#1  
Old 12-08-2012, 12:45 PM
chappachula chappachula is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 5,183
Who won this fight....me, or the cat?

Facts, part one:
I approach my computer desk, because I want to read the Dope.
The cat is curled up on the chair.
So I pick her up, sit down on the chair, and put her back in position, still curled up, on my lap.
I skritch her ears, to reassure her that the world has not ended.
She purrs.
---------------------------

Facts, part two:
I remove my hand from her ear-skritching, because I want to type on the keyboard.
She stands up on my lap, jumps onto the computer desk, settles down in the sphinx position
And blocking my view of the screen. And purrs.
----------------------------

Facts, part the third:
I give her a tap on the butt, and ask her to please move.
She stops purring, but does not move.
I give her a slight shove on the butt, pushing her far enough to let me see the computer screen.
She lets me scoot her sideways, still in the sphinx position. She then stands up , walks back to the previous spot, and settles down again like the sphinx, blocking my view of the screen. And purrs.
-----------------------------

Facts , part the fourth:
I shove her sideways again. She stops purring, but placidly scoots along with my hand.
Then she stands up, walks back to the previous spot, and settles down again like the sphinx, blocking my view of the screen. And purrs.
------------------------------
Facts, part 5:
repeat of facts, part the fourth.
------------------------------

Facts, part 6:
I move the computer screen sideways to the spot where I had previously pushed the cat.
The screen placidly scoots along with my hand.
The cat remains in her spot, still sphinx-like, and still purring.
--------------------------------

The Final Result:
I have now achieved my goal of reading the Dope.
The cat is purring.
Life is good.

But who won?



oh, and in case somebody thinks I'm violating the rules:
here's Ms. Cat, in a previous encounter with the computer

Last edited by chappachula; 12-08-2012 at 12:50 PM.
Advertisements  
  #2  
Old 12-08-2012, 12:49 PM
Chefguy Chefguy is offline
Charter Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Portlandia
Posts: 38,043
The cat. The cat always wins. That's why they're cats.
  #3  
Old 12-08-2012, 12:51 PM
IvoryTowerDenizen IvoryTowerDenizen is online now
"Superstar"
Moderator
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: North Shore of LI
Posts: 18,191
You did. When the cat is happy, you achieve happiness.

(But yeah, the cat won).
  #4  
Old 12-08-2012, 12:52 PM
running coach running coach is online now
Charter Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Riding my handcycle
Posts: 31,250
You're still alive so you won. For now.
Do not go to sleep.
  #5  
Old 12-08-2012, 01:00 PM
Oakminster Oakminster is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Surefall Glade, Antonica
Posts: 18,722
The cat won. Everyday is Caturday.
  #6  
Old 12-08-2012, 01:34 PM
TriPolar TriPolar is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: rhode island
Posts: 36,874
There's no question here, by definition the cat wins.
  #7  
Old 12-08-2012, 01:53 PM
Mr. Accident Mr. Accident is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: The Boondocks
Posts: 1,054
The cat won, since it forced you to find another salution. You do get bonus points for finding sn option that suits both of you though.
  #8  
Old 12-08-2012, 02:32 PM
eclectic wench eclectic wench is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 1,642
I don't even have to read the post. The cat won.
  #9  
Old 12-08-2012, 02:59 PM
Sahirrnee Sahirrnee is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 7,957
When you find the headless mouse on your pillow tonight you'll know who won. Don't be deceived by her seeming compliance with the solution.
  #10  
Old 12-08-2012, 06:47 PM
Ibanez Ibanez is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Earth
Posts: 1,968
Funny my cat use to do something like this during the colder part of the year. While sitting at my pc she would walk back and forth over my keyboard, infront of the monitor until I placed a pillow on my lap so she could lie down and enjoy the heat.

But that wasn't enough, she'd then look up and meow for scritches. If you stopped and she hadn't had enough she'd let you know.

As far as who won ? Looks like a draw.

Last edited by Ibanez; 12-08-2012 at 06:51 PM.
  #11  
Old 12-08-2012, 08:55 PM
FlyByNight512 FlyByNight512 is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 806
The cat got you to accommodate her. She wins.

However, you got a friendly, purring kitteh, which makes a very good consolation prize. What a cutie.
  #12  
Old 12-08-2012, 08:58 PM
grama grama is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Santiago, Chile
Posts: 209
Dogs have Masters...



...Cats have Staff.
  #13  
Old 12-08-2012, 09:19 PM
InternetLegend InternetLegend is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: New Mexico
Posts: 3,584
This is an important fact about cat people. We know that the cat always wins, and we accept that as the natural order of things. Hell, in our household, even the dog accepts it.
  #14  
Old 12-08-2012, 11:15 PM
ExTank ExTank is offline
Charter Member
 
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: Creve Coeur, MO
Posts: 6,317
For this Round: Cat 1, chappachula 0.
  #15  
Old 12-08-2012, 11:25 PM
Postariti Postariti is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 419
You must be trolling. The cat won. You know it, we know it, the cat knows it.

WAIT! Was this posted by the cat, using her human's sign-in? That would mean...

...the cat won. Which we already knew.
  #16  
Old 12-08-2012, 11:35 PM
Duckster Duckster is offline
Charter Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Posts: 14,399
If you have to ask, you already lost.
  #17  
Old 12-09-2012, 12:58 AM
owlfan owlfan is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 90
The only time the cat loses is if it is to another cat. At our house the winner is always the smallest, who is also the only female.
  #18  
Old 12-09-2012, 04:22 AM
drewtwo99 drewtwo99 is offline
BANNED
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Houston, Texas
Posts: 8,757
My cat does NOT always win.

And then I find poop and or pee on my bed the next day

So yes... the cat always wins.
  #19  
Old 12-09-2012, 04:32 AM
Gagundathar Gagundathar is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: East TN Mtns USA,NA,Sol3
Posts: 4,101
Who won the fight?
!
Is this a serious question?
  #20  
Old 12-09-2012, 04:35 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: NE Ohio (the 'burbs)
Posts: 39,256
Now that the cat knows it's ok to move your opponent mid-fight . . . let us know what happens next time.

In other words, the cat won.
  #21  
Old 12-09-2012, 01:50 PM
TreacherousCretin TreacherousCretin is offline
Horrified Onlooker
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Moscow, Idaho
Posts: 5,017
You both won.
  #22  
Old 12-09-2012, 07:07 PM
Eureka Eureka is online now
Charter Member
 
Join Date: Sep 1999
Posts: 5,318
Sounds like the cat won.
  #23  
Old 12-09-2012, 08:59 PM
Grrr! Grrr! is offline
Charter Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Posts: 14,391
Sounds like somebody needs a squirt bottle.
  #24  
Old 12-09-2012, 09:13 PM
running coach running coach is online now
Charter Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Riding my handcycle
Posts: 31,250
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shakes View Post
Sounds like somebody needs a squirt bottle.
That's silly. How would a cat work a squirt bottle?
  #25  
Old 12-09-2012, 09:26 PM
carnut carnut is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: State of Hockey
Posts: 4,363
The cat won by forcing you to modify your behavior to achieve happiness.
  #26  
Old 12-09-2012, 10:43 PM
stui magpie stui magpie is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Melbourne Australia
Posts: 1,675
This is why I don't have a cat.

My response to Part One would have been to first say "WTF is this cat doing on my chair?", pick up said moggy and deposit it in the front garden, closing front door behind me.
  #27  
Old 12-10-2012, 06:49 AM
Seanette Seanette is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 4,443
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shakes View Post
Sounds like somebody needs a squirt bottle.
I prefer an air-duster can. Safer around electronics.
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 08:47 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.

Send questions for Cecil Adams to: cecil@chicagoreader.com

Send comments about this website to: webmaster@straightdope.com

Terms of Use / Privacy Policy

Advertise on the Straight Dope!
(Your direct line to thousands of the smartest, hippest people on the planet, plus a few total dipsticks.)

Publishers - interested in subscribing to the Straight Dope?
Write to: sdsubscriptions@chicagoreader.com.

Copyright 2017 Sun-Times Media, LLC.

 
Copyright © 2017