How often do you single people get laid?

[drewbert]

Define it however the heck you want, it's been a very very long time.

[Misnomer]

Originally Posted by JRDelirious

B: "people who don't have sex on call" ?huh? Who has sex "on call"? 'xcuse me, but it happens if the other person is up to it, not "on call".

Geez, no wonder you've never gotten laid.

(I mostly kid!)

[Lok]

Originally Posted by Greathouse

We all have people that we can call in a clinch when we just need to get laid.

All right! Why didn't I get a number?!

In regards to the OP, if you are referring to one night stands/casual sex, never. If you mean sex in particular, just over 10 years now. And boy, am I glad to be reminded of that number.

Originally Posted by phouka

And now I live with friend who are neoconservative Republican Orthodox Christians. Not like I can bring a guy home on some random evening.

Assuming you and your roommate are sleeping in seperate bedrooms, why can't you bring a guy home? Your roommate may not care for it, but it is your life and you get to live it the way you want. That is the theory in this country anyway.

[Gundhilde]

Yeah, I was going to suggest to Phouka to just try being very, very quiet

As for me, I'm sort of a feast-or-famine type, as someone else mentioned earlier. I'll tend to go 4-6 months without really getting laid, and then for a month or two, it'll be a new person every weekend. Then another 4-6 month dry spell before another little slew of people shows up on the doorstep, so to speak.

I'm now un-eagerly anticipating what will probably be my longest dry spell yet, though I would be thrilled to be proven wrong! It started about three weeks ago and ends whenever the gods see fit to let penis and/or vagina ensue.

[Greathouse]

Originally Posted by JRDelirious

A: This restrictive definition of "getting laid" (=random-stranger casual sex) is most unusual.

Dude, lighten up. I'm just wondering how often poeple around here have meaningless one night stand type of sex.

Originally Posted by JRDelirious

B: "people who don't have sex on call" ?huh? Who has sex "on call"? 'xcuse me, but it happens if the other person is up to it, not "on call".

Again, lighten up.

Originally Posted by JRDelirious

C: By the OP definitions I've never "got laid" in 43 years of life, and neither have I seen myself as having "sex on call". Too many potential unintended consequences in the random-stranger hookup.

Thank you for answering my question.

Originally Posted by JRDelirious

And even when I've had situations where I got "friendly", "just-for-fun" no-strings boinking I would have never dreamt of looking at it as having someone "on call". Sounds disrespectful to me.

Tomato, Tomahto. If you want to find offense where none was intended then more power to ya. I hope it goes well for you.

[CalMeacham]

Yeah, I was going to suggest to Phouka to just try being very, very quiet

"Be vewy, vewy quiet! We're Scwewing wike wabbits!

Hehehehehehhhh!"

[Walloon]

About once a week when I was in college.

[MacGyverInSeattle]

I have been a lurker for many years now, reading and laughing on the message boards, but this thread has finally drawn me out.
I finally shelled out my membership fee and became official. So hi all.

I don’t drink or use drugs or party or do much non-geek type activities so my chance of meeting quick lay type females was nonexistent.
Then I discovered the sex clubs. The one I joined is well run and is a non-profit org specifically for quick sex and other similar activities (SAFE SEX ONLY).
Members do not have to use their real names and there are many beds in little rooms right in the building. You must wash the sheets after or bring your own!
No drink or drugs in the building, go outside to smoke, anyone who doesn’t believe no means no is banned.
They have pot luck parties and special events most nights of the week with occasional weekend getaways where we all chip in and rent a hotel or beach or park.
I am more into alternative activities so I joined a club catering to that type of thing.
I have since found lots of clubs like this on the internet with many like minded women whom I have met with very nice results.

So my answer to the OP is as often as I felt like going there, 1-2 times a week, time permitting.

[Greathouse]

Originally Posted by MacGyverInSeattle

I have been a lurker for many years now, reading and laughing on the message boards, but this thread has finally drawn me out.
I finally shelled out my membership fee and became official. So hi all.

Welcome.

Originally Posted by MIS

I don’t drink or use drugs or party or do much non-geek type activities so my chance of meeting quick lay type females was nonexistent.
Then I discovered the sex clubs. The one I joined is well run and is a non-profit org specifically for quick sex and other similar activities (SAFE SEX ONLY).
Members do not have to use their real names and there are many beds in little rooms right in the building. You must wash the sheets after or bring your own!
No drink or drugs in the building, go outside to smoke, anyone who doesn’t believe no means no is banned.
They have pot luck parties and special events most nights of the week with occasional weekend getaways where we all chip in and rent a hotel or beach or park.
I am more into alternative activities so I joined a club catering to that type of thing.
I have since found lots of clubs like this on the internet with many like minded women whom I have met with very nice results.

So my answer to the OP is as often as I felt like going there, 1-2 times a week, time permitting.

Interesting. Seriously.

[QuickSilver]

Originally Posted by MacGyverInSeattle

I have been a lurker for many years now, reading and laughing on the message boards, but this thread has finally drawn me out.
I finally shelled out my membership fee and became official. So hi all.

Welcome and... You've lurked for many years and this is the subject that got you to join and post?! Seriously?!?!

[Zebra]

I'm moving to Seattle. Today.

[MacGyverInSeattle]

Originally Posted by QuickSilver

Welcome and... You've lurked for many years and this is the subject that got you to join and post?! Seriously?!?!

Sex is a very serious issue to me. I haven't seen anything else on the SDMBs that I felt this strongly about. My interests include anything technological in any field, sex and not much else. The best is when I can combine the two. I know that is going to get some funny looks, best I not bring the details here.

[F. U. Shakespeare]

As far as complete-stranger situations, that happens to me two, maybe three times a year, tops. Usually it's when I'm traveling for work, or playing (I sing and play guitar part-time) in new venues.

In addition, I belong to a swing club, which I attend with several married women whose husbands are cool with it. I also have a couple of 'no strings' relationships with single women who live out of town. Basicaly, these women are people who, like me, are confirmed in our singlehood, but not interested in celibacy.

[AndrewL]

I find this thread very depressing.

When I was single, I got no sex at all.

Now that I'm married, I still get less sex than many of you single folks.

Sigh.

[pullin]

Originally Posted by Stark Raven Mad

Twice a month tops, before I was drawn into the dark seedy underworld of friends with benefits. One guy I know was averaging a lay every two nights before the exams came along.

Please tell me I read this wrong. The girls make you take a test now?

[DirkGntly]

When I was single - never.
Once I was engaged, about once a week.
After I was married, about 4x/week.
Currently - about 2x/week, but only 3x/month with my wife. (No, I'm not cheating! E-mail me if you want details but yes, fuck-buddies are a goooood thing...)

I have to relate that my most memorable experience recently was meeting a woman in another city and state, far away from home for both of us, and spending three days together. This is so memorable because she'd not had sex - not even masturbation - in five years. Trust me when I tell you, it's just like riding a bicycle.....and if she really was out-of-practice, then, Oh, Mama!, I'd have loved to have been around when she was still in top form!

[matt_mcl]

I had a major slut period in late 1999 to 2001 in which intervals ranged from every two weeks to every two days. Since then, it's been a major event when it happens.

[Misnomer]

Originally Posted by pullin

The girls make you take a test now?

How else can we tell whether the guy's going to be worth it?

[Ender_Will]

What about things that start as one nighters/hooking up but end up as fuck buddies? How does that factor into the count? Pre-FB sex counts, but not post-FB?

Anyways, in the 9 months between my last girlfriend (who was my first partner) and my current GF I was averaging about twice a month, but it would come in spurts (I made a funny!) so there was a dry spell of damn near three months.

[Stark Raven Mad]

Originally Posted by pullin

Please tell me I read this wrong. The girls make you take a test now?

There's even a Kaplan course for it.

[Aeschines]

Originally Posted by MacGyverInSeattle

Sex is a very serious issue to me. I haven't seen anything else on the SDMBs that I felt this strongly about. My interests include anything technological in any field, sex and not much else. The best is when I can combine the two. I know that is going to get some funny looks, best I not bring the details here.

Gay or straight, male or female? I have a hard time imagining a straight club that would work like that, but I've been wrong before.

[MacGyverInSeattle]

Originally Posted by Aeschines

Gay or straight, male or female? I have a hard time imagining a straight club that would work like that, but I've been wrong before.

I am Straight, very straight, but alternate lifestyles are supported at the club as well. They have women only and men only nights that I was very careful not to show up for.
The costume parties and dances are wild however and worth showing up for just to watch if nothing else.
I have been going steady for a couple of years now and haven't been there for over a year, but I have driven past a few nights and they appear to still be going strong, several hundred cars there most weekends.

[Aeschines]

Originally Posted by MacGyverInSeattle

I am Straight, very straight, but alternate lifestyles are supported at the club as well. They have women only and men only nights that I was very careful not to show up for.
The costume parties and dances are wild however and worth showing up for just to watch if nothing else.

Kewel. OK, help me out on this further point: We all know that more dudes go to bars than chicks. How do they prevent the club from filling up with sausage in search of easy puss? What's the system?

Thanks for more details. And please also tell about some of your more interesting lays there.

(I'm not taking the piss; I'm really interested! Thanks.)

[scr4]

Originally Posted by MacGyverInSeattle

Then I discovered the sex clubs. The one I joined is well run and is a non-profit org specifically for quick sex and other similar activities (SAFE SEX ONLY).

Hypothetically, if one were interested, how would one find a club that's reputable and safe? And are such clubs legal in all (or most) states?

[Walloon]

Originally Posted by Aeschines

I'm not taking the piss

[MacGyverInSeattle]

Originally Posted by Aeschines

Kewel. OK, help me out on this further point: We all know that more dudes go to bars than chicks. How do they prevent the club from filling up with sausage in search of easy puss? What's the system?

Thanks for more details. And please also tell about some of your more interesting lays there.

(I'm not taking the piss; I'm really interested! Thanks.)

On the straight nights I was there, more than half of the people there came as couples, I assume many of them were married and swinging. The rule about no really really means no, got a lot of people banned, almost all men that I could see, so that thined out the ranks considerably. even so there were a few more men than women, about 60-40. Never bothered me, I don't have any problems getting women intrested. If you want more details you will have to email me.

[MacGyverInSeattle]

Originally Posted by scr4

Hypothetically, if one were interested, how would one find a club that's reputable and safe? And are such clubs legal in all (or most) states?

I have no idea if they are legal in any state, they are mostly word of mouth, I was told about this one by a woman I met off an internet sex club. They keep a low profile and I have talked to the owner, She said it had to be non-profit or she would be shut down in a second.

[Indygrrl]

Maybe I'm more prudish than I thought. I had no trouble going out and hooking up, but the idea of a sex club really creeps me out. I guess it's because I rarely hooked up with a total stranger. It was always someone I at least knew socially.

I just have this skeevy mental picture of overweight middle-aged men with pattern baldness lecherously groping at every woman who walks by. (Old dancer nightmare, I guess. )

[MacGyverInSeattle]

Originally Posted by Indygrrl

Maybe I'm more prudish than I thought. I had no trouble going out and hooking up, but the idea of a sex club really creeps me out. I guess it's because I rarely hooked up with a total stranger. It was always someone I at least knew socially.

When I first heard of the clubs, I had plenty of trepidations, I had no idea how such a thing could work.
The first time you go, you have to go to an indoctrination for 2 hours, in which the owner/manager tells you the rules in no uncertain terms, many of the sausage types were there, but I never saw them again, too many rules or maybe they just showed up for the gay events? Then the next time you, or at least I, went, was to a non-adult activity picnic in a park and got to know people, talk with them for the day. There were quite a mix of people from all walks of life there. Young, old, geeky, punky, etc. we kind of sorted out by interests.
It wasn’t until my fourth or fifth visit that things got interesting.

[AndrewL]

I have heard of similar sex clubs here in New Jersey, but they all either ban single men outright, or charge them a steep entry fee. With what you said about a for-profit club being in danger of immediatly being shut down, I wonder how they get away with it.

I still suspect that a not-for-profit club must end up turning down the vast majority of the single men who apply. I'm also curious if the one you belong to has any requirements as far as proof of STD free status or mandatory safe sex rules.

[MacGyverInSeattle]

Originally Posted by AndrewL

I have heard of similar sex clubs here in New Jersey, but they all either ban single men outright, or charge them a steep entry fee. With what you said about a for-profit club being in danger of immediatly being shut down, I wonder how they get away with it.

I assume different citys / states have different rules. This club was not cheap. It was $300 yearly and $25 - $40 every event. You could donate mattresses, sheets, towels and washer and dryers and things as well to defray the cost. I did a lot of maintenance for them.

Originally Posted by AndrewL

I still suspect that a not-for-profit club must end up turning down the vast majority of the single men who apply. I'm also curious if the one you belong to has any requirements as far as proof of STD free status or mandatory safe sex rules.

If you read my original post (SAFE SEX ONLY). STD testing was up to the people, they had posted lists of places you could be tested and get cards. I am paranoid about bugs and stuck to VERY VERY SAFE SEX card or no.

[Unintentionally Blank]

Originally Posted by kimera

I also have very selective tastes in sexual partners which makes finding one a huge pain in the ass.

This tells me you're doing something wrong. {rimshot!}

Uh, no pun intended.

{slinks outta thread and sobs at the married sex ratio}

[kimera]

Originally Posted by Indygrrl

but why the complete list of partners? If my guy had asked me to get tested, I would have agreed with no problem. But if he wanted a list, I'd have to say that was none of his damn business.

I'd want to know how recently he/she's been sexually active and about how many total partners she's/he's had. I don't need names and phone numbers and all that stuff, just amount and dates. I can see how people might say it's none of my business, but I disagree. I regard sex as very personal, and with all the negative draw-backs it has, I would rather be extra safe and nosy than sorry. I would not be offended at all if a guy asked me the same question before sex.

[phouka]

Originally Posted by Lok

Assuming you and your roommate are sleeping in seperate bedrooms, why can't you bring a guy home? Your roommate may not care for it, but it is your life and you get to live it the way you want. That is the theory in this country anyway.

They (husband and wife) are my landlords, not my roommates. They've been kind enough to rent a bedroom to me and have waived rent a couple of times due to my not-having-a-job thing, so much as I would appreciate and revel in a very quiet yet very vigorous Beast-With-Two-Back festival, I'm not doing it under their roof. It's a respect/really don't want to get thrown out on my ear sort of thing.

[rutabaga22]

Let's see, 25 women between my 19th birthday and my 25th. Three of those were real relationships (the last one is my wife), so 22 women in about 36 months of being truly single works out to a little more than once every two months.

So call me a slut. It's still not that much sex. I would have had more fun with fewer partners and more times per partner.

[Pooty]

My "girl" roommate in college brought home a different guy every week. Sometimes 4 different guys a week, I couldnt beleive it! Thankfully, she never tried anything with me.. Kinda sad, I didn't get that experience in college guess she doesn't like girls.

[Wesley Clark]

This thread is depressing. I wish I had better social skills and options.

[Jragon]

Never. I'm not interested in casual sex. It'd be tempting to sleep with somebody I was interested in dating already, but if they made it clear they only wanted a casual encounter I'd have to turn it down because it's not really my thing.

Random hook-ups? Absolutely not. Not that I could if I wanted to anyway, I don't like alcohol (not a moral thing, I hate the feeling of being buzzed and the taste makes me gag) so I don't go to bars, and I've never been to a party and wouldn't know how to find one if I wanted to so...

[drachillix]

MMMM zombie sex!

Although amusingly enough I posted in this thread 7 years ago I was married then, but back in the mix again now...its similar, although far more FWB oriented lately. I have one go to FWB who is always willing... and a few others who I might cross paths with every 2-3 months. I rarely go 2-3 weeks. Still would rather have just one who was a full time workable relationship.

[drewtwo99]

That's an interesting thought, that "everyone has someone they can turn to for sex in a pinch so don't count that."

I wonder if I know anyone who would always be willing to have sex with me if I were single and willing. I would bet there are a couple.

But, it's not really my thing. When I am single, I am either dating and having sex with the intent to take things further and more seriously, or I am not doing anything at all (just enjoying being single).

I *have* done the random hook up thing but it was only online, never in a bar or anything like that.

[rhubarbarin]

Never, by your definition. I don't have casual sex, or friends with benefits. But I was in serious relationships all through my 20s, we'll see how things go now that I am 27, single and don't know anyone boyfriend-worthy. So far, the problem seems to be that I don't *want* to sleep with anyone.

[April R]

Zombie thread makes me feel better about my married sex life

[boytyperanma]

As a gay man, as often as I want. It's not hard to find horny guys on the internet. When I was in my slutty phase, 2-3 guys a week, mostly college boys that are bad at sex.

These days I don't bother with hook ups much anymore, I've had enough nsa sex, I'd much rather have the strings.

[panaccione]

Yeah, it seems like I go about 1-2 years and then hook up with somebody, and then it's back to the dry spell...

[Hilarity N. Suze]

I probably wondered this in 2005 and I wonder this now: At what point do you define yourself as single?

For me, it was equivalent to "not married." If I had a boyfriend--I was single. If I lived with someone--still single, although a little more committed. Actually it never meant I wasn't committed to the relationship. Just that the relationship was not "married."

[drewtwo99]

For legal purposes I am single. For all other purposes I live with and am committed romantically to another person, aka taken.

[Loach]

Originally Posted by Hilarity N. Suze

I probably wondered this in 2005 and I wonder this now: At what point do you define yourself as single?

For me, it was equivalent to "not married." If I had a boyfriend--I was single. If I lived with someone--still single, although a little more committed. Actually it never meant I wasn't committed to the relationship. Just that the relationship was not "married."

To me "in a relationship" means not single. To hell with what the IRS says.


The thread is so old I went from married to single to in a relationship. Maybe when it comes around again I'll be in a position to answer.

[CalMeacham]

Is it significant that this thread was resurrected the day before Valentinre's Day?



You want Zombie Sex/ Go see Warm Bodies

[msmith537]

I find it facinating that my recommendation for getting a Jersey Shore house for regular hookup booty sex predates the TV show by 4 years.

[hotflungwok]

No woman has looked at me twice in more than 10 years.

I've never had the chance to celebrate Valentine's Day. I've had relationships, but none of them lasted long enough to include this holiday.