#1  
Old 11-09-2006, 08:11 AM
White and Nerdy is offline
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Eeek I'm a sock


O.K. I've tried to PM a mod but I "do not have access to this feature".

I'm ready to pay for membership but hated the name I chose for my guest membership approx. two years ago - consequently the above. oints at name:

a. Am I in trouble if I out myself?
  #2  
Old 11-09-2006, 08:32 AM
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I'm sure they'll work it out with you. I have hit the notify button and someone will come along and help you soon.
  #3  
Old 11-09-2006, 08:35 AM
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I'm not a mod but I suspect you need to send the administration an e-mail. This has happened before and they know what to do.

Also, the board does not have the PM function enabled.
  #4  
Old 11-09-2006, 08:48 AM
White and Nerdy is offline
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O.K. Thank you - I feel a bit better now.
  #5  
Old 11-09-2006, 09:02 AM
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Apparently we can't say this enough.

If you have an old screen name -- even if it's a name you don't like -- that' sthe name you need to stick with for at least a little while.

You can send an email to any administrator -- including me at TubaDiva@aol.com -- and we can change your old name to something you like better. And you can subscribe and life can be a dream, shboom.

So send me an email. Give me a list of a couple or three names you like ranked in the order you like them. (We have a lot of user names and once used they are not recycled; your first choice may be taken already.) I'll run down the list and change your user name. And you'll go subscribe.
  #6  
Old 11-09-2006, 08:52 PM
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To be honest this had me putting my credit card back in my wallet.

Quote:
Apparently we can't say this enough.
I suspect you will probably continue having to say it.

As a lurker I have never found ATMB very exciting thus have generally avoided it - as I suspect alot of lurkers may do. As a lurker I could not search and so did what I could do as soon as could do it regarding my stuff up of board etiquette. I have not, as a lurker, kept details of your email address prior to this and why on earth would I.

As someone about to pay for membership I came into this forum because I had goofed up and wanted to know how to fix it. I obviously had not opened a dual guest account in the intention of having another month for free and you can cancel it, as of right now if you wish.

Possibly you should have waited to close the sale before playing sneer at the noob.
  #7  
Old 11-09-2006, 10:11 PM
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Please don't judge all the mods and admins by this one and how she's treated you. Other than a handful of asshats and snarkaholics, most folks here are delighted to welcome new members and don't engage in newbie putdowns.

I for one believe we can always use more white and nerdy members.
  #8  
Old 11-09-2006, 10:22 PM
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Hi, I am also new!!!
  #9  
Old 11-09-2006, 10:26 PM
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That was appallingly rude, TubaDiva, and how are we ever going to attract new people with that kind of attitude?

Apologies, White and Nerdy.
  #10  
Old 11-09-2006, 11:31 PM
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What? Not meant to be rude.

We can't say that enough -- because obviously people don't know.

I told him -- nicely and politely too -- and I didn't yell at him for having two screen names which people are often banned for.

I told him how to solve his problem.

White and Nerdy, if you choose to be all insulted and stomp off, that is your business. But I have to admit I'm quite frustrated about this now. How the heck did you expect us to fix your problem, come out to your house in person?

And for those who choose to ascribe negative intent and motive where none was intended there's not much I can say to you; there's really nothing I can say if that's how you view my most innocuous statements. I shudder to think what might have happened if I had actually said something with any sting to it, Hell wouldn't hold it.
  #11  
Old 11-09-2006, 11:59 PM
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I'm with TD here. I didn't read that as meaning to be rude at all.

Though throughout this board there does seem to be a collective sense of sarcasm. All meant in the name of harmless humor and fun. But sometimes I do see how that leads to people misinterpreting the tone that people write with and sometimes this does lead to people blow up over small remarks.

But please White and Nerdy, continue to consider joining up. We still do have a lot of fun here. I hope to see you around.
  #12  
Old 11-10-2006, 12:01 AM
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Oh, and hi Mama_Hound too!
  #13  
Old 11-10-2006, 12:29 AM
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Good lord, TD -- do you have any idea at all how you come across? I've never myself had any problems with you, and you must know I'm not given to admin-bashing, so take this as an honest perception, not a snarky attack: both of your posts in this thread have bristled with dismissive impatience at yet another clueless bonehead pestering you for some stupid thing. There's more than a whiff of "Oh, fer chrissakes, what the hell is wrong with you?"
  #14  
Old 11-10-2006, 05:13 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bigbabysweets2000
I'm with TD here. I didn't read that as meaning to be rude at all.
Neither did I. Had there been a rolleyes or something, it might have been different, but I read it as simply meaning "clearly this bears repeating' in a purely incidental manner.

I honestly did not perceive any sneering at all.
  #15  
Old 11-10-2006, 05:18 AM
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Count another TD supporter. She wasn't snarky in any manner - just statin' the facts, ma'am.

Believe me - if you want to see snarky TD - you'll have to do a little search, but it's there and in all her glory. We're all really good snarks when need be.

Tuba - they're being too sensitive, not a strong trait for a beginner here! Don't trip! And it's not said enough, newbies or people interested in signing up NEED to read ATMB to avoid situations just like this.
  #16  
Old 11-10-2006, 07:07 AM
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Jesus. This:
"Apparently we can't say this enough."
could easily be perceived as off-putting and rude. Why can't we say it enough? Apparently because of some deficiency on the part of the noob. Otherwise why mention it at all?

I don't think Tuba meant it to sound rude, and clearly it doesn't ring as rude to a number of other posters, but I can certainly see how it's perceived as such.

But, of course, following it up with:
"White and Nerdy, if you choose to be all insulted and stomp off, that is your business. But I have to admit I'm quite frustrated about this now. How the heck did you expect us to fix your problem, come out to your house in person? "
was completely uncalled-for. White and Nerdy asked for help fixing a problem, and received (to him at least) a rude reply. He sure as fuck wasn't asking anyone to come out to his house and fix anything, he was objecting to being condescended to.

Would it really kill you, Tuba, just to say, "Whoops, I didn't intend any rudeness. Sorry." and leave it at that?
  #17  
Old 11-10-2006, 07:24 AM
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Boy isn't everyone sensitive today.
Or, at least, sensitive to Tuba's tones.
Lighten up.
  #18  
Old 11-10-2006, 08:20 AM
C K Dexter Haven is offline
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May I remind you of the sequence in The Hobbit where Gandalf comments on all the different meanings that can be attributed to a simple "Good morning!" from a friendly welcome to a curt dismissal? The problem with internet communication (whether email or message board) is that one cannot read tone or body language, see a smile or a frown. There are lots of ways of interpreting almost anything online, depending on the tone one reads into it... which is not always the tone that was intended.

TubaDiva did not mean anything insulting in a remark that lets folks know that we've said this before, and will doubtless say it again. It's in the FAQ - Rules for Posting, see Post #15 in that thread. It's in the Registration Agreement :
Quote:
Users who register under a different name for an additional guest membership after their first has expired will have their posting privileges revoked.
She's handled dozens of such situations, where people have got double names for innocent reasons. She'd be happy to handle this one to a happy resolution for all concerned.

We don't penalize people where the error was inadvertent and well-intended. But, at the same time, we deal with a few people who deliberately and maliciously do violate this rule.

So, White and Nerdy, please re-read TubaDiva's post, ascribing a friendly and helpful tone? I assure you, no insult was intended, and she's quite dismayed over the completely unexpected turn this has taken. (She's headed out of town for the weekend and was unable to post herself.)
  #19  
Old 11-10-2006, 08:31 AM
Mr.  Slant is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by White and Nerdy
To be honest this had me putting my credit card back in my wallet.
SNIP
If you're going to be this sensitive, don't register and go away.
You won't have any fun.
You must always assume the best about other posters, not the worst. If you assume everyone is trying to abuse you, you'll have a lot less fun.
  #20  
Old 11-10-2006, 09:40 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Slant
You must always assume the best about other posters, not the worst. If you assume everyone is trying to abuse you, you'll have a lot less fun.
Except me. Assume the worst, and you'll probably still be underestimating my intent.
  #21  
Old 11-10-2006, 10:05 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by D_Odds
Except me. Assume the worst, and you'll probably still be underestimating my intent.
Well, that tears it, sir! I demand satisfaction!
  #22  
Old 11-10-2006, 10:06 AM
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Well, Contra,...

Oops, wrong forum. Can we reschedule to Wednesday the 22nd in the Pit?
  #23  
Old 11-10-2006, 10:36 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by D_Odds
Well, Contra,...

Oops, wrong forum. Can we reschedule to Wednesday the 22nd in the Pit?
Oh, sure, hog all the prime spots, willya?

  #24  
Old 11-10-2006, 10:58 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Slant
If you're going to be this sensitive, don't register and go away.
You won't have any fun.
Jeez, I thought this thread was bad enough until I read this note. IT's really a 2000+ post club here isn't it?
  #25  
Old 11-10-2006, 11:03 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iamonfire
IT's really a 2000+ post club here isn't it?
No. You don't get away with the really strong abuse until you pass 10K.
  #26  
Old 11-10-2006, 11:13 AM
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What's this now? Someone thinks Tuba is coming across as rude and condescending? Well that's certainly a first. /sarcasm
  #27  
Old 11-10-2006, 11:19 AM
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So is Tuba sit in an ivory tower dictating things to underlings? Or is that a general thing. Just need to check before I think about parting with cold hard cash for a forum that has no avatars, PM's or in fact anything of note apart from some clever and erudite posters.
  #28  
Old 11-10-2006, 11:29 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iamonfire
So is Tuba sit in an ivory tower dictating things to underlings? Or is that a general thing. Just need to check before I think about parting with cold hard cash for a forum that has no avatars, PM's or in fact anything of note apart from some clever and erudite posters.
Oh, there's plenty of PMS here, and --- oh. Sorry.

What're PMs? Prime Ministers?
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  #29  
Old 11-10-2006, 11:29 AM
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:: wanders away shaking my head. :::
  #30  
Old 11-10-2006, 11:31 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Daithi Lacha
Oh, there's plenty of PMS here, and --- oh. Sorry.

What're PMs? Prime Ministers?
Private messages -- allowed between posters on many other message boards.

But I suppose there could be some prime ministers here, too.
  #31  
Old 11-10-2006, 11:33 AM
Daithi Lacha is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Giles
Private messages -- allowed between posters on many other message boards.

But I suppose there could be some prime ministers here, too.
Hi ho! Every day's a school day -- thanks, Giles!
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  #32  
Old 11-10-2006, 11:40 AM
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There is so much sarcasm, and snarkiness on this board, and granted, yes a lot of it shoots between members, and is often based on some level of familiarity. For some reason however, when a Mod does it, whether to a guest or a member with a question, even if it's not INTENDED as sarcastic, or even read as sarcastic by a fair number of people - well that's unacceptable.



MBG - Another one that didn't see the Grand Insult here.
  #33  
Old 11-10-2006, 11:54 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EddyTeddyFreddy
Oh, sure, hog all the prime spots, willya?

First served, first come, baby.
  #34  
Old 11-10-2006, 12:09 PM
Iamonfire is offline
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So is this a forum run by Nazi's or not?

There seems to be a lot of people avoiding the question. I sense some tension
  #35  
Old 11-10-2006, 12:40 PM
Daithi Lacha is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iamonfire
So is this a forum run by Nazi's or not?

There seems to be a lot of people avoiding the question. I sense some tension
Well, there's Gaudere's Law in full evidence. Iamonfire, try not to be so devisive in your questions, and maybe you'll get a more meaningful answer. Or better yet, make your own answer -- use your 30-day trial to see if this is a place where you'd like to belong. If it's not, you didn't have to part with your cash. Otherwise, you'll find like most everyone here that it was a good investement, snide remarks, rude responses, bruised feelings, poor communication and God-awful grammar aside.
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  #36  
Old 11-10-2006, 12:40 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iamonfire
So is this a forum run by Nazi's or not?

There seems to be a lot of people avoiding the question. I sense some tension
No, the forum is not run by Nazis (either in a literal or a metaphorical sense).

Yes, there is some tension: there's tension in any social situation, but especially on the Internet, where children (who may have matured physically, but haven't matured in other ways) troll around, hidden behind the screens of their computers. And the mods ban people like that very fast when they find them.

In addition, there are significant social differences here. Some people come from cultures where you make jokes about other people in a friendly way, and others come from cultures that misunderstand that joking as rude and unfriendly. Some of the mods come across as being more friendly than others -- and TubaDiva is one of the others here, perhaps because she is sometimes frustrated by the idiocy of some posters.

But because this place is well moderated, you don't get the flame wars that you find on many other boards. And those that stick around either like or tolerate that level of moderation, partly because it leads to a high signal-to-noise ratio around here.
  #37  
Old 11-10-2006, 12:48 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iamonfire
So is this a forum run by Nazi's or not?
Surely you are aware, being in this very thread, of the real dangers of people reading hostility when you meant harmlessless, or humor. Why perpetrate it yourself?
  #38  
Old 11-10-2006, 01:22 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fish
Surely you are aware, being in this very thread, of the real dangers of people reading hostility when you meant harmlessless, or humor. Why perpetrate it yourself?
Well, possibly because that is why Iamonfire has come to the SDMB?
  #39  
Old 11-10-2006, 02:35 PM
White and Nerdy is offline
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This is all getting a little ridiculous.

I have not huffed off in a fit of fury or sworn vegeance. I have put a credit card back in a wallet and said no thanks, after actually using the guest feature of this site and experiencing the site for myself.

You can search my last screen name - One Time Only - and find I did not a troll nor did I actually use the guest account as intended because I got busy the day I decided to sign up.

Lurking for four years I have read but not, I admit carved onto my heart, all the rules of the Straight Dope. Given the warnings and pittings I have seen over the years even those with membership and posting in this thread have fudged this one over the years.

I did what I could to rectify the situation once I was actually in a position to do something about it guest account in one hand credit card in another, toes typing 'Shit what a auspicious start.'

I was less than impressed with the percieved tone of the response and made a decision as a consumer.

No harm, no foul.

Except for refering to me as a male. Knock it off now.

I suspect some of resposes in this thread have been of the "look at me" variety and a place for people to continue old issues that have nothing to do with this instance.

Yes I am familiar with some of the shit surrounding Tuba Diva over the years and really do not want to be a part of it, other in the yay or nay category.
  #40  
Old 11-10-2006, 02:37 PM
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either, damn it.

And no I don't do paragraphs well in a little Quick Reply box.
  #41  
Old 11-10-2006, 03:02 PM
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OK, both posts sounded a little snotty to me. But as far as who we should be humoring here - it's not the person paying $15/yr. It's Tuba who's doing admin work for free, and has been for years. She's definitely human, but there's no amount you could pay me to put up with the shit piled on her for her mistakes. She's like the guy in Office Space - except instead of 5 bosses, she has 1500 bosses scrutinizing her work. And half of them are complete dicks.
  #42  
Old 11-10-2006, 03:26 PM
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What is everybody arguing about? I've just joined this place today after reading some of it for the past couple of weeks and it seems nice enough to me.

My rule of thumb is: if you go into a message board looking for a fight, you're going to find it. On the other hand, if you assume that the other people are trying to be nice, and you respond in kind, then 90% of the time they'll be nice to you back.

My ex always walked around with a chip on his shoulder and got into a lot of arguments. I would talk to the same people and get along with them fine. It all depends on your attitude.

-------------
The loving are the daring. Dare to love and be loved!
  #43  
Old 11-10-2006, 04:03 PM
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Quote:
It all depends on your attitude.
Says you!
  #44  
Old 11-10-2006, 04:17 PM
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Well, crap. Another fabulous username wasted and doomed to obscurity.

Anyhow, speaking as a former paying member - I thought it was worth it. Message boards with an intelligent and witty userbase are not so easily found. If it's not for you, fair enough.
  #45  
Old 11-10-2006, 05:08 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Becky G, Supervixen!
What is everybody arguing about? I've just joined this place today after reading some of it for the past couple of weeks and it seems nice enough to me.
You can't be looking hard enough; surely there's something you can misinterpret and take offence at? C'mon!
  #46  
Old 11-10-2006, 06:22 PM
Becky G, Supervixen! is offline
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You guys are so funny!
  #47  
Old 11-10-2006, 07:09 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by uglybeech
OK, both posts sounded a little snotty to me. But as far as who we should be humoring here - it's not the person paying $15/yr. It's Tuba who's doing admin work for free, and has been for years.
Tuba is a paid Admin and has been for years actually. In fairness she does only get what has been reported as a small stipend but she is paid nevertheless.

Since I am here I will say that I have not been a very big fan of TubaDiva over the years and even I didn't see any malice in her comments in this thread.
  #48  
Old 11-10-2006, 07:27 PM
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Mod Note:


I believe the original question/concern in the OP has been answered. This thread, however, careened a little bit off-road since then. Please remember that this is the forum for technical questions and concerns about the SDMB. (Plus, of course, practice posts.) If you'd like to comment on a mod/admin's official ruling/post, please do so in the Pit.
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