Mysterious barrel of goat semen

[astro]

Scylla is behind all this this somehow...

Strange cargo found in forest

Stumped officials try to find out who dropped off 55 gallons of goat semen in Cook County preserve

[Dinsdale]

My favorite part of that story involver the "proper disposal."

Are there a lot of satisfied mama-to-be she-goats and sows in the S. burbs today?

[Why A Duck]

Damn, I though astro was bucking for the highest thread views to replies ratio prize.

[Finagle]

I think the article must be slightly inaccurate -- the only way to read this is a 55 gallon drum filled with dry ice and a much smaller canister of goat semen. Because even though goats are notoriously horny, I don't think anyone has the free time it would take to, um, acquire 55 gallons of goat sperm and then just toss it out.

[Sue Duhnym]

Truth is, indeed, stranger than fiction.

[c_goat]

Sorry, that was me. I was saving it in case my parts stopped working before I had kids. Now that I have kids I don't need it anymore.

[tiny ham]

I'm sorry, could you have that delivered to my apartment. We're doing that "Things Jarbaby Bathes In" photo shoot this weekend.

[Johnny L.A.]

Goat felching without the goat?

[rjung]

Isn't "mysterious barrel of goat semen" inherently redundant? Or are there mundane barrels of goat semen out there which I'm not aware of?

"What's that?"
"Eh, it's just another barrel of goat semen. Don't pay it no mind."

[elfkin477]

Originally posted by Dinsdale
Are there a lot of satisfied mama-to-be she-goats and sows in the S. burbs today?

What would the offspring of a pig and a goat be, anyway?

[racinchikki]

A poat. Or maybe a gig.

[clayton_e]

Dubya.

[Journeyman]

Why did I open this thread?

That must be the wierdest news story I've seen in some time.

[scr4]

The company ships pig and boar semen in canisters, which in turn are placed in large drums filled with liquid nitrogen. The liquid nitrogen keeps the semen at the optimal temperature so it can be shipped long distances and used for artificial insemination

So the title of the article is misleading; it may look like a 55-gallon drum on the outside, but probably a liquid nitrogen dewar with a few gallons of liquid nitrogen and a tiny test tube of semen.

Or are there mundane barrels of goat semen out there which I'm not aware of?

I'm sure there are - semen of farm animals are transported for artificial insemination all the time.

[Tranquilis]

Originally posted by Journeyman
Why did I open this thread?

According to best evidecnce, because yer a perv.

[Michael Ellis]

[BooBoo316]

Originally posted by Johnny L.A.
Goat felching without the goat?

Ain't modern science grand?

[Mac Guffin]

Hey, that's nuthin. I used to handle ten-gallon containers of HUMAN semen all the time.






Of course, I was a Clinic courier back then, and about 9.8 gallons of that was liquid itrogen, but.....


Never mind......

[Mac Guffin]

Nitrogen even.. sheesh.

[Infectious Lass]

For days now, I have seen the title of this thread and wondered what it could be about....I finally gave in and I just had to open it!!

And it is truly about a mysterious barrel of goat semen. Of course all the best barrels of goat semen are mysterious.

(that's what I have said every day upon seeing this title, oh it keeps me amused and off the streets I suppose )

[bouv]

Very weird indeed. My question is this:

Does the semen inside the barrel (which probably only contains a gallon or two of actual semen) come from one goat? Or multiple. One would think that getting that much from one goat would take a long time...but can you mix semen and still have it be effective? The things my mind ponders...

[Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor]

Mysterious barrel of goat semen

I gotta say it---Band Name!

[LindyHopper]

Originally posted by jarbabyj
I'm sorry, could you have that delivered to my apartment. We're doing that "Things Jarbaby Bathes In" photo shoot this weekend.

Eeewwwwww........

[BlueMit11]

I guess there's some kind of surplus of goat semen these days. I'm sure there are starving kids in Somolia who could use that to inseminate their family goat, then eat the young that it produces. The kind of people who waste incredibly valuable things like that make me sick...

[Wikkit]

Originally posted by BlueMit11
I guess there's some kind of surplus of goat semen these days. I'm sure there are starving kids in Somolia who could use that to inseminate their family goat, then eat the young that it produces. The kind of people who waste incredibly valuable things like that make me sick...

Any vegetarian would tell you that a pound of plant matter won't make a pound of animal meat when fed to an animal. So, you'd be better off eating the plants and the goat semen.

So, anyone want a salad with a lovely white Vinaigoatte?

[Tranquilis]

Eeeeeewwww...!

[Dr. Rieux]

What would the offspring of a pig and a goat be, anyway?

That would be Linda Tripp.

[heresiarch]

Aliens

Yep, the aliens need to breed spidergoats as a source of polymers to repair their spaceship.

[Shade]

Originally posted by Wikkit
Any vegetarian would tell you that a pound of plant matter won't make a pound of animal meat when fed to an animal. So, you'd be better off eating the plants and the goat semen.

So, anyone want a salad with a lovely white Vinaigoatte?

Normally, yes, but if you have grass, you need cows to digest it, and if you have tin cans, a 55-gallon of goat semen could just be god send.

Not literally.

[DocCathode]

Originally posted by jarbabyj
I'm sorry, could you have that delivered to my apartment. We're doing that "Things Jarbaby Bathes In" photo shoot this weekend.

Please tell me you're kidding.

Because if you are serious, the knowledge that you're bathing in goat juice and I'll never get to watch will cause me to spend the remainder of my life weeping

[Boyo Jim]

I WAS going to use it as special effects material for my newest musical porn spectacular, All That Jizz.

Not all is lost, fortunately the second barrel got through. We'll just have to recalibrate the pumps.