya]

Originally posted by teabag
An old favourite is to change the screensaver to 3D Text and enter "volcano" (no quotes) as the text.


Mine doesn't do anything but send the word volcano flying all around the screen... I'm assuming it should do something cooler? :confused:

[Harmonious Discord]

I just checked it again for Win Me OS. It still works like it used too. The screen saver has to be "3D Text" and use all small letters and no spaces. Type in volcano and if it doesn't work for you this time, I'll tell you what it does.

Hint: You shouldn't see the word volcano, when it runs.

[BlackKnight]

Phobia, my DOS prompt was the normal C:\yadda yadda yadda but in a different color (with a different background color too). I love DOS.
:)

(If I can find my DOS 5.0 manual around here somewhere, I'll post how to that; something to do with ANSI.SYS, IIRC.)

BTW, thank you to everyone who responded to the OP! I love you all!

[orion007]

Originally posted by Astroboy14


Preferably done with brand-new computer, and user!
Take the mouse ball out when the sucker isn't looking, and hide it (if it's an optical mouse, a post-it over the camera-thingy works quite well...)!


Last year this kid in my school stole all the mouse balls from the 25 or 30 computers in the computer lab... no one was happy (but the kid who did it got caught and then he was the unhappy one :)). It was pretty funny.

[cykrider]

I was wondering if anyone knew how to change the text of "Windows 98" once you click on the start menu. I've seen stuff added before, which I wouldn't mind doing, but if at all possible I'd like to change that. Any ideas?



FTR- I finally changed the Start text w/o losing all of windows. 3rd times the charm!

[S-Terry Dan]

'cat /dev/hda1 > /dev/audio'

Really, anything catted into /dev/audio will make a noise of some sort. /dev/mouse (or gpmdata, or psaux, or whatever) makes more controllable noise.

"sl" is a program that runs an animated ASCII train when invoked. Good way to confuse someone who spooners "ls" often.

Any others?

[rjung]

Originally posted by krillin
does anyone know any good trick for macs
Swing by http://www.resexcellence.com/ -- more Mac-hacking tricks than you can shake Windows 98 at...

[CheapBastid]

We'd always torture our new techs by 'modifying' their machines. The screenshot as wallpaper was a classic, as well as the left/right mouse button switch. Another favorite is to record a really long wav file (5 minutes or so) with nothing in it and set it as a shutdown sound. The machine will appear to hang for the length of the wav file.

The poor bastard who has to re-boot several times goes crazy trying to figure out what is hanging that damn machine up.

There's also an NT 'blue screen of death' screen saver that has stopped the heart of many a newbie. It spins the hard drive and goes through an endless series of checks.

[capacitor]

My new browser is "The corruptor". My e-mail program is called "Virus Catching". And I open my OS "Don't do Windows for Me".

[Atrael]

I used to have a great hack for Win 9x...let you change the speed of the menu's when they pop up from the Start button. Either slow them waaaay down, or make them so fast it's hard to stay where you want. Great way to make a user think they have a faster computer. "Look, see how fast the menu's pop up now?" I'm not sure of the exact path for the registry hack, so I'll wait till I can find my notes on it.

Along similar paths, I also had a hack that would hide a drive from explorer and my computer. I'd routinly hide the A: drive on people just for the hell of it.

[Cumber]

I remember mucking around with the Windows NT logo back on the school computers. Nearly had a whole room of computers using one of my images by the end of the year. And one of my friends at one time started replacing the desktop images (grey with a printed message about getting rid of crap on the network drive or something) with a picure of Hitler and with a message written over the top that read something like "Greetings from your friendly neighbourhood system administrator." Needless to say he got into a little bit of trouble over that. :)

[Sofa King]

A great classic is [H]ardOCP's famous BSOD Screen Saver (http://www.hardocp.com/coolstuff.html). It's a great torture trick for the illiterati.

The W9x startup and shutdown screens can be altered to taste. I think they're called LOGO.SYS and and LOGOS.SYS. They sit in C:\WINDOWS. I used Photoshop to alter the flying window into a flying swastika, with the slogan, "taking over the world one computer at a time."

[BobSchroeck]

This works under any version of Windows at least up to 9x; I'm not sure about NT, ME, etc.

Make sure you have ansi.sys loaded in your config.sys, and put this command in your autoexec.bat:

prompt $e[s$e[=7l$e[0;60f$e[31;1m$d $t $e[0m$e[u$p$g$e[=7h

Now every DOS window/screen has not only the usual disk/path prompt, but up in the upper right corner of the screen you will have date and time, bright red, in the form of "Thu 02-08-2001 13:20".

I've been using this one for years...

-- Bob

[fng]

Alot of you seem to be pretty good hackers, I have a question that I'm hoping you can answer.
Soon everyone in the department will be forced to upgrade to the evil NT. Currently, I'm using 95 which I think rocks because of the control factor. Unfortunately, we have I.T. people that must have been members of the S.S. in an earlier life, hence, won't allow administrative privledges to any of the NT users. Is there some file I can hack or even a motherboard jumper setting that I can change which would override this?
Having to call these pinheads whenever you have to install upgrades etc. is really a pain in the arse.
tanx

[Gozu Tashoya]

No clue, myself, but you may want to stick a post in GQ. Seems to be a few extra techs in there.

[Balance]

Originally posted by fng
Unfortunately, we have I.T. people that must have been members of the S.S. in an earlier life, hence, won't allow administrative privledges to any of the NT users. Is there some file I can hack or even a motherboard jumper setting that I can change which would override this?


Ah, yes...IT people. Ours always want to take our machines away to their dungeons and reroll them with their brain-damaged "standard office environment" which horribly impairs performance and prevents us from doing anything useful.

I don't let them touch mine, and they don't know my admin password. I just wiped the drive and started over (I had to anyway, to get rid of their crap), but for password recovery without reinstall I use a linux boot disk. You can find a decent explanation and some relevant links at is-it-true.org (http://is-it-true.org/nt/atips/atips262.shtml). There are a lot of other handy and just plain neat NT hacks and tweaks on that site, as well. Use them at your own risk, though--some of them can hose up your machine to a fare-thee-well.

[TPWombat]

I seem to recall mention of a registry hack that would change the BSOD to a GSOD, or any other colour you fancied. Any takers, or is it a myth?

[cykrider]

Can anyone puhhhleez point me to where I can go to figure out how to change the "Windows 98" text when you click the start button? I've tried regedit.com winscript.com, is-it-true. Any help would be vunderful.

[BlackKnight]

How to change the BSOD to another color:

1) Open SYSTEM.INI (should be in the C:\windows\ folder)
2) Scroll down until you see the heading [386Enh]
3) Somewhere under that heading, add the lines:
MessageTextColor=x
MessageBackColor=y

x and y are each one of the following values
0 - Black
1 - Blue
2 - Green
3 - Cyan
4 - Red
5 - Magenta
6 - Yellow/brown
7 - White
8 - Gray
9 - Bright blue
A - Bright green
B - Bright cyan
C - Bright red
D - Bright magenta
E - Bright yellow
F - Bright white

Then just save, and wait until the next SOD! (Usually not more than a 5-minute wait.)

[TPWombat]

Originally posted by BlackKnight
How to change the BSOD to another color:.....


Thanks, BlackKnight!!!
<Tips Hat in Admiration>

[slortar]

I like litestep, too. However, I never use it because I like being able to drag icons and junk onto the desktop and the few modules that would allow you to do that never feel right. It also doesn't support my dual monitor setup very well (a dual monitor setup itself qualifies as a stupid computer trick in my opinion. :-) ).

Hm. Current favorite dumb computer trick is the "undeletable folders" ploy.

Open up a dos box (start-->programs-->ms dos prompt)

type: "cd c:\windows\desktop" to switch to the windows desktop. Now, type "mkdir I_am_a_Mouthbreathing_Imbecile"
EXCEPT, instead of typing an underscore, hold down the alt key and type 255 with the numberpad. While you're here, you might as well make another 30 or 40 of them, for effect. :-)

This will create a new folder on the desktop entitled "I am a Mouthbreathing Imbecile" Windows interprets the Ascii 255 as a space, but since it's not really a full space, it can't really deal with it directly. Whenever you try to rename or delete it from the normal windows explorer or desktop interface, you'll get an error message.

The only way to rename it or remove it is to get back into an ms-dos prompt and type "rmdir I_am_a_Mouthbreathing_Imbecile" with the same Ascii code replacing the underscores.

If you want to be even more of an annoying bastard, try using a code other than 255...

[BlackKnight]

Originally posted by slortar
The only way to rename it or remove it is to get back into an ms-dos prompt and type "rmdir I_am_a_Mouthbreathing_Imbecile" with the same Ascii code replacing the underscores.

If you want to be REALLY obnoxious, edit COMMAND.COM to change the rmdir and rd commands to something like xweri and lp (i.e., just random, highly un-guessable strings of characters).

BTW, I'm glad to see this thread back from the dead!

[fng]

Thanks man, looks like a pretty good site, got it bookmarked for my attack on I.T. when the dark days come.

[slortar]

I just ran across a couple of links for really amusing (and cruel) things you can do to your coworkers computers. Enjoy:

http://www.littlewhitedog.com/reviews_other_00015.asp
http://www.littlewhitedog.com/reviews_other_00019.asp

Part 1 and 2 of Little White Dog's Manual of Evil. :-)