When a store clerk says "How are you today"...

[twickster]

...I say, "I'm good, thanks, how are you?" And I look at the person and smile.

My best friend mutters "okay" or "fine" and doesn't even look up.

What do you say?

[Phlosphr]

On a Happy Day: Good thanks, and yourself? Thats a nice blouse/shirt/dress etc..etc...

Sad Day: Ok and you?

Bad Day: Alive. You?

Disgustingly happy day: Great! Thanks for Ask'in!!

[Bangiadore]

Mostly I have variants of Phlosphr's replies. On days when I'm semi-comatose, I might respond "OhmyGodI'msosleepytoday!Ijustcan'twakeup!", but I almost always try to smile and make eye contact, except if I'm having a downright crappy day.

I'm with twickster on the smile thing, and I usually get one back. If I don't, no biggie, 'cause the cashier might be the one having a rough day. I've worked in retail once upon a time, and I know it isn't easy standing in one place for hours dealing with people who often treat you as if you're a robot. OTOH, when I run across a really beastly clerk like the one in the record store the other day...grrrrr.

[misstee]

Hey Phlosphr - you stole my chipper happy day reply.


Great! Thanks for asking, and how are you today?

[jlzania]

Fair to middling most days.
And how are you?

[Debaser]

I get myself in the habit (usually) of answering such questions automatically with something like "I'm great." or "Never been better." Even if I'm in a foul mood, there's no sense in broadcasting it to the world if I can't help it.

I don't ask back, though. I'm not particularly interested in having a conversation with a store clerk.

[cornflakes]

I walk right up, let my face beam with a light that outshines the sun, smile and take the initiative to say "Good Morning! It is a good morning, isn't it!" in an upbeat lilt that would make Zig Ziglar puke his toenails out.

Ok, I don't lay it on that thick, but I am usually the first one to say something like "Morning, how are you doing?" and then playing it by ear based on how the clerk responds. I really like hearing what people outside my life have to say. On a few really crummy days where the clerk asked, I've answered with "ehh... I'm doin' ", said as an honest acknowledgement, not as a dismissive or pitiful gesture.

[Wonko The Sane]

When asked by a salesdrone, I always ask them how they are doing, and they /always/ say they are doing well, and I tell them "good" in a very positive sincere, way. Then they move on, just as I wanted.

At the register, I'm often asked if "I found everything I was looking for today"; I usually tell them I was unable to find that "Big Bag of Cash" that I was looking for in the store. Nobody seems to know where it is.

[Small Clanger]

When a store clerk says "How are you today"...

I'd go into (mute) shock. I'm English for heavensake I don't do personal conversations (no matter how bland) with strangers.

If I've wandered into another country where they do this sort of thing I might manage an 'OK thanks' but I certainly wouldn't ask back.

[interface2x]

No matter my mood, I usually hear myself say "Not bad, and yourself?" before I know I've said it.

[foxymoron]

On a good/average day, I say, with moderate enthusiasm, "Good, thanks! How are you?"

On a so-so day, "I'm alright," but with a half-smile so I don't sound like Eeyore. Usually I'll add a "...thanks. How are you?"

On a lousy day, the clerk gets an "Oh, y'know...could be better, could be worse. Thanks for asking, though. How are you?"

[Morelin]

Originally Posted by Wonko The Sane

At the register, I'm often asked if "I found everything I was looking for today"; I usually tell them I was unable to find that "Big Bag of Cash" that I was looking for in the store. Nobody seems to know where it is.

As a clerk, I always tell the customer I just gave it away 10 minutes ago.

And I try very hard to smile, even though that joke was only funny once. In 1972.

[kidchameleon]

Originally Posted by Morelin

As a clerk, I always tell the customer I just gave it away 10 minutes ago.

And I try very hard to smile, even though that joke was only funny once. In 1972.

It's not as bad as when something doesn't scan and they say, "It must be free!". Of course, even scarier are the people that actually believe that.

[Vision of Love]

I usually just say "I'm good, thanks" and smile. I usually don't ask them how they're doing because I'm sure half of the time they aren't even expecting it. Their reply would likely be "Oh, me? Uh... well....... I'm good, I guess. Thanks, yeah."

[Shakes]

Ugh! This is one of my worst social habbits. All to often if I go to a restraunt and the waiter/waitress ask me "How are you" I usaully respond with.. "I'll have an iced tea, beer, ect.. to start with"

I always feel so bad after doing that because I know it's incredibly rude...

[six_personalities]

I tell them about my ingrowing toenail/boil/gum infection...
Well they asked

[TeaElle]

I say "Better than I deserve, how about you?" It's a little different, and usually catches people by surprise. (What's most fun is when they identify the radio guy I stole that line from.)

[six_personalities]

Or....'The voices tell me I'm fine'...

[ColonelDax]

I usually just say "hi" in return and get down to business. While I don't intend to be rude, I figure that the obligatory "how are you today?" stuff has been foisted on the store clerks of the world by the store operators of the world, and I don't actually think for a second that a store clerk particularly cares how I'm doing.

[chappachula]

Originally Posted by SHAKES

All too often if I go to a restraunt and the waiter/waitress ask me "How are you" I usaully respond with.. "I'll have an iced tea, beer, ect.. to start with"

When the waitress says "Hi, I'm Debbie, and I'll be your waitress today", I've always wanted to respond "Hi, I'm David, and I'll be your customer today"

... but I've never actually dunnit.

[Mockingbird]

Originally Posted by chappachula

When the waitress says "Hi, I'm Debbie, and I'll be your waitress today", I've always wanted to respond "Hi, I'm David, and I'll be your customer today"

... but I've never actually dunnit.

The Simpsons already did it.

[chappachula]

Originally Posted by Mockingbird

The Simpsons already did it.

What, you expect me, to watch the Simpsons?.This is the straightdope-- the finest collection of intellect ever gathered (since 1973, I suppose), and I am a fully paid-up member (and I got it for half price , 1 day before the deadline last April )
And yet you think I should be aware of Homer Simpson, and apologize for stealing his line?


Well, okay---I'll admit it. I missed a couple of episodes. Duh!!!

[Green Bean]

Originally Posted by chappachula

When the waitress says "Hi, I'm Debbie, and I'll be your waitress today", I've always wanted to respond "Hi, I'm David, and I'll be your customer today"

... but I've never actually dunnit.

Please keep not doing it. Thanks.