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Old 03-23-2020, 04:18 PM
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Where have you gone Cecil Adams? Our nation turns its Covid-19 eyes to you.


Look. Stuff is happening. Things are getting strange.

People have questions. The Straight Dope is needed now more than ever.

Forget the ownership/retirement thing. Time to do what you do best. Debunk, inform, amuse.

For example: I want to know if Covid-19 is going to make the Fatberg Apocalypse more or less likely?
  #2  
Old 03-23-2020, 04:45 PM
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I miss Cecil, too. This is what happens when leadership downsizes and then there's an emergency!
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Old 03-23-2020, 04:52 PM
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I want Cecil. I've been hunting/begging shamelessly for him for weeks.
And, there's no reason to think he doesn't want to know me.
Who wouldn't?

Unca Cece~give a pitiful sick, just released from the hospital, sans Pancho and laying in a bed woman, a little thrill. Pleeeeeeeeeeeeease.


(Also I friended you and haven't had a response )

Last edited by Beckdawrek; 03-23-2020 at 04:53 PM.
  #4  
Old 03-23-2020, 05:45 PM
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Cecil's not here, man.
  #5  
Old 03-23-2020, 06:10 PM
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What's that you say, lil' Ed Zottie?
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  #6  
Old 03-23-2020, 06:13 PM
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I'm of the belief Cecil is lurking. You just can't turn off a big brain like that easily.
I'm here Cecil Adams. I'm here.
  #7  
Old 03-23-2020, 06:28 PM
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Zotti was fired and not replaced. There isn't a Cecil anymore and Zotti hasn't logged in here in years.
  #8  
Old 03-23-2020, 09:21 PM
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Fired? I thought Li'l Ed retired.
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  #9  
Old 03-23-2020, 09:24 PM
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I thought he went out for coffee. ()
  #10  
Old 03-23-2020, 10:52 PM
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Fired? I thought Li'l Ed retired.
You are mistaken.
  #11  
Old 03-24-2020, 06:16 AM
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...Zotti hasn't logged in here in years.
I remember a post from no more than two years ago, but I'm not sure how to find it or if I'm even remembering correctly. My first thought was to find a post of his and check the "find all posts by" function, but I haven't been able to find any of his posts. Someone else?

It would be interesting to determine when anyone's last contact with him was. It's occurred to me that he may be dying.

Last edited by jerez; 03-24-2020 at 06:18 AM.
  #12  
Old 03-24-2020, 06:57 AM
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I remember a post from no more than two years ago, but I'm not sure how to find it or if I'm even remembering correctly. My first thought was to find a post of his and check the "find all posts by" function, but I haven't been able to find any of his posts. Someone else?

It would be interesting to determine when anyone's last contact with him was. It's occurred to me that he may be dying.
His last post was in July of 2018 so it was more recent than I thought. Im not sure why you think hes dying. Thats quite a leap.

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/...3#post21062083
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Old 03-24-2020, 07:02 AM
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I thought he went out for coffee. ()
Nah. Cigarettes and lottery tickets.
  #14  
Old 03-24-2020, 07:05 AM
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...I’m not sure why you think he’s dying. That’s quite a leap...
Yes, of course it is. Just a feeling I sometimes get (when I look to the West), and I'm wrong more often than not.

Thanks for digging that up.

Last edited by jerez; 03-24-2020 at 07:07 AM.
  #15  
Old 03-24-2020, 07:38 AM
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He went to a nice farm upstate, where he can chase rabbits all day.
  #16  
Old 03-24-2020, 08:08 AM
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He went to a nice farm upstate, where he can chase rabbits all day.
This is Chicago, IL we're talking about. There's virtually no "upstate" there. The correct term would be "downstate". Rabbits are still the object of chases, of course.

What part of "The Teeming Millions" are the owners not interested in clicks from?
  #17  
Old 03-25-2020, 07:37 PM
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This is Chicago, IL we're talking about. There's virtually no "upstate" there. The correct term would be "downstate". Rabbits are still the object of chases, of course.
"Upstate" means Wisconsin, then. He's roaming freely on my farm, chasing rabbits, deer, wild turkeys, pheasants, and fighting with coyotes.
  #18  
Old 03-25-2020, 08:12 PM
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If Cecil is roaming Wisconsin on the Qads land he can slip in the house and post.
I know he wants to. I mean how much frolicking fun can one huge 'Brain' with a body have.
Perfect Master that he is, and all, he must want to know me. I'm irresistible ()
  #19  
Old 03-26-2020, 07:05 AM
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"Upstate" means Wisconsin, then. He's roaming freely on my farm, chasing rabbits, deer, wild turkeys, pheasants, and fighting with coyotes.
If it's a different state, then shouldn't that be up ... country ???

But, kidding aside. I'm am serious that Cecil should be brought back with the Straight Dope on the current situation. Forget what happened and why. Just make it so.

Last edited by ftg; 03-26-2020 at 07:06 AM.
  #20  
Old 03-26-2020, 07:15 AM
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If it's a different state, then shouldn't that be up ... country ???

But, kidding aside. I'm am serious that Cecil should be brought back with the Straight Dope on the current situation. Forget what happened and why. Just make it so.
Who is going to pay Ed to start playing Cecil again? Hes certainly not going to do it as volunteer work and, especially these days, no media company is going to lose money by hiring a columnist.
  #21  
Old 03-26-2020, 09:28 AM
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This is Chicago, IL we're talking about. There's virtually no "upstate" there.
Waukegan is upstate.
  #22  
Old 03-26-2020, 11:19 AM
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Who is going to pay Ed to start playing Cecil again? Hes certainly not going to do it as volunteer work and, especially these days, no media company is going to lose money by hiring a columnist.
::::fingers in ears:::::I can't hear you.

I assume Lil'Ed is a lifetime member of the SDMB. As well as Cecil. Nobody needs to be paid.

Unca Cecil, come tell us 'hi' for moral support! Pah---lease!
  #23  
Old 03-26-2020, 04:56 PM
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Who is going to pay Ed to start playing Cecil again? Hes certainly not going to do it as volunteer work and, especially these days, no media company is going to lose money by hiring a columnist.
I see people writing columns all over the Internet. People are making money doing this. Ads, endorsements, clicks, and all that. And it's easier to make money the more famous you are. Cecil Adams was pretty far up that scale in terms of columnists.

I had assumed it was the usual "we're going in a different direction" stuff. But "Cecil Adams" is a brand that's just sitting there, mostly unused. And now would be a great time to launch but do it Internet-style rather than the old school free weekly thing.

And, basically, America needs the Straight Dope again. Time for some people to put that ahead of business-think and go for it.
  #24  
Old 03-26-2020, 05:42 PM
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I see people writing columns all over the Internet. People are making money doing this. Ads, endorsements, clicks, and all that. And it's easier to make money the more famous you are. Cecil Adams was pretty far up that scale in terms of columnists.

I had assumed it was the usual "we're going in a different direction" stuff. But "Cecil Adams" is a brand that's just sitting there, mostly unused. And now would be a great time to launch but do it Internet-style rather than the old school free weekly thing.

And, basically, America needs the Straight Dope again. Time for some people to put that ahead of business-think and go for it.
It sounds like you have an incredible business plan there. How much of your own money are you willing to invest.
  #25  
Old 03-26-2020, 05:44 PM
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I'm agreeing with you ftg. I want Unca Cecil.
We need the straightdope on this virus.
Think of the children, Unca Cecil. ()
  #26  
Old 03-27-2020, 07:03 AM
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It sounds like you have an incredible business plan there. How much of your own money are you willing to invest.
I am not in the Internet column business, but I see a ton of them around. The Atlantic, Slate, etc. all have them. I assume that these writers are not doing it for free. I also assume that the media company that owns the rights to the column is far from ignorant of these matters.

Either they have a "thing" about such a business model or are incompetent. So the Cecil Adams brand lies fallow when it could be used. Just sell it off to someone who will actually put it to its God given function.

(Reading about the upheavals at the Reader since the latest owners took over indicates that there is indeed some less-than-savvy people about. This reinforces the "just sell off the CA rights" argument.)

And I agree: Think of the children.
  #27  
Old 03-27-2020, 07:33 AM
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It might be good to have a small group of Dopers serve as a collective Cecil, answering one vital question in a mini-essay each week.

Imagine the incisiveness of Stranger on a Train, the clarity of monstro, the wit of Vinyl Turnip, and a few others getting together (remotely) to do this? It would be nice if they could get paid, even if the group consisted of folks who had a lot of time on their hands. (The three I mentioned don’t have much time on their hands, I’m pretty sure — I just chose them to exemplify the blend of wit, wisdom, and evidence-based observations that we all loved about Cecil.)

Unlikely to happen, but a nice little thing to imagine.

Last edited by JKellyMap; 03-27-2020 at 07:35 AM.
  #28  
Old 03-27-2020, 10:09 AM
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I am not in the Internet column business, but I see a ton of them around. The Atlantic, Slate, etc. all have them. I assume that these writers are not doing it for free. I also assume that the media company that owns the rights to the column is far from ignorant of these matters.
Me too. That's why they are not interested in investing in it.

Quote:
Either they have a "thing" about such a business model or are incompetent. So the Cecil Adams brand lies fallow when it could be used. Just sell it off to someone who will actually put it to its God given function.
Yet no one is clamoring to buy it. I am certain that, especially now, they'd sell it off at a bargain price

Quote:
(Reading about the upheavals at the Reader since the latest owners took over indicates that there is indeed some less-than-savvy people about. This reinforces the "just sell off the CA rights" argument.)
Contact them and make an offer. When they decided to dump the whole thing, they were losing papers who were willing to pay for the rights to publish the column because either the papers ceased to exist or didn't want to pay for it. You still might know differently though.
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