Does size matter or not?

[nhaerens]

Does the size of a man's penis (length and/or width) really matter to a woman? If so, why and if not, why not? (simply put)

[Frankie]

I was gonna ask the same thing today!

And please correct me if I am wrong but you are assuming all other factors being equal?

The last part I want to know is how big is too big?

[manhattan]

So who wants to start a pool on whether this is gonna end up in MPSIMS or Great Debates?

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Livin' on Tums, Vitamin E and Rogaine

[funneefarmer]

Is it even debateable? MPSIMS

[kellibelli]

it is not funny, my first husband was very small, and unfortunately, my son has inherited this...women can be cruel.

my ex was good at other stuff, and when my son is a teen, I'll get him a book or something on technique.

too big?...well bigger than the womans wrist is too big, and too long if she chokes when you are shagging.

[BurnMeUp]

what do you consider very small? are we talking pinky size?

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To deal with men by force is as impractical as to deal with nature by persuasion.

[c-man]

I've always kinda thought this was a dumb question. Saying that size matters to a woman is like asking a man if he likes women who have a big ass:

Some women like long ones or thick ones. Other women find them uncomfortable and would prefer medium to smaller ones. Some women don't care 'cause they prefer external stimulation.

Bottom line: Size may matter - it depends on the woman.

What would be nice is if women had their preferences stamped on their forehead.

c-man

[c-man]

oops - looks like I can't use an underline tag. Sorry.

c-man

[Satan]

This question was brought up before...

Women generally replied: "Duh! But there are ways around it."

Men overwhelmingly replied: "I'm really big, but here is what I've heard..."

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Brian O'Neill
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[Persephone]

Here's my perspective, as a woman with a (pretty fun) past...

Size doesn't matter, to me. I've been with huge & tiny, and they both have their pros & cons. One thing I have noticed, though, is that the REALLY big guys tend not to pay as much attention to technique, assuming that their size will be enough. Wrongo, buddy boy. The smaller guys (under 6 inches) tend to be more technically skilled, perhaps thinking that their size may not be enough. Thickness does help a little, though, from a strictly physical standpoint. But there's more than one way to make a woman "enjoy herself," if you will. Size becomes pretty unimportant if you're having an incredibly good time doing all the other stuff that goes along with having sex. Hey, if you're good with your fingers & tongue, whether or not you've got a penis at all becomes unimportant ;)

[Suzeanne]

Size matters ... but not in the way most people seem to think. It's dependant on both the man and the woman.

For starters, oh yes, there's such a thing as too small. A penis that is less than 3 inches fully erect can have problems impregnanting their partner. For a small woman with narrow hips, especially one that's never given birth, this problem is lessened.

Men can definitely be way too big -- for some women. Others prefer it. Take that same itty bitty woman, and give her an overendowed male. Congrats, you've got the perfect combination for damage and increased instances of PID.

Just have to find the perfect fit for you.

I've never noticed size when a man is inside of me - it feels pretty consistent. Vaginas strech to accomodate any size.

In my experience, size matters most during a blowjob. It's frustrating and hard to suck a large penis (gag reflex, not being able to cover all the sensitive areas, etc), but it's easy and fun with a small penis.

[funneefarmer]

Cecil covered sizes in one of his first books, although now I can't remember which. Seem to remember that average was between 5"-6" erect. It had record lengths as well in the piece. Now I'm going to have to go back and find it.

[handy]

First thing I read about size was when I was probably 11, it was a book, EVERYTHING YOU ALWAYS WANTED TO KNOW ABOUT SEX BUT WERE AFRAID TO ASK. And the guy said, 'big enough to get in a woman's vagina and deposit semen without spilling....'

[AuraSeer]

I've been told that it's girth that matters more for overall sensation, and that length only needs to be within a certain range (i.e., long enough to reach the sensitive spot(s), but not so long as to be painful).

And that's all I have to say about that.

[Czarcasm]

You know, if you're doing it right, she(or he)should be 9/10's of the way there by the time you do any inserting.

[elbow]

Two shorts notes:

It's not the sword,
it's the swordsman.

and, of course:

It's not the size of the tide,
it's the motion of the ocean.

Gee, I think that sums it up nicely.

[Satan]

Elbows:

Spoken like a man with a small penis!

(I'm only kidding...)

[nhaerens]

Or what about

It's not the size of the dick that does the trick, but the throb of the knob that does the job.

My wife says it's girth in her case and that the back of the vagina (way back) is not very sensitive. And in her case, by the time we do it, she's been ready and passed 10/10; before that she doesn't feel like it...
What I read and surprised me is that most guys who get their penis enlarged do it so that it will look bigger in its flacid state in the locker room, to impress other guys.
One woman's response to that was: 'It if works, don't mess with it'
The difference between soft and erect is larger (no pun intended) when the penis retracts more in its resting stage (taking a much deserved break from the demands of the world ;-)

[Camilla]

Isn't this is like wondering what is the right size for breasts or a vagina? Just be happy with what you and your partner have, keep 'em clean, and use 'em often.

[handy]

If a woman has a tight vagina, a small penis is fine. If a woman has a loose vagina, a bigger penis is fine. There is no set answer to this question. Surely a too short penis race would not be here today.

Speaking of size, remember when we talked about where the gene was for it?

[phouka]

Size does matter. Up to a point. That goes for both men and women.

Penises (penii?) come large and small, wide and narrow.

Vaginas come deep and shallow, tight and loose.

The only thing I worry about is making sure he's not so big that he tears me up (it has happened). If there's any doubt, he gets lots of nice warm lube, and we take it extra slow.

I do my bit by practising Kegel exercises, and I have gotten compliments for it.

So long as he hits the three inch mark but not the eight inch mark, I'm a pretty happy gal.

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"I'm surprised that you've never been told before, that you're lovely, that you're perfect, and that somebody wants you." - Semisonic, f.n.p

[jane_says]

In my opinion, size matters, but probably only psychologically. My husband is big, and it tok a while to get used to it. But the fact of the matter is that the inside of a vagina in relatively insensitive. If this were not so, childbirth would be unbearable. Nerve endings in this area are sparse in comparison to the clitoris and labia.
I do agree, however, that large guys seem to replace real effort with ego, whereas a mediocre-weenied guy will work his heart out.

[pluto]

Maybe this belongs in the Weird Plurals thread but --

Penises (penii?) come large and small, wide and narrow.

The preferred plural is penes.

(So is a single vagina a [i]vaginum[/]?)

This reminds me of a time when I was working for an engineering firm. This was before computer-aided drafting so we used drafting pens filled with India ink. When they would get clogged or dirty we would go to the restroom and rinse them out. If you didn't clean up after yourself this left black puddles on the sink which annoyed the custodians. So one day they put up a sign that said "Please don't clean your pens in the sink!". It took about 30 seconds before someone added an 'i'.


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"non sunt multiplicanda entia praeter necessitatem"
-- William of Ockham

[OpalCat]

Size, eh? Hmmm... I agree with the blow job response. It is MUCH nicer to "perform" on someone with an average-to-small penis. Also, as has been said, it is hard to tell the size once it is inside. The inside of the vagina is even less sensitive than the inside of your cheek.

Overall I think 4 to 6 inches is ideal.

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[funneefarmer]

I was wrong, the average size that Cecil quoted was 6"+

Here's the link http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a2_193.html

[Big Iron]

[[In my experience, size matters most during a blowjob. It's frustrating and hard to suck a large penis ]] Melanie


Sheesh, woman ... practice, practice, practice. ;)

[handy]

funneefarmer, that may be so but Masters & Johnson, who also came to that size, said they measure an erect penis by measuring it just before orgasm.

Cecil did not state how he did the measuring part, other than from the top, but when?

[funneefarmer]

Cecil was quoting Kinsey's data, he did no measuring, or at least that is the way I read it. He only said to measure from the top because, my guess here, that is the way Kinsey did the measuring.

[Pete]

The reason you measure from the top is obvious: it's longer on the top. Remember, men came up with the guidelines for measuring penises.

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I don't know who first said "everyone's a critic," but I think it's a really stupid saying.

[JoltSucker]

Melanie's observation about moderate-sized penes (that's the plural for penis, right?) being best for blow jobs doesn't jibe with some conversations I had with an ex-carpool mate of mine.

We talked about all sorts of frank things that men and women don't usually talk about (except in anonymous forums such as this). She was on her second marriage, married to a prude, but her first husband was anything but prudish. I got the feeling that she had a colorful sexual history, and if we hadn't been faithfully been married to other folks, I get the feeling she would have been happy to teach me a thing or two........

OK, I'm back from my reverie. In one conversation, when I said that I heard that size didn't really matter, the said "Oh YES IT DOES!!!!". Since I weigh in at 5.5" on a good day, I immediately felt like a pinkie-dick. In another conversation, I expressed frustration that my wife feels that men just want blow jobs to be dominant, and I wondered if ANY woman out there actually likes to give them. Her response: She raised her hand and said "I do". I told her what a lucky SOB her husband was, and she went on to explain that he wouldn't let her do that to him. The rest of the ride home was uncomfortable, with me trying to will my erection away....

So anyway, perhaps some women like to suck on Kielbasa, some like Vienna Sausages, and some don't like it at all. I'm very average in length, yet I've managed to bump my wife's cervix (so she says). The bottom line is that it's "different strokes for different folks", and how you use what you've got.

[handy]

It's not longer on the top Pete, its longer on the bottom at least for most guys, I would hope so... Just follow it down into the start of it, wow, just think, just gained another three inches.

Also, Cecil, as usual, did not say if they used a straight ruler or a cloth one, in which case, the cloth one you gain another half inch, believe it or not, give it a shot.

Wow, now Im over 11 inches and counting. NOw if I could just keep my focus before orgasm, I would surely be around 12". lol.

[BunnyGirl]

ROFLMAO!!!
Poor Handy! Being teased about such a sensitive issue!

[Omniscient]

Well, I'd have to say that handy isn't the goofy one. Petes got some issues. I always get a kick out of the porn sites where the women brag about their bf's or preference for 12" and up penes. I'm just thinking of some guys measuring with a couple of inches of that tape measure up his ass.

[Pete]

So, omniscient, you're saying that men aren't supposed to have scrotums?

Where do you come from? Are you from the same planet handy is from? Are your genitals put on upside-down there?

[Omniscient]

Um, a penis when erect is at around a 45 degree angle (give or take). Therefore the top, where the penis makes an acute angle with the body is going to be shorter than the bottom by the thickness of the penis. The testes, while not firmly anchored, are typically located below the penis, not anchored to the shaft like a reel on a fishing rod. You maybe different, but i was just pointing out for handy's sake that most men (gathered from personal experience and careful study of porn) are longer from the bottom. You can stop being defensive now.

[Pete]

Mine is about an inch and a half longer on top, because the scrotum gets in the way on the bottom.

Am I a freak? Is the scrotum not supposed to be there? It is in all the health/medical texts I've seen.

Maybe you're the odd one, handy.

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I don't know who first said "everyone's a critic," but I think it's a really stupid saying.

[funneefarmer]

I think handy may be measuring from the buttcheeks.

[handy]

Pete, what is your scrotum made of? Mine is made of skin, and being such, it can be pushed to the side a little to allow measurement.

A penis is not a baseball bat, it's anchored inside the body at least mine is :-)

[Steelwhip]

Looks like there is a need for a universal penis measurement system possibly based on ratio of length and girth... kinda like a tire.

[Pete]

Omniscient, you can stop pretending you know everything (uh...wait a minute)...

You're talking about the side. Not the direct bottom. And erection angles widely vary. You can easily straighten, it, no matter what the angle.

handy, you can't count the part on the inside.

steelwhip, why not the volume?

Formula (roughly for a cylinder): circumfrence times length.

[funneefarmer]

First we have boob geometry, now we have penile geometry. Volume is a good general measurement I suppose, but at which point do you measure the circumference?

[handy]

Steelwhip, use weight. Yep, to measure breasts and penises, just weigh them. Dunno how they are gonna weigh an erect one.

[vanillanice]

I guess the only accurate way to answer this is to get opinions fromwomen who have been with large men,and also average ones. I see Heather Locklear and Pamela Lee would the the ones to ask.