#1  
Old 09-04-2017, 10:02 AM
EddyTeddyFreddy's Avatar
EddyTeddyFreddy is offline
Charter Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Exurbia, No'thuh Bawst'n
Posts: 13,173

A Litter Box Surprise


When you've got indoor cats, you've got litter boxes. When you've got litter boxes, you've got to clean them. When you've got to clean them, you find poop.

But....

How often do you find a poop tower? Not several discrete turdlets piled more or less neatly into a pyramid, no, no. Not even one long turd spiraling up like so much soft-serve ice cream (sorry...).

Nope. I'm talking vertical turditude. One solid giant excremental deposit, at least three inches long, nearly an inch wide at its base and tapering only slightly to its blunt-cone tip, lodged an inch deep in the level expanse of litter, standing up straight and proud.

I gazed at the collection of possible culprits gathered around me for breakfast, eyebrow raised in inquiry. They ignored the eyebrow and continued insisting they were about to expire RIGHT NOW of starvation and neglect, then waddled joyfully after me as I sighed and went on to the kitchen.

I never did find out whodunit.


P.S. Yes, I did think of photographing it and sharing its glory, but TMI, folks....
__________________
Dude, your statistical average, which was already in the toilet, just took a plunge into the Earth's mantle. ~ iampunha
Well, maybe you shouldn't use the political equivalent of the Weekly World News as a factual source. Just sayin'. ~ RTFirefly
Brought to you as a public service by EddyTeddyFreddy Industries, Inc., purveyors of wit, wisdom, badinage, and run-on sentences since 1949.
  #2  
Old 09-04-2017, 11:00 AM
jasg is offline
Charter Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Upper left hand corner
Posts: 5,824
Are you friends with George Clooney?
  #3  
Old 09-04-2017, 11:01 AM
Malleus, Incus, Stapes! is offline
Guest
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Middle ear
Posts: 6,342
The litterbox surprise I keep finding is ants, the really big ones. There must be a next of them near the downstairs box, and I'm nearsighted, and I've about had heart attack several times seeing what looks like poop crumbs up and moving, only to look closer and see that it's ants.
  #4  
Old 09-04-2017, 11:27 AM
ThelmaLou's Avatar
ThelmaLou is online now
Member
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Neither here nor there
Posts: 15,227
I couldn't resist your thread title, and I, for one, would like a picture. PM me or put the link in a spoiler box (if it's not too late). Avant garde art being what it is, you could have a moneymaker on your hands. After all, there's a book on why cats paint. Hell, anyone can paint. Three-dimensional art-- now that's ART!

I have three cats, but, mercifully, two of them go outside. When Max, the strictly indoor guy, creates, er, art, I can always tell, because he comes flying out of the bathroom like he's been shot from a cannon. He doesn't stick around to look at it or cover it up-- he's just outta there! That's my signal to go and scoop, which in my tiny house is a Good Thing.
  #5  
Old 09-04-2017, 12:11 PM
peedin is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 2,893
My sister's late cat left a Stonehenge of poo (band name!) near the box....
  #6  
Old 09-04-2017, 01:57 PM
EddyTeddyFreddy's Avatar
EddyTeddyFreddy is offline
Charter Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Exurbia, No'thuh Bawst'n
Posts: 13,173
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThelmaLou View Post
I couldn't resist your thread title, and I, for one, would like a picture. PM me or put the link in a spoiler box (if it's not too late).
Alas, it's too late; once the little monsters were fed, I dutifully scooped all four boxes, dislodging the turd tower and thus discovering just how deep its foundations were sunk. Tower and all were duly deposited in the compost bin.

Yes, compost; it's true we're told not to put cat poop in backyard compost piles, but my town does curbside compost collection, and it all goes to a commercial facility whose piles generate enough heat to kill all those feline-excreted pathogens.

And you thought household trash collection was a nasty job....
  #7  
Old 09-04-2017, 02:03 PM
EddyTeddyFreddy's Avatar
EddyTeddyFreddy is offline
Charter Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Exurbia, No'thuh Bawst'n
Posts: 13,173
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThelmaLou View Post
He doesn't stick around to look at it or cover it up-- he's just outta there! That's my signal to go and scoop, which in my tiny house is a Good Thing.
Peanut, the one with megacolon who's on daily laxatives, does cover his poops, or tries to, anyway; given the gigantic size of his (two to three times the diameter of ordinary cat feces), it's not especially effective, and given the colossal stench they emit even when mostly buried, scooping immediately is DEFCON 1.
  #8  
Old 09-04-2017, 02:15 PM
ThelmaLou's Avatar
ThelmaLou is online now
Member
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Neither here nor there
Posts: 15,227
Quote:
Originally Posted by EddyTeddyFreddy View Post
Peanut, the one with megacolon who's on daily laxatives, does cover his poops, or tries to, anyway; given the gigantic size of his (two to three times the diameter of ordinary cat feces), it's not especially effective, and given the colossal stench they emit even when mostly buried, scooping immediately is DEFCON 1.
You are totally cracking me up!

I live in a 1926 Craftsman-style house which has a central hallway that all of the rooms come off of. In the olden days before the previous owner installed central heat/air, there was a radiator in the hall and the design was such air circulation to all the rooms for heating purposes was and is excellent. See where I'm goin' with this? One poop and the smell is instantly available in all the rooms.
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 07:24 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.

Send questions for Cecil Adams to: cecil@straightdope.com

Send comments about this website to: webmaster@straightdope.com

Terms of Use / Privacy Policy

Advertise on the Straight Dope!
(Your direct line to thousands of the smartest, hippest people on the planet, plus a few total dipsticks.)

Copyright 2018 STM Reader, LLC.

 
Copyright © 2017