RA--RA-CANADA email

[bernse]

I got this from my sister, a Canadian living in the US. I guess it makes her feel better. I am just sharing it "'cause". I thought most of it was dumb, but whatever. I apologize if this has been posted before. There really isn't much in here to be "proud? of though, that I can see.. other than Coffee Crisp. Mmmmm..

> >
WHAT CANADIANS HAVE TO BE PROUD OF....

1. Smarties

2. Crispy Crunch

3. Coffee Crisp

4. The size of our footballs, fields and one less down.

5. Lacrosse is Canadian.

6. Hockey is Canadian.

7. Basketball is Canadian.

8. The biggest flags ever seen at any Olympic ceremony were
Canadian twice. The second one was smuggled in by the athletes because they made a rule against it after the first time.

10. Mr. Dress-up can kick Mr. Rogers ass

11. Much Music kicks MTV's ass.

12. Maple syrup kicks Mrs. Butterworth's ass (...Aunt Jemima's too!!).

13. Tim Horton's kicks Dunkin Donuts' ass.

14. Waaaay better beer commercials/contests and beer company
giveaways. For example the Molson Canadian House Party ... where you get to keep the house. Trashed or not.

15. In the war of 1812, we pushed the Americans so far back past their 'White House' ... we burned it and most of washington under the command of William Lyon McKenzie who was insane and hammered all the time. We got bored because they ran away. So we came home and partied. Go figure.

16. Canada has the largest French population that never
surrendered to Germany.

17. The largest English population that never ever surrendered or withdrew during any war.

18. Our civil war was a big bar fight that lasted a little over an hour.

19. The only person who was arrested in our civil war was an American mercenary, who slept in and missed the whole thing ... but showed up just in time to get caught.

20. We knew plaid was cool far before Seattle caught on.

21. The Hudsons Bay Company once owned over 10% of the earths surface and is still around as the world's oldest company.

22. The average dog sled team can kill and devour a full grown human in under 3 minutes.

23. We don't have New Jersey.

24. We don't marry our kinfolk.

25. We invented the telephone, ski-doos, jet-skis, velcro, zippers and the long distance and short wave radios that save countless lives each year.
Oh ya ... and the handles on beer cases big enough to fit your hands with mitts on.

26. We can hum the tune to 'Definition'.

27. We all know that a scale that measures boiling water at 212 degrees and freezes at 32 is asinine.

28. We've ALL frozen our tongues to something metal and lived to tellabout it.

29. We don't wear socks with our sandals.

30. We can outdrink Americans in a heartbeat!!

[Nymysys]

I second all of the above. Plus, you forgot that Cretien kicks any American politicos ASS!

I'm getting ready to marry a Torontoan just to get a damn green card to Canada. I'm tired of this joint.

[Mr. Cynical]

WHAT CANADIANS HAVE TO BE ASHAMED OF....

1. You have Concrete. 'Nuff Said.

[Bear_Nenno]

How the hell do you figure Basketball is Canadian???

"In 1891, James Naismith, a physical education instructor at the YMCA Training school in Springfield Massachusetts, decided to try a new game for his students. Naismith, a former divinity student, had played rugby and disliked the rough aspect of the game. He wanted to find a team game that would eliminate physical contact. He asked the janitor to hang two peach baskets from the balcony of the gymnasium. They used a soccer ball for their first game."

Also, I think the fact that you can fit all the things you have to be proud of on a 30 item list says a lot about the country.

AND MOST IMPORTANTLY:

Shouldn't mega the roo be #1 on that list?!?! Any Canadian list without mega is suspect in my opinion!

[RickJay]

Originally posted by bernse
I got this from my sister, a Canadian living in the US. I guess it makes her feel better. I am just sharing it "'cause". I thought most of it was dumb, but whatever. I apologize if this has been posted before. There really isn't much in here to be "proud? of though, that I can see.. other than Coffee Crisp. Mmmmm..

This already ended up on can.politics, so let me post the responses that were patiently posted in there by truly patriotic Canadians.

WHAT CANADIANS HAVE TO BE PROUD OF....

1. Smarties
2. Crispy Crunch
3. Coffee Crisp

All British.

4. The size of our footballs, fields and one less down.
5. Lacrosse is Canadian.
6. Hockey is Canadian.
7. Basketball is Canadian.

Basketball is American in origin and American today, not
Canadian. The fact that the guy who invented it had once lived in Canada (he invented it in the U.S. and never lived in Canada again, and hadn't for years and years) doesn't mean much.

Lacrosse is more popular in the U.S. than it is in Canada. I'll grant you hockey. Canadian football isn't substantially different from the original American game.

8. The biggest flags ever seen at any Olympic ceremony were Canadian twice. The second one was smuggled in by the athletes because they made a rule against it after the first time.

Lord only knows what this means.

10. Mr. Dress-up can kick Mr. Rogers ass

Ernie Coombs, TV's Mr. Dressup, was from the United States.

14. Waaaay better beer commercials/contests and beer company giveaways. For example the Molson Canadian House Party ... where you get to keep the house. Trashed or not.

As a Canadian, I am sincerely repelled by the thought of my country being represented by what basically amount to corporate drug dealers.

15. In the war of 1812, we pushed the Americans so far back past their 'White House'

Complete fantasy. The attack on Washington was conducted by British troops. This is akin to saying we won the battle of Gettysburg.

[QUOTE[... we burned it and most of washington under the command of William Lyon McKenzie [/quote]

Fantasy.

17. The largest English population that never ever surrendered or withdrew during any war.

England has never withdrawn from any war? Evidently the author of this post is retarded. (I know it isn't you.)

18. Our civil war was a big bar fight that lasted a little over an hour.

Doubly retarded. Canada has had four different armed rebellions; three of them were very serious armed isurrections involving armies that were way beyond "bar fights." Maybe if you've never left Toronto you think the Upper Canada rebellion was our Civil War, but I am sure people who actually know about Canada can tell you about the Riel rebellions and the Lower Canada rebellion of 1837, all bloody conflicts.

19. The only person who was arrested in our civil war was an American mercenary...

See above. Never heard of Louis Riel, or the dozens of Quebecois "patriotes" who the Canadian government hanged?

20. We knew plaid was cool far before Seattle caught on.
21. The Hudsons Bay Company once owned over 10% of the earths surface and is still around as the world's oldest company.

Like Canada invented plaid. Oh, and the Hudson's Bay Company was a British corporation.

25. We invented the telephone, ski-doos, jet-skis, velcro, zippers and the long distance and short wave radios that save countless lives each year.

The man who invented the radio was not Canadian, and he wasn't in Canada when he invented it. God only knows where the heck THAT comes from.

Alexander Graham Bell wasn't Canadian, either.

Velcro was not invented in Canada.

Neither were zippers.

26. We can hum the tune to 'Definition'.

Finally, something I'm proud of...

30. We can outdrink Americans in a heartbeat!!

..and something I'm not. "I can do more crack than a German!"

[Bear_Nenno]

Good job RickJay.

See, I knew it was all wrong.

[kellibelli]

Originally posted by Nymysys
I second all of the above. Plus, you forgot that Cretien kicks any American politicos ASS!

I'm getting ready to marry a Torontoan just to get a damn green card to Canada. I'm tired of this joint.

Oh for fuck's sake, there is more to canada than TORONTO!


And as far as concrete, all his ancestors were american - so there!

And Rickjay, man, you sure are thorough. Mean, and heartless, but thorough.

[tisiphone]

Just to fill my daily quota . . .

"Our fair country Canada
Is north of the U.S.A.
Our Maritimes are lovely,
Our Prairies give us hay.
You might think you Yankees
Are better than us Canucks,
But we don't need no microchips
Inside our hockey pucks!
We know that you've got Disneyland,
and you keep it very clean.
We don't have Bob Dole,
We can drink when we're nineteen.
We may watch your TV shows for hours and hours and hours
We'll give you Alan Thicke, but Shania Twain is ours!

We're
Prou-oud to be Canadian . . ."

The Arrogant Worms - "Proud to be Canadian"

[bernse]

Bah, nothing heartless about it. Most if it was just BS made up by freaks who obvisously didn't research some things very well :-) I knew a lot of it was suspicious, but not that much.

Thanks RickJay

[Odieman]

Of course Mr Rogers is Canadian, which totally muddys the issue

[Emperor Penguin]

Originally posted by tisiphone
The Arrogant Worms - "Proud to be Canadian"

These guys are truly Canada's national treasure.

And I have to agree with RickJay

As a Canadian, I am sincerely repelled by the thought of my country being represented by what basically amount to corporate drug dealers.

It is an interesting comment on your country when the greatest source of national pride lately has been inspired by beer advertisements.

At my sisters elementary school the other day it said "I am Canadian" on the wall in big cut out construction paper letters (i.e., not sanctioned by Molson). It didn't bother me that much, because I know its harmless, I just don't like the idea of using beer slogans in schools. I mean, really it is akin to having a sign saying "You're in Marlboro country" hanging from the ceiling. I realize that it won't send kids running to the bar after school, but still it bugs me all the same.

Anyhoo, enough of this little tangent. I just wanted to get that off of my chest.

[mega the roo]

Shouldn't mega the roo be #1 on that list?!?! Any Canadian list without mega is suspect in my opinion!

Awww, shucks.

[racinchikki]

Some of my favorite race car drivers have been Canadian.

My great-grandmother was Canadian. Half French and half Native American. Used to holler at us in French. Made great toast. Died when I was 4.

Paul Brandt is Canadian. So are Bryan Adams, Celine Dion, Shania Twain and Alanis Morisette, not that I personally would want to claim those last three. Oh yes, and the Tragically Hip. And BNL.

[matt_mcl]

Originally posted by corvus
At my sisters elementary school the other day it said "I am Canadian" on the wall in big cut out construction paper letters (i.e., not sanctioned by Molson). It didn't bother me that much, because I know its harmless, I just don't like the idea of using beer slogans in schools.
[/b]

The idea that Molson could ever have any sort of authority over the statement "I am Canadian" is disgusting. "I am Canadian" isn't a marketing slogan: it's a statement of fact.

[Erroneous]

I don't know if they even showed the Olympic closing ceremony in the States due to the crappy ratings and everyhitg, but I can confirm that a small group of athletes did in fact have a huge freaking Canadian flag out during it. This was during the bit when all the athletes were in the centre of the stadium, and since no other athletes had national flags, it would be safe to assume that the Canadians did some smuggling. So that much might be true.

[kellibelli]

Originally posted by matt_mcl

The idea that Molson could ever have any sort of authority over the statement "I am Canadian" is disgusting. "I am Canadian" isn't a marketing slogan: it's a statement of fact.

Damn right!!

Thank you matt, you are gonna be a great addition to the govt!

[Emperor Penguin]

Originally posted by matt_mcl
The idea that Molson could ever have any sort of authority over the statement "I am Canadian" is disgusting. "I am Canadian" isn't a marketing slogan: it's a statement of fact.

Sad but true, but what can you do?

In other news, how is the campaign going? I'm personally not a big fan of the NDP (because I'm in BC. Can you say Fast Cat Ferries? Or how about the Doctors strike?), but, in truth, it was more a problem with Glen Clark, rather than the party platform. They seem to be doing a bit better now that he is gone. From what I have read on this board though, you will make an excellent addition to the Govt.

[Wendell Wagner]

From the OP:

> 13. Tim Horton's kicks Dunkin Donuts' ass.

Probably true, but so what? Dunkin' Donuts are decent but hardly great examples of doughnuts in the U.S. (Many people say Krispy Kreme are better, for instance.) This is like saying that you have a better chain of hamburger joints than McDonalds, for instance. That would be an easy claim to make, since McDonalds make some of the worst hamburgers in the U.S. Wouldn't it be a better idea not to represent ourselves by big corporations? I don't want Mickey Mouse to represent the U.S. to the rest of the world. I think much of what the Disney company produces is crap. Whatever pride I have in the U.S. has nothing with big corporations, most of whom are multi-nationals who don't make most of their products in the U.S. anyway.

[Crusoe]

I'd like to thank Canada for Mark Watson and Carlo Corazzin.

[Zyada]

Originally posted by Mr. Cynical
WHAT CANADIANS HAVE TO BE ASHAMED OF....

1. You have Concrete. 'Nuff Said.

I wouldn't be too sure about that - in his incarnation as Lloyd he said he lived here in Dallas-Ft. Worth and was going to come to a dopefest ::shudder::