Berke Breathed Appreciation Thread

[Lute Skywatcher]

I've been meaning to do this for a while. We've had similar threads for Mel Blanc, I think we should do one for Berke too.

Naturally, the phrases that have stuck in my mind are all from Opus:

The Right Guard is a wee bit chilly this morning.

Someone please give the TelePrompter a swift kick!

Pear pimples for Hairy Fishnuts!

[deb2world]

I loved Bloom County. I have many of his books and enjoy reading them.

My favorite strips were when Opus when on a diet. Liposuction for the nose, hehe. "How about diet and exercise".

Or how about the early strips with Cutter John and all of the gang on the wheel chair pretending to be Star Trek characters. That stuff was great.

[Simetra]

Breathed is ultra-super-schway!

I love Bloom County, wasn't a big fan of OutLand tho'. Matter of fact, I have every Bloom County book ever written. I've read them so many times, you could show me the first panel of any strip, and I could quote almost verbatim the rest of the strip. :)

Now where is lolagranola at?

"Dab some listerine on the ol' pits. A little Right Guard for the breath... Yeah... I'm a little nervous."

;)

[Zyada]

I have several of his books, plus I've several strips that I cut out from the paper.

Opus is watching Mr. Rogers.
Mr Rogers: "Can you say civil servant?"
Opus: "Bozo"

Opus has been having nightmares about McD's serving penguin burgers, so he asks the counter person if they serve that.
"McNope, but Mcmaybe mclater!"

Also

"Offensensitivity"

*sigh* one of the best

[Totoro]

"Folks, he died of Acne."

[snac]

"A boy and his penguin!"

"A penguin and his boy!"

"Two dips and a dad."

That one, and the Pac-Man in the bar...

[Odieman]

I have an Opus christmas ornament on my divider behind my computer at home....Bloom County was my favorite strip, I too had all the books..."smelling faintly of herring"
"like the toes of Casper Weinberger"

Keith

[jmullaney]

All I wanted was directions to the restroom. -- Opus

Oops, forgot to carry the two. -- um... that genius kid

[Zanshin]

I agree - Berke Breathed is one of the most talented and intelligent cartoonists of our time (IMHO) and is well-deserving of an appreciation thread.

The only one that springs to mind is Steve Dallas:

Where's the BOURBON???!?!?! (as a diaper-clad toddler)

"Berkley, Broads and Buckley." (after being asked what the three "R"'s are, and replying with the three "B"'s)

My all-time favorites have to be the Starship Enterpoop strips... aaaaahhhh, good times.

[Lute Skywatcher]

Of course! The McD's strips! My favorite of those features Opus & Mr. Limekiller patiently listening to the teenager rattle off the menu, then deciding, "Let's go get a McPizza!"

Then there's Steve's heavy metal band with Opus playing "weighty brass". When Rosebud saw Opus dressed like a member of KISS, the following exchange resulted:

Rosebud: "The Hottentots are running amok!"
Opus: "No, it's just us. Band practice broke up early."
Rosebud: "The Hottentots are running amok in the music business."

[Ethilrist]

Cutter John to attractive blond on a cold day: "Mng li ah floza! Floza!"
Opus translates: "He says his lips are frozen."

Steve Dallas's first rule of successful litigation: Never sue poor people. They don't have any money.

[Tequila Mockingbird]

Bill's bazooka-barfing.

"Opus this my.." "BOOMERS BLOOPERS BLESSERS BOSOMS"

Hey, there's a gopher wetting on my foot. Bad dog, Rambo...BAD DOG!

And Steve Dallas turning into a giant can of Spam....

[mighty_maxx]

Man I loved Bloom County. Binkley's Anxieties was a favorite as was the strip where Opus beat the mimes to death with a stick of pickle loaf..hehe.

[Myron Van Horowitzski]

Loved the cockroaches.

"Imperialist pig! Give us some wheaties!"

"One more step and we lick the pot roast!"

"It means Flora just laid her eggs in your underwear drawer!"

[Kyberneticist]

Transcribed from library check-out.

Milo vs Opus
(Bloom County Meadow, candidates on stools before podiums. Sign which reads "to
Day: Practice Debate")
Milo: I understand that my opponent supports the 55 M.P.H. speed limit.
Opus: Saves 500 lives a year! I fully support saving lives.
Milo: Then he'd support the saving of another 10,000 lives by lowering the limit to 40 M.P.H.
Opus: 40?
Milo: Or to 20 ... Saving 30,000 lives a year.
Opus: Gee... 20 is pretty slow.
Milo: Apparently my opponent would send 30,000 men, women, and children to fiery, mangled deaths just so he can zoom along to his manicurist at 55.
Opus: I DON'T HAVE A MANICURIST!
Milo: He probably doesn't. Most mass murderers don't. Hitler didn't.
Opus: stop it! Stop It! STOP IT! (bangs on podium)
Milo: Rebuttal?
Opus: (frazzled) What?
Milo: Give your rebuttal.
Opus: Uh... Bush is a wimp.
(Opus' washroom, opus in tub in technicolor rub-a-dub hair shield)
Narrator: The candidate retires to the tub...comforted in the knowledge that even "The Gipper" never really sounded totally sober without note cards, either.

[Kyberneticist]

http://www.pvponline.com/rants_breathed.php3
Two part interview with Berke by a couple of online cartoonists.

[Skott]

I'm still waiting for the Bloom County movie starring Arnold Schwarzenegger as Opus to come out :)


I've read the books so many times over and over again that I really need to go out and buy the complete collection again. Pages falling out. Complete sections missing. It's pretty sad.

I do have a comic ... or rather original art ... hanging outside my cube here. It has Oliver is his quest for the long-tailed hamster shouting out "But the calculations were correct!!". Being a programmer, I understand the feeling very well.

I wish my record of Billy and the Boingers still worked :(

[Skott]

From http://www.in2itonline.com/index.php3?pagetype=article&title=breathed


Chris: Are all the Bloom County strips that have appeared in newspapers available in your collections? If not, how did you decide which of your strips would be included the books?

Breathed: All are there. Except for the first year... which all stunk and I buried them.


Now, I know that's not true. At one point, I actually was cutting the comics out of the paper and putting them in my own day by day scrapbook (me? fanatical??? nevah!). When the book that contained those strips came out, the published strips were in a different order, some of the wording had been changed, and there weren't as many.

One specific example was when Oliver built a working model of an atomic bomb for his science project. That series lasted at least a couple days; however, only one strip ended up in the book ("Okay everybody, fire drill!" - "Keep your jets cooled, I got the safety on.").

[Show_Biz]

Berke Breathed's attraction has always escaped me.
I know that he got a boost from "replacing" the far surperior Calvin & Hobbes strip, but after that I cannot fathom his continued popularity.

[Grok]

Bloom County rocked, until Breathed started to get fanatical about the animal rights stuff. But even with that he did some funny stuff.

One of my favorite characters, who unfortunately appeared VERY rarely, was Luther Henry Putgrass the ranting TV reparirman. His was hilarious, but I won't attempt to quote his ramblings here.

[Padeye]

Sheesh Show Biz. What cocroach whizzed on your stale Dolly Madison cupcake? :D

I started out not liking the strip, accusing it of being a clone of Doonesbury. I obviously hadn't read the strip that much to make a comment like that. There are some 'toonists still out that copy his drawing style if not content, Michael Fry comes to mind. Did anyone see the animated Opus Christmas special besides me?

[beagledave]

I went to college in Iowa City, Berke's early hometown..needless to say Iowa Citians are required by penal code to think he is cool..many of the references in his early cartoons are from Iowa City stores or landmarks.

In the Iowa City library is a signed color print of Opus reflecting on how much he will miss Iowa City (done when Berke moved west)...he names all the things he loves...But then says "except for the water..it tastes like Spic n Span" ......which is spot on <shudder>

I have a regular Opus doll and a reindeer Opus...and there is a "Thpppt" cartoon of Opus in my web site.

[Billy Rubin]

"..So he folded up his tongue and he moved to malibu"
".. A Klingon has beamed aboard our ship!
An UGLY klingon"
"..Let's beam Mr Spock into a wall"
"Do I kiss like a gagging goldfish?"
"I strongly suspect you're percolating my hormones"

If you could take a Polaroid of my Innner Child, it would probably look like Bill the Cat. At least, that's what it feels like.

Billy.

[Ringo]

Geez, really Show_Biz, thank you so much for sharing....

Berke Breathed attended the University of Texas over the same course of time that I did and his The Academia Waltz strip was my companion in the Daily Texan.

I loved it from the start, and it was a direct progenitor of Bloom County; Steve and Opus and all. He went national about the right time to catch the wave that was released when Trudeau's Doonesbury yielded humor to jaundice.

I'll admit Outland didn't really work for me. Anybody else remember the baby alligator(s) incident?

[detop]

And let's not forget the Banana conputer.

To this day I threaten non-complying appliance to turn them into toasters.

Except for the toaster, which I threaten to turn into a popcorn machine :D

[detop]

Detop said :
And let's not forget the Banana conputer.

Of course you should read computer above :o

Note to myself
Always check spelling before posting. Whack ! Thank you, Master.Always check spelling before posting. Whack !...

[andygirl]

Lest we forget the dangers of eating dandilions...

[MsRobyn]

And who could forget the UFOs and aliens? "We have Elvis. Alert Ted Koppel".

Or the Meadow Party, which fielded candidates in '84 and '88?

Or when Steve was abducted and turned into a progressive liberal?

*sigh*

::goes off and lies in the dandelion patch::

Robin

[LindyHopper]

Steve: Somebody tell me what could be worse than being dumped by a dame for another schlep?

Opus: Being eaten by a walrus.



Milo: Jazz with vegetables. Hold the meat.



"The Earth isn't round either. Yep! It's shaped like a burrito!"

"Death to the great hated satanistic homeowner tyrant!!"

"Long live the glorious cockroach rebellion against the great suburban bourgeois oppressor swine-pig!!"



Oh, yeah. Bloom County. Genius. Named one of my dogs after Milo Bloom (my favorite character).

[Lux Fiat]

"Off with his head."
"We can't do that, Tippy!"

"Snugglebunnies! Snugglebunnies! Snu--"

"Opus, she's an alien transvestite robot."

"I, for one, fully support penguin lust!"
"That's great, but today's topic is 'nun-beating'."
"Good Lord, man, I can't support that."

"Devil bunnies! I snort the nose, Lucifer! Banana! Banana!"

I know that he got a boost from "replacing" the far surperior Calvin & Hobbes strip, but after that I cannot fathom his continued popularity. Actually, Bloom County was around for years before Watterson started doing Calvin and Hobbes, and I think even Outland was done by the time Watterson packed it in.

[Lute Skywatcher]

I realize that a comic strip isn't the best place to look for continuity, but I did have a problem with one huge plot hole involving the airborn wheelchair. Why blame Opus for not bringing a can opener? He was there by accident!

[andyman]

::Opus steps out of the shower after a rousing rendition of "Pappa Don't Preach", towels off his hair leaving a spikey mess, sees Milo and exclaims "HI!"::

Milo to Opus: A come hither beauty, you ain't.

[Spoons]

A friend: "Whatcha got there, Spoons?"
Me: "Latest Bloom County collection. Just picked it up."
Friend: "Bloom County? Why don't you read Doonesbury? That's a thinking man's comic."
Me: "Bloom County is a thinking man's Doonesbury."

Seriously, I miss Bloom County. Some of my favourite lines (paraphrased, I don't have my books handy):

Opus: "And ten thousand penguins would gently roll backwards on their butts.... If ten thousand people do a stupid thing, it is still a stupid thing."

Opus, relaxing in bed on a Sunday morning: "I guess the world can get along without me until, say, noon...."
Milo, beside Opus' bed, with assorted others holding trash can lids, pots, pans, etc: "Ready...?"

And lets not forget Opus ordering the products he's seen on TV: "It mooshes! It squooshes! And don't forget the turnip twaddler...."

Oliver hacks into Pravda and rearranges the next day's headline: "Gorbachov sings tractors! Turnips! Buttocks!"

I could go on, but I'll leave with this one, for a rainy day:

"I'd never cry if I did find
A cracker in my soup.
Nor would I mind a porcupine
Inside a chicken coop
Yes, life is fine when things combine
Like ham in beef chow mein
But oh, this time I think I mind,
They've put acid in my rain."

(Sorry if the quotes are not exact; I'm working totally from memory here and it's been a while.)

[Chef Troy]

I've raised this issue before to bewildered silence but I think I've finally found the right crowd to pose this question to.

Is it just me, or does anyone else see a suspicious, perhaps even infringing resemblance between W.A. Thornhump, the sniveling pointy-haired corporate-toady CEO of Bloom County Inc., and the Pointy-Haired Boss in Dilbert?

[The Devil's Grandmother]

Perversely, two of my favorite strips are about Steve, whose real-life counterparts I loathe.
He’s just finishing a date with Quiche “So, how about it?” *whap* “I’m not that kind of girl!” “You most certainly are!”.
Steve, after the aliens changed him into a kinder, gentler Steve. “Eat the peas.” They’re covered in butter” “Eat Lead”.
Last weekend I used the phrase caterwauling cockroaches while on a date. Dateboy didn’t get it. Damn. He was kinda cute.

[Lute Skywatcher]

I have the Dilbert 20th Anniversary book at home. Scott Adams put plenty of stuff in there, I wouldn't be surprised if he mentioned a resemblance. I'll have to check.

[Skott]

I do think that the longer Opus' nose got, the worse the strip got :(


Some more of my favorites:

Early 80s strips where Opus goes campaigning at college campuses, and instead of finding rampant liberalism, finds conservatives running in with signs like "I love dough" and "Nukes? Sure!"

Late 80 strip where Opus is out again on the campaign trail, speaking to the Association of Blind, Left-Handed Dentists With Kidney Stones (or whatever): "In short, gentlemen, I need your votes. Both of them."

"The beer was cheap and a baby piddled on my tie!"

"Two dopes, a bird, a cripple, and a black... what'd I say?"

"Next time we won't hold back... yes, leaflets!" "No, not the rough stuff!!"

Steve and Bill being held hostage in a cab: "Death to everything American! I demand a new constatution." "Are you kidding, we'll be here forever!" "S'okay, I got Big Macs, Coke..."

"Vous lobes de soreilles sont comme tete de possion" (You're earlobes resemble fish heads - I forget the exact French)

"It's a faster-than-light warp drive!" "Sears had a sale."

[Bean Counter]

When I got you in my back seat
I tried to make my move
But I had to roll down the windows
to keep my face from turning blue!
Way-O way-o! YOU STINK! but I love you...

[Jodi]

LUX alluded to my favorite, but didn't set it out so . . .

[TOTALLY PARAPHRASED]

Milo Bloom is sitting on his desk at the Bloom Beacon when the phone rings.

"Bloom Beacon!"
"Yes, this is Mrs. Billsby."
"Oh, hello, Mrs. Billsby, how are you?"
"I'm fine, dear, just a little touch of arthritis. But you folks have printed that I died."
"Well, let's check the obituaries . . . I don't see anything. Why don't you read it out to me?"
"BILLSBY SLASHES FOUR, DIES IN COCAINE BRAWL"
"Oh, that's on the FRONT page."

And I liked the strip where Steve takes the school kids to the bar for a field trip: "Gnomes!" "AAAGH!"

[aviddiva]

Granted, Outland was a little too over the top after the winningly... well, domestic flavour of Bloom County (they were all a big family, after all), but I did get a kick out of the one outlining the differences between sophisticated art types and the rest of us slobs:
Art type: nostril ring; liquid breakfast.
Opus: nostrils ringed with breakfast liquid.

Favorite Breathed moments:

Truffles: "...I yearn to shout and and dance about...and stick pickles in my honker."
Ronald Ann: "--Wait a minute."

Milo: "Mama, keep dem atoms whole."

Any evening scene involving Binkley and his anxiety closet or Binkley and his father, especially the one that ends "Right. Power, Brother!".

Milo and his grandfather using "liberal calls" when hunting that dying breed, the Liberal ("No Nukes! No Nukes!" "Socialized Medicine")


(Skott: "Vos lobes d'oreilles sont comme tetes de poissons."--pas vos lobes d'oreilles... Les lobes d'oreilles de Madame Bloom.)

[Lute Skywatcher]

20 years!? Oops, must have gotten Dilbert confused with something else. Well, if there's anything about a resemblance in Seven Years of Highly Defective People, it's not in the "boss" section.

Found W.A. Thornhump in the "strike" series. Thornhump with contacts, thinner, and hair pointed straight up would be close to Dilbert's boss.

[mbh]

"SEEN any?" (Fundamentally Oral Bill guarding against Penguin Lust.)

Deathtongue's tender ballad Love Rhino.

"Good warfare is good football, sister ... Figure this: ya got yer combat unit, yer general havoc and mayhem and of course ya got yer enemy! Ah ... here comes a little dogface,now. Damage report, Private."
"A Bolshevik halfback stepped on my head, Sir."

I think my favorite storyline was when Lola Granola introduced Opus to her parents and her ex-boyfriend.

[dwtno]

I can truely say that I read every single Bloom County, from the first strip to the very last. Bloom County was syndicated by the Washington Post Writers' Group (their first attempt at distributing a comic strip). Strip #1 was published in 1982, which found me living in the DC suburbs. When I went to college, I actually had my sister clip the strip and send it to me. Eventually the New Orleans paper picked it up and I got my fix firsthand.

Speaking of which... anyone remember how The Bloom Beacon became The Bloom Picayune? Breathed was here in New Orleans for a cartoonists' convention. After noting the name of our local paper, The Times Picayune, he decided to rename the Bloom County rag, saying something to the effect of: "Any paper that can call itself [/i]Picayune[/i] and still be taken seriously deserves to be honored."

Padeye, absolutely saw the Christmas special - A Wish For Wings That Work. Hell, I even have it on laserdisc! It was actually an Outland animated special. I recall great debates at the time as to whether anyone could possibly give a voice to Opus that even remotely matched the one in our heads. In the end, I think they did a good job.

Skott, thanks for jogging the part of my brain that remembers useless crap. That would be "The Society of Blind, Left-Handed Dentists Without Tonsils." God, I hope Regis asks me this stuff when I finally make it onto Millionaire.

"Herring Whopper, Heavy Mayo... Hold the Head!"
- Opus at Burger King

"In my dreams,
you're all I sees,
boobs, butt and knees
be my main squeeze"
- Steve Dallas' love sonnet to Bobbi Harlow

[matt_mcl]

Announcer: And now, Fundamentally Oral Bill reveals the ultimate moral threat to our immoral society. And now, here's Oral.
Bill: Hello. Ahem. PENGUIN LUST!!! Nothing but URGES FROM HELL!
Opus: Well, this is a fine how-do-you-do.

[matt_mcl]

Operator: Hello, I'm from the bureau of nosy statistics. What is your height? weight? pants size? and sexual preference?
Opus: 2'11. 36 lbs. I don't wear any pants. And svelte, buoyant waterfowl.
Operator: Thank you.
Opus: No problem. ...They're either going to arrest me or fire her.

[Lux Fiat]

Originally posted by mbh
"Good warfare is good football, sister ... Figure this: ya got yer combat unit, yer general havoc and mayhem and of course ya got yer enemy! Ah ... here comes a little dogface,now. Damage report, Private."
"A Bolshevik halfback stepped on my head, Sir.""Permission to kill myself, sir."
"DENIED."

"What do we want to do?"
"Live to see puberty!"

[Rilchiam]

I love "Offensensitivity" as well. I also like the Sunday strip where Opus says, "AUgh! I dropped my ice cream cone on my foot! I am so blasted UNLUCKY!" Oliver proceeds to list the odds against Earth supporting life, flightless waterfowl existing, Opus' parents mating, and Opus' extreme good fortune to be standing in the meadow with ice cream on his foot. Of course, the odds are 1:1 in favor of Oliver wearing the remaining scoop by the last panel...

Mr. Rilch likes the one where Steve Dallas' client trips out in the courtroom, while Steve stands slumped, with his chin in his shirt pocket, thinking, "I could pimp..."

Dunno what you mean by "replacing" C&H, Show_Biz: BC debuted three years before C&H, and Outland ended shortly after C&H did. I seem to remember that it was a triple whammy: Calvin, Outland, and the Far Side all ended within a very short time span. This, of course, left Scott Adams licking his chops, as the field was then wide open for Dilbert.

And Jeff Olsen, Dilbert was around for a long time before it was popular. It wasn't until the '90s that Adams found his niche and focused exclusively on office gags, but I remember seeing Dilbert in the '80s. May not be 20 years, but close to it.

[Lucki Chaarms]

Ooooh goody!
I love Berke Breathed, and I always feel so alone in this, the other high-schoolers have never heard of bloom county.

I've always loved the one where Opus is watching TV and Sam the news reporter freaks out.

TV: "Live from the white house, here is Sam"
Sam on TV: "I got dem happy feet, shuffle right down Pennsylvania street, etc."
Opus: "I think Sam has freaked out"
TV: "We're sorry, apparently Sam has freaked out"

Also, I get a bizarre kind of comfort from the strips where Opus takes a dandelion break.

And get this: I'm so pathetic I get choked up whenever I see that last strip, where it shows all the familiar Bloom County places, devoid of life, and Opus is lugging his stuff away, not even looking back at us.

Oh Berke... why did you leave us?

I feel the same way about Bill Watterson. Why did Calvin and Hobbes have to end?

::siiiiiiigghh::

Opus, Steve, Milo, Rosebud and Cutter John, please bring back your happy little 80's political world.

Berke, could you do just one more book? It'd make my year. But alas, it is not to be.

Bye,

MarxBoy

[Lucki Chaarms]

::Laughing really hard::

Just came across this strip.

http://www.neosoft.com/~bloom/sunday1.jpg

Oh man.

"Methinks this does not bode well"

Gotta love Opus.

Also the time he orders the complete works of "Yodelin' Joe" or someone like that, then apologizes to the operator tells her he got carried away and to cancel the order, then hangs up the phone and says

"Actually Yodelin' Joe's music would gag a goat"

Great mental image.

[LindyHopper]

Just so MarxBoy doesn't get labeled a thread-killer (jeez, what a downer! :D), I'm going to post more of my favorite quotes.

Cockroach: So push the button, you suicidal goons! We're indestructible! (Opus steps on him.)


Binkley: Pop, you think pantyhose commercials are a threat to the family.


(Scene: Opus is sleeping in the meadow; the nuclear power plant is in the background, and various noises are coming from it.) Whirr! Click...Poing! Snap!

Oops.

Opus: (Waking up) Hello.



Otis Oracle (at the book burning): Well! Have some foul and vile records there, knave?

Milo: You bet.

Otis: All right! Light 'em up!!

Milo: Where's the Donny Osmond pile?


OK, OK, one more and I'm gone. Jeez, I could go on all day.


Milo: (during a neighborhood softball game) Mrs. Albaghetti! Stop chasing that ballplayer! He's not Benito Mussolini!!

[thinksnow]

How amazing, I was just reading "One Last Little Peek" this afternoon, then I stumble across this thread...

Great stuff. Never fails to make me laugh. Him and Waterson, both.

[Kyomara]

The series about homosexuality thinly disguised as a series about penguin lust.

Recasting the airline worker strike with Santa's elves.

Genius.

And Outland was great...what are you guys talking about? I remember the one where Opus and Steve go out to dinner. After the usual "smoking or non-smoking?" the waiter starts asking them about their racial background, ending with "ancestors kicked butt?" To which Steve responds "Yeah!!"

Last frame shows them sitting in the oppressive white male section. Opus leans over to a black woman sitting in the next session and says "may I borrow the salt?" to which she replies "apologize."

[Tygr]

Well, Dad, I guess it's safe to say we're not a couple of short, overweight, French-speaking, Hindu, Communist, gay, black women. Nope, racially, ethnicly, physically, sexually, and gender-wise, we're hopelessly in the majority. For crying out loud, we're not even in the Moral Majority minority! And there's darn few of us left! Y'know what that makes us?

A minority.

Right. Power, brother.

[Winnowill]

I have all but one of the Opus dolls that were released (I have the graduate, the shower, penguin lust, the reindeer, a Hawaiian one, and the standard "plain"). And I have every book there is. I still enjoy his commentary on the time Reagan called him when he was in the shower: "I still regret not saying 'I think I should tell you, sir, that I'm not wearing any pants.'"

Opus: "I am at one with my brothers on this spaceship earth!" (Looks down at Milquetoast the cockroach) "Except for stupid cockroaches!" Stomp, stomp, stomp. Last frame - lying on the floor "Moral failures are such a bummer."
Milquetoast: "Brother, you're on my weiner."

Lola Granola: "It just doesn't SOAR, darn it!"

"Even their uzis are pink!"

To this day, I ask people "How goes the great cockroach revolution?" Nobody except my brother, with whom I share a brain, has ever responded with the correct line: "Gloriously, Ahmed, gloriously!"

[PatrickM]

My favorite strip of all time, set during the 1984 American Meadow Party Convention:

Binkley: I mean, the Presidency! Wow! Leader of the free world! Global destruction at his fingertips! And we nominated a dead cat!! A DEAD CAT!! Maybe we should have found someone with a more appropriate background! A more experienced background...MILO! WE SHOULD HAVE FOUND AN AMIABLE OLD EX-B MOVIE ACTOR!!"
Milo: Don't be ridiculous.
Binkley (burying his face in his hands): Oh, Milo, we should have called Fred MacMurray.

My second favorite strip:

Milo, on the phone, taking notes: Senator, will you confirm that you sunk Jimmy Hoffa in your backyard pond?
Senator: What? Of course not!
Milo: Fine. I'll go with "Sen. Bedfellow denies that pond is where he sunk Hoffa."
Senator: That's Not True!
Milo: OK, "Bedfellow DID sink Hoffa in pond."
Senator: I DON'T KNOW WHERE HOFFA IS!!
Milo: "I lost the body", says Bedfellow."

[Lute Skywatcher]

To this day, I ask people "How goes the great cockroach revolution?" Nobody except my brother, with whom I share a brain, has ever responded with the correct line: "Gloriously, Ahmed, gloriously!"

Even I couldn't do that, and I started this thread!

My second favorite strip:

Milo, on the phone, taking notes: Senator, will you confirm that you sunk Jimmy Hoffa in your backyard pond?
Senator: What? Of course not!
Milo: Fine. I'll go with "Sen. Bedfellow denies that pond is where he sunk Hoffa."
Senator: That's Not True!
Milo: OK, "Bedfellow DID sink Hoffa in pond."
Senator: I DON'T KNOW WHERE HOFFA IS!!
Milo: "I lost the body", says Bedfellow."

Now, that just made my day. :D

[Zyada]

Damn, I'm getting misty reading this thread.

The reason why W.A. Thornhump, the CEO of Bloom County Inc., and the Pointy-Haired Boss in Dilbert look similar is because they are based on the same people type - the older, overweight good-old-boy boss with the 3/4 natural tonsure. If you look at the early days of Dilbert, the PHB has your basic curly fringe. He has evolved to his present day 'do.

Ah yes, the glorious cockroach revolution.

There's another one I don't remember too well - Milo or maybe Opus is trying to get a demonstration going and is talking to some sorority girls. Their response is "We're talking husbands on the hoof here"

[Winnowill]

Originally posted by Zyada
There's another one I don't remember too well - Milo or maybe Opus is trying to get a demonstration going and is talking to some sorority girls. Their response is "We're talking husbands on the hoof here"

Ah, the nuclear disarmament rally. "You mean like a pep rally?" "Sorry, we've got a mixer with the Delts Saturday." "Delts?" "A fraternity. Real hunks!" "We're talking the survival of man on earth, here!" "And I'm talking husbands on the hoof."

Slightly paraphrased, 'cause I don't have the book handy. That's the same story line that had them going to college campuses, because they were supposedly "hotbeds of liberalism." Fraternity response: "Midget commies."

Yep. That's why I can't find my car keys, folks. Brain's full of comic strips, old song lyrics, and the screenplay from "The Holy Grail."

[Iguana Boy]

Ah, Bloom County - the greatest comic strip of all time, with Calvin & Hobbes a close second. I like Outland too, not so much in its own right, but more because it has the same characters, and a similar sense of humour.

I have a penguin lust Opus toy by my computer as I type.

Milo: That's right...Bill has agreed to sell Nabisco one of his Boingers songs as a TV jingle for $12 million
Steve: No! (To Bill) You've made us rich?!
Milo: Steve, you gave up your subsiduary percentage when you rewrote their contracts in jail last week.
Steve: You've sold us out?!

Care Bears always care for drinkin' and cuttin' loose!

Pure genius....

[Nymysys]

Ah, Berke, we hardly knew ye. I have great appreciation for Doonsbury, Calvin & Hobbes and the Far Side (and Bizarro still makes me giggle insanely), but damn, if I could have anything back that I once had, I think it would be Berke and his much-missed cast of characters.

His sense of timing was impeccable, no? Not just the punchline, but the delivery AFTER the giggle is what usually makes me laugh until I cry.

Case in point, since this one is just classic, and I don't think it's been mentioned:

Opus: How I love to watch the morn,
with golden sun that shines,
up above to nicely warm
these frosty toes of mine.

The wind doth taste of bittersweet,
like jasper wine and sugar.
I bet it's blown through others' feet,
like those of............



<wait for it>

Caspar Weinberger.

Milo, popping up: START OVER!

Gods, how can you improve on perfection?

I can't BELIEVE none of you have mentioned Rosebud the basselope yet, either. PINKOS! HEATHENS!

("Fetch me a pickle milshake" is *still* one of my favourite lines)

[matt_mcl]

-Excuse me, you are a wild animal, aren't you?
-Yes.
-Pardon me, but have you ever been fried, filleted, splayed, displayed, maimed, spavined, roasted or toasted?
-No.
-Humiliated, objurgated, flattened, minced, injected, rejected, infected, tortured, powdered, hunted, or shot?
-No.
-You just lie around all day doing nothing?
-Yes.
-HERE'S ONE!!!
(whoosh) (BANG!) (snap) (ka-pow) (zZzing) (wham)

[Lute Skywatcher]

I can't BELIEVE none of you have mentioned Rosebud the basselope yet, either. PINKOS! HEATHENS!

You really should stop the speed reading:

Originally posted by myself
Rosebud: "The Hottentots are running amok!"
Opus: "No, it's just us. Band practice broke up early."
Rosebud: "The Hottentots are running amok in the music business."

[Ike Witt]

I think that it was Portney who said, "What exactly is feminine protection? A chartreuse flame-thrower?"

Lady at Deathtounge show: Do you know any Barry Manilow?
Opus: We have "Hari-Kari for Barry".
Lady: Oh? Thats one of his?

[Kilvert's Pagan]

Originally posted by Show_Biz
Berke Breathed's attraction has always escaped me.
I know that he got a boost from "replacing" the far surperior Calvin & Hobbes strip, but after that I cannot fathom his continued popularity.
Originally spoken by Gregory Peck
What is Bloom County? What is the matter with me that I don't understand it?
Timing, and absurdity. For instance, out of the blue, suggesting the casting of Eric Estrada for some production (aside from Opus, a slave to the tabloids: "He needs the work").

Bloom County appeared during a Doonesbury hiatus, which created a lot of comparisons. C&H came out a few years later. I can't rank Bloom County over or under C&H - they're both brilliant.

[Nymysys]

Originally posted by Jeff Olsen
[QUOTE]You really should stop the speed reading:

Apologies to Jeff, who obviously knows his stuff. I'll remember to not post before my eyes are fully open from now on.

And kudos to matt_mcl as well. Anyone that can pull up a Rosebud strip is A-OK in my book :)

[Lucki Chaarms]

OK, another great one:

Yaz: Name one name, just one name that's wierder than "Yaz Pistachio"

Opus: "Berkely Breathed"

Yaz: OK, name two

[Snickers]

Thanks guys--I needed this today.

I still say "a thousand apologies" to people--I think only my brothers get it.

"A Wish for Wings that Worked" was incredible--"eww, eww! A hairball! Don't touch that thing!" Genius.

The one I think about from time to time was when the unfortunate Opus was struck by the falling satellite, and no one would help him because they were unsure whether "he still got Cheez-Whiz in his knickers?"

Hah, she says in a haughty tone, I still have my Billy and the Boingers 45 and it is pure and pristine. I've never even listened to it (largely because I couldn't find our record player!).

Can you grimace musically?

I'd like my milkshake without the cup--you said I could get it my way.

[Snickers]

"An albatross! She left me for an albatross! With great big loooong wings! Oh my Delores..."

"P O R K--you know, the other white meat?"





My husband must be tired of all the Opus and Bill cards he gets...don't know if he fully understands them or not.

Sigh...I need my books.

[Kyomara]

Milo at the Lost & Found department of a department store (paraphrased)(severely)

Milo: Excuse me, I've lost my youthful idealism.
Man: Your what?
Milo: My youthful idealism. I used to have it but lately I just can't seem to find it.
Man: Er...
Milo: And my sense of humor. Lately I've lost sight of that as well...
Man: um...
Milo: Now I'm losing my patience! I don't suppose you've seen that lying around anywhere have you?!?
Man: I...er...
Milo: Oh, Great!! Now I've lost my TEMPER! So unless you've got THAT back in there, I shall bid you good day!!
Man: Puh...please!! Hasn't anyone lost anything TANGIBLE?!?
Opus: Excuse me...I've lost my marbles.

[Dijon Warlock]

Originally posted by beagledave
I went to college in Iowa City, Berke's early hometown..needless to say Iowa Citians are required by penal code to think he is cool..many of the references in his early cartoons are from Iowa City stores or landmarks.

In the Iowa City library is a signed color print of Opus reflecting on how much he will miss Iowa City (done when Berke moved west)...he names all the things he loves...But then says "except for the water..it tastes like Spic n Span" ......which is spot on <shudder>

I have a regular Opus doll and a reindeer Opus...and there is a "Thpppt" cartoon of Opus in my web site. I can go you one better: for about seven years, I lived in the actual Bloom County House that appears in the strip (on the corner of College and Summit streets; and yes, it still rents rooms). Between 1987 and 1994, you could see my Christmas Opus peeking from the curtains in the second story window over the stone arch. The fountain in that "Spic-n-Span" cartoon (affectionately known as 'Three Ladies Pissing'--the fountain, not the cartoon) has been removed and replaced with something a bit less treacherous for the kiddies to play in. Another bit of history gone.

[lolagranola]

It took me a while, but I finally made it to this thread. I've got too many favourites, but here are a few.

Teacher - Fractions, ladies and gentlemints. Today's math lesson is on fractions. Allow me to illustrate. This, dear children, is a grape. A grape that represents, shall we say.... the total annual salary of a public schoolteacher. Now. First we'll subtract a dozen mortgage payments. That'd be about 1/4... And food... that's about 1/4... and 1/7 for clothes... 1/12 for gasoline... 1/10 for typewriter ribbons... and a whopping 3/10 for alimony payments to an ungrateful ex-wife!! Mr. Jones, please tell us what fraction remains to put toward an early and well-deserved retirement.
Oliver - Diddley/squat
Teacher holding watermelon - Now here's the salary of a city garbage collector...

Then there was the ill fated quest for a better bod...

Local resident found unconscious with chest hair mysteriously ripped out

Steve's attempt to quit smoking...

Opus God is my co-pilot.

Steve, after the aliens flopped his personality...

Milo What are those things on his face?
Opus What things?
Milo Those brown, thoughtful globs!
Opus His eyes!

Another fave from that time...

Steve Ever since I returned, I've been thinking of us, Quiche. I'd like you to consider a brave new level of commitment and emotional purity... I'm going to say just one word.... and I want you to say the one word that first comes to your mind. Ready? Celibacy.
Quiche Don't forget your hat on the way out.
Steve That's eight words!

Opus in jail, after attacking the mime...

Opus Wh...What do you think I've got coming?
Steve A million. Maybe two.
Opus freaks out
Opus... YEARS?!
Steve Dollars! TV rights! What the hell are you slobbering about?

[Askia]

------

Your Mom turned you into her own little Michael Jackson, eh? Hee hee!

-------

Now son... I know you... and I don't want you experimenting with subliminal messages.

Like what?

Like "I feel like raising Oliver's allowance..." or "I feel like taking Oliver out for ice cream."

Or "I feel like shoving cucumbers up my nose and putting spam on my head?"

Let's stay serious, son.

------

This is worse than when I put the sprinklers too close to car, isn't it?

The "Cripps" blew it up 20 minutes ago, son...

------

[Monstre]

Rosebud: There seems to be a diminutive bug in my boudoir.

A few panels later...

Cockleberry Cockroach: Say! Mind if I run in an' out of your nose while you snooze? Don't mind if I do!

-----

Steve (placing personal ad): Fabulously handsome single male, 28, seeks tomato, 18-22, for manhandling and light housecleaning!

-----

Clerk: There's no such thing as walrus wafers!
Opus: Well, there should be.

-----

'Mr. Spock doesn't say, "Let's blast their buns off."'
'Yeah!'
'Simp!'
Opus: Well, excuse me for living.

-----

Ack! Thpttt!!!

[Kyomara]

Well, I mean, a space walrus...with photon flippers or something...

[bughunter]

Oh yes, how appropriate.

I feel like Opus this morning.

You see, Saturday morning, while watching the wee morning hours of the broadcast TV schedule, I ordered $1100 worth of merchandise while under the influence of an infomercial.

Yes. Yes. And yes. I was drunk. The price was not really within my means. And I used a credit card.

But to my credit, the merchandise was a Bose Acoustic Wave Stereo System. (http://www.bose.com/home_audio/wave_systems/awms/)

At least I didn't order 273 of them!

[GingerOfTheNorth]

Milo Bloom & his Grandpa sitting on a park bench; also on the bench is a pregnant woman.

Milo looks at the woman.
Milo: Do you love that baby in your tummy?
Pregnant lady: Why yes, I do, very much.
Milo: Then why did you eat it?

I had that taped to my fridge when I was pregnant with my son. I miss the strip a bunch.

"The Captain has a tomato!"

I still say "Pear Pimples for Hairy Fishnuts" from time to time.

Ginger

[Tuckerfan]

Okay, here's a couple:

They're exchanging Bill for Cutter John and the gang and Steve's seeing Bill getting on to the plane. Both the Russian (er, Soviet) guy are thinking nasty thoughts about one another. Can't really remember what Steve's were, but one of the Soviet's thoughts was absolutely priceless: "Sheep pimp."

Then there was the strip where Cutter John was on a date and after an awkward bit of silence he asks, "Legs shaved?" To which her reply is, "Halfway."

Finally, I, for one, always refer to the handicapped parking spots as "The Forbidden Handicapped Zone."

Ah, memories.

[Felinecare]

Opus: Mrs. Langdon, I couldn't help noticing one of your love letters to Mr. Langdon under the coffee grounds. May I read it? *Dearest Walter Woogums: When we kiss, my toes ache. I live for it. Achingly, Ellie Sue*

Mrs. Langdon: My name's Fran.

Opus: Of course it is.

And:

Steve Dallas is lecturing the Boingers in the back of the RV.

Steve: No boozin', no spittin', no mooning the audience, no...uh....hold it. WHO'S DRIVING?

Opus: Keep your pants on. I pushed cruise control.

[Weird_AL_Einstein]

I still say The Far Side was the greatest ever, but Bloom County was right up there with it, a beautiful bright star in the firmament that was the golden age of the comics, the 1980's.

Sigh.

I remember my favorite character was Oliver. "Bloody difficult being an agnostic these days." Him and his Banana(tm).

I remember the DeathTounge/Billy and the Boingers tour coming to a premature end when Bill the Cat got "caught with his pants up" with a nun.

I remember the machine the aliens used on Steve Dallas' brain was called a "Gephardization Machine".

I particularly remember one strip...it had no dialouge, just Opus coming upon a billboard garishly proclaiming the dangers of snorting dandelions. After looking at the billboard for several frames, he turns and looks at a dandelion growing next to it. Then he snorts it.

Someone else pointed out that the animal rights storyline was one of the signs that the strip was declining. While I never like being preached to, and I didn't really agree with what he was preaching, even in those strips Breathed was still able to make me laugh.

Sigh. Breathed. Larson. Watterston. Why did they have to leave us?