Son of the Return of More Things that Don't Make Sense, reboot IVb

[Lumpy]

1. Japanese Cat Girl's Ears: think about it for a second. Their cat ears are on top of their heads, because cat's ears are on the top of their heads. But that's because cats don't have a huge cerebrum ballooning way above their eyes. Both cats and humans have ears about the same level as their eyes; for cats that's at the top of their heads and for humans its on the sides of their heads. So do Japanese Cat Girls have their ear canals coming down from the tops of their heads? Are the cat ears purely cosmetic and their functional ears are hidden by their hair at the sides of their heads?

2. Beneath the Planet of the Apes. So the apes lived in about the only habitable area around, surrounded by the barren and probably toxic Forbidden Zone. We see a scene in the movie where the ape leaders are debating breaking the ancient prohibition against entering the Forbidden Zone, each for their own reasons: Zaius's fear that Taylor is proof that a colony of intelligent humans survives, General Urso responding to a garbled report from an outlying patrol of encountering something deep in the Zone. Both are concerned about the burgeoning ape population's need for food, and they come to the conclusion that if something is living out in the Forbidden Zone, then whatever it is, it has to eat. Indeed. In the midst of the Forbidden Zone, underneath the slagged remnants of a nuked city, live the Mutants. Only just what exactly do they eat- two thousand year old stores of K-rations?

[Ranchoth]

1. Japanese Cat Girl's Ears: think about it for a second. Their cat ears are on top of their heads, because cat's ears are on the top of their heads. But that's because cats don't have a huge cerebrum ballooning way above their eyes. Both cats and humans have ears about the same level as their eyes; for cats that's at the top of their heads and for humans its on the sides of their heads. So do Japanese Cat Girls have their ear canals coming down from the tops of their heads? Are the cat ears purely cosmetic and their functional ears are hidden by their hair at the sides of their heads?

This gets even worse when you consider the size of the eyes (funny fact to look for: in a lot of Japanese-animated western cartoons, even ones that use American-style character designs, check out any skulls that appear...often, the eye sockets are abnormally large, as would be appropriate for most anime-style characters!).

[Koxinga]

I'm only to the end of Season 3 of Lost, so perhaps some things start to make sense later. But for now: whooo, boy.

(Please don't spoil anything for me.)

[Superhal]

Why do horrible actors like Jack Black and Lindsey Lohan keep getting work?

[Rhythmdvl]

In Total Recall, up on Mars, where you really really don't want to break a window, why is there a fire axe in the room of the last scene?

Oh wait ... maybe he never went to mars in the first place and it was a hallucination after all.

Why did they cancel Arrested Development?

[CalMeacham]

Beneath the Planet of the Apes. So the apes lived in about the only habitable area around, surrounded by the barren and probably toxic Forbidden Zone. We see a scene in the movie where the ape leaders are debating breaking the ancient prohibition against entering the Forbidden Zone, each for their own reasons: Zaius's fear that Taylor is proof that a colony of intelligent humans survives, General Urso responding to a garbled report from an outlying patrol of encountering something deep in the Zone. Both are concerned about the burgeoning ape population's need for food, and they come to the conclusion that if something is living out in the Forbidden Zone, then whatever it is, it has to eat. Indeed. In the midst of the Forbidden Zone, underneath the slagged remnants of a nuked city, live the Mutants. Only just what exactly do they eat- two thousand year old stores of K-rations?

As I've complained before, none of the Planet of the Apes movies make a lick of sense. Having Food problems? Shut down the damned museum and stop the Chimp research subsidies!

What do the Mutants eat? Heck, what do the Mutants do all day? Who washes and irons their perfect robes? Howcum the well-preserved sections of New York City haven't been long ago picked over for usable parts? Why aren't there paths worn through well-traveled areas?



Or, in the first movie, imagine if they'd found a slightly different talking toy at the Dig.

Taylor: There's your proof, Dr. Zaius! If apes hadn't descended from fish, would they have made a Singing Billy Bass that TALKS??

[Beware of Doug]

Why do horrible actors like Jack Black and Lindsey Lohan keep getting work?Lindsay Lohan is "getting work"? Does this work involve climbing into strange men's cars?

[Lamia]

This gets even worse when you consider the size of the eyes (funny fact to look for: in a lot of Japanese-animated western cartoons, even ones that use American-style character designs, check out any skulls that appear...often, the eye sockets are abnormally large, as would be appropriate for most anime-style characters!).I don't know that I've ever seen an anime skull, but actual human skulls (http://www.gwc.maricopa.edu/class/bio201/skull/antskul.htm) do have eye sockets much bigger than the part of the eye that's visible when someone still has skin on their face.

[Ronald C. Semone]

The thing that always bothered me about the Ape movies was the fact that in a primative agrarian society the soldiers carried automatic weapons. Where did they get them? If you stop to think about it, it requires a fairly sophisticated industrial base to manufacture such weapons.

The same thing bothered me about the Terminator movies. Where in the future did the human survivors get their sophisticated weapons?

[CalMeacham]

The thing that always bothered me about the Ape movies was the fact that in a primative agrarian society the soldiers carried automatic weapons. Where did they get them? If you stop to think about it, it requires a fairly sophisticated industrial base to manufacture such weapons.

Eactly the kind of thing that I complained about in the earlier thread I mention above.


The real reason, of course, is that, in Rod Serling's original script, the Ape society was essentially like Earth society circa 1968, with the same technological level. But they wanted an eerie atmosphere (and didn't have the really big bucks or technology to create a truly big urban society), so they created a much smaller society, not worrying about the fact that it made nary a bit of sense. Bothered me, though, even as a kid. Where the hell did they get the bucks and space for a modern-looking museum? Who the hell made all that glass? Who, for that matter, made the metal bars for the cages -- he never saw an iron mill or a forge.

[furryman]

1. Japanese Cat Girl's Ears: think about it for a second. Their cat ears are on top of their heads, because cat's ears are on the top of their heads. But that's because cats don't have a huge cerebrum ballooning way above their eyes. Both cats and humans have ears about the same level as their eyes; for cats that's at the top of their heads and for humans its on the sides of their heads. So do Japanese Cat Girls have their ear canals coming down from the tops of their heads? Are the cat ears purely cosmetic and their functional ears are hidden by their hair at the sides of their heads?

I dare you to name any cartoon that makes sense.

Many years ago there was a complaint about the fact that Omaha the Cat Dancer wore what looked like ear rings. The artist explained that they were actually decorations that clipped onto her hair.

[Lemur866]

The same thing bothered me about the Terminator movies. Where in the future did the human survivors get their sophisticated weapons?

They got their weapons from the Terminators. And from stuff the Connors stashed in preparation for Judgement Day. If you mean the plasma rifles and so on, well, they were built by SkyNet. Probably from plans that SkyNet sent back in time, so that the earlier version of SkyNet would know how to build plasma rifles.

[Intergalactic Gladiator]

Why do horrible actors like Jack Black and Lindsey Lohan keep getting work?

Lohan was a great actor before her trainwreck. Her performances in Freaky Friday and Mean Girls were really good.

Jack Black is funny, I think, but he also has to be controlled. He's never going to be a character actor who loses himself in a part, but a good director with a good script could possibly keep him focused.

What are sitcom husbands all fat and stupid and their wives sexy?

[Justin_Bailey]

What are sitcom husbands all fat and stupid and their wives sexy?

Because a lot of those couples exist in real life?

[RealityChuck]

Because a lot of those couples exist in real life?Yes. Especially when the man is a TV producer.

[PatriotGrrrl]

The thing that always bothered me about the Ape movies was the fact that in a primative agrarian society the soldiers carried automatic weapons. Where did they get them? If you stop to think about it, it requires a fairly sophisticated industrial base to manufacture such weapons.


No it doesn't. There are plenty of AK-47's made in tiny Mom-and-Pop gun shops in Afghanistan, using only hand tools.

[Ronald C. Semone]

No it doesn't. There are plenty of AK-47's made in tiny Mom-and-Pop gun shops in Afghanistan, using only hand tools.

The weapons the apes were carrying around were not made in a mom and pop gun shop. (And in any case, those mom and pop gun shops couldn't assemble an AK-47 with out getting the component pieces from a more industrial economy.)

[silenus]

What are sitcom husbands all fat and stupid and their wives sexy?

Hey! We resemble that remark!

[Chimera]

Incredibly Advanced Lost Scifi Colonies with Ridiculously Small Populations.

So...After being lost for 200 years, there's still only a couple of hundred of them.

But they have all manner of different clothes, tools, new equipment, a wide variety of food stuffs, working computers, et al.

So who is making this stuff or where are they buying it from? Because a colony of a couple of hundred people all off on their own just doesn't have the manpower for all this crap. Nor are they going to have all the different required elements and resources immediately available and readily convertible for their needs.

[Chimera]

Villains who want to blow up/destroy the world.

They've finally realized this is stupid. As Lex Luthor says, "I live there and all my stuff is there."

[KneadToKnow]

Lohan was a great actor before her trainwreck. Her performances in Freaky Friday and Mean Girls were really good.

Suddenly, I don't feel so bad about realizing at age 19 I was a has-been.

[MrSquishy]

Jack Black is funny, I think, but he also has to be controlled. He's never going to be a character actor who loses himself in a part, but a good director with a good script could possibly keep him focused.Yeah, I always thought he was pretty good in High Fidelity. He was playing Jack Black, but not crazy Jack Black. I liked Be Kind, Rewind too.

[Maiira]

I was rewatching Lord of the Rings recently, and something that continues to bug me is the the Battle of Helm's Deep. They whined about not having enough young, strong people, then they wouldn't let the women fight. Why? Eowyn made it pretty clear that Rohan women were made of tougher stuff, and they made it sound as though they didn't have anything to lose; why not let the women fight? It's not even a matter of "teh wimminz iz weak!", either; they were already scraping the bottom of the proverbial barrel by having old men and young kids fight. Any woman would be at least as strong as a 12-year-old boy or a 70-year-old man.

Even a "we need women for reproduction!" argument doesn't seem to work, here...if all the men are dead, and the Uruk-hai aren't planning on letting the women live either, reproduction and repopulation are kind of a moot point. And if it's childcare you need, you've got old women for that.

This isn't really meant to be a complaint about the lack of equality between men and women; Rohan is clearly a patriarchal society, and within the realm of the story, I'm perfectly okay with that. I just think it ignored or overlooked a rather large potential asset.

(Also, to be fair, I don't think it was necessarily bad storytelling on Tolkien's part--rather, it was just Theoden being stubborn and relying too much on tradition.)

[KneadToKnow]

Even a "we need women for reproduction!" argument doesn't seem to work, here...if all the men are dead, and the Uruk-hai aren't planning on letting the women live either, reproduction and repopulation are kind of a moot point.

Yes, but only if all the men are dead. It wouldn't work long-term at a genetic level, but one man could do a pretty thorough job of knocking up a whole mess of chicks.

Personally, I think that's the whole idea: it allows every man going into battle to fight like he might be the only one who's going to survive and thus become sovereign to a nation of lonely poontang.

[TBG]

Middle Earth predates wimmin's lib by a few millennia, ya know.

[Sailboat]

No it doesn't. There are plenty of AK-47's made in tiny Mom-and-Pop gun shops in Afghanistan, using only hand tools.

When AK-47s are widely available for very little money -- aren't they produced in staggering numbers? -- why would you need to make one in a Mom-and-Pop shop when you could buy a few hundred with half an acre of poppies?

[Rocketeer]

... it allows every man going into battle to fight like he might be the only one who's going to survive and thus become sovereign to a nation of lonely poontang.

I never thought of it that way before....:dubious: