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  #51  
Old 02-06-2017, 02:21 PM
Hypno-Toad Hypno-Toad is offline
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The first time you realized that the world could be an ugly place
Bathroom signs
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This is my signature. There are many like it, but this one is mine.
  #52  
Old 02-06-2017, 06:42 PM
Malleus, Incus, Stapes! Malleus, Incus, Stapes! is offline
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Poll: For what crime(s) would you turn in a loved one?

Hypothetical Question, RE: Mexico Invasion
  #53  
Old 02-07-2017, 07:55 AM
CalMeacham CalMeacham is offline
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Der Spiegel declares war on Trump

"Leave Donald Alone!" Pleads His Press Secretary

Is Donald Trump really THAT bad?
  #54  
Old 02-07-2017, 12:51 PM
teela brown teela brown is offline
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You are now a godlike entity. How do you present yourself?
Tinkerbell
  #55  
Old 02-07-2017, 12:51 PM
CalMeacham CalMeacham is offline
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You are now a godlike entity, how do you choose to present yourself to people?

Tinkerbell





All you need to be saved is to Believe ... and a little Pixie Dust!
  #56  
Old 02-07-2017, 12:52 PM
CalMeacham CalMeacham is offline
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The first time you realized that the world could be an ugly place

I Helped Put a Dog on Death Row. It Was Necessary but Makes Me Really Sad. (Long. Sorry.)

  #57  
Old 02-07-2017, 02:13 PM
CalMeacham CalMeacham is offline
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Gender Identity and Regarding Matters Psychiatric

Zap! You're an invisible pink unicorn!
  #58  
Old 02-07-2017, 10:28 PM
Jackmannii Jackmannii is offline
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Queen Elizabeth II celebrates 65 years on the throne.
Does anyone remember the Penismobile?


Now that was one hell of a coronation.
  #59  
Old 02-08-2017, 01:14 AM
Northern Piper Northern Piper is offline
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Frost on my Bedroom window at 31 below (Celsius)

Flames Just Started Shooting Out of the Back of My Microwave

Song of Ice and Fire indeed!
  #60  
Old 02-08-2017, 02:03 AM
buddha_david buddha_david is offline
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Flames Just Started Shooting Out of the Back of My Microwave
A hidden drawback of smart home devices


I'll say...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Northern Piper View Post
Frost on my Bedroom window at 31 below (Celsius)

Flames Just Started Shooting Out of the Back of My Microwave

Song of Ice and Fire indeed!
Problem? Solution!
  #61  
Old 02-08-2017, 11:01 AM
Ludovic Ludovic is offline
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Presidential abuse of power
Ignoring "Invalid" Injunctions
  #62  
Old 02-08-2017, 10:20 PM
jtur88 jtur88 is offline
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Travelling to Trump's America in August

And my budgie flock doubles in size!
  #63  
Old 02-09-2017, 08:55 AM
Jackmannii Jackmannii is offline
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Clothes Dryer Problem
can you tear off someone else's arm (by hand)?


Never buy used appliances from Stephen King.
  #64  
Old 02-09-2017, 02:31 PM
MEBuckner MEBuckner is offline
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A hidden drawback of smart home devices
Work follows you around wherever you go


:yawn: "Microwave: Tea, Earl Grey, hot."
"Tea, Earl Grey, hot. Your boss wants to know if you have finished the weekly TPS report."
"Dammit!"
  #65  
Old 02-09-2017, 09:53 PM
El_Kabong El_Kabong is offline
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When Employers Search Resumes...
You time travel to High School


Is this, like, a Star Trek plot or something?

Last edited by El_Kabong; 02-09-2017 at 09:54 PM.
  #66  
Old 02-10-2017, 08:55 AM
CalMeacham CalMeacham is offline
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Things that are basically impossible

Adoption! (maybe?)
  #67  
Old 02-10-2017, 11:33 AM
CalMeacham CalMeacham is offline
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Things that are basically impossible

My house is beeping.
  #68  
Old 02-10-2017, 12:12 PM
Jackmannii Jackmannii is offline
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The first time you realized that the world could be an ugly place
Travelling to Trump's America in August


Oh, those sheltered Brits.
  #69  
Old 02-10-2017, 01:58 PM
CalMeacham CalMeacham is offline
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Things that are basically impossible

I've lost 20lbs in a week



Lotta mileage in that "basically impossible" thread title
  #70  
Old 02-10-2017, 02:23 PM
Malleus, Incus, Stapes! Malleus, Incus, Stapes! is offline
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NSA Contractor Arrested for Espionage

Bad day at the office
  #71  
Old 02-10-2017, 03:41 PM
Karen Lingel Karen Lingel is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by El_Kabong View Post
When Employers Search Resumes...
You time travel to High School
This is similar to a recurring nightmare I have...
  #72  
Old 02-10-2017, 11:04 PM
MEBuckner MEBuckner is offline
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Third Grade Math question
can you tear off someone else's arm (by hand)?


This New Math is fuckin' hardcore, man.
  #73  
Old 02-10-2017, 11:27 PM
El_Kabong El_Kabong is offline
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Has Microsoft reopened free upgrades to Windows 10?
Crows: Best Way To Attract Them?


Sorry, but it's well known that most crows are Mac users.
  #74  
Old 02-11-2017, 02:37 PM
Catamount Catamount is offline
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I took a dna test, here are some of the results
All Time Best Hugo Award Winner
  #75  
Old 02-11-2017, 03:11 PM
Ludovic Ludovic is offline
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People Who Think Zoos should be Eliminated, Let Me Ask You This Question.
Why do people take cruise ship vacations over and over again?


It's just like they're in a zoo!
  #76  
Old 02-11-2017, 03:18 PM
Ludovic Ludovic is offline
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I don't like Islam
Do you like The Beach?
  #77  
Old 02-11-2017, 04:42 PM
MEBuckner MEBuckner is offline
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What would a golden lion have sounded like?
Most recent common ancestor of all living birds


"OK, what would the most recent common ancestor of all living birds have sounded like?"
"A golden lion."
  #78  
Old 02-11-2017, 10:52 PM
kunilou kunilou is offline
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To Melania: An Open Letter
Hippy Young Dolphins Using Blowfish to get High


What exactly do you expect Melania to do about it?
  #79  
Old 02-12-2017, 07:23 PM
Ludovic Ludovic is offline
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Crows: Best Way To Attract Them?
squash bugs
  #80  
Old 02-12-2017, 07:54 PM
CalMeacham CalMeacham is offline
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What's a simple easy-to-use-and-update fitness indicator

can you tear off someone else's arm (by hand)?



Hmmm -- I didn't tear off your arm. I must not be as fit.
  #81  
Old 02-13-2017, 09:20 AM
Annie-Xmas Annie-Xmas is offline
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Things that are basically impossible
2017 Diet and Fitness Thread


I agree
  #82  
Old 02-13-2017, 09:28 AM
El_Kabong El_Kabong is offline
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Things that are weirdly satisfying...
Trump's inauguration poster has glaring goof.
  #83  
Old 02-13-2017, 10:01 AM
Annie-Xmas Annie-Xmas is offline
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Cafe Society Confessions: What's yours?
Pretentious cocktails


Asked and answered
  #84  
Old 02-13-2017, 05:54 PM
MEBuckner MEBuckner is offline
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Thinking of Immigrating to New Zealand
I'll go to hell if I want to go to hell!


Actually, New Zealand is quite nice.
  #85  
Old 02-14-2017, 03:50 PM
Jackmannii Jackmannii is offline
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Please walk me through outpatient surgery
I'll go to hell if I want to go to hell!


That's #1 on the list of Things Not To Say To The Anesthesiologist.
  #86  
Old 02-14-2017, 04:57 PM
Annie-Xmas Annie-Xmas is offline
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What would it take for you to like President Trump?
Thinking of Immigrating to New Zealand


Nope, not even then.

The downside of coming from a wealthy family.
People Who Don't Know What A Billion Is


I know what a billion is. Let me get my checkbook.

Last edited by Annie-Xmas; 02-14-2017 at 04:58 PM.
  #87  
Old 02-14-2017, 05:03 PM
Annie-Xmas Annie-Xmas is offline
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How will you spend the evening of Valentine's Day?
Thinking of Immigrating to New Zealand



How romantic

Last edited by Annie-Xmas; 02-14-2017 at 05:04 PM.
  #88  
Old 02-15-2017, 08:04 AM
CalMeacham CalMeacham is offline
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Things that are basically impossible

interesting engineering





Some Humanities major wrote that.
  #89  
Old 02-15-2017, 12:28 PM
CalMeacham CalMeacham is offline
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So um, this is not going well so far

Trump Administration: A Clusterfuck in the Making

Butt-Hurt Trump Takes to Twitter Again
  #90  
Old 02-15-2017, 12:46 PM
CalMeacham CalMeacham is offline
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Separated by one:

What Discontinued Casual Dining Item Would You Bring Back?


Forgotten luncheon meats and types of salami
  #91  
Old 02-15-2017, 12:56 PM
ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness is offline
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How will you spend the evening of Valentine's Day?
Trauma induced gout flare up
  #92  
Old 02-15-2017, 04:04 PM
Jackmannii Jackmannii is offline
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Odd but true - my satellite-synced clock radio is always 10 minutes slow
Do you wear a wrist watch?


Yeah. I liked the music, but it was hard to find sleeves that fit.
  #93  
Old 02-15-2017, 04:28 PM
Ludovic Ludovic is offline
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A question about global warming
Where's the D.C. snow? feb 15

Last edited by Ludovic; 02-15-2017 at 04:28 PM.
  #94  
Old 02-15-2017, 04:43 PM
Jackmannii Jackmannii is offline
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The downside of coming from a wealthy family.
Things that are basically impossible
  #95  
Old 02-15-2017, 06:54 PM
Malleus, Incus, Stapes! Malleus, Incus, Stapes! is offline
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Rumors--Trump Hates The Job/Fed Up/Thinking Of Quitting

"Top Writer" of Fortune Cookies is Quitting


Hooray! Though I personally think "fortune cookie" is too kind a description of his speaking style.

(Even funnier, the actual fortune cookie guy's first name is Donald).
  #96  
Old 02-16-2017, 02:06 AM
Ludovic Ludovic is offline
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Things that are basically impossible
Counterfeiting currency.
  #97  
Old 02-16-2017, 10:11 AM
Annie-Xmas Annie-Xmas is offline
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Anybody have New Year's Resolutions that They are Still Keeping?
Kim Jong-nam Murdered


THAT was your New Year's Resolution?
  #98  
Old 02-16-2017, 11:12 AM
Catamount Catamount is offline
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How dare the Grammys not give Beyonce every award!
Butt-Hurt Trump Takes to Twitter Again


Dude. Put the phone down already.
  #99  
Old 02-16-2017, 02:54 PM
Karen Lingel Karen Lingel is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Malleus, Incus, Stapes! View Post
Rumors--Trump Hates The Job/Fed Up/Thinking Of Quitting

"Top Writer" of Fortune Cookies is Quitting
LOL, I'd bet there'd be a market for Trump-like fortune cookies: "Weather may be rainy. Sad!"
  #100  
Old 02-16-2017, 03:11 PM
Karen Lingel Karen Lingel is offline
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Oh, I got my wish in this thread:

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/...d.php?t=819252
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