Rookie seeks cat behavior modification advice

[Asimovian]

The background here is that, although I generally like cats, I have never lived with or cared for cats prior to the beginning of 2011. However, I am now house- and cat-sitting for the next six months. My two feline companions, Smoke and Mirrors, are healthy young ladies, and their owner has told me that they basically just need food, water, a clean litter box and some affection, and they'll be fine.

Smoke, the older of the two (I think she's around six, but I'm not positive), has been content since I've moved in to just go about her life as normal. She'll pop up for the occasional pet now and then, just to make sure I remember her, but otherwise, she seems entirely self-sufficient.

Mirrors, on the other hand is less than two years-old and is very kitten-like. She is extremely playful and constantly seeking my attention. I'm guessing this is a combination of missing her owner and it just being her nature, but she wants to be around me. All the time.

Generally speaking, this is no issue at all. I give her affection and play with her when I can, and otherwise, I acknowledge her and just walk around her. It can be difficult to resist the pet-me-flop, but I manage when I need to. The problem comes with sleeping. The owner always left his bedroom door open and allowed the cats to hunker down with him at night. For me, however, having Mirrors jumping on and off the bed and swatting at my toes any time I dare to move them doesn't work well, as I'm a fairly light sleeper.

What I've been doing to this point has been allowing her to hang out with me in the bedroom when I get home from work for an hour or so, and then kicking her out when I'm actually going to sleep (Smoke usually will stick her head in the bedroom for five minutes to sniff around and say hi, but doesn't seem to have any desire to stick around). Mirrors would usually make a momentary protest when I closed the door, but that would be it. When I'd open the door in the morning, I'd find her laying right in front of it, waiting for me, and then giving me the "It's about damn time" meow.

But for the last two nights, however, the protests have changed. I can't quite tell whether she is scratching at the door with her claws or scratching at it with one of her toys, but two nights ago, she was making a lot of noise at the door and clearly trying to push it open. In between efforts, there was a lot of plaintive yowling (to the extent she can -- she sort of squeak-yowls). This went on for about five minutes before I pushed the door shut hard all the way. She seemed to settle down after that.

Last night, however, was a different story. She didn't stop. It went on for about 20 minutes. I finally went out and put Mirrors in the bathroom with the door shut so that I could get to sleep. However, I realized that this was a poor solution. The bathroom contains the litter box, so I'm either keeping Smoke from getting to it in the middle of the night (which I would assume is a VERY bad thing), or I'm locking Smoke in the bathroom with Mirrors (Smoke hangs out in the bathroom on her own and hides in the cabinets, so I never know if she's in there or not), which isn't tragic, but is also less than ideal.

All of this is a very long preface to ask you the following: is there some way to get Mirrors to cease the nighttime protests without having to punish her (and, incidentally Smoke)? What do you suggest?

[Merneith]

Let Mirrors do whatever the hell she wants. You'll get used to it in a few weeks, Rookie.

[WhyNot]

Well, we prefer to call it "behavior modification" these days. "Punishment" is just so barbaric.

Get a jar or can with a lid. (The plastic container from Crystal Light drink mix works very well.) Put a handful of pennies in it. Tape the lid on. (Trust me, that's important.)

When she scratches at the door, shake the can. She'll scat. In 20 minutes, she'll come back. Shake the can again. Lather, rinse and repeat. (Only metaphorically. She wouldn't like being lathered for real.)

You'll have a night of rattle and roll, but that will very likely extinguish the behavior.

If not, it's time to get a spray bottle full of water with a few drops of hot sauce in it to smell really bad. I'm sure you can figure out what to do from there. This option isn't as good, because you need to open the door to spray her, and simply seeing you may be reward enough to encourage her to keep at it.

[Brynda]

Why the change? My guess is that she is fonder of you (and who wouldn't be?) and wants to spend more time with you. Be firm and wait her out. You can try WhyNot's excellent suggestions to speed things up, but this is going to take patience until she learns that no matter how much she begs, she doesn't get to come in. Whatever you do, don't relent. That just teaches her that if she protests enough, she gets her way.

[silenus]

What Merneith said.

Amateur.

Bow to your (temporary) feline overlords and be done with it.

[Scubaqueen]

kittens/very young adults are batshit crazy at times and need more exercise than full adults.

some cats are extremely social even with complete strangers, and some never show their faces unless the dinner bell is being rung.

mirrors is apparently going to be the former and is going to be a snuggler like my girl, maggie. i can't even sit down without almost immediately finding a sudden cat in my lap.

i'm guessing you haven't been there long. does mirrors have toys to play with? a kitty fishing rod or catnip mousies and so on that you can use to tire her out more in the evenings before lights out? suggestion: i got a cheap little laser pointer. best investment i ever made. i have actually tired maggie out so badly she falls asleep in the middle of playing.

try the 'tire her out' ploy and see if that helps. eventually she'll settle down and not try to hijack your toes every few seconds, but that's just what younguns do. if you keep the door closed, that likely will lead to her trying to dig her way under the door: A Very Bad Thing for the carpet.

smoke and mirrors. best cat names since 'bert.'

[Asimovian]

Originally Posted by Scubaqueen

smoke and mirrors. best cat names since 'bert.'

Just wait until "Smoke and Mirrors meet the Berts" happens in a few months (yes, really). It's going to be an interesting household.

Thank you for all of the suggestions (well, almost all of them ) thus far. I definitely don't have any intention of giving in to Mirrors' desire. What's funny (but not surprising, for a cat) is that she *isn't* that much of a cuddler. She doesn't seem to have any desire to be held, or even petted for a really long time. She just wants you to sit still and know that you're around. She starts protesting whenever I'm moving around too much.

During the weekend, when I was home a lot, I just hung out in the bedroom with the door open so the cats could come and go as they please. The two of them did nap at my feet for a while, but most of the time, Mirrors was off doing her own thing, just coming in once in a while to look at me, meow ("You're still there? Cool."), and then leave again.

[Merneith]

The thing is, they're not your cats. And more specifically, your not their human. Their human disappeared and suddenly there's you. It's not surprising that they'd be both clingy and standoff-ish. You can probably convince Mirrors to leave you alone, if you're serious about it. But your best plan at the moment is to keep the cats as comfortable and secure as possible. That means cuddling or not cuddling on their demand and, most importantly, not changing their schedule around any more than necessary.

And the reason I say this is *your* best plan is because unhappy cats are cats with digestive problems. Cats with digestive problems never make it to the litter box in time. Vomiting cats don't even bother. I'm sure they're perfectly behaved cats when their owner's around. But their owner isn't around - that's the problem.

Basically, given that these are not your cats, I think your best bet is just to chill and let them do their thing. Right now, this arrangement is still new. They need time to adjust.

[Asimovian]

Originally Posted by Merneith

Basically, given that these are not your cats, I think your best bet is just to chill and let them do their thing. Right now, this arrangement is still new. They need time to adjust.

I understand, I think, the logic in what you're saying. The problem is that letting them do exactly what they've been used to means I don't sleep for a while. And that's troublesome when it comes to me being able to function at work. The owner has told me to do what I need to do and that they'll adjust. I want to find something workable for them AND for me.

[WhyNot]

Right. And, if I understand it correctly, soon enough Smoke and Mirrors will be joining your household.

Have you and Smoke and Mirrors' owner discussed the cats-on-the-bed-overnight issue between you? That's going to need to be sorted out sooner or later, as well.

[Asimovian]

Originally Posted by WhyNot

Right. And, if I understand it correctly, soon enough Smoke and Mirrors will be joining your household.

Have you and Smoke and Mirrors' owner discussed the cats-on-the-bed-overnight issue between you? That's going to need to be sorted out sooner or later, as well.

We might be mixing up owners, here.

My buddy who is out of the country for six months is the owner of Smoke and Mirrors. He has said to do whatever I needed to do with them to be comfortable, including kicking them out of rooms and such. He is well aware that I haven't lived with cats, and he feels that they are going to be more flexible than I am in that regard. We have not specifically discussed *this* issue because it just came up two nights ago (and I don't really feel like I need to bother him with it). But he knew before he left the country that I wasn't planning on sleeping with the cats in bed with me.

When my girlfriend moves out here with me, she will be bringing the 'Berts with her, and so we will temporarily have four cats together. But when my buddy returns and she and I leave, we will have only the Berts, so Smoke and Mirrors will be able to return to their regularly scheduled whatevering.

[WhyNot]

Originally Posted by Asimovian

We might be mixing up owners, here. .

Ah, indeed. Sorry about that.

But still, six months is long enough that you shouldn't be at the mercy of a rude cat. I wish you luck, sir!

[Cat Whisperer]

You don't have to surrender - my cat does exactly what Mirrors is doing, and we use a Ssscat cat repellent at the bedroom door to train her to piss off. We used it for a couple of nights until she got the idea - the bedroom door is not for thumping against and howling at and scratching at all night long. We still have to turn it on occasionally to tune her back up, but mostly she leaves the door alone now.

ETA: We kick the cats out for the same reason - when my cat decides it's play time, she starts jumping on me with really hard feet. Jim is also allergic to cats, so the bedroom is a limited cat area.

[Asimovian]

It occurs to me that I have violated a board tenet by not posting an obligatory picture of the culprit.

[Cat Whisperer]

AWWWWwww - who's a cute widdle pain in the ass? (And the cat's not bad, either! )

She even lies like my cat - paws under, head out, eyes staring yearningly at you, wishing you'd come play with her already.

[Asimovian]

She is very content to be curled up near me right now in bed. If I thought she'd stay that way all night, I'd just leave her. She's adorable.

Little scoundrel.

[HazelNutCoffee]

We just shut Olive in the living room (it has a door) with a litterbox and food and water. I love my cat but I need my sleep, and having her trying to sit on my head at 3am does not make me happy.

[Rachellelogram]

Who couldn't let that cat have its wicked way with his affections!? I must now denigrate you for being a heartless monster (who takes really good pictures).

[Markxxx]

When I was little I had a cat like this, it HATED closed doors. It would paw at them until they opened, then she'd peak in, then leave.

You may want to "train" the cat to sleep with you on your conditions. Cats like to sleep on their terms. I'd get into bed, with a book and when the cat comes in, wait till she jumps up and settles in. Then gently bump her awake. She'll give you a look. Then wait for her to settle down and close her eyes. Then wake her up again. Then she'll probably give you a "mew" then go back to sleep. Then once her eyes are closed, bump her awake again.

She'll eventually get miffed at this, and leave you alone.

The only thing cats hate more than being woken up is when you pet them in the wrong direction their fur grows in. They hate that. So you could instead of "bumping her" awake, once she falls asleep, pet her in the wrong direction.

[t-bonham@scc.net]

Originally Posted by Markxxx

They hate that. So you could instead of "bumping her" awake, once she falls asleep, pet her in the wrong direction.

And about the 3rd time, pull back a stump.

[Rachellelogram]

That's not a bad idea. I did have a cat once, though, that ENJOYED being petted the wrong way.

Weird! O_o

[Thudlow Boink]

I have had similar issues with cat(s) scratching/meowing at the closed bedroom door. My partially successful solutions have included
* throwing a shoe at the (closed) door
* putting something bulky in front of the door (outside the room) so the cat can't get at the door itself
* wearing earplugs to sleep

[Sailboat]

Isn't "cat behavior modification" a nonsense phrase?

[Asimovian]

Last night, she hung out with me in the bedroom for about two hours. A small amount of petting was involved, but mostly it was her just dozing in my general vicinity (as evidenced by the photo posted above).

Eventually, she got up and wandered out (distracted by Smoke having the audicity to roam the house unimpeded, I believe). I followed her out, turned out the lights, went back in the bedroom and closed the door. A short while later, I heard maybe two or three minutes of protest from the outside. But that was it. Nothing further. As far as I can tell, we all slept soundly.

Maybe she's just being random, but it may also be that she got her "quiet time" with me last night, or it may be that she's learning (she exhibited a couple of other learned behavior patterns last night -- after several days of shooing and scolding her for jumping on the table while I was eating dinner, she looked at me last night, but did not pursue my food). I hope it's not the quiet time, because my work schedule just doesn't allow me to spend that kind of time relaxing with her every day. But, we'll see.

[Ogre]

Originally Posted by rachelellogram

That's not a bad idea. I did have a cat once, though, that ENJOYED being petted the wrong way.

Weird! O_o

Bwuh?! Every cat I've ever owned LOVES this treatment, and I have 3 right now. Start with the backwards scratching along the spine, and before long all of them are vacant-eyed with bliss, purring like something's rattling around inside them, and making biscuits on whatever surface (usually my leg - ow!) happens to me handy.

[Scubaqueen]

Sounds like things are improving! Good news.

[Asimovian]

Well, maybe.

Last night, I kicked her out early because she kept trying to knock over a can of soda I was drinking. She protested for a long time later in the evening. But I never opened the door again, and she eventually was quiet for the night.

I will not surrender! (Probably!)

[Asimovian]

Just a quick update -- she seems to be responding now to the bedroom door being fully closed. She might whine for a minute or two, but I never hear anything else from her. I think I've gone five nights in a row without any real protesting.

Am I being successful, or is she quietly plotting my doom? Stay tuned!

[Cat Whisperer]

Why can't it be both?