Curtis 03/29 - masturbating students?

[ioioio]

http://www.chron.com/entertainment/comics-games/comic/Curtis/

In today’s Curtis comic strip, Curtis’ dad is grumbling about schoolkids expecting to be entertained in class. He grouches that Curtis would probably be entertained if his teacher wore a bikini and wriggled about in a hula hoop.

Curtis replies, “Probably . . . but by the end of the day all the students would be blind by their own hands or driven insane”.

Is there any way this is not a masturbation reference and that the cartoonist didn’t realize this?

Curtis must attend an all-boys school.

[Folly]

Absolutely, there is a way. It's a gouging your own eyes out reference.

Now, whether the cartoonist realized the other possible interpretation, I'm not sure...

[Biffy the Elephant Shrew]

The masturbation reference would make sense if Curtis's teacher were attractive, but she is portrayed as obese and dowdy. Curtis is clearly saying that the awful sight of his teacher wiggling about in a bikini would have a dire effect on the students, not that it would make them horny. The word choice is a bit unfortunate, though--"blind" "hand" and "insane" all in one sentence.

[ioioio]

I will admit that I rarely read Curtis and have no idea what his teacher looks like. So, comprehending today’s strip depends on being a regular reader. To anyone else, I think it sounds like a masturbation reference.

Curtis’ father must know what the teacher looks like. Why would he make such a sexual remark about her?

There’s a reason I rarely read the strip. It sucks.

[Kamino Neko]

I will admit that I rarely read Curtis and have no idea what his teacher looks like. So, comprehending today’s strip depends on being a regular reader. To anyone else, I think it sounds like a masturbation reference.

No, not really.

I don't know if I've ever read the comic before, if I have it's never been in his classroom, and it read as 'gouged their eyes out' for me. And I'm a person who goes to a dirty interpretation really easily.

[Chronos]

Likewise here. I think that the masturbation interpretation is a real stretch-- Even being primed for it, it still wasn't the obvious conclusion.

[Sam A. Robrin]

In a visual medium, there should have been an illustration of the teacher to convey the gag, placed inside a thought bubble or somesuch.

[pulykamell]

No, not really.

I don't know if I've ever read the comic before, if I have it's never been in his classroom, and it read as 'gouged their eyes out' for me. And I'm a person who goes to a dirty interpretation really easily.

Interesting. I usually am not to sex interpretations in lyrics and literature, but this one immediately brought masturbation to mind. As in, I couldn't figure out what the innocent interpretation was until I thought about it some more.

[Inner Stickler]

I think blind by their own hands is a really contorted way to reference masturbation.

[pulykamell]

I think blind by their own hands is a really contorted way to reference masturbation.

Oh, I don't actually think there was a conscious reference to masturbation. But (granted, I was primed by the thread title), it was the first thing I thought of.

[Inner Stickler]

I get that. I'm saying that I think it's an overeager stretch to make that particular connection as it seems to me, people only ever say "Keep doing that and you'll go blind!" or variations on the same. But if any sentence that contains hands and blind is going to be construed as a masturbation reference, then classes on Oedipus are gonna get weird, and let's be honest, isn't that story fucked up enough, already.

[ioioio]

I think blind by their own hands is a really contorted way to reference masturbation.

Well, it was in a newspaper comic strip, where it’s assumed children will read it.

I agree that regular readers would know that the teacher was unattractive, but to the unknowledgeable reader, Curtis’ dad suggested that Curtis would be entertained by his teacher wearing a bikini and wiggling in a hula hoop, which rather implies that she is attractive. And then Curtis says the students would be blind by their own hands.

The bigger question is perhaps whether an episode of a supposedly humorous comic strip should be able to stand on its own. Sam A. Robrin nailed it when he said there should’ve been a thought bubble showing the teacher.

Really, the strip is funnier with the masturbation interpretation.

[madmonk28]

I thought it was a gouging out eyes reference which I also think is a really strange thing to mention in a comic strip.

[kombatminipig]

Also, "blind by their own hand, or driven insane"?

Seriously?

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!

[Wheelz]

BTW, the link in the OP goes to the current day's strip. Here's the one being discussed (http://www.chron.com/entertainment/comics-games/comic/Curtis/20450/2012-03-29.php).

Readers of the strip know that Curtis's teacher is not attractive, so the line clearly is about kids intentionally blinding themselves to avoid seeing her in a bikini, while those who don't will be driven insane by the mere sight of it.

But, it's a horribly clunky piece of dialogue, and it's close to impossible not to think about masturbation as it's worded. This should have been obvious to the cartoonist.

How about, "But by the end of the day, all the students would have gouged their own eyes out!" Too gory?

[planetcory]

Sam A. Robrin nailed it when he said there should’ve been a thought bubble showing the teacher.Nah. That would've been incredibly hack.

[KidScruffy]

Not having read the strip before, for some reason I assumed the teacher was an unattractive man, the father didn't know that, and it was a "poking their eyes" out reference. Then I got distracted by the "th'", I couldn't figure out how to pronounce th' different from the, and I started going insane and considered poking my own eyes out.

[Bosstone]

How about, "But by the end of the day, all the students would have gouged their own eyes out!" Too gory?That's what I'm thinking. "Blind by their own hand" is a really curiously poetic phrasing, not something I'd expect. It was probably made vague so as not to trip the censors.

FWIW, my first reaction was puzzlement at the phrase, then interpreting it as eye-gouging, then interpreting it as masturbating. If it were intended to be a masturbation ref, it probably would have said something more like "They'll go blind or insane," or something like that, since "You'll go blind" is the usual euphemism for masturbating.

[KneadToKnow]

Too gory?

I could be wrong or misremembering or any combination, but I seem to recall reading once that Scott Adams didn't like to say "kill" in his strips because it seemed too violent, so anytime the concept arises, he uses the word "slay."

Also, I remember reading this from sometime in the 90s, so it's possible he has moved on.

[kaylasdad99]

I just looked back at all the archived strips that site allows to see if Curtis's teacher is depicted, and I learned three things:

1. They only let you get to the beginning of the month.

2. Curtis's teacher is NOT depicted.

3. That strip REALLY sucks. Hard.

[Gary T]

Here's Mrs. Nelson. (http://joshreads.com/images/07/03/i070315curtis.jpg) It's a public school with both boy and girl students.

To die by one's own hand (http://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/die+by+own+hand) is a longstanding reference to suicide; I would expect anyone familiar with it to easily make the connection to "blind by their own hands" meaning self-disoculation.

While the warning of masturbation causing blindness is also longstanding, it has always been in reference to continual behavior over a stretch of time. Note that Curtis says "by the end of the day," not even enough time to need glasses :p, let alone go blind.

So no reference to masturbation, rather to the sheer psychic horror of seeing one's stern, fat, ugly teacher wiggling in a bikini.