E-Z Recipes wanted! Intro to Cooking 101

[Fenris]

I've got a buddy who can't cook. I believe he's made toast on occasion, but he had to call to get help ("What number is good for medium toast").

He lives on TV dinners, Fast Food, my cooking and his parent's cooking.

I want to help him learn to cook (whether he's interested or not is another matter). What I'd like to do is compile a bunch of easy recipes (see below for a definition of easy) for him.

Here's the "rules" for what constitutes easy for the purposes of this thread

No more than 8 ingredients. Water, salt and pepper don't count as ingredients. Anything else does (spices, condiments, etc)

No more than one sauce-pot, one baking pan and/or one frying pan can be used. Feel free to use all the bowls you want. Food processors/blenders/mixers are all verboten.

Ingredients must be available at any standard grocery store in the country. As much as I love fresh, soft-shell crabs, recipes for 'em are pretty useless in Colorado.

15 minute prep time, max



That's about it. Part of the reason for all the rules is that I doubt he's going to go out and buy, say, a blender until he starts to enjoy cooking. The trick is getting him to start.

I'll start with one or two, but all contributions are welcome.

First Recipe
How To Boil Water
Put water in saucepan.
Fill 2/3ds full, max.
Put sauce pan on burner.
Turn burner to highest heat.
Don't watch the pot or it won't boil! ;)
When boiling begins, turn off heat, take saucepan off stove!

Fenris

[frobozz]

1. Open package of ramen noodles.
2. put noodles in a sausepan of water. Heat it until noodles are chewy.
3. Add seasoning packet.
4. Scoop noodles into a bowl. Eat them.

Not really a recipe, I know, but it got me through four years of college and two years of bachelor life.:D

[HeyHomie]

Jeez, your friend sounds like my father, the man who boiled a lettuce leaf :rolleyes:.

Rastahomie's Easy Key Lime Pie

Go to the grocery store and buy a graham cracker pie crust. You should be able to find a good one with the Keebler® Elves on it.
Buy a can of sweetened condensed milk.
Hi, Opal!
Buy some key lime juice. NOTE: It has to be Key lime juice, not just plain lime juice. Something about pH levels; I didn't ask.
Buy some medium or large eggs.

Now for the preparation:
[list]
Open up the can of condensed milk and pour it into a big plastic bowl.
Gently crack open an egg and ever-so-gently let the yolk only fall into the bowl. It's OK if you get a little of the white stuff in there, but not too much.
Repeat the above process until you have four egg yolks in the bowl.
Grab a whisk or a fork and mix together the milk & egg yolks.
Measure 1/2 cup of Key lime juice and pour it into the bowl.
Mix it together gently untily the juice is mixed in.
Pour the contents of the bowl into the crust.
Put the crust in the refrigerator.
Tomorrow morning, put some Cool Whip® on your pie and enjoy!

[Fenris]

Ingredients:
1) 1/2 lb pre-sliced beef, package will be labeled "for stir frying"
2) canola oil
3) teriaki sauce
4) frozen "stir fry" vegetables
5) corn starch
6) cooking sherry (Mirin is good too, you'll find it next to the soy sauce)
7) powdered ginger
8) minute/instant rice

Mix together 1/2 cup of teriaki sauce, 1/2 cup of cooking sherry, and 1 teaspoon of powdered ginger. Put the raw meat in this mixture and let marinate for a half hour. In the fridge!!!

Cook the frozen vegetables per the direction on the package. Dry them with a paper towel, sprinkle with an 1/2 teaspoon of the ginger and set aside.

Mix 1 teaspoon of corn starch with a half cup of water. Get all the lumps out.

Cook the rice as per the directions on the box.

Take the meat from the marinade and let drain. Keep the marinade, you'll be using it in a minute.

Put a tablespoon of oil in the frying pan and let it get hot. Carefully put the meat in the frying pan. Stir constantly! When the meat is mostly cooked (about 3 minutes), toss in the veggies. Keep stirring and cook for another 2 minutes.

Pour the marinade into the pan. When it starts to boil, pour in about a tablespoon of the corn-starch/water mixture. Stir well! As soon as the liquid returns to a boil, the mixture should start to thicken. Take it off the heat and serve over the rice

Fenris

[FairyChatMom]

Some years back my mother-in-law gave my daughter a cookbook for kids. The recipes were simple and the instructions were explicit - mebbe your friend needs to start with this. Crawl before you walk and all that...

I will share a tip my hubby learned when I was out of town and he had to fed himself: You do NOT want to nuke a meatloaf on High for 20 minutes... unless you need a doorstop.

[Ukulele Ike]

Locro (Peruvian Potato Soup)

Put a tablespoon of butter into a pot and put some heat under it. About a half-inch of the little blue flame if you have a gas stove; medium to medium-low setting if electric.

A tablespoon is about a half-inch off the end of the stick.

Take a medium onion (the size of a small woman's fist) and cut both ends off. The root and and the stem end, I mean. Now cut it in half lengthwise. Now peel off the skin...the BROWN stuff. Chop the onion. (Slice both halves across the grain first, as if you were going to put the slices on a cheeseburger. Now turn the onion 90 degrees and cut through it again. You should now have little teeny squares of onion.)

Put the onion in the melted butter and let it sizzle (not too loud) while you get the garlic ready. Oh, you can put a couple of shakes of salt, black pepper, and paprika in with that onion while you go on.

Take two cloves of garlic (not heads, cloves) and cut off the root and stem ends, like you did with the onion. Crush the cloves with the side of your knife; this makes it easier to get the peel off. Now chop up the crushed cloves like you did with the onion. You don't have to worry about getting the pieces REALLY small, this is going to cook for a long time. You'll get better at it with practice, like bowling. Now put the garlic in the pot with the onion.

Peel a pound of potatoes. That would be two good-sized Idahoes, also known as Russets. If the potatoes at the store aren't plainly labeled, ask the produce manager. You don't want Maine potatoes or California Long Whites or Red potatoes. "Good-sized" means the kind you'd expect to find on your side dish if you ordered a $30 sirloin at a good steakhouse. "Peel" means to remove the brown outer skin with the aid of a "potato peeler." They sell those at the grocery store, too, for less than a buck, and they make the job much easier than trying to do it with a knife. Now cut the peeled potatoes into smallish chunks. Put them in the pot with the seasoned onion and garlic.

Add enough water to cover the potatoes. Bring to a boil. (Large bubbles rising from bottom of pot; you may want to turn up the heat to accomplish this in a decent amount of time.) Now reduce the heat so that the liquid comes down to a simmer (small teensy weensy bubbles) Put the lid on the pot and go away and do something else for two hours. Better yet, three hours.

Now go back and check. The potatoes should fall apart when you poke them with a spoon. Mix in a half cup of milk or half-and-half (about a juice glassful) and some grated cheese...cheddar is fine, Monterey Jack is better, queso blanco is best. Not too much, a smallish handful. If you don't have a grater, cut it up into teeny chunks. Stir until the cheese melts. Taste the soup to see if you put in enough salt and pepper.

Serve at once, either alone or with a platter of avocado slices. This should make enough soup to feed both you and your girlfriend, who will be terribly impressed by you and may offer you oral sex afterward.

[that_darn_cat]

E-Z burrittos

Ingredients:

1 pk soft tortilla
1 can refried beans
1 jar salsa, at desired level of hot
1 pk shredded cheddar or "taco" cheese
1 pint sour cream
1 six pack Corona
1 lime

Directions:

[list=1]
Open beans, place in microwave safe bowl, nuke 2-3 mins
PLace torillas on microwave safe plates, nuke 10 secs each
Hi Opal! (My First!)
Spread beans on tortillas
Add desired amounts of cheese, nuke 30 secs-1 min to melt cheese
Add desired amount of salsa, sour cream
Roll into "Burritto Shape"
Crack open an ice cold Corona, add slice of lime
Feast on the Mexican goodness

[wring]

This is painfully easy. Prep time about 5 minutes:

Assemble one casserole dish (about 2 quart size) set oven to 350 degrees.
Ingredients:

1 package of raw deboned deskinned chicken (about 1.5 pounds)

1 -2 stalks of broccoli (or a package of frozen broccoli, which is already cut into chunks)If you use raw, you'll need to chop it into chunks.

several slices of swiss cheese.

1 can of 'cream of whatever' soup (can be cream of mushroom, cream of chicken, cream of brocolli etc.).

salt/pepper to taste.

Dump the chicken in the bottom of the casserole (if you buy it already cut into chunks as for stir fry, that's great, can also use strips of chicken). Dump brocolli into casserole dish. Open can of soup (see, I know the audience) empty contents into casserole. Layer top of casserole with swiss cheese. put into oven.

after about a half hour, put on oven mitts, take casserole dish out of oven, stir contents. put back in oven, let it cook an additional half hour. remove, dine. Feeds 2 - 4.

four ingredients easily obtained, very short prep time, one pan.

[Manda JO]

Mexican cassarole (my husband and I made this one up)

1 lb ground beef
couple onions (I use as many as I can stand to chop, but I am an onion freak)
Two envelopes taco seasoning
1 package shoe-string hashbrowns
Several cups of cheese, whatever type you like and browns well
Can corn

Brown the meat and chopped onions together, drain, add the seasoning and some water, let the water boil off for a while. In a cassarole dish (9x13) mix the browned meat and about half the bag of hash browns. Smooth it over with a spatula (same one you used to brown the meat) and cover with cheese (how much is really a matter between you and your doctor). Stick in the oven at 350 for 20 min or however long it takes for the cheese to melt.

Note: You can hardly screw up this recipe. All measurements are aproximate, and in the end don't make a huge difference.

Variations:

1)You can replace/enhance the taco seasoning with canned enchilada sauce. This gives it a slight tomato taste, a little closer to chile.

2)You can put a layer of cornchips (fritos, tostedos) at the bottom.

[Athena]

Beans and Rice:

Rice
1 can black beans
1 can corn
Salsa
1 T. Cumin
Juice of 1/2 lime
Oil for sauteing
Grated Cheese (monterey jack or cheddar)
Optional: Beer or red wine, jalepenos, hot sauce, onions


Make rice. If you want to make rice easily, buy Uncle Ben's Boil in Bag rice. Won't compete with a nice Basmati, but pretty good when you're just dousing it with hot sauce. To make it, you boil water following Fenris's recipe. Put the bag of rice in the water. Boil for ten minutes.

If you're using onions and/or jalepenos, dice 'em up. Heat the oil in a frying pan. Add onions/jalepenos, saute until they're soft but not getting crispy (about 4 minutes). Open can of beans, drain, rinse in cold water if you're fussy. Add beans to pan. Drain can of corn, add to pan. Add Cumin, salt and pepper to taste. Add a couple big spoonsfuls of salsa, and the lime juice. Mix it all up until it's hot. If you're using beer/wine, throw some of that it and cook until it forms a nice sauce.

Serve over rice, with grated cheese and/or hot sauce on top. Yummmy!

[Dolores Reborn]

Here's two favorites quickie meals in our house:

Hamburger Hash

1 lb hamburger
4-5 med red or white potatoes
1/2 onion, chopped
1 can chicken broth
1 tbs corn starch

Brown the hamburger with the onions, with some salt and pepper. Peel the potatoes while it's browning, then dice. (The smaller the dice, the faster it will cook.) Drain the grease after browning the meat, then add potatoes and chicken broth, plus one (chicken broth) can of water. Stir, cover and simmer on medium for approx. 15 minutes. When done, put cornstarch in (chicken broth) can, add about 1/4 can of water and stir. Pour in pan and stir for about a minute to thicken.

Chicken Noodle Stuff

This takes two pans, but it's worth it.

1 can chicken (about the size of a big tuna can, found in the tuna aisle)
1 12 oz bag extra wide noodles
1 sm box of frozen peas and carrots
1/2 lb of Velveeta
1 can cream of mushroom soup
1 sm can mushrooms
1/2 cup milk

Start salted water boiling for noodles. In a large skillet, dump all the other ingredients. Bring to a boil, then turn down a little and stir. Watch that the cheese doesn't stick and burn. When the peas and carrots are done enough to taste, and the noodles are done, drain the noodles and dump them in the skillet. Stir. Eat.

[ENugent]

Stove-Top has started making some meal "kits" that are really quite good. I can't remember the name - they come in a squat red box, and my grocery store stocks them right next to the spices. They call for chicken breasts, water, and sometimes a pat of butter - everything else is in the package.

Also check out my maple-pepper salmon recipe in Zenster's recipe thread - it has four ingredients, all of which are useful items to have in the home anyway. You need to marinate the salmon a day in advance, but the actual kitchen time is probably under 10 minutes. And it's better than any salmon I've had in a restaurant.

[bernse]

bernse's contributions

E-Z Porkchops and Mushroom Sauce

Ingredients:

4-5 Porkchops
2 cans mushroom soup
1 can water (use one of the mushroom soup cans)
Can of mushrooms (drained)
garlic to taste (pressed)
5 cups cooked rice

Fry porkcops until almost cooked

Add mushroom soup and most of the water. Stir until water mixes with soup. Add mushrooms.

Add garlic (about 4-5 full cloves for myself)

Start making rice (follow instrucions on bag of rice. EZ!)

Simmer porkchops. If the sauce appears to be getting too thick, add a bit more water. Season and/or salt&pepper to taste.

When rice is completed, your done! Tastes really good when dished over the rice.
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Super E-Z Pot Roast LEFTOVER ALERT!!!

Ingredients:

1 Roast (as big as you want, as long as it fits in the pot/roaster)
4-6 Potatoes (peeled and chopped)
1 Onion (peeled and chopped)
5 Carrots (peeled and chopped)
Garlic (to taste - optional)
Salt and pepper
Water

Throw roast in big pot or roaster

Throw in vegtables

Pour in as much water as it takes to go up about an inch or so from the bottom of the pot.

Garlic part (optional) smear as much garlic as you like on the outside of the roast. It puts a nice flavor on the meat when its done

Place in oven. Cook at 350. Depending on the size of the roast, it may be done anywhere from 2 - 4 hours. Just cut into it and see how pink it is.

You can also cook it with the meat mostly or completely frozen, but it takes longer. I recomend it to be thawed first.

LEFTOVERS SIDENOTE
The juices left in the pan can be a really good base for making some soup. If you make some rice and mix it with leftover veggies and cut up meat, put it all back in the pot with alot of water and boil it. And some oxo or beef boulion for more flavor if necessary. You could be eating all week from this recipe.
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I have a really good Teriayki Chicken recipe too, but I can't remember the whole thing. I will try to think of it and post later.

[andyman]

Baked Potato a la Andy

Take 1 baking potato

Punch a few holes in the potato with a fork

Set microwave on 5-8 minutes (depending on microwave)

Place potato in microwave

Cook potato

Potato is done when the fork passes through the potato with no resistance.

Season to taste!

If he can handle this, maybe I'll share my recipe for smothered potatoes with onions and sausage. It's not quite as easy, but quite tasty!

[bernse]

Hmmmm.
Does 15min prep time include actual cooking time? If so, I guess my entries are hooped. If not and it is actual "preperation" and nothing else, they should all be darn close.

[Ukulele Ike]

Begorrah, an' you'll be wantin' some sort of savory with yer potato, me man. I'll go down to th' river and check our nets for a salmon.

[RealityChuck]

Easy Pasta Alfredo:

The amounts aren't precise -- I usually just throw them together until the taste right.

Pasta (spaghetti, fettucini, or shells)
Milk
Butter
Parmesian Cheese
Ground pepper*

Cook the pasta. Drain and put them back into the pan, on the burner (it can be turned off if it's electric; low if gas). Add about 1/4 cup milk, 2 tablespoons butter, and as much parmesian as you like. Stir until thickened (you can add other cheese or more butter). Add pepper and serve.

Sauted beef liver (my favorite -- seriously)

I know -- you hate liver. But you've probably never had it properly cooked. Try this.

1 half pound beef liver
Breadcrumbs (seasoned or unseasoned; take your pick)
Butter

Melt about a tablespoon of butter in a frying pan. Dredge the liver in the breadcrumbs (i.e., dip it so the crumbs coat). When the butter is foamy, put in the liver. Let cook for 3-4 minutes. Flip, put pat of butter underneath, and cook other side for 1-2 minutes. The liver should be slightly red in the center.

I also just tried Shread, Head, Butter, and Bread (http://www.foodtv.com/recipes/re-c1/0,1724,15422,00.html) (as seen on Alton Brown's Good Eats). Delicious.

[Creaky]

This tastes good. Honestly. Keep an open mind. :D

1/2 Can Spam Lite
1 Box Macaroni and Cheese Dinner (Any brand you like)
1 1/2 cups frozen peas
1/2 sweet red pepper

Cut Spam and pepper into small bite-sized chunks.

Set spam and pepper chunks aside.

In a large saucepan, boil peas in 2 cups of water for about 6 minutes.

Drain peas, take out of saucepan and put in bowl, set aside.

Prepare mac and cheese per instructions on the box.

Leave mac and cheese in saucepan on very low heat.

Add Spam, pepper chunks and peas.

Add salt and regular black pepper to taste.

Transfer this mixture to a microwavesafe dish.

Microwave for 2-3 minutes or until hot.

Get ready for a yummy treat. Best served with Guinness Stout. (At least I think so!)

[romansperson]

Tell your friend to buy:

You're Not in Mom's Kitchen Anymore!
: College Cooking for the Dorming Gourmet

by Garry Pastore

It's available at Amazon.com for about 9 bucks. Simple recipes and you don't need much cooking equipment either.

Here's an easy recipe I make:

Chicken 'n Cheese

Ingredients:

One box of any pasta and sauce - can be anything from Kraft Mac n Cheese to the fancier noodles and alfredo sauce.

Milk and butter, if needed to make the pasta and sauce

One bag of pre-prepared chicken strips, any flavor

Any other stuff you care to throw in - chunks of broccoli, carrot slices, peppers, etc.

1) Prepare the pasta and sauce as per the directions on the box. This will generally require you to heat some water to boiling and add the noodles. Once the noodles are cooked, you drain off the water and add the milk, butter, and sauce packet. If you plan to add vegs to the mix and you like them soft, add them at them at the same time you start cooking the noodles. I like mine firm, so I don't add vegs until after the noodles are cooked and we're ready for the sauce packet.

2) Once the noodles and sauce are done, throw as many chicken strips into the mix as you like.

3) Eat.

[wring]

Originally posted by bernse
Hmmmm.
Does 15min prep time include actual cooking time? If so, I guess my entries are hooped. If not and it is actual "preperation" and nothing else, they should all be darn close.
dunno what Fenris was thinking, but for me, if I have to stand over it, stirring and watching, I count it as prep time. If I've thrown stuff together and tossed it into the oven to bake for 3 hours, the baking time doesn't count.

We, however, need an official ruling on this....

[masonite]

Get some boneless-skinless chicken breasts. Salt/pepper them. Put them on a plate and go wash your hands.

Now melt 1/2 a stick of butter in the microwave. Use more or less, depending on how dangerously you like to live.

To the melted butter, add several teaspons of Grey Poupon or other mustard you like. Mix it up as well as you can.

Have a bowl of seasoned Italian breadcrumbs on hand. These are sold in cardboard canisters; Progresso is a good brand.

Dip the chicken breasts in the butter/mustard mixture, and then thoroughly coat them with the breadcrumbs. Place in a casserole.

Again depending on how dangerously you live, pour the remaining butter/mustard mixture over the chicken in the casserole. Or not.

Bake uncovered at 375 for about 20 or 30 minutes. Underdone chicken is not fit to eat, so cut one open, and if it's still pink inside, bake some more. But it's a shame to cook them till they're all dried out.

[Ma Parrot]

The easiest thing is to start with something you like and add to it.

Like canned chili? Add some minute rice and cut-up peppers and mushrooms and onions. Simmer until the peppers look clearish and you have stew.

Like frozen waffles? Fold diagonally and add sour cream and fruit.

Like instant mashed potatoes? Add a can of peas and pearl onions as part of the liquid.

Etc. The key to cooking is not using recipes, but being open to adding ingredients.

[Fenris]

Originally posted by wring
If I've thrown stuff together and tossed it into the oven to bake for 3 hours, the baking time doesn't count.

We, however, need an official ruling on this....

Once again, wring has correctly interpreted my flawed words. ;) I'm defining prep time as "the time that you have to be there" In my stir-fry recipe, the time the stuff spends marinating wouldn't count. In a recipe that involves baking, the baking time doesn't count.

(Frying stuff would be an exception. Usually, if you have to stand there and stir (a la stir-frying) the cook-time is short enough that it's not really a factor. And let's avoid deep-frying (like fried chicken). That may be a little advanced for someone who once wanted to know how to make hard-boiled eggs)

Fenris

[RalfCoder]

Monkeybread - a lightly spiced pull-apart bread that goes great with pasta, chili, soups, etc. So easy that my son was making it when he was 9 years old. It's simple, it's easy, and fairly quick. It was designed to work with a bundt pan, but regular bread pans will work also.

(Note: This recipe will make one large loaf, or 2 small ones. It can be halved if you have only 1 bread pan)

Your ingredients are:

2 loaves frozen bread dough
1 egg
1 tablespoon each of parsley, poppy seeds, and garlic powder. Don't use garlic salt!
1 stick (4 oz) butter. Margarine will work, but not as well.

Thaw the bread dough in the fridge.

When thawed, melt the butter in a small bowl, and stir in the spices. Break the egg into the butter mixture, and stir well. Spray the pan with non-stick spray. Cut the bread dough into chunks about the size of a walnut. Dip the chunks in the butter mixture, and drop them in the pan until it's about half-full. If you have puddles of butter in the pan or start running out of the mixture, add a few chunks of dough w/o dipping them. Put the pan in a warm place to let the dough rise.

When it's almost filled the pan, or you can't stand waiting any more, heat the oven to 350 degrees, and slide this puppy in. Wait about 30 minutes or until golden brown, and remove. Cool on a rack or plate, and serve warm. Serve by pulling off a piece - don't worry about trying to slice it.

[Annie-Xmas]

Good corn dish, courtesy of my sister-in-law, the corn freak

One box cornbread Stovetop Stuffing.
One large can creamed corn

Heat stuffing herbs in 1 cup water (no butter). Simmer five minutes. Heat creamed corn.

Put herbs and corn on dried stuffing stuff and mix. Eat.

People who try this tell me it's also good with different stuffing mixes and creamed stuff, including cream of whatever soup.

[Cheesesteak]

Tuna Casserole

1 can Tuna
1 can Campbells Cream of something soup (condensed)
1/2 bag egg noodles

Boil the egg noodles in a pot of water until they're all soft and noodly, drain.

Mix well with the other two ingredients in a small casserole dish, shove into hot oven (325 or so).

When it's all hot, let's say 20min , remove and enjoy!

You can also add peas, cheese, paprika, and whatnot.

[Bumbazine]

This is the simplest recipe I know, and exceedingly good, if you like steamed cabbage.

Steamed Sausage and Cabbage

Procure a pound of Polish sausage, or Oktoberfest sausage, or Keilbasa or whatever you like. Likewise acquire a medium sized head of cabbage. The round green kind.
Get out the largest pan you have that has a lid, hopefully it's a big one. Slice the sausage into bite sized chunks, and put it in the pan. Turn the heat on medium. If your sausage is kinda dry, put in a little cooking oil and smear it around. While the sausage is heating up, slice the head of cabbage into 4 quarters, top to bottom. Cut out the core[s] at the bottom, they're kind of chewy. Now slice the cabbage wedges into half-inch strips, across the grain, as it were. When the sausage is hot and the pan is well greased, pour a quarter cup of water in, dump all the cabbage in on top, or as much as you can get in there. Be optomistic, it'll cook down. sprinkle on some salt and pepper, lots of pepper. Fresh cracked from a pepper mill is better, but don't let that stop you. Put the lid on, turn the heat down to medium low, IIRC, (it's been a while) and let the cabbage steam for about 20 minutes, or until it's the way you like it. I like mine to still be kind of crisp.

Here's another. You'll need a salad or veggie to go with.
Get a couple of boneless skinless chicken breasts.
Put them in a casserole dish. Salt and pepper both sides.
If you want to branch out, dump on some seasoned salt, lemon pepper, whatever.
Get a jar of good chunky salsa, the kind with black beans and corn in it is best for this IMHO.
Dump a bunch of salsa over the chicken breasts and stick them in the oven at about 350 for about 1/2 hour. (my oven runs a little hot, YMMV). Pull them out and put a slice of cheese on top. Or grated cheese, whatever. Cheddar is better! (We use grated Cheddar and Cojita(sp) a Mexican cheese that smells like old sweat socks, yum!)
Put them back in the oven until the cheese melts. That's it. We like to eat this with rice, and a salad on the side.
(BTW, Zatarain's Spanish Rice is pretty darn good, have your friend try that.)

If I have time this weekend, I'll try to look up some casseroles from my college days. We were poor, but we ate pretty well, considering.

[chique]

You know, I like to cook and I'm good at it. But when I'm in a crummy mood I aim for cheap 'n easy comfort food.

Tell your buddy to buy a box of Bisquick and buy the ingredients for whatever trips his fancy off of the recipes on the box.

Of course, make sure he knows that if the recipe calls for a pie plate that he actually needs a 9x9 pan.

[Jenericho]

There's a pretty simple recipe for simmered brains at http://www.batemania.com/recipes/041700.html
unfortunately, we in Scotland can't eat it because of BSE - shame :) The rest of the site's good too.

Simmered Brains

1. Wash beef, veal, lamb or pork brains in cold water.

2. Soak 1/2 hour in salted water, allowing 1 tablespoon salt per quart water.

3. Remove membrane.

4. Place in pan; add water to cover, 1 teaspoon salt, 1 tablespoon lemon juice or vinegar for each quart water.

5. Cover; simmer over low heat 15-20 minutes.

6. Drain; drop into cold water; drain again.

7. Serve with Mushroom, Tomato, or Butter Sauce.

8. Allow four servings per pound.

From Cutco Cook Book of Meat and Poultry Cookery, Margaret Mitchell, Wear-Ever Aluminum Company, 1956.

[TruePisces]

I'm an abysmal cook. Seriously abysmal. I'm rarely allowed in the kitchen to make anything while I'm home with my parents. The two exceptions are pasta and this recipe.

Corn Souffle

1 pkg Jiffy corn bread mix
2 cans creamed corn
1 egg
1 c. sour cream

Mix them all together and put them in a baking pan. Bake at 350 deg for about 30-35 min. or until hot all the way through.



It's quick, it's easy and it's a great side dish! I made it for my best friend one year when I went to her house for Turkey Day dinner, and now it's a holiday standard.

[lesa]

Here's a really simple recipe to get your friend started.

Ingredients:

Hormel pre-cooked Beef Roast au jus
1 Bag egg noodles
1 or 2 Jars beef gravy

Cook egg noodles according to package directions. While they are cooking, heat roast in microwave according to package directions.

Pour water out of noodles. Put roast in the pan. It's in fairly large chunks. Break these chunks up with a spoon. Add a jar of gravy. If you like it really gravy-ful, add the second jar.

Heat til gravy is warm. Sprinkle with lemon pepper if desired.

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One thing that will really help your friend is teaching him how to brown ground beef. I ate spagetti with plain sauce out of a jar for years. Then I learned to cook ground beef, and I could have spagetti with meat sauce.

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Here's a quick Chili-mac recipe:

1 Bag macaroni noodles
1 Can Manwich
1 Pound cooked hamburger.

Cook the macaroni according to package directions. Drain water. Add Manwich and COOKED hamburger. Heat. Yum! (If you don't like Manwich, use spagetti sauce.)

----------------

I am a truly terrible cook. It took me years to get to the point where I could make these simple dishes. When you are helping your friend learn, make sure you're right there with him. My brother once left the room while I was trying to make Stovetop Stuffing, and I ruined it. I made sagey paste. It was awful.

Good luck.


http://www.hormel.com/Hormel/recipe.nsf/$$ViewTemplateDigitalRecipe?Open

[longhair75]

good evening friends,

for some reason, this dish is known locally as "spanish hamburger"

Spanish hamburger:

2 lbs lean ground beef
1 envelope of Williams chile seasoning
hi Opal! (also my first)
1 medium red onion, coarsely chopped
1 46 oz can of tomato juice
1 12 oz bag of your favorite pasta.



start a sauce pan of water for the pasta to boil.

mix chopped onion, seasoning and ground beef, and brown lightly in the bottom of a large saucepan. ( i use a 5 qt. dutch oven for this) add tomato juice and reduce to a simmer.

when water is boiling, add pasta, and boil till done. drain and add pasta to meat and sauce mixture. serve with fresh french bread.

[TVeblen]

PASTA WITH SPINACH

1 skillet; 1 pan

Water
Pasta of choice
pine nuts
bag of washed, ready to cook fresh spinach
olive oil
garlic (1-2 cloves, finely minced)
parmesan cheese

Put goodly amount of water in pan; as much as it will hold and still leave a few inches headroom at the top for boiling. Bring water to a rolling boil, i.e. big bubbles plopping up. Add @ 1 tsp. of salt to water. When it's dissolved a little, put a small handful of pasta into the water. (For spaghetti/linguini for 1 person, add a "stalk" of noodles about 1" or so across. Or wing it.)

While that boils heat up skillet (no oil yet) and lightly toast pine nuts--just until they're barely gold and smell good. Dump 'em out in a dish and set 'em aside.

Pour a few Tbsp. of olive oil into the skillet; keep this over medium-low heat. When oil is warm, add minced garlic. Stir a bit until garlic takes on just a bit of color and gets soft; DON'T let it get brown. When garlic is barely golden colored, plop spinach into the skillet. Turn the heat down to simmer, i.e. as low as it will go. The spinach will barely fit but just toss with the hot oil/garlic for a few minutes; the heat will wilt it down amazingly. Toss a few more times.

Drain the pasta but don't rinse it! Jiggle the pan a bit to get as much water out as you can, then dump the pasta into the skillet with the spinach. Toss well to mix; sneak a bite and add salt if needed, a bit more oil if it seems to dry, whatever. Dump the pine nuts off of the plate, into the skillet, then scoop a bunch of pasta back onto the plate. Top with parmesan.

Whole thing takes 15 minutes, max.

FAST, EASY PIZZA VARIATIONS

1 flat cooking sheet or pizza pan

Ready made pizza crusts (Boboli, etc.)
shredded cheese
toppings of choice:
only limited by your tastes and possibilities

Preheat oven to 350-375 (or whatever package directions say). Put pizza crust on pan. (It can help to smear a titch of olive oil on the pan to help prevent sticking; makes the bottom of the crust slightly crispier, too.)

Plop on toppings of choice, sauce first if using it; then other stuff. Bake for 35-45 minutes or until it looks done.

Prep time: @ 10 minutes. These ready made crusts are life savers to have around. If you buy the ones that aren't "Italian seasoned" you can really improvise with 'em. Top w/ leftover chicken, barbeque, taco fixin's, marinated artichoke hearts--or just leftover veggies and cheese. Diced leftover chicken, corn and pepperjack cheese is great. Just wing it.

Veb

[Scylla]

Melt butter and marshmallows together. Add rice crispies and stir. Push flat in pan. Wait ten minutes. Cut into squares and eat.

[Sir Dirx]

Depending on your friend's skill, he might want to try these:

http://www.brunching.com/features/feature-tvdinner.html
http://www.brunching.com/features/idiotsandwich.html

I'd contribute a recipe as well, but sadly I'm still between the "toast" and "boil water" levels.

There's also a weekly comic called "Cheap Thrills Cuisine." Not always easy, and sometimes not even appetizing, but interesting nonetheless.

http://www.unitedmedia.com/wash/cheapthrills/


Dirx

[MsWhatsit]

Ingredients:

One (1) box of Mrs. T's pierogis
Soy sauce
Mushrooms, sliced
Onions, chopped
Butter

Directions:

Boil some water in a saucepot. When the water is at a rolling boil, toss some pierogi in. They will be frozen, so the water will temporarily stop boiling. That is OK. Wait three minutes and then remove them from the boiling water.

Melt some butter (let's say two tablespoons) in the saucepan over medium high heat. Throw in the mushrooms and onions. Stir them around with a wooden spoon (or whatever implement you happen to be using) until the onions are transparent. Add the soy sauce (let's say three tablespoons, but use however much you want). Then add the pierogi. Let them cook about two minutes, flip them over, and cook them a couple more minutes on the other side.

Slide the whole mess of pierogi, onions, and mushrooms onto a plate, and enjoy them with some sour cream and maybe a vegetable on the side.

[techchick68]

Hijacking here:

Eh, Fenris, you are in Colorado?

I am starting a new website geared towards Colorado and Colorado Living, including recipes....email me when you get a chance and I will email you back with the link when it's up and running.

< don't worry, it's a not for profit site....hopefully that will change but eh, who knows, it's more a time waster for me >

[wring]

Remembered another one: (cause I'm making this tonight)

Need: one large frying pan, large food quality plastic bag (ie, can use the bag the vegetables came in, but not the grocery sack).

Scallops (either bay or sea depending on preference)
cooking oil (can use vegetable oil, corn oil) or margarine
flour
pepper
limes
Cilantro (fresh is better)

Take plastic bag, put enough flour into the bag to coat the scallops (about 1/4 cup for 10 oz or so of scallops) Add pepper (fresh ground if you have, don't sweat it if ya don't). Add scallops to bag, close bag top, shake to coat scallops with flour, set aside.

Squeeze limes to obtain a couple of teaspoons of juice (more to taste).

Chop cilantro (mostly leaves, please) into fine pieces (you shouldn't be able to see what the leaves looked like, there should be just shreds of green) This is to taste - I really like cilantro, others would prefer to have it be an accent flavor. Start with a pile that would loosely fill your fist for a 10 oz package of scallops.

Put pan on burner, over medium heat, either melt butter/margarine in pan or pour cooking oil into it. (you're looking for an amount to just coat the bottom of the pan with a small pool in the center of the pan). When oil/butter/margarine is hot, add scalllops (you can just dump 'em from the bag, tho' if you've got a whole pile of flour left in the bag, you don't really want to have that dumped in. add cliantro. Refrain from stiring frequently, you want the flour coating to stay on the scallops and get nice and brown. But, you do have to stir a few times, in order to get all the scallops cooked on all sides. Add lime juice after the first stirring (if you need to add more butter/margarine, you can do that too). Cook until the flour coating has a medium brown look, and the scallops are cooked through.

yum.

[Dolores Reborn]

I thought of another one. We call this "goulash".

1 lb hamburger
1/2 onion
1/4 green pepper
garlic (frwsh or powder, to taste)
2 15 oz cans tomato sauce
1 15 oz can tomatoes
1 8oz (or maybe it's 12 oz) pkg of elbow macaroni

Brown the meat with the onion and pepper. When it's almost done, add salt and pepper, and the garlic. When done, drain the meat, then add tomatoes and sauce. Break up the tomatoes with a spoon (or squish them in your hand as you add them to the meat). Add 1-2 cans of water. Bring to a boil, and taste for seasonings. Add more if needed. Add the pasta, and stir stir stir from the bottom. It will stick! Keep an eye on it for about 10 minutes until the macaroni is done. I like to add cheese to my bowl, but my husband likes it plain.

[techchick68]

Lemon Chicken with Herbs

(longer than 15 minutes but sure to please most people.)

1 can Healthy Choice Cream of Roasted Chickn with Herbs condensed soup

1/4 cup skim milk

2 tbsp. (each) parsley and lemon juice

4 boneless, skinless chicken breast havles (available everywhere)

1/2 cup sliced mushrooms

1/4 cup chopped red onion

In small bowl mix soup, milk, lemon and parsley;set aside. Heat large non-stick skillet, sprayed with cooking spray (stuff like Pam) on medium for 1 minute. Add chicken; brown 5 minutes on each side. Remove chicken. Add mushrooms and onions to skilett, cook 2-3 minutes. Stir in soup mixture; return chicken to skillet. Reduce heat to low; cover and simmer 5-10 minutes (till chicken is no longer pink in the center).

Serves 4

[techchick68]

I forgot to add,

Fenris - one of the easiest ways to teach people to cook is to start with any pasta dish. Fettucine Alfredo is really easy and I usually make it by throwing in some cut up broccoli, red and green peppers or whatever else suits your fancy:

I personally like to use two different kind of fettucine noodles and usually from scratch but if he'd prefer you can use only one kind.

Fettucine Alfredo

4 ounces spinach fettucine
4 ounces standard fettucine (both cooked and drained)
(8 ounces total if you mix you can cook them at the same time)

1/4 cup margarine
1 cup whipping cream
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon pepper
1 package of 100% shredded parmesan cheese (3 ounces)

Melt butter in 3 quart saucepan over low heat, stir in cream, salt and pepper, heat thoroughly stirring occasionally. (I usually do that for about eh 5 minutes but make sure it's on low heat, do not allow to burn)

Add fettucine and 1/2 cup of parmesan cheese, stir and continue for about another 3-5 minutes.

Serve with remaining cheese.

In addition to the veggies, if you have left over roasted chicken you can reheat it (try not to in the microwave, it dries out) and throw it in in shreds. It's a meal in one.

[techchick68]

Gotta love Cambell's ®

Campbell's® One Dish Chicken and Rice Bake

Prep time: 5 minutes -- Cook Time: 45 minutes

1 can cream of mushroom soup (of course Campbell's ®)

1 cup of water (can increase for a creamier to 1 1/3 cup)

3/4 cup uncooked, regular white rice

1/4 tsp paprika

1/4 tsp pepper

4 skinless, boneless chicken breast halves

1. In 2 quart baking dish mix soup, water, rice, paprika and pepper, place chicken on rice mixture. Sprinkle with additional paprika and pepper, cover.

2. Bake at 375ºF 45 minutes or until chicken and rice are done.

Serves 4

Considering the prep time of only 5 minutes, I would assume your friend would be able to pull this off.

[voguevixen]

Put the following into a crockpot IN THE MORNING:

Around 2 cups cut up vegetables (examples: Potatoes, Carrots, Onions, Garlic, Green Peppers, dried beans if they've been pre-soaked. Stay away from broccoli and cauliflower -- smells like feet! Tubers work best.)

Approx 4lbs of meat (Examples: A whole chicken-guts removed, a pot roast, porkchops, chicken thighs or mixed pieces, a ham, etc.)

About a cup of liquid (preferably one with a flavor). (Examples: Water with seasonings, salsa, broth, wine or beer, bbq sauce, cola, pasta or spaghetti sauce. Avoid dairy products because they'll curdle -- but you can stir some in at the end of cooking time to make a creamier sauce.)

Tips: If you'd like it Italian flavored, add Oregano and use tomato sauce as your liquid. Garlic and peppers are good veggies to use. If you'd like it Mexican flavored, add Cumin and use salsa as your liquid. Peppers and tomatoes are good veggies. If you'd like it Hungarian flavored, add Paprika and use beer or wine as your liquid. Potatoes and carrots are good veggies. If you'd like it Asian flavored, use ginger and use soy or teriaki sauce for your liquid (I'm guessing...I don't cook it myself.) Etc. You get the idea.

Plug in pot. Set dial to low and go do something for around 8 hours. Eat.

You pretty much cannot cook anything wrong in a crockpot. Absolutely worth a try.

BTW, the Campbells Chicken and Rice bake TC mentioned is a personal fave! I make it even simpler than that recipe, though: 1 can soup, 1 can water/milk, 1 can worth of rice. (See? No measuring cup to wash!)

[Jekeira]

(People who know how to cook look at the ingredient list and shake their heads in disbelief. But this recipe actually works - that's what's so magical. Your friend should have all of this stuff on hand.)


Ingredients:
1 cup chunky peanut butter
1 cup sugar
1 egg

Instructions:
1. Preheat oven to 350.
2. Lightly grease cookie sheet.
3. Put all ingredients in a bowl and cream them together with an electric mixer.
4. Form mixture into 1-inch balls and put them on the cookie sheet, not too close together. (you should have enough dough for about three batches.)
5. Use a fork to squash the balls down, making the universal peanut-butter-cookie signifying crisscross pattern.
6. Bake 10 to 12 minutes, then immediately remove cookies (which will be soft) to a plate to cool.

Eat 'em while they're still warm.

[Sweet Walter]

This works for everything from collards and turmip greens to spinach or mustard greens.

Ingredients:
2 big handfuls of greens per person (don't worry it will be smaller when you are through)
1/4 pound of cheap and spicy breakfast sausage.
a thumbsized chunk of ginger, peeled and chopped fine

In a Big pot over medium heat, cook your sausage into crumbles making sure it is broken up.

Stir in ginger, then add greens.

Slap on a lid, drink 1/2 of a beer or wait about a minute til the greens have wilted and turned shiny.

Stir it all together coating the greens with the sausage.

Women will throw themselves at you for this.

[TVeblen]

UTILITY CASSEROLE

1 skillet; 1 baking dish

1-1/5 lb. hamburger
1 onion, chopped
1 clove garlic, minced (optional)
1 can condensed "cream of" soup
1/2 pkg. frozen tater tots

Preheat oven to 350. Fry hamburger and onion in skillet until meat is no longer pink; drain. Plop hamburger into the bottom of the baking dish. (Clean up is easier if you spray the dish with Pam first, but it's optional.)
Open can of soup of your choice: cream of mushroom, beefy mushroom, cream of celerey--whatever goes well with beef.
Spread undiluted soup over top the meat. Spread frozen tater tots over the top of the casserole. Bake (uncovered is fine) for 35 to 40 minutes or until bubbly.

CHICKEN BREASTS YOUR WAY

1 skillet, 1 plate

chicken breasts
flour
liquid/add-ons of choice

This is more a technique than a recipe. Pound the chicken breast(s) relatively flat. (You can use a large can of tomatoes or something if you don't have a kitchen mallet.) Put the chix into a ziplock bag with a few Tbsp. of seasoned flour.
Heat skillet over medium heat. When hot, add a little oil, just enough that it barely coats the bottom and leaves a little pool in the middle. Shake of chix and add to pan. Let 'em get golden brown on one side (@4 min.) then flip and let brown on the other side. Remove from skillet and put 'em on the plate.

Now add your liquid/add-ons to the crispy golden stuff left in the skillet. Scrape up the crispies and cook, stirring for a few minutes to make the sauce. (The fancy word for this is "deglazing"; you're blending the flavor of the cooked chicken into the sauce.) Pour over chix and serve.


Examples:

Piccata: rub chix w/ garlic before flouring; cook in equal parts butter and oil; deglaze pan with about a half glass of white wine and juice of 1 lemon.

Provencal: add a little dried basil to the flour if ya got it; brown chix in olive oil; deglaze with a slug of white wine, can of drained Italian-style diced tomatoes, add a clove of minced garlic and finely sliced onion. (You can toss in some sliced black olives, too; whatever.)

Mexican: add a titch of chili powder or cumin to the flour; deglaze with a generous dollop of salsa and a slug of white wine or beer; toss in some frozen corn or chopped green onions, green pepper--whatever.

Oriental: add a titch of 5-spice powder to the flour; deglaze w/ chix broth and a shot of soy sauce; add some finely minced ginger, chopped green onion, a can of drained water chestnuts, etc.

It takes a lot longer to describe this than to DO it. Just use what you have on hand; it's a great way to use up bits of this and that.

Veb

[Ukulele Ike]

Oh, shit.

Just buy the poor bastard a copy of Mark Bittman's HOW TO COOK EVERYTHING.

(one more recipe, what the hell...)

STEAK

Buy a steak. Put pepper on it.

Get your skillet really hot over the burner. Put lots of salt in the skillet.

Drop the steak into it. Sear for two minutes. Turn it over and sear for two minutes more.

Turn the heat down to medium-low and cook for another five minutes. Flip it again and cook for an additional five.

Put it on your plate and eat it.

[Duck Duck Goose]

The Three Easiest Things to Cook in the Whole Wide World:

1. Fried Rice.
2. Baked Chicken Breasts with Stuff on Them.
3. Onion Soup/Spaghetti Sauce Magical Pot Roast.

Fried Rice:
Take some leftover cold cooked rice (if you don't have any cold leftover rice, cook some and then rinse it off in a colander with cold water. Minute Rice is fine--cook it according to what's on the box.) Dump it in a frying pan (spray the pan first with Pam). Sprinkle in some soy sauce and some garlic powder and some onion powder. If you have some leftover cold cooked green peas, put them in, too. Put some kind of meat in here, if you want--leftover pot roast is good, also you can use canned chicken.

You don't have to do the "tiny bits of scrambled egg" if you don't want to.

Baked Chicken Breasts with Stuff on Them:
Get some chicken breasts, they don't have to be boneless skinless, regular is fine. They have to be thawed out, not frozen. If you want to be fancy, you can put them in a glass casserole dish of some kind and pour about half a bottle of any kind of El Cheapo Italian salad dressing on them, and let it sit in the fridge for anywhere from 1 hour to overnight. When you're ready to cook, turn the oven on to 400, and then wait 15 minutes for it to heat up.

(You can also nuke them in the microwave for 5 minutes or so, till there's no more pink juice coming out. Cover them with waxed paper so they don't explode all over the inside of the microwave.)

Anyway, if you're cooking them in a regular oven, take them out of the Italian dressing (pour it down the sink, it's got raw chicken salmonella germs in it, you can't put it on your salad or the FDA will yell at you). Put them in some kind of oven-proof casserole or big aluminum 13 x 9 cake pan (if you line it with aluminum foil, it's easier to wash, although you will then have contributed to our nation's landfill crisis--life is full of these nasty little tradeoffs, isn't it?) After the oven has been heating up for 15 minutes, stick the chicken in there and bake it for about half an hour. Do not cover it, with either a lid or aluminum foil. It will bake better if it's uncovered. If you cover it, it will get all watery and icky.

The other Stuff you can put on chicken breasts (instead of the Italian dressing) is, you can pour undiluted Campbell's soup over them and bake them (don't marinate, just open, dump, bake.) Cream of Chicken, Cream of Mushroom, Golden Mushroom, Cream of Celery (although this is an acquired taste). You can also mix and match--equal parts of Cream of Chicken and Cream of Mushroom is good. Also, you can use equal parts of sour cream and whatever kind of soup. The low-fat or "lite" soups will work, but they won't be as luscious, because it's the fat that gives it that good mouthfeel.

Magical Pot Roast:
Get a pot roast (chuck roast, bottom round, English shoulder). It should be a good big hunk of meat. Make sure it's thawed out. Turn the oven on to 350. You can't do this in a microwave, although you can use a crockpot. If you're using a crockpot, put it in before you go to work in the morning, turn it on High, and it will be done when you get home.

Put the pot roast into either a big ovenproof casserole or a big 13 x 9 aluminum cake pan. Do not line the cake pan with aluminum foil, as it isn't necessary and will just make a big mess when it's time to scoop the meat out of the pan. Also put in either one package of instant onion soup mix (El Cheapo is fine), or one package of instant spaghetti sauce mix (again, El Cheapo is fine, and yes, it will look pink when you start but it won't be pink by the time it's done). Add enough water to cover the top of the pot roast. If you're doing this in a crockpot, make sure the water is at least 3/4 up to the top of the crock.

Seal the top of the cake pan with aluminum foil, or put the lid on--you want it pretty tight. Bake it probably at least 2 or 3 hours, and it won't hurt it if it bakes 6 hours, as long as it doesn't dry out. The only way you can overcook pot roast is if it dries out. If you've got it double-sealed with two layers of aluminum foil plus a big heavy glass lid, you've got nothing to worry about.

That's all.

[psychobunny]

Sweet and Sour Meatballs:

Ingredients:
1)One can tomato soup (Campbells of course)
2)One bottle Heinz chili sauce
3)Hi Opal!
4)2 cans whole berry cranberry sauce
5)1-2 pounds ground beef

Directions:
Open all cans and bottles and dump into a big pot on the stove. Mix it together on a low heat until it starts bubbling a little. Take pieces of ground beef and roll into balls with your hands-can be any size from marble to ping-pong ball size and drop them into the pot. Stir a few times. Go away for at least 2 hours-4 is better. Whatever you do, do NOT taste it for first 2 hours, or you make think you did something wrong.
When you come back serve with cooked pasta or rice.

(As an added bonus, my mom swears by this recipe to clean her pots!)

[psychobunny]

MAY think-darn it Bunny, proofread!

[Wonko The Sane]

1. Pat of butter bubblin' in a pan.
2. A corn muffin sliced in half horizontally.

fry it cut side down until you have those yummy brown bits.

Eat it.

Great with breakfast.

[Scoop]

This recipe is good for when you don't have time to go to the grocery store. All the ingredients can be purchased at the gas station, if need be.

Ingredients (for 1 person)
2 eggs
about 3/4 cup of milk
2-5 slices of bread (any kind will do, even stale is fine)
vegetable oil, margarine, or butter
syrup or powdered sugar

Crack the eggs in a medium sized bowl. Beat well with a fork.

Add the milk, and beat again.

Put a frying pan on the stove and turn to medium heat. Add a small pat of butter or margarine, or just enough oil to cover the bottom of the pan. Take a spatula and spread it around so it covers the whole surface.

Put a slice of bread in the milk/egg mixture and poke it down until it's entirely covered.

When frying pan is hot and the bread has been in for about 30 seconds, place the bread in the pan. Let it cook for a few minutes, then turn it over. Let the other side cook a few minutes and put it on a plate. It should be golden brown on both sides. If it isn't, just fry it a little longer.

If the pan is dry, add a little oil/butter/margarine. Place bread in milk/egg mixture and repeat until all the mixture is gone.

Put syrup, jam, fruit, powdered sugar, butter, etc. on top and eat.

[SmackFu]

A basic chili can be pretty simple if you can cook ground beef.

1) Cook 1/2 lb of ground beef in a frying pan until it's brown (not pink or red). (Add some chopped up onions at the beginning if you're ambitious.) Drain out the grease.

2) Throw the meat, a 16 oz can of stewed tomatoes, and a 16 oz can of dark red kidney beans into a pot. Add a tablespooon of chili powder, a teaspoon of garlic power, 1/2 teaspoon of salt. Maybe a tablespoon of sugar if you like it sweet.

3) Cook until it's done.

It's pretty much impossible to screw up. Depending on how high the heat is and how long you cook it, the consistency will be different, but it always tastes the same.

[Dolores Reborn]

Some things you might want to talk to your friend about, which we all kind of take for granted.

1. Don't pour (meat) grease down the sink! It will stop it up.
2. Wash your hands, knives and cutting board (with soap) after handling raw meat, especially chicken.
3. Hi Opal!
4. Pork should always be cooked well done. No pink!

I'm probably forgetting some. Dopers?

[Zsofia]

To add to the list of things that "everybody knows" but not everybody thought to tell ME or anybody else:

Don't wash eggs.

Some fruit ripens at home, some dosen't. Get a list.

Never put bananas in a refrigerator.

Don't put opened cans in either - it's probably okay in this day and age, but my mother would cry.

If you have one bad apple, take it out away from the good apples. It will turn them all into juvenile delinquents.

Be careful about cooking chicken in the microwave, especially an older microwave. It may leave cold spots and salmonella is a wretched experience. Reheating in the microwave is fine. So is cooking, really, but be careful and make sure it's done all the way through everywhere.

Don't under any circumstance eat anything out of a suspiciously bulging can. Salmonella generally just makes people sick - botulism will kill you.

Learn to use a sharpening steel on your knives every time before you use them. Sharp knives are safer and labor-saving. Don't put them in the dishwasher, especially if they have wooden handles.

Just because you moved the pan from the stove does not mean it is no longer hot. (I can't tell you how many smart friends I have who burned their hands like this.)

Don't use metal utensils in nonstick cookware. Even if it says you can. It's lying to you. Besides, you shouldn't need to, since usually you use metal tools for scraping action.

Wash your vegetables. Some people say not to wash your mushrooms, though.

You need less pasta than you think.

[NothingMan]

Seduction Collards

Now there is a true contradiction in terms.

BTW, as a single guy I am lovin this thread - its like an Ultimate Recipe Thread for idiots. Thank you very much and keep 'em coming !

[Dolores Reborn]

Originally posted by Zsofia

Some people say not to wash your mushrooms, though.


I think you're not supposed to wash mushrooms because they will absorb water and get soggy. It won't matter if you're cooking them in a sauce, where they will absorb more liquid. I ALWAYS wash my mushrooms, and they are just fine for everything.

I like this thread, too. I'm not new to cooking, but fast recipes are always wanted!

[Bumbazine]

I looked at my old casserole recipes Fenris, and they aren’t all that simple, so I’m posting this instead:

Mrs. B and I made this up as a snack one evening when we were bored. It isn’t authentic anything.
You will need:
2 boneless, skinless chicken breasts
a can of chili without beans
half an onion, chopped
about half a cup of grated cheese, preferably cheddar
six corn tortillas
Boil the chicken breasts in a saucepan. Put some salt and pepper in the water. Put in some Bay leaves and poultry seasoning if you have some. You’re going to shred the chicken later. While the chicken is cooking, shred some cheese onto a plate, maybe half a cups worth. (We don't measure a lot.) Chop about half a medium onion fairly small, Shove the cheese to one side, and put the onion on the plate too.
When the chicken is cooked, tear it apart with a couple of forks.
Now, spray a skillet with some oil spray, or wipe it with some cooking oil on a paper towel, and put it on the stove on high heat. When it gets hot, quickly hot up six corn tortillas on both sides, one at a time. You want them to get a little brown in spots is all. In fact, I suspect you could skip this step, but they will tend to get a little too soggy later, I think. Extra points if you can flip the tortillas without a utensil. Slide the tortillas off onto another plate as they get crisped.
Turn your oven on to about 300 degrees.
Now you need a casserole dish big enough for two tortillas side by side. Even a cookie sheet with aluminum foil will be okay.
Place 2 tortillas on the dish. Smear some of the chili on each. Do not use more than a quarter of the can for each tortilla. Put a quarter of the chicken on each tortilla. Sprinkle with onion and grated cheese. Put on another tortilla and repeat the chili, chicken, cheese thing. Put the last two tortillas on top. If you have any chili left over, put it on, ditto for onion. Sprinkle some cheese on top.
Put the whole thing into the oven to heat it up. 10 minutes or so. That’s it.
We actually chopped up some jalapenos to go with the onions too, but you can do whatever you want.

In keeping with Delores’ and Zsofia's timely comments earlier, never chop chilis with your bare hands if you are planning to do anything intimate with someone else, or yourself, later in the day. Wear latex gloves or coat your fingers with cooking oil. (for the chili chopping part, but you knew that.)

And now for something completely different:

Quick and Dirty Chicken Curry.

You want to serve this over rice.

A good way to cook rice:
Pour a can of chicken broth into a medium large saucepan.
Put in half a can of water.
Bring to a boil
Stir in a cup of rice. Cover and reduce heat to simmer.
Come back in 5 minutes and stir rice up from bottom of pan.
Re-cover and leave it alone for 20 minutes or until rice is done.

Now for the curry.

2 boneless, skinless chicken breasts
1 can of cream of celery (!) soup (cream of chicken may be substituted)
1 big yellow onion, chopped large
A spot of milk, about a quarter cup (sour cream or even yogurt may be substituted)
A bag of frozen peas and carrots (just peas may be substituted)
Curry powder, lots
Chili powder, about ½ teaspoon
Dash of cinnamon, optional

chop the onion into big (¾ inch) pieces and set aside.
Take the top off the can of soup and set aside.
Chop the chicken up into bite-sized pieces and put them in a pan on medium heat with about a tablespoon of cooking oil. (See comments earlier in thread about washing hands, etc.) Season the chicken as it cooks with salt, pepper and curry powder. When the chicken is cooked through, fling the onions into the pan and sauté until translucent. I've noticed that when the chicken is about done, it starts to 'sweat', that is I will have more liquid in the pan than I started with. The onions should turn yellow from the curry. If they don’t, you need more curry.
When the onions are ready, put in the soup. Add a little milk. If you use sour cream, it will taste different, but just as good. If you use yogurt, it’ll taste…. different.
Add some more salt, pepper, curry powder and chili powder. How much is up to you. It depends on how you like your curry. Taste as you go.
Once the soup is incorporated, put in the frozen veggies. Cook until the veggies are done. When cooked, turn off stove, and, if you like a sweeter curry, stir in a dash or two of cinnamon.
Serve over rice.

For a variation, you can use golden raisins and a tart apple or two, chopped up, instead of the frozen veggies. A little chopped celery would go well in there too.

[Fenris]

Originally posted by Bumbazine
In keeping with Delores’ and Zsofia's timely comments earlier, never chop chilis with your bare hands if you are planning to do anything intimate with someone else, or yourself, later in the day. Wear latex gloves or coat your fingers with cooking oil. (for the chili chopping part, but you knew that.)

Um...I learned this the hard way.

I demand immunity from being mocked over this.

I was chopping chilis barehanded. I needed to urinate. I did. I had an itch in that area. I scratched. I washed my hands and went back to cooking for about...oh...three minutes.

Some things must be experienced to be believed.

Fenris

[techchick68]

Requires a frying pan and a 2 quart casserole dish.

Hamburger Pie


1 small onion chopped
1 lb ground beef
1/2 tsp salt
1/4 tsp pepper
1 can green beans drained (I use the french style)
1 can tomato soup
2 cups mashed potatoes (instant works great)


Preheat oven to 350ºF. Cook onion in a little oil until soft; add beef and brown.

Pour into a 2 quart baking dish. Add seasonings*, stir, then add beans and soup, stir up well. Flatten out the top then layer the mashed potatoes on top*.

Bake for 30 minutes.

6 servings.

* I add in 1 fresh garlic clove minced, to the onion and vary my recipe as I want. Usually I add some oregano, basil or whatever suits my fancy at the time. I also like to add a thin layer of shredded sharp chedder cheese to the top. If I add the cheese I usually cover it lightly with foil then take off the foil during the last 10 minutes. With the garlic and spices addition man your kitchen smells good and it's so easy.

[techchick68]

Shrimp Scampi


2 cloves garlic, minced
1 1/2 pounds large shrimp
1 tbsp butter
3 tbsp oil
salt
pepper
1 tbsp lemon juice
2 tbsp chopped fresh parsley, chopped


Shell and devein shrimp, leaving tails on. In a large frying pan, melt the butter and oil over medium-high heat. Add shrimp and cook, stirring occasionally, until just cooked through, about 5 minutes. Stir in garlic and cook about 30 seconds. Remove from heat, add 1/2 tsp salt 1/4 tsp pepper, lemon juice and parsley and toss until the shrimp are coated. Serve immediately.

4 servings

[techchick68]

Pasta With Garlic


salt
pepper
1/2 pound spaghetti noodles
4 cloves garlic -- minced
1/4 cup olive oil
1/2 tsp anchovy paste (optional!)
3 tbsp chopped fresh parsley
Pinch cayenne pepper
2 tbs butter at room temp


1. Cook spaghetti till al dente; drain.

2. Meanwhile, put oil, garlic, anchovy paste, parsley, cayenne pepper, 1/4 tsp of salt, 1/2 tsp pepper and the butter. Then add in the cooked spaghetti and toss over low heat until butter has melted. Serve immediately.

Serves 4

[Fenris]

Originally posted by techchick68
Pasta With Garlic
1/2 tsp anchovy paste (optional!)

Optional!? Not 'round here, Chickie!

I say: MANDITORY!
"Give Me anchovies or GIVE ME DEATH!"
"And curs'd be he who cries 'enough anchovies!' "
"If anchovies are banned only outlaws will have anchovies." Those're my mottos.

"Those're very strange mottos, Fenris" I hear you say. But I stand by them! They're my moral compass!

Fenris, in an odd mood, but one which anchovies would help

::cracks open a can and has them on Carr's Wheat Crackers with real parmesean cheese slivers. Yum. ::

PS: Kidding aside, all those recipes sounded good TechChick!

[techchick68]

I got this recipe somewhere about 10-12 years ago. I am not a big fan of regular pancakes as they don't seem to digest well and sit like lead -- it's got to be the white flour. If you are like me, try this and I guarantee you will begin to like pancakes again!

Oatmeal Pancakes


1/2 cup whole wheat flour (this is part of why it doesn't sit like lead)
1 1/2 cups rolled oats (not the instant kind)
1 tbsp baking powder
1 tsp salt
1 egg, beaten
1 tsp oil
1 tsp honey
1 1/2 cups of milk


1. Stir the dry ingredients together in a large mixing bowl. Add the remaining ingredients and stir until well mixed.

2. Poor on a hot oiled griddle and turn when the edges begin to get firm.

This makes about 16 pancakes.

< just cutting and pasting from my new web site! >

[techchick68]

How to roast the "perfect chicken!" Roast chicken can be used in other recipes but since you cooked it you know the ingredients that went into it.

Roast Chicken


1 tbsp butter
salt
pepper
6 1/2 - 7 pound roasting chicken


Preheat the oven to 425ºF. Melt the butter in a small saucepan. Stir 1 tsp of salt and 1/2 tsp of pepper into the butter.

Sprinkle 1 tsp salt and 1/4 tsp pepper into the cavity of the chicken. Put the chicken, breast side up, in a roasting pan. Brush the chicken with the melted butter mixture.

Roast the chicken for one hour. Reduce the heat to 350ºF and continue roasting until the skin is golden brown and juices run clear when the inside of the thigh is pierced with a fork, approximately an additional 30 minutes.

Don't forget, the juices from the chicken will make a good gravy!

[techchick68]

If anyone has more recipes or wants some of mine, please email me about my new message board....it's mainly for Colorado people but posting and trading recipes is a HUGE part of it...I didn't want to post the link in case the admins/mods didn't take kindly to that.

Oh and Zenster I completely invite you to be a part of it, you have some wonderful recipes! I just don't want to post recipes from your thread without the okay from the member that posted it!

[techchick68]

Lemon Broccoli Chicken – Soup Recipe

[list]
1 lemon
1 tbsp vegetable oil
1 skinless, boneless chicken breast halves
1 can Cream of Broccoli Soup
¼ cup milk
1/8 tsp pepper
[list]

1. Cut 4 thin lemon slices; squeeze 2 tsp juice from remaining lemon. Set aside.

2. In skillet, in hot oil, cook chicken 10 minutes or until browned. Remove; set aside. Spoon off fat.

3. In skillet, combine soup, milk reserved lemon juice and pepper. Heat to boiling. Return chicken to skillet; top with lemon slices.

4. Cover, cook over low heat 5 minutes or until chicken is no longer pink, stirring often.

4 servings

[OxyMoron]

Originally posted by Fenris
[snip] That may be a little advanced for someone who once wanted to know how to make hard-boiled eggs)

Fenris

Fenris, Fenris, FENRIS!

You never "boil" eggs. Never!

Christian's Patented Hard-Cooked Eggs

The key with eggs is that they generally don't take well to being cooked at high heat. Boiling an egg will make the white rubbery and may make the yolk green or the shell crack.

Here's what you'll need:

Eggs
A Pot with a Lid
A Timer (your microwave probably has one - now would be a good time to figure it out)
A Pushpin (not one of the flat kind - one that you can really hold)
A Big Slotted Spoon
Lots of Very Cold or Ice Water
Optional: a little vinegar (any kind, white's cheap and will clean your coffeemaker, too)


Here's what you do:

1) Start with bunch of eggs. Old eggs. Don't use the ones you bought this morning - use the ones that are in the back of the fridge. Or if you do actually set out to buy eggs for boiling, leave them out for a couple of days, sitting on the counter. Nattering Nutritional Nabobs don't like this idea, but eggs will keep at room temperature for 5-7 days (Time-Life Good Cooks series).

2) Take a pushpin. (I use a trussing needle, but it sounds like your friend isn't the sort of guy who has trussing needles lying around.) Hold an egg firmly in one hand. With the other hand take the pushpin and poke a small hole in the large end of the egg. Repeat for each egg. You see, as the egg ages, gas builds up at this end of the egg. When you heat it, it will expand and crack the shell. With the hole poked, the gas will just bubble out harmlessly.

3) Gently put the eggs in one layer on the bottom of a large pot that has a lid. Add water until it covers the eggs by about an inch. If you have vinegar on hand, add a tablespoon or so to the water. If a shell does, in fact, break, the vinegar will encourage the white to congeal quickly and seal the shell from breaking further.

4) Set the pot, uncovered but with the lid handy, over high heat.

5) Now you'll need to pay a bit of attention, but not much. You want to bring the eggs up to a boil, and then stop. What does "to a boil" mean? Well, you could hold the pot up to that nasty zit on your ass, but...oh, where was I? It means that you're just starting to get big, rolling bubbles in the pot, which jiggle the eggs around a bit. I find this takes about 8-10 minutes, but YMMV depending on the pot and how hot your cooktop runs.

You could test it by inserting your hand...

:p

Oh, never mind.

6) Once the pot has come to a boil, remove it from heat and put the lid on. (On the pot, not your head.) Now you set the timer. If you've got large or extra-large eggs, 8 minutes. If jumbo, 9 minutes.

7) When the timer buzzes, stir the eggs so they shuffle around. Put the lid back on, and reset the timer for 8 minutes if large, 9 minutes if extra-large, or 10 minutes if jumbo. Fill the sink with really cold water - add a tray or two of ice if needed.

8) When the timer buzzes the second time, take your slotted spoon and plunge each egg (a big spoon's a plus, it'll hold several eggs at once) into the ice water. Leave the eggs there for at least 10-15 minutes.

9) You can either shell the eggs now, or keep them shelled. Although it freezes my hands, I shell 'em while they're in the cold water 'cuz it's really easy, and 'cuz I'm a masochist. If you save 'em for later, they shell easiest if you do it under running water.

This sounds Terribly Complicated, but it really isn't. Do a dozen and you've got cheap, easy protein for days. Unless you've got a cholesterol problem, this is a great snack.

[techchick68]

xt, xt...you make it seem so complicated....sheesh.

Here's what my grandma's 1962 Betty Crocker cook book says. Oh and they state to have the eggs at room temp so the shells don't crack, but I think times have changed since more is known about food poisoning.

Soft Cooked In the shell

Cold Water start - Cover completely with cold water (one layer) heat until water boils. Remove from heat and let stand for 2-4 minutes

Boiling Water Start - Boil enough water to cover one layer of eggs. Carefully lower into water with a spoon, ladle. reduce heat, keep simmering 3-5 minutes.

Hard Cooked Eggs

Cold Water Start -- Follow directions for above let stand off the heat for about 25 minutes.

Boiling Water Start -- Follow direction for above except let the water simmer for about 20 minutes.

[GrizzRich]

You're probably gonna hafta wait 'til winter again for this...
And it's best when shared, or a lot of it goes to waste. Because it's not suited well for re-freezing.

You'll need...
-snow (about one gallon volume. this works best with snow that just barely holds a snowball shape)
-one can condensed milk
-sugar.

Put snow in a LARGE bowl. Add the whole can of condensed milk, at bit at a time, stirring frequently.
Add sugar to taste.
Enjoy immediately.
You may be able to freeze leftovers, but it turns very hard.

[lestrange]

I just tried this one this week--it's insanely easy:

Fudge.

1 14oz can of sweetened condensed milk
3 cups of chocolate chips (1 bag is two cups)
dash of salt
1 1/2 teaspoons of vanilla extract.

Get a 9x9 sqare pan (or a regular round cake pan) and put wax paper in the bottom. To get the circle for the round pan, trace the pan bottom on the paper and cut out the circle. Put the condensed milk, salt, and chocolate chips in a sauce pan--melt over low heat, keep stirring! It doesn't take long. When it's all one big pan of smooth, chocolatey goo, take off the heat and add your vanilla. Mix it all around. If you're feeling extravagent, you can add some chopped nuts here, too. Shovel the whole mess into the cake pan (use a rubber spatula so you don't lose any of it), spread it around until it's even, and refrigerate for an hour or two. Take it out, dump it out of the pan (you may need to run a knife around the edge), cut it into pieces, and wrap in saran wrap. Store it in the fridge.

[techchick68]

This one sounds sooooo yummy, I am a potato freak and every time I read this recipe I start to drool! I haven't tried it yet but as much as I love potatoes with a creamy sauce I get all giddy like a school girl.

Creamy Autumn Potatoes


1 tbsp butter
1/2 cup Ore-Ida Chopped Onions
1/2-1 clove garlic minced
1 can condensed cream of celery or cream of mushroom soup
1 package cream cheese cut in cubes
3 - 4 cups Frozen Ore-Ida Southern Style Hash Browns; they state you can use their Potatoes Obrien if you prefer.
1/3 cup shredded chedder cheese (may use mozerella)


Heat butter in a saucepan until melted: add onions and garlic and cook over medium-high heat until tender. Stir in undiluted soup and the cream cheese until smooth and thoroughly heated, stirring constantly. Alternately layer frozen potatoes and hot soup mixture in buttered 2-quart casserole, ending with sauce layer. Cover and bake at 400ºF (preheated) 45 minutes or until sauce is bubbly and potatoes are tender. Remove from oven and sprinkle with shredded chedder cheese.

Makes 4-5 servings

[OxyMoron]

Originally posted by techchick68
xt, xt...you make it seem so complicated....sheesh.
[snip]
Hard Cooked Eggs

Cold Water Start -- Follow directions for above let stand off the heat for about 25 minutes.

Boiling Water Start -- Follow direction for above except let the water simmer for about 20 minutes.

[/QUOTE]

I've based my procedure on a slightly later Betty, actually. The extra steps (which take longer to describe than to do, honest!) are designed to prevent three problems prevalent when using the unadorned Betty technique:

1) The Sticky Shell. I HATE it when I lose half the egg 'cos the shell won't loosen. A little research in other books revealed the Old Egg Rule and the Cold Water Plunge.

2) The Rubbery White and Green Yolk. Eww. Eggs should not bounce, and that green yolk just ain't appealing. The white should be firm, but tender. That means no boiling. Simmering works - but that requires a lot of attention, and on some stoves it's really hard to regulate.

3) The Exploded Egg. Messy. Vinegar I learned from poaching eggs, and poking a hole helps too. The hole also seems to help with the sticky shell, tho' I haven't tested this empirically.

[johnny fishface]

Here's an easy one:

Mushy Joes (a variation on Sloppy Joe's)

1 lb. hamburger
1 can Cream of Mushroom soup
1 pkg. hamburger buns
salt and pepper

Cook the hamburger like you would sloppy Joe's, crumbled. Add salt and pepper (I go heavy on the pepper, light on the salt). Drain the grease and add the can of soup. That's about it. Even though you can eat it right away I generally let it cook for awhile - seems to soak up the soup and taste better. Also, I don't drain all the grease, grease = flavor.