Was he in the wrong?

[TinyInfinity]

Hello! Everyone helped me out with my own problem so well that I recommended this place to my friends and one of them (who is woefully computer-illiterate) wanted me to ask for him, as I understand the situation:

So, he went out to dinner with two good friends who happened to be married. He hadn't seen them in years. Anyway, at the restaurant, their food comes and the wife grabs her husband's plate and eats it all before digging into her own. His facial expression was described as being downtrodden and hungry.

Anyway, my friend was so in shock that he quietly continued eating and he wonders now if he was wrong for not sticking up for the husband. They're still in town and he wants to hang out again, but he's afraid of not knowing the typical protocol for this type of thing...

I admit, I don't really know. Can you help?

[Sicks Ate]

The fuck? I can't even imagine why this would happen! Some kind of dom/sub thing tied to food?

What are the sizes, if you will, of this couple out of curiosity?

[tdn]

He was wise to butt out.

[Alice The Goon]

What good would come from "sticking up" for the husband, of his own accord? If the husband objected and turned to the friend and asked his opinion, then fine, he should offer his honest opinion. But if the husband just sat there and didn't say anything, then the friend should just mind his own business and be quiet. If this type of situation makes him uncomfortable, he should resolve to not hang out with them again.

[kayaker]

Did she regurgitate the food to him once she had partially digested it?

[TinyInfinity]

The fuck? I can't even imagine why this would happen! Some kind of dom/sub thing tied to food?

What are the sizes, if you will, of this couple out of curiosity?

Uh, the husband was pretty average, I take it, and the wife is my friend's size, about 400+ lbs.

[Sicks Ate]

Uh, the husband was pretty average, I take it, and the wife is my friend's size, about 400+ lbs.

How long has your friend known Mr. Sprat?

[Leaffan]

This has got to be a joke, or a parody thread folks. This is not real.

[Wheelz]

The husband probably didn't want his food anyway because he spotted boogers in it.

[TinyInfinity]

How long has your friend known Mr. Sprat?

Mr. Sprat...? Um, if you mean the husband, years, but I'm not sure how many.

[TinyInfinity]

This has got to be a joke, or a parody thread folks. This is not real.

It's not a joke. I wasn't there, but he wouldn't lie.

[DCnDC]

I don't have any advice but dude, you've got some fucked up friends. Don't you know any normal people?

[MPB in Salt Lake]

Mr. Sprat...? Um, if you mean the husband, years, but I'm not sure how many.

That's OK, feel free to just make something up....

[Sicks Ate]

Mr. Sprat...? Um, if you mean the husband, years, but I'm not sure how many.

http://www.mamalisa.com/?t=hes&p=1343&l=J

[TinyInfinity]

I don't have any advice but dude, you've got some fucked up friends. Don't you know any normal people?

HA. Sure I do, but they are not problematic, so I can't talk about them here.

[Cat Whisperer]

That's OK, feel free to just make something up....
I'm fairly sure he feels quite free to do so. :)

[TinyInfinity]

I'm fairly sure he feels quite free to do so. :)

I haven't made anything up; I really came to get opinions.

[Omar Little]

Your "friend" (;)) should definitely speak up. That type of abuse should not go unrebuked. In fact, Your "friend" (;)) should say something before they leave town.

[tdn]

This has got to be a joke, or a parody thread folks. This is not real.

I don't know.

I used to spend every 4th Friday or so at a friend's house. It was a gaming group of about 5 people. He'd always cook us something, and it was always amazing. He was very generous, and there'd always be plenty.

One night he made a big bowl of spaghetti and meatballs. Then he proceeded to serve himself -- he took almost all of it, leaving very little for the rest of us. When his wife called him out on it, he said "What? I'm hungry!" The rest of us had looks on our faces that said "Please sir. May I have some more?"

He was not normally so socially clueless.

[StusBlues]

I wouldn't say he was wrong for not sticking up for the husband, but he might want to pull the guy aside at some point and politely inquire as to what was up. It might be a very simple thing.

[neuroman]

Tiny, you have got some great stories. We should hang out some time.

[Leaffan]

I don't know.

I used to spend every 4th Friday or so at a friend's house. It was a gaming group of about 5 people. He'd always cook us something, and it was always amazing. He was very generous, and there'd always be plenty.

One night he made a big bowl of spaghetti and meatballs. Then he proceeded to serve himself -- he took almost all of it, leaving very little for the rest of us. When his wife called him out on it, he said "What? I'm hungry!" The rest of us had looks on our faces that said "Please sir. May I have some more?"

He was not normally so socially clueless.

Seriously though, what kind of a moron takes another person's plate in a restaurant, eats it all, and then eats her own meal?

Seriously though, what kind of a moron lets another person take his plate in a restaurant and eat it all, before eating her own meal?

Does not compute.

[Omar Little]

Seriously though, what kind of a moron takes another person's plate in a restaurant, eats it all, and then eats her own meal?

the wife <snip> about 400+ lbs.


Seriously though, what kind of a moron lets another person take his plate in a restaurant and eat it all, before eating her own meal?

Uh, the husband

...

[Anaamika]

Did they put boogers in it first? Sorry, sorry.

Don't stick for the husband. Never ever get in the middle of a married couple*. It's their problem. Maybe it turns him on, who knows?

*Ok, unless you see actual abuse happening. I'll give you that.

[overlyverbose]

Hmmm...

I've had something like this happen before where a former friend of mine who happened to be visiting actually poked (fairly violently, but not quite enough to be a stab) her husband's hand with a fork when he tried to sample some of her food. Her husband looked astonished and humiliated, but it was clearly something that happened fairly frequently. I just made a joke like, "Yikes. Now I know to stick to my own plate!" or something equally nonsensical.

However, if your friend were to do that with said friend's wife, she'll probably assume he was denigrating her because she's fat. Truly, I don't see a win here. I'd just let it go unless he brings it up.

That's a really shitty thing to do, though.

[Rachellelogram]

If this really happened, my guess is that it's a Dom/sub thing, and/or it might be tied to hubby having a feeder fetish. Perhaps your friend misinterpreted the interplay between them. Either way, it's not appropriate to exhibit your private fetishes in the public eye or in front of an old friend.

I can't really see an argument for this NOT being something sexual. If she were just a fat chick with a really huge appetite, she would have simply ordered 2 plates for herself.
...
Sorry to contradict your contradiction (full to the brim of content as it was :rolleyes:), but most people who weigh 400+ pounds do not steal the food off their spouses' plates in restaurants. Or their friends' plates. Or anybody's plate at all. This is highly atypical behavior, regardless of size. Being fat does not automatically make a person bizarrely selfish and inconsiderate. Hence my belief that it's something sexual. Or maybe she had a psychotic break ^_^

[Emtar KronJonDerSohn]

I've seen that happen, not usually with giant fat women but with chunky bulimic women. They make a big deal about how they never eat and they're so skinny and they don't want to order anything but that's weird so they're going to order a small side salad with no dressing. Their salad comes and they eat 2/3 of their date's meal and whatever else they can swipe from anyone else's plate "just one little taste!" at a time. Then they take one or two bites of their salad and proclaim they are full, because they are so small and they never eat and 1/4 of a small side salad with no dressing fills them up!

It drives me nuts.

[Anaamika]

Sorry to contradict your contradiction (full to the brim of content as it was :rolleyes:), but most people who weigh 400+ pounds do not steal the food off their spouses' plates in restaurants. Or their friends' plates. Or anybody's plate at all. This is highly atypical behavior, regardless of size. Being fat does not automatically make a person bizarrely selfish and inconsiderate. Hence my belief that it's something sexual. Or maybe she had a psychotic break ^_^

Quoted for truth. .

[Omar Little]

Quoted for truth. .

I seriously doubt there's much of any truth in this thread.

[Anaamika]

I seriously doubt there's much of any truth in this thread.

Go look at my thread about the woman's boob falling out of her dress at the DMV. I can guarantee you that really did happen. :eek:

[Omar Little]

Go look at my thread about the woman's boob falling out of her dress at the DMV. I can guarantee you that really did happen. :eek:

That seems more realistic than the events described in the OP.

[Bob Ducca]

That seems more realistic than the events described in the OP.

Especially combined w/ the other thread from this OP. Dopers will fall for anything, it seems.

[Freudian Slit]

Go look at my thread about the woman's boob falling out of her dress at the DMV. I can guarantee you that really did happen. :eek:

What does that have to do with this thread, though?

[Sicks Ate]

What does that have to do with this thread, though?

It had a booger on it.

[Barkis is Willin']

Nex time they go out, the friend should grab the wife's plate and dig in. Then he should pass his plate to the downtrodden husband. Everybody wins.

[Anaamika]

What does that have to do with this thread, though?

It had a booger on it.

Touche!

No really, it was just on my mind.

[madrabbitwoman]

Please I beg you -gack- stop with the -bletch- booger -retch- references. I am trying to pretend I never read that thread.

[overlyverbose]

Now I'm ending every thought I have with "and it had a booger on it." It's like the Straight Dope version of adding "in bed" at the end of the fortune in a fortune cookie. Only not.

[Leaffan]

Now I'm ending every thought I have with "and it had a booger on it." It's like the Straight Dope version of adding "in bed" at the end of the fortune in a fortune cookie. Only not.
And shit.

[Taomist]

Nex time they go out, the friend should grab the wife's plate and dig in. Then he should pass his plate to the downtrodden husband. Everybody wins.


Win!

[manila]

He should have prepared for her an appetizer. A knuckle sandwich perhaps?

[Miller]

Taking the story at face value, the first thing that comes to mind is the former roommate of a friend of mine. The roommate was clocking in around the 400lb mark himself. He'd regularly go to Wendy's and order two giant combo meals. But he was embarrassed about how much he was eating, so he'd go in and order a meal at the counter to go, then get in his car, drive around to the take-out window, and order a second meal there. Then he'd go home, eat one meal in the car, and go upstairs with the second bag and act like that was his entire meal.

So, I'm thinking that this woman has worked out a similar deal with her husband, where he orders her second meal for him, so she doesn't have to embarrass herself in front of the waitress by ordering two meals.

[6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast]

You bet your friend was wrong. If he really was a friend of the couple he should have made ol' Spratty order dessert and whipped that plate right out from under him.