Frankku

[living_in_hell]

My ode to dear Frank
He's my new forum stalker
16k tough guy

"Have fun while it lasts"
He seems to want me to go
Life of the party

Middle school fun fun
He's like a hall monitor
"I said, 'NO HORSEPLAY!'"

[flatlined]

Maybe I need to drink more. Your post might make more sense if I was drunk.

[Frank]

Maybe I need to drink more. Your post might make more sense if I was drunk.
Here (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=14898816&postcount=22), if it helps.

[flatlined]

snerts. Thanks Frank.

Your first pitting...are you going cry yourself to sleep. Not because you got pitted, but because its so lame.

I'll try to make it better.

Frank is one of those people who uses commas in the right places. Frank makes my typing look lame. Yeah, lets pit him!!!

[Sleeps With Butterflies]

Here (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=14898816&postcount=22), if it helps.

Didn't really help that much. You must have made a serious impression on this newbie.

[Frank]

Your first pitting...
Before your time, I was a mod when criticism of mods was only allowed in the Pit. I was certainly and more than once Pitted then.

This might--I'm uncertain, but . . . might--be my first Pitting that didn't have to do with being a mod.

[Rhythmdvl]

.



Here at the Straight Dope
the fucking hall monitor
was named Manhattan



.

[digs]

I had someone start yelling at me on the street the other day. My first reaction was to feel bad, but by the second run-on sentence, I realized he must've been dropped on his head as a child.

I hope you take this just as seriously, Frank.

[Happy Lendervedder]

This has to rank up there with the all-time stupidest fucking Pittings of all time.

Frank, step it up a notch. You're not attracting the the smartest trolls these days.

[The Hamster King]

"Have fun while it lasts"
He seems to want me to go
Life of the party
No. He just knows how it usually plays out.

I think in your case it will take about ten days.

[Blank Slate]

Having eight bay windows on the ground floor woulld be like living in some kind of hell.

[cochrane]

I think it's pretty creative, since, AFAICR, no one's been Pitted in haiku before.

[Der Trihs]

My ode to dear Frank
He's my new forum stalker
16k tough guy

"Have fun while it lasts"
He seems to want me to go
Life of the party

Middle school fun fun
He's like a hall monitor
"I said, 'NO HORSEPLAY!'"Burma Shave!

[Oakminster]

Um....OP, Frank is not the only one that finds you to be an annoying little twat.

[Cicero]

Well, normally I'd ask politely for Frank to go easy on you as you are way out of your depth. However, in this case.......

Secondly, as far as I know, Cat Whisperer is female.

[bucketybuck]

So what happened
with your next door neighbour?
Was he a murderer?

[Autolycus]

So what happened
with your next door neighbour?
Was he a murderer?

A line of five then sex
Then six again a haiku
is not. Poem police.

[jjimm]

A line of five then sexFive lines then some sex
Sounds like a brilliant night out
To be quite honest.

[Smeghead]

A line of five then sex
Then six again a haiku
is not. Poem police.

It is, however, a hell of a night out.

[Fear Itself]

Having eight bay windows on the ground floor woulld be like living in some kind of hell.Maybe he doesn't realize he is a fish living in an aquarium.

[bucketybuck]

A line of five then sex
Then six again a haiku
is not. Poem police.

Many are the fucks
I do not give
about acuracy on the internet

[Autolycus]

Many are the fucks
I do not give
about acuracy on the internet

How easy life is
Striding through oblivious
Fools have no worries

[Batfish]

This has to rank up there with the all-time stupidest fucking Pittings of all time.

Frank, step it up a notch. You're not attracting the the smartest trolls these days.

I agree. Frank, you should be embarrassed by this. Not because you've been pitted, of course, but that the original controversy is so weak. Next time you straighten out a newb put some hot sauce on it!

However, bonus point for providing the link yourself. :)

[gamerunknown]

I thought I'd chip in...
I am uncreative.
Oh well, nevermind.

[living_in_hell]

This is the best pile-on ever. I wasn't aware that being called a "twat" was within the guidelines--nor am I clear on what constitutes a "troll" in these parts? Or "harassment" through following others around in threads? Maybe we could all review the rules. It's Sunday. Jesus would like that.

[Attack from the 3rd dimension]

This is the best pile-on ever. I wasn't aware that being called a "twat" was within the guidelines--nor am I clear on what constitutes a "troll" in these parts? Or "harassment" through following others around in threads? Maybe we could all review the rules. It's Sunday. Jesus would like that.

The barbeque pit
Has it's own set of guidelines
Ignorant monkey

[ElvisL1ves]

Um....OP, Frank is not the only one that finds you to be an annoying little twat.Um, Frank, the OP is not the only one that finds you to be an annoying little twat.

[wedgehed]

Here (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=14898816&postcount=22), if it helps.

You bastard!

:)

[Astroboy14]

Y'all are aware that none of these "poems" even rhymes, right? Right?

[Little Nemo]

It's times like this when I'm glad I grew up in the seventies. I had my retroactively embarrassing "everybody look at me" moments when I was a teenager but at least I know there's no permanent copy of the things I said and did floating around. The worst thing we ever had to go through was looking at our old yearbook pictures.

[living_in_hell]

This is a "look at me" moment? What makes you so sure you know how old I am?

[Cicero]

I doubt that you have reached 30.

[Frank]

Y'all are aware that none of these "poems" even rhymes, right? Right?
free verse doesn't
have to
rhyme, you know. It
only needs to have a
good backbeat that's narrow and hard to master

[living_in_hell]

I doubt that you have reached 30.
Clarification : not being snarky to LN or you, but...is there some rule that we have to act our age on the Internet? Could it be possible that I'm actually quite mature in real life but came here to have fun?

[Fear Itself]

You can act what ever age you want here, so long as you obey the rules. But that doesn't mean we won't mock you mercilessly. Big kids don't whine so much.

[Autolycus]

Clarification : not being snarky to LN or you, but...is there some rule that we have to act our age on the Internet? Could it be possible that I'm actually quite mature in real life but came here to have fun?

Sure. Anything's possible.

[living_in_hell]

I'm not whining. I'm just taking it all in. Living the Internet dream--one post at a time.

[Chefguy]

Going to the Pit
Masturbation is fun
Just don't get caught out.

[drewtwo99]

The barbeque pit
Has it's own set of guidelines
Ignorant monkey

This haiku must be
one of the best that I've read.
I love it, Attack.

[Chefguy]

Going to the Pit
Masturbation is fun
Just don't get caught out.

That should be: "masturbation can be fun".

[Attack from the 3rd dimension]

I'm not whining. I'm just taking it all in. Living the Internet dream--one post at a time.

Oh, I should have mentioned above - welcome to the dope living_in_hell.

I think a pitting in haiku is one of the best things ever. You have a lot to contribute. I hope you stay.

[kaylasdad99]

I, too, hope he stays
I just wish he'd lurk a while
Before his next post.

[Little Nemo]

This is a "look at me" moment? What makes you so sure you know how old I am?Your posts are my cite.

Seriously, I thought about not posting what I wrote. "Go easy on him," I thought, "He's just a kid. He'll grow out of it."

But in the long run, I figure I wouldn't be doing you any favors by not pointing out you're living out a cliche. If you were to read your posts ten years from now, you'll cringe. Do yourself a favor and dial it down a notch.

And if, despite all appearances, you're not a teenager - then my advice is claim to be a teenager. It's one thing to act like a typical teenager when you are a teenager. If you're still acting like a typical teenager when you're thirty, you have a problem.

[digs]

Clarification : not being snarky to LN or you, but...is there some rule that we have to act our age on the Internet? Could it be possible that I'm actually quite mature in real life but came here to have fun?

But... see that line under the logo? "Fighting Ignorance" means we're bringing more than just being immature to the discussions here.

I'd suggest moving over to "Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share (MPSIMS)" (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/forumdisplay.php?f=4) for, well, pointlessness.

[living_in_hell]

adde parvum parvo magnus acervus erit

[silenus]

adde parvum parvo magnus acervus erit

Tauri excrementa?

[Foggy]

My ode to dear Frank
He's my new forum stalker
16k tough guy

"Have fun while it lasts"
He seems to want me to go
Life of the party

Middle school fun fun
He's like a hall monitor
"I said, 'NO HORSEPLAY!'"
You see everyone wants to be Frank.
"Can I be Frank?"
"Let's be Frank."
I hear this all the time. He must be a wonderful person and handsome to no doubt. Also he once told a story about lamps & sunglasses, it was really quite funny.

[Giraffe]

OP is a pretty obvious sock/troll, IMO. The wide-eyed "I can't believe the cruelty!" simply can't be real.
I'm blown away by this forum--I spent years posting on a forum with no moderators and its got nothing on this place.
Anyone who has spent more than ten minutes on the Internet has seen far worse than any post made in the Pit in the past five years. I call bullshit.

Besides, he latched onto Frank way too quickly. It usually takes at least a couple of months to realize what a toolbag Frank is. :p

[Cat Whisperer]

Hey, I didn't give him permission for this OP!

[Attack from the 3rd dimension]

adde parvum parvo magnus acervus erit

Until we came to a side road, and off the side of the side road there was another fifteen foot cliff and at the bottom of the cliff there was another pile of garbage. And we decided that one big pile is better than two little piles, and rather than bring that one up we decided to throw ours down.

Arlo Guthrie, Alice's Restaurant

[living_in_hell]

No--I just believe that post by post I will find the way. Gestalt and stuff.

[living_in_hell]

OP is a pretty obvious sock/troll, IMO. The wide-eyed "I can't believe the cruelty!" simply can't be real.

Anyone who has spent more than ten minutes on the Internet has seen far worse than any post made in the Pit in the past five years. I call bullshit.

Besides, he latched onto Frank way too quickly. It usually takes at least a couple of months to realize what a toolbag Frank is. :p
Well considering it's been established I'm a teenaged boy then I guess you're like Father and you know best.

[living_in_hell]

Hey, I didn't give him permission for this OP!
Dude. I've got me two locked threads. I'm big time.

[guizot]

And if, despite all appearances, you're not a teenager . . .Could there be any doubt with someone who posts in Latin? (And puffs up like a turkey?)

[Cat Whisperer]

Until we came to a side road, and off the side of the side road there was another fifteen foot cliff and at the bottom of the cliff there was another pile of garbage. And we decided that one big pile is better than two little piles, and rather than bring that one up we decided to throw ours down.<snip>Was that a quarry? Were people throwing shit down there?

Dude. I've got me two locked threads. I'm big time.Holla! (http://207.199.174.56/img/HjNipYFONT_holla-holla.jpg)

[living_in_hell]

Could there be any doubt with someone who posts in Latin? (And puffs up like a turkey?)
Zip it, guizot--I have a final I'm studying for. And like anywho everyone knows that the male frigate puffs up like no turkey ever could.

[living_in_hell]

Was that a quarry? Were people throwing shit down there?

Holla! (http://207.199.174.56/img/HjNipYFONT_holla-holla.jpg)
That pic just made my day--for real.

[DMC]

No--I just believe that post by post I will find the way. Gestalt and stuff.If you're referring to reading post by post, then sure, that's good advice. The more you lurk, the more you become familiar with how things operate 'round here. If you simply think that the more drivel you post, the better you'll find your way, not so much.

[living_in_hell]

Hey, btw "sock/troll" would make a great name for a boy band.

[living_in_hell]

If you're referring to reading post by post, then sure, that's good advice. The more you lurk, the more you become familiar with how things operate 'round here. If you simply think that the more drivel you post, the better you'll find your way, not so much.
I see your point, but given the basic realities of interpersonal functioning, how do I learn about people without direct interaction? Correlation does not equal causation; observing others interact is informative but really not indicative of how they will interact with me.

[Ludovic]

A cool dry place
Random Treasure
Last of the Dogmen
Quisiera's Black Stone
I was just cleaning out my storaged boxes and I found an old book of homework and fantasy (fiction and / or d+d) stuff and I found this found poetry in the form of a list.

[Giraffe]

Well considering it's been established I'm a teenaged boy then I guess you're like Father and you know best.
The funny thing is that sock and/or troll is far and away the most flattering case for you. It's like if someone asks if you're super drunk: huffily responding that you're stone cold sober? Bad times. At least if you were drunk you could sober up.

[Little Nemo]

Could there be any doubt with someone who posts in Latin? (And puffs up like a turkey?)When somebody gets mad at somebody and responds by writing poems about them, I figure they're either a teenager or Lord Byron.

[living_in_hell]

The funnier part is that while I have no data to prove otherwise, I'm pretty sure most young men under their 30's would not reference a b&w early 60's sitcom. The funniest part is that I already knew where the sock/troll comment was coming from, but chose, like most of my comments here, to reframe it. But hey thanks for caring and sticking your neck out with your post! See that's a play on your name, giraffe. Get it? Stick your neck out. It's funny. Punny even. I learned about puns at chess club last week. Or was it yearbook club? I can't remember.

[living_in_hell]

When somebody gets mad at somebody and responds by writing poems about them, I figure they're either a teenager or Lord Byron.
What a coincidence--when I see someone named after a fish I assume they work the corner! Care to continue, Ms. Fish?

[Really Not All That Bright]

A line of five then sex
Then six again a haiku
is not. Poem police.
Five lines then some sex
Sounds like a brilliant night out
To be quite honest.
You owe me a new laptop. And a Pepsi.

[drewtwo99]

You owe me a new laptop. And a Pepsi.

You should know better than to drink while reading the dope!!!

[Alessan]

What a coincidence--when I see someone named after a fish I assume they work the corner! Care to continue, Ms. Fish?

And the fact that you got the reference wrong just proves his point.

[living_in_hell]

Really? Fine. I'll play. Honey you put the "ass" in "Alessan." Now take your 14K somewhere else.

But thanks for making me so popular...a celebrity is one who is known to many persons he is glad he doesn't know.

[Alessan]

"Play"? I'm not playing. The only person playing here is you; the rest of us are just watching idly until you're banned. You're a diversion, nothing more. You really don't get that?

[Attack from the 3rd dimension]

When somebody gets mad at somebody and responds by writing poems about them, I figure they're either a teenager or Lord Byron.

Lord Byron. Although I'd expect that he'd be batter at all the fish jokes, especially since he's in a Hellespont of a lot of trouble.

Was that a quarry? Were people throwing shit down there?


You always make me throw shit down the quarry. But you already knew that.

[Chefguy]

Tauri excrementa?

Carpe cerevisi.

[ugly ripe tomato]

Carpe cerevisi.

Carp ceviche?

[Little Nemo]

What a coincidence--when I see someone named after a fish I assume they work the corner! Care to continue, Ms. Fish?You see, this is the kind of thing I'm talking about. Somebody who's young might hear Nemo and think, "Oh, I know that one. It's from Finding Nemo. I saw that movie when I was a kid."

Somebody who's older might know that the name Nemo was around long before Pixar used it. And they might realize that somebody probably wouldn't have chosen a name from a 2003 movie back in 1999.

It's not that somebody who's young doesn't have anything to say. It's just that you have to realize many of us have decades of time on you and we've had experiences you haven't had the time for yet.

[Ambivalid]

Really? Fine. I'll play. Honey you put the "ass" in "Alessan." Now take your 14K somewhere else.

But thanks for making me so popular...a celebrity is one who is known to many persons he is glad he doesn't know.

Ooh! Ooh! Do me next!! :cool:

What douchebag remark do you have about my username??

[drewtwo99]

Ooh! Ooh! Do me next!! :cool:

What douchebag remark do you have about my username??

Make up your mind, ambivalent invalid! Are you ambulatory, or invalid???? What a jerkface you are for teasing us all this time!

(how'd I do?)

[Ambivalid]

Make up your mind, ambivalent invalid! Are you ambulatory, or invalid???? What a jerkface you are for teasing us all this time!

(how'd I do?)

You took the fun out it; you actually know something about my username. Still good, but I was waiting for some real stupid shit. :D

[Malleus, Incus, Stapes!]

What a coincidence--when I see someone named after a fish I assume they work the corner! Care to continue, Ms. Fish?

Psst... I think Nemo is a guy.

[living_in_hell]

Little Nemo is a name a guy would pick? Really.

[living_in_hell]

Just curious Nemo: how old are you and what do you do for work? I mean, besides getting off on being an Internet mean girl.

[living_in_hell]

You took the fun out it; you actually know something about my username. Still good, but I was waiting for some real stupid shit. :D
I'm done. It's a school night you know. Gotta get up early!

[BubbaDog]

Crap!

I always show up too late to play with the new trolls.

[42fish]

What a coincidence--when I see someone named after a fish I assume they work the corner!

Meh. It's a living.

[Kamino Neko]

Little Nemo is a name a guy would pick? Really.

Since the original Little Nemo (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Little_Nemo) is a guy, your incredulity is rather strange.

In fact, every major 'Nemo' is a guy, including the fish.

[Little Nemo]

Little Nemo is a name a guy would pick? Really.The fact that Nemo is a male name and every character named Nemo is a man didn't tip you off? I figured you were making a joke.Just curious Nemo: how old are you and what do you do for work?I'm fifty and I'm retired.

Listen, hell, the thing you're missing is that we've seen all this before. It happens five or ten times a year. Somebody comes on the board and starts shotgunning posts all over the place. If they don't get enough attention immediately, they push it (sometimes they use a gimmick like posting in colors or not using punctuation or a catchphrase).

Somebody notices them and says something. Then they act like some huge controversy has erupted and people all over the board are taking sides. This will be an epic war the likes of which the internet has never seen before.

Meanwhile most people don't care. Most people don't even notice. These guys usually end up getting banned or declaring they're quitting the board. And we forget about them a week later. Maybe if you're lucky somebody a couple of months from now will say something like "Hey you remember that guy that post haikus in the pit? What was his name again? Is he still posting here or what?" And the reason they'll be asking is because there's some new guy acting the same way.

Maybe you should consider not being this guy. Stop being a cliche. Just start posting like a normal person. Or don't. Like I said, we'll get plenty more people here to replace you if you go.

[living_in_hell]

Gotcha. Any idea on how to order my disc collection?

[Autolycus]

Listen, hell, the thing you're missing is that we've seen all this before. It happens five or ten times a year. Somebody comes on the board and starts shotgunning posts all over the place. If they don't get enough attention immediately, they push it (sometimes they use a gimmick like posting in colors or not using punctuation or a catchphrase).

Somebody notices them and says something. Then they act like some huge controversy has erupted and people all over the board are taking sides. This will be an epic war the likes of which the internet has never seen before.

Meanwhile most people don't care. Most people don't even notice. These guys usually end up getting banned or declaring they're quitting the board. And we forget about them a week later.

But, if you're lucky, you'll learn from the experience, have some sort of training montage, and make it through unbanned with only one embarrassing board meme associated with your name. There's hope for you yet!

[Lute Skywatcher]

The fact that Nemo is a male name and every character named Nemo is a man didn't tip you off? I figured you were making a joke.I'm fifty and I'm retired.

Listen, hell, the thing you're missing is that we've seen all this before. It happens five or ten times a year. Somebody comes on the board and starts shotgunning posts all over the place. If they don't get enough attention immediately, they push it (sometimes they use a gimmick like posting in colors or not using punctuation or a catchphrase).

Somebody notices them and says something. Then they act like some huge controversy has erupted and people all over the board are taking sides. This will be an epic war the likes of which the internet has never seen before.

Meanwhile most people don't care. Most people don't even notice. These guys usually end up getting banned or declaring they're quitting the board. And we forget about them a week later. Maybe if you're lucky somebody a couple of months from now will say something like "Hey you remember that guy that post haikus in the pit? What was his name again? Is he still posting here or what?" And the reason they'll be asking is because there's some new guy acting the same way. Posting haikus in the pit isn't new, either.

[saje]

There's nothing new on the internet.

[Lute Skywatcher]

Rule 35 porn, by definition. :)

[living_in_hell]

There's nothing new on the Internet.

[Autolycus]

Rule 35 porn, by definition. :)

[saje]

Is there an echo in here?

[Little Nemo]

Posting haikus in the pit isn't new, either.Undoubtedly. But like I said, most of these guys pass through unnoticed by the majority. I must have either missed previous haiku guys or forgot about them.

[living_in_hell]

Is there an echo in here?

[living_in_hell]

LN did I leave an impression upon you? Well I declare...

(I'm really not that bad a person. I promise. Just a little cabin fever this weekend. Laid up for 3 days led me to act up. It's not an excuse but nonetheless I apologize.)

[Ludovic]

And once all the first-order pr0n has been made, you can make a video of the first person to make the last video. Then make a recreation of the first person to make the last video. Etc.

[Katriona]

"Play"? I'm not playing. The only person playing here is you; the rest of us are just watching idly until you're banned. You're a diversion, nothing more. You really don't get that?

They usually go away after spring break, don't they? DON'T THEY? Please...

[Jenaroph]

But, if you're lucky, you'll learn from the experience, have some sort of training montage, and make it through unbanned with only one embarrassing board meme associated with your name. There's hope for you yet!

Don't ladle it on too thick, now.

[Wheelz]

living_in_hell, you always manage to convince yourself that they're laughing with you, right?

[Cat Whisperer]

If I had accidentally bought a custom title again, I'd have it changed to "Loud Pussy" right now. :)

[Happy Lendervedder]

living_in_hell, you always manage to convince yourself that they're laughing with you, right?

No, he knows they're laughing at him. And that fapping sound you hear? It's the sound of a little man masturbating under a bridge.

[living_in_hell]

living_in_hell, you always manage to convince yourself that they're laughing with you, right?
Never. I always imagine they're thinking, "how far will that person get into the day before they realize there is tp stuck to their shoes and kale in their teeth?"

[Count Blucher]

Never. I always imagine they're thinking, "how far will that person get into the day before they realize there is tp stuck to their shoes and kale in their teeth?"

Your mirror speaks true:
kale, blemishes, grains of joke.
Not your hair products.

Douchey jaw, dimpled
Lurk smirk's perk to your work, jerk
Distance makes fonder....

[Try2B Comprehensive]

No--I just believe that post by post I will find the way. Gestalt and stuff.

I think you are referring to the Sierpinski Triangle (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:SierpinskiTriangle.PNG) here, a sidenote to Pascal's Triangle. The nub is that the data points on the image are filled in one-by-one, until at some point there is enough data that your brain 'gets it' and fills in the picture for you.



And only now have I read the rules to the pit, damn you Haiku! All this time I could have been calling you all 'twats' but not 'cunts'. I sure fucked myself there :smack: