"Every now and then you come across somebody you shouldn't have F***ed with

[Scylla]

Well I'm that guy."

Do you remember that quote? I thought it was pretty good when Clint Eastwood said it in El Torino.

Clearly it's difficult to match Clint Eastwood, but did you ever have a similar moment?


I was in Ocean City, and I took my daughter to get Dippin Dots. As we were crossing the street, this Jeep sped up and swerved towards us and a redheaded kid stuck his head out the window and yelled "Get the fuck out of the way"

My daughter stared with wide frightened eyes, and I looked after the Jeep, filled with that impotent rage you get when this kind of thing happens.

Then, something funny happened. About four blocks down, the Jeep made a right turn. Since we were a block off the boardwalk I presumed they were turning into their hotel.

"Let's take a walk honey."

We walk down to the hotel, and I see the Jeep parked. So, what do I do? I call 911 and I tell them just what happened. The dispatcher tells me to wait while they send out a unit.

My daughter and I are sitting on a bench near the boardwalk, about 20 yards from the Jeep. The kids come out and start unloading the Jeep (truthfully, they don't look like kids now, mid twenties or such.) We are sitting there, eating our dippin' dots and the redheaded kid that yelled notices us. You can tell that it's one of those things, where he's not sure it's us, but it makes him nervous.

I smile and wave.

He ignores me, they unload their stuff and go up to their room. When the police show up we tell the story again. The Police are not amused over what occured and they get the room number from the front desk, and go to pay a little visit to the kids.

My daughter and I finish our ice cream and leave. We didn't bother to stay to see what happened. In my mind, I could see them opening the door and seeing the policeman standing there.... and that was enough.

It's funny, but one of the things that pissed me off was that back when I was a kid, and we did something unspeakable or bad.... we kept going. These idiots just pulled into their hotel and stopped.

Yeah, I know, not Clint Eastwood, but not bad for a guy with a handful of Dippin Dots either.

[Qadgop the Mercotan]

Bravo.

One of my patients threatened one of my nurses recently.

He's in the segregation unit now. From there he may go to supermax.

You do not f**k with my nurses.

[Ambivalid]

I know of a certain (former) Mickey D's employee who had a similar moment. :eek:

[pullin]

The short version:

1. Drunk driver hits the "pullin family truckster".

2. I make him my hobby for the next few years (legal stuff ensues; people in suits using fun words like "garnishment").

3. Drunk driver's financial house of cards collapses (unexpected bonus).

4. Drunk driver loses wife (had enough of his shit).

5. Drunk driver loses home (is evicted by deputies).

6. Suits inform me drunk driver last seen living under downtown bridge. :D


Liquor bottles should come with a picture of my truck on the label; And a warning that says, "Don't hit him."

[Cryptic C62]

I was on the other side of this once. One summer day, my best friend Snakeford and I went to meet up with some chums to play soccer on the fields near our high school. As we got closer to the school, we saw adult male human wearing a bright yellow shirt running along the side of the road. I rolled down my window, Snakeford slowed the car down to a crawl, and we both yelled as loud as we could at right at the guy. No words, just "AAAAAAAH!".

Yellow shirt guy freaked the fuck out. We'd scared plenty of people of people before this, but I've never seen anything like this. He started screaming his head off and flipping the bird and running down the middle of the street to try to catch up to us. We were about to turn into the school's driveway when I noticed that he was still chasing us. I said "Shit, keep driving!"

We drove off to some sidestreet and hid for a few minutes. Then we made our way back to the fields. Yellow guy must have noticed when we had our turn signal on, as he was waiting behind the sign next to the entrance! As soon as we got close, he started chasing after us again. Eventually, with the help of the other entrance, we managed to juke him out and play some soccer, but we saw him running up and down the driveway, probably looking to beat the shit out of us or key Snakeford's car. Whoops!

[Heart of Dorkness]

Oh, mine is so, so minor, I'm almost too embarrassed to share it.

Almost, but not quite. :D

A couple of years ago, my husband and I went out to a club in DC to celebrate New Year's Eve. It was still early, but it was pretty packed, because everyone wanted to stake out their "spot" for the countdown. We were standing watching a band perform, and we were crammed up next to some couches, where folks were vying for any tiny bit of real estate they could find on the seat, the arm, or the back. I was aware of a little shouting going on, though it was hard to tell because it was so loud. Then, suddenly, a guy in front of me reached past me, pushing me aside so he could shove the guy behind me. I realized I was about to be in the middle of a fight.

I have no idea what possessed me, but in a split-second, I squared myself off between them, pushing them as far away from each other as the crowd would allow, and shouted at the top of my lungs, "Oh, HELL no! You are NOT doing this in here. If you want to beat the crap out of each other, you can go outside and do it on the street. But not with ME in the middle." I am not physically imposing by any stretch of the imagination - 5'9'', 140, obviously no muscles to speak of, and I was wearing a cocktail dress, to boot - but I can be extremely loud, and apparently, it worked. Both guys stepped back. Then one guy's girlfriend pointed to the other girlfriend and whined to me, "But she was pushing me..." and I cut her off: "I know. I don't care. Take it outside." Then, I calmly turned around to my husband (who was staring at me, clearly thinking, "Who are you, and what have you done with my wife?" and also, "You're going to get us killed!") and resumed watching the band. The guys and their girlfriends all stayed, and left each other alone the rest of the night. I didn't have to tell them twice.

As a woman, this is probably the baddest-ass thing I will ever do.

[JacobSwan]

I had a part time job in a pizza parlour back during my student days. One saturday night the franchise owners came in and took 4 of us part timers out back for a chat. Business wasn't good and they didn't need us any more, oh and they couldn't afford to pay us more than half of what we were owed for that week. They were hoping that a bunch of students wouldn't kick up a fuss over £35 or so each.

I mentioned what had happened to a friend of mine and this is when the fun started. It turned out that his dad owned the building and was their landlord. They were 2 months behind with the rent and giving every excuse in the book. Once my friends father heard what had happened he decided to call time on their bullshit.

Losing £35 was worth it for getting to sit outside in my car and watch while a locksmith changed the locks on Monday morning. And then watch the franchisees panic an hour later when they couldn't open up.

[billfish678]

Yeah, I know, not Clint Eastwood, but not bad for a guy with a handful of Dippin Dots either.

I know what you're thinking punk. Did I eat 6 Dots or 7? I don't know either. But you gotta ask yourself "do you feel lucky?". Well, punk, do ya?

Thanks, that was funny and sweet justice. And, if the police had bothered to look they might have found some security cam somewhere and depending on how much swerving they did those punks could have been in a world of legal shit.

[not what you'd expect]

Oh, mine is so, so minor, I'm almost too embarrassed to share it.

Almost, but not quite. :D

A couple of years ago, my husband and I went out to a club in DC to celebrate New Year's Eve. It was still early, but it was pretty packed, because everyone wanted to stake out their "spot" for the countdown. We were standing watching a band perform, and we were crammed up next to some couches, where folks were vying for any tiny bit of real estate they could find on the seat, the arm, or the back. I was aware of a little shouting going on, though it was hard to tell because it was so loud. Then, suddenly, a guy in front of me reached past me, pushing me aside so he could shove the guy behind me. I realized I was about to be in the middle of a fight.

I have no idea what possessed me, but in a split-second, I squared myself off between them, pushing them as far away from each other as the crowd would allow, and shouted at the top of my lungs, "Oh, HELL no! You are NOT doing this in here. If you want to beat the crap out of each other, you can go outside and do it on the street. But not with ME in the middle." I am not physically imposing by any stretch of the imagination - 5'9'', 140, obviously no muscles to speak of, and I was wearing a cocktail dress, to boot - but I can be extremely loud, and apparently, it worked. Both guys stepped back. Then one guy's girlfriend pointed to the other girlfriend and whined to me, "But she was pushing me..." and I cut her off: "I know. I don't care. Take it outside." Then, I calmly turned around to my husband (who was staring at me, clearly thinking, "Who are you, and what have you done with my wife?" and also, "You're going to get us killed!") and resumed watching the band. The guys and their girlfriends all stayed, and left each other alone the rest of the night. I didn't have to tell them twice.

As a woman, this is probably the baddest-ass thing I will ever do.

Awesome. I love this story. I'd love to hear the version of this story from the want to be fighters side. Actually, they probably wouldn't tell the story, but if they did, I bet your gender, weight, height and amount of muscles would change a lot.

Roar, I am woman!

[Gyrate]

I'm having a real problem reconciling "badass" and "Dippin' Dots" in the same story.

I have no badass stories. My wife, however, has broken a purse snatcher's ankle and damaged (if not broken) a creepy molestor-type's toes. She also filmed an assault on a bus driver well enough to convict the assailants (the on-bus CCTV is completely useless in this regard). She's a one-woman crimefightin' machine.

[Hampshire]

A few years back we got invited to a birthday party for the 5y.o. daughter of a woman my wife is friends with at work. It was at their house which we had never been to before so we were watching road signs trying to get there.
Apparently we were driving too slow as a pickup truck with a scrawny redneck guy and his clan whipped around us with the guy hanging out the window yelling "Get off the road Asshole!"
He never got out of view as we drove and we started to notice that the turns we were making were following him. Ended up he was going to the same party we were and he was the woman's brother-in-law. He was already out his car and looked nervous as I pulled up then looked really uncomfortable when he saw we also had a wrapped present. My wife begged me not to make a scene and I told her "Don't worry, I won't say a word."
Instead I spent most of the next 2 hours making him really uncomfortable. I would just stare at him across the room and he would never look at me even though he could tell I was staring at him. I walked directly toward him at one point while he fidgeted then turned and stood directly next to him while the kids were singing 'happy birthday'. I even found him in the basement with the other guys watching football and sat right next to him on the sofa. He moved within 5 minutes. Basically gave him a nervous two hours wondering when I was going to confront him which I never did.
Then the party was over and we went home.

[Autolycus]

"Dippin Dots" are actually quite badass, because they stick to your tongue and cause quite more pain than your average ice cream.

[Vinyl Turnip]

I'm just amazed that there's a city where you can call the police over something like that and they actually show up.

[Machine Elf]

A few years back we got invited to a birthday party for the 5y.o. daughter of a woman my wife is friends with at work. It was at their house which we had never been to before so we were watching road signs trying to get there.
Apparently we were driving too slow as a pickup truck with a scrawny redneck guy and his clan whipped around us with the guy hanging out the window yelling "Get off the road Asshole!"
He never got out of view as we drove and we started to notice that the turns we were making were following him. Ended up he was going to the same party we were and he was the woman's brother-in-law. He was already out his car and looked nervous as I pulled up then looked really uncomfortable when he saw we also had a wrapped present. My wife begged me not to make a scene and I told her "Don't worry, I won't say a word."
Instead I spent most of the next 2 hours making him really uncomfortable. I would just stare at him across the room and he would never look at me even though he could tell I was staring at him. I walked directly toward him at one point while he fidgeted then turned and stood directly next to him while the kids were singing 'happy birthday'. I even found him in the basement with the other guys watching football and sat right next to him on the sofa. He moved within 5 minutes. Basically gave him a nervous two hours wondering when I was going to confront him which I never did.
Then the party was over and we went home.

Well played, sir; that's a nice cold dish of revenge you served up there. :D I salute your sense of self-restraint and decorum.

On the flip-side, it's pretty sad that he never saw fit to apologize for losing his cool in the first place - especially given that he had two hours' worth of opportunities to do so.

[Dogzilla]

Major nitpick: I'm sorry, but Dippin' Dots is in no way, and does not remotely resemble, in any way, actual ice cream. You did not finish your ice cream. You finished your Dippin' Dots.

Minor nitpick: Shouting at pedestrians while driving by is rude, but hardly "unspeakable." Swerving toward pedestrians (who, presumably, had the right of way) is dangerous and probably illegal. But unspeakable? I don't think so.

That is all.

[Nzinga, Seated]

I was a teenager, drunk at 3:00 am at a Chinese restaurant. My best friend was bickering back and forth with a cross-dressing prostitute about who was next in line to order.

The cross dressing prostitute warned her, "You better shut the fuck up, honey, or you gonna get hurt". I waltzed up to her and said, "You aint gonna do shit."

Next thing I knew we were all tearing the place up, slamming into tables, knocking into walls. And I staggared to my feet when the fight was over to notice that my blouse was ballooning out in a very peculiar way. Turns out the hooker had sliced my shoulder open with a box cutter and my shirt was filling with blood. Hours later, in the hospital with an oxygen mask on my face, helping me to breath, I realized that sometimes, when someone tells you that you are fucking with wrong one, you really are fucking with the wrong one.

I have a scorpian shaped scar on my shoulder that to this day reminds me to never start no shit. Finish it if you must, but never start.

[howye]

Bravo.

One of my patients threatened one of my nurses recently.

He's in the segregation unit now. From there he may go to supermax.

You do not f**k with my nurses.

You are almost certainly going to win this contest.

[billfish678]

.

I have a scorpian shaped scar on my shoulder that to this day reminds me to never start no shit. Finish it if you must, but never start.

:eek:

Boy, you got lucky. Then again I am about as unstreet smart as it gets and even I know the only proper response to a cross dressing prostitute is "you first mam" :)

[Annie-Xmas]

Light turns green. I start crossing the street. Car makes a right turn with no signal, damn near hitting me. Apparently he didn't notice two cars behind him was a cop car. Guy gets pulled over and cop issues a ticket.

Did I mention I was wearing a full arm cast at the time?

[tdn]

Light turns green. I start crossing the street. Car makes a right turn with no signal, damn near hitting me. Apparently he didn't notice two cars behind him was a cop car. Guy gets pulled over and cop issues a ticket.

I was driving home with a friend late one night when a car, presumably full of teenagers, passed us illegally and at great speed. I guess they didn't notice that the car right behind them was a cop car. Busted!

[miss elizabeth]

I was a teenager, drunk at 3:00 am at a Chinese restaurant. My best friend was bickering back and forth with a cross-dressing prostitute about who was next in line to order.

The cross dressing prostitute warned her, "You better shut the fuck up, honey, or you gonna get hurt". I waltzed up to her and said, "You aint gonna do shit."

Next thing I knew we were all tearing the place up, slamming into tables, knocking into walls. And I staggared to my feet when the fight was over to notice that my blouse was ballooning out in a very peculiar way. Turns out the hooker had sliced my shoulder open with a box cutter and my shirt was filling with blood. Hours later, in the hospital with an oxygen mask on my face, helping me to breath, I realized that sometimes, when someone tells you that you are fucking with wrong one, you really are fucking with the wrong one.

I have a scorpian shaped scar on my shoulder that to this day reminds me to never start no shit. Finish it if you must, but never start.

I fucking love this post. It should be printed up and given to middle schoolers. Sage advice.

[miss elizabeth]

Oh! I have a story that only a little bit fits, but it's great so I'm posting it.

A few years ago the SO and I went to the grocery store, and were walking towards the entrance. As we walked through the parking lot, we saw a car with two middle age women waiting while a car backed out so they could pull into the spot. As soon as the car backing out got clear, a car being driven by a cocky teenager flew up and drove into the spot; stealing the spot from the middle age women.

Unfortunately, in order to pull off this "badass" move, the car was going way too fast, and the cocky teenager rammed into the car in front of them, smashing it up pretty good. Of course, this paragon of human virtue tried to flee the scene, but the middle age women followed him. As he drove out of the lot, I heard them scream, "You tried to steal our spot, you dumb motherfucker, but we have your license number!!"

We went in to do our shopping, and when we came out, the two ladies were standing by the smashed car with it's owner and a police car, happily giving all the info necessary to find the punk ass kid.

He really shouldn't have stolen their spot.

[TriPolar]

I fucking love this post. It should be printed up and given to middle schoolers. Sage advice.

Yeah, I can't see how giving a story about cross dressing prostitutes to middle schoolers could go wrong.

[miss elizabeth]

Yeah, I can't see how giving a story about cross dressing prostitutes to middle schoolers could go wrong.

Hey, they need to know who not to fuck with.

Also, :rolleyes: to you!

[Cheesesteak]

Yeah, I can't see how giving a story about cross dressing prostitutes to middle schoolers could go wrong.It's a good time for kids to think about what kind of career they'd like to pursue, so they should be aware of their options.

[SnakesCatLady]

Years ago I had gone into a bar with a friend to throw some darts. We were minding our own business when a woman we knew approaches us at started yelling at me.

A little backstory; this woman had a feud going with two of my friends. I really wasn't in on it and didn't much care. I was known as being easy to get along with; not the kickass type.

So this drunk woman is in my face and I'm pretty much ignoring her as best I can when she spits in my face.

I honestly don't remember throwing the first punch, when the dancing was over I'd blacked both of her eyes. Other than the hair she'd pulled out, I didn't have a mark on me.

I am not a badass; that was the only fight I've been in since I was in middle school. But don't spit in my face.

[billfish678]

I've got one. I was actually being a bit on the petty side but I think there is a lesson here. I was taking a graduate level course. The prof had been in this field for 50 to 60 years. There were no course handouts (or at the least very few, I forget). There were not text books. There were no specific reference books. It was an overview of a large field of information. You got almost all of your info from madly taking notes while you saw slide after slide in quick sucession. And it was often info dense material. An hour and half of that and you were wore out. Don't get me wrong I enjoyed the course.

Well, us handfull of students have gathered a few hours before the test and are going over our homework problems and notes. I say something like "remember X has properties A and Y has properties B". Well, another student gets all pissy and says "MY NOTES say X has B and Y has A". I politely note that she could be wrong or I could be wrong. Hell, I don't know whose right or wrong. Shit, I certainly could be wrong. She gets even more buttheaded (which is funny because she wasn't no straight A genius (and neither was I). And given how hurriedly you had to take notes who knows? Hell, the other students didn't even HAVE notes on that particular point (and ironically they didnt seem to care either way).

Well, this is bothering me and I WANT to know one way or the other. So, I walk my ass over the profs office and ask him. Turns out my notes are right (not that I cared about that, I just wanted the RIGHT answer). Then he implies that its a very good thing I asked.

I come back to the group and very strongly suggest that my notes were the correct ones and noted thats how I was going to answer any question regarding that.

Well, Little Miss Couldn't Be Wrong came up about 5 to 10 points shorter than she could have on that particular test. I think everybody else got the hint. And thats how I roll in the academic hood beyotch.

[cochrane]

I was driving home with a friend late one night when a car, presumably full of teenagers, passed us illegally and at great speed. I guess they didn't notice that the car right behind them was a cop car. Busted!

The same thing happened to me one night. There was a sheriff's deputy who witnessed it. The deputy pulled next to me and addressed me over his P.A.: "Sir, please follow me and pull in behind me when I stop this guy." When I pulled behind the deputy, he came to my window and asked me if I was willing to be a witness if the guy contested his ticket in court. I said of course, and gave him my name, address, and phone number. I never got called, so I guess the guy paid his ticket. But it was a sweet feeling watching the guy get his comeuppance.

[Soylent Juicy]

BG: I was 17 years old, very meek and mousy, and weighed about 98 lbs. Never been in an altercation in my life. /BG

You know when teenage boys get drunk and fight? Yeah. My first boyfriend and I were at someone's house when I heard a strange noise outside. I looked over the balcony to see our friend (much bigger than my then-BF) with my then-BF against the wall, pounding the shit out of him. I saw red - I ran down the stairs in my sock feet, jumped on my friend's back and started punching him as hard as I could in the head (you know how girls jump on a guy's back when fighting them? I HAD to jump on his back to reach his head - he was a BIG GUY!!) My friend turned, looked at me and said "Back off, Juicy." then punched me square in the face. I staggered back and the only reason I fell was because I slipped on some ice, but that made it look worse. Long story short: my friend ended up on his knees apologizing to me. The next day he showed up with a big black eye and said to my then-BF: "I think your ol' lady did this!!"

To this day (21 years later) he and I are still friends.

[Baffle]

The short version:

1. Drunk driver hits the "pullin family truckster".

2. I make him my hobby for the next few years (legal stuff ensues; people in suits using fun words like "garnishment").

3. Drunk driver's financial house of cards collapses (unexpected bonus).

4. Drunk driver loses wife (had enough of his shit).

5. Drunk driver loses home (is evicted by deputies).

6. Suits inform me drunk driver last seen living under downtown bridge. :D


Liquor bottles should come with a picture of my truck on the label; And a warning that says, "Don't hit him."

So you ended up taking a guy who was probably otherwise a functioning member of society and completely destroyed his life? Yeah, that seems like a fair trade for the ding in your truck. And you're even proud of it.

Your actions helped take an educated, employable man and made him into a homeless drunk. You go ahead and gloat all you want, but realize your actions cost society a lot more than his ever did.

[Absolute]

So you ended up taking a guy who was probably otherwise a functioning member of society and completely destroyed his life? Yeah, that seems like a fair trade for the ding in your truck. And you're even proud of it.

Your actions helped take an educated, employable man and made him into a homeless drunk. You go ahead and gloat all you want, but realize your actions cost society a lot more than his ever did.
Drunk drivers kill people. Fuck 'em.

It sounds like this guy was hardly an upstanding member of society in the first place.

[tr0psn4j]

So you ended up taking a guy who was probably otherwise a functioning member of society and completely destroyed his life? Yeah, that seems like a fair trade for the ding in your truck. And you're even proud of it.

Your actions helped take an educated, employable man and made him into a homeless drunk. You go ahead and gloat all you want, but realize your actions cost society a lot more than his ever did.

I think your definition of "functioning member of society" is a little different from most other people's definition.

[Cryptic C62]

Drunk drivers kill people. Fuck 'em.

This.

It's the eleventh commandment: Thou shalt not drive drunk, else thou shalt be fucked.

[TreacherousCretin]

Drunk drivers kill people. Fuck 'em.


Amen.


.

[Scubaqueen]

Years ago one Halloween evening as I was driving home, I saw something that still makes my blood curdle with rage every time I think about it even today.

A couple of neighborhood boys had gotten hold of a black cat, which they were tossing repeatedly into the air and sometimes catching it and sometimes not. By the time I did an unscheduled and unrehearsed vehicular slide into the culdesac where the little bastards were, their eyes had gone three times their normal size.

I got out of the car, all majorly pissed-off, 5’10” of me and snarled, “give me that cat. NOW!" I was in radio then, so I had far better voice control than I do now, and I seriously suspect that what came out of me would probably have made Tony the Tiger proud (I’m a woman, BTW :D).

Then - dead lying through my teeth - I told them I knew exactly where they lived and if they ever, EVER mistreated another animal on my watch I would make very sure the local constabulary would be paying their parents a visit AND I would personally be filing animal cruelty charges against their nasty little asses, parents be damned.

I laid it on thick and heavy and probably sounded like the end of the world on two legs. I sincerely, deeply, truly, hope that I did and that I scarred the little shits for life. Hopefully neither of them ever did something so irresponsibly cruel again. Exactly that kind of behavior is why shelters and other animal rescue outfits don’t let black cats out of their protection during October.

To their credit, they instantly handed me the cat, not much past kitten stage, and bolted like I’d set fire to them. Wish I had… I have no idea if the animal belonged to either of them, and frankly at that point, I didn’t care. The little guy came home with me, there and then. Who knows what might have happened to that cat if I hadn’t spotted what they were doing – literally out of the corner of my eye.

Spooky, as we ended up naming him, fortunately was undamaged, if rather spazzed out by his mistreatment. He recovered without mishap and lived with us for some time, and then when my sister got married, she took him with her to her new home. He lived to a ripe old age, lucky boy.

[Machine Elf]

So you ended up taking a guy who was probably otherwise a functioning member of society and completely destroyed his life? Yeah, that seems like a fair trade for the ding in your truck. And you're even proud of it.

I'm proud of him, too.

How'd you conclude the drunk driver was "probably otherwise a functioning member of society?"

According to pullin:

-The drunk driver ended up getting his wages garnished, presumably because he was unwilling or unable to pay; productive members of society meet their financial obligations.

-the drunk driver's "financial house of cards" collapsed. IOW, he was living beyond his means, and the consequences of his own decision to drive drunk put him into crisis.

-the drunk driver's wife left him, having had enough of his shit. Most people wouldn't choose to leave their spouse over a single incidence of driving drunk; it seems likely he was a habitual drunk driver, a habitual drunk, or otherwise just a shitty husband.

If society is going to punish someone, it's going to cost us money to do so. Frankly, I think this case turned out pretty well. If he's living under a bridge, that's a pretty low cost to society; the alterntative is imprisonment, which is pretty darned expensive to society.

[cjepson]

This is really mild but it's so out of my comfort zone that it's the only time I ever really did anything of the sort. Last year I was working in the back yard when I heard the sound of tin cans hitting the street and laughter. I went around to the front and saw two empty Sprite cans on the sidewalk next to my daughter's boyfriend's car, and two people walking away down the street. Now, this boyfriend was a loser, but that's another story... I didn't want that sort of thing starting up. So after thinking things over for awhile, I took the cans, got in the car, and headed down the street. I soon overtook the two young leaders of tomorrow, who were on the opposite side of the street walking away from me. I kind of swooped up next to them, screeched to a halt and said, "Hey guys, what's the deal with the Sprite cans?" They were taken aback... they insisted the cans were already there and they just kicked them, but they also offered to dispose of them for me, obviously wanting to avoid trouble. So that one turned out OK.

[Sailboat]

I wrote up an elaborate defense proving that drunk drivers contribute more to society than any other class of person. I was astonished! But before I could post it and clinch this argument, some lousy drunk driver ran over my USB hub, and it was lost forever.

[tdn]

So there I was, driving drunk, and some moron had his USB hub out on the sidewalk. I ran over that fucker!

No one messes with me.

[Cheesesteak]

Doing a Corporate Valuation course, one of the projects was to form teams, and, over the course of a week or two, negotiate the strike price for an IPO with another team. My team was the Bank, the other team the Corp. The goal for the bank is to get the lowest price possible, the corp, the highest price. In any case, the lowest score goes to any group who can't make a deal.

First meeting, we play a little footsie over who will give their estimate first, so our team proposes to write both numbers down and pass them across. The other team says "no, you're the bank, you work for us, you're the experts, give us a number" So we lowball them. They act all outraged and storm out. A couple of minutes later they come back, we have some fruitless discussion and one of them gives us his card to call later. My teammate tears the card up in front of him and throws it in the trash.

Fast forward to the class where we hand in our results, we have two documents in hand, one with "no deal" and one with a blank space. We place the "no deal" document on the teacher's desk before the class starts and wait. They come up to us and ask to talk in the hall, we hammer out a deal right quick, got ourselves an A.

[Bosstrain]

All these are great, I've been reading them instead of doing what I should be doing right now :smack::D.

This is an incident that didn't happen to me really so I hope it counts, either way the story will make you want to cheer, and at the same time you'll learn to never fuck with an old guy :D:

There was this very old gentlemen walking down the sidewalk, I say walking, but it was more like hobbling due to his age, this guy could've easily been 90. As he makes his way along very slowly, these two young punks stroll up and start talking to him. At first it seemed innocent enough, but then they started struggling, I think they were trying to rob him but it wasn't going smoothly, he wasn't going down without a fight. One would think someone that age would simply give in knowing it's better to lose a little cash or something than resist, either that or he figured now was a good time as any to kick the proverbial bucket. Well it was just a few quick seconds later he got some distance between himself and the assailants, and seeing this level of resistance from the guy the pair must have decided they needed to beat him into submission. So as they raised their fists to start swinging, the old goat put his up in a very classic, old school, cartoon style with his fists directly in front of his face. Anyone could see him to be outmatched, not only were there two attackers, but they were both many times younger and far stronger. However, this didn't phaze the man, I'm not even sure if the guy cared at all, anyone could look in his eyes at that moment and start hearing the "Eye of the Tiger" in their head, and I'm sure all he was thinking was 'you ain't gettin my money you fuckers'. Half a heartbeat later he starts givin' it to 'em, his fists flying out like two freakin Jack In the Box's, only these were boxing ones :D. One after the other, he starts landing blows on the next one as the other staggers back, keeping his elbows together and smackin' 'em on their kissers with his knuckles. I'm not sure how many times he hit those punks but I'm here to tell you it was a lot, and he wasn't holding back, nor did his strikes seem weak in any way. Effectively he kept them at bay until finally they decided to retreat, bloody noses and all.

Naturally I made this sound drawn out merely to describe how purely awesome it was, but actually the whole ordeal only lasted a very short amount of time. He may have caught them off-guard since they didn't expect such an onslaught, but by the time assistance showed up, the punks had had more than enough. The guy still wanted to fight even after they ran away, his deadly weapons circling in the air as he looked on with those cold, steely eyes....I can still hear that song whenever I think about it........

[Risin' up, back on the street
Did my time, took my chances
Went the distance, now I'm back on my feet
Just a man and his will to survive......]

[billfish678]

Thats damn funny Bosstrain. That old man needs to get a job at McDonalds :)

[pullin]

So you ended up taking a guy who was probably otherwise a functioning member of society and completely destroyed his life? Yeah, that seems like a fair trade for the ding in your truck. And you're even proud of it.

Your actions helped take an educated, employable man and made him into a homeless drunk. You go ahead and gloat all you want, but realize your actions cost society a lot more than his ever did.

We were his fourth victim. And I'm an ex-EMT/Ambulance driver who's pulled a few of their broken victims out of the wreckage.




Drive safe,
pullin

[Qadgop the Mercotan]

We were his fourth victim. And I'm an ex-EMT/Ambulance driver who's pulled a few of their broken victims out of the wreckage.
Good for you. Maybe there won't be a 5th victim for this guy, if he really hits bottom and decides to change.

I had a patient today who was entering prison after his 5th DUI conviction. On his 5th arrest, he not only drove drunk, but hit a teen on a bike. The kid got some bad road rash and a broken arm, and recovered fully, but still...

[MPB in Salt Lake]

I had a patient today who was entering prison after his 5th DUI conviction. On his 5th arrest, he not only drove drunk, but hit a teen on a bike. The kid got some bad road rash and a broken arm, and recovered fully, but still...

Good Dr. Qadgop, just for SaG's, how many times would you estimate that YOU personally drove a motor vehicle under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol, until you finally managed to get your head together/sober up?

[Lancia]

I was driving home with a friend late one night when a car, presumably full of teenagers, passed us illegally and at great speed. I guess they didn't notice that the car right behind them was a cop car. Busted!

Years ago my wife and I were driving her friend home after she had visited for the weekend. We were on a straight stretch of two-lane highway, only a couple of miles from her friends house. There was a line of four cars, with us third from the front. The first car wasn't being slow; the first three of us were spread out and the fourth was riding our tail. Once we were on this straight stretch, asshole behind us decides he is going to pass all of us. at the end if the straight was a gentle curve, and just as asshole is right past us -- with two more cars to pass -- a county sheriff's cruiser comes around the corner. Now, this idiot didn't pull back into our lane. If he would have he would have been fine. Nope, he floors it, apparently not realizing it was a cop coming in the other direction. Cop pulls over to the shoulder, and waits. Idiot finally passes the lead car and pulls back into the right lane. By this time all four of us are past the cop. Cop does a u turn, and goes after him.

We get to my wife's friend's house, chat for half an hour or so, say goodbye and leave. Returning home, cop still has this dude pulled over, but this time there's a state trooper there as well. Around here usually means drugs were found, and a big load at that.

I'm guessing the genius who decided to pass three cars while a cop was coming in the other direction was slapping himself silly that night. Well, only if one of his cellmates wasn't doing that for him.

[Lancia]

Oh! I have a story that only a little bit fits, but it's great so I'm posting it.

A few years ago the SO and I went to the grocery store, and were walking towards the entrance. As we walked through the parking lot, we saw a car with two middle age women waiting while a car backed out so they could pull into the spot. As soon as the car backing out got clear, a car being driven by a cocky teenager flew up and drove into the spot; stealing the spot from the middle age women.

Unfortunately, in order to pull off this "badass" move, the car was going way too fast, and the cocky teenager rammed into the car in front of them, smashing it up pretty good. Of course, this paragon of human virtue tried to flee the scene, but the middle age women followed him. As he drove out of the lot, I heard them scream, "You tried to steal our spot, you dumb motherfucker, but we have your license number!!"

We went in to do our shopping, and when we came out, the two ladies were standing by the smashed car with it's owner and a police car, happily giving all the info necessary to find the punk ass kid.

He really shouldn't have stolen their spot.

Oh, God, this reminds me of another one. I come home from work one night and there is a business card in the doorjam. :confused: The card was from a sgt. with the local city cops. On the back was a handwritten note: "Mr. [Lancia], you need to call the number on the front of this card, and speak with me immediately".

What the FUCK?! I have never had so much as a speeding ticket, ever, so I was understandably worried. So I called the number. Talked to the cop. Turns out he was looking for my brother. My brother had put down my address when he got charged with possession of pot a few years ago. I never knew this. One day my brother's girlfriend, who is driving his car, gets in a fender bender in a parking lot and hotfoots it out of there, failing to realise someone copied down the plate number. Cops run the plate, find my brother's name at my address, and pay me a visit. God, I was pissed.

[Cryptic C62]

Doing a Corporate Valuation course, one of the projects was to form teams, and, over the course of a week or two, negotiate the strike price for an IPO with another team. My team was the Bank, the other team the Corp. The goal for the bank is to get the lowest price possible, the corp, the highest price. In any case, the lowest score goes to any group who can't make a deal.

First meeting, we play a little footsie over who will give their estimate first, so our team proposes to write both numbers down and pass them across. The other team says "no, you're the bank, you work for us, you're the experts, give us a number" So we lowball them. They act all outraged and storm out. A couple of minutes later they come back, we have some fruitless discussion and one of them gives us his card to call later. My teammate tears the card up in front of him and throws it in the trash.

Fast forward to the class where we hand in our results, we have two documents in hand, one with "no deal" and one with a blank space. We place the "no deal" document on the teacher's desk before the class starts and wait. They come up to us and ask to talk in the hall, we hammer out a deal right quick, got ourselves an A.

...so where's the interesting part?

[PlainJain]

So there I was, driving drunk, and some moron had his USB hub out on the sidewalk. I ran over that fucker!

No one messes with me.
Priceless, thanks.

[Mighty_Girl]

Bravo.

One of my patients threatened one of my nurses recently.

He's in the segregation unit now. From there he may go to supermax.

You do not f**k with my nurses.And every doctor around here is going to be green with envy.

Your actions helped take an educated, employable man and made him into a homeless drunk. You go ahead and gloat all you want, but realize your actions cost society a lot more than his ever did.Best username/post ever!

[cochrane]

Good Dr. Qadgop, just for SaG's, how many times would you estimate that YOU personally drove a motor vehicle under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol, until you finally managed to get your head together/sober up?:rolleyes: After all this time, I suppose I shouldn't be surprised over posters who espouse outlandish opinions, seemingly just to be contrary.

Anybody who has been arrested for DUI five times, caused an injury to a person, and still hasn't wised up should be locked away for a long time. I've never been pulled over for DUI, or had an accident after drinking,but that didn't make it right for me or for anyone else. And if I had ever been arrested for DUI, or run into somebody, it would have been right for me to have been prosecuted. I wouldn't have expected to get a pass, whether for one DUI, or for five. And what's right for me should be right for anyone else. I was very fortunate to have never gotten into trouble after having had too much to drink, but I accept there would be consequences if I have. That was in the past, and I have not driven under the influence for decades. One is not like the other.

Speaking only for myself and not for QtheM, of course.

[Triskadecamus]

I am not a dangerous man.

Once upon a time, I was insane. This was before I got better. I was very confused, very angry, and almost unable to speak. I was homeless, and looked like it. I did not do anything to people when I was crazy; I just wandered around trying to die of exposure in out of the way places.

Late one night some punks in a fast car drove by me, and yelled something. I don’t know what they yelled. But, my reaction, or lack of it evidently was offensive to one or more of them. Their car slammed to a stop, and all four of them jumped out, and started swaggering toward me. I was paralyzed emotionally over my absolute unwillingness to express my rage, and entirely suicidal in my outlook on life. These guys wanted to pick a fight with me. I was overjoyed! I walked toward them with my fists clenched, and a big smile on my face. Someone was gonna die, and it might be me!

They all changed their minds, and got back into their car. I guess I was that guy that Clint was talking about. I was very disappointed.

Tris

[Truman Burbank]

but one Christmas season my wife and walking back to our white Volvo station wagon in the mall parking lot, and there's this guy struggling to open the driver's side door of my car. Without a moment's conscious deliberation, I channel this gruff voice, which I've never heard come out of my mouth since, and charged towards the guy demanding to know what he thinks he's doing.
His eyes got REALLY big.


Turns out he'd parked his identical model Volvo station wagon one aisle over, and was wondering why his key wasn't working...

[Zebra]

I don't mind this so much except for this part.


The short version:
2. I make him my hobby for the next few years (legal stuff ensues; people in suits using fun words like "garnishment").




Few years? A few years of somebody suing can ruin anyone's financial house and ruin a marriage. Not that I like drunk drivers and I think the courts are far too easy on them but this seems a bit extreme for a dented truck.

[SleepyDuck]

Years ago one Halloween evening as I was driving home, I saw something that still makes my blood curdle with rage every time I think about it even today.

A couple of neighborhood boys had gotten hold of a black cat, which they were tossing repeatedly into the air and sometimes catching it and sometimes not. By the time I did an unscheduled and unrehearsed vehicular slide into the culdesac where the little bastards were, their eyes had gone three times their normal size.

I got out of the car, all majorly pissed-off, 5’10” of me and snarled, “give me that cat. NOW!" I was in radio then, so I had far better voice control than I do now, and I seriously suspect that what came out of me would probably have made Tony the Tiger proud (I’m a woman, BTW :D).

Then - dead lying through my teeth - I told them I knew exactly where they lived and if they ever, EVER mistreated another animal on my watch I would make very sure the local constabulary would be paying their parents a visit AND I would personally be filing animal cruelty charges against their nasty little asses, parents be damned.

I laid it on thick and heavy and probably sounded like the end of the world on two legs. I sincerely, deeply, truly, hope that I did and that I scarred the little shits for life. Hopefully neither of them ever did something so irresponsibly cruel again. Exactly that kind of behavior is why shelters and other animal rescue outfits don’t let black cats out of their protection during October.

To their credit, they instantly handed me the cat, not much past kitten stage, and bolted like I’d set fire to them. Wish I had… I have no idea if the animal belonged to either of them, and frankly at that point, I didn’t care. The little guy came home with me, there and then. Who knows what might have happened to that cat if I hadn’t spotted what they were doing – literally out of the corner of my eye.

Spooky, as we ended up naming him, fortunately was undamaged, if rather spazzed out by his mistreatment. He recovered without mishap and lived with us for some time, and then when my sister got married, she took him with her to her new home. He lived to a ripe old age, lucky boy.

You are my new hero. :cool:

Oh, and Fuck drunk drivers. Seriously.

[jabiru]

And every doctor around here is going to be green with envy.

Not to mention the nurses.

[pullin]

I don't mind this so much except for this part.


Few years? A few years of somebody suing can ruin anyone's financial house and ruin a marriage. Not that I like drunk drivers and I think the courts are far too easy on them but this seems a bit extreme for a dented truck.

I'm a Texan. The yarn's gotta sound good, ya know? ;)

I'll add a little more detail. There was only one wage garnishment. 'Buford' decided to evade my clutches by quitting his job and taking another. Presumably he thought his new employer would not be deducting the prescribed amount for the courts from his paycheck. With a little effort and exploring on our part, he was discovered and da Judge kept the dollar amount the same. Since the new job paid less, the percentage going to me actually rose (and he had even less money to live on). This hastened his journey to "outdoor" living.

He was also sentenced to pay a certain dollar amount to us for various damages in addition to the wage garnishment. As you might expect, this didn't happen without a little pressure from us (thru the prosecutor's office).

All told, the saga lasted about two years and we did spend considerable time and effort (and phone calls and travel) to keep the pressure on him. He kept trying to evade and disappear, and we simply were not going to let the matter drop until we'd extracted every last penny he owed us. We were only a few hundred from completion when he lost his last job (and an attorney told us he'd been located hanging out under a particular bridge noted both for homeless squatters and a source of day labor for contractors). As I recall, I made a pompous speech where I declared my intention to "sue the sumbitch for his goddam grocery cart" :p, but we decided to declare victory and move on.

And Zebra, it was far more than a "dent". There was considerable damage, bruises from seat belts, and I got to try and comfort my sobbing wife while he laughed. He deserved what he got.

[t-bonham@scc.net]

One of my patients threatened one of my nurses recently.

He's in the segregation unit now. From there he may go to supermax.

You do not f**k with my nurses.I have a friend who was the nurse at the county jail, before she retired. Generally, she was treated very well by the prisoners, her patients. They knew she was one of the few people there who did good things for them, including passing out their medications.

But one time Mr. X got upset & assaulted her, managing to slap her & push her into a wall before the deputy escorting her could intervene. She wasn't seriously hurt, but the jail rules required them to call in a doctor from the nearby hospital to check her out before she could resume seeing patients & distributing medications. That took some time; meanwhile the guards told all the patients waiting in line that Mr. X had assaulted the nurse, so their visit to her would be delayed or canceled, and sent them back to their cells.

About an hour later she was able to resume her duties, and saw the rest of the patients. And about 3 hours later, she saw Mr. X again. He was on a stretcher, badly beaten, and she immediately ordered him transported to the emergency room of the hospital. Some of the other prisoners had beaten him up -- they really didn't like any delays in getting their medications from the nurse.

[Gyrate]

You go ahead and gloat all you want, but realize your actions cost society a lot more than his ever did.I have the opposite view - I'm not upset that a man who brought most of his ruin upon himself is no longer a menace to society, but gloating about it is just nasty and petty. It's a sad story all around.

[Jackmannii]

I was driving home with a friend late one night when a car, presumably full of teenagers, passed us illegally and at great speed. I guess they didn't notice that the car right behind them was a cop car. Busted!I was once stopped at a red light a couple lanes over from a car full of teens that was in the left-hand turn lane. Their green arrow came on but they just sat there oblivious, prompting the driver behind them to tap his horn. Instantly an arm shot out of the teen car's window giving the guy behind them the finger. Almost as instantly his roof flashers came on. If you're going to make obscene gestures to other drivers, it's probably best to notice if they're cops.

I didn't get to see how that episode turned out, but I bet the ensuing dialogue was interesting.

[billfish678]

Not a mess with story, but still a funny road rage one. Had a relative driving on a 4 lane road. They need to make a left somewhere (but not at light), they slowed because they though they need to turn "here" but then realized no, its down "there" just a little bit. Now keep in mind this is a small business/houses and apartments kinda area where the speed limit is 35 and the cops enforce it, not some major high speed highway. Well some road rage dude just wasn't having any of this dawdling, so he pulls up beside them on the right, screaming and yelling and giving the bird. And, not just a short burst either. He should have kept it short though because he rear ended sombody else who was stopped to make a right turn in the right lane.

[Soylent Juicy]

There was considerable damage, bruises from seat belts, and I got to try and comfort my sobbing wife while he laughed. He deserved what he got.

...while he LAUGHED?! Yep. He deserved it.

[Qadgop the Mercotan]

Good Dr. Qadgop, just for SaG's, how many times would you estimate that YOU personally drove a motor vehicle under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol, until you finally managed to get your head together/sober up?
Lotsa times. So?

Personally, I'm grateful for the people who didn't enable me, who held me accountable. Including the people whose reporting of my behavior got me to the attention of authorities. And I had a LOT of authorities paying attention to me. Some with badges. Some with judicial robes.

Those are called wake-up calls, and a wise person heeds them. It wasn't until I took personal responsibility that I got well. that included discharging my debts, making other restitution, making direct amends wherever possible, and changing my behavior.

That enough SaG for you?

[Acsenray]

I'm just amazed that there's a city where you can call the police over something like that and they actually show up.

He said he was in Ocean City, right? Dealing with drunken assholes is the raison d'etre for the Ocean City police.

[ReticulatingSplines]

Ratting out a kid to the police who yells a curse word at you is now considered badass?

[Acsenray]

Ratting out a kid to the police who yells a curse word at you is now considered badass?

Was it just yelling a curse word or was it also because of the implied threat to run over a kid with their car?

[Jenaroph]

Reading the OP over, I find no use of the word "badass" nor any suggestion that the OP considers himself "badass." In fact, the OP makes a point of saying this wasn't a Clint Eastwood moment. While some of the stories in this thread describe some pretty "badass" behavior, making someone sorry they fucked with you does not by definition entail acting in a "badass" manner.

[ReticulatingSplines]

Was it just yelling a curse word or was it also because of the implied threat to run over a kid with their car?

Oh yeah, right. Like they seriously intended to run the kid over with their car.

"Hey guys, before we unpack our beach umbrellas, let's run this guy's kid over!"

Please.

[Scylla]

Ratting out a kid to the police who yells a curse word at you is now considered badass?

The real badass thing about it was how controlled I was. Normally when somebody ticks me off it ends with bodies and explosions (my real life adventures inspired the Die Hard series of films.)

What makes it badass is that I was so restrained and appropriate.

[ReticulatingSplines]

Reading the OP over, I find no use of the word "badass" nor any suggestion that the OP considers himself "badass." In fact, the OP makes a point of saying this wasn't a Clint Eastwood moment. While some of the stories in this thread describe some pretty "badass" behavior, making someone sorry they fucked with you does not by definition entail acting in a "badass" manner.

It does when you set it up like he did. I'm sure those kids are real sorry, having to listen to a cop for 5 minutes. Set those buggers straight, I'm sure!

[Acsenray]

Oh yeah, right. Like they seriously intended to run the kid over with their car.

"Hey guys, before we unpack our beach umbrellas, let's run this guy's kid over!"

Please.

Pretending to use your vehicle as a weapon can quickly become inadvertently using your vehicle as a weapon. You don't fuck around when you're driving a car.

[kopek]

Back when I was about 15 I started working at a Harley shop. The owner told me up front that when it came to the 1%ers I was going to have to find my own way; he would NOT fight my battles for me. One dude, officer in one of the "name" clubs, tried to duck his bill and just ride off. He got to the end of the street to find his brakes were out. After basically dumping it and then walking it back to the shop he gave me this "My fucking brakes are out" I replied with "Funny - folks who pay for their work rarely have that problem". He started at me and I pulled myself up to my full height (which ain't much) - and he backed away. He later told me he saw something happen my eyes that looked a whole lot like a casket - that I was ready at that moment to kill or be killed and I didn't care which. Never had a problem with him or any of his brothers after that. Been a few times over the ages my eyes have gotten that look; not a bad little talent to have.

I think everyone has the potential. I saw the same kind of thing on a housewife once. Its interesting to see.

[Lare]

But hard to develop. At least for me, what with the eyes rolling back in the sockets and the dead faint and all.

[MPB in Salt Lake]

Lotsa times. So?

Personally, I'm grateful for the people who didn't enable me, who held me accountable. Including the people whose reporting of my behavior got me to the attention of authorities. And I had a LOT of authorities paying attention to me. Some with badges. Some with judicial robes.

Those are called wake-up calls, and a wise person heeds them. It wasn't until I took personal responsibility that I got well. that included discharging my debts, making other restitution, making direct amends wherever possible, and changing my behavior.

That enough SaG for you?

Have you ever shared your troubled past with the patients/prisoners that you too often seem to hold yourself above?

YOU could have been one of them, and I get the feeling from your many posts about the charges you have in your care that you somewhat enjoy lording your status and authority above them, instead of showing empathy or compassion. There but for the grace of God and all that, right?

[Qadgop the Mercotan]

Have you ever shared your troubled past with the patients/prisoners that you too often seem to hold yourself above?

YOU could have been one of them, and I get the feeling from your many posts about the charges you have in your care that you somewhat enjoy lording your status and authority above them, instead of showing empathy or compassion. There but for the grace of God and all that, right?
My past is no secret to my patients, though I avoid personal disclosure as a rule, as 10% of my patients are psychopaths, and I don't always know which they are. Even so, the prison grapevine keeps even the new guys well-informed about my history. As such, I've had a number of patients come to me specifically, asking for information and help with their addictions.

And I do spend a lot of time giving all appropriate patients pertinent, non-judgemental information about the medical disease of chemical dependency. It's not my mandate to treat them for that, that falls within our dept. of behavioral medicine. But they get pertinent medical facts about it from me. That includes the necessity of taking personal responsibility for their disease and their actions.

And I'm well aware that I could be a patient in my institution, not an employee. It was thanks to both 'tough love' on the part of others and my own facing up to the truth and making changes that prevented that. I see far too many people fail on both those counts, being enabled and blaming everyone but themselves.

And I reject your assertion that I enjoy "lording status and authority" over my patients. Such behavior would be pathetic, given the inherent disparity in status between any incarcerated felon and civilian employee. You got a cite for that very offensive allegation? :dubious:

But when I get a patient who threatens not only my nurse, but her kids, my empathy and compassion goes to my nurse, not my patient.

And when I get sued yet again, for "violating" a patient's "constitutional right to be free of pain" because I don't agree that he needs oxycodone for his horrible back pain (which doesn't keep him off the basketball court), I will decompress and vent by pointing out such egregious behavior either to my peers, or in an anonymous manner at places like this, or both.

[tdn]

Have you ever shared your troubled past with the patients/prisoners that you too often seem to hold yourself above?

YOU could have been one of them, and I get the feeling from your many posts about the charges you have in your care that you somewhat enjoy lording your status and authority above them, instead of showing empathy or compassion. There but for the grace of God and all that, right?

Who pissed in your cornflakes this morning?

[MPB in Salt Lake]

But when I get a patient who threatens not only my nurse, but her kids, my empathy and compassion goes to my nurse, not my patient.

As it should; I certainly wasn't faulting you for that in any possible way.

My point was you mentioned a new prisoner (5 DUI's) and it occurred to me that someone with a heavy duty drug addiction in their past had likely committed the same crime on many occasions and maybe shouldn't be casting stones.

I am not trying to denigrate the very challenging work that you doubtlessly perform day to day, in less than ideal surroundings; I have read your posts for years, and have always hoped that your personal struggles would make you an advocate for the prisoners that are in your care who are after all, in many cases, fighting against some of the same demons that you yourself once were faced with.

[MPB in Salt Lake]

Too late to edit---I can understand how you (or anyone else, myself included) would maybe naturally put themselves on a higher moral plane than a murderer or a child molester, but I have driven drunk, as have many, MANY others reading this post, and never had to face the consequences, and I guess that I figure that I am not really any better, in an ethical sense, than a guy who happens to get caught.

I did read where the specific prisoner I am referring to badly injured someone, which is a whole different story, but the point is that there are certain crimes (mostly so-called "victimless crimes" but crimes nonetheless) that I don't feel that I am in a position to judge others too harshly for....

Finally, I am sure that you are a fine Doctor and do what you think is best for your patients, and I apologize for my earlier comments that offended you.

MPB

[Qadgop the Mercotan]

My point was you mentioned a new prisoner (5 DUI's) and it occurred to me that someone with a heavy duty drug addiction in their past had likely committed the same crime on many occasions and maybe shouldn't be casting stones.
I'd hardly call that casting stones. That's pointing out the inevitable progression of the disease if remission is not achieved.

Rather than suffer an incident where I physically hurt someone (whether in an MVA due to impaired driving, or harming a patient due to impaired practice) due to my addiction, I'd want to have someone nail me to the wall before I did so, and help me hit bottom and recover (which is how it worked out.)

To do as my one patient did, to not get the message after 4 previous DUIs and jail time and mandated alcohol treatments, and to commit a 5th DUI and injure someone else would be anathema to me.

So the guy's doing hard time for that. And that is a logical consequence of his behavior. I'm okay with that. I'm grateful it wasn't me, but it could have been. And it would also have been just, had it been me. But the guy can still find recovery, and change for the better. He won't be in forever. He can choose to change. Many of us did.

[Annie-Xmas]

My point was you mentioned a new prisoner (5 DUI's) and it occurred to me that someone with a heavy duty drug addiction in their past had likely committed the same crime on many occasions and maybe shouldn't be casting stones.

That's an awfully broad brush you're painting with there.

I had a pill addiction and a serious binge drinking problem. I never drove at all during that time. I still tell people I don't care if you drink and drug yourself into the gutter, but if you get behind the wheel you might as well take out a gun and start shooting people.

[MPB in Salt Lake]

That's an awfully broad brush you're painting with there...

I don't want to continue to derail this thread, but I suspect that it's pretty accurate. With the DUI laws written the way they are, I would bet that a significant majority of social drinkers (not full blown alcoholics, just garden variety drinkers) have gotten behind the wheel at some point in their life when over the .08% limit.

[Sailboat]

Pretending to use your vehicle as a weapon can quickly become inadvertently using your vehicle as a weapon. You don't fuck around when you're driving a car.

I'll equate that to pointing a gun at someone and mouthing "bang." And I believe there's an ironclad rule about pointing guns at people?

Tr, but I have driven drunk, as have many, MANY others reading this post

Eh. I'm no saint, but one (of several) reasons I don't chemically alter my consciousness is so that I don't have to worry about putting others at risk through impaired judgment.

[Qadgop the Mercotan]

I don't want to continue to derail this thread, but I suspect that it's pretty accurate. With the DUI laws written the way they are, I would bet that a significant majority of social drinkers (not full blown alcoholics, just garden variety drinkers) have gotten behind the wheel at some point in their life when over the .08% limit.
that's true.

But non-alcoholics who get a DUI stop drinking and driving!

Get one DUI and your chance of being an alcoholic is pretty much the same as somene who's never gotten one.

But get two, and your chance of being an alcoholic is about 90%.

Get 3, and you're up over 99%.

[Rachellelogram]

I still tell people I don't care if you drink and drug yourself into the gutter, but if you get behind the wheel you might as well take out a gun and start shooting people.
There is an extraordinarily substantial difference between these activities. Picking up a gun and shooting people shows active intent to harm, and will always result in serious harm or death (unless you have the aim of a fishwife). Driving impaired is an activity that I suspect a majority of adults have done at least once in their lives (whether they'll admit it or not is a different issue). Negligence and active intent are viewed differently by our judicial system, and by the vast, vast majority of thinking adults. Your hysterical declarations to the contrary aren't going to impress anybody here, or change anybody's mind.

Yes, I have driven impaired. No, I wouldn't do it anymore. I didn't get caught, but I was very freaking lucky.

[drachillix]

You do not f**k with my nurses.

Last time I checked...nurses liked being fucked too.

[gaffa]

There was this very old gentlemen walking down the sidewalk, I say walking, but it was more like hobbling due to his age, this guy could've easily been 90. As he makes his way along very slowly, these two young punks stroll up and start talking to him. At first it seemed innocent enough, but then they started struggling, I think they were trying to rob him but it wasn't going smoothly, he wasn't going down without a fight. One would think someone that age would simply give in knowing it's better to lose a little cash or something than resist, either that or he figured now was a good time as any to kick the proverbial bucket. Well it was just a few quick seconds later he got some distance between himself and the assailants, and seeing this level of resistance from the guy the pair must have decided they needed to beat him into submission. So as they raised their fists to start swinging, the old goat put his up in a very classic, old school, cartoon style with his fists directly in front of his face. Anyone could see him to be outmatched, not only were there two attackers, but they were both many times younger and far stronger. However, this didn't phaze the man, I'm not even sure if the guy cared at all, anyone could look in his eyes at that moment and start hearing the "Eye of the Tiger" in their head, and I'm sure all he was thinking was 'you ain't gettin my money you fuckers'. Half a heartbeat later he starts givin' it to 'em, his fists flying out like two freakin Jack In the Box's, only these were boxing ones :D. One after the other, he starts landing blows on the next one as the other staggers back, keeping his elbows together and smackin' 'em on their kissers with his knuckles. I'm not sure how many times he hit those punks but I'm here to tell you it was a lot, and he wasn't holding back, nor did his strikes seem weak in any way. Effectively he kept them at bay until finally they decided to retreat, bloody noses and all.
Great story! Sounds a lot like this character (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cohen_the_Barbarian#Cohen_the_Barbarian). From the entry:

On his first appearance in the series he is already an old man, but still tough enough to handle anything the world can throw at him; his opponents often underestimate him because of his age, realizing too late that a man who does for a living what Cohen does and nevertheless survives to such an age must be very good at it indeed.

Age doesn't necessarily make one week. My wife's grandfather lived to 102, and visited our 3rd floor walk-up apartment in his 90s. The stairs routinely winded teenagers, and he just walked right up. Never underestimate the lasting effects of a hardscrabble life.

[Qadgop the Mercotan]

Last time I checked...nurses liked being fucked too.
Big difference between f**king and f**king with.

[gonzomax]

I was in a bar with a group of guys after a golf outing. Someone said my golf partner was in a fight outside. I jumped in the middle and separated them. It became apparent that they both wanted to fight. I went back in the bar and ordered a beer as they went after each other. I tried.

[Acsenray]

However, this didn't phaze the man

Nitpick: faze. I'm never fazed by the phases of the moon.

[gaffa]

I was in a bar with a group of guys after a golf outing. Someone said my golf partner was in a fight outside. I jumped in the middle and separated them. It became apparent that they both wanted to fight. I went back in the bar and ordered a beer as they went after each other. I tried.
Hey, you violated both Rule #1 and Rule #2! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbMa4MGFCOg)

[YogSosoth]

BG: I was 17 years old, very meek and mousy, and weighed about 98 lbs. Never been in an altercation in my life. /BG

You know when teenage boys get drunk and fight? Yeah. My first boyfriend and I were at someone's house when I heard a strange noise outside. I looked over the balcony to see our friend (much bigger than my then-BF) with my then-BF against the wall, pounding the shit out of him. I saw red - I ran down the stairs in my sock feet, jumped on my friend's back and started punching him as hard as I could in the head (you know how girls jump on a guy's back when fighting them? I HAD to jump on his back to reach his head - he was a BIG GUY!!) My friend turned, looked at me and said "Back off, Juicy." then punched me square in the face. I staggered back and the only reason I fell was because I slipped on some ice, but that made it look worse. Long story short: my friend ended up on his knees apologizing to me. The next day he showed up with a big black eye and said to my then-BF: "I think your ol' lady did this!!"

To this day (21 years later) he and I are still friends.

Hey come back! Tell us the story of why he was being your BF up!

[Acsenray]

My friend turned, looked at me and said "Back off, Juicy." then punched me square in the face. I staggered back and the only reason I fell was because I slipped on some ice, but that made it look worse. Long story short: my friend ended up on his knees apologizing to me. The next day he showed up with a big black eye and said to my then-BF: "I think your ol' lady did this!!"

How did he get a black eye from punching you in the face?

[Nzinga, Seated]

I was in a bar with a group of guys after a golf outing. Someone said my golf partner was in a fight outside. I jumped in the middle and separated them. It became apparent that they both wanted to fight. I went back in the bar and ordered a beer as they went after each other. I tried.


Terrific.

[Malthus]

Not me, but my wife - when we were still dating.

I should explain that my wife isn't a large, powerful-looking woman. She is slim and slightly built, and has a very even temper. Which makes the following all the more surprising at the time, to me.

This happened at Halloween. We were comming back from a party very late at night, in costume (I was a samurai, she a geshia). We were waiting for the night bus on a main street, which was taking an unconcionably long time to arrive. The street was dotted here and there with late-night revelers.

A group of my friends and I had wandered over to puzzle over the schedule, leaving my wife standing maybe ten feet away, when all of a sudden I heard and outraged "huh!" from her and a smack. I turned around to see her with her arm outstretched and a big ugly guy staggering backwards away from her, clutching his bleeding, mashed nose and mouthing obsenities; he was one of a group of three. Naturally I ran towards this nasty scene, and so did my friends, when the other two of *his* friends grabbed him - one by each arm - and dragged him off backwards, literally dragging him off struggling and cursing.

The whole thing was over in an instant. We didn't bother to follow, since it was already dealt with. My wife told us that this guy had made an obscene remark to her and put his hand on her tit; her instinctive reaction, done instantly and without thought really, was to punch him square in the face as hard as she could. She made a right mess of his nose from what I could see. The other two, no doubt not wanting any part of a general brawl in which they were far outnumbered, and perhaps not wanting to see their buddy further damaged, dragged him off.

In short, that guy should not have fucked with the slightly built, good looking lady in the gesha outfit.

[Bam Boo Gut]

We're poddling along in the Suzuki Samurai with some rage dude on our tail, he's revving and grinding gears behind us. We slow down for a pothole and wooop ... the idiot rear ends us, we shoot forward a few feet. Everyone gets out and looks at the damage. The dude's car is all crumpled at the front where he hit the spare tire stored on the back of the jeep. The Samurai is undamaged! Rage Dude is effing and blinding and calls the cops. We hop back in the jeep and leave the scene, Rage Dude actually runs after us for a while.

Meantime here come the police - it's a straight road to the station. We flag them down and let them know we were part of the accident they're on their way to, but have decided not to press charges. The police take our info and carry on to the scene.

Thanks for reminding me of this - we laughed until it hurt.

[Gary "Wombat" Robson]

I am not much of a physical confrontation kinda guy. This story happened back when I was in college. Some friends and I were walking through a parking lot after a movie, and some twit threw a lit cigarette butt out of his car window, right by my feet. That bugs me, so I picked it up, tossed it in his lap, and said, "you dropped this."

This surprised him, but he scrambled around, grabbed the cig, swore mightily at me, and threw it at me. He realized traffic was so slow that he couldn't drive away, so he rolled up his window and locked the car doors. I crushed the cigarette out on his hood and walked away.

[t-bonham@scc.net]

I crushed the cigarette out on his hood and walked away.Better to have put it (uncrushed) on his wiper, where it would melt thru the rubber of the blade.

[curlcoat]

A bunch of friends and I were in a bar in upstate New York, having imbibed many adult beverages (one guy got lost on the way back from the potty and ended up passed out in the coat closet). I had gone up to the bar to get something new to imbibe and as I passed a table, some random guy grabbed my butt. I whipped around, grabbed him by the hair and picked him up to my eye level - as an aside, I was about 120 lbs back then and this guy was a big bear of a biker dude. But I was pissed.

Then I looked into his eyes and saw that no one was home; this guy was so drunk I'm surprised he was able to direct his hands at all. So I just dropped him back into his chair and went on my way, much to the merriment of his friends. When I got back to our table, my husband asked me what the heck I thought I was doing and I told him the guy had grabbed my butt! Oh, OK, makes sense.

[Ibanez]

Here's a revenge of the nerds story from my high school.

Dan was a nerd . Average weight nerdy looking glasses that his parents made him wear. Chess club, D&D group. Typically non confrontational but Dan had a breaking point as I saw that day.

Our cafeteria during lunch had cliques. There was a strange and unspoken hierarchy as to where people sat depending on your social status in our high school. Jocks sat at one table easily identifiable because these nimrods usually wore their football jerseys every fucking day. Nerds at the other table. James Dean table, Cool chicks table, hen table, Metal head table and the rest.

One day a food fight broke out. Common enough occurance at our high school. Food flying to and fro, these food fights typically only lasted a couple of minutes if that. Dan however was caught in the middle when it started walking with his tray of food when an apple soared accrossed the room and brained him that exploded on impact. Knocking his glasses off his head that also caused him to drop his tray off food.

Most of the people in cafeteria saw that blow. Dan started breathing heavily at first, clenching his fists while picking up what appeared to be his damaged nerdy glasses. He stood up straight and looked around the cafeteria the look on his face told us everything. Dan was gone. What laid in his place was someone who had taken on the rage of no one less than the Incredible fucking Hulk.

It was pure rage in its most primal form.

He breathed heavily while shouting "WHO FUCKING THREW THAT ??'" he shouted this repeatedly while scanning around the cafeteria looking at every table and waiting for someone to claim responsibility. No one did, the cafeteria was now completely silent.

Like a prison inmate where the desire not to be fucked with anymore he confroted the most dangerous opponent in the cafeteria as he zeroed in on the full jock table and walked over with clenched fists, broken glasses and bits of macintosh still in his hair.

Hovering over the jock table like as if he was their new overlord. He said loudly "WHO THREW THE APPLE ?"

Absoloute silence. Some of the jocks just looked at him with no emotion what so ever, others couldn't even look at him. He then raised his fists and slammed them down on their table with all of his strength. While shouting again this time as loud as he could "I SAID, WHO FUCKING THREW THAT ?

Some of them actually jumped in their seats out of fear when he did this. A few moments of silence went by with no one claiming responsibility. Dan's breathing calmed down a little he collected himself with his broken glasses and walked away slowly. No one in the cafeteria had broken their gaze off him as he saundered out of the cafeteria.

As far as I know Dan was never fucked with again the rest of his time in High School.

I saw where the apple was thrown from and it was from the jock table.

[DragonAsh]

There is a special level of hell reserved for idiots that have seats at the back of the plane, that put their luggage in the overhead bins at the -front- of the plane as they board. Since planes board back-to-front, the people sitting in the first rows of economy may find they have no place for their luggage. Usually this means your luggage gets gate-checked (this is actually my preference when I fly; pick the luggage right outside the airplane door when you get off) but it can mean delays, and it's added uncertaintly and hassle. Two things nobody wants when you travel. Especially if you have kids etc.

All because some douch didn't want to carry his briefcase to the back of the plane.

It's a shitty thing to do, and theoretically, you did not want to do this if I was working your flight.

Because, you see, there are security regulations that say we need to remove any item of luggage if it isn't clear who the owner is.

Theoretically, a flight attendent could wait until everyone was on board, theoretically take the offending piece of luggage down from the overhead bin, then theoretically whisper quietly to the people in the 2 or 3 rows nearby, 'is this your luggage? No? Hmmm, that's a security risk - better take it off the plane'.

Now just imagine the expression on the face of Mr. Big Shot when he gets to New York with his briefcase and suit carrier still in London.

[Steophan]

I am not much of a physical confrontation kinda guy. This story happened back when I was in college. Some friends and I were walking through a parking lot after a movie, and some twit threw a lit cigarette butt out of his car window, right by my feet. That bugs me, so I picked it up, tossed it in his lap, and said, "you dropped this."

This surprised him, but he scrambled around, grabbed the cig, swore mightily at me, and threw it at me. He realized traffic was so slow that he couldn't drive away, so he rolled up his window and locked the car doors. I crushed the cigarette out on his hood and walked away.

He should have had you charged with assault, and possibly with damaging his property if you damaged his car. You, on the other hand, could have complained about him littering.

I'm amazed, and slightly disgusted, by the amount of "two wrongs make a right" thinking in this thread. Breaking up a fight is good. Forcing someone into poverty and homelessness because they drove into your car is very, very bad.

The quoted example here is not quite at that level, but still pretty unpleasant.

[Ferret Herder]

I'm amazed, and slightly disgusted, by the amount of "two wrongs make a right" thinking in this thread. Breaking up a fight is good. Forcing someone into poverty and homelessness because they drove into your car is very, very bad.
Did you miss the part about that drunk driver having multiple previous DUIs, the poster being an EMT who'd been at his accident scenes where people were injured, and the drunk driver trying to change jobs to avoid wage garnishment? Or do multiple-time offenders get a pass on offenses and attempts to avoid payment if it wasn't all that bad this time and it'd just be mean?

Here's how my fender-bender went - I wasn't drunk driving, I had insurance, I paid my ticket for failure to heed a traffic signal (couldn't get stopped at a fast-changing red in time, had a ~5 mph crunch that didn't set off airbags), got sued by other driver for pain and suffering and bent fender, my insurance company provided a lawyer, and she dragged it out on her end for a few years before actually trying to take it to court, and my lawyer successfully argued failure to exercise due diligence. Dismissed. If it hadn't been, my insurance company would have covered it (it was only $10k, and my policy has very generous coverage limits), and either dropped me or raised my rates.

This is how normal accidents work, versus alcoholics with multiple DUIs who seek to avoid paying restitution.

[Machine Elf]

I am not much of a physical confrontation kinda guy. This story happened back when I was in college. Some friends and I were walking through a parking lot after a movie, and some twit threw a lit cigarette butt out of his car window, right by my feet. That bugs me, so I picked it up, tossed it in his lap, and said, "you dropped this."

This surprised him, but he scrambled around, grabbed the cig, swore mightily at me, and threw it at me. He realized traffic was so slow that he couldn't drive away, so he rolled up his window and locked the car doors. I crushed the cigarette out on his hood and walked away.

A motorcyclist friend told a similar story. In California, it's permissible for motorcycles to filter forward between cars in two adjacent lanes. This lets motorcycles move to the front at stoplights, and also lets them make progress through otherwise-stagnant traffic jams. However, it annoys car drivers from time to time, and occasionally those drivers will express their frustration/envy.

So picture a traffic jam, with my buddy on his bike slowly dog-paddling forward between cars. As he comes abreast of one fellow in a gleaming high-end BMW with a white interior, the driver jerks his car left, partially blocking my friend's progress. My friend comes to a stop, and the guy starts yelling - and then he throws a can of soda at my friend.

Three important details:
1. the can was unopened.
2. the can struck him and then tumbled only as far as his lap.
3. the irate driver had not completely blocked my friend's escape path.

My friend reached down, picked up the can of soda, opened it, threw it back in the asshole's car, and then continued dog-paddling forward through traffic.

[ugly ripe tomato]

Mine happened late 90s at the local roller rink. At the time I was 5'4" and 110 lbs tops, no figure to speak of, and had short hair. I also lived in sweatshirts and jeans so I tended to look very boyish, although the presence of purse, big dangly earrings, and white skates with purple laces might have provided a clue.

I was with my friend Amanda, a definite mother hen type.

As I was skating along minding my own business, an assortment of morons kept crowding me demanding to know if I was a boy or girl because someone, I don't remember the name so I'll call him Shitstain, wanted to know. My response was to coast serenely past them because when they're screaming "Shitstain wants to know if you're a boy or girl!!!!" and you're just skating along, you're not the one who looks like a fucking moron.

Of course one can't keep skating forever, so I met up with Amanda and her boyfriend in the seating area and we were debating whether to call it a night or skate a little longer yet.

Shitstain, his posse unable to obtain for him the answer to the burning question that would prevent the catastrophic death of the Universe itself, swaggered over to demand of me in person, "You boy or a girl?"

Me: (to Amanda and BF) I'm kinda tired and have to work tomorrow so...

Shitstain: YOU A BOY OR A GIRL? (as posse clusters around him, trying to look badass)

Me: ...I'm ready to go.

Shitstain: Well? Aren't you going to answer me? (getting up in my face, which wasn't entirely successful since in my skates I was taller than he was)

Me: (to Shitstain) Nope.

Amanda: I don't see why she should have to answer you! That's not a very nice thing to say! I think you owe her an apology!

Shitstain: I just wanna know if that's a boy or a girl.

Amanda: That's none of your business! I suggest you leave us alone right now!

At that point one of the employees started over, and Shits & the gang melted back into the shadows where I sincerely hope the next morning's dawn burned them into dust.

Inside I was scared shitless, and as much as I wish I had just kicked him in the package hard enough to shoot his nards out his nostrils, I'll always treasure the memory of Amanda scolding that wannabe for his lack of manners :D

[Acsenray]

I really don't feel good about taking pleasure in the fact that someone has lost eveything and is living under a bridge. I'd rather he be punished with prison.

[Gyrate]

Shitstain: I just wanna know if that's a boy or a girl.Sounds like Shitstain was a little confused about the conflicting emotions watching you skate was creating. "I'm strangely aroused by that person but don't know whether to hit on them in case it's a girl or beat them up to cover my emerging homoerotic tendencies if it's a boy! What to do, what to do..."

[Gary "Wombat" Robson]

He should have had you charged with assault, and possibly with damaging his property if you damaged his car. You, on the other hand, could have complained about him littering.

I'm amazed, and slightly disgusted, by the amount of "two wrongs make a right" thinking in this thread. Breaking up a fight is good. Forcing someone into poverty and homelessness because they drove into your car is very, very bad.

The quoted example here is not quite at that level, but still pretty unpleasant.

Assault? Are you for real? He threw trash out of his car. I threw it back in. He could have dropped it in his ashtray and all would have been well. When he threw it at my face, I think putting it out on his hood was rather restrained.

[Machine Elf]

Forcing someone into poverty and homelessness because they drove into your car is very, very bad.

Pullin didn't force the guy into poverty and homelessness; he obtained a legal judgment against him for damages caused by his negligent behavior, and then took steps to enforce the terms of that judgment. Those terms did not include homelessness as a final outcome: a drunk driver who had his finances in order and had a sense of integrity/responsibility/remorse would have been capable of paying, and would have accepted his moral and legal responsibility to do so.

Pullin forced the drunkard to pay (financially) for the damage he did; the drunkard ended up homeless because of a series of dumb decisions on his own part.

[Soylent Juicy]

Originally Posted by Soylent Juicy
My friend turned, looked at me and said "Back off, Juicy." then punched me square in the face. I staggered back and the only reason I fell was because I slipped on some ice, but that made it look worse. Long story short: my friend ended up on his knees apologizing to me. The next day he showed up with a big black eye and said to my then-BF: "I think your ol' lady did this!!"

How did he get a black eye from punching you in the face?
Sorry, should have been more detailed. I gave him the black eye while punching him. I had a bruise above my eye, his fist landed above my eyebrow.

Hey come back! Tell us the story of why he was being your BF up!
No clue whatsoever. Never bothered to find out. I just assumed it was drunk guys being idiots.

[loshan]

Back in college I was working as a cocktail waitress in a large bar on 6th Street in Austin, TX. Uniform was short black shorts, tuxedo shirt, bow tie and at least 3" black heels.

One very busy and crowded Friday night I had an overbearing customer who looked like he walked out of Bonfire of the Vanities. He kept grabbing my ass every time I walked by. I asked him nicely to keep his hands to himself...three times.

The fourth time, he didn't grab. He stuck his hand under the hem of my shorts. Not cool. I told him "one more time and I'm getting security."

The fifth time I was going by his table with a full tray over my head. As I recall, there were two frozen margaritas, a long island tea, a couple glasses of beer and a glass of red wine on that tray. When I got in front him, he grabbed my ass again.

This time, I yelped like I hadn't expected it and "accidentally" tilted my tray backwards. He was doused, and when I turned around, he had a lime wedge perched perfectly on the top of his head.:D

Then I did the "I am soooo sorry!, let me help you clean up" thing while his friends laughed their asses off.

Management paid for the asshole's dry cleaning and took it out of my check, but it was worth it.

[Annie-Xmas]

Big difference between f**king and f**king with.

QtM that is absolutely brillant! I'm gonna use that one.

[JSexton]

At a mini-golf course with my family a few years back, and there's a couple of teenagers be loud and obnoxious and generally teenagery. Not a big deal. Until I looked over and realized that what they were laughing about was taking turns whacking at a duck with their golf clubs.

Yeah, I saw red. I charged them, collared one, and threw them out of the place. I was apparently waving my golf club like a lunatic, but I have no recollection of that.

The duck recovered fully.

[Steophan]

Did you miss the part about that drunk driver having multiple previous DUIs, the poster being an EMT who'd been at his accident scenes where people were injured, and the drunk driver trying to change jobs to avoid wage garnishment? Or do multiple-time offenders get a pass on offenses and attempts to avoid payment if it wasn't all that bad this time and it'd just be mean?


Taking pleasure in someone falling that low is, well, low. He probably did bring it on himself, and one could certainly argue he deserved it. That doesn't mean that glee at his fate is appropriate.

Assault? Are you for real? He threw trash out of his car. I threw it back in. He could have dropped it in his ashtray and all would have been well. When he threw it at my face, I think putting it out on his hood was rather restrained.

Yes. If he had deliberately, rather than accidentally, throw the cigarette at you, he would be guilty of it. Just the same when you throw it back. As I said, two wrongs don't make a right, and your action was significantly more wrong than his.

That's not to say he shouldn't have dropped it in his ashtray - of course he should.

[beowulff]

I was taking some friends to the top of South Mountain for a view of the city, driving my convertible Mustang with the top down. For those who aren’t familiar with the area, South Mountain park is the largest city park in the country (possibly the world), and is considered one of the “jewels” of Phoenix. Anyway, we are winding our way to the top, when I notice a car in my rear-view mirror. The car is filled with teenagers, and as I watch, the driver reaches out the window and drops an entire bag of fast food trash onto the road. I slam on the brakes (freaking out my passengers, and raising a cloud of smoke), turn around and yell “Pick it up!” The driver looks a little stunned, but doesn’t do anything. I take off my seatbelt, turn around and stand up a little and while pointing at the bag, yell “PICK. IT. UP!” The driver gets out of the car and picks the bag up. I put my belt back on and continue to the top.
I freakin’ hate litterbugs. Especially in parks.

[Push You Down]

I was in a bar with a group of guys after a golf outing. Someone said my golf partner was in a fight outside. I jumped in the middle and separated them. It became apparent that they both wanted to fight. I went back in the bar and ordered a beer as they went after each other. I tried.

Similarly in high school I used to promote (illegal) all-ages concerts. We did one in a sketchier part of town and it was a far rougher crowd that we expected. Of course the moment I let our security guy take a smoke break a fight breaks out in front of the stage. I jump over the ticket table and run over and pull the guys apart. ...turns out they were brothers... who liked to fight. I told them they needed to take it outside NOW. But they'd be welcomed back in when they were done.

[curlcoat]

TYes. If he had deliberately, rather than accidentally, throw the cigarette at you, he would be guilty of it. Just the same when you throw it back. As I said, two wrongs don't make a right, and your action was significantly more wrong than his.

People who throw cigarettes out of cars, whether they hit someone or not, deserve to have them tossed back in their laps. How else will they learn to not do that?

[SleepyDuck]

At a mini-golf course with my family a few years back, and there's a couple of teenagers be loud and obnoxious and generally teenagery. Not a big deal. Until I looked over and realized that what they were laughing about was taking turns whacking at a duck with their golf clubs.

Yeah, I saw red. I charged them, collared one, and threw them out of the place. I was apparently waving my golf club like a lunatic, but I have no recollection of that.

The duck recovered fully.

OK, you can be my hero too :)

[Steophan]

People who throw cigarettes out of cars, whether they hit someone or not, deserve to have them tossed back in their laps. How else will they learn to not do that?

Ah, vigilantism. Hurrah :rolleyes: Or they could, you know, be fined for littering by the people who actually have the right to impose a punishment. That is, not you.

[2gigch1]

My little drunk driver story and what I did about it. (http://youtu.be/hRSCStseNfI)

[Muffin]

On a Friday night, I was woken by a loud (as in refrigerator being tipped over) fight in the apartment below me, and I was aware of the fellow there being a drunken lout, so I called the police, who arrested him after the lady of the apartment stabbed him in self-defence.

On Monday morning, I was in the holding cells (as duty counsel) below the courthouse and came upon the lout, who was ever so glad to see me, until I explained why I could not be his lawyer. Just for shits and giggles, I then popped into bail court to advise the judge as to why this fellow would not be having a lawyer that day. Things went quite nicely.

[Muffin]

pullin, the guilt will be on your shoulders when some poor bastard dents his truck's bumper when a drunk suddenly staggers out from under a bridge. ;)

[Troppus]

Ah, vigilantism. Hurrah :rolleyes: Or they could, you know, be fined for littering by the people who actually have the right to impose a punishment. That is, not you.

I always wonder the though process behind throwing out this word willy-nilly. Does the author assume that

a) Public service officers and our court system have the time and funds to try and prosecute every single crime, including those which do not directly harm or maim? (Or does the fact that with the exception of the occasional forest fire, smoking litter rarely causes physical harm mean that it should be legal?)

b) Public service officers are entirely above corruption, and can be counted on to enact fair and just charges on every single broken law? (Some cops smoke, ya know, and may or may not use an ashtray)

or c) Is the person crying vigilantism guilty of a comparable crime, and therefore minimizes the crime because of its relative convenience and ease of commission?

In other words, Steophan, do you toss butts or something? Because Gary "Wombat" Robson witnessed the tossed butt, and returned it to the owner. Maybe the smoker accidently lost control of the cigarette, and GWR retrieved it so that he could finish the cigarette and properly dispose of it. Benefit of the doubt goes both ways, ya know.


(I should add that some states post a hotline number to report littering by vehicle description and tag number. Is that vigilantism by your definition?)

[tdn]

People who throw cigarettes out of cars, whether they hit someone or not, deserve to have them tossed back in their laps. How else will they learn to not do that?

You realize that not all cars have ashtrays, right? Otherwise people wouldn't toss butts out of windows.

But tossing one back in is a seriously dangerous and assholish move.

[SmellMyWort]

Maybe being drunk and littering isn't such a huge deal when your mode of transportation is a high horse.

[Troppus]

You realize that not all cars have ashtrays, right? Otherwise people wouldn't toss butts out of windows.

But tossing one back in is a seriously dangerous and assholish move.

Problem. (http://www.google.com/search?source=ig&hl=en&rlz=&q=datray&oq=datray&aq=f&aqi=&aql=&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=0l0l0l79l0l0l0l0l0l0l0l0ll0l0#sclient=psy-ab&hl=en&safe=off&tbm=shop&source=hp&q=automobile+ashtray+cup&pbx=1&oq=automobile+ashtray+cup&aq=f&aqi=&aql=1&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=15625l27782l8l28766l18l7l3l0l0l2l297l938l0.1.3l9l0&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_cp.,cf.osb&fp=cf8d5e62edefb10&biw=1024&bih=491) Solved. (http://www.google.com/search?source=ig&hl=en&rlz=&q=auto+ashtray+window+mount&oq=auto+ashtray+window+mount&aq=f&aqi=&aql=&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=672l6328l0l6391l33l25l2l12l13l1l391l2328l0.6.4.1l11l0#sclient=psy-ab&hl=en&safe=off&tbm=shop&source=hp&q=car+ashtray+window&pbx=1&oq=car+ashtray+window&aq=f&aqi=&aql=1&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=27938l32813l1l33282l13l7l0l0l0l2l281l1375l0.4.3l7l0&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_cp.,cf.osb&fp=cf8d5e62edefb10&biw=1024&bih=491)

[twickster]

If people want to debate the correct way to deal with someone throwing a cigarette butt out the window, please start a new thread.

Thanks,

twickster, MPSIMS moderator

[Troppus]

Oooh, and if you are penniless after purchasing your smokes, lighters, and paying littering fines, here is a cheap and easy solution (http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&safe=off&q=aluminum+soda+can&gs_sm=s&gs_upl=2968l7281l0l9093l7l5l0l0l0l2l375l1406l0.1.2.2l5l0&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.,cf.osb&biw=1024&bih=491&wrapid=tlif131920645948410&um=1&ie=UTF-8&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=fi#um=1&hl=en&safe=off&tbm=isch&sa=1&q=aluminum+soft+drink+can&oq=aluminum+soft+drink+can&aq=f&aqi=&aql=1&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=13016l14860l0l15110l10l8l0l0l0l0l250l454l1.1.1l3l0&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.,cf.osb&fp=e9a968e22142249a&biw=1024&bih=491) to the <*wah!*> No ashtray! </*wah!*> problem.

[Cheesesteak]

NM, just saw the mod note

[tdn]

Problem. (http://www.google.com/search?source=ig&hl=en&rlz=&q=datray&oq=datray&aq=f&aqi=&aql=&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=0l0l0l79l0l0l0l0l0l0l0l0ll0l0#sclient=psy-ab&hl=en&safe=off&tbm=shop&source=hp&q=automobile+ashtray+cup&pbx=1&oq=automobile+ashtray+cup&aq=f&aqi=&aql=1&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=15625l27782l8l28766l18l7l3l0l0l2l297l938l0.1.3l9l0&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_cp.,cf.osb&fp=cf8d5e62edefb10&biw=1024&bih=491) Solved. (http://www.google.com/search?source=ig&hl=en&rlz=&q=auto+ashtray+window+mount&oq=auto+ashtray+window+mount&aq=f&aqi=&aql=&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=672l6328l0l6391l33l25l2l12l13l1l391l2328l0.6.4.1l11l0#sclient=psy-ab&hl=en&safe=off&tbm=shop&source=hp&q=car+ashtray+window&pbx=1&oq=car+ashtray+window&aq=f&aqi=&aql=1&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=27938l32813l1l33282l13l7l0l0l0l2l281l1375l0.4.3l7l0&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_cp.,cf.osb&fp=cf8d5e62edefb10&biw=1024&bih=491)

Cool stuff, thanks!

Half of my Christmas shopping is now done.

[Eyebrows 0f Doom]

You realize that not all cars have ashtrays, right? Otherwise people wouldn't toss butts out of windows.


So what? Is that supposed to be a defense?

[Hampshire]

So what? Is that supposed to be a defense?

Yes! It's the same reason I throw all of my garbage directly out the car window onto the roadways. It's not MY fault Toyota didn't put garbage containers in my car.

[Jackmannii]

The other night, me and my girl went ballin'
When we walked in, she turned every face in the place
A cool number jumped up and made a play for my girl
So I said, so long boy!

I said, don't mess with me, 'cause I got a cast iron arm
I said, don't mess with me, 'cause I got a cast iron arm
Oh, when you mess with me, that only ring my alarm
...Well, the same cool number made the same wrong move
I hit him in the head!

I said, don't mess with me, 'cause I got a cast iron arm

- Peanuts Wilson

[Moonlitherial]

My little drunk driver story and what I did about it. (http://youtu.be/hRSCStseNfI)

Video evidence, nearly causing a head on collision and it cost him $300, 5 days in jail and he can keep driving as long as it's for work???

God we really don't take this seriously do we.

[Troppus]

My little drunk driver story and what I did about it. (http://youtu.be/hRSCStseNfI)

Good on you, 2gigch1 ! I hope your quick thinking and clear documentation encouraged Mr. Lee to straighten up, or at least stay home when drinking. You may have saved lives with this footage.

[Loopus]

My college newspaper regularly ran "police blotter" type stories about crimes that occurred on campus. It was an urban school, and while crime wasn't rampant, it did occur on a regular basis. One particular story started out as a fairly ordinary account of a robbery at knifepoint, until it got to the part where the victim punched the knife-wielding robber in the face. The robber dropped the knife in surprise. At that point, his accomplice picked up the knife and ran away (worst accomplice ever). The former knife-wielder and victim continued to fight until the criminal finally decided to book it. The victim chased after him until finally losing him in the darkness.

The article concluded with a dry statement of "no suspects."

[Steophan]

In other words, Steophan, do you toss butts or something?

Nope, although that's mainly because I only smoke at home or in a pub beer garden. I have no problem with people dropping fag butts, though. I've been pitted for this outrageous opinion before... Feel free to find that thread if you want to criticise my views on this.

[billfish678]

. At that point, his accomplice picked up the knife and ran away (worst accomplice ever).

I don't know why but that really tickled my funny bone (well, more than it probably should anyway).

[Becky2844]

Moment? I've been fighting all my life.
When I saw Gran Torino, Clint gave me my tag line.

[curlcoat]

Ah, vigilantism.

Nope, training. If someone gets punished for doing something wrong right away, they are less likely to repeat the transgression.

Hurrah :rolleyes: Or they could, you know, be fined for littering by the people who actually have the right to impose a punishment. That is, not you.

Piffle. Cops have better things to do than chase down butt throwers.

You realize that not all cars have ashtrays, right? Otherwise people wouldn't toss butts out of windows.

My car doesn't have an ashtray - my husband uses an empty can. Lack of an ashtray is zero excuse.

[curlcoat]

If people want to debate the correct way to deal with someone throwing a cigarette butt out the window, please start a new thread.

Thanks,

twickster, MPSIMS moderator

Ooops :smack:


Sorry

Where is that groveling smilie?

[2gigch1]

Good on you, 2gigch1 ! I hope your quick thinking and clear documentation encouraged Mr. Lee to straighten up, or at least stay home when drinking. You may have saved lives with this footage.

Well the big thing, for which I have not heard an outcome for, is that the jail time may have messed up his attempt to become a citizen. Apparently any jail time, even a day, can disqualify him, and he may very well have to move back to Korea because of this.

So in this case what appears to be a light sentence actually is pretty serious.

On a lighter note I shot this nice story Thursday night. (http://youtu.be/WxN4q72L-kY)

[Soylent Juicy]

(Remember, I was the 100lb, shy, mousy, non-confrontational doormat.)

Back in my "previous life" I lived with my then-boyfriend. He preferred alcohol and his friends and didn't give two shits about me. So one night he comes home drunk and brings a bunch of people with him and they all go in the basement rec room and he cranks up the stereo. Woke me out of a sound sleep at like 3 am. I go raging downstairs, turned it down, and went back upstairs without saying a word. He turned it back up. I SNAPPED. I raged back downstairs SCREAMING "DON'T FUCK WITH ME!!" and various other obscenities while his friends looked on in terror and he just didn't give a shit. I stormed back to bed. In the morning he was passed out on the couch downstairs. So I took out the bright fuchsia pink nail polish and very carefully painted his nails. Even put on a double coat. When he woke up I said, very calmly, "I told you not to fuck with me."

[Dendarii Dame]

Several children were being mean to the younger sibling of one while they were walking to elementary school. (They were required to walk with her, as she was deemed too young to walk by herself.) They yelled at her to stay away, and other cruel things, as they were going by my house. She was sobbing so hard she almost couldn't walk.

I threw open the door and screamed at them, "You don't get to talk to her like that in front of my house! Stop it right now!" (Note that I was only a few years older than the oldest.) They stopped, and it never happened again.

[Johnny L.A.]

In California, it's permissible for motorcycles to filter forward between cars in two adjacent lanes. This lets motorcycles move to the front at stoplights, and also lets them make progress through otherwise-stagnant traffic jams. However, it annoys car drivers from time to time, and occasionally those drivers will express their frustration/envy.

I was on my way home from work one day, when this guy deliberately blocked me. He was really making a game of it. Whenever it looked like I might pass, he'd edge left so I couldn't. Eventually a person in the left lane moved over enough that Blocky McLanehog couldn't couldn't move over enough and still be in his lane. So I gunned it.

He reached out to flip me off as I passed, and got his hand smacked by my right rear-view mirror for his rudeness.

It sounded painful.

[StGermain]

About 20 years ago, I worked in an office doing credit authorization for a department store. The guy who sat next to me (these weren't cubicles, more like carrels) kept picking at me. These days it would be sexual harassment, but that wasn't a widely-considered concept back then. Constant verbal harassment. Now, I'm a small little woman, about 5'1" and lighter then. Finally I just lost it. Totally. I flew off my chair, pulled him off his and got him down on the floor and started pummeling him. When they pulled me off, he got up and left. He was out for three days, whether from pain or embarrassment I couldn't say. I didn't get written up or even talked to. My boss's desk was right behind us, and I think she felt badly for not having said or did anything to stop it.

I rarely lose my temper. Fortunately.

StG

[Isosleepy]

I posted this one in the pit a few years ago - my one moment of being an instrument of Karma.

An asshole in an Escalade is next to me on one of the east-bound two lanes of an undivided 4 lane blacktop, average speed of traffic about 50 mph. I'm in the (narrow) left lane, meaning about 20 or so inches to my left is oncoming traffic, with a speed relative to me of about 100 mph. He's not just drifting into my lane, but consistently taking up a good few inches of it.

During a break in oncoming traffic, I try to pass quickly, only he speeds up and drifts over a little further, making this all of a sudden a question of wether I will see my kids again. So I break. And, since he may not know what hell he's doing to all us unfortunates sharing the road with him tonight, I tap the horn.

Oops - testosterone alert! Now is apparently the time to do away with the penny-anty lane encroaching - and commit to driving squarely in both lanes. What fun! no one will get by him now! It can't be that much fun, though, since I exit the highway at the very next opportunity. I've learned a long time ago to pick my fights, and this very much isn't worth it. Bye, asshole!

Only later that night, one of those things that makes it harder to continue doubting the existence of a supreme being, or at least a universe with karmic justice built-in - I see the same car in a nearby mall parking lot. It's easily identified by the clever license plate proclaming that this is his Escalade in some kind of vanity plate leet-speak.

And of course, he also parks like an asshole - really close to the car on his right. And the space to his left is open. Mine, by the way, is a company car (emotional attachement = zero). I have some experience in the ensuing manoever, but I have to say, this night is my best work yet. If there were 2 inches between our cars it's a lot. No way he's getting in.

I go off to the bookstore, and almost forget about this. As always, it's slim pickings, but after a good while I find a few books that may be worth my while.
Making my way back to the car, I see him standing there - it may be wishful thinking on my part, but he looks agitated. I get in - and start reading one of my new books. It's a little hard to focus, though, as it is kinda fun watching him from the corners of my eyes (and over the top of my book - depending on where he's pacing at the time). When it looks like he has made up his mind to come over and chat, I start the car. He walks back. I now enjoy reading with the AC running. After a little while, he comes over again, and stands there like an idiot, working up the courage, apparently, to tap my window.
"yes?"
"can you move your car already?"
"Excuse me?"
"I've been waiting here for your car to move, so I can get in"
"Can't you get in on the other side?"
"Um, no. No I can't"
"Wow, those chevvies get bigger every year, huh"
"It's an Escalade"
"Yep, that's a big one too"
"Actually, they just parked too close to me. Can you move your car?"

In my younger years, I'd have gone into a whole discussion on the magic word, but being if not wiser at least older now, I merely oblige.
First, I check my mirrors of course, and adjust my seat, and check my seatbelt's proper operation, and select an appropriate radio station. But, eventually, I drive off. Bye, asshole!

[Cheshire Human]

I was in a bar with a group of guys after a golf outing. Someone said my golf partner was in a fight outside. I jumped in the middle and separated them. It became apparent that they both wanted to fight. I went back in the bar and ordered a beer as they went after each other. I tried.Hey, you violated both Rule #1 and Rule #2! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbMa4MGFCOg)

That was just Golf, though. It doesn't count. Now maybe if he was talking about, you know, <cough>fighting<cough>, you might have a point.

[ExTank]

Nothing as Bad Ass as the OP, but two incidents spring to mind:

In the Fall of '85, I was heading to my high school late one afternoon to pick up some transcripts, and I was stopped due to a train on a two-lane road behind several other cars at a RR crossing in my hometown. A line had formed and I was actually a dozen cars or so back up the road on the other side of a stop-sign intersection about 50 yards up the road from the RR crossing. (http://maps.google.com/maps?hl=en&ll=38.573338,-90.173676&spn=0.001615,0.001733&t=h&z=19&vpsrc=6) The train passes, and cars begin moving forward slowly, stopping at the intersection, before proceeding on and crossing the RR tracks.

Some yahoo from the Big City (St. Louis) decided he wasn't going to wait behind us yokels and begins edging up the left side of the line of stopped cars, effectively creating a third lane in the middle of this two-lane road just for him. The two lanes were wide enough to allow him to do this, as we "locals" often use the extra space as a left-turn lane when needed, but it's a clearly marked double-yellow striped two-lane road. That the yahoo's trying to drive down the center of.

Unfortunately for him, he has to get back into the regular lane due to a largeish truck coming the other way, and I refuse to let him in, the Dick. He goes nuts, and decides to follow me and ride my ass for ther better part of mile, honking his horn, apparently shouting and gesticulating madly. I ignore him, which makes him madder. Knowing that our local high school and a convenience store is ahead at the next intersection, (http://maps.google.com/maps?hl=en&ll=38.56703,-90.165122&spn=0.00323,0.003465&t=h&z=18&vpsrc=6) I begin fake-pumping my brakes and slip my arm out the window and give him the finger. I finally stop abruptly at the stop sign intersection next to my high school, forcing him to jam on his brakes pretty hard to keep from rear ending me, and by now he's fucking insane with rage. He cuts his wheels and pulls around me while I'm sitting there at the stop sign, pulls in front of me to block me from leaving, jumps out of his car to run back to my car and begins trying to open my (locked) car door, presumably to pull me out and do bad things. I'm laughing at him though the window.

Meanwhile, in his rage, he forgot to put his car in park, and it's slowly rolling across multiple lanes of traffic, and into the high school parking lot just as school is letting out.

He suddenly looks up in panic at the sound of a police car siren. There's three cop cars sitting in the parking lot of the convenience store directly to my right. Having graduated from the local high school, I knew that several local cops would gather there for coffee and donuts before starting to direct traffic when the school let out.

One of them was my next-door-neighbor, and a good friend of the family.

I got a warm glow out of watching this guy, maybe early 20's, being bent over the trunk of my neighbor's police car and handcuffed.


------


In January of '98, my employer sent me to Ft. Carson in Colorado Springs to do a month-long project. While heading back to the hotel one night after work, I was rear-ended pretty badly. No serious injury, just stiff/sore for a day or two, but the rental car is totaled. Per company policy, I had declined the rental agency's insurance in favor of our corporate AmEx coverage.

Six months later, I'm working near Pisa, Italy, and received a phone call from corporate about some residual damages to that rental car not covered by AmEx insurance (my employer wasn't looking for money, just clarification on some issues so they could tell the rental agency for me to "get bent").

I meet on the sidewalk cafe in front of our hotel to have some drinks with my coworkers before we head out to dinner, and I happen to mention the car accident (in January; this is now July) and the on-going AmEx/rental agency insurance hassle. In the six months since the accident, our employer had switched from AmEx insurance to some other carrier I can't recall. But "Kevin," an opinionated, overberaing, loud-mouthed asshole I work with, tells me that AmEx is no longer our corporate insurance carrier. I tell him the yes, I know that, and remind him that the accident was in January, when AmEx was the corporate carrier.

He goes ape-shit. I'm a this, a that, I'm something other, and if I didn't think so then I was even more of a this, that, and other. Looking over his shoulder at the occupants at the table behind "Kevin," I says, "Am I? Do tell me more."

"Kevin" goes, if possible, even more ape shit, and between spittle-flecked lips I (and everyone at the patio cafe outside, and inside, our hotel) get a double earfull of how he's the biggest pair of nuts on this continent and how I was going to get my ass kicked up and down the street for daring to dispute his unassailable knowledge of corporate rental inurance policy.

I, and every one of my other coworkers, are staring in wide-eyed disbelief at "Kevin."

But even more so are the occupants of the table behind "Kevin;" a pair of Carabinieri. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carabinieri) Who spoke perfect English, and had heard, and understood, every single loudly shouted word, oath, curse, and threat just issued by "Kevin." They were not amused at the insane, more than a little drunk, loud-mouthed American interrupting their break.

They asked him, with the kind of professional courtesy employed by cops worldwide that essentially says, "Behave and do as we say or we'll beat the ever-loving shit out of you right here and now" to accompany them back to their vehicle. And please, allow us to be putting on these nice metal bracelets while we're at it.

"Kevin" was on a plane stateside the next day.

[jlzania]

I lived in Flagstaff during the mid 70's.
At that time, the bars in town were segregated-you had the regular student bars, the one 'hippie' student bar, the cowboy bars, the Hopi bars and the Navajo bars.
If you found yourself in the wrong one, you were made to feel very uncomfortable.
No immediate threats of violence, just a pervasive sense that you didn't belong.

Flagstaff also had a huge native American pow wow in July when both the Navajos and the Hopis came down from the reservation to rodeo and celebrate at the fair.
It was a big tourist draw.

I was at my normal hang out-the hippie bar-with some friends during pow wow. It was a small place and you usually at least recognized the other patrons.
Two Navajos were sitting at the bar having a beer and minding their own business.
Yes, it wasn't 'their' bar but no one cared.
Three drunken frat types that I had never seen before were also at the bar.
One announced very very loudly "The only good Indian is a dead Indian."
His friends roared with laughter at his wit so he repeated himself at greater volume. And again.
The two Navajos said nothing but it was obvious that they were uncomfortable.

I marched up to Mr. LoudFuckingMouth and demanded an apology. When he refused, I suggested we could take it outside.
I'm not very prepossing as I'm 5'5" and female and LFM snickered at me.
I repeated my demand and he said "Who's gonna make me?"
Then he realized that three rather large male friends of mine had come up and were standing behind me.
Mitch replied "We will. And when you try to throw a punch at her, we're going to pick you up and throw you through the plate glass window next door."
LFM apologized-twice- and left.

[Sea Creature Turner]

I'm a Texan.

[Yadda yadda ... (snip)]

As I recall, I made a pompous speech where I declared my intention to "sue the sumbitch for his goddam grocery cart" :p, but we decided to declare victory and move on.



You must be a lot of fun at parties.

[Sea Creature Turner]

I have the opposite view - I'm not upset that a man who brought most of his ruin upon himself is no longer a menace to society, but gloating about it is just nasty and petty. It's a sad story all around.

This.

[Sea Creature Turner]

Back in college I was working as a cocktail waitress in a large bar on 6th Street in Austin, TX. Uniform was short black shorts, tuxedo shirt, bow tie and at least 3" black heels.



I had to fap before I could read the rest of your post. Thanks, sincerely, for that.

[Muffin]

You must be a lot of fun at parties.

You obviously have no idea how much fun shopping carts can be, for just as they are mobile homse, they are also mobile parties:

http://www.nfb.ca/film/carts_of_darkness/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jbobAObJhoU&feature=related

[Chicagojeff]

Good for you. Maybe there won't be a 5th victim for this guy, if he really hits bottom and decides to change.

I had a patient today who was entering prison after his 5th DUI conviction. On his 5th arrest, he not only drove drunk, but hit a teen on a bike. The kid got some bad road rash and a broken arm, and recovered fully, but still...

Yeah.. totally agree.. My partner at work got ran over on I 285 because of a drunk driver.. He's got so much metal in his legs he can set that damn machine off at the airport. He ended up having to take medical retirement and lost out on a chance to go to OCS..

The guy.. he said on the scene.. "Yeah I'm drunk.. and I didn't have enough...

[JustinC]

I was once stopped at a red light a couple lanes over from a car full of teens that was in the left-hand turn lane. Their green arrow came on but they just sat there oblivious, prompting the driver behind them to tap his horn. Instantly an arm shot out of the teen car's window giving the guy behind them the finger. Almost as instantly his roof flashers came on. If you're going to make obscene gestures to other drivers, it's probably best to notice if they're cops.

I didn't get to see how that episode turned out, but I bet the ensuing dialogue was interesting.

Utterly Priceless!!! :D

[Snarky_Kong]

I had to fap before I could read the rest of your post. Thanks, sincerely, for that.

This isn't Fark.

[Gyrate]

This isn't Fark.Agreed. Here we demand pictures first.

[Cinnamon Imp]

Agreed. Here we demand pictures first.

Now, is that pictures of the fapping, or for the fapping? Just so that we're clear!

[pullin]

pullin, the guilt will be on your shoulders when some poor bastard dents his truck's bumper when a drunk suddenly staggers out from under a bridge. ;)

Priceless! (except now there's beer on my monitor) :D

[Gyrate]

Now, is that pictures of the fapping, or for the fapping? Just so that we're clear!
For, not of. This also isn't 4chan.

[Shirley Ujest]

My little drunk driver story and what I did about it. (http://youtu.be/hRSCStseNfI)

Excellent work.

And for the dopers who have rescued animals from abusive idiots, you get a shiny gold star.

[Shirley Ujest]

I don't really have any Bad Ass stories that are Outlaw Josey Walesish at all.

One time, after a 4th of the July fireworks celebration, we were working our way back through the crowd to the car and a couple of teenage boys were being dickheaded teenage boys by swearing and cursing up a storm. Not fighting, just exercising their right to be teenage douchebags in a public manner.

There were alot of younger kids milling about and these two jackholes were really the center of the parking lots attention.

Alot of Dads were getting ready to beat the snot out of these two boys for their mouths. If my husband gets involved, you will be getting a lecture that will last the length of the bible and you will wish for death. I had to pee, for christs sake.

I shouted over to them, without any forethought at all of what to say, " HEY! There are CHILDREN HERE!" and the two teenage boys instantly became sheepish and apologized in a muddled kinda way.


Another time, at one of our little hometown festivals ( which are pretty lame and can be walked thru in under 20 minutes. But is a social thing for everyone.) some elementary school kids were jacking around in a really obnoxious way and it pissed me off. Since I did alot of volunteer work at the school, it didn't take me more than a few moments to locate their mom or dad in the thick of crowd and go, " Hey, isn't that your little Austin over there throwing trash out of the trash can?" ( Or whatever dickheaded little boy thing the jerkweed was doing at the moment.

The boys all got in trouble and then in school the next day, I let them know I turned them in. One of the perks of living in a small community. Everyone knows everyone else. Of course, that is the disadvantage as well.

[Savannah]

I put my belt back on and continue to the top.
I freakin’ hate litterbugs. Especially in parks.

You're my hero.

[Sister Vigilante]

I'm that girl.

My mother had been sending out blanket status emails while she cared for our ailing grandmother. Although there were three other siblings, she was the only one who would step up, and she wrote "she misses seeing her children for which I give them the grade F".

My cousin replied to all: "if you want to play martyr, that's fine, but just remember who made this bed you're lying in, favorite child that you are. If that truth hurts, so be it... don't pass judgment on my family ever again". (Why yes, I did keep this email from 2002.)

I shot back (to all) with "you should thank that martyr; she's the one who is raising your child." (Which my mother was also doing -- babysitting for days and weekends at a time -- because, well, she IS a martyr.)

Man that caused a shitstorm. I basked in it. Cousin created an email account and pretended to be her mother (my aunt), then said she wouldn't be bringing her kid over anymore so as not to inconvenience my mother. That lasted precisely 2 days before my cousin apologized and the babysitting duties were resumed.

It's not much of a story but it's mine. You don't f*** with my mother.

[msmith537]

One time I punched a guy in the face for mouthing off to me. Does that count?

[chorpler]

People who throw cigarettes out of cars, whether they hit someone or not, deserve to have them tossed back in their laps. How else will they learn to not do that?

"I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS MIDLERRRRRRRR..." (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GgK_NCKrDwc)

[flatlined]

I smoke. I never drop my butts on the ground, I field strip them and put the filter in my pocket. Sure, it makes me smell like an ashtray, but I already do. I live in the land of wildfires and it makes me nuts when I see some idiot in a car toss butts out.

I ride a with a bunch of Marines. They are all too scared of me to toss their butts around. I'm a serious badass when it comes to that. (I'm a small female, btw)

One day, I was riding to work, slowly overtaking a guy in a UPS truck when he threw his butt out the door. It bounced harmlessly off my windshield, but it still ticked me off. At the next light, I pulled my visor up and yelled to the UPS driver that if he didn't pull over right away, I was going to call UPS, give them his truck number and tell them that he was smoking in his truck and littering.

The driver gave me a deer in the headlights look, turned onto the next sidestreet and pulled over. I put my flashers on, parked behind him and then chewed him out for littering, fire hazards and I think I also mentioned that birds and squirrels will eat them, not be able to poop them out and die. After the chewing out, I told him that if he picked up butts for 15 minutes, I would just ride away.

About half way through his 15 minutes, a cop pulled behind me and asked what was going on. I explained that I had caught the driver throwing a butt out of his truck and that now the driver was cleaning up butts as penance. The awesome cop nodded, said that he would stay with lights flashing until the driver was done.

After the driver had done his 15 minutes, I left. I don't know if the cop said anything to him, but I'm quite sure I had scared that driver into at least being more discrete about littering.

[Muffin]

Magnificient!

[Cheshire Human]

Aww, your stories are all good. The best story I have is about a squirrel.

There was this squirrel who would sit up in the tree and chitter at me whenever I went outside for a smoke. I have a (very weak, won't even break skin) BB pistol. I started bringing that out with me and shooting at him whenever he did his "scolding". The pistol wasn't very accurate either. It took me half a dozen times (he'd run when it went "pop") before I finally hit him. While it won't break skin, it will still sting. When I finally got the hit he really ran. From then on, he never scolded me again, he ran. He sometimes fell out of the tree in his haste.

No squirrel fucks with me!

[flatlined]

Muffin, I thought the cop was magnificient too.

Cheshire Human, I wonder if we are related. I have javalina who squeeze between my fence to get to the street and then eat up any plants they can get to. I started running out and shooting them with a paintball gun. I also shoot range cattle. We have the most colorful wildlife anywhere around. I change the colors around depending on my mood and the season, I have orange loaded now.

The javalina used to just charge down my driveway and I could often get 3 or 4 of them. Now they bunch up behind my barn, send one scout out to get splatted and then wait to see if I get bored and go inside before the rest of them run down.

[Baker]

I'm going to regret asking this, because it will show how stupid I am, but what's a javalina?

[mac_bolan00]

you're too obsessed with finesse. if someone pulls an a-hole stunt like that to me, i'll not just tell him off, his mother will be excoriated enough to have me banned from SD. the psych to it is simple: he's an a-hole and he knows it so you're not really risking physical injury. however, this is not advisable for someone who's clearly drunk or doped up. those guys will attack you for no reason.

[mac_bolan00]

javelina is a feral/wild pig, although it's used for domestics in some places. it's called that because romans liked to hunt them with pillums (javelins.)

[Baker]

Thanks mac! That was pretty interesting.

[mac_bolan00]

have to qualify. the accepted application is for north/south american peccaries.

[curlcoat]

"I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS MIDLERRRRRRRR..." (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GgK_NCKrDwc)

Heh, Bette can do no wrong! :D

[flatlined]

I'm going to regret asking this, because it will show how stupid I am, but what's a javalina?

In my opinion, there is a big difference between being stupid and being ignorant. You don't know, so you asked.

http://www.azgfd.gov/h_f/game_javelina.shtml

They are very big pests in the sticks. They do look very funny with pink and blue splotches. The cows show the colors better.

[flatlined]

Mac, I didn't know that was how they were named. Hurray, ignorance fought :)

[Cheshire Human]

I'm going to regret asking this, because it will show how stupid I am, but what's a javalina?

Large, unpleasant little shits. Fortunately, they don't live around me. I'd go after them with the real pellet rifle. 1000 fps, scope sighted, hits in 1/2 a cm, at 30 meters. And kills. I haven't used it on the squirrels in years, because the survivors mostly learned to stay away. So did the crows. I expect the surviving javalinas would be smart enough to learn, too.

ETA: Of course, given their size, that might not be enough. I have a 12 guage, heh, heh...

[mac_bolan00]

Mac, I didn't know that was how they were named. Hurray, ignorance fought :)
maybe not yet. i got the hibbee-jeebees when i did a quick wiki because 'javelina' seems to apply exclusively to the peccary, which is a new world pig-like animal. i was perfectly sure javelina was an old world term. well javelin or jabali has both american spanish and old world spanish meaning to it. jabali in spanish is wild or feral boar (no distinction between sus scrofa and peccary.)

[flatlined]

mac, from what I have been told, javalina are not in the swine family at all. They are giant rodents. I'm still going to tell everyone that they are called javalina because of the Romans.

Small town here, if you start hearing that folks in the land of the sun call wild rats javalina...you will have started it :)

[Peter Morris]

There is a special level of hell reserved for idiots that have seats at the back of the plane, that put their luggage in the overhead bins at the -front- of the plane as they board. Since planes board back-to-front, the people sitting in the first rows of economy may find they have no place for their luggage. Usually this means your luggage gets gate-checked (this is actually my preference when I fly; pick the luggage right outside the airplane door when you get off) but it can mean delays, and it's added uncertaintly and hassle. Two things nobody wants when you travel. Especially if you have kids etc.

All because some douch didn't want to carry his briefcase to the back of the plane.

It's a shitty thing to do, and theoretically, you did not want to do this if I was working your flight.

Because, you see, there are security regulations that say we need to remove any item of luggage if it isn't clear who the owner is.

Theoretically, a flight attendent could wait until everyone was on board, theoretically take the offending piece of luggage down from the overhead bin, then theoretically whisper quietly to the people in the 2 or 3 rows nearby, 'is this your luggage? No? Hmmm, that's a security risk - better take it off the plane'.

Now just imagine the expression on the face of Mr. Big Shot when he gets to New York with his briefcase and suit carrier still in London.



So, if I've got this straight, the story goes like this:

- You see someone put their bags in the wrong bin.

- You COULD say "Excuse me sir, don't you think you should take it to your own seat?" but you just ignore it.

- Other people get on the plane, they find their own bins full of the other guy's luggage. They have no place to put their own luggage, so it gets gate-checked (whatever that means).

- You then remove the offending luggage, AFTER it has already inconvenienced the other passengers.

- You know who the owner is, but you pretend not to know.

- You make a false claim that this is a potential security risk. Other people have to investigate, spend time and trouble to find that it isn't a bomb.

- And then Mr Big Shot arrives at his destination without his papers. What's the effect of that? Perhaps a business deal might fall through. Without that big order, Mr Big Shot's company has to lay off staff. Maybe 20 people lose their jobs because of the papers that go missing, did you ever think of that? Or maybe it's vital evidence that can secure the release of an unjustly accused innocent person. You could be doing anything to anyone.

Is this something you just fantasize about doing "theoretically", or something you actually have done?

If I were your boss, and I caught you doing this, I'd fire you on the spot.

[Malacandra]

Yah, I thought this thread was about badasses, not passive-aggressive nuisances.

[Koxinga]

So, if I've got this straight, the story goes like this:

- You see someone put their bags in the wrong bin.

- You COULD say "Excuse me sir, don't you think you should take it to your own seat?" but you just ignore it.

- Other people get on the plane, they find their own bins full of the other guy's luggage. They have no place to put their own luggage, so it gets gate-checked (whatever that means).

- You then remove the offending luggage, AFTER it has already inconvenienced the other passengers.

- You know who the owner is, but you pretend not to know.

- You make a false claim that this is a potential security risk. Other people have to investigate, spend time and trouble to find that it isn't a bomb.

- And then Mr Big Shot arrives at his destination without his papers. What's the effect of that? Perhaps a business deal might fall through. Without that big order, Mr Big Shot's company has to lay off staff. Maybe 20 people lose their jobs because of the papers that go missing, did you ever think of that? Or maybe it's vital evidence that can secure the release of an unjustly accused innocent person. You could be doing anything to anyone.

Is this something you just fantasize about doing "theoretically", or something you actually have done?

If I were your boss, and I caught you doing this, I'd fire you on the spot.

To further the mental exercise, theoretically this flight attendant might go on to work in London's finance sector, where theoretically he might end up working with the very people he screwed over that way. Who theoretically would never know. Unless, someone, theoretically, posted a little notice on LinkedIn . . .

Aren't theoretical games fun?

For the record, no one theoretically has the intention of doing this. But bragging about something petty and vicious in a message board where one's email is on public display is theoretically not the smartest move.

[cochrane]

mac, from what I have been told, javalina are not in the swine family at all. They are giant rodents. I'm still going to tell everyone that they are called javalina because of the Romans.

Small town here, if you start hearing that folks in the land of the sun call wild rats javalina...you will have started it :)Flatlined, javalina are not rodents at all, in that their teeth do not continuously grow and don't need to be kept worn down by gnawing. Actually, they are in the same order, Artiodactyla, and suborder, Suiformes as pigs. Pigs and peccaries do share a common ancestor going back about 30 million years, but peccaries are in a family of their own, Tayassuidae. Of course, javalinas are a truly wild species and have nothing in common with the feral hogs, which are descendants of the Old World domesticated pigs brought to the New World by the Spanish.

Believe it or not, they are also related to the hippopotamus.

http://www.javelinahunter.com/are_they_pigs.htm

[jharvey963]

More about your subject line than the content, but one of my favorite lines Angel was said by Fred (Frederica):

You know what they say about payback? Well, I'M THE BITCH!

:)

j.

[flatlined]

cochrane, thank you so much! Ignorance fought and all. I should know better than to depend on "everyone knows that" from the old-timers. I guess I just believed it because everyone knows that javalina are big rats.

To the OP, sorry for the high jack.

Sits back to read other stories of badassness :)

[scratch llll]

I was at the party of a friend of a friend with my brother who was pretty hammered. Some ass pushes him over onto a bicycle and he falls in a tangle to the ground and I'm about to rise to go help when I notice a bud is helping already and the ass who did it has come over and sits next to me smirking. It's one of those folding metal chair things so I sit down again and grab the front leg and pull it straight up. Amazingly he stays in the seat for the full 180 like some Wyle E. Coyote cartoon. He falls straight down onto the top of his head. He didn't have time to even uncross his arms. Everybody bursts out laughing.

He jumps up all bad telling me he is going to kick my ass and I just say that the guy he pushed over is my brother and I will be glad to take this beyond the even I figure we are now so he calls me a "brave little shit" and I let that slide so he can save face as everyone is still cackling. I still get folks who come up to me saying "hey you're the guy that flipped Glen on his head".

But it doesn't make me feel better. I wish I had killed him. If I had known then that he and his brother would rape a 3 year old years later I would not have let him slide but how do you know what people are capable of? He is serving two life terms now but it makes me sad beyond expression to know that for one short moment I had the power to have stopped that awful thing from happening to a precious little girl. He might cure cancer at some future point too so you just don't know. I'm nobodys judge and jury either. It's just that I feel an awful sense of hopeless regret and pain over that little girl. Even if it doesn't make sense I feel a personal responsibilty that I somehow failed. And yes I know peodos are people too so STFU. I'm just trying to explain how it bothers me.

[Morgyn]

More about your subject line than the content, but one of my favorite lines Angel was said by Fred (Frederica):

You know what they say about payback? Well, I'M THE BITCH!

:)

j. Winifred, not Frederica. And yeah, she was awesome.

[billfish678]

I've got one. Its me, but not so much being a badass as the story has a funny ending.

My high school was considered one of the worst/roughest in the county. Known for race riots and lockdowns. And here I am in 9th grade, a 110 pound nerd who hasnt been there for even 2 full months yet.

Long story short, for good and various reasons I end up kicking the biggest, baddest, oldest dude in school in the nuts. After the fighting was done, its to the office. I tell the PE teacher my story. He listens intently. He sits there thinking for a bit. Then he says "next time kick harder" :)

While it wasn't some master plan to "prove myself" (it had nothing to do with that) I will say nobody ever bothered me again.

[Terraplane]

There was a gang of Hungarians that wanted their own mob. They realized that to be in power, you didn't need guns or money or even numbers. You just needed the will to do what the other guy wouldn't. After a while, they come into power and then they come after me.

I was small-time then, just running dope. They come to my home in the afternoon, looking for my business. They find my wife and kids in the house and decide to wait for me. I come home to find my wife raped and children screaming. The Hungarians knew I was tough, not to be trifled with, so they let me know they meant business.

One of them cut one of my children's throat.

They tell me they want my territory, all my business. I looked over the faces of my family. Then I showed these men of will what will really was.

I shot my wife and the rest of my kids.

I tell them I would rather see my family dead than live another day after this. I let the last Hungarian go, wait until his wife and kids are in the ground, and then I go after the rest of the mob. I kill their kids. I kill their wives. I kill their parents and their parents' friends. I burn down the houses they live in, the stores they work in. I kill people that owe them money. And like that, I'm gone. Underground. Nobody's ever seen me since. I become a myth, a spook story that criminals tell their kids at night. "Rat on your pop and Terraplane will get you." But no one ever really believes.

[FlyByNight512]

I wish I had killed him. If I had known then that he and his brother would rape a 3 year old years later I would not have let him slide but how do you know what people are capable of?

You didn't let him slide, you stood up to a bully in a way that was appropriate for the incident. Your actions and the actions of others who did the same may have kept enough pressure on him to reduce the number of victims. No shame. And hey, when you develop perfect foresight, let me know. We could do some things with that.

[beowulff]

There was a gang of Hungarians that wanted their own mob. They realized that to be in power, you didn't need guns or money or even numbers. You just needed the will to do what the other guy wouldn't. After a while, they come into power and then they come after me.

I was small-time then, just running dope. They come to my home in the afternoon, looking for my business. They find my wife and kids in the house and decide to wait for me. I come home to find my wife raped and children screaming. The Hungarians knew I was tough, not to be trifled with, so they let me know they meant business.

One of them cut one of my children's throat.

They tell me they want my territory, all my business. I looked over the faces of my family. Then I showed these men of will what will really was.

I shot my wife and the rest of my kids.

I tell them I would rather see my family dead than live another day after this. I let the last Hungarian go, wait until his wife and kids are in the ground, and then I go after the rest of the mob. I kill their kids. I kill their wives. I kill their parents and their parents' friends. I burn down the houses they live in, the stores they work in. I kill people that owe them money. And like that, I'm gone. Underground. Nobody's ever seen me since. I become a myth, a spook story that criminals tell their kids at night. "Rat on your pop and Terraplane will get you." But no one ever really believes.

Well, I believe that the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he did not exist...

[CanvasShoes]

Many decades ago when I was a sweet young lass of 19. My then boyfriend, his best friend and I were in the famous "Koots," aka Chilkoot Charlies http://www.koots.com/ (in those days, the drinking age in Alaska was 19). Now, it's kind of a namby pamby tourist trap, but at the time, it was frequented by some hardcore Grizzly Adam's Real Alaskan(trademark) types, including a local Hell's Angel type motorcycle gang called "The Brothers" (IIRC this gang was eventually grandfathered into the Hell's Angel's and became the Alaska chapter or something).

My BF and his buddy were playing pool, and I was bored out of my mind. Koots wasn't exactly my cup of tea (see rough and tumble reasons above). I wanted to go to the Point or Pierce Street Annex, or one of the many other fine dance halls Anchorage used to have in abundance. But it was their turn, I got to go dancing lots of times, and so I was taking it with good grace and trying to entertain myself the best I could. I asked if anyone had some quarters for the jukebox and at that same moment one of the guys they were playing pool with slapped a couple of quarters down on the edge of the pool table.

I gleefully snapped them up and turned toward the juke when the guy unleashed an absolute BARRAGE of obscenities and insults at me. I hadn't realized they were for the table, not for me. "Oh oops!" I said, and handed them back. But he didn't want any of it, I'd apparently insulted him (in his mind) and by golly he was gonna let me have it. And with me being so very young, his obscene mouth absolutely floored me and left me completely speechless and embarrassed.

My boyfriend was JUST heading toward the guy when his best buddy gently snagged the guy by the shirt sleeve and started saying something very quietly in his ear.

To this day neither my ex-husband (that long ago boyfriend) nor I know exactly what Rick said to the guy, but he was clearly very motivated and impressed by it. He changed from a giant jerk to Prince Valiant in about half a nano-second, apologizing to me profusely, offering up all kinds of quarters, generally falling all over himself to redeem himself in Rick's eyes. SO much so, I had to basically tell him "look, good enough, you're forgiven already".

Rick must have been "that guy" with whatever he said to the guy.

[DragonAsh]

So, if I've got this straight, the story goes like this:

- You see someone put their bags in the wrong bin.

- You COULD say "Excuse me sir, don't you think you should take it to your own seat?" but you just ignore it.

- Other people get on the plane, they find their own bins full of the other guy's luggage. They have no place to put their own luggage, so it gets gate-checked (whatever that means).

- You then remove the offending luggage, AFTER it has already inconvenienced the other passengers.

- You know who the owner is, but you pretend not to know.

- You make a false claim that this is a potential security risk. Other people have to investigate, spend time and trouble to find that it isn't a bomb.

- And then Mr Big Shot arrives at his destination without his papers. What's the effect of that? Perhaps a business deal might fall through. Without that big order, Mr Big Shot's company has to lay off staff. Maybe 20 people lose their jobs because of the papers that go missing, did you ever think of that? Or maybe it's vital evidence that can secure the release of an unjustly accused innocent person. You could be doing anything to anyone.

Is this something you just fantasize about doing "theoretically", or something you actually have done?

If I were your boss, and I caught you doing this, I'd fire you on the spot.

All slightly incorrect. Because if I (theoretically, of course) actually saw the person you can bet your ass we'd say something and Mr Big Shot would be lugging his precious stuff down the aisle to the back like he's supposed to.

But have fun feeling all morally superior and all.

[DragonAsh]

And if you really think anyone would actually take luggage off a plane without making an announcement over the PA system, you're even stupider than initially expected; my days of underestimating the average intelligence of Dopers is certainly coming to a middle.

The last thing we want to do is remove something that is actually important - such as someone's needed medication. But guess what - Mr Big Shot often doesn't say anything, expecting -his- bag to get gate-checked at worse. But when we can't identify the owner, off the plane the bag goes, and it WILL go off the plane. And Mr Big Shot WILL get to where ever he is going without his bags. Tough shit, and it's his own fault for trying to 'get one up' on the system and not speaking up when he had the chance.

Like I said, have fun feeling morally superior and all.

[Koxinga]

Took you a month to come up with that?

[Lucretia]

So you ended up taking a guy who was probably otherwise a functioning member of society and completely destroyed his life? Yeah, that seems like a fair trade for the ding in your truck. And you're even proud of it.

Your actions helped take an educated, employable man and made him into a homeless drunk. You go ahead and gloat all you want, but realize your actions cost society a lot more than his ever did.

I was going to say something very like this. Did this guy have kids? If so, you helped destroy a family, congrats. Did the kids deserve it, too? I wonder what happened to them, and I wonder if what you helped to do their family hurt them, and if maybe it's hurting/will hurt their kids. Letting someone take the natural consequences of their actions is one thing...deliberately destroying someone just for revenge...is a jerk move.

[Annie-Xmas]

I know someone who once fucked with Wilson Pickett's daughter. Pickett slammed him seven ways to Sunday. I wish I'd been there. The guy was a total ass, and once got hit with a gun and physically assaulted by two different people he fucked with.

[MikeF]

A guy in the neighborhood used to walk his dog (off leash) to a point up the hill from our house. He would remain at the top of the hill and the dog would trot down, drop a load and go prancing merrily on his way back up the hill. For whatever reason, (hedges near the sidewalk that prodived a screen?) dogs were alway leaving pile for me or my brothers to run over with the lawn mower or step in. Anyway, one day the dog comes down and my brother was prepared. The dog did his thing out of sight of the owner. My brother grabbed the mutt, scooped the poo into a plastic bag and tied it around the dogs neck. The dog went running back up the hill never to be seen again.

[truthbot]

I once shot a man for snoring.

















With my camcorder because he'd been telling me for YEARS that he didn't snore.

[SeaCanary]

A guy in the neighborhood used to walk his dog (off leash) to a point up the hill from our house. He would remain at the top of the hill and the dog would trot down, drop a load and go prancing merrily on his way back up the hill. For whatever reason, (hedges near the sidewalk that prodived a screen?) dogs were alway leaving pile for me or my brothers to run over with the lawn mower or step in. Anyway, one day the dog comes down and my brother was prepared. The dog did his thing out of sight of the owner. My brother grabbed the mutt, scooped the poo into a plastic bag and tied it around the dogs neck. The dog went running back up the hill never to be seen again.

+1

[muldoonthief]

I was going to say something very like this. Did this guy have kids? If so, you helped destroy a family, congrats. Did the kids deserve it, too? I wonder what happened to them, and I wonder if what you helped to do their family hurt them, and if maybe it's hurting/will hurt their kids. Letting someone take the natural consequences of their actions is one thing...deliberately destroying someone just for revenge...is a jerk move.

You should really read the whole thread, especially this post (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=14373171&postcount=57). All pullin did was make sure the drunk driver paid the judgement that was set by a judge. The drunk was trying to evade his legal responsibilities by changing jobs, moving, etc. Are you saying pullin should have let the guy get away with that? The natural consequences of being a (5 time) drunk driver certainly should include paying full recompense to the people you injured.

[MagicEyes]

I was going to say something very like this. Did this guy have kids? If so, you helped destroy a family, congrats. Did the kids deserve it, too? I wonder what happened to them, and I wonder if what you helped to do their family hurt them, and if maybe it's hurting/will hurt their kids. Letting someone take the natural consequences of their actions is one thing...deliberately destroying someone just for revenge...is a jerk move.I can't believe people are siding with the drunk driver here. The only person who's responsible for the family being ruined is the person who chose to get behind the wheel while he was drunk, and I'm glad to know that at least one drunk driver is actually being punished. Too many drunk drivers get off with just a slap on the wrist. It's good to know at least one drunk driver got what he deserved.

[Magiver]

In HS I stopped a bully from pommeling the class clown and for weeks got shoulder butted in the hallway every time we passed each other. I finally got pissed off and threw my books down and then hit him as hard as I could in the stomach. I mean I hit him hard enough to lift him up and back. I could hear the air rush out of his mouth. He did not go down. I knew it hurt. He had just enough left in him to hit me once. Civility ensued. Best tasting fat lip ever.

[user_hostile]

Ahhhhh...I got nuttin'.

But decades ago, our company relocated us from CA to the DC metro area. We were still settling in after a couple of months (adjusting to the gawdawful traffic, weather...gradually becoming "Virginians". One thing we all had in common was to avoid changing our vehicle registration until the the last possible minute (personal property taxes for a car? Isn't that like...like from the early 1900's?). As we shall see, this can be both an advantage and a disadvantage.

One of the relocation victims I worked with liked to ride his motorcycle back and forth to work. One day (a Tuesday), while waiting to make a left at a light to enter his apartment complex, he gets hits mildly from behind by a young lady driving a subcompact. Not enough to damage the bike, but hard enough that he would have been pushed into a busy intersection, had he not had his brakes on.

He gets off of the bike to confront the lady and get her name, address, insurance, etc... She gets out of her car, yelling at him and smacks him in the head--knocking his visor down. Stunned by her action, he does nothing--she then gets back into her car and drives off. He has just enough wherewithal to get the licence number of fatale près femme. Her plates are from a state out west.

He calls the cops back in the apartment. They show up and tell him that while she most likely committed the alleged felony and battery, it was doubtful they'd ever find her because of those plates; they have no local address to find her at--unless she was pulled over by a cop or got into an accident. (You'll see a lot of out-of-state plates in the area; some people live in DC metro area temporarily and don't bother registering their car in VA or MD) So looking for an out-of-state car would be like looking for a needle in a haystack. My friend is resigned to the fact that there's nothing to be done...but very thankful he wasn't hurt or killed.

The next morning, my friend comes out of the apartment and finds his motorcycle covered with mustard. He is enraged for a couple of minutes. But soon he calms down--the realization comes over him that he still has the final say in this battle with the evil One. For one thing, he also owns a car.

He goes back into his apartment to call his boss and explain that he'll be late and comes back out to clean up his bike. He then gets on his bike, and does a quick stop at a CostCo (that had just open in the area) while on his way to work. When he finishes for that day, he takes his bike to a company storage building and parks it there, telling another relocation victim who runs the joint he'll pick it up in about a month. Catches a ride home from a buddy who followed him. Next day, he take his car to work from now on...

Two days later, late that evening, he and two friends jump into the car with the items from CostCo and conduct a systematic search of the area. They start with a circular pattern and drove through every apartment complex within a two mile radius. After 45 minutes, they find the car with the matching plate numbers...

A mysterious rain of four quarts of motor oil suddenly fell upon the young ladies carriage, along with an Jackson Pollack finale of a rather famous condiment used on hot dogs.

The final huile de grâce was the yellow roof ornament: an empty, extra-large bottle of French's.

[pabstist]

My friend I were in line at McDonald's, and the guy in front of us was hassling a mentally challenged cashier. He actually asked the cashier to turn around so he could see where they put in the key in to wind him up. What a dick, it really bothered me.

We ended up sitting near the exit door. As the guy who fucked with the special employee was walking by to leave, I said "Excuse me sir". He looked at me asked what I wanted. I said straight faced, "Could you please turn around so I can see why you're such an asshole?"

He turned pale and left fast. My friend almost choked on his food. I was nervous leaving and walking into the parking lot, but the guy never stuck around to bother us.

[MacCat]

Two stories, both starring my wife...

Many years ago we took a daytrip to the Catskills, upstate NY. That evening, heading home we were driving up a mountain when another car came up behind and proceeded to tailgate. I was in the right lane going my usual few mph over the limit. I slowed down to encourage him to pass, when he didn't I went back to my previous speed and he stayed right on my bumper. I told my wife to grab a handful of braunschweiger left over from our earlier picnic and I moved into the left lane. I slowed down until he was next to us and my wife put herself out the window to her waist and threw a ninety mph fastball strike that would have brained him had he put his window down. He jammed on his brakes and we saw no more of him. I wonder just what he thought that substance splattered on his drivers side window actually was.

Fast forward to about fifteen years ago. We were driving home on a Friday night from her parents house in two cars. I had our then two year old son in his car seat in the back and she was following. An idiot kid got between us and started extreme tailgating on my car. I despise tailgaters and will deal with them but not with a child in the car. My wife did not have that constraint and pulled up next to him, scaring him to the point he took off and she went after him. Unbelievably, he pulled into the police precinct a few blocks from our house. He jumped out of his car and ran in. He told the desk sergeant this crazy woman was chasing him. She explained what was happening. He asked the kid if he had been drinking. "A few beers" he answered and was promptly entered into the arrest procedure.

[Chimera]

That's pure awesome.

[Alice The Goon]

Last week, my son and I were at McDonald's and the police were there talking to some of the employees. Apparently, we had just missed all the action. Two of the McDonald's employees, teenaged boys, had been in a car on the way to work, and one of them leaned out the window and screamed, "Stop smoking, bitch!" (rich kids on the eastside have a different idea of delinquency) to a woman in a car passing by. Her husband followed them to McDonald's, where he went inside and yelled at the kid and scared the shit out of him, and then he went out into the parking lot and smashed the windshield of the kid that was driving. I heard the cop that interviewed the kid tell him that if he yelled at and insulted his wife, he might do the same thing.

[Clothahump]

I have a scorpian shaped scar on my shoulder that to this day reminds me to never start no shit. Finish it if you must, but never start.

Truer words have never been spoken.

[JBDivmstr]

Damn! Where do I start?! :smack:
Well, I've obviously stumbled into this thread a little 'late'! (Ya think?!) ;)
And seeing as how twickster has already put the kibosh on the whole cigarette butt thing, I'll refrain from commenting on that.

Taking pleasure in someone falling that low is, well, low. He probably did bring it on himself, and one could certainly argue he deserved it. That doesn't mean that glee at his fate is appropriate.

Yes. If he had deliberately, rather than accidentally, throw the cigarette at you, he would be guilty of it. Just the same when you throw it back. As I said, two wrongs don't make a right, and your action was significantly more wrong than his.
That's not to say he shouldn't have dropped it in his ashtray - of course he should.-5
No, it wasn't "significantly more wrong than his."
Maybe "two wrongs don't make a right", but three lefts do! :D

People who throw cigarettes out of cars, whether they hit someone or not, deserve to have them tossed back in their laps. How else will they learn to not do that?+1

Ah, vigilantism. Hurrah :rolleyes: Or they could, you know, be fined for littering by the people who actually have the right to impose a punishment. That is, not you.
Paging Mr. Steophan! Paging Mr. Steophan! Your seat in the Pit is now ready. Paging Mr. Steophan, please come to the Pit. Your seat is now ready.

Nope, training. If someone gets punished for doing something wrong right away, they are less likely to repeat the transgression.
Piffle. Cops have better things to do than chase down butt throwers.
My car doesn't have an ashtray - my husband uses an empty can. Lack of an ashtray is zero excuse.
+1

Originally Posted by Nzinga, Seated
I have a scorpian shaped scar on my shoulder that to this day reminds me to never start no shit. Finish it if you must, but never start.
+1

Truer words have never been spoken.
I'm with ya' on that, Clothahump!

[Gyrate]

Last week, my son and I were at McDonald's and the police were there talking to some of the employees. Apparently, we had just missed all the action. Two of the McDonald's employees, teenaged boys, had been in a car on the way to work, and one of them leaned out the window and screamed, "Stop smoking, bitch!" (rich kids on the eastside have a different idea of delinquency) to a woman in a car passing by. Her husband followed them to McDonald's, where he went inside and yelled at the kid and scared the shit out of him, and then he went out into the parking lot and smashed the windshield of the kid that was driving. I heard the cop that interviewed the kid tell him that if he yelled at and insulted his wife, he might do the same thing.Nice. Glad to see the police are advocating vandalism.

Yes, the kid was being an asshole and following him to McDonalds to yell at him was well warranted. But smashing the windshield? That's crazy. And the police officer agreeing with it (albeit unofficially)? That's crazier.

[Scarlett67]

This story is third-hand or whatever . . .

Years ago Mr. S's friend Ron is sitting in a bar with some friends. Now Ron is built like a Mack truck, but he's really a teddy bear. Nice guy.

There's a little guy down at the end of the bar by himself, nursing a beer and minding his own business.

Some drunks decide to start hassling Little Guy with offers to mix it up outside, etc. He ignores them, but they keep it up.

Finally Ron quietly catches their attention (still seated): "If he goes outside, we go outside with him."

They back off.