The 12 Pains of Christmas
Holy Shit! It's Christmas
Walking in an Essex Wonderland
You can make an ornament from a Bud Can
And then yous can hang it from the tree
'Sherry are you pregnant?', she'll say 'No man'
But I'm 13 so ain't it time to be?
We're calling Donnie up in jail
We're raising money to post his bail
Our neighbor is cranked and Uncle Jimmy is tanked
We're walking in an Essex Wonderland
Happy Holidays Hon