I Dodged a Bulllet

[Paul in Qatar]

I am currently doing a four-week course to train me to be an English teacher. The Saudis are cracking down on qualifications and so here I sit in Denver doing the CELTA.

You have to do ten practice classes, four papers and this and that. I have been doing well. This (third) week we moved down to the beginner group of students. I taught my first class with them on Tuesday and hit them with some easy grammar today.

My tutor beet around the bush. She hemmed and hawed. Suddenly it occurred even to me that I had failed. If you fail one class you are out. But we chatted and she went back to her office and changed the grade to "Met Standards (weak)."

Great. I dodged the bullet. But I have two more classes I must pass, and I frankly do not know I can teach much better than I did today. (I am not going into details of my failure as I barely understand them myself. "Not connecting with the class.")

All I want out of life is the ability to sit in Saudi Arabia, go quietly mad and leave a nice estate to my nephews. I have failed in love and carry those scars very, very deeply. Fine, that is the hand I was dealt. No problem.

Am I to fail even at this tiny little goal?

Damn.

In this big world, my little problems don't mean a thing. Look at the other posts. Dead dogs, cancer, dogs killed by cancer. I am a lucky man. Right now I do not feel it.

Damn, and I must wait till Tuesday for my next class.

Damn.

[shellofmyformerself]

I PM'd you...

[Aspidistra]

Hey, I'd send you some SDMB Standard {{}}'s, except that you don't seem like a hugs kind of guy...

So I will say instead that if your course leader can't explain clearly in a way that you can understand, exactly what the problem was, and how you can do it better next time, it doesn't sound like she is much of a teacher.

Here's to a slightly wider margin of bullet-dodging next week

[Sticks and Scones]

It may not mean much to you, but I'm rooting for you... Always have been, actually. :)

[Paul in Qatar]

THank you all for your kindnesses. I am going to bed. I have a cold too.

[NinetyWt]

THank you all for your kindnesses. I am going to bed. I have a cold too. That always makes one feel worse.

I agree with Aspidastra - the instructor needs to tell you where you are coming up short. My money's on you, I think you will make it. :)

[Typo Knig]

Friggin' certification tests!

My advice (free! and not even worth that!): Get some rest, treat your cold, and then talk privately with your teacher(s) about how you can improve.

And if they don't give you helpful advice then give them a big wet sloppy kiss - while you still have rhinovirii to share!! :D

[Askance]

My tutor beet around the bush.I think I might have a clue as to your problem ... :)

No really, as others said you are entitled to a detailed explanation as to what your actual failing was. If you don't respect your assessor and don't agree with the outcome ... sadly your choices are to suck it up and do what she wants, no matter what, or fail it with your honour intact and find a better option.

[FriarTed]

Rooting here & I also have a cold. Also agree that your assessor needs to be able to tell you what the problem is & what you might try to remedy is.

Is Saudi that major a locale priority for you or how about any place you can teach English to Arabic students?

[purple haze]

You can do it, Paul. There's got to be a way to get through this successfully.

What do you think about videotaping yourself? You may want to take some time to practice someplace where you feel comfortable, and get some video. Maybe when you watch the replay something will jump out at you that can be improved on.

I agree that it would be very helpful to get specifics from your instructor, if you haven't already. No one is perfect the first time, and these things take practice.

Good luck. When in doubt, fart.

Just kidding. I wanted to make sure you were still reading my post. I hope your cold goes away soon.

[Khadaji]

I am not a teacher, so I cannot offer any advice, but I will offer a wish of luck for this upcoming next class.

[Quartz]

You'll do it, Paul! But do have a good long talk with her about the areas she feels you need to improve. Be sure to cast it in a positive light.

[Paul in Qatar]

OK, so I am batting cleanup on Monday, the last 40-minute class of the day. That ought to tell the tale. Time to start lesson planning.

[NinetyWt]

Maybe you should video a practice class, and let some people critique it? You could put it on YouTube.

[E-Sabbath]

When all else fails, add confidence and energy.

[Paul in Qatar]

This time Monday it will be decided. Either I pass the Monday class (and worry until Thursday) or I fail. Keep your fingers crossed.

[not_alice]

Wow.

"Not connecting" is teacher-admin code not for not knowing the material, but rather, not being good at conveying it or even worse, keeping people's interest while motivating them to learn.

Whatever holds your personality back, you are going to have to let it all go, at least for 72 hours.

Nothing wrong with putting on a show - you don't have to be the same person you are before or after that 40 minutes in order to connect. You didn't say what level the students are at (or if they are culturally similar to the ones in Saudi, a big issue in teaching English), but you are going to have to find the sweet spot between entertaining people with limited vocabulary and teaching a curriculum.

Good luck!

[Paul in Qatar]

Actually, they are low beginners. I rarely work at that level. Stranger, they are mostly Libyans. (Libyans in Denver?) One idea I am kicking around is that face with a bunch of Arabs, I snapped back into Saudi military instructor mode. It did not feel that way to me, but people reported I became some sort of Grammar Robot.

[The Second Stone]

A few months back there was a poster on this board who had lived in Saudi Arabia for several years and he was bemoaning how the bureaucracy was screwing him over and he would never get out of that hot and annoying country. I wish you could talk to him or look over his posts on how bad it was when he needed to leave. If only I could remember his user name I'd give it to you Paul In Saudi.

[Quartz]

Are these lessons recorded? It might be instructive to watch yourself.

[Sefton]

When it comes to connecting, I always find it helps to describe how I felt when I first learned the subject.

For example, I'd recommend something like this:
"I thought grammar was hard when I was your age, but after I learned x, y, and z, I realized it was really very easy..."

I wouldn't recommend:
"I have failed in love and carry those scars very, very deeply. Can any of you children tell me why God doesn't grant me the mercy killing I so richly deserve? OH GOD, WHY?"

Of course, tastes may differ.

[Critical1]

I dont know how much teaching background you have but keep in mind the students dont know what the lesson plan is or if you are just pulling it out of your arse, so if you make a minor mistake dont sweat it. some humor works really really well as long as it connects which I realize could be a major problem in a language class but if you can get a bit of a laugh out of them it makes everyone more relaxed.

[E-Sabbath]

It did not feel that way to me, but people reported I became some sort of Grammar Robot.

That's it. Add passion. not_alice is exactly correct. (Not currently a teacher: Mom was a teacher for most of my life, I was a sub-TA and the IT guy for a school district for a number of years) Add passion. Add life. Don't go too overboard, but add confidence to yourself, and engage, engage, engage with the class.

I'm not going to add any specifics here, because you know yourself, and you know how to do it, you know the culture. I know you're a good teacher, Paul, you just have to stop worrying and teach. Not educate, _teach_. Lead.

[The Batman]

Why don't you just teach English in another country if SA is being too demanding?

I'm sure other middle eastern countries have a high demand for English teachers. (I'm assuming that the reason you teach English in SA is because you speak Arabic)

[j666]

I came in here expecting another story about the gay Mexican(?) bar ...

Humor can do a lot for a class; if you have an abrupt or cold demeanor, can you try for a certain dead-pan humor? Maybe mixing up the vocabulary to make sentences like ... "My pink dress is on the table", "His small black cat drives your car" ... goofy stuff that would surprise them, especially with a straight delivery?

Good luck, and if everything goes horribly wrong, I'm sure there are plenty of places to go mad, and with better weather, too.

[Sunrazor]

Here's something that may help:

When you look at your class, teach each one individually for a few seconds. Look him or her in the eyes, talk directly to him or her, expect some kind of recognition from him or her. I was hard for me to do, but once I mastered it, my effectiveness as a teacher improved dramatically. The material should flow from you with no effort at all, leaving your conscious effort free to focus entirely on one person at a time.

Oh, and try to ignore the weather in the Mile High City. This time of year can plant thoughts of doom and gloom in a man's mind.

[E-Sabbath]

Don't do the goofy stuff if you don't think you can handle it right. That's the easiest way to screw up. Just a slight adjustment is all you need.

[Paul in Qatar]

All good advice.

Since the Saudi Embassy coughed up a furball when I tried to get back in without a CELTA, I have just accepted an offer from Qatar who do not seem as picky.

I will just do my best over the next few days, stay cool and not queer the deal in the event I need to take this fool course again. No reason to burn bridges behind oneself.

Thank you all. I will keep you posted.

[Paul in Qatar]

I passed Class #9 ! Good news, but of course it also means I have to get passed #10 on Wednesday. Then that's it.

Thank you all.

[gardentraveler]

Excellent! Congrats on passing and on the new job.

[Paul in Qatar]

I am faxing my stuff to Qatar. Time for a break from Saudi.

[Khadaji]

Congratulations! Good luck Wednesday! :)

[Sophistry and Illusion]

I am faxing my stuff to Qatar. Time for a break from Saudi.

Well, if you do wind up in Qatar, we can have a mini Dopefest!

[NinetyWt]

Yay Paul! Good luck on Wednesday, and good luck with the Qatar job.

[Shirley Ujest]

Since the Saudi Embassy coughed up a furball

Now that I would like to see!


Will you become Paul in Qatar now?

[Siam Sam]

Good luck!

But if worse comes to worst, I believe the name Paul in Cambodia is still available. (Of course, I doubt that would allow you to leave your nephews much.)

[Lust4Life]

I'm with you mate,we're all with you.

Keep you're chin up and hang on in there.

As to the love thing time DOES heal though it can take a lot longer in some cases.

[Sophistry and Illusion]

I passed Class #9 ! Good news, but of course it also means I have to get passed #10 on Wednesday. Then that's it.
So don't leave us in suspense. How did it turn out?

[Paul in Qatar]

1. I passed my CELTA!
2. I am drunk.
3. Hi Opal!
4. Good night.

[chacoguy]

Yay Paul!:D:cool:

[gardentraveler]

Awesome!

[Typo Knig]

1. I passed my CELTA!
2. I am drunk.
3. Hi Opal!
4. Good night.

5. through a zillion: Congratulations, Paul in Wherever the Heck You Want To Be!

[Siam Sam]

Congrats!

[purple haze]

Way to go! I knew you could do it!

[Indian]

1. I passed my CELTA!
2. I am drunk.
3. Hi Opal!
4. Good night.


Congrats ! Paul not in Saudi !

[China Guy]

cool dude

[Sophistry and Illusion]

Congratulations! So does this mean you are going back to Saudi after all, or are you still headed to Qatar?

[Paul in Qatar]

I would suppose Qatar. The pay is only a little less.

[Sophistry and Illusion]

Well, you can buy booze in Qatar. So there's that.