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Old 04-18-2019, 10:00 AM
CalMeacham's Avatar
CalMeacham is offline
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Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 43,706
Originally Posted by koeeoaddi View Post
Another 'I can't stand Benny Hill, but I loved this bit' post.

They Thought It Couldn't Be Done

[Just Benny at a podium reciting a long glurgy inspirational poem ending with...]

They thought that it could not be done,
Some even said they knew it,
But he faced up to what could not be done...

And he couldn't bloody do it!
I realize that I'm writing in response to a zombie, but it needs to be pointed out that:

1.) Richard Haydn did it earlier, playing poet Edwin Carp in the episode "The Return of Edwin Carp" on The Dick van Dyke Show first broadcast April 1, 1964 (April Fool's Day, appropriately). He called the poem "Perseverance", and I lacked the "bloody" in the last line.


Somebody said it couldn't be done,
But he with a chuckle replied,
"Maybe it couldn't, but I will be one,
Who'll never say 'No!' 'til I've tried."

So he buckled right in,
With a trace of a grin
On his face, if he worried he hid it.
And he tackled the thing that couldn't be done,

And he couldn't do it.

Both Haydn's and Hill's poems are parodies of the inspirational poem "It Couldn't be Done" by Edgar Albert Guest

Somebody said that it couldn’t be done

But he with a chuckle replied

That “maybe it couldn’t,” but he would be one

Who wouldn’t say so till he’d tried.

So he buckled right in with the trace of a grin

On his face. If he worried he hid it.

He started to sing as he tackled the thing

That couldn’t be done, and he did it!

Somebody scoffed: “Oh, you’ll never do that;

At least no one ever has done it;”

But he took off his coat and he took off his hat

And the first thing we knew he’d begun it.

With a lift of his chin and a bit of a grin,

Without any doubting or quiddit,

He started to sing as he tackled the thing

That couldn’t be done, and he did it.

There are thousands to tell you it cannot be done,

There are thousands to prophesy failure,

There are thousands to point out to you one by one,

The dangers that wait to assail you.

But just buckle in with a bit of a grin,

Just take off your coat and go to it;

Just start in to sing as you tackle the thing

That “cannot be done,” and you’ll do it.
"Blue, Navy Blue, he's as blue as he can be;
'Cause my steady boy said "Avatar!" and joined the Na'avi."
Old 04-18-2019, 01:22 PM
terentii's Avatar
terentii is offline
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Location: Moscow/Toronto
Posts: 17,198
Originally Posted by CalMeacham View Post
Both Haydn's and Hill's poems are parodies of the inspirational poem "It Couldn't be Done" by Edgar Albert Guest
MAD Magazine did an article along these lines called "Twisted MAD Tales for Twisted MAD Readers." Each inspirational short story featured a trope like "The Homebuilt Racer," "The Genie in the Bottle," and "The Gambler's Last Quarter." None ended the way you'd expect.
Is it true the two greatest problems facing us today are Ignorance and Apathy?
Old 04-18-2019, 02:33 PM
Knowed Out's Avatar
Knowed Out is offline
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Originally Posted by Skywatcher View Post
This episode list says Benny played Ironside twice. Neither segment features the bit you mention so I don't know what you saw unless it was part of the Grand Wheelchair Rally.
Granted, it's been about 35 years since I saw it, so it could have been another show, or completely imaginary.
Old 04-18-2019, 04:11 PM
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Location: Not the PNW :-(
Posts: 18,816
Any of the bits with Diana Darvey. Of those, I remember Beach of Waikiki best. They were both cracking up.

The moments where he got out of his ancient music hall mode were few and far between.
Old 04-19-2019, 11:58 PM
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Location: Montreal, QC
Posts: 58,578
One of the more understated bits I recall was Benny as a French film director ("Claude Le Twit") being interviewed and the host kept asking about all the artistic elements in his latest film, each of which turned out to have a banal explanation, i.e. the film suddenly shifts from color to black-and-white because, it turned out, they just ran out of color film. Some scenes are shot with a hand-held camera because... the tripod was broken. And the lead actress, otherwise perfectly beautiful and flawless, was directed to play her character with a lisp:

Benny: Non, non, you misunderstand. I don't give 'er a leesp. The actress who play the part, she have always leesp.

Host: You searched all France for an actress with a lisp?

Benny: Non, non, I don't find her, she was discovered by our producer. Who was living with 'er at the time.

And Jane Leeves showed up occasionally, I hear.
Don't worry about the end of Inception. We have top men working on it right now. Top. Men.
Old 04-20-2019, 12:31 AM
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Leaffan is offline
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Ottawa
Posts: 24,155
You know, Benny Hill is quite lowbrow.

And that's exactly why I love the show!


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