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  #451  
Old 06-13-2017, 10:31 AM
Elendil's Heir Elendil's Heir is offline
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Howard: Grab a napkin, homey, you just got served.
Leonard: That's fine, you win.
Howard: What's his problem?
Sheldon: His imaginary girlfriend broke up with him.
Howard: Been there!
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  #452  
Old 06-13-2017, 05:12 PM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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On a ship? Aren’t they afraid Hawking will just roll overboard?
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  #453  
Old 06-13-2017, 06:40 PM
RivkahChaya RivkahChaya is offline
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Leonard (takes off glasses): You are beautiful, you know that? You pop, sparkle and buzz ee-LEC-tric. I'm gonna pick you up at eight. Show you a night you will never forget.

FBI Agent: Sounds great.

Leonard: Really?
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  #454  
Old 06-13-2017, 09:18 PM
Elendil's Heir Elendil's Heir is offline
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Sheldon: I couldn't sleep knowing that just outside my bedroom is our living room and just outside our living room is that hallway and immediately adjacent to that hallway is this!
Leonard: Do you realize if Penny wakes up there's no reasonable explanation to why we are here?
Sheldon: I just gave you a reasonable explanation.
Leonard: No, no. You gave me an explanation. Its reasonableness will be determined by a jury of your peers.
Sheldon: Don't be silly. I have no peers.
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  #455  
Old 06-13-2017, 10:55 PM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Back to the Future 2 was in the Back to the Future 3-case, and Back to the Future 3 was, get this, in the Back to the Future 2-case.
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  #456  
Old 06-15-2017, 12:36 PM
Elendil's Heir Elendil's Heir is offline
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Raj: Dad, I'm trying to tell you off, and you're ruining it with your delight and relief!
Raj's Dad: Sorry. Oh, no, my grown son is going to stop spending all my money. Where did I fail as a father?

One of my all-time favorite BBT bits.
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  #457  
Old 06-15-2017, 06:47 PM
RivkahChaya RivkahChaya is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Elendil's Heir View Post
Raj: Dad, I'm trying to tell you off, and you're ruining it with your delight and relief!
Raj's Dad: Sorry. Oh, no, my grown son is going to stop spending all my money. Where did I fail as a father?

One of my all-time favorite BBT bits.
My all-time favorite is the one where Amy pretends to share Sheldon's pain over not being able to decide what video system to buy. I swear, that is up there with "I thought turkeys could fly!"
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  #458  
Old 06-15-2017, 09:22 PM
Elendil's Heir Elendil's Heir is offline
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Post it!
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  #459  
Old 06-16-2017, 05:14 AM
Brooky Brooky is offline
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I described your love making as aloof yet effective

I wish you wouldn't have done that! It's gonna make me a "chick magnet" & I'm busy enough as it is~
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  #460  
Old 06-16-2017, 08:49 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Penny: You’re an emotionless robot.

Sheldon: Well, I try.

Last edited by panache45; 06-16-2017 at 08:49 AM..
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  #461  
Old 06-16-2017, 10:22 AM
Elendil's Heir Elendil's Heir is offline
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Leonard: We don't need strength. We're physicists. We are the intellectual descendants of Archimedes. Give me a fulcrum and a lever, and I can move the Earth. (Trying to move the box) It's just a matter of... I don't have this. I don't have this. I don't have it!
Sheldon: Archimedes would be so proud.
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  #462  
Old 06-17-2017, 06:56 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Why would anybody claim to be from New Jersey, if they weren't?
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  #463  
Old 06-19-2017, 04:40 PM
Brooky Brooky is offline
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Take a picture of us together, make it good enough to go on mugs, calenders & posters!
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  #464  
Old 06-19-2017, 04:52 PM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Penny: You don’t think I’m smart enough. You just think I’m going to be a liability. Even though I totally just used "liability" correctly in a sentence.
[Amy nods at her.]
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  #465  
Old 06-20-2017, 07:30 PM
RivkahChaya RivkahChaya is offline
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You're not supposed to be enjoying this.

Then maybe you should spank me harder.
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  #466  
Old 06-21-2017, 02:52 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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The next chapter’s about the potty training. Bed wetting. Masturbation. Basically if something came out of me, she wrote about it.
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  #467  
Old 06-23-2017, 01:49 AM
Brooky Brooky is offline
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You're sitting with a girl wearing whored makeup, let's get on the dance floor & see if you can make me sweat through these dress shields!
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  #468  
Old 06-23-2017, 03:00 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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You still go left!
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  #469  
Old 06-23-2017, 05:22 AM
Brooky Brooky is offline
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Let's face it ~ In this dress....the perfect combination of Madonna & Whore!
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  #470  
Old 06-23-2017, 10:27 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Every time my Dad stayed out all night my Mom put hamster poop in his chewing tobacco.
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  #471  
Old 06-23-2017, 11:05 AM
Brooky Brooky is offline
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You keep in mind my sharply wielded comments on Yelp.com recently took down a Muffin Shop
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  #472  
Old 06-25-2017, 04:20 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Sheldon: Amy, this isn’t easy to say. All relationships are difficult, but even more so when you’re in one with a person who struggles with everyday social interactions and frankly who can strike some people as being kind of a weirdo.
Amy: Sheldon, you’re not a weirdo.
Sheldon: I wasn’t speaking about me.
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  #473  
Old 06-25-2017, 03:03 PM
Brooky Brooky is offline
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I have a kinda-sorta boyfriend playing with a toy train right now and you don't hear me bitching about it!
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  #474  
Old 06-26-2017, 04:07 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Howard: [singing to quarantined Bernadette, the other five backing him up]
If I didn't have you
Life would be blue.
I'd be Doctor Who without the TARDIS.
A candle without a wick,
A Watson without a Crick.
I'd be one of my outfits without a dicky.
I'd be cheese without the mac,
Jobs without the Wozniak.
I'd be solving exponential equations that use bases not found on your calculator making them much harder to crack.
I'd be an atom without the bomb.
A dot without the com.
And I'd probably still live with my mom.
Friends: And he'd probably still live with his mom.
Howard: Ever since I met you, you turned my world around.
You supported all my dreams and all my hopes.
You're like Uranium-235, and I'm Uranium-238:
Almost inseparable isotopes.
I couldn't have imagined how good my life would get,
From the moment that I met you, Bernadette.
Bernadette: [choked up] Oh, Howie!
Howard: If I didn't have you,
Life would be dreary.
I'd be string theory without any string.
I'd be binary code without a one.
A cathode ray tube without an electron gun.
I'd be Firefly, Buffy and Avengers without Joss Whedon.
I'd speak a lot more Klingon.
Heghlu'meH QaQ jajvam [Klingon for "Today is a good day to die."]
Friends: And he'd definitely still live with his mom.
Howard: Ever since I met you, you turned my world around.
You're my best friend and my lover.
We're like changing electric and magnetic fields,
You can't have one without the other.
I couldn't have imagined how good my life would get,
From the moment that I met you, Bernadette.
Everyone: Oh, we couldn't have imagined how good our lives would get,
From the moment that we met you, Bernadette.
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  #475  
Old 06-26-2017, 10:17 PM
RivkahChaya RivkahChaya is offline
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Proxima centauri's the nearest star
The celestial bodies that follow are
Alpha centauri A, Toli, Barnard's Star,
Wolf 359 Laland 21185, Sirius A, Sirius B
BL Ceti, UV Ceti, Ross 154, Ross 248
Epsilon Eridani, Lac 9352, Ross 128
EZ Aquarii A, EZ Aquarii B EZ Aquarii C
Procyon A.

These are the stars that are nearest to me;
Tra-la-la and Fiddle-dee-dee!
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  #476  
Old 06-27-2017, 01:16 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Sheldon: This table. It’s in square centimeters. I read it in square meters. Do you know what that means?
Amy: That Americans can’t handle the metric system?
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  #477  
Old 06-27-2017, 04:41 AM
Brooky Brooky is offline
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How can you not know how to use glue? Did you ditch pre-school?

Ya I was dating a second grader~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~```
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  #478  
Old 06-28-2017, 01:28 PM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Bill Nye: Wow, Arthur Jeffries. It’s an honor to meet you. My show never would have happened without yours.
Professor Proton: That’s what I told my lawyers.
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  #479  
Old 07-02-2017, 12:53 PM
Brooky Brooky is offline
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I think the message is, Look at the rack on that Scientist!
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  #480  
Old 07-02-2017, 01:49 PM
Brooky Brooky is offline
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I think the message is
Look at the rack on that Scientist!
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  #481  
Old 07-03-2017, 08:47 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Zack: I'm not sure about this, I heard splitting affects the children.
Penny: Zack, we don't have any children!
Zack: Are you sure? Cause you didn't even know we were married until this morning.
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  #482  
Old 07-03-2017, 07:12 PM
RivkahChaya RivkahChaya is offline
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Originally Posted by panache45 View Post
Bill Nye: Wow, Arthur Jeffries. Itís an honor to meet you. My show never would have happened without yours.
Professor Proton: Thatís what I told my lawyers.
Back off Bow Tie!
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  #483  
Old 07-04-2017, 04:58 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Amy: Sheldon, it’s a beautiful night. Why don’t you and I go for a walk together?
Sheldon: Everything is just sex with you, isn’t it?
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  #484  
Old 07-05-2017, 12:30 PM
Annie-Xmas Annie-Xmas is offline
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Sheldon: You don’t know what it’s like to feel completely frustrated. To have a desire build up within you and be denied any opportunity for release.

Amy: Yeah, sounds like a drag.
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  #485  
Old 07-05-2017, 05:55 PM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Amy: Can we maybe put the phones down and have an actual human conversation?
Sheldon: We can, but thanks to Steve Jobs, we don’t have to.
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  #486  
Old 07-06-2017, 05:39 PM
Brooky Brooky is offline
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She touched my arm for 2 Mississippi's~~
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  #487  
Old 07-07-2017, 03:03 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Leonard: [on the phone] Yes, how much for a hundred long stemmed red roses? -- Really? -- How much for three?
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  #488  
Old 07-07-2017, 03:10 AM
Brooky Brooky is offline
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You snipped Gene Roddenberry's vas deferens! Wow, you really have been where no man has been before~
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  #489  
Old 07-07-2017, 03:45 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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This morning at Starbucks a pair of old underwear fell out of my pant leg. And it wasn't the only one in there.
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  #490  
Old 07-07-2017, 04:12 AM
Brooky Brooky is offline
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Now that Howard's getting married, maybe he'll inflate one of his women for you
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  #491  
Old 07-07-2017, 04:15 AM
Brooky Brooky is offline
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Now that Howard's getting married, maybe he'll inflate one of his women for you~
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  #492  
Old 07-07-2017, 10:00 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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It’s not funny anymore, James!
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  #493  
Old 07-11-2017, 11:53 AM
Annie-Xmas Annie-Xmas is offline
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Sheldon: My point is I don’t like when things change. So, regardless of your feelings, I would like you to continue dating Leonard. And also, while we’re on the subject, you recently changed your shampoo. I’m not comfortable with the new scent. Please stop this madness and go back to green apple.
Penny: Okay, honey, I have a lot to figure out, and until I do, you are not to say a word to Leonard. Do you understand?
Sheldon: I do. You clear on the shampoo issue?
Penny: Get out.
Sheldon: Penny?
Penny: What?
Sheldon: Please don’t hurt my friend.
Penny: That is the last thing I want to do.
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  #494  
Old 07-12-2017, 01:46 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Howard, which pocket watch will you be wearing at dinner on the train?
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  #495  
Old 07-16-2017, 10:33 PM
Brooky Brooky is offline
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I shouldn't be raising a kid, I don't even eat my vegetables
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  #496  
Old 07-17-2017, 04:05 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Leonard: Our babies will be smart and beautiful.
Sheldon: Not to mention imaginary.
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  #497  
Old 08-03-2017, 08:32 AM
Annie-Xmas Annie-Xmas is offline
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Sheldon: Knock knock knock* Amy *knock knock knock* Amy *knock knock knock* Amy. Will you marry me?
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  #498  
Old 08-04-2017, 05:12 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Leonard: What makes you think she wouldn't have sex with me? I'm a male and she's a female.
Sheldon: Yes, but not of the same species.
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  #499  
Old Yesterday, 06:36 AM
Brooky Brooky is offline
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It's been pointed out by my girlfriend I may have been rude to you.

She sounds like a keeper~~
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  #500  
Old Yesterday, 08:16 AM
Annie-Xmas Annie-Xmas is offline
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I just gave you my virginity, woman. Cool your jets!
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